I Thought I Knew
by dll10
Summary: A vampire's nature is so fixed, unchanging. What happens when unparalleled trust is placed in the face of the ultimate betrayal? Is it enough to alter the course of things, and what everyone thought they knew? A retelling of Breaking Dawn where Edward's reaction to Bella's pregnancy causes her to turn to Jasper for protection and find love in a very unlikely place.
1. 1: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I planned this story out almost six years ago and I'm finally getting around to actually writing it. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think! Also, I'm trying to write this in third person, but my last two stories have been in first. That said, occasionally I'm finding it hard to not slip back into my old habit - please let me know if you catch me doing it!

I should also mention that I don't hate Edward. I think his character can be very controlling at times, and occasionally condescending and patronizing, but I don't hate him by any means. No one is perfect and those are just some of his personality flaws. He will have him moments in this story where you'll probably assume I don't actually like him and have used him to be the bad guy. Really it's more that his actions will have consequences that result in new developments for the other characters. Eventually everyone, including Edward, will end up happy and better off. I hope you stick around long enough to see that happen.

This will alternate between Alice, Jasper, and Bella's perspectives throughout the story, and be told in three nine chapter parts with each character getting three chapters centered around that person.

Also, if you aren't a fan of the Bella/Jasper pairing and know you'll hate seeing them end up together don't bother reading, or if you do anyways, please don't complain to me when they get together - that's sort of the point of this story…

PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Part 1: Enigma

One is never afraid of the unknown; one is afraid of the known coming to an end.

Jiddu Krishnamurti

* * *

Chapter 1 - Alice

Cullen House

"So, Alice, is Eddie-boy gonna to kill her?" Emmett casually asked from the couch where he'd been watching a football game. The question had him abandoning the game in favor of turning to look at his sister on the back of the sofa, curiosity making his dark, curly head tilt slightly.

"Emmett! That's not something to joke about," Esme scolded motherly, a worried frown carved into her beautiful face. She'd been finishing up a design for a new kitchen that a client from Seattle had commissioned ever since Bella and Edward left for their honeymoon, but now she too paused and waited anxiously for Alice to relieve her fears.

"Yeah, but is he?" Emmett asked more seriously.

"Serves her right if he does," Rosalie muttered vindictively from upstairs. Everyone ignored the comment. Rose's feelings were already well known and didn't deserve a rebuke when everyone was equally aware that it would do no good.

"I've put off looking since they left," Alice admitted quietly, turning from the computer to take in Esme and Emmett both watching her intently.

The family had decided to fix up the little cottage on the property for Edward and Bella to live in when they returned, and Alice was shopping for some personal touches to add to it. Esme would likely do the majority of the decorating, but Alice's sight kept prompting her to seek out extras she knew would be absolutely perfect for the place. Though she had to admit that a number of her recent purchases didn't make much sense. They were all too dark. Nearly everyone in the family preferred lighter colors. Jasper was really the only one that sought out things in navy, forest green, burgundy, and black. Maybe transitioning into a vampire would alter Bella's tastes. _Anything_ would be better than her current preferences.

"Don't want to see Edward's first -" Emmett began teasing, but stopped when Alice growled ferociously at him, baring all of her gleaming, venom-coated teeth.

It wasn't that she was particularly interested in witnessing Edward's first fumbling foray into making love, but she did want to know if he could handle it. He always kept such a tight leash on his emotions that this was sure to test the limits of his composure. Alice wouldn't be able to bear it if Bella was hurt and she could have prevented it with a warning just by taking a peak at how they spent this evening.

"These last weeks… the outcome keeps changing," she said, frustration clear.

Alice hated not knowing. It was her job, her way to protect the family! They needed her foresight. But here she was - _useless_. Edward's uncertainty left her in limbo, and the only thing she had been able to see was that there was nothing more she could do except wait.

The newlyweds should be on the island by now though. Bella wasn't likely to put the subject off for very long. If there was a chance to see and advert disaster then the time would be now and everyone seemed aware of it.

Carlisle entered the room silently, moving to Esme's side and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. He too was waiting for Alice to check. Esme reached to cover his hand, their fingers interlocking. Each taking and providing comfort from the other.

Alice closed her eyes to search.

Flickers. That was the only way to describe the rapid-fire flashes alternating from a bed dusted in feathers to scenes of the couple arguing and Bella crying, along with everything else Edward was insisting she keep an eye out for. After a moment they sorted themselves into a more linear stream that she could swipe through.

_Bella was sorting through the lingerie and trying to find one that would help her seduce Edward. Her embarrassment was clear from her pink cheeks and the way she gingerly picked up the red lace baby doll with two hesitant fingers only to put it back in the bag several times and ultimately deciding on a black ruffled number. _

Alice was glad she'd included so many choices. Apparently she'd been right to think Edward might need a few incentives to actually _be_ with Bella.

_Rose was going to buy Emmett tickets to a football game in Portland next month. They'd have to leave early though because of the sun. Emmett would be so furious that he missed seeing the game winning field goal in the last four seconds that he'd destroy several trees along the drive to the house. _

Alice rarely paid her sight much heed when it revealed events such as this. There were too many people involved in a single sport game, any one of which could make a decision that changed the outcome. Not to mention visions centered around the weather were notoriously unpredictable since it was always changing when they happened this far out. But she was so attuned to her family that any time one made a decision she saw something related to it whether momentous or not.

_Bella was taking a shower before joining Edward, and seeing to all of her various human needs. It was a stalling tactic. She was visibly nervous, her breathing fast and erratic as she sat on the floor wrapped in only a fluffy white towel. _

_Edward was taking Bella snorkeling in the little hidden cove on the other side of the island. He was keeping his distance so the fish, turtles, and porpoises would swim near Bella, but he was enjoying watching her pleasure as she took everything in. Not to mention that he enjoyed showing off his ability to go without oxygen. _

_Bella was grinning as she plucked feathers from her hair. The tangled mess resembled a bird's nest. Every few seconds she'd close her eyes and smile dreamily, enjoying her thoughts - likely some memory. There were noticeable bruises along her cheekbone and jaw, the skin deep red along the edges of the mark transitioning to bluish-purple at the center in both cases. Her lips were swollen and more purple than usual as well. Likely bruised or chaffed as well. _

Surly Edward had enough practice kissing Bella by now that those marks weren't from him. Surly! Perhaps this happens in a couple days and will be an injury Bella incurs from her island adventures.

_Esme was buying the peach and tan granite counter top instead of the grey and black. The warmer colors would open the room up and make it seem much more inviting to the young couple planning to start a family. _

_Edward was asking for a couple more days to prepare, insisting he needed them if he was to avoid hurting her. He planned to keep Bella so busy during the day that she fell asleep too exhausted and worn out to push for him to keep his promise. _

_Aro was sending Felix, Santiago, and Demetri to Guatemala, or perhaps even farther south, since the coven there had grown so large that they'd failed to go undetected. There were reports in the paper about drug related violence. Aro wanted his three guards to keep an eye on things for a few weeks, determine if anyone was worthy of being offered a second chance, and if the coven's numbers weren't decimated in their next skirmish, he would send Jane to help the three annihilate everyone. _

_Bella was crying and begging Edward to talk to her. She didn't understand why he'd stopped. He hadn't hurt her. She'd been enjoying his kissing, but he'd stopped anyways and refused to even consider trying. She begged. She pleaded. He looked agonized, but resolved. His only response was to say, "Jacob was right." _

Alice's sight was silent, but years of practice in addition to her vampiric-enhanced senses meant that she could easily read lips. It was rare that she wasn't able to determine what was said in a vision just by watching them speak.

_Edward's hands were gripping Bella's hips securely as he moved carefully, deliberately, over her obviously in the middle of making love to her. Her arms were wrapped around his back clutching him furtively to her. His eyes were glazed with passion, lost to emotion. Bella's head was thrown back, exposing the column of her throat to his deadly teeth. Edward's mouth opened as he stared down at the tempting offering, but after a moment he turned to bite brutally into the pillow beside her head. _

_Edward was tucking a tear-swollen, red-faced Bella into bed and wrapping himself around her sleeping form. He kissed her forehead and said, "One day you'll understand and forgive me. One day you'll agree that it would have been a mistake."_

It was disorienting. Only years of practice and understanding Edward allowed her to navigate and interpret the shifting images.

"Edward still isn't sure that he's actually going to try. He's searching for a way to back out and change Bella's mind," Alice informed the assembled group.

"Seriously?" Emmett asked incredulously. "Has he met her? When has Bella ever changed her mind?"

"We've spoken at length. I know Edward is strong enough to handle this if he tries," Carlisle said, confidence and trust in his oldest son evident.

"It's not like he'll last long enough to have time to do any damage anyways. Not after over -"

"Emmett, stop being crude," Esme scolded once more. If she was still capable of flushing, Alice was certain she would be at this moment.

Alice continued searching while Emmett apologized to their mother. Only she could invoke any sort of contrition from her largest son.

_Bella was joining Edward in the ocean wearing nothing more than a towel on the beach, and nothing when she reached his side. _

_Then there was the image of Bella covered in bruises and feathers. The mottled discolorations were a patchwork over her body - everywhere on her naked body was stripped in black and blue._

Alice stilled, forcing her focus to linger on the image of her beloved, fragile sister so banged up. There were nearly as many bruises as there'd been after James had attacked her last year. It was an alarming sight. Enough so that she made the decision to call Edward and warn him to be gentler.

That decision brought about yet another vision, this one much more distinct.

_Edward was refusing to touch Bella, even as she sobbed, heartbroken, in the seat beside him. They were on an airplane. The ticket Bella held crumpled in her fist indicated this would take place tomorrow. She was speaking, but Edward wasn't even looking at her. Instead, he'd scooted as far over as the chair and wall would let him as he tried to maintain distance between his body and hers, a hard, resolved set to his face that only seemed to upset Bella more. _

_The scene shifted and it was Carlisle changing Bella, not Edward. Bella looked gutted yet resigned. _

It was not the expression Alice ever expected to see considering how much Bella longed for her changing to happen. Edward hadn't even been in the room when Carlisle did it. Probably he was too worried about losing control or hurting her in some physical way. He couldn't see that he was inflicting emotional pain instead.

While Alice was fitting Bella for her wedding dress a few weeks ago, Bella had confessed how important it was to her that Edward be the one to change her. She'd said that his doing it would show her how much he loved her and wanted to keep her. For him to refuse to be the one to do it now… the lasting impact that would have…

Alice frowned. Transitioning from her human life - giving up her family and friends and learning to cope with all of the changes - was going to be difficult enough. Bella didn't need her doubts about Edward's feelings following her around for the rest of eternity. She already doubted him enough as it was. It was only a few bruises. She'd had worse. Best not to warn Edward after all.

"I'm sure that'll go over well," Carlisle said, sighing. He loved his son, but there were times, such as this, that he feared Edward's youth and inexperience prior to turning too strongly influenced his decisions, and not for the better.

"It won't," Alice said, frustrated as her foresight still refused to settle on one certain outcome for this night. "If he does they'll be home in a day. Two at most depending on layovers for the last minute flight," she warned.

"Oh dear," Esme said, sharing a look with Carlisle. It was a bleak prospect. Certainly not the happy, romantic honeymoon the couple should be engaging in.

"And if he does try?" Carlisle asked.

All at once the flowing current of pictures stopped, replaced with a single scene blooming to life in Alice's head. It was like watching a movie in technicolor only so much more vivid. These were Alice's favorite type of visions. The ones that she just knew would come to be. They were so real that her imagination could supply the missing details as if she were already there and it was already happening. The sound of the wind rustling the grass. The taste of pollen and spring flowers in the air. The feel of the sun's warmth as shafts of light danced merrily across her family's skin resulting in the prisms of rainbow light reflecting through the scene.

_Bella, eyes nearly the same golden as the rest of the Cullens' but with just a hint of yam orange lingering, was sitting gracefully on the porch steps. She was so still she could have been a statue carved from the most pristine marble and sheathed in denim and cotton. _

Alice would have to do something about her clothing before she got back. It simply wouldn't do for her to still be wearing her old things when she'd so obviously transitioned.

_Emmett and Rosalie were curled together on a porch swing, likely recently installed since there wasn't one outside just yet. Nearby, Esme was gardening. She appeared to be planting blue and purple irises, taking advantage of the rare sunny day. Alice was perched just above her on the railing, one leg dangling over and swinging gently. Esme reached to nudge her aside when it appeared Alice was distracted, likely lost in visions of the future, a wistful smile on her otherwise blank face. _

_Then Jasper came bounding up the drive, moving with the speed and grace of a cheetah. He looked incandescently happy, happier than Alice had ever seen him. When he reached the assembled group he scooped Bella up, spinning around with her draped over his shoulder as he laughed freely. _

When had Jasper ever laughed so joyously? So openly? Emmett could usual inspire a bright smile, and every now and then a single loud laugh, but never was Jazz so openly, boisterously amused.

_After setting Bella back down, he took his place beside her, looping an arm casually around her waist and tugging her closer with an ease and familiarity that spoke volumes in the silent vision. _

_Rosalie was smiling as she watched them, obviously approving and Emmett was saying something with his usual teasing grin, but Alice couldn't make it out with the way his head was turned. But it was something that had Bella burying her face in Jasper's neck and Rose elbowing her husband's side. For his part, Jasper leaned down to kiss Bella's temple before whispering something private that had her burrowing impossibly closer. The intimacy and affection between the pair was unmistakable. _

_Suddenly Jasper stood, fluidly untangling himself from Bella and turning back towards the direction he'd come from with his arms opened wide and legs bent as though braced to catch something. Everyone else had stopped what they were doing as well; all eagerly looking towards what or who was coming. _

Then it abruptly went black. Nothing.

That had never happened before. _Never_. Except when the wolves were involved, but that didn't make any sense just now, so it had to be something different. But what? _What could make her sight vanish without warning?_

Alice tried to isolate what decision had lead to the vision, tried to determine what happened next. Nothing. The future evaded her.

Alice had been so focused on Jasper the first time the vision panned out that she had not taken time to note her reaction to the events that took place. She took a moment to do so now, thinking back over it carefully. Unfazed. Happy even. How was that possible? Jasper was her life. She loved him dearly. They'd been together for decades. He was the first thing she saw when she woke, the reason she sought him out and her purpose for living those first few years as a vampire. So how was it possible for her to be so unaffected seeing him obviously in love with her newest sister? What's more, Alice seemed just as eager for what was coming as the rest. Just as eager for the mystery that stubbornly refused to reveal itself to her.

Only Edward and Carlisle had been missing from the group on this day that was likely to happen this coming spring if she had to guess. Bella hadn't looked any older and it had been obvious she was nearing the end of her newborn year. Carlisle's absence could be easily explained. He was likely at the hospital. But what about Edward? Where had he been?

"Alice?" Carlisle prompted now, concern etched deeply on his face. There was fear too, fear that he would lose both his daughter and his son if things didn't go well tonight.

They were used to having to wait occasionally as she filtered through all of the potential outcomes, but this had been a rather lengthy pause even for her.

"She'll survive tonight - one way or another." No one looked entirely relieved. "Bella will be one of us," Alice announced, infusing the words with confidence despite all the uncertainty clouding her mind after the strange vision. It was the only other truth she had to offer at the moment.

Tension seemed to drain from the room as everyone relaxed, that confirmation seeming to do the trick. Everyone, even Rosalie despite being loath to admit it, wanted Bella to be part of the family in a more permanent way.

"I'm going to hunt - in case they return early," Jasper murmured, slipping quietly from the room.

No one glanced up or acknowledged his departure.

Alice frowned once more. Jasper had always lingered on the periphery, remaining with the family more for her sake than his own desire for company. But it hadn't been like that in the vision. He'd been central. And again, Alice remembered that his happiness had been undeniable as well.

Since Alice had found Jasper he'd been content, grateful, protective. He loved her and felt such immense gratitude for the peace and easement from his past that she'd been able to provide. She had helped him find his humanity after Maria had robbed him of it. But after witnessing that scene, she had to wonder if he'd ever been truly happy with her and the Cullens - at least to the same degree or extent he apparently could be.

There was, after all, a difference between being satisfied with your life and honestly relishing it.

What had the vision meant? Why was she seeing it? Was she supposed to help it come to pass? Was it as certain to happen as it had felt like it was even if she did nothing? Was there any preventing it? _Should she even want to stop it? _

The bombardment of questions plagued her. It was so frustrating only having one piece of the puzzle!

Alice felt like stomping her foot in irritation. She thrilled for always being five steps ahead of her family. She wasn't meant to be in the dark. Not again. Not since becoming a vampire. And here she was, for the umpteenth time since returning to Forks, with no clue what the future held! And this time she couldn't even blame the wolves or pressure from Edward to watch for too many things at once!

* * *

For the next few weeks Alice obsessed over the vision, replaying it in her mind again and again, simultaneously thankful for the perfect recall that came with being a vampire and agonizing over every minute detail it allowed her to dissect.

She'd tried, unsuccessfully, to see what happened next. To learn what Jasper was welcoming. But always there was nothing except an endless black canvas. How utterly infuriating it was to not know! She honestly couldn't understand how others did it all the time.

Even as she agonized over the vision, she helped the others prepare the cottage. The insight the vision had given her prompted her to veto Esme's idea of trying to recreate a piece of Isle Esme in the bedroom. Part of Alice realized that with every decision she lead Esme to make, she was helping create a home for Bella to share with Jasper rather than Edward. The knowledge did nothing to stop her from acting even as she mentally bulked at the notion.

No one else seemed to notice. There was enough in the usual pale-on-pale color scheme that the majority of the family favored for her choices to go undetected. Not to mention the idea of Bella and Edward not staying together after everything they'd gone through to get to this point seemed ludicrous.

Alice wasn't sure how she felt. She'd relied on her visions for so long. Trusted them to show her what she needed to be happy, and ensure that her family was as well. The countless proof she had from the last century didn't make it any easier to accept that things could be changing. She longed to cling to the familiar, to dig in her heels like a spoiler three-year-old throwing a tantrum and refuse to relinquish her claim. Change was so very against their vampiric natures, but that didn't stop the fact that she could practically feel it coming.

All the while her relationship with Jasper was suffering. He'd returned from his hunt and immediately picked up on her tension and clouded, turbulent emotional state. There was no hiding it from her empathic husband. Her partner in all things for so long. He didn't understand why she was so distracted, what was keeping her so preoccupied now that the threats of Victoria and the Volturi were gone, or why she was deliberately putting distance between them.

"Are you upset with me? Am I going to hurt Bella again when she gets back?" Jazz asked one day when it was just the two of them working on the cottage.

It was rather telling that his first thought was that her preoccupation centered around danger to Bella - particularly his concern that he was the potential danger to her.

"Hmm?" Alice asked, tilting her head inquiringly.

"Is that what you've been looking for so intently? You're always on the lookout for me to slip. Did you see it happening? Bella's the only human I'm likely to be around in the foreseeable future. Am I going to hurt her?" Jasper asked, expanding on his own worries. Alice could feel his concern tainting the air, rippling outward from him like waves from a stone splashing into a pool of water.

"No! No. Nothing like that," Alice reassured him quickly, dancing over to touch his cheek lightly in reassurance, and trying half-heartedly to let him feel the sincerity of her words.

Jasper nodded, accepting her promise as truth. He always did. She was the one that knew the future, after all. He trusted her implicitly.

"Is there something else bothering you then?" Jasper whispered, closing his eyes and leaning into her light touch, seeking comfort and contact from his partner.

His medium was emotion, and usually he was content to taste the emotions Alice projected and return his in kind. Emotions were so much more honest than words, more difficult to trick or manipulate - at least from his perspective. Jasper could always sense the truth of emotions. It was part of his gift. But Alice was doing her best to mask hers. She had been for weeks now. It left Jasper feeling uncertain and insecure.

"No. Just trying to lock everything down. You know how I hate indecision. It makes things unnecessarily difficult," Alice said lightly, leaning up to kiss Jazz's cheek before skipping away to return to organizing Bella's bookcase. Jasper let it go at that, and they eventually returned to the main house without discussing it again.

For her part, Alice most wanted to understand the decision that lead to the vision before she shared anything or came to any conclusions herself.

Her focus was so centered on Bella and Edward's decisions that she ended up seeing far more of their honeymoon than she ever wanted to. Every activity. Every touch. Every kiss. Every time they made love. All of it. In detail. It was definitely an unwelcome side-effect of her frantic and obsessive searching.

She'd become so attuned to their decisions, though, that when Bella suddenly disappeared she panicked. One moment she saw Bella finding relief for her upset stomach before taking a nap to sleep off the worst of her food poisoning, the next, nothing!

Alice looked for her. Again. And again. But nothing. Bella's future had completely vanished.

She ran for the home phone in her room, dialing so fast her finger punched through the flimsy plastic. Growling in frustration, she darted from the room to where she'd left her cell phone on the dining room table beside the chess board. The remaining pieces from her game against Carlisle the night before were still set up announcing her victory.

Alice dialed more carefully this time, not wanting to be forced to seek out yet another phone. There wasn't time to waste on such things.

The phone rang. And rang. Did it always take Edward so long to answer? Didn't he understand how worried she was? The phone continued to ring. Alice could feel herself growling into the phone, the vibrations making her hand shake, but all she could hear was the computerized tone of the ringer. The monotone sound grating on her already jittery nerves. _Where was he? _

What if Bella had gotten hurt looking for the Pepto-Bismol and Edward had lost control? Was she too late to warn him? Was Bella already dead? What other reason -

"Hi, Alice," Bella said in a strange, strangled voice.

Alice felt an enormous wave of relief crash over her as the damn of fear broke and drown beneath her joy at hearing Bella. At hearing confirmation that Bella was alive. Her vision of Jasper being so happy could still happen. Then she frozen, brow wrinkling in confusion as she tried to see what had happened. Fear bubbled back up to the surface, suffocating what solace she'd discovered when Bella answered the phone.

Because Bella's future was still blank. Missing. Gone.


	2. 2: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Part 1 of this story will follow the book fairly closely, with a notable exception. Parts 2 and 3 will diverge more notably.

PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 2 - Bella

"Edward," Bella said tentatively.

He'd been anxious since leaving Rio, alternating between fidgeting unnecessarily and sitting as still as a statue just as he had when Bella told him she thought "she was pregnant. She'd never spent this much time with him when his focus wasn't directed entirely on her. It was disconcerting to say the least.

Barely a word had been uttered since they'd boarded the plane. She didn't know how he'd managed it, but he'd somehow acquired a private jet that had only stopped to refuel in Lima, Mexico City, and Las Vegas. The plane hadn't been idle for more than an hour in any one of the places. Bella had a feeling that a great deal of money had exchanged hands to make it happen, and the knowledge only added to her already queasy state.

She'd tried to talk to him earlier - at least when she hadn't been sleeping or throwing up - but he'd been too catatonic to acknowledge her. Particularly when she hadn't been able to keep down the saltines she'd packed to eat on the plane for the second time.

The few times he did speak, he'd mentioned destroying the child, and her mind would shut down and she'd stop trying to speak all together. The pain the thought caused too overwhelming to process properly. But now she was out of time. She could feel that the plane had started its descent into the small airport in Port Angeles.

"Just hang in there, Bella. We should be home in an hour," Edward murmured in what she guessed was supposed to be a reassuring tone.

Given the way the Cullen family drove she had no doubt that they would be back at the house in less than an hour. Her time was nearly up to make Edward see reason.

"Edward. Can we talk about this? Please. I -"

"Don't be scared, Bella. As soon as we get back Carlisle can get that - that _thing_ out of you," Edward said, anger distorting his perfect voice and making his face twist into a grimace of disgust and self-loathing.

Bella gasped, hugging her stomach tighter as though to protect the baby growing within from Edward's cruel words. _He doesn't mean it, Little One. _She mentally repeated the apology over and over. She couldn't speak. She didn't understand why he didn't see this as the miracle that she did. A firm nudge pressed back as if in answer to her thoughts.

Her bump was already noticeably bigger than it had been only fifteen hours ago when she'd first discovered it on the island only moments before Alice called. It pushed her thin cotton tank outwards to make her look at least three months pregnant, possibly more. It shouldn't be possible, but there was no denying the physical evidence that seemed to be demanding recognition.

It was probably a good thing Edward splurged on their travel arrangements or people were bound to have noticed her changing body during such a long flight. Especially when she drew attention to herself by continuously vomiting.

The baby nudged Bella's hand again, as if eager to remind her of its presence, where her palm was still cradling the rapidly expanding bump. Her breath caught in wonder at the connection she already felt with the tiny life.

The brief moment was interrupted all too abruptly as it earned a violent, startling hiss from Edward. He was glaring angrily at the place where her hands rested. It was the expression he'd worn when fighting Victoria in the clearing last spring. It was a look that had no business being directed at her child.

"Is the whole family coming to get us?" Bella asked once the jet had finished taxiing to the gate.

She stood, but vertigo had her clutching her seat as she failed to stand properly without support. The spinning room of the plane's main cabin was so nauseating that she dropped forward to dry heave in violent, body-racking spasms. There was nothing left in her system to actually come up at this point, however, not even bile. Edward's arms, looped delicately beneath her own, were the only reason she hadn't dropped to the floor like a ten-ton stone.

"Better?" he questioned once her shaking had diminished to mere shivers.

"I think so. Are they coming?" she repeated, needing to know the answer.

"Yes. But we'll have to wait until we get to the house before Carlisle can get a proper look at you. It's just a bit longer," Edward said, carefully leading her from the plane with a hand pressed lightly to the small of her back, guiding and ensuring she didn't collapse again. "He promised to acquire everything we'd need while we were on the way back. You don't need to worry for much longer. We'll have this taken care of by the end of the day," he reiterated, keeping up a constant stream of chatter as he lead Bella through the tiny airport to where the vehicles were lined up waiting to collect family and friends returning from their own trips.

Bella's eyes locked onto Rosalie the moment the statuesque blonde came into view. When Edward left her side to approach Carlisle and exchange words, Bella darted to her new sister-in-law seeking sanctuary and protection. Rosalie's arms encircled her at once, folding her into an embrace meant to both shield and offer comfort.

The relief was nearly palpable now that she had someone strong enough to take on Edward at her side. She'd never have been able to stop him from doing whatever he had planned on her own. If only he had just calmed down enough to listen to her, hear her out… But he was always so unreasonable when he was concerned about her welfare. Hopefully now that she had Rosalie he would pause long enough to see sense.

He had to. It was just too wrong to be against each other. He had to come around.

Everyone froze as they took in the unlikely duo. Rose had always been so vocal in her disapproval of Bella that it took a moment before the sight registered enough for anyone to comment.

"Rose?" Emmett asked curiously, stepping closer.

He'd been worried about Bella ever since they'd found out, but he hadn't expected Rose to be equally concerned. She hadn't mentioned anything on the way here, just insisted he drive her car. It should have been a tip off. She never let him drive her BMW.

Emmett only got one step before Edward tensed. "You called _her_?" Edward demanded of Bella. He looked dumbfounded, lost.

"Yes," she whispered, shirking into herself as though cowed by his censure.

It was agonizing to know she was upsetting him. It went against every promise she'd made to herself last spring. But it had to be done. There was no other choice.

"But w -" he started but broke off with a low growl, eyes flashing dangerously to Rosalie. She pushed Bella behind her so that Bella was sandwiched between herself and Emmett, and crouched defensively, ready to spring if Edward moved to reach Bella.

"Rosalie! Edward! Enough," Carlisle said sharply, eyes glancing around to assess how much the onlookers were taking in of his children's poorly timed dispute.

Luckily the municipal airport wasn't heavily trafficked and there were only three people outside watching them with interest. Carlisle's warning was enough to have Rosalie straightening, but she maintained her guarded stance.

"No. No," Edward denied, shaking his head. Bella could hardly breath. Dizziness made her head light as a balloon, and she could feel herself struggling just to inhale short, staccato puffs of air. "You can't possibly want to keep -"

"I think this is a conversation best had at home. Doesn't everyone agree?" Alice asked meaningfully.

"Yes," Carlisle agreed, ushering Edward towards his Mercedes. His son froze as he realized Bella was clinging to Rosalie, and moving towards her BMW instead of following him.

Bella hated that she was separating herself from Edward. It felt wrong, like deliberately severing a limb. But at the same time unavoidable, as though the part being amputated was infected with gangrene. A line had been drawn, and for once she and Edward weren't partners. It wasn't them against the world the way it was supposed to be when one tied oneself to another for eternity.

Worse, she hated that it was necessary. Without Rose to intercede on her behalf, she feared Edward might talk Carlisle into doing something drastic. Something irrevocable. Something that would destroy her child, and by extension, her. Now that this child existed, she knew she could not survive its loss.

"She's not going anywhere near you," Rosalie spat venomously.

"Edward, she's only escorting Bella back to the house. Let her go with Rose. It will give us a chance to speak on the way," Carlisle said soothingly. "Come," he commanded gently.

Bella whimpered helplessly as Rosalie helped her into the car. It felt like an out-of-body experience. She was taking everything in without really being a part of it. Her only tie to reality the increasingly frequent and sharper bumps against the inside of her abdomen.

"Jasper, you should go with Bella," Alice said, stopping him from sliding into the Mercedes beside her.

"Why?" Rosalie asked suspiciously.

"She's falling to pieces, Rose," Alice said, nodding to where Bella sat, still only halfway in the car. "That can't be healthy for the… fetus. Let Jasper help keep her calm," Alice explained sounding reasonable.

"I'll sit up front. You can ride in back with Bella," Jasper offered when Rosalie still hesitated. Bella reached out to touch Rose's arm. Her sister glanced down, took one look at the clammy, strained expression and caved.

The tense ride home was thankfully short, and relatively smooth, but every hairpin turn passed the blur of green had Bella resisting the urge to hurl. She did her best to breathe normally, but it was difficult to do as she broke down in sobs only seconds into the ride.

The car was almost immediately filled with consuming bubbles of calm tranquility that allowed her broken-faucet waterworks to transform into a slow dripping leak instead. The pain, while still present, was diminished to the equivalent of a blow from a hammer rather than a wrecking ball as well.

"He wants to kill our child," Bella whimpered, leaning into Rosalie's shoulder. Only Jasper's continuous efforts kept her from truly losing it at the realization.

"We won't let him," Rose vowed, running her fingers through Bella's messy hair. She hadn't brushed it since the night before her startling discovery and the snarls rivaled a ball of knotted yarn.

Rosalie distracted Bella from her worries by quizzing her on the specifics of her pregnancy thus far, lecturing her on taking proper care of herself, and actually giggling in delight when she got to feel the baby move for herself. It was strange seeing the usually disagreeable vampire demonstrate her maternal side.

Jasper spoke quietly from the front at one point, but Bella's inferior human ears missed his comment.

"What did you say, Jasper?" she asked quietly, uncertain if she actually wanted to know.

"You already love it. I can feel how much," he replied in his soft southern drawl. There was no judgement in his words, just acknowledgement of a truth that had already become a foundation of her very being.

"Of course!" Bella announced anyways when Emmett turned to glance at her. He looked troubled and uncertain, but he didn't say anything.

"She feels the way any expectant mother should feel," Rosalie added, patting Bella's hand as though they alone were aware of the secret and were daining to let others in on it.

Jasper didn't say any more, but he and Emmett exchanged looks that Bella couldn't interpret. There wouldn't have been time to ask even if she'd wanted to because suddenly she realized that they were pulling into the Cullens' drive.

Edward was out of the car, and at Bella's door before they'd even come to a complete stop. He looked demented, possessed. It terrified her. How was she supposed to bring him around to her way of thinking when he was obviously so irrational already?

"Don't worry," Jasper said, reaching back to brush his cool, stone fingers across her hand. He was out of the car and between her door and Edward before the temperature of his touch had even properly registered.

"What do you think you're doing?" Edward demanded, ending the words in a fierce growl.

"She's terrified. Back off, Edward," Jasper told his brother.

She appreciated his voicing his explanation. Most just thought their responses at Edward. Jasper had always been more considerate with her human deficiencies that meant she missed more than she'd like to. It was probably because he could actually feel her displeasure at being excluded.

Rose practically dragged Bella into the house, Emmett shadowing their steps the whole way. The rest of the family followed in behind, gathering in the family room by some unspoken agreement. Bella sank gratefully onto the sofa. She was so tired. Exhaustion threatened to drag her under despite the uneasy situation she was once again at the center of.

Edward tried to approach her, but Emmett moved to block his path. The largest Cullen crossed his arms over his chest and made it clear that Edward would have to go through him to get to Bella, and it would be an all out brawl if he decided to attempt it.

Frustrated, Edward turned on Carlisle. "You can fix her, can't you?" Edward pleaded, though it came across more as a demand.

"She's not broken," Rosalie fired off angrily.

"At the rate it's growing she will be!" Edward yelled, his frayed temper snapping. His hands clutched desperately at his head. Bella wasn't sure if it was because he was struggling to process the bombardment of his family's thoughts or if it was his own mind that he wished to silence.

"You can't know that," Bella insisted.

"Look at her, Carlisle. She's only a couple weeks at most, but she -"

"It is accelerating at an alarming rate," Carlisle acknowledged. "I don't believe the human body is equipped to handle such profound changes so quickly," he continued, frowning as he performed a visual assessment on Bella. Deep furrows etched themselves into his marble skin letting everyone know just how worried he truly was. "I'm sorry I didn't know to warn you. If I'd known… "

"See! Bella, you can't let that thing stay inside you another minute. It's going to kill you," Edward announced, vindication coating each unconscionable word.

"I'm strong enough. I know I am," Bella said stubbornly. She met his eyes, unflinching as fierce determination took root in the very depths of her soul.

This was one time where Edward's ability to mesmerize her would have no effect. There was no altering her from this chosen path. All she could do was see it through to the end.

"It's not a baby, Bella," Edward said condescendingly. "It's part me. It's a monster," he said, disdain positively dripping from the damning declaration.

"You're not a monster, and neither is our child." It was ridiculous to even consider something that resulted from their love could be evil. Edward was too perfect, too good. It was only her own weaknesses that she needed to fear having a negative effect on the child.

"Bella, Edward's right. We don't know what this is, but I can already see the damage it's inflicting on you. We need to hurry," Carlisle said, interrupting before Edward and she could continue debating when everyone already knew the result would be a stalemate. Neither of them would ever budge on their opinions of the other or themselves.

"Carlisle, no. It's her choice. Her right to decide," Esme said, resting her hand on Carlisle's arm and voicing her opinion for the first time since the newlyweds had returned.

"Esme… If her body is not compatible… "

"It's Bella's decision," she repeated firmly, and Carlisle nodded his agreement.

"I can't believe this!" Edward swore, throwing his arms up, and looking every inch the image of a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. "I knew I never should have agreed to your ridiculous stipulations. I never should have touched you," Edward groaned, oblivious to the pained blow his words dealt Bella.

"You don't mean that," Bella whispered, eyes round with alarm.

"This is all my fault. If I'd known… Jacob was right," he said, sounding tormented. Bella inhaled sharply. Jacob had said awful, untrue things at the wedding. Edward couldn't possibly be in agreement with him now. He shouldn't even be wasting his time remembering them. "I never should have touched you," he repeated, eyes closed on his tortured face.

"You regret being with me?" Bella asked, choking on the question and terrified to hear the answer.

"Yes! So much," he said fervently, and Bella barely even registered when he continued, "if this is the result."

"We belong together. It was perfect."

"I hate myself for being with you."

What she viewed as a transcendent act, a merging of their souls in addition to their bodies - because what else could have resulted in the creation of a new life - he viewed as his final act qualifying him for damnation.

A chasm tore open inside her. Pain, far worse even than when he left swamped her. It clung to her like lead weights attempting to drag her beneath the surface. Down, down into the endless murky depths until she drown. Her swiss cheese heart had only recently been mended and the compromised edges were too weak to hold together under the onslaught of his words.

"Stop, Edward. You're upsetting her," Jasper said, moving to stand behind the couch and reach to rest a hand on her shoulder.

Comfort and support immediately cocooned her, buffering her from the devastating thoughts and reality she found herself facing. Jasper's ability made it easier to breathe and battle against her husband on the most important issue ever to happen throughout the course of their eternity.

"You need to stay calm for the baby. Think of the baby, Bella," Rose murmured. The words did much to stop her anguish in its tracks. The baby was depending on her. She couldn't let her emotions put it at risk. Her pathetic human frailness would not endanger her child.

"Let's all calm down and let Carlisle exam her. Maybe it's not as bad as it seems," Alice added. She'd been unusually quiet throughout the discussion.

Bella looked to her, grateful for the support, but was surprised to see how diminished and haggard her sister looked. Alice looked nearly as wretched as Edward. Her face was scrunched, wrinkles creasing her forehead as though she was concentrating fiercely on something, and her shoulders were rounded, making her hunch in on herself. Concern bloomed in Bella's chest making her want to go to Alice at once, take her in her arms, and sooth her - Bella's own problems be damned.

"You can't see her future," Edward accused. Redirecting his fury towards his favorite sister. "Her future has vanished," Edward added to the room at large, each word a nearly indecipherable hiss.

"Yes," Alice admitted in a small tinkling voice. The high sound was clear, yet pained. "It's all gone. I can't see anything now."

"There's your proof, Bella. This will kill you," Edward said, launching the words like javelins meant to impale the precious cargo in her womb.

"We could always try changing her at the last minute. Most of you were nearly dead when Carlisle… " Alice tried to suggest, but broke off as if not trusting herself enough to even finish a thought. Never had she looked so much like a lost child seeking to reunite with her missing parents.

But she was right. They had all been on death's doorstep when Carlisle changed them. Esme had even already been presumed dead. The idea gave Bella hope, more than she'd already had that this was not only possible, but that it was certain to work out. Bella latched on and clung to the life-preserver tossed her way. She'd give birth to her baby then be changed into a vampire. She'd get everything she ever wanted and have an eternity of happiness.

Jasper's fingers brushed gently along her shoulder as he felt her growing hope. The light touch seemed like affirmation.

"Stop it, Alice. It'll kill her before we even get the chance," Edward insisted. "Don't give her false hope."

"I can do this. I know I can. I just need you to believe in me," Bella whispered in a small voice. Why did it seem like she was asking for the world from him? Demanding something impossible?

"No. No - this is insanity! How are any of you even remotely considering this?" Edward shouted before striding rapidly from the room much as he had when they'd voted on the issue of her becoming a vampire. And like that time, there was the crash of something being broken followed by a string of expletives.

"Come on, guys. You're starting to go around in circles here, and that isn't going to help anyone," Emmett said as Edward returned ready to start in on her again.

Emmett was right. Edward's argument wasn't changing. He wasn't offering up a valid reason not to go through with this, just repeating his unfounded, irrational fears again and again.

"Alice had a point. Carlisle needs to look her over before you get worked up unnecessarily, Edward," Esme pointed out.

"He's not touching her," Rose hissed, glaring at her father with distrust.

"What?" Bella asked, not understanding why Rose sounded so adamant about this. "Why can't he?"

"He'll kill the baby - for Edward," she explained.

Bella's breath caught in terror that Rosalie might be correct, and she inched closer to Rose and Jasper. Carlisle had already voiced his support of Edward's decision to terminate the pregnancy. What if he used the opportunity presented by the exam to do it? She wouldn't be strong enough to stop him. Her frail human body was no match, she was at his mercy. And if he acted before Rose could stop him, the end result would still be the same. Her baby would be dead.

The already erratic breaths she was managing to inhale came faster. She was hyperventilating even as her head shook in the negative to deny the possibility of someone trying to murder her son before he'd even had a chance to live.

"Rosalie," Carlisle breathed, obviously hurt that she'd think him capable of doing such a thing. He turned to Bella and continued, "I promise I will do nothing more than check the health of you and the fetus. I will not do anything against your will."

The marble hand on Bella's shoulder squeezed gently, projecting a sense of lethargy into her and helping calm her breathing enough that the black spots cleared from the edges of her vision when she began gulping down larger lungfuls of oxygen. The panic eased enough for her to recognize that the entire family was watching her in concern.

"He won't, Rose. I know he'd never abuse his power in such a way," Esme vowed. The look she directed at her husband following her words conveyed a shared knowledge of what would happen if he did. Carlisle nodded. "But it's important that he do what he can to keep both Bella and the baby healthy," she added, motherly concern apparent.

"All right then," Bella agreed, hesitantly.

She looked around the room uncertainly. Everything was backwards. Never had she imagined that she'd have cause to fear and distrust Edward and Carlisle. That it would be Rosalie and Jasper that sheltered her from harm. But Esme's words made sense, and Jasper's calming influence allowed her to think logically enough to know that it did need to be done - for the sake of the baby - but she was still scared of what he might do.

"Rose? You'll come with me?" Bella begged, reaching for her sister's waiting hand. Rosalie smiled reassuringly and helped her follow Carlisle.

Perhaps getting to see or hear the baby would help Edward come to terms with what was happening and help him to see that it was nothing more than a physical manifestation of their love for one another. Glancing down at the protruding bump resting heavily between her hips, Bella knew she had to be far enough along by now for an ultrasound to show that it was even starting to resemble a baby rather than a bean. She remembered that much at least from the middle school health class she'd taken in Phoenix.

"Edward do you -" she called from the bottom step to where he'd remained frozen, undergoing a staring match with Alice.

"You can't be serious," Edward said, expression contorted into disgust as he turned to stare at her. Bella flinched and retreated, backing up into the security of Rose's encircling arm.

As Rosalie ushered her from the room, Bella heard Jasper and Emmett herding Edward outside. The unmistakable sounds of things being destroyed echoed through the quiet house. Bella fervently hoped her husband was taking out his misplaced rage on the property and not his brothers. The last thing she wanted was for them to fight because of her. Or for someone to end up truly hurt over this.

Walking up the staircase, Bella just knew Carlisle would have used the time since finding out to create some elaborate and entirely unnecessary setup all for her. The thought made her cringe before she even entered the room to see that she was correct in her assumption.

His office was precisely what she dreaded finding. It looked exactly like an exam room at the hospital. The desk and bookshelves had been pushed aside to make room for some strange medical device on wheels with a screen and a larger machine with a mysterious function that Bella couldn't even hope to guess at. Carlisle was even waiting by what looked to be a padded exam table when they entered the room having moved much quicker than she was able to.

"Was all this really necessary?" Bella grumbled.

"Yes, actually," Carlisle replied with false lightness. "We don't know what to expect. I've never heard of this happening before. It's best to have anything I may need at our disposal if I'm to properly help you."

"Sorry," Bella mumbled, feeling sufficiently chastised. She longed for the day when she was no longer human and would stop being such a burden to the people she loved.

He began with the basics, questioning everything from the frequency of her and Edward's love making, to when Bella could pinpoint the first symptoms, to exactly which symptoms presented and when. Bella fought back her self-consciousness in order to answer every question as completely as possible. Her father-in-law's professional demeanor and Rosalie's soft urgings helped make the procedure a little less uncomfortable.

All the while Carlisle took notes, documenting everything she said. He'd likely have enough information to publish a thousand page book by the time he was done. Or at least it felt that way. She'd finally asked why he was even bothering to write anything when she knew he had perfect recall, and he said it was for her, in case she wanted to see the details for herself after her transition. Or in case this happened again to another vampire-human couple so he could share his research and help them through the process if possible.

Then he began the physical examination. It was mortifying when he announced that her breasts had already swelled over half a cup size. Actually they were nearly a full size bigger. She hadn't noted the increased tenderness in that area until the exam and now she was all too aware - as was the rest of the family. Edward had to have noticed the change during their last day or two, but he hadn't said a word. He was always too uncomfortable to mention such things. It was the same as when she was on her period.

"It's perfectly normal. To be expected really," Carlisle assured. "Now let's get an idea of the health of the fetus."

Carlisle was concerned over the hardness of her baby bump. He tried to keep his expression neutral, but Bella caught the flicker of unease that flashed when he touched it for the first time.

He prodded it a few times, eyes widening when her nudger greeted his grandfather. His hand paused, and his head tilted ever so slightly as he waited to feel the baby move again. The little man did not disappoint.

Carlisle's expression remained impassive as he measured the circumference of her belly and compared it to the measurement Alice reported from when she'd altered Bella's wedding dress.

"There. All done with that part," he said simply, turning to make a few notes on the chart he'd begun.

Bella wanted to ask what was wrong, and what he was thinking. She wanted to know if there was something wrong with her child - besides its unusual growth - and what Carlisle wasn't saying aloud. But she got distracted when he moved to pull the rolling screen towards her. An ultrasound machine, that's what it was. Finally she'd be able to see her son! Everyone would see that they were getting worked up earlier for no reason because it was just a baby.

How long would it be before Carlisle could confirm that it was the little boy from her dreams? The little boy with the perfect emerald eyes and wild bronze hair. The little carbon copy of his father.

The disappointment was raw and very, very real when the realization hit that the ultrasound wouldn't work. Carlisle seemed genuinely frustrated by it as well. It was odd to see the normally composed doctor so ruffled.

Bella tried not to let it get to her. Rose's encouraging explanation helped. "It's just because it's so well protected. The hard placenta is helping you keep it safe, Bella, since you're only human."

"It would help if I could get a sample of the amniotic fluid. That should provide -"

"That's dangerous for the baby," Rosalie said, moving to place herself between Bella and Carlisle.

"What? Why? I don't -"

"It could help us learn -"

"He wants to stick a needle in you, and take fluid from the sac surrounding the baby. But without an ultrasound, he could accidentally hurt the baby instead," Rosalie interrupted Carlisle to inform Bella.

"No! No, absolutely not. Carlisle, you can't," Bella said in a rush, clutching the back of Rose's shirt in an attempt to keep her in place as a shield.

"Calm yourself, Bella. I won't do it if you don't want me to. We should do a urine test, however. I trust you don't have a problem with that, Rosalie?" he asked in a chiding tone. "It's noninvasive."

Bella flushed the whole time she peed in the cup Carlisle provided and while he used the little test slip to analyze the hormone concentration. Everyone in the house was aware she required human moments, but this one seemed usually obvious since everyone was waiting on the results.

The relief was intense when Carlisle was finally ready to share his conclusions.

"Given your size and levels of hCG hormone, I'd say you're at roughly sixteen weeks. The levels were on the high end though, but that could just be a result of the fetus's accelerated rate of growth. Without an ultrasound to see the fetus's developmental stage it's difficult to be exact. Documenting the changes in your body over the next couple days should give us a better idea of how fast it is growing and the expected duration of your pregnancy."

"But it's healthy?" Bella asked.

"As far as I can tell," Carlisle said slowly. "I am concerned that you're not keeping anything down. With the changes your body is undergoing, it's more important than ever that you have the proper nutrients to sustain the alterations."

"Would you like to try eating again?" Rose asked. "I can make you something," she offered.

"I _am_ hungry," Bella admitted.

"You should have said something! We can't take care of you unless you keep us informed about how you're feeling."

"You guys don't need to bother -"

"The baby has needs, Bella," she chastised as they headed towards the kitchen. "You have to let us take care of you for the baby's sake," Rosalie argued, smiling smugly when Bella simply nodded in agreement and didn't protest further.

Edward was waiting for them in the kitchen. He looked furious, and more determined even than he had before the examination took place. Rosalie hissed angrily at the sight.

"What now, Edward? Going to stop her from eating until you get your way?"

Edward didn't acknowledge his sister, but a calculating gleam entered his onyx eyes. It was one Bella was all too familiar with from the many times he'd tried to make compromises with her. The same one he'd worn when presenting her with her "before" car, cell phone, and platinum credit card. It was the one he wore when he was confident that he was going to win an argument.

It chilled Bella to her very marrow to see him wearing it now, but she had to try anyways. This was too important. If he'd thought she was stubborn before, it was nothing compared to the fight he would get now if he tried to force her on this.

"Rose - Rose, I need to talk to him," Bella whispered, lightly touching Rosalie's arm. "Alone," she added.

Rosalie didn't move. Edward and she seemed to be competing in a silent battle. Tension built, thick and suffocating as it clouded the room like a foggy morning. Bella wrung her fingers nervously.

Finally Rosalie turned to go, promising, "I'll be right outside the door if you need me."

"Bella, please - please don't do this," Edward began the moment the door shut behind his sister. He moved forward to take her hands, unknotting her fingers and lacing them through his own.

"I have to," Bella said, resolve firm even in the face of his agonized pleading.

"No you don't!" he screamed, roughly jerking his hands away and turning to knock the decorative bowl of fruit off the counter. The metal clanged loudly when it impacted with the fridge, and Bella jumped at the sound.

Slowly she took a few breaths, attempting to slow her racing heart as she watched Edward falling to pieces before her very eyes. It wretched her mended heart, the scars from the previous hurts stretching painfully. Frustrated, she felt the hated yet familiar burning sting in the back of her eyes.

Great. She was going to start crying again. Just great!

"You'll see. We'll be a happy family. Once our baby is born -"

"You'll die. You won't be around to see the monster you're insisting on dying over," he said bitterly.

"Stop saying that," Bella said, sobs breaking free. Warm tears began flowing freely down her face. She swiped at them angrily, but there were more to replace them making it a useless effort.

"How did I not see - how did I not realize you'd want this - _this abomination?_" Edward asked, almost to himself.

"Edward!" Bella gasped. "We created this baby together. Nothing coming from our love could ever be an abomination," Bella cried defensively, still furtively trying to stem the flow of tears.

Jasper entered then, hovering near the door, but using his gift to project serenity into the room and ease the mounting tension that had only escalated with Rosalie's departure. His presence was the only reason she was able to continue her conversation with Edward. If left to handle it on her own, she'd have crumpled into a heap of broken glass upon hearing Edward's pronouncement.

"I won't sit here and watch you die," Edward said. There was something new in his expression, in his stance. He was still, a stone column of unbreakable resolve as he faced off with her.

"I'm not going to die. You told me that when Esme -"

"It's not the same thing," Edward said, brushing her words aside like an annoying fly buzzing about his head.

"It is."

"As long as you're _pregnant_," he spat the word like it was the most foul curse, "you'll die. And I won't watch that happen."

"But I am pregnant. And that's not changing until I give birth," Bella said quietly, not understanding why he still wore that calculating look. It made her uneasy. "So where does that leave us?"

"I already told you. I can endure a great deal where you're concerned. But I can't handle you letting yourself die when there's an alternative available. I won't watch this happen."

Understanding came, clear as a cloudless day, and suddenly she knew what he planned to do.

"Are - are you threatening to leave if I don't let Carlisle kill our baby?"

"Yes."

"No, Edward," Bella said, numbness sweeping through her and making it impossible to move or sense her surroundings. "You promised you wouldn't leave again. You swore to me! I _married_ you."

"We promised forever," he agreed. Then he looked Bella straight in the eye and said, "You're the one going back on your promise." He looked confident, as though already assured of his victory.

"I'm not," she breathed, the words barely audible to her ears yet she knew he'd have no problem hearing her.

"Bella, I'll stay with you forever. All you have to do is get rid of _that_," he said, jabbing a sharp, accusatory finger towards her midsection.

The ultimatum had barely left Edward's beautiful lips before Bella responded. "Never," she vowed fiercely, feeling an almost vampiric surge of possession engulf her.

He looked momentarily confused, disoriented. As if he was an actor in the middle of a scene, and just been handed a new script where his character abruptly dies rather than triumphs. He readjusted quickly - much quicker than her - his mind processing things a million times faster than she could hope to. Then he nodded.

"Goodbye," he said simply, turning and ghosting from the room.

"Edward!" Bella screamed, moving to follow, but tripping over the scattered fruit still littering the floor from Edward's earlier outburst.

She faltered, stumbling a bit as she screamed for Edward once more. Her legs collapsed out from beneath her.

Then cool arms were lifting her. Bella stared, nearly unseeing, into the concerned face of Jasper. He cradled her gently against his chest as he carried her back to the couch in the living room. Her mind processed the stunned faces of the rest of the family gathered close as they passed them, but her mind was nearly consumed with one single fact.

"He left me - again," she gasped, heart shredding apart as if blasted with a sawed-off shotgun.

The black emptiness was a welcome relief, and Bella greeted it eagerly when it washed over her, dragging her down, down, where nothing could touch her - however, temporarily.


	3. 3: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 3 - Jasper

The family was in shock. Jasper sensed the numbness emanating off of everyone. He didn't know quite what to think or how to help as he laid Bella's unconscious form down on the sofa. Her mind had apparently decided to enter survival mode and had shut down to protect itself from the reality of the situation. It was nice to learn she wasn't entirely without some self-preservation instincts. Jasper had been beginning to wonder.

Rosalie was the first to regain her composure and respond, rushing to Bella's side and practically shoving Jasper out of the way as she fussed over her. He felt the concern radiating from the blonde, potent and extreme. The undertones of elation and anticipation captured his attention momentarily though. He watched as she covered Bella with the thick throw blanket from the back of the couch, tucking the edges securely around the still girl while contemplating her motivations as was his habit.

"Alice, where's he going?" Carlisle asked urgently as he bent to check Bella's vitals.

Carlisle was terrified his impulsive, petulant son was about to do something drastic once more. But Jasper had felt Edward's emotions prior to his departure, and they were not those of someone driven by despair. He was hurt, angry, confused.

If Jasper had to guess - and years of practice meant he usually guessed correctly, especially as far as his family was concerned - he'd bet Edward was struggling to come to terms with the situation while also still trying to force Bella's hand. He was regrouping, planning new strategies to get his way, and hoping that his leaving would be enough to change her mind. But more than anything, he was hurt that she hadn't picked him above all else. It wasn't a decision he could comprehend. Not after everything they'd gone through to get to this point. For Edward, Bella came first. End of story. But Bella had just proven the same was not true in reverse. Despite her always having insisted it was. Edward wasn't mature enough to understand how this event changed things.

Jasper sighed, contemplated sharing his thoughts, but ultimately decided not to. No one would likely agree with Edward's reasoning, not with the impact it was having on Bella, and it would help no one to have the family angry with Edward. Just now Edward was every bit the angsty teenage boy he'd been when turned, ruled by his hormones and raging against the things he found unjust and unfair. Hopefully he figured things out quickly and returned before he did too much damage.

"I-I don't know," Alice answered, shaking her head helplessly. Jasper went to her at once, hugging his wife as she curled in on herself. "I can't see him," she complained, voice small and strained as she explained. "His future is too wrapped up in Bella's and hers is… "

There was no need to say more. Everyone already understood that Bella's future was as predictable as a natural disaster.

"Should I try to go after him?" Emmett asked, glancing around.

His emotions were always so simple to interpret - love, worry, happiness. Their lack of complexity was refreshing, and all the more appreciated for their genuine sincerity. Jasper had always gravitated towards positive emotions, and Emmett's were some of the easiest to endure on a continual basis.

"You won't find him," Alice announced seconds later, pulling away from Jasper and moving to the center of the room. She sounded certain and it seemed that being able to share at least this much with her family had helped her regain her composure at least a little. "We'll just have to wait until he decides to come back and look after Bella in the meantime."

* * *

The next two days passed in a blur. Bella remained unconscious for nearly thirteen hours. Carlisle insisted everyone let her sleep, saying the pregnancy and stress had likely taxed her system, and rest would be the best thing for her.

When she did finally wake, Rosalie practically force fed her. Bella was a zombie as she ate. Jasper concentrated on keeping her emotions level, and for about an hour it worked. Then, before too long, Bella's attempt at nonchalance faltered, and most of the food came right back up.

Rosalie held a bucket she'd prepared for Bella and soothed the expectant mother, ensuring her that morning sickness was normal and nothing to be embarrassed over. She'd even gone so far as to wipe Bella's face with a damp cloth as if Bella was the baby.

Em had watched with a perplexed expression, but underlying that was fear. He was terrified - more than any of the others - and helpless. His strength was useless. There was a fake smile on his face whenever Bella glanced at him, but it failed to register with her that it was just a mask.

After the second time Bella expelled the contents of her stomach Emmett baulked and retired from the room. Once Bella had drifted off again, Jasper sought his brother out only to find him searching the internet for information, scouring every source he could think to look for.

"Bella can't be the first one this has ever happened to," Em muttered, not looking away from the screen.

"I've never heard -"

"You wouldn't. You spent your years fighting not fucking," Emmett interrupted impatiently.

Jasper didn't bother to correct the mistaken assumption. He had been Maria's toy nearly the entire time. There had been nearly as much sex as blood and fighting. It had been a life centered around hedonistic pursuits, and it was not a time in his life that he enjoyed looking back on. The way he'd let himself be used unsettled him. It was a source of deep shame and lasting resentment. Only Alice, and Edward, truly understood the extent of his experience in the south and how it had come to define his limitations in this newly chosen life.

"Carlisle hasn't either," Jasper reminded his brother, letting the conversation shift naturally away from him.

"He's too noble," Emmett argued. Jasper sensed that he needed this. Needed to be doing something, anything, to help.

"I have my history books. I'll see if I can locate any hidden clues that may have been glossed over or misinterpreted," Jasper offered, turning to leave Emmett in peace.

"Thanks, Jazz."

"I'll help Em. You should stay near Bella though - in case something sets her off again. I think you'd be better for her than the drugs Carlisle is contemplating using to sedate her," Alice said, skipping lightly into the room. Her fingers briefly touched the back of his hand as she passed.

"If you think that's best," Jasper agreed. He always trusted Alice's suggestions. She'd never steered him wrong, and wouldn't recommend he stay near Bella now if he would end up being a threat or if it wasn't what Bella needed.

Once he'd retrieved a number of thick, ancient volumes from the room he shared with Alice, Jasper returned to his former spot on the bottom step of the stairs. It appeared that the family room was going to be Bella's room for the duration of her pregnancy - however short that might turn out to be.

She'd thrown up again, not even waking fully to do so. It was rather disgusting, but the noxious, acidic smell of vomit made it easier to remain in the same room with her, even if he was in the corner farthest from her. Bella shifted restlessly, whimpering slightly. Rosalie glanced at him pointedly as she tucked the covers around her ill patient. With a roll of his eyes, Jasper layered the room with tranquility, drowsiness, and acceptance.

As the second day since her return came to a close, Bella woke asking for Edward. "It was just a dream," she croaked, barely audible as realization dawned. "He's really gone." The memory of his abandonment seemed to slam into her with a vengeance and it took the combined efforts of Rose's words and Jasper's gift to settle her.

Edward had always been prone to theatrics. But this was absurd. Bella needed his support and he'd abandoned her - again.

She was a disaster. The stress only adding additional strain to her already overly taxed body. Yet she never wavered from her chosen course. It was… admirable. He'd known Bella for over a year now and still she managed to surprise him with her strength of will. He'd forgotten humans were capable of such conviction.

For the next couple days only Rose's warnings that Bella had to take care of herself for the baby had any impact. It was the reason Bella continued to at least try eating. Not that it did any good. Everything came right back up. At first it usually stayed down for at least an hour. Not anymore. Now she was lucky if her body had ten minutes to process what it needed and absorb some of the necessary subsistence.

Alice continued searching for Edward as well as answers. His departure had been a spur of the moment decision, so she only saw a brief flash when he decided to stop. Everyone was very careful not to mention him when Bella was awake, but during one of Bella's brief naps, Alice told the family the news that he was in a dark room, curled up in a ball, unmoving. The blackness prevented her from being able to isolate his location so someone could track down the drama queen and drag him home to his distraught wife.

A few times Bella's sanity seemed stretched thin as tissue paper, and Jasper had used his gift to help her sleep through the worst of her thoughts and depression. Each time he did, she'd glare at him upon waking, and mutter about pushy, manipulative vampires. Then Rosalie would start in on how it had helped keep the baby from getting too distressed and Bella would let it go. This happened several times before Bella was capable of remaining awake without the need of vampire sedation.

Carlisle continuously monitored the pregnancy while Bella slept. The depth of his worry increased with each examination. Jasper didn't need to be a doctor to see the toll the changes were demanding of Bella.

It was alarming how he was able to see her stomach growing. Shocking to watch her hair fade, the nutrients leached from the once vibrant mahogany until it was left a lank brown the color of over-harvested dirt. Terrifying to realize her skin had become shrink wrap over brittle bones once every extra ounce of softness was consumed from her body. And frightening to hear her heart beat faster each day as it struggled to keep up with the increasingly impossible demands of her condition.

Then the first bruise appeared.

As Bella's strength was sapped, so was the child's, but not proportionally. At least not when compared to the weak human incubator it was nestled within. It was too strong. Each time it moved, it pushed too hard against Bella's fragile skin leaving angry violet and indigo marks.

Carlisle was in the middle of his second exam of the day when it happened the first time. Bella had just stood to follow the doctor, with Rose's overbearing help, when she gasped and pressed a hand to her middle.

Pain flowed like a river swiftly sucking him into its current. Jasper's eyes closed against the onslaught of the oppressive emotion. Pain always triggered his thirst. It would forever be linked to the desperation he felt to quench the aching, dry burn of his throat. Along with the anticipatory knowledge that blood was the reward for enduring pain during battle. It was an involuntary reaction and one he could not help - not after nearly a hundred years of conditioning.

When Carlisle crouched to see the damage, his horror had Jasper snapping to attention, searching for the source before he too saw the evidence maring Bella's flesh stretched tautly over her ballooning bulge. Again he was grateful that the constant vomiting tainted the appealing smell of her blood so close to escaping her insufficient skin wrapping.

"It doesn't hurt. The baby is strong," Bella said lightly, brushing off Rose and Carlisle's concern, but Jasper could feel her pain intensify as she spoke, as well as her… joy. Curious.

"Rose, can you get an ice pack? And the vitamin K and C cream from my office," Carlisle requested, offering his shoulder for Bella to lean against. He looked up from his exam to explain, "It should help reduce the inflammation and pain."

Jasper moved closer, intrigued by her emotions. Bella tottered and fresh waves of pain formed, but Bella fought to keep her expression from relieving what was happening. Her poker face was pitiful, ridiculously ineffective. Despite her attempt at neutrality when suffering, her joy remained undiluted.

"That's a good thing?" Jasper asked, adding, "That it's strong." Bella startled, having not noticed his approach, and he immediately moved to steady her by wrapping a supporting arm around her bony shoulders.

"Yes. It will fit in with it's supernatural fam - AHHHH!" Bella cried out, clutching her belly where he watched as a second bruise formed. It was like watching drops of ink being spilled across pristine ivory paper.

Jasper reached out instinctively, lightly touching the tender softness of her skin and releasing soothing ripples into her.

"Oh!" Bella exclaimed, and almost at once he felt her emotions shift from pain to welcome relief. Carlisle, who'd been attempting to measure her latest growth while waiting for Rosalie to return, starred up from Bella's feet in shocked amazement.

"Jasper, what are you doing to her?" Rosalie demanded as she breezed back into the room and straight to Bella's other side.

"He got the baby to settle down," Bella replied, looking wonderingly up at him, gratitude gleaming in her sunken, bruised eyes. "It was restless and kicking, but now it's calm."

Jasper had never in his very long life had cause for anyone to look at him with such trust and hope. Most definitely not a human, his natural prey. Those usually only gave him imploring looks before he inflicted agony and death. He felt an unexpected piece of his brain lock into place when Bella did so now, but he paid it no mind.

One part of his mind was focused on continuing to provide relief to Bella and her child, while another was remembering how even Alice had been more exasperated over waiting so long than grateful when he first met her in the diner so long ago. And there had been that infinitesimal flinch that she'd been unable to repress when she'd first laid eyes on his numerous scars. He hadn't thought anything of it - everyone flinched at the sight of him. They recognized how dangerous he was. It was instinct. And Alice's reaction had been so muted compared to what he was used to.

But Bella showed not an ounce of fear now, just trust and… acceptance. Yes, there was a knowing in her emotions. He tasted it. She knew she could rely on him for help. How very peculiar given everything they'd been through.

It was intoxicating. Addictive.

After that Jasper was glued to Bella's side, one hand conformed to the contour of her swollen belly. A constant stream of tranquility to keep the baby as still as possible flowed from him to her womb.

The new peace seemed to buoy Bella. It restored her initial hope and confidence that she could handle this. And it did appear to be a little easier for her though she still couldn't keep any food down. At least with his help she slept easier, and the dark circles rimming her eyes were reduced to only a slight redness.

When Bella was awake, the family took turns occupying her to keep her mind off Edward and help reduce her stress levels.

Mostly Bella asked for stories from the family's various adventures as vampires when they'd come down to sit with her. Something to look forward to she'd said. Everyone obliged her, and for once Edward wasn't around insisting the family censor themselves so as not to scare her. Jasper always thought it was a bit ridiculous. She knew what they were, and had seen them attack others of their kind. If that wasn't enough to scare her off, nothing would. Hell, it just seemed to make her more determined to become one of them. Better she be forewarned than have to learn the hard way through experience. He wished someone had been around to warn him.

The family did other things to help as well. Rose and Alice shopped online for baby stuff. They insisted on buying stuff for both a boy and a girl since they didn't know which she was having. Each time one of the girls mentioned the gender Bella would blush and emit a strong sense of nostalgia. It made Jasper curious, but he refrained from asking to avoid upsetting her if it had something to do with Edward.

Esme offered advice on being a parent. This was actually Bella's favorite judging by her emotions. Jasper supposed it was because Esme was speaking as if it was a sure thing that Bella would be around to raise her child.

Carlisle offered updates about her pregnancy. As well as information about what was happening to her body and the baby's - at least as far as he could tell from the limited tests Rose allowed him to perform.

Emmett and Jasper competed at video games with her watching and egging them on since movies and music only seemed to upset her.

Alice had just joined them before the brothers were set to race Mario Karts. Jasper noticed she was frowning at the screen. Her forehead was scrunched just above her nose and extreme irritation surrounded her like cotton candy.

"Alice can't see who wins," Jasper announced suddenly, failing to hide his smile when his partner aimed her angriest scowl at him. He was highly amused by the unfamiliar predicament Alice was finding herself in blinded as she was. "Bella, have you ever wanted to bet against her?"

"No, actually," she whispered. Her voice had grown weaker in the last few hours, her throat raw from the near constant vomiting. But Jasper sensed the anticipation that she felt yet couldn't convey in her weakened state.

"Even after all those times she made you play life-size Barbie?" Jasper teased, tempting her to take the bait.

"Traitor!" Alice hissed, glaring playfully at Jasper. "Fine. I _think_ Emmett will annihilate you," Alice taunted.

"That's okay, Bella's got my back," Jasper replied easily.

"Yes," Alice agreed.

Jasper felt a flash of something spike from her, but it was there and gone before he could process it. That was one of the limitations of his gift. Vampires may have perfect recall, and he could remember any emotion a person felt once he'd decoded it… but if it vanished before he had a chance to properly dissect and identify it, he'd never know what it was. And Alice had become very good at hiding her emotions from him after all of their years together when she wanted to.

"What's the bet?" Bella asked, shifting against his side. His one hand followed her movements easily while the other helped her readjust. In just a couple days he'd learned to anticipate her needs.

Alice watched them impassively, contemplating some complex problem. Then she spoke quick and light as ever. "If you win, then I will forgive you for one slight or grievance."

"Forgive me?" Bella asked uncertainly.

"We're going to be sisters for a very, very long time. We're bound to disagree at some point, and I'm telling you now that I will let it go," Alice offered magnanimously, a serene smile ghosting her lips.

Bella chuckled weakly and said, "Okay, Alice. And if you win?"

"You have to let me take you shopping once you're past your newborn stage," she announced, excitedly bouncing at the prospect. Bella groaned, though it came out more as a croak.

"Jasper, don't lose," Bella muttered.

"Yes, ma'am," he vowed in an over exaggeration of his drawl, grinning at her. "I'll win with just one hand."

In the end it was no contest. Jasper slaughtered Emmett.

* * *

When the family wasn't with Bella, they were researching. Nothing had turned up so far, but they kept looking.

Jasper had taken to researching while sitting with Bella. Emmett wasn't having much luck on the internet, but Jasper had found a few passages in a book about the rise and fall of the Mayan empire that seemed promising. Esme had gone to the library to find more books on the subject as well as ones on the Ticuna legends.

Edward had been gone for six days now, and no one was any closer to figuring out a way to help Bella.

The presence of a new emotion startled Jasper from his reading moments after Bella laughed at whatever asinine thing Em was saying to her this morning.

"Bella, laugh again," Jasper commanded.

She did, and despite it's forced nature, he felt it. Joy. Not her own, but the fe - baby's.

He scooted closer, sliding his other hand over the surface of her belly tenderly. She shivered, watching him. Her brow was furrowed and he sensed her curiosity and confusion.

"Bella," he whispered, glancing up in awe.

"What? What is it, Jasper?" Bella demanded, uncertain and worried that he'd sensed something wrong with her child. She jerked and winced, rubbing her side.

"Wow, careful. I can feel the baby's emotions," he breathed.

"Seriously?" Em asked at the same time Bella spoke.

"You can?" she said, biting her lip and covering his hands with her own.

Neither acknowledged Emmett, too lost in their shared revelation to pay him any heed.

There weren't words to explain the strangeness of having a human voluntarily touch Jasper. Add the fact that she never portrayed a hint of fear or hesitancy, he was afraid he could easily become addicted to such open acceptance. What a joke! He already craved it if he was honest with himself.

He felt another link clip into place in his brain as her fingers exploringly traced over the ridges of his own. Once more he pushed the unfamiliar sensation and knowledge to the back of his mind, ignoring the implications.

That was one of his largest problems. Addiction. After nearly a century of instant gratification, he found it next to impossible to restrain himself when something was offered freely. Particularly if that something promised any sort of pleasure or happiness.

Just now Bella was so happy and excited that he wished to immerse himself in the emotions. To roll around in them like a kitten would with catnip.

"Yes," Jasper said, smiling softly up at her. "It likes it when you laugh." The first true smile since the wedding stretched across Bella's gaunt face.

Until that point, Jasper had been weary of the baby. He didn't like the havoc it was causing within the family. He didn't like that it put Bella's life at risk and made Alice worry. He didn't like the uncertainty or the potential threat it was for his family. Jasper could not tolerate anything that threatened the safety of his family.

The baby was an abstract concept before this moment. Something elusive and undefined despite the physical evidence presented by Bella's body. Now it was real. Every bit a person to him the way Bella had become. He could no more view it as a danger than he could consider trying to take a bite out of Bella again.

"How much can you sense?" Carlisle asked. The words snapped Jasper to attention. He mentally berated himself for letting his guard down to such an extent that he hadn't detected Carlisle's presence until he was right behind him. Never had he been so utterly distracted before. "How developed is it?"

"The baby loves Bella," Jasper said, recovering quickly. "It loves her every bit as much as she loves it. The baby can tell," Jasper explained, head tilting as he assessed and processed.

"Of course we love each other. We're a family," Bella crooned to her stomach.

"It didn't mean to hurt you a moment ago," he added. "You scared it, and it jerked in surprise."

"No. The baby's all warm and safe. It would never deliberately try to hurt me. I'm just too weak," Bella said, excusing the baby's inadvertent actions.

"You aren't. You're strong enough to do this," Jasper said, projecting confidence to everyone in the room.

"Do you really think so?" Bella asked in her wavering and scratchy voice.

"Yes. I've seen you do brave and incredible things. Truly remarkable things. I feel your determination now. I know you'll surprise everyone," Jasper said, knowing Bella would see the conviction burning in his eyes.

"You're the first person - aside from Rose, and well… "

"She does want you to survive," Jasper informed Bella. Sampling the shock it produced like it was a sweet wine and he was at a tasting.

"W-what?"

"If you were concerned about her motivations. You know I can sense emotions, but that doesn't always mean I understand the reasons behind them. I confronted her yesterday," Jasper admitted. "While you were sleeping."

"Hey! Not cool, bro!" Emmett called indignantly as he leaned over Bella to smack Jasper upside the head. He hadn't touched Bella, but her breath caught regardless. The slightest jostle seemed to rile up the baby and unintentionally hurt her.

"Emmett," Carlisle warned, heading back upstairs. "I need to check, but… This development helps narrow down how advanced the fetus is. It might mean we'd be able to act sooner… Might make a difference for -"

Emmett took one more look at Bella, regret over the discomfort he realized his impulsive action caused her and fear at the sight of her skeletal face bursting from him, then hurried after Carlisle.

"You talked to Rose?" Bella prompted once Carlisle and Emmett were gone.

"Yes. She doesn't want the baby for herself. She wants you both to survive," Jasper revealed. "You're surprised. If it came down to a choice, she'd choose the child over you. But you would do the same."

"Yes, I would," Bella confirmed. She'd already proven it by picking the child over Edward. Over the one she'd honestly believed she couldn't be happy without. Couldn't survive without. Amazing how circumstances change things.

"She knows that. She doesn't want her relationship with the child… tainted… by your death, so she wants you to live. And she appreciates the trust you've placed in her with something so important to you," Jasper continued. "I do too," he added after a moment.

"Jasper… you're a protector. It's who you are, so of course I trust you," Bella said easily, as if she hadn't just offered him her overwhelming, life-altering faith. "I remember the story you told me about becoming a _vampire_," she explained, rolling her eyes on the last word. He knew she still felt silly saying the word. She'd always had such a peculiar reaction to the term even if she didn't to the reality of them.

"What about it?" he asked cautiously.

"You were only turned because you stopped to help those three women. And when the newborns attacked, you helped get everyone ready - then got bit trying to look out for everyone," she said in her frail, raspy voice. Every word strained it just a little bit more.

"I suppose I assumed that after your birthday… "

Jasper didn't like remembering Bella's birthday. He hadn't really gotten over what he'd done, how he'd nearly killed her. It had all happened so fast. He'd been caught off guard. He'd lost himself in the moment. Then it was over and the haze of bloodlust cleared long enough for him to realize the full impact of his actions.

It still shocked him. The… event. There'd been no fantasy of slowly sinking his teeth into the soft skin of her neck. No careful plan of how to approach her and savor her warmth. No calculation of how to avoid inciting fear for as long as possible so he could enjoy the taste without terror ruining the experience. Instead, it was all action and fury - snapping teeth, snarling, and a flood of venom choking him. The monster within had been in complete control for the first time in decades.

He'd taken off immediately, desperate to get as far away from temptation as possible. He'd run, and run. There wasn't a distance great enough to outrun the demons in his own head. The demons constantly screaming, demanding blood. Blood. Blood. And more blood. He was a vampire. It was his nature. He wasn't always strong enough to withstand temptation.

How easy it was to be frustrated and angry with Edward for running when he'd done the same. What a hypocrite he was. Pathetic.

Alice had found him hours later, and promised that no permanent damage had been done. Then they'd learned of Edward's plan to move the family and leave Bella behind. He hadn't gotten the opportunity to apologize. He felt cowardly, but part of him was relieved not to have to face her again. He didn't think he could stand to look in her face and see that he'd destroyed the trust she'd so willingly placed in him.

"I trust you. I don't blame you for that. I never did. It wasn't your fault. I was the clumsy, weak human that caught you off guard in the place you're supposed to be able to lower your defenses in," Bella swore, taking the blame onto herself as she'd always been prone to do. Jasper had witnessed enough of her arguments with Edward to know it would be a waste of time to argue with her over it.

"I still regret it," he confessed, letting his head fall forward in shame, unable to look Bella in the eye as he voiced his apology for the first time. "I'm so -"

"Don't," she insisted, gripping his hand with what was probably all the strength she still possessed.

"I don't think it would happen again - now that I know you better. My control around you is stronger. I'm less sensitive to your blood. And you mean too much to me and the family," Jasper said, trying to reassure Bella that she was safe from him. He knew she wasn't worried, but he still felt the need to say the words aloud.

"Thanks. While we're on the subject though… " she began haltingly. She swallowed, and nervousness billowed outward. "Would you promise me something?"

"Of course," Jasper said, interested to know what she'd want.

"If I don't make it - just hear me out," she insisted when she saw his frown, "- if I don't, please listen - Jasper, promise me that you'll always look after him," she begged, stopping Jasper when he'd tried to interrupt and deny the possibility of her not surviving the child as a vampire at the very least.

A word snagged his attention. "Him?" Bella thought it was a boy. So that was why she'd been embarrassed when Alice and Rose mentioned genders.

"Just a hunch," she whispered shyly. "Will you?" she asked with surprising determination.

"Even if the child is more like you than Edward? More human… you'd trust me with his safety?" Jasper asked, stunned. He felt a burning need for her to be certain of this request. It blazed hotter than the ever present flames in his throat. More words flowed from his lips, ensuring she understood all that she was asking. "Even knowing my history, knowing how many I've killed, knowing I'm dangerous? Even knowing that I once tried to kill you, and would have if the family hadn't stopped me?"

"Always. I will always trust you with him," Bella said without hesitating, conviction clear in her sincere brown eyes. "You'd do a better job than anyone else."

Such unconditional faith was potent. Profound. Had anyone ever trusted him so completely before? Even Alice was constantly checking the future to ensure he wasn't about to slip up. It was an unintentional, yet nonetheless festering, wound she inflicted daily that he'd forced himself to learn to cope with over the years in order to be part of the family. It was part of his atonement for the countless sins and evil deeds he'd committed.

Another link. There was another link clicking into place in his head, tying him to Bella and her child. This one unbreakable titanium, chromium, diamond. More durable than all of those substances. A link that refused to be ignored as he felt an odd shift that trickled down to the very foundation of his essence. An undeniable change in his nature. One of those so rare to happen in his kind.

"Then I swear he'll always have my protection. Forever."

Their eyes locked and Bella's relief was a balm to his tattered humanity after Maria's abuse and the guilt over all of his own actions. Alice had picked up the shreds of it, working to hold them together over the years, but this fragile human - one he'd once considered insignificant and expendable - was actually managing to repair it and make it whole again.

Jane was right when she said Bella brought out strong reactions in their kind. It was… astonishing.

A slight movement at the edge of the room caught Jasper's attention. Alice was watching them, a small smile curving her lips though he sensed nothing of what she was feeling. It was… unusual. She rarely hid her feelings from him. Though she was certainly capable.

"Bella, I need to steal Jasper for a bit," Alice said, voice tinkling merrily. Then he felt it. Agony. Sharp and cutting. Her pain pierced him for an instant then it was gone.

Jasper was at Alice's side in the time it took Bella to blink. Alice continued to watch Bella, and Jasper could see the tightness to her features, the forced nature of the smile. Little things Bella wouldn't be able to detect. Being beside his wife now, Alice couldn't completely contain her concern. The pain made sense now. She was afraid of losing Bella. It must be eating her up to not know the outcome and not be able to help.

"Oh. Of course," Bella said, disoriented from suddenly finding herself alone on the sofa.

"Esme and Rosalie just got back. It's our time to hunt," Alice explained, then promised, "We'll be back soon though."

Bella nodded as Rose came to take Jasper's place at her side.

* * *

They'd barely left the house before Alice paused, pulling her cell out and dialing quickly.

"Charlie's planning to come by and see if we've heard from them. You should call and tell him Bella's sick - quarantined. It will start preparing him," Alice informed the person on the other end.

"Should we let her talk to him?" Carlisle's voice sounded from the speaker in Alice's phone.

"No - I don't… no," Alice said uncertainly. Another wave of pain reached Jasper. "Do what you think is best, Carlisle," Alice finally concluded, hanging up. Jasper hated that he couldn't help her with her faulty gift. She was holding up better than he expected, but he knew it had to be making her suffer more than she was letting on.

Without a word of explanation, they continued moving silently through the forest, each intent on the hunt and absorbed in their own worries.

Alice made neat work of a couple of deer. They each had their own hunting style, but her style resembled the strike of a cobra - quick, unexpected, and lethal. The graceful strike was mesmerizing to watch. He'd always enjoyed watching her.

Jasper, by contrast, was aggressive, dominant. He'd stalk his prey then force it to submit before devouring it. The prolonged hunt heightened his instincts and made the thrill of drinking that much more satisfying. Took a little of the disappointment of only drinking animal blood away.

He'd taken down four before he approached Alice, pinning her against a tree and kissing her. His lips left hers to trace down the slim column of her neck, nipping and sucking lightly. The buttons of her shirt came easily undone as his hand slid between them.

"We should be getting back," Alice said, slipping from his arms with her lithe dancer grace. Her shirt was adjusted before she turned back to face him.

She'd never denied him before. Never. She'd always understood that Maria had conditioned him to associate feeding and sex. After nearly a century with her, and several decades with Alice, he wasn't able to differentiate between the two pleasures and always sought one after the other when they went out together.

Desire and passion were magnified thanks to his gift and he struggled to reign them in when he was used to satiating them. It had been weeks since they hunted together. Weeks since they'd been intimate actually.

"You're keeping things from me," Jasper accused, hurt by her unexplained rejection, and struggling to focus on something else as he marshalled his senses and subdued his arousal.

"I know," she said, and he was relieved that at least she wasn't denying it. "I'm sorry."

He waited for her to say more, explain. She didn't speak, just stared into the distance watching some event unfold that he wasn't privy to.

"You're not going to tell me now, are you?"

"I promise when I know more," she said, looking up at him from her significantly shorter height. Again he felt her pain. There was confusion too. Regret and grief as well. Was it all because she couldn't see? Because she didn't know? "I will," she promised more firmly, and turned away to keep him from asking more just yet.

He studied her retreating back and lightly said, "You don't always have to know everything, Alice. It might even make things more interesting if you don't." He hoped to tease her into a better mood or relieve some of the pressure she was putting on herself.

She cocked her head to the side, considering.

"Alice, I was teasing," Jasper tried, needing her to say something or at least look at him.

"Yes," she said slowly and paused, waiting for him to come to her. "I know you were." She laughed lightly then winced, reaching to rub her temple.

"How's your head?"

"Hurts," she replied, shrugging helplessly.

"Tell me what I can do to help," Jasper pleaded. He hated seeing her distressed without being able to do anything about it. It was as difficult for him to bear as her inability to see was for her.

"There's nothing - I can't see! I don't know what's going to happen," she complained, expression forlorn as her eyes focused on his face.

"Things are going to work out," Jasper said, bending to brush a kiss over the top of Alice's head.

"Hmm," Alice hummed noncommittally.

"Alice?" Jasper prodded. She seemed like she had something more she wished to say.

"Things are changing - you can see that for yourself. I'm just trying to figure out how much," Alice finally admitted, sighing heavily. She seemed so very small and tired just then.

"I miss you," Jasper whispered, enfolding Alice into his arms once more. For a long time she didn't speak, nor did she return his embrace.

Mourning. That was the predominant emotion coming off of Alice though it didn't make any sense to him. Bella wasn't dead. And Edward would come back. Eventually, she'd be able to track him down.

Jasper tried to offer comfort, but she seemed unwilling to accept it. He floundered, puzzled by the changes he didn't understand.

Finally, she pressed her forehead tight against his chest and spoke, the words muffled though he had no problem hearing them. "You'll always be my best friend, Jazz. We've been through too much for that to ever change."

"Why does this feel like goodbye?"

Alice just grinned up at him before darting away. He could almost believe the smile held actual joy. Almost.

"I'll race you back to the house!" Jasper knew then that he wouldn't get any answers from her. As far as Alice was concerned the conversation was over.

"Did you already see yourself winning?" he called, taking off after the little cheater with the head start.

"I'll never tell," Alice sang, laughing, and this time Jasper actually could feel the joy and exhilaration she left in her wake as he followed her back home.

They'd barely been back ten minutes. Just long enough for Bella to voice her displeasure at being prevented from talking to Charlie, and for Carlisle and Emmett to prepare for their own hunting trip when Jasper heard the sound of a motorcycle coming up the drive. With it came rage, thick and oppressive. It was potent enough that he could feel it even before the wolf stopped his bike.

"Incoming," he informed the others, moving to block Bella should the child attack immediately.

"Who invited the mutt?" Rosalie hissed from Bella's other side.

He groaned inwardly wishing she'd kept that information to herself. Bella was so attached to the werewolf that she'd probably latch onto him now that Edward had taken off. If Rose had just kept her mouth shut, Carlisle could have gotten rid of him without Bella ever realizing he'd been here. Now they'd have to worry about a whole new threat _and_ put up with the stench that would probably permeate the entire house and linger indefinitely. Alice would insist on all new furniture to get rid of it.

"Jacob? Jacob's here?" Yep. She'd definitely be wanting him to stick around. She hadn't been this happy since the wedding. Great.

"Yes, Bella, he's coming up the drive," Carlisle said, going to the door as Esme, Emmett, and Alice all entered the room to strategically form a loose circle around Bella. Jasper nodded at the others when they sought his opinion on their placements. They could easily protect Bella should the need arise. She didn't even seem to notice as her visitor consumed her entire focus.

"Are you sure you're up for this? Jacob has a tendency to put his foot in his mouth around you," Jasper inquired, not wanting her unduly upset.

She chuckled, making the baby happy too. Jasper ignored Carlisle greeting the wolf as he absorbed Bella's happiness. It was rare and precious these days. Perhaps he could tolerate the wolf's presence for her sake.

"I want to see him," Bella insisted.

"Bella, I'm not sure it would be a good idea for him to know about… " Rose said, trying to dissuade her. Good luck with that.

"Why not? Are we keeping secrets from Jacob too? What's the point?" Bella said tiredly. Looked like she was still angry about not getting to talk to Charlie earlier. Yet despite that, he felt her determination rising. She was so stubborn.

"Rose, it's her decision," Jasper said. Rosalie rolled her eyes, but Bella smiled gratefully and weakly squeezed his hand. Her strength had waned so much that it barely registered, and wouldn't have if he hadn't watched her do it and felt her warmth soaking into him.

"Come in, please, Jacob."

Her voice was more croaked and strained than ever. Pretty soon she'd go to speak and nothing at all would come out. Her racing heart probably wouldn't hold out much longer than her voice. His turbulent emotions on the subject were too unbearable to process. He shied away from their sharp, jagged edges. It was enough that he had to endure the cutting razors of the others'.

The giant bronzed wolf strode in wearing his human skin, but there was something distinctly animalistic about the way he moved. An aggressive edge that he recognized in himself. Jake came to an abrupt halt once he was completely in the room. His head whipped around taking in the assembled group. Confusion. The anger had abruptly faded only to be replaced with suspicious confusion. Then his focus zeroed in on Bella and his entire person exploded with shock.

Jasper inched closer to Bella, positioning himself in the best place to intercept Jacob if he lost it and tried to attack. Bella's hand fluttered against Jasper's, trying to let him know that she believed it unnecessary. He remembered Jake's temper though and wasn't planning on taking any chances. He'd only interfere if truly needed though.

Chaotic emotions always made Bella more likely to vomit, and she did so now as if on cue. Rose was there with her ever present trash can and soothing hands. Bella's gratitude was a beacon shining out at the room.

"Sorry about that," Bella apologized. To the family or Jacob, he couldn't tell.

Jacob started forward then, a zombie catching the scent of fresh brains or a sleepwalker headed towards a cliff edge. Either way Jacob was making a beeline for Bella now. Rose aggressively got between the approaching wolf and Bella, determined to protect her investment.

"Rose, don't. It's fine," Bella urged. The pleading edge to the words and the increased heart rate that everyone in the room, besides Bella, was suddenly aware of convinced Rose to return to Bella's side and brush a hand over Bella's clammy forehead.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Jake asked crouching to take her hand. He didn't even glance at Jasper as he moved to her like a magnet caught in her inescapable pull. "Are you all right?"

"I'm glad you came to see me today, Jacob."

"What is it, Bella?"

Bella, looked around. Sensing her need for support just now, Jasper moved closer, hovering over her.

Jacob noticed him for the first time, but his eyes darted back to Bella when he heard her ask, "Help me up, Rose?" Rose hesitated. They'd tried to move her as little as possible this last day. Each time jostled the baby and ended up hurting Bella more than her body seemed capable of handling. "Please, Rose."

"No. Don't get up… " Jacob tried, looking very, very afraid as he drank in the sight of the girl he thought he was in love with. Jasper didn't quite agree based on what he felt.

This was the first time Jasper had been close to both Bella and Jacob at the same time since they'd prepared for Victoria's attack. He'd been too distracted then to notice the emotions each projected. It wasn't romantic love. Not from either of them. It wasn't obsession either. But it was… powerful. The gravitational force of a black hole sucking him in and drawing him closer, but it definitely wasn't romantic love. How intriguing. His analytical side longed to discuss it with Carlisle, but now wasn't the time.

"I'm answering your question," she snapped. Jasper bit back a smile at her exasperation. Jake never failed to get her hackles up. That much he had picked up before. At least that was how it seemed to him, like an annoying little brother.

Her shirt caught on the arm of the sofa as Rose helped her untuck her legs to stand. There was a fresh bruise, likely not even an hour old. Jasper berated himself as he realized it must have happened when he was out hunting with Alice this morning. Bella hadn't even mentioned it. Probably too worried that he'd sacrifice his health for hers in the future. She'd probably be right.

The room was silent as Jasper gaged Jacob's reaction. Dawning comprehension. Understanding warring with disgusted disbelief.

Then he was gone, racing from the house only to explode into a giant wolf as he dove from the porch.

"He… he left too," Bella whispered, severely devastated. Though her pain was nowhere in the realm of what she'd gone through when Edward did the same thing to her. Rose helped return Bella to the sofa.

"He'll be back," Jasper promised, knowing Jacob at least seemed incapable of staying away from Bella for long. "It's just a lot to process at once, and he didn't want to phase in here and risk hurting you."

"Liar," Bella accused.

"Maybe. But it sounds reasonable at least," Jasper acknowledged.

"Thanks for trying," she said then vomited again. There was blood in it this time, but the acrid scent of bile prevented it from being even remotely appealing.

There was an instant where the family just looked at one another, uncertain what to do. Then Carlisle was there taking charge.

"I think we need to try an IV," Carlisle suggested.

"I hate needles," Bella grumbled, but didn't resist or refuse.

"Emmett, can you assemble the medical bed? Jasper, can you clear a space for us to set up here?" he asked, gesturing to the center of the room. At once both boys set to work while Esme and Rosalie fussed over Bella, and Carlisle inserted an IV into her arm.

There was no denying that Bella's health was failing, and that she might not make it long enough to give birth. They needed a solution, and fast, or they would lose both Bella and the baby.

"I'll need to get more supplies," Carlisle warned once Bella was all set up in the family room turned ER.

"We've got things covered here," Jasper promised.

* * *

It was only an hour later that Jasper felt the presence of a wolf running up the drive. The La Push wolf wasn't alone either. Both newcomers were producing levels of panicked urgency that should have registered on the Richter scale with the way it shook him.

"Rose, stay with Bella! Emmett, outside with me - cover the door!" Jasper commanded, darting from beside the hospital bed, movements so fast they jostled Bella from her sleep. He hardly noticed Alice following out behind them.

"Jasper, wh - Rose? What is it? What's going on?"

Jasper heard Bella asking, but he was already out front, crouched low and growling as he faced off with two werewolves. Only the notes of friendliness coming from the smaller wolf kept Jasper from springing.

Seth shifted immediately, holding out his hands palm up to indicate he wasn't there to fight. The other wolf, Jacob, he guessed was whining up at Seth, but the kid was ignoring him. "Wow! Wow, it's just Jake and me. We came to warn you - Sam plans to attack!"

Jasper didn't relax his stance, but shifted his eyes to scan the surroundings, searching for the potential threat and assessing the easiest way to protect the helpless girl inside.

"Why?" Emmett asked, taken off guard by this development. Jasper was relieved to note Emmett did budge from his position blocking the door and easy entry into the house. "What's their problem?"

Feelings of appreciation had Jasper's head snapping around to find Alice pointedly looking away from Seth's naked body as embarrassment burst from her with the force of a tsunami. Jasper glanced back at Seth and for the smallest fraction of a second, Jasper studied him, trying to see what had captured Alice's attention in a way he'd never known to happen to her before. A single once over was enough for him to realize that the wolf was standing, arms crossed rather than attempting to shield himself, and completely unfazed by his nudity as he spoke with them.

"He thinks the kid is a threat. He wants to kill it - Bella too," Seth explained, and once more Jasper's focus was on the looming threat to his family.

A ferocious growl ripped from him, and his bared teeth had the kid taking a step back.

"Hey! Not us, remember?"

"Jasper? What happened?"

He heard Bella's frantic question from inside. Part of him wished she'd remained asleep through this. The stress and worry couldn't be good for her. Tension coiled through his body as he continued searching the surrounding woods with his eyes, senses kicking into overdrive, primed for a fight.

"They might not come though since we split from the pack. Plus they know we're warning you… " Seth continued, but suddenly trailed off, head cocked as he took in the three of them on the porch. "Where's Edward?"

"Gone," Jasper bit out, "he couldn't face… things."

Jacob growled, low and menacing. Jasper could relate - particularly right now. The russet fur on the wolf's back bristled, and a seething hatred swelled in the air between the wolves and vampires. Though for once it wasn't actually centered around the fact that they were natural enemies.

"Edward wouldn't!" Seth exclaimed, looking around. When no one yelled _Gotcha!_ his mouth dropped open. Jacob growled again. "Uh… I'm going to go run a patrol - let Jake talk to you about that. I'll howl if they approach," Seth said then turned and lopped off into the woods, phasing into a sandy colored wolf on the way.

"Carlisle, you need to get home quick. We might have company soon," Emmett said into his phone.

Jacob watched the smaller wolf for a few seconds then phased, a furious scowl on his face. He clasped his hands in front of him. At least he had a little modesty.

"Let's make this quick. I need to stay connected to Seth. Where are they?" Jacob asked, nodding to where Emmett was telling Carlisle what had happened so far.

"Getting supplies from the hospital for Bella. They'll be back soon," Jasper explained.

"Will he be all right?" Alice asked, looking towards where Seth disappeared. The uncertainty and small voice was hard for Jasper to witness, especially after their hunt earlier.

"Should be. He can take care of himself," Jake said, trying to sound confident, though his emotions betrayed him. Jasper sensed his protective concern. "Now what do you mean Edward's gone?"

"Later. Why does the pack plan to attack?" Jasper demanded. He needed to know so he could plan a proper defense.

"They don't trust that the _thing_ will be able to control itself. They want to stop it before it has a chance to massacre Forks like the newborns," Jacob explained.

Jasper was shaking his head in denial before Jacob had even finished. "It's not like them. The baby loves Bella. It's already in control of its emotions."

"Right," Jacob said, not even trying to mask his disbelief and disgust. The feelings reminded Jasper of Jacob's own feelings about the baby. He'd been horrified this afternoon. So why was he trying to warn them now? It was quite a big about face.

"And why are you here?"

"I can't let them kill Bella… or any of your family," Jacob admitted. Jasper sensed he meant it too. It was surprising. And welcome. Bella would love hearing she hadn't completely lost her friend, even after his less than supportive visit this afternoon.

"Since when?" Jasper asked, just to be certain.

"Look, this is hard enough for me. But Carlisle is…" he sighed. "I know killing any of you would be wrong - murder," Jacob said, practically having to choke the confession out. It must be hard saying nice things about your enemies. Jasper wouldn't know seeing as he'd never tried.

"Thank you for the warning," Jasper finally said after a brief silence. "Em, lock down the windows," he ordered his brother. The glass panels were an unnecessary liability right now.

"Jasper?" Bella called from inside.

He knew she was eager to hear about what was happening. Rose must not be telling her. The family really needed to get over keeping secrets from her. As soon as she was changed they wouldn't be able to anymore, and if they tried out of habit it would likely hurt her feelings.

"Go. I'll explain about Edward to him," Alice offered. "She needs you."

"Don't mention anything about Edward to Bella. Her condition worsens when she's upset," he warned before returning to Bella's side and attempting to ease her fears.

As succinctly as possible, Jasper outlined what little he'd learned from Seth and Jacob. Bella handled the news better than expected. Her only concern was about how hard it must be for Jake and Seth to leave home.

"You don't think they'll like staying here?" Jasper joked, trying to make Bella smile. She did, stretching her legs beneath the blanket.

The movement caused Jasper's pile of books on the end of the bed to fall to the floor, his research scattering. The papers floated to the floor and fanned out all around the bed. Jasper didn't try to stop their progress, just watched it all happen, smiling privately over Bella's embarrassment. It would be so strange when she wasn't clumsy anymore.

"I'm sorry my pregnancy is inconveniencing you," Bella wheezed, nodding towards the mess she'd made.

"What do you mean?" he asked, this hardly seemed like an inconvenience.

"I'm interrupting your life," she said, gesturing at a sheet of Jasper's research that had landed on the bed.

"Bella," he said, amusement lighting his words, "I have eternity to pursue my own amusements and endeavors. This situation is a bit more time sensitive."

"This situation?" she repeated, confused.

"We've been researching your condition. Searching for what to expect and how to help you best," he explained. "All of this is related to you and the baby."

"Jasper, you don't need to do that," she said, affection leaking out.

"Of course we do. We all have. You're worth it," he reminded her.

"You've said that to me before," she whispered, eyes closed as she replayed the memory of Jasper and Alice preparing to take her to Phoenix.

"It's as true now as it was then."

"If you say so."

"You brought this family to life. You gave us our humanity back - each and every one of us, the only possible exception to that being Carlisle seeing as his never went anywhere - and now you're giving us a gift that none of us ever dared hope for or dream of," Jasper said sincerely, placing a caring hand lightly against the place where her child rested.

"Do you love him too then?" Bella asked, hope glistening in her eyes.

He thought about it for a moment. This child had given him an opportunity to prove to himself that he was a better person than he'd been giving himself credit for. It had allowed him to help someone else. After nearly a century of being the source of death and suffering, it was an acute change. He'd felt it take root in his body.

More than that, he felt the child's innocent love. Not just for Bella either. Each time he sent soothing vibes into her womb, he was answered with ones of love - for him. The baby loved him for helping. It was a powerful knowledge.

"Immensely," he confirmed just as Bella nodded off, breathing labored and her tattered heart speeding too fast to last much longer. "Just hang on for us, Bella."


	4. 4: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Please don't get mad about Seth's age. It says in _Eclipse_ that he is fifteen. It doesn't say when his birthday is, so I'm taking the liberty of saying it's in mid August so he's already sixteen in this story, still young but not quite as much. Jake just thinks of him as younger cause he likes to think of himself as closer to Bella's age despite the books putting Jake at nearly two and a half years younger than Bella (she turned 19 in September and he didn't turn 16 until the next January and was still 16 by the end of the book series).

Also, Jacob was a sophomore when Bella was a senior. I changed it so he was a junior. Otherwise this story doesn't work right.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 4 - Alice

Jake was surprisingly silent as Alice explained that Edward had feared for Bella and wanted to end the pregnancy, then took off when she'd refused. It was easy to see that he was fuming over the whole thing. Biting back the words _I told you so _with each new revelation.

"After all that he just up and leaves," Jacob said, shaking his head angrily. His eyes were locked on the window where Bella could just be seen, Jasper at her side reading.

"She's not up for grabs now, Jacob," Alice said forcefully.

The last thing Bella needed right now was Jacob pointing out that this wouldn't have happened if only she'd picked him instead of Edward. Nor did Alice like the idea of Jacob trying to get Bella to give him a chance now that Edward was gone - again. That would mess things up for Jasper and she'd already begun preparing herself for that eventuality. None of them needed the extra stress of a new love triangle involving Jacob Black.

"You really think she'll be stupid enough to just go running back into his arms if he decides to pull his head out of his ass and come back?" Jacob demanded, incredulous.

"No, I don't," Alice admitted. His slacked jawed expression suggested that her response had surprised him. "But I also know she won't survive this as a human, which means you'll no longer be interested."

"I guess," Jacob said noncommittally.

"Trust me, wolf, I know what I'm talking about," Alice said, infusing her voice with as much surety as she was currently capable of. He'd do well to remember her sight. Even if it was currently on the fritz - he didn't know that, nor did he need to.

"You would," he agreed. Good. Her efforts had worked. "I should have killed him when I had the chance."

The idea hurt. Edward was her favorite sibling. He was the only one that understood the burden of her gift. His allowed him to experience her's for himself. It wasn't always pleasant knowing the future or being the one responsible for occasionally steering it.

"Bella would never have forgiven you."

"At least she wouldn't be dying because the bloodsucker insisted on getting some, and left her with his leech of a spawn," Jacob spat angrily.

"Stay away from her until you can control your mouth, Jacob Black," Alice hissed, moving closer as she glared at him. Her approach snagged his attention and he stared at her warily, nostrils flaring then wrinkling unpleasantly. "She's fading fast. Don't help it along. Please."

He swallowed, looking back through the window and shuttering at the sight. It was something straight out of a horror film. Bella was a zombie laid out on a medical bed with an IV hanging beside her head. The two outside could just make out the shallow rise and fall of her chest as she struggled to breathe. For several minutes Jacob watched, drinking in the sight as if it might be his last chance. And honestly it might be if they couldn't figure out a way for Bella to keep any food down fast.

"She -"

"Do you really want to live with the guilt for the rest of your life if you did something to hurt her? If you were what sent her over the edge?" Alice asked, laying it out for the mutt as bluntly as possible.

"I wouldn't," Jacob denied, angrily shaking his head.

Alice raised an eyebrow at him, staring impassively until he noticed. She begged to differ. She still remembered her visions of Bella crying after the newborn attack while Edward held her. Jacob had hurt her with what ever he'd said or done and that wasn't the first or the last time. It was a bad habit he had. He was too brash and pushy, and Bella wasn't very good at managing him properly.

"You might not do it deliberately," she allowed. It was a rather magnanimous concession on her part if she was being honest. "But you could potentially be immortal if you chose to be. Can you live with the knowledge that you hurt her forever? It's a very, very long time."

Jacob's eyes darted unwillingly back to the window. Back to the broken image of Bella asleep in her makeshift hospital room. Unhappiness surrounded him like a thick winter coat. Even from here they could hear her raspy, shallow breaths. It was easy to note the hollow, sunken cheeks, and gauntness. Her heart was stuttering every few beats. She might not last another day if a solution didn't present itself sooner rather than later.

The knowledge broke Alice's heart. She loved her sister and had no interest mourning her for the rest of eternity. There was still so much for them to see and do together. So much life to experience. Alice couldn't bear facing it all without her.

Jake looked back at Alice, scanning her face with a new intensity. He was searching for something. Alice wasn't sure what, but after a moment his head nodded infinitesimally. He'd found something, a reason to heed her words. Maybe he recognized a kinship in her, a mutual love for Bella and a shared pain should they lose her. It would be a burning loss - one that scarred and permanently disfigured in ugly, red textured ropes.

"Sure, sure, shortie," Jacob eventually agreed, tired eyes still fixed on Bella. "I'll watch it around her."

"Thank you. For helping us keep Bella safe," Alice whispered. Jacob's head twisted sharply to look at her, eyebrows raised.

"That wasn't manipulative. Nope, not at all," he huffed, then turned and phased, heading into the woods.

Alice remained outside once Jacob departed, in no rush to join the others. It was too heartbreaking watching Bella waste away and being unable to help. It was nearly as hard to watch Jasper fall in love with Bella bit by bit without even realizing it was happening. He was always so focused on everyone else's emotions that he rarely took the time to assess his own. She wondered how much longer he'd remain oblivious to the change.

Out of habit she searched Jasper's future. Everything was hazy, as though painted scenes that had been smeared. One thing bled into another. All blurry and distorted. It was a first-hand look into Picasso's mind.

_Jasper was asking Esme for more books. He wanted any that she could find on Central and South American native tribal legends. He handed her a list of specific titles that was two pages long. "See if they have anything related that I didn't include, please," Jasper asked._

Apparently the hundred and eighty-seven he'd read in the last week weren't enough to find the answers he sought. Or perhaps it had revealed just enough to put him on a path that he had decided to pursue further. There weren't enough clues to decipher the vision further and the lines bled so badly that she couldn't look for clues herself. She was surprised she'd been able to read Jasper's lips as well as she had. Esme's response hadn't been distinct enough to comprehend.

_Edward was holding his cell phone. He dialed the first three numbers of Carlisle's cell then turned the phone off and slumped back to the ground, head in his hands. He looked tortured and… remorseful._

So he was considering calling. That was progress at least. He hadn't made any similar decisions before now. Alice knew he wished he'd stayed. Sometimes his emotions just got the best of him. It happened to everyone, though Edward was setting new records for what _not_ to do.

For so long Edward had felt next to nothing. There had been a number of times in the last year and a half that he hadn't handled suddenly feeling so much very well. It was too much and his instinct drove him to extremes. He overreacted because of his lack of practice.

The family had been very understanding, recognizing how difficult a time he was having. But looking back, it was possible they'd done him a disservice each time they'd given him a pass on his behavior. The discrepancy between his actual age and the emotional one he was frozen into made it challenging for everyone to know when and how to guide him through the minefield he'd stumbled into for his first relationship. He didn't react well when he wasn't in total control every moment.

Bella hadn't seemed to mind his high-handedness overly much, except for when it drove Edward to move the whole family away. She always just seemed happy to have whatever bit of Edward he was willing to share with her. Maybe Alice should have encouraged Edward to view Bella as more of a partner instead of the girl he constantly needed to save. He'd developed a complex because of it.

Was part of this current situation Alice's fault? She was always on the lookout for when Bella was in danger, reporting directly to Edward each time she had the slightest cough or made a decision that could be reckless. Alice just hadn't wanted to risk losing Bella. But constantly reminding Edward that Bella was weak and frail had made him start thinking of her that way too. It unintentionally belittled her and put Edward in a position where he ended up disregarding or overlooking her strengths. It was why he lacked faith in Bella now.

_Charlie was calling the house again. Carlisle answered, and Charlie was confused since the doctor was supposed to be in Atlanta with Bella. _

The vision vanished before Alice could see if they'd have trouble. Best to err on the side of caution.

"Esme, you should be the only one to answer the home phone from now on," Alice said, knowing the people inside would be able to hear her. "Carlisle is supposed to be out of town with Bella."

"Of course," Esme replied. Her voice had lost much of its usual warmth. She missed her son and wanted him to come home. His absence was tearing her apart.

_Edward was running. Trees zipped past, little more than green blurs. _

Was that how they looked to Bella when Edward ran with her? How peculiar. Alice didn't appreciate the distortions the baby was causing her sight.

_With jarring suddenness, Edward came to a halt. His eyes closed briefly. Then he was spinning and racing back the direction he'd just come from._

Alice growled. Why didn't he just come back? She felt like pommeling him just then. Never before had she been so infuriated by his actions. If he would just call at the very least!

The phone.

The thought startled her. The first vision had shown him dialing Carlisle. His phone might be on again. He'd turned it off when he'd first left, but he was at least contemplating calling so that might have changed.

Her phone was out and she was dialing in an instant. The first ring was all she heard.

_Edward looked at the caller ID and squeezed the phone so hard it shattered into useless bits of plastic and metal. The dust and pieces fell slowly from his hand to bounce on the dusty wooden floor as he watched, entranced._

He destroyed his phone! He destroyed his phone so he wouldn't have to talk to her! "Argh!" Alice groaned, stomping her foot. Oh just wait till she got her hands on him!

"Alice? Sweetie, are you all right?" Esme called, having heard the tantrum Alice was throwing. She wished she could tell her that her son was coming home - relieve her worries. But she couldn't.

Instead, Alice said, "Yes, just annoyed with my gift. Don't mind me."

If Alice could cry, she would. The pressure behind her eyes radiated outward, expanding until her skull threatened to burst. Add that on top of her already pounding headache and Alice was desperate for anything to make the pain stop.

She didn't even want to try seeing more. _What was the point? _

But just because she didn't want to see, didn't mean she could stop if from happening.

_Esme and Carlisle were decorating the second room in the cottage with some of the purchases that Alice and Rosalie had made for the baby. All gender neutral. _

The scene was washed out and too bright. The images seemed to glow from within making it nearly painful to watch. Alice's inner eye winced and squinted like she was staring into the sun. It was uncomfortable, a sensation she wasn't used to considering it didn't actually hurt her to look directly at the sun with her vampire eyes.

_Carlisle was assembling a white crib in one corner while Esme was arranging stuffed animals and books on the shelves of a built-in bookcase. Esme turned to smile at Carlisle after straightening a pale grey long eared rabbit. Carlisle glanced up in time to see and returned the smile with such joy. _

_Carlisle abandoned his project in favor of joining Esme. Gently, he ran his fingers through her caramel-colored hair and she leaned against him, love blanketed the room and was evident in their interactions like some new, unnamed color available for all to see._

_There was a beautiful gold and crystal antique chandelier illuminating the room - not that it needed to be any brighter - and an overstuffed white chair with a soft fluffy blanket draped over the back. A reddish-brown teddy bear - or was it a wolf - was propped against the pillow in the chair. It was the darkest thing in the room, the one true splash of color._

Alice blinked when the scene disappeared. As much as it had hurt to see it, she had enjoyed experiencing it. She wanted that to happen. Carlisle and Esme wouldn't have been so happy if they didn't have hope that both the fetus - _baby_ \- and Bella would survive this. She wanted Bella to live more than she wanted anything else.

The memory of the future gave her hope. Enough hope that she hardly noticed the wrecking ball that had begun using her head as bowling pins.

* * *

"False alarm. Again," Emmett muttered from the loan remaining window where he was acting as lookout. The howling had started up again a couple minutes ago and everyone was tensed, waiting.

The new ever-present ache throbbed steadily in Alice's temples. She was perched on the steps, reluctant to leave Bella now that her condition had deteriorated so significantly. She feared every breath might be her sister's last.

The vision, when it came, was unexpected yet welcomed despite its brevity because it had been days since her last clear one, and this one was pristine - crisp and sharp. Perfect.

_Carlisle was ordering more bags of blood from a bank in Seattle. He confirmed the number, and then after a moment doubled the requested amount._

"Carlisle, you need to order more blood," Alice announced just as Seth strolled casually into the room as though expected and welcomed in the vampire's lair. He didn't seem the least bit uncomfortable around so many of his natural enemies.

"Blood? For the baby?" he asked, glancing around.

"Why would you think that? And what was the howling about this time?" Emmett asked.

"Geez. She looks awful," Seth said, grimacing when he got his first good look at Bella. She was sleeping, very nearly unconscious. What would happen if she just stopped waking up? Would Carlisle finally intervene?

"Focus, kid," Em commanded, snapping his fingers impatiently.

"Sorry. Leah decided she's joining our pack," he huffed, every bit the wronged little brother.

"What's this about Leah?" Jasper asked. No doubt he was considering how this affected our odds of winning should it come down to a fight. Jasper's mind was forever analyzing potential dangers.

"Uh. I phased before getting the whole story, but basically she doesn't want to stay in Sam's pack, so Jake and I are stuck with her," Seth complained, leaning against the wall just inside the door.

"Harsh," Alice reprimanded.

"Try sharing a mind with your sibling," Seth shot back defensively.

"We have," Emmett reminded him, chuckling a bit, but his laugh cut off abruptly at the memory of their brother, and his current absence.

"Oh, right - Edward," Seth said, looking around. He seemed to want to ask more about it. Thankfully, he let it drop. No one was really up for discussing Edward lately. He'd gotten them into this situation then vanished. It was rather irresponsible of him. Even Seth, who hero-worshipped Edward, could see it. "But it's good news because now Sam's down three wolves. There's no way he's attacking with just seven. He's too outnumbered now that we've joined up with you."

"We'd never expect you to fight your family," Esme said, coming down the stairs behind Alice, running her fingers comfortingly through her daughter's dark spikey locks as she passed. Esme had taken over research on the computer upstairs when Emmett had needed a break.

"But I will if it becomes necessary. It's the right thing to do," Seth said, shrugging.

"We won't let it come to that. But what was the other thing you mentioned - about blood?" Carlisle asked.

"Blood? Oh, well… It's part vamp, right?" Seth asked, nodding at Bella's protruding stomach. "What else would it want to eat?"

"Carlisle, you don't think… " Rosalie began, excitement clear. She'd been ignoring Seth prior to that, but now she was fully engaged in the conversation.

"It's… thirsty," Carlisle finished, nodding slightly as he contemplated the theory.

"We should try it - immediately," Rose insisted, already heading to the fridge Carlisle had stocked with blood and medications for Bella. "We have all that type O negative laid aside for Bella. It's a good idea."

"Hmm… I don't suppose," Carlisle murmured, more to himself than the others. Sometimes Alice thought he was actually directing his thoughts to Edward when he did that since Edward almost always responded, helping him debate and work through whatever challenge was plaguing him. Carlisle glanced around, then nodded absently. "The best way to administer it would -"

"We don't have time to be creative. They're both literally starving to death by the minute. I'd say we should start with the traditional way," Rosalie called from upstairs.

"Yum, yum," Seth joked, glancing around like he expected the others to laugh at his weak joke. He just smiled, unaffected when no one acknowledged him.

"I can't believe we didn't think of it before. Thanks, Seth," Carlisle said, clasping him on the shoulder as he passed.

"If Bella's drinking human blood… " Jasper said anxiously, looking around the room with a sort of panicked edginess.

"Go hunt, Jazz," Alice said immediately. Offering him the out he seemed desperate for.

"Will the pack -" he began, hesitating despite his growing need to flee. His personal emotions were starting to leak out and fill the room. Rarely did he lose control enough for his true emotions to influence others rather than those he wanted others to feel.

"Nope. It'd be a suicide mission. They're regrouping - protecting the reservation above all else," Seth replied. Then explained further, "You have a small window if you need to do something, especially since it's day and they don't really think you'll do anything - vampire myths and all that. I'd say you at least have until sundown, but it'll likely be open season on you starting tonight."

Alice tried to see. It was blurred, unclear. Nearly as bad her her visions from last night. She considered multiple options. But only when she decided to send Jasper west did it vanish completely.

"Head east, but stay close. You'll be back in three hours - I think," Alice advised, frowning at her own uncertainty. It didn't feel right letting him go into danger without the guarantee that he'd be all right. "Take Emmett just in case." At least that way he'd have back up if he ran into trouble. The family, in turn, would be fine thanks to the three werewolf defectors.

Jasper and Emmett were gone without delay. It was a good thing too, because Rosalie entered not four seconds later with a cup of warmed human blood in her hand, a straw poking out the top.

"Bella, wake up. We think we have a way to help the baby," Rosalie cooed softly, brushing Bella's hair back as she spoke.

"Hmm?" Bella asked sleepily. There was barely any sound left to her voice. The final lingering dregs had been sapped during the night. "What's going on?"

"Seth thought of something that might help you," Rose said encouragingly. "It won't -"

"Ready to start your life as a vampire?" Seth interrupted, grinning. He moved closer, acting as a supportive friend.

"I don't understand," Bella said as Rosalie lifted her into a reclined sitting position, doing all the work Bella's withered muscles no longer could.

"We figured out what the baby needs," Rose explained, lifting the cup towards Bella. The thick liquid sloshed against the sides of the cup and its appealing fragrance permeated the room. Alice stopped breathing for fear that she'd snatch the cup away and down it herself before Rose could truly get Bella to drink it. The dry burn of her throat had decided to compete with her head to see which could hurt her worse. "A way to feed the baby. Maybe."

"Vampire… Oh. He's thirsty." Bella was eyeing the cup, surprised and intrigued.

"Yes. Your condition - both of your conditions - are deteriorating rapidly. We don't have time to waste, to come up with more palatable ways to do this. The fastest way to test the theory -" Carlisle explained, moving to stand at the end of Bella's bed.

"I've got to drink it," she said, watching as Rose eased her up a bit more to make swallowing easier.

There was a hungry look in Bella's eyes. It probably matched Alice's. Looks like they might have been right on track about what the fetus wanted. Stupid little parasite.

Alice immediately felt shame over the direction her thoughts had taken. It wasn't the fetus's fault that it messed with Alice's gift and was hurting Bella. Alice went back to trying her best not to even think about the fetus at all. Thankfully Jasper wasn't around to sense her warring emotions.

Esme was holding her breath like Alice in the presence of the cup. Only Carlisle was truly immune. Though Rose's attention was so focused on the _baby_ that she didn't seem to mind either.

"You sure are taking this well," Seth commented, plopping down into Jasper's vacated chair. Alice was surprised to note that he didn't seem to mind much either.

"It'll be good practice. For the future, right?" Bella said, looking around at everyone assembled. It was easy to see that she was self-conscious about drinking the blood in front of all of them. Probably worried they'd think she'd gone insane. "So, who caught me the grizzly bear?" she asked, just barely managing to nod at the cup.

"I'm sorry, Bella. It will be a more efficient test if we don't cut corners," Carlisle said gently.

"You're going full on human blood, Bells," Seth clarified with a grin, using Jake's nickname for her. "Drink up," he added encouragingly when she hesitated, eyes wide with alarm.

"Oh… " she breathed. "But won't this count… Where's Jasper?" she asked, looking about the room once more now that she'd realized he was missing.

So she knew about the bet. Jasper wouldn't like that. He'd feel guilty.

"He's hunting. He wouldn't have hurt you, but I thought it might be easier for him since you're going to have… " Alice explained to stop Bella's confused search and redirect her to the task at hand. Thinking about Bella and Jasper's relationship made it easier to ignore the tempting aroma of the blood Rosalie was still waving around in front of Bella as she took the necessary breath required to speak. Though it was no less painful, just… in a different way.

Esme slipped quietly from the room. Alice knew her mother felt bad about not being able to support Bella just now. Her inability to offer support was likely breaking her heart, but Alice understood. The aroma really was tantalizing, particularly with Rose moving it about and stirring it up. Luckily, Bella didn't seem to notice the silent departure - not that she wouldn't want Esme to leave if she knew how it was making her uncomfortable.

"Of course. I didn't think. He's already suffering so much to help me," she said, frowning sadly.

"None of us mind, Bella," Carlisle reassured her. "You're family."

Finally Bella weakly lifted her arms in an attempt to take the cup. She hesitated though, her arms dropping, and suspicion had crept into her voice as she croaked, "Who?" Her head had turned to Seth as the single word escaped her lips.

"Not me! Jeez, Bella. Not Jake either if that was your next question," he said quickly, shaking his head, and trying not to laugh at her. "We love you, but not that much. Besides, they said human blood. We don't count."

"Jake is… " she breathed, the words coming out light as air.

Of course her mind had snagged on that detail. Just the mutt's name had her attention. The connection didn't make sense to Alice - especially not after her visions of Bella and Jasper together. But Jacob usually made Bella happy, so Alice wasn't completely averse to having him around. Even if he did have that awful wet dog smell and the worst fashion sense - cut-off sweats, _seriously_?

"Running patrol, making sure you're safe," Seth promised, patting her leg affectionately.

"Always protecting me," Bella said, closing her eyes and breathing as deeply as she was able to.

"We already had blood on hand. For you - just in case. Don't worry about anything at all. It's going to be fine. I have a good feeling about this, Bella. I think the baby will be so much better. Now quit stalling and drink up," Rose coaxed, moving the cup so the straw was resting against Bella's lips and all she had to do was open up and inhale.

"Well, I'm starving, so I'll bet this little one is, too. Let's go for it. My first vampire act."

Alice offered Bella an encouraging smile when their eyes met. Alice felt her own flicker briefly to the hand Bella had unconsciously placed against the bulge containing the damaging fetus. Alice wasn't particularly enamored with the fetus. Resentful might be the best description of her sentiments for it. She'd never felt any desire to have children of her own. She didn't remember that aspect of being human. She had no maternal instinct.

The fetus was also the reason for everything. Bella dying little by little every moment she carried it. Alice's failed visions. Edward leaving. Jasper and Bella… _Jasper and Bella falling in love._

Alice wanted to hate it for all the problems it was causing, for the risks it meant her sister was taking. But she couldn't bring herself to truly hate it. Because the fetus was also the reason Jasper was learning to trust himself. It was healing him and helping him down a path to true happiness.

And Bella loved it. Alice couldn't ever really hate something that someone she loved, loved. She sighed.

It was also possible that she was hating on the baby because she refused to let herself be mad at either Jasper or Bella. The heart wants what it wants. A person can't help how they feel or who they love. Alice loved them and wanted them to be as happy as possible. Even if that meant stepping aside so they could be together. She'd even try to make it easier for them and never let them know how much it hurt her to do it.

"Is it any good?" Seth asked curiously. He didn't seem the least bit disgusted, merely wondering. His easy acceptance and reassuring grin had Bella taking a larger sip.

"Actually… yes," she admitted once one-eighth of the cup had been drunk. Seth laughed outright at her. She smiled and added, "It's delicious."

"Drink up then," he joked as she started gulping it down greedily. "Maybe not that fast, Bella. Easy there," he cautioned. She blushed at the teasing and Alice was surprised to see that she actually could blush again. Her delicate health had rendered her incapable for the last couple days.

"Where are my manners, want some?" Bella teased back, offering the cup to Seth. It was startling and wonderful to see her already feeling well enough to make jokes and hold the cup on her own.

Carlisle noted the change as well and moved to monitor Bella's pulse as she continued drinking.

"Naw, I'm good," Seth said, waving her off. He continued grinning at Bella, and she smiled back brightly. There was no denying that the baby had been craving blood. For a second Alice dared to hope that this would be enough to save Bella. "I ate… " Seth trailed off, a little crease wrinkling his forehead as he stopped to consider when he'd last eaten.

"Come on, Seth. We have a kitchen full of food that no one here is going to eat," Alice offered, grateful to the wolf for his suggestion, and for making the process easier on Bella. Besides, it gave her an excuse to escape as well. That blood was making her extremely uncomfortable.

Seth followed after her immediately, eager for food. Alice remembered Bella talking about a bonfire once where the pack had demolished the equivalent of an entire cow in a single sitting. The two entered the kitchen to discover that Esme had already begun making breakfast. There were eggs and pancakes on the stove, and she was buttering some freshly toasted slices of bread.

"You're the best!" Seth announced, accepting the plate of toast and practically inhaling it as Esme flipped the pancakes then scooped eggs onto his newly emptied plate. "Mmmm, this is so good," Seth moaned appreciatively as he ate the offering. Esme beamed at the praise.

"It's the least we can do after everything you're doing for us," Esme said softly, moving to the cabinet to retrieve some maple syrup.

"It's nothing, really. I like you guys. I'm not about to let someone hurt any of you," Seth said between mouthfuls.

Esme reached out like she wanted to touch his cheek, but stopped when she remember the wolves' aversion to the vampire's smell and contact. Seth just chuckled then reached out to hug her in thanks. Esme was so touched by the gesture that if she could be crying she would be.

Alice appreciated the kindness he was showing her mom, and moved closer to where Seth was consuming about five times as much as Bella typically ate since she didn't think he would mind her close proximity. Alice had barely sat down at the island barstool before the pain in her head dispersed like fog on a sunny day.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, turning a startled look on Seth.

"What? What'd I do?" he asked, looking around for clues. Esme just shrugged from where she was standing before the kitchen sink rinsing the dishes she'd used to mix the pancake batter.

"You're better than aspirin," Alice explained, lightly touching her head to indicate what she meant.

"Thanks. I think," Seth replied.

"Your headache is gone?" Esme asked hopefully, abandoning the sink to flip two completed pancakes onto Seth's newly cleared plate.

"Yes. For the first time in days. As soon as I got near Seth my mind stopped trying to see the future. I've never been able to turn it off before," Alice said, cocking her head as she assessed Seth.

"Glad I could help?" he said, the words sounding more like a question because he was unsure if Alice thought this was a good thing or not.

Howls echoed through the forest before Alice could explain the difficulty she'd been having. Seth was gone in a flash, racing through the door and phasing between one step and the next as he headed into the woods and towards the warnings. Bits of dark blue cloth littered the ground where he'd shifted.

Worry had Alice walking outside, as if in a trance. Jasper and Emmett weren't back yet. If something happened to them and she hadn't foreseen it…

Without Seth, the visions came quick, one after another, but each as frustratingly indistinct as all of them had been these last few weeks.

_Edward was showing Bella the newly renovated cottage, her red eyes glancing around as she took in everything. Edward's focus was centered solely on Bella and her reactions. He couldn't seem to care less, just wanted her to like it. _

A halo had surrounded everything, and the scene had faded in and out, growing dim and dark one moment then the next brightening, yet never in focus. It was the least distinct of any vision. It didn't take a genius to figure out it was because this future was highly unlikely.

Alice frowned and picked up a piece of Seth's shredded pants. The scent of sandalwood came to her, stronger than any hint of dog. It was nice, earthy almost, and comforting.

_Jasper was special ordering a new pair of Jimmy Choo black heels decked out in glittering sequins that would go perfectly with the new purse Alice had ordered last month. He had Rosalie's name on the order._

Alice wasn't fooled. For one, he never gave Rosalie gifts. Second, he always tried to do things like that when he was attempting to surprise her. His very efforts in trying to hide his actions were usually what gave him away.

_Edward was running, full out through the woods as he headed towards the house. He was through a small clearing without pausing to take in the beauty or hunt the fleeing herd of deer. _

Alice recognized the area. It was less than an hour from here. It was near her favorite hunting grounds. She could head there now and meet him.

_Edward abruptly turned and ran back in the direction he'd come from. There was no destination in sight, and no signal as to what altered his course._

Of course, he once again just had to go and change his mind! Ugh! Alice wished she could yell at him for his unwillingness to face the situation properly. Frustrated, she slid to the ground, legs folded to her chest and arms wrapped tightly around them. The fabric she'd picked up still secure within her clenched fist like a talisman meant to ward off evil.

_Emmett and Jasper were repairing a wall in the cottage, plaster and paint supplies scattered at their feet. Em punched Jasper's arm then asked, "So, did you put her through the wall or was it the other way around?" Jasper smirked, but didn't respond. "Nice!" Em commended, holding his hand up for a high five. _

_Jasper used the opening to aim a punch at his brother's stomach then wrestle him to the ground, knocking over the open paint can. An ivory spill seeped across the hardwood floor as the guys rolled through the thick liquid. _

_Bella entered, flitting over to stand beside the boys with her hands on her hips and brilliant red eyes glaring dangerously. "Do - not - break - my - house," she commanded._

"_Looks like you and Jazz have already got that covered," Em teased, the tips of his hair frosted white and a smeared handprint marked his cheek. _

_Jasper, arm looped around Emmett's neck, squeezed threateningly then shoved him away. He hopped up to face Bella, and grinning sheepishly, said, "Sorry, darlin', won't happen again. We'll have this cleaned up in no time."_

_Bella's arms looped around his neck, heedless of the wet paint ruining her clothes, and Jasper pulled her close, hands sliding provocatively down her sides. A gasp escaped Bella's lips and her back arched bringing her flush against Jasper's leonine length._

Proof. Well… nearly proof that Jasper would be with Bella. It was the clearest vision yet. Almost as clear as the one about Carlisle needing more blood. She knew from experience that he must have let Bella feel his emotions to inspire such a wanton reaction.

Alice wished it surprised her, witnessing him do that. But it didn't. That very first vision of the two of them together had prepared her with the knowledge that Bella would open Jasper in a way she herself was incapable of.

Jasper hated sharing his true emotions, even with Alice. He always had. It left him too vulnerable. Alice had always understood, and never asked him to change. So while it wasn't shocking to see it happen between the new couple, it hurt.

The next vision distracted her from the pain, and she welcomed the change in topic.

_Esme was buying extra groceries, far more than usual. There were things Bella wouldn't even consider eating too, like steaks and ribs. There were also new, packaged clothing. _

Alice cringed at seeing the cheap t-shirts enclosed in plastic. It must be for the wolves. They wouldn't want to wear things that smelled distasteful to them. Plus, while Seth could easily wear Emmett's clothes, Jake was likely too big for them. And Leah gave the impression that she wouldn't want any of Esme's cast-offs. She'd probably rather stay wolf than even consider wearing them.

"Esme? Can you get some clothes together for the wolves? I don't think they have any extra with them, and they can't go home right now for replacements," Alice said, not bothering to look back at the house. Esme immediately headed upstairs, her distinctive tread could be heard all the way to the treeline where Alice sat.

"That's a wonderful idea. I'll find some things no one has worn so the smell won't bother them as much, and I was just thinking about picking up a few things next time I was out," Esme said, happily sorting through her closet and carefully pulling a few items out for Leah. Alice didn't bother to say she already knew Esme was thinking of doing just that.

_Jasper and Emmett were exchanging research on the pregnancy, comparing notes and theories. Jasper pointed to something Emmett had written, and looked up, waiting for further explanation._

Then the setting shifted, and Alice was seeing a different time and place.

_Edward was dialing Carlisle's cell number from a payphone at a gas station. _

Alice searched the area, looking for clues as to where it was, but it could have been anywhere. She continued watching even as the majority of her mind looked for something telling about the location.

_He was speaking to their father, Alice was sure. "How is she?" Edward asked and listened to the answer, expression agonized. "Will she survive?" Again he waited. After a moment, the phone crushed in his hand and he crumpled to the dirty, broken pavement, expression displaying the agonies of the fires of hell burning him alive._

Alice didn't know which would be more likely to cause such a reaction - learning that Bella would die, or discovering that she'd live and knowing he'd have to atone for abandoning her. Either option was as likely as the other.

There was still so much uncertainty. The future was up in the air. Things could go so many different ways.

The only thing she felt fairly confident about was that Jasper and Emmett would be fine. They still had futures. Nothing indicated that they wouldn't. Returning to the house, Alice watched as Rose's head snapped up expectantly. She waited, staring intensely even as she took Bella's finished cup.

"They're fine," Alice reassured her.

"See, Bella, nothing to worry about," Rose said, pretending only Bella had been worried. She wasn't fooling anyone, but Carlisle and Alice both let it go. And Bella was too caught up grimacing at the fetus's movements to notice, her hands running along her belly as if following the path of a soccer player dribbling a ball across the field of her swollen stomach.

The next thing Alice realized was that Bella's heart had already slowed down, beating far more regularly instead of its former marathon racing. A rosy flush had entered her cheeks as well. Alice blinked rapidly, making sure she was really seeing Bella recovered and that it wasn't an unexpected vision.

"You look better," Alice said, stepping closer and smiling despite the return of constant throbbing in her head.

"I feel stronger. I think the baby -" _Crack! Snap! _ "AHHHH!" Bella screamed, doubling over her belly and grabbing at it. Her teeth had clenched and she was panting through them as she whimpered pitifully.

That sound… It was the sound of a bone breaking. Alice recognized it from hunting. But… it had come from _Bella. It had come from inside her. _The baby had broken one of her bones. Maybe several. Alice watched the unfolding scene in horror, retreating until the wall met her back.

"Carlisle!" Rose screamed, but it was unnecessary since he was already there. The two scooped Bella up and rushed her upstairs.

Alice's arms curled helplessly around her middle as she stared at the spot Bella had just been in. She felt Esme's comforting arms wrap around her as they listened to Carlisle X-raying Bella, talking about possible splinters _\- splinters_ \- and confirming that two ribs had transverse fractures and another had a greenstick fracture.

Alice leaned against her mother, resenting the helplessness that threatened to overwhelm her.

The baby was stronger. Strong enough to break Bella from the inside out. And Alice could do nothing to help. Nothing except encourage Jasper to stay close to Bella and use his gift to help.

"It's not that bad. I'm all right now," Bella insisted while Carlisle wrapped the area as securely as possible. "That's helping," she said.

Rosalie carried Bella back downstairs, her patient insisting on getting away from the office turned hospital. Bella was white as a sheet, all color leached from her face. A face that was set in harsh, tense lines. The bandages compressed Bella's expanding bust line and made her borrowed shirt lumpy. She'd been wearing Emmett's shirts up until now, but this was one of Jasper's brown Henley long-sleeve shirts. Rosalie must have grabbed it for Bella when Carlisle was treating her.

When the guys returned fifteen minutes later, it was obvious what they'd missed without even being told.

Jasper was at Bella's side in an instant. Alice barely had time to note that his eyes were more golden than they'd ever previously been. He must have gorged. Good. That'd help if Bella was going to be drinking human blood regularly.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I won't leave again." One of Jasper's hands had unerringly found its way back to Bella's rounded belly, careful to avoid the fresh bandages, while the other brushed a loose lock of hair back behind her ear. His fingers lingered in her hair, rubbing the strands between his thumb and forefinger lightly.

"It's all right, Jasper. I don't want you in pain. You have to hunt. There's no reason for you to suffer," Bella soothed him, trying to relieve his guilt. Even her voice sounded stronger.

"I'll be fine, darlin'," Jasper drawled, smiling reassuringly. "I need to be here more."

The use of the pet name reminder Alice of her vision. It was too much to take. There was no way she could conceal her pain from Jasper if she had to watch any longer. Not after the scare Bella had just given her.

Alice slipped back outside, needing to get away from the pair. Their relationship wasn't guaranteed, but it was already primed to happen.

The treeline she's sat at earlier was three steps away when she froze. Her thoughts had directed her gift to show her Bella and Jasper's combined future.

_Bella was chasing Jasper through the woods. The silk skirt of her dark blue dress trailed behind her sprinting figure, fuzzy as a tutu._

Alice recognized the dress. Even blurred as it was, she'd know it anywhere. She'd bought it for Bella just before graduation knowing it would be perfect for Bella to wear when she saw herself as a vampire for the first time. That meant this was going to happen soon. It had to if Bella's pregnancy continued progressing at the rate it was.

_Bella was wrestling with a mountain lion, laughing as she pinned it to the ground. The creature swiped her with its claws, but she ignored the useless struggle. Her teeth sunk into the large feline's neck and she drank deep. _

_After a moment she sat back, looking down at it curiously. _

_A sudden sound had her on her feet, spinning to face Jasper. The beautiful silk dress was in pieces. Tattered scraps hung off her exposing more than they covered. She didn't seem to notice._

_Jasper's eyes were wide as he scanned her from head to toe in the time it would take a human to blink. Then his shirt was off and he'd flashed to Bella's side to wrap her in it._

_Bella smiled ruefully, letting him reach around her. She became distracted, her eyes focused on Jasper's newly bared skin. Her fingers moved to touch him, ghosting over the scars on his chest. It was easy to see she was fascinated, entranced. _

Alice's legs gave out, and suddenly she was on the ground. Instinct had her curling into a ball, trying to make herself as small as possible. If she couldn't be seen then no one could hurt her.

She was ready to face the future - no matter the discomforting pangs it caused her. Too bad thinking it didn't always translate immediately into reality. The weeks of bracing herself, building walls to shield and protect her heart were insufficient. This latest vision, coming so unexpected and so vividly, demonstrated how flimsy her barriers were as they dissolved like sugar in water.

This wasn't the first time she'd seen Jasper and Bella actually being intimate. No that had happened a couple days ago when she and Jasper had gone hunting, but somehow she knew this would be the first time chronologically speaking.

_The moment Bella's fingers connected with his skin, Jasper's eyes closed. His throat worked as he swallowed the excess venom in his mouth. Once. Twice. All the while Bella's hand continued exploring the contours of his chest._

_Then some unknown trigger was pulled and the two practically pounced on one another. Lips crashed and collided. Bella seemed to be trying to burrow herself into Jasper._

Just when her heart was threatening to blast apart, the pieces scattering like so much rubble, it stopped. The inevitable moment vanished, disepaited like smoke from a blast, the remaining debris the only evidence it had happened at all.

But now that it was over, she wanted to see it again. Not because she wanted the pain it caused. No. She wanted all the information possible. Needed it.

Alice blinked, realizing the swelling pressure in her head was gone too. There was a shadow blocking the moon and stars.

Seth had appeared - naked again. He was at her side, staring down at her hunched form in concern. She glared up at him, annoyed that he'd interrupted her vision. It was his fault she was left wanting to know what happened next. She was impatient for the knowledge. If this was her future, it would be happening soon. She needed time to mentally prepare since apparently she wasn't as ready to face it as she'd thought she was.

Racking her eyes over Seth's exposed skin, Alice found herself assessing the wolf, appreciating his physique for the second time in as many days. It was impossible not to with the way he had it all on display. He was far too comfortable with himself. Though he clearly had reason to be. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head when she saw that particular part of his anatomy.

The russet skin lacked tan lines. It was natural, or maybe he always ran around naked. Alice wouldn't be surprised to discover that he did. Seth was so dark compared to the members of her family. It looked like warm caramel. His short-cropped onyx hair was shiny and silky. Alice wondered if it felt as soft to the touch as it looked. The infectious joy in his eyes as he looked at her made her own lips twitch upward in response, dimming her annoyance.

"Well? What's the latest problem?" she inquired, curious about what had taken place when he took off a little bit ago.

"They thought they could talk us into rejoining the pack. Not likely," Seth snorted.

"And the reason you still haven't put anything on? Do you have an aversion to clothes or something?" Alice asked dryly. She heard Esme finishing up in the laundry room when she voiced the question.

"I sort of shredded mine and I don't have more," he said, rubbing his head bashfully. "And I can't really go home… "

"Esme's preparing some of Emmett's for you - they're the only ones likely to fit," she explained. Jasper was too lean, built like an olympic swimmer rather than Emmett and Seth's football player, or borderline bodybuilder, physiques. And Edward looked like a typical non-athletic teenager in comparison.

Darting into the house, Alice took the basket of said clothing from Esme. She took the basket in her left hand, only now noticing that her right still clutched a piece of Seth's pants. As discreetly as possible, she stuffed the torn fabric into her pocket, embarrassed.

"I'm hoping the dryer sheets helped reduce some of the smell. Do you think they'll wear them?" Esme asked, reaching into the dryer for the last shirt. It was Esme's, so Alice knew it was intended for Leah. Alice didn't think Leah would, but Seth…

"Of course they will. They've got to wear something, after all," Alice reassured her, turning to leave. "I'll let Seth know you included stuff for Jacob and Leah too."

Seth was waiting for her a little ways from the house. Alice practically shoved the basket at him. Seth just laughed and put the clothes on. Funny how Jacob had stood naked as he talked to her earlier and she hadn't noticed him at all…

"Thanks, Alice," he said, dropping onto the grass. Alice sat beside him, grateful for the relief he gave her head. It was strange going without visions. They'd always been a constant din in her head, like a tv left on too loud in the background, impossible to completely ignore even as a person tried to do other things.

"It was Esme," Alice said absently.

Seth nodded, then out of the blue asked, "Do you know where Edward is?"

The unexpected question caught her off guard. The memory of him changing his mind about coming back resurfaced, more painful than ever before. With everything going on with Jasper, she needed someone to talk to. Obviously Bella was out. Edward had always been her confidant. He usually experienced it with her, and they were able to dissect the problem together after. Not so now.

She could easily picture him repeatedly picking up the phone only to not call. Especially after what happened the last time. He had to be regretting his rash exodus. He had to!

Now everything depended on when he decided to come back and how he handled the situation once he did.

"No. I can't see him," Alice admitted. Seth seemed disappointed. Alice had forgotten the unlikely friendship that had sprung up between the two after they'd taken on Riley and Victoria together.

"I'm really mad at him right now," Seth whispered, glancing over at the house. They were far enough away that they could barely hear anything going on inside, but Alice knew it was because Edward's actions had hurt Bella. They'd probably seemed like a couple straight out of a fairytale to the young wolf. They certainly had to Alice, and she'd seen a great deal more of the world.

"I think we all are," she said sadly.

"What was he like before Bella?"

"Difficult," Alice said immediately. It was the first word that came to mind to describe her brother. Nothing else seemed to sum him up so neatly.

Seth was watching her, obviously waiting for her to elaborate. Part of her wanted to talk about Edward, share some of the brother she knew with someone that also cared for him. But she was reluctant as well. It hurt to think about him right now, and Alice had always shied away from anything that would cause her pain if she could avoid it.

It was part of why she loved knowing the future. She could avoid the decisions with outcomes that weren't to her liking. Except now with Jasper, of course. Knowledge of the coming changes that would impact the family were already causing her enough pain. She wasn't really in the mood to take on more.

"I thought you were supposed to be the most outgoing Cullen," Seth commented, prodding her to open up. He waited, watching her expectantly.

With an enormous, put-upon sigh, Alice began, "He was very… private. Judgemental. He knew so much of what happened in our lives thanks to his gift, but he didn't like to open up and share about himself. Instead, he'd just tell us how he thought we should fix things to his liking. And he always had to show off and prove that he was the best!" She spoke faster the more she said, waving her hands about to emphasize her words.

"So he really is just like a brother to you," Seth concluded, smiling broadly.

"Yes!"

"Leah can be just as difficult," Seth said with such understanding that Alice felt a kinship forming between them.

"I miss him," she breathed, hardly daring to give voice to the admission.

"Me too," Seth agreed. "I can't believe he left," he added, brow furrowing in confusion.

Alice supposed he'd seen Bella and Edward as a done deal. Together forever. With the way Bella chose Edward over Jacob, the whole pack likely thought that way. Alice knew her family did - at least until last week when he'd taken off.

"Me neither. He's changed everything. I can't even believe… It's all going to be different now that… " Alice started to say, but stopped, realizing she'd almost shared too much. This knowledge was her burden to bear, and hers alone.

"What's it like seeing the future?" Seth asked, understanding that she'd seen something. She was grateful that he didn't pry.

"Unreliable," she said petulantly. Her puckered face made Seth laugh.

"But it's nice having some surprises, right?" he asked, watching her carefully.

"No. I don't like surprises."

Waking up alone as a vampire with no memory of what came before had been enough of a surprise to last eternity. Then her gift had kicked in and she hadn't been surprised since. Well, at least not until Bella came into her life.

"Only because you don't remember how much fun they can be," Seth said seriously, adamantly nodding at her doubting and dismissive look. "Oh, don't look at me like that."

"I - don't - like - them," Alice hissed stubbornly.

"Guess I'll just have to change your mind," Seth said happily, almost eager to accept the challenge.

"Sure, kid," Alice muttered, rolling her eyes.

"I'm not that young," Seth pointed out. Alice looked at him questioningly. Edward had mentioned the wolves wanting Seth to stay out of the fight because he was too young. How old was he now? "Seriously. I turned sixteen a couple weeks ago."

"Infant," Alice declared.

Internally she winced. It did not sit right that she'd been ogling him earlier when he was still so young, even with the Bella and Jake thing when he was still sixteen too. Not that sixteen was ridiculously younger than the nineteen she'd been when turned, but her century of experience made it seem like an even greater difference.

"It's not like I look that young. And I'm like you, not getting any older - ever," Seth intoned defensively, sensing that Alice was brushing him off and sincere in her estimation of his being a child still.

"Hmpt," she said, not wanting to argue the point further just now.

Seth didn't mention it again, and the two sat in companionable silence for several minutes.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No. It aches less when you're near. My mind stops trying to see anything, so it doesn't hurt when it fails to."

"Then I'll stay as long as you want me to."

Seth wasn't restless the way humans typically were. It was peaceful sitting with him. Alice had a feeling he was bursting to talk, but he didn't betray his desire for communication. Ordinarily she'd have been all for it. Not this night though.

Eventually the sky lit, first in shades of grey, then blues and purples as the night gave way to the rising sun. Finally, as the first rays of golden light gilded the forest, bursts of color bloomed to life across the sky until it was painted in pinks, oranges, and reds.

The riot of color was beautiful and happy. Alice smiled. She'd be all right. Even with the changes coming. She'd already managed to go two hours without thinking about it, too caught up in her immediate surroundings.

"Are you worried about Bella?" The question was quiet, barely more than a whisper, yet it echoed after the stillness that had settled over the pair.

"Yes," Alice breathed, nodding and half afraid voicing her fears would bring them into reality. "I don't want to lose her."

"Do you think… Is there a chance she's right? Will she survive this?"

Alice thought back to her earlier visions, and the one she'd had the other day of Jasper and Bella having sex after hunting. There was some strong evidence to suggest she might.

"It's possible," Alice said slowly, drawing the words out.

"You've seen that much at least?" Seth asked excitedly. He was so pure. Honest. Loving. Happy. It was refreshing after being around immortals that tended to become jaded over time.

"Sometimes. It comes and goes. Too much uncertainty because of the… fetus," Alice explained.

"You don't like the baby," Seth remarked intuitively.

"It's hurting my sister," Alice accused.

"It's not doing it on purpose," Seth defended, not unkindly.

"It's too strong… too _other_." It was a little parasite. But she'd never say so aloud.

"Magical. Like us. Like what Bella's always wanted to be," Seth said wonderingly. Magical. Alice supposed that was one way to look at it. The… magical parasite - baby… would be special, there was no doubt about that. Maybe magical was the best way to look at it.

Seth's positive outlook seemed to be rubbing off on her.

"You're so optimistic," she said, nudging his shoulder.

"You usually are too, pixie," Seth said lightly, pointedly nudging her back. Pixie? Had he really just called her that like she was a cute little fairy instead of a ferocious demon?

Alice was about to respond when a noise sounded from inside the house. She was on her feet and looking at the house before a single one of Seth's heartbeats. She needed to get back in and check on Bella. With the rapid changes in her health it wasn't smart to stay away for any length of time.

"I'm going to relieve Jake and Leah so they can get some rest. Tell Bella I'll send Jake along when he wakes," Seth said understandingly.


	5. 5: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 5 - Bella

"Carlisle, is the IV really still necessary?" Bella asked, trying not to sound ungrateful. He'd been trying everything he could think of to get nutrients into her system, but even her desire to do whatever she must to save her baby didn't alter her opinions on needles. She absolutely hated them!

They'd already rearranged the room back to its original layout, mercifully getting rid of the hospital bed. The IV was the last medical reminder that ruined Bella's illusion that they were simply relaxing at home as a family the way they had many times over the summer.

"Honestly, it isn't doing much good. I suppose we might as well take it out," Carlisle agreed, fleeting upstairs and back in well under a minute.

This was the best she'd felt in days. She could actually sit up on her own without Rose or Jasper supporting her. It didn't hurt to breathe as much either. The air was still like sandpaper against her acid-burned throat - too much vomiting had likely done permanent damage to her esophagus and vocal chords - but at least her chest felt like it could actually fill with air now. Before drinking the blood it had felt like a weight was compressing her rib cage, preventing it from expanding.

Her limbs weren't noodles anymore either. She could successfully lift her arm to pull the blanket tighter when Jasper's chilly hand made her shiver. And her head! The starbursts of color had stopped flickering across her vision whenever her head spun with lightheadedness.

Her nudger's bumps against her insides were still granite blows that had her breath catching, but thanks to Jasper those were few and far between. Bella had begun practicing her fake smile when they started hurting about a week ago. She'd gotten so good at hiding it, that she didn't think anyone even noticed when a quick, accidental strike landed anymore.

"You haven't thrown up in hours," Jasper acknowledged, taking a deep breath and turning to look out the window.

"No, everything's staying down now that the baby is getting fed," Bella said in her raspy voice. A frown crinkled her forehead as she watched Jasper's obvious effort to distance himself from what was happening beside him.

Carlisle was waiting, assessing Jasper. When he seemed satisfied, he pulled the long needle from her hand. Bella shifted, swallowing back a whimper, and resisted the urge to twist away from the intrusive metal. How was it possible for such a tiny thing to cause her so much misery? It was a thousand times worse that anything the baby caused her to feel!

Blood welled up at once. The gauze dressing Carlisle pressed to stem the flow of blood from her skin blocked the smell for the most part, but the aroma she did inhale smelled tempting even to Bella's damped human senses. How strange that something that had once caused her to pass out now resulted in a craving that had her salivary glands working overtime.

And how gross was it that part of her was resisting the urge to lick up her own blood? The only thing stopping her was knowing that Emmett would _never_ let her live it down if she went that far. She didn't really want to spend eternity hearing those taunts, particularly if she did repeatedly fail during her newborn year.

Jasper was a block of marble, not even pretending to breathe as Carlisle finished cleaning the puncture and bandaged the spot. Bella hated that she was causing him such discomfort. He already struggled so much.

Sensing her sympathy, Jasper danced his fingers lightly over her belly, not tickling, just reassuring. It made her smile, the little acknowledgement.

Not for a moment did she fear that he'd slip and harm her. Not again. Especially since their talk a few nights back. She had more faith in him than he'd ever seemed to have in himself.

She didn't know what he intended to do next time she drank blood though. He'd said he wasn't leaving again, but she was already starting to feel _thirsty_. Would he really stay beside her when she did or would he go upstairs? She didn't want him to go, but she'd never ask him to stay knowing the pain he'd be in.

"If you're feeling up to it, you should try eating again," Carlisle said, burning the gauze spotted with her blood. It was as if he'd suddenly become the mind reader.

That thought had her spirits spiraling down a narrow abyss. She'd had too much time to think in the days since Edward left. Too much time for self-doubt and self-recriminations. The conclusions she'd drawn were devastating to her very essence. Only the baby gave her a solid reason not to give in to the cloud of depression hovering just at the edge of her consciousness.

For so long she'd feared that she wasn't enough to hold Edward. Always he'd brushed off her fears, calling her absurd or ridiculous - unconsciously making her feel worse about herself. He'd never actually talked to her about those concerns, too caught up in the way he viewed himself to help her overcome her own self-deprecating tendencies. It all fed into her fears that he didn't actually desire her the way she desired him. That the challenge of struggling to be with her, proving his strength of will, was more alluring than _her_. His easy departure seemed proof that her fears had always been justified.

She'd had to spend months begging and bargaining to get him to sleep with her in the first place. It had never been his idea. He'd said all along it wouldn't be possible, but she'd witnessed his control and knew him capable. Then they finally had and he'd regretted it. It hadn't been good enough for him to want a repeat on his own. How pathetic was she that she'd tried and failed to seduce her husband multiple times? She'd had to resort to tears and basically mauling him before he'd given in and made love to her again. Had it all been just to humor her?

Jasper's fingers danced lightly over her abdomen once more, distracting her from the dangerous thoughts. Comfort and… well, not exactly happiness, but close enough penetrated the melancholy. Though it wasn't enough to dispel it entirely.

"What are you hungry for, Bella?" Rosalie asked, standing sentry, ready to get her whatever she'd like. The question stopped her negative thoughts in their tracks. The baby wanted food, needed it. She'd focus only on that. Much safer.

"Actually, I'm… " she trailed off, looking embarrassedly at Jasper.

"You're thirsty," he supplied, nodding and glancing at Rose. "I'm fine. Bring her more blood," he said calmly.

"You don't have to," Bella offered, reaching to touch his cheek just beneath his butterscotch eyes. They lacked the dark circles that indicated true hunger, but they were already a shade or two darker than they'd been after his hunt yesterday.

"Don't worry about me, darlin'," he drawled with a soft smile. "I'm prepared, and I've got some reading to distract me." He held up a book as proof.

"But -"

"Please, Bella. Let me help the baby by staying," he said, using the baby to sway her. It worked - as he knew it would.

"Yes, all right," she grumbled, giving in gracelessly. He chuckled, but opened the book without calling her on it.

"Esme is making you another omelet to try once you've finished this," Rosalie said, handing Bella a freshly warmed cup of O neg.

Bella cradled it carefully. At least she'd regained enough strength to hold the cup for herself. It had been mortifying when Rose had been needed to feed her. She hated feeling helpless.

She glanced at Jasper, but he was flipping quickly through the book on his lap, reading the open pages faster than Bella would have been able to process a single line of the text. There was a stack of at least thirty other books piled beside the couch. She hadn't been paying much attention, but she thought he'd been searching through at least that many each day. The stack looked a bit different today. He'd probably had someone switching the ancient tombs out after he'd finished with them.

A honeyed curl had fallen over his forehead as he bent over the book in his lap. Bella's fingers twitched with the impulse to push it back, out of his way, but she resisted the urge, unsure where it'd come from.

His long, cool fingers rested lightly along the curve of her lower belly, absently moving in response to the baby. Bella's nudger seemed to be keeping a hand against the same area, moving the slightest bit every few minutes as if to get Jasper's attention, and seek the wave of affection and tranquility he'd send to reassure the baby of his presence.

Knowing Jasper would have a diversion to occupy his mind did make it a little easier not to feel guilty for the pain she was putting him in by drinking human blood so close to the Cullen that had always struggled most with maintaining a vegetarian blood diet.

"Thanks, Rose. You're the best," Bella told the beautiful blonde. Rose just smiled serenely, and nodded encouragingly towards the cup, prompting Bella to drink up.

Bella tried to sip it slowly, but found herself practically inhaling the delicious blood. There weren't words to describe the taste. It was ambrosia on her tongue. Instead of salt and rust, it was sweet as honey, but different. Maybe it didn't really have a taste, and that was what made it so intangible. Rather, it was a rightness accompanied by an immense sensation of relief and fullness.

The moans of pleasure that welled up and slipped out between sips had Rose grinning smugly, every bit the cat that ate the canary. But Jasper had stilled. He hadn't moved since her first heady pull from the straw.

It must be so tempting to want to steal the cup from her. To taste the heavenly liquid of human blood. The one thing he craved above all else. Even more so because for once he wouldn't have to deal with the negative effect of feeling his meal's pain and fear as he consumed the person's blood.

Bella was still contemplating his predicament when the straw produced nothing more than air and a few bubbles that popped upon reaching her mouth. The thin membranes contained so little blood that they did more to tease than satisfy.

"Do you want more?" Rose asked immediately.

Bella thought for a moment, assessing her needs then shook her head. While she really wouldn't mind another cup, it seemed unnecessarily cruel to Jasper when she wasn't truly thirsty, not like she'd been before. "No. The omelet does sound good though," Bella said, handing the empty cup off.

"Jasper, can I ask you something?" Bella began tentatively.

He'd gone back to reading once the blood was gone, pretending he'd never faltered. Bella was so close that she could feel his relief. Rarely did he ever let her feel his true emotions. Truthfully, this might be the first time ever. She didn't know if the relief was because the blood was gone or because he'd managed to remain in control of himself - a huge step for him. Perhaps it was both.

"Of course," he said easily, closing his book to give her his full attention. He always did that. It was an unexpected kindness that probably meant more than it should.

"When everyone was getting ready to fight the newborns… _he_ said you considered cheating. Would you really have?" No need to clarify who she meant by _he _or what she meant by cheating.

Jasper huffed, annoyed. "It was only an errant thought. I never would have done it intentionally."

"But it would have made you stronger," Bella pointed out. "Made it easier to fight them."

"It's not actually that big of a difference," he corrected. "And it's not worth it."

"What's it like?"

"The blood or the guilt?"

"Both," she replied immediately, always eager to learn more about the world she wished to be a part of, and excited Jasper was actually willing to answer her questions. The others all hedged, even Carlisle and Alice did most of the time out of respect for Edward's wishes.

"The blood, human blood, is the only balm for the never-ending scorch. Our throats, you'll find," he paused to share a smile with her. It was nice knowing he still believed she'd one day know for herself. He continued, "always burns. It's worse the longer you go without. It's near enough to the burn of changing - you remember that from James's bite?" When she nodded, he went on. "That pain remains concentrated in our throats. Only human blood alleviates it. Temporarily at least. That's why it is our natural food source."

He was sharing more than Edward ever willingly had. Edward hadn't wanted this life for her and had believed keeping her ignorant would prevent it from happening or dim her enthusiasm for it. He'd been wrong. Jasper's honesty only served to help prepare her.

Not to mention it proved his respect for her. Edward's sheltering attitude had always secretly made her feel like he saw her as a child not worthy of knowing what the grown-ups did. His deliberate attempts to keep her ignorant also meant it was easier for him to make decisions - important decisions - on her behalf. It had rankled, but she'd always just been so happy to be with him that she'd let it go without doing more than voicing a few feeble protests. It was so completely opposite of how Jasper was treating her now - as though she deserved to have all of the information. As though she was intelligent enough to process it and form her own opinions.

Bella wasn't sure why, but the discrepancies left her floundering. There was an importance to the difference that was just out of reach. She just couldn't quite grasp what it meant.

Rose returned with the cheese omelet, sitting on the arm of the sofa and running her nails through Bella's hair. It was soothing and had her eyes closing like a cat being pet. Bella had no doubt Rose had heard the conversation. The whole family likely had, but she didn't seem inclined to interrupt, just listen and silently support Bella.

"And the guilt?" Bella asked, not able to think on the subject of Jasper's respect for her anymore just yet.

She took a bite of eggs as she waited for his response. They were tasty - far superior to any she'd ever made for herself. People on death row might prefer steak and lobster. But for Bella it would be eggs all the way. That was her idea of a last meal.

"The blood is more potent, more quenching, when it comes from a living person. But that means having to feel every single second of that person's terror and pain as I fed from them. The regret of missed opportunities. The grief of people left behind. It meant having to experience the dreaded anticipation of the moment of death as I murdered someone," Jasper said, staring vacantly into the distance, haunted by the ghosts of his past. "It's not something that gets easier with time either."

"Does the guilt ever go away?" Bella asked, wondering if she'd ever get over accidentally killing someone once she was turned.

Jasper turned to look her in the eye. The intensity of his stare capturing her in an inevitable tractor beam. "I remember each and every one of my mea-victims. Even the ones that I killed during my frenzied newborn year." There was a solemnity to him that was impossible to discount or ignore.

"Perfect recall," Bella whispered, her heart going out to him. It must be difficult enough knowing you've taken a life, but to be forced to live with the pain of experiencing it…

"The guilt adds up until you fear suffocating under the weight of it. It's an agony that I will bear all of my days," Jasper finished. Bella saw his hatred directed internally. His past was hindering his future.

"It's not your fault. You didn't know there was another way. Once you did, you chose to stop. You should forgive yourself and focus on that. Let go of the past," Bella said, trying to help him do just that.

"I've slipped," he said immediately, not trying to deny or hide his wrongdoings.

"No one is perfect," she said, waving away his attempt to condemn himself. She'd had enough practice with Edward that she found herself on familiar ground when he did. She'd never see any of the Cullens as a monster. It just wasn't possible - no matter how much Edward wished she would.

Unlike Edward, who would have gotten angry when she argued, Jasper took her hand, squeezing gently and letting her feel his gratitude. He didn't say the words, just let her experience his undiluted emotions.

It was raw and genuine. And so much more honest than the placating words she was used to during a debate such as this.

* * *

The events of the morning and past several days weighed heavily on Bella. Everyone was doing so much to help Bella hold herself together. She felt guilty putting everyone out the way she was.

But she hated the times they weren't trying to distract her even more. It gave Bella too much time to think. Too much time to remember. They weren't pleasant memories either.

After Italy, Edward promised not to leave again unless Bella sent him away. He'd broken that promise. There were so many times that he'd threatened to leave. They all seemed like hints now. His way of preparing her for what he'd always planned to do.

No wonder he'd fought so hard against her becoming a vampire. He'd probably never really planned to spend more than a human lifespan with her.

Bella had once wanted to be turned into a vampire so that she'd be able to chase Edward if he left again. No matter how far he ran, she'd be able to keep up and find him. She'd have time and the necessary skills. That all seemed a bit ridiculous now. What was the point of chasing someone that didn't want you? She didn't want to be that pitiful, clingy ex that didn't know when to let go.

Her dark musings were interrupted by her baby pressing rather insistently on her bladder.

"Rose… I need," Bella began awkwardly. She didn't have to finish her explanation before Rose was lifting her easily and carrying her to the bathroom.

This had the be the tenth time today that she'd needed to go. The liquid diet definitely had a few disadvantages.

Bella's breath caught as the baby shifted. Her little nudger wasn't so little anymore and each movement felt like she was driving head first into a brick building and having an airbag explode in her face - shocking and painful. She welcomed the pain though. It was proof that her baby was alive and thriving.

When Carlisle first informed her that she and the baby were slowly starving to death, she cursed herself for being so weak. It was her pathetic humanness that meant she wasn't able to give her child what it needed. She'd felt like a failure and feared that she really might not be strong enough to hold on long enough.

"All done?"

"For now at least," Bella grumbled, catching her breath when Rose's step jostled her broken rib. A bright flash of sharp white pain momentarily blinded her.

Rose was chuckling over her comment when Bella's senses returned. Bella was proud of herself. She'd gotten so good at masking her pain from the others.

"It's normal. All pregnant women have to urinate frequently," Rose said happily. Her tinkling voice had the baby shifting again. Bella wondered if he could distinguish who was who. Studies had shown that babies could while still in the womb, right?

"Then I guess I'll just have to look forward to a repeat an hour from now," Bella sighed.

Jasper laughed quietly as they entered the room, but his eyes were on her belly rather than her. Bella willed him to feel her curiosity. She wanted to be let in on the joke.

His eyes snapped to hers immediately, eyebrow raising as he tasted her emotions. He seemed to be getting better at reading them, because suddenly he was grinning and explaining, "The baby is annoyed that I didn't go with."

"It was only two minutes," Bella remarked, blinking in surprise.

"It likes the attention I give it," Jasper said knowingly. Bella had already suspected that, but it was nice to know Jasper thought the same.

They shared a grin over how the baby already had them all wrapped around its fingers.

Rose had just gotten Bella settled comfortably on the couch when Alice came slowly down the stairs. She sat at Bella's feet without a word, leaning easily against her legs, face scrunched with pain.

Bella hated seeing her best girlfriend suffering. Alice seemed lost without her visions. Then there was the fact that Bella was monopolizing Jasper's time as well.

At first when Alice suggested Jasper stay close, Bella thought it was because both Alice _and_ Jasper were going to be staying with her. It quickly became apparent, however, that Alice didn't want to be near Bella while she was pregnant. Each day Alice spent less and less time around her. Alice's actions stung, but Bella couldn't blame her. She was the reason for Alice's pain, after all.

Bella lightly laid a hand on Alice's shoulder, trying to offer what comfort she could. Alice absently reached up to pat Bella's hand, but still she didn't speak.

"Have you seen him at all?" Bella finally asked. It was her first time doing so, voluntarily seeking an update or any information at all really. Everyone had been walking on eggshells to avoid mentioning Edward around her.

"Yes," Alice chirped simply. They lapsed into silence once more.

"Alice, is he coming back?" Bella finally demanded. She needed to know. The waiting game did nothing but allow her doubts and insecurities time to grow faster than her expanding belly was. Pretty soon they'd be so prolific that the path from her head to her heart would be impassable.

"I'm not sure. He keeps changing his mind." The vague answers were driving her insane.

What did she mean he kept changing his mind? Did Edward feel obligated to stay with her because of the baby? It wouldn't be fair to make him remain with her if she wasn't what he really wanted.

Did he hate her for choosing the baby over him? For making a decision that affected both of them without consulting him first? That she could understand. He'd done it to her enough times to know how infuriating it could be. But was it enough to have him changing his mind about wanting her forever?

It already seemed so unlikely that he'd want her forever. Tenuous at best. Had her decision ruined the already precarious hold she'd had over him?

"How is it so easy for him to leave me?" Bella asked. The words, like her emotions and body, were as delicate as blown glass.

"He does love you, Bella," Jasper whispered, picking up on her doubts. Part of her, a part that seemed to get nurtured far too often until it was an overgrown garden of weeds - much like the one currently consuming her by turns - didn't believe him. "Trust me."

"Not enough. Not as much as I loved him," Bella whispered, shaking her head and looking from Jasper to Alice and back again.

Bella noted that Jasper didn't correct her impression that she'd loved Edward more than he'd loved her, and he'd have been in the best position to know.

"He's afraid of losing you," Jasper explained instead.

"Then he shouldn't have left," Bella said stubbornly, crossing her arms over her bloated belly and scowling like a child throwing a tantrum. "He can't keep me if he isn't here."

"Maybe… maybe you two just aren't meant to be together. I know you love each other - everyone can see that - but sometimes that isn't enough, and two people just can't make it work for whatever reason. There are so many obstacles that he just can't get past," Alice said slowly, quietly, head bowed. "This could be a sign that you need to let him go and move on."

Panic had Bella breathing faster. Jasper took her hand in his free one, anchoring her to the moment.

"Alice, you did see something, didn't you," Bella accused. She wanted to demand an explanation, beg for answers, see the truth in Alice's mind for herself. If prying open Alice's head would reveal what she knew, Bella would hunt down a pickaxe immediately.

"Bella, you know my visions are subjective. If someone changes their mind the future changes with it," Alice said in a clipped, reprimanding tone. It did little to deter Bella.

"You're not answering me."

"I am. I'm telling you the final decisions haven't been made yet. It can go either way depending on what each of you does," Alice said, standing and leaving the room to prevent any further discussion on the subject.

Bella wished she could follow, chase her down, but she couldn't. She looked at Jasper, ready to ask him what he made of Alice's cryptic comments, but she saw the worried frown he wore as he stared after his wife's retreating back and decided to let it go.

* * *

"You came back," Bella said, amazed to see Jacob standing in the Cullen's family room.

He wasn't the one she expected to return, though he should have been. After all, Jake was the one that came back despite Sam's order for him to stay away. Edward - the name was less devastating to think of with the rest of her chosen family surrounding her - was the one that left, and she'd had to go after him.

"What can I say? I make a great punching bag," Jacob said dryly.

It hurt that he thought she saw him that way. But really, what else was he supposed to think after the way she'd dragged him along? Guilt weighed heavily on her. If only she'd voiced more of her thoughts and concerns. Maybe then they wouldn't have gotten off track so completely. Maybe if she'd said everything she thought during those months before Edward's return, including her fears of losing his friendship, maybe then they'd have always been just friends the way they were supposed to be.

"Jake," Bella begged, "please don't say that. I'm sorry. I'm -"

"Chill, Bella. It was just a joke," Jacob muttered, moving further into the room and sitting beside her.

"I didn't expect to see you again," Bella admitted, smiling when Jake automatically took her hand in his. He didn't even seem to think about his actions. She was still his Bella. For a little longer at least.

Bella hadn't realized just how much she'd needed to find some stable ground in the midst of everything else that was changing. Absently she touched her growing stomach. Some changes were more welcome than others.

"Yeah, me, either," Jake said, seeming slightly stunned that he was there himself.

"I'm sorry you had to break from the pack. I never would have asked you to do that," Bella said.

Jacob gave her a look that suggested otherwise. Bella winced, knowing he was right to doubt her words. Hadn't she taken drastic measures before to protect the people she loved? And those people had nothing on her feelings for her child.

"S'okay. It was probably only a matter of time till I snapped over something Sam wanted me to do," Jacob said, shrugging casually.

"And Seth," Bella reminded him. She almost mentioned Leah too, but she didn't want to think too much about Leah being just outside. The wolf hated vampires. Bella was worried she had an ulterior motive. Though surely Jasper would have sensed it if that were the case.

"He's actually happy to help. He _likes_ this lot around here."

"I hate causing you trouble," Bella said, disentangling her hand from Jacob's so she could reach for her cup of blood.

She'd been about to drink another cup when he'd walked in, but his appearance had distracted her. The baby was not so easily deterred. Her nudger pushed insistently against her side, careful but relentless. Jasper's fingers had glided over the spot, sending a cool chill ghosting along her spine. The pair's actions reminder her that she was thirsty.

"I'm used to it by now. It'd be stranger if you weren't," Jake said honestly.

"Jake -"

"You're really drinking blood? Gettin' a jump start on being a leech?" he interrupted, not wanting to hear anymore apologies if she had to guess, and suddenly realizing what was in the cup she held.

Bella ignored the insult and explained, "The baby needs it."

Jacob grimaced, eyeing the cup wearily as if it were a bomb.

"Ugh. That's disgusting," Jacob said, shifting farther away and looking as though he'd hurl any moment. Bella frowned, self-conscious all over again. A growl sounded from somewhere in the house, and Jake immediately backtracked, "but you need it, so drink up, Bells. Don't mind me."

Bella looked to Jasper for an explanation, but he just rolled his eyes and nudged her to get her started. She immediately felt guilty. He'd been holding his breath, waiting for her to finish this entire time. Quickly, she sucked the cooling liquid from the cup. Only briefly did she allow herself to savor the thick, tangy fluid before swallowing. It was a cross between hot chocolate and maple syrup in its consistency and sweetness.

Jake turned his focus on Rose, glaring at her hovering form while Bella finished her cup of blood. He didn't say anything, refraining for her sake she was sure, but his expression was rather telling. Bella figured the new target for his animosity was partly because Edward wasn't around to hate on, and to keep his mind off what she was currently consuming.

Bella was immensely grateful that neither one began antagonizing the other. She really couldn't handle the stress of playing mediator just now. And if Jake took it too far, which knowing him was very likely, Emmett would find it necessary to involve himself and it would escalate before she knew it.

"I'm so happy you're here, Jake," Bella whispered once she'd finished. Rosalie took the empty cup, touching Bella's shoulder approvingly as she did.

"You wanted me here," Jacob said, sighing tiredly.

"I know. But you didn't have to come, because it's not fair for me to want you here. I would have understood."

"Can I ask you something?" he asked, looking uncertain if he actually wanted the answer or not. Rose returned, handing her cup back freshly filled with more warm blood.

"Of course," Bella replied, sipping from her cup, and flushing when Jake made a gagging sound as he watched.

"Why _do_ you want me here? I don't get it. Every time I walk in the door, you - you smile like I'm your favorite person in the world."

"You're one of them," Bella acknowledged, not understanding the intense joy she experienced every time he got close to her. She was just as baffled as him. Not that he wasn't her best friend, and he was right that she did love him in a way, but this felt so much more intense - just not romantic intense.

"But why? After everything… "

"It feels… complete when you're here, Jacob. Like all my family is together. I mean, I guess that's what it's like - I've never had a big family before now. It's nice. But it's just not whole unless you're here."

"Family?" He looked like he'd just accidentally guzzled down battery acid.

"You were always supposed to be part of my life - I can feel that, and so can you. Family. Not the roles we were trying to force ourselves into, but family somehow."

"That's what you're going with? How about -"

Alice came quietly into the room, sitting near Jake without saying a word. Jasper had mentioned something earlier about how the wolves made her head better, so it made sense she'd seek out Jake's company.

Jacob looked like he was choking on his response, and Bella shivered awaiting the accusations he was sure to make. Ones she knew she deserved. Jasper readjusted the blanket covering Bella, mistaking her shake as an indication of being cold. The action caught Jacob's attention, and he watched distrustfully. Bella wished there was an easy way to explain everything Jasper had been sacrificing and doing to make things easier for her, but Jake would never get it. He was too prejudice against the Cullens.

"Great. Family," Jacob finally muttered. The words were brittle and resentful. It hurt, but she took the blows as her due anyways. They had to be better than what he'd truly wanted to say. "What's with the new arm candy?" Jake asked suddenly, eyeing Jasper warily.

"Don't call him that. He's helping me," Bella reprimanded, weakly swatting Jacob's arm with her free hand and taking another large gulp from her cup.

"You two seem… close," Jacob pressed.

None of the others in the room weighed in on the conversation. They'd been very good about letting Bella at least have the illusion of privacy since she was confined to the main room and no one particularly wanted to leave her side while there was so much going on. Not that it would have mattered. They'd have heard everything she had to say regardless of which room they were in.

"He helps the baby stay calm, so it doesn't move as much. And the baby likes him being close," Bella said a bit defensively. She didn't appreciate the way Jake was glancing between Jasper and herself, as if something untoward was happening.

"Sure, sure," Jake said placatingly. He shook his head and rolled his eyes though, making it clear he didn't buy the story.

"Don't be like that, Jake," Bella begged, resting her hand on his arm. He didn't look at her, so she tugged it as hard as she could. His arm didn't budge, but he did turn back to face her again.

Jacob was abnormally serious when he asked, "Have you considered that he might just be the one that kills you - before _it_ gets the chance? He already tried once, didn't he?"

"I won't hurt Bella or the baby," Jasper answered for Bella. A heavy sense of knowing sincerity filled the room with his words. It was the first time Jasper had spoken while Bella was drinking blood. He didn't even seem to notice the near empty cup.

"I'll kill you if you try," Jake vowed. Bella's breath caught at the sudden pronouncement.

"Agreed," Jasper replied before Bella could mediate the situation. The two men shared a lethal smile, having come to an understanding her mind couldn't quite comprehend.

She didn't know if Jasper was agreeing to let Jacob kill him should he try to hurt Bella - not that she really believed there was any risk of that happening - or if Jasper was returning the threat. It would be just her luck if it was both. Edward wasn't around for Jake to fight with, so of course he'd want to start in on someone else. Better Jasper than Rosalie. At least Jasper wouldn't deliberately try to kill her best friend. Bella wasn't sure she could guarantee the same of Rose.

"Jake, please don't -"

"You worry too much, Bella," Jacob said dismissively.

Why couldn't they all just get along? Didn't they realized how much she loved each person here, and needed all of them in her life? Must there always be so much aggression and hostility?

And what was with the mutual smile?

Her tired mind gave up part way through the process of sorting through the underlying meaning, and she'd drifted off to sleep without having the chance to attempt to reign the two in.

* * *

"I want to call my dad," Bella announced to the room at large. She'd just finished another meal. Another successful one that she'd managed to keep down. It made her optimistic.

"That might not be the best idea," Jasper said softly when it appeared that no one else planned to respond or even acknowledge her.

"I've been thinking about it," Bella admitted, leaning more heavily against him. It was stifling in the room, especially with her feet in Jacob's lap. She refused to move them though. If she did he'd likely take it as a sign that his presence was no longer wanted or needed. That was the furthest thing from the truth. "Why can't I still talk to him after I've turned?"

No one seemed willing to answer her - again - each reluctant to cause her pain. Or risk disputing something that they figured Edward had already discussed with her.

"Bella… " Jake started, squeezing her toes. It tickled and she jerked. Jasper leaned forward around Bella to glare at the wolf, his hand rubbing small circles across her belly, ensuring the baby didn't get riled up in response.

"No, hear me out," Bella said, pushing her point. "I know I can't see him right away, and we can only drag it out so long… but can't I at least talk to him on the phone afterwards? Then, when I'm in control, see him occasionally? At least for a few more years - that's all it can be with me not aging. And I don't have to tell him anything, just let him draw his own wrong conclusions," Bella said growing more excited by the possibility as she spoke. "And he can meet his grandchild. I'm sure we can come up with a way to explain the baby."

"We may be -" Carlisle began, face pinched.

"You can't, Bella," Jasper interrupted, scowling at Carlisle.

"Why not? Carlisle -"

"He's only saying that because he doesn't want to upset you," Jasper confessed.

"Then _you_ tell me the truth, Jasper," Bella insisted.

"Your voice will be remarkably different, enough that you won't be able to fool Charlie. And your appearance… there'll be no hiding that," Jasper explained, being very upfront with her. "You'll be too _other_. It'll only upset him. And involving him will be too dangerous for us and for him. You're on the Volturi's radar - you can't take chances."

"Oh." Jasper winced. The depth of disappointment she must be projecting was likely staggering. "Thank you for being honest with me," she said, trying to reign her emotions in a bit for his sake.

"I always will," Jasper said, nodding.

Esme was watching their interaction intently, her head tilted and a puzzled expression on her face. Bella wondered if she too was noting how different the conversation would have gone were Edward here, or if it was just her. Edward would have either put his foot down without explanation or he'd have caved and given her whatever she wanted despite the impact it would have later. For all his talk of compromise, it had always been all or nothing with him.

"Can I at least talk to him now? Say goodbye or something?" Bella asked quietly. She didn't know how she was supposed to do that, but it didn't feel right to not even try.

"Yes, you should talk to him now while you still can," Jasper agreed, nodding and looking to Carlisle.

"What's she supposed to say? Or does she just string him along a bit?" Jake demanded, sounding angry.

"He'll be able to tell she's sick. That much is easy to detect. We can use that as an excuse. Carlisle's already told him that she's contracted an illness and is at a special center in Atlanta. At least this way she has a chance to prepare him and say goodbye," Jasper said defensively. "It's a good idea to protect all of our covers."

"You expect her to tell him she's _dying_ so that your _cover_ isn't blown?" Jake said incredulously, looking around the room for support and balling his fists when he found none.

"Jake, it's a good idea. It's important not to draw any unnecessary suspicions. Charlie's a cop," Bella explained. "And I do want to say goodbye at the very least."

"It's her decision," Alice said, giving Jacob a very pointed look that had him snapping his mouth shut with an audible click. Bella's teeth hurt just hearing it, and she wondered what that whole interaction had been about. She didn't have the energy to question them though.

"That's right. It's my decision, and I think this is best," Bella said, injecting as much steel into her voice as she could in its battered and abused state.

"I'm going to run patrol," Jacob said stiffly, carefully shifting her feet from his lap and standing. "Seth and Leah both need a break."

"You'll come back?" Bella asked immediately, dreading the idea that she'd finally managed to chase him away for good. Jake stopped in the doorway to look back at her. His expression practically screamed exasperation.

"If you want me to," he said after giving her a once over.

"Of course I do, Jake. I always want you here," she said, trying to smile at him. He would always be her sun. "Besides, I might get cold again."

Jake look around at everyone like he wished someone would save him or put him out of his misery or tell him this was all just a nightmare. No one said a word, all still too reluctant to speak up and cause Bella unnecessary distress.

"Sure, sure. See you in a bit," Jake muttered, shaking his head and returning her smile. It resembled a grimace and betrayed not a hint of actual happiness.

Bella tried to ignore how much it hurt to still be the one inflicting pain on Jacob. She didn't understand why it was happening, but she seemed incapable of preventing it. Closing her eyes, Bella released a heavy sigh. Weariness weighed her down making her reluctant to open her eyes again.

"Would you like to wait and do this later?" Jasper inquired quietly. She looked at him and discovered he was already holding a phone, offering it to her questioningly.

"No. Let's go ahead and get this over with," Bella said, feeling resigned. She dialed the familiar number to her father's house. Cradling the phone between her neck and ear, she listened as it rang, half hoping he'd be at work or fishing so he wouldn't be there to answer her call. Why had she been so insistent on doing this? Bella honestly couldn't remember her reasonings just now as nerves fluttered low in her belly, wrestling with her baby.

Jasper unexpectedly took her hand as she waited, and tendrils of reassurance and support wove around her to fight off the worst of the anxiety and sadness that accompanied making this call. She squeezed his hand in thanks, hoping he felt her gratitude for the silent aid.

"Hello?" Charlie answered in his usual gruff manner.

"Hi, Dad." Bella very nearly choked on the greeting.

"Bella, what's going on? Carlisle said you're sick - quarantined - and that I can't see you," Charlie said quickly, sounding angrier with each word. Fear coated the words like deadly poison. Bella closed her eyes against the wave of sadness that washed over her as she mentally prepared for what she knew she'd have to say.

"He's right. I'm sorry. They won't let me see anyone," she whispered, pressing the heel of her free hand to her eyes to block the tears forming against her will. Not exactly a lie either. Charlie must have heard the ring of truth because his response was slow in coming.

"When will they let you? I'm flying down there -"

"Don't. I-I don't think… Dad, don't come here. If I get better you can, but don't come now. There's no point," she said, tears stinging her eyes and burning her face as they slid over her cheeks and passed the dam her hand was attempting to create. Bella tried to swallow them back, but more kept coming. They were quickly becoming a deluge.

"Damn it, Bells. How bad is this?"

"It's bad, Dad. Carlisle called in a lot of favors to get me help, but it's n-not looking g-good," she said brokenly, no longer fighting the tears.

"I can't lose you, Bells. You gotta hang in there," Charlie begged. His plea threatened to break her. Jasper's arm slipped around her, pulling her close and cocooning her in support with his emotional web.

"I promise I'll try. I love you, Dad," Bella said, preparing to hang up. She'd done what she set out to do.

"What's Edward got to say about all this? When will he be back here for me to talk to about what's happening?" Charlie demanded. The reminder of Edward was a blow to her chest. She was not braced for the impact of hearing his name and it knocked the wind from her lungs. Only Jasper's gift allowed her to recover and answer in a way that would protect the family. Their protection had to be her first priority during this call.

"He's not handling it well. If I don't - I don't think he'll ever go back to Forks," Bella informed him. Carlisle's approving nod told her she'd said the correct thing. It was a small comfort.

"Bella… "

"I have to go. The doctors need to run a few more tests. I'll call again if I can. I love you. Bye, Dad," Bella said, hanging up before he could respond. Now, more than ever, she really couldn't remember why she'd wanted to do that in the first place.

"Thank you," she cried into Jasper's shoulder, burying her face against his chest and breathing in his comforting southern scent of magnolias and candied pecans.

* * *

Bella had slept for hours after her call to Charlie. Jasper's attempts to keep the baby calm and lethargic often meant Bella was as well. Carlisle said it was a good thing. Her body was working overtime to keep up with all the changes, and the extra sleep was helping her recharge enough to maintain the process.

When she finally woke, eyes gluey and bits of crust trying to seal her lids permanently shut, it was to find her family playing _Sorry! _against the background of a college football game on the tv. Bella blinked, rubbing her eyes to unstick them, and looked around. It was Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, and Jake, of all people, playing.

"You came back," Bella said immediately, unexpected joy nearly making the dreaded tears start up again.

"Yep," Jacob said, dragging out the p sound before letting it end on a pop. He looked less than thrilled, but the important thing was that he was there.

"You're playing a board game with them?" Bella couldn't help but ask.

"It was this or wrestle the big one," he muttered, jabbing a thumb in Emmett's direction. "Figured you'd get all upset and stupidly worried over that, so game it is." The sarcastic reply made Bella smile.

"You want to wrestle, dog? Let's go!" Emmett said eagerly, clearly loving the prospect.

Bella's heart gave a lurch. Their antagonism meant that there was no way they'd be able to keep it friendly. What if Jake got hurt?

"Shhh, Bella. It's all right. No one is wrestling," Jasper quickly reassured her, patting her shoulder and glaring warningly at the others.

"I think it's time we start considering names," Rosalie interrupted, redirecting the conversation to safer topics. Away from Emmett doing something dangerous and talk that upset Bella, and therefore the baby.

"Have you told her your suspicions yet?" Jasper asked. Bella was sure she'd slipped and referred to the baby as a boy, but she hadn't come right out and told anyone except Jasper what she thought she was having - not that Rose hadn't overheard the conversation. Everyone in the house except Jake had.

"No," Bella said, feeling her cheeks heat with a telltale blush. "I think it's a boy. I-I have a feeling," she explained, not wanting to share too much about the dreams she'd been having. They were too private. But the thought of her green-eyed baby made her smile.

"Have you already picked something out then?" Rosalie asked encouragingly.

"I've been playing around with a few things. At first I thought EJ. I wanted to name him after Edward. It was his father's name too," Bella began, looking around at the others. Emmett was frowning. She couldn't tell why.

The idea of naming her son after Edward was a shot through the heart. It no longer appealed to her because the name Edward would forever remind her of this time in her life. She didn't want to experience pangs of sadness when she thoughts of her child.

"You've changed your mind?" Jasper asked.

"No, not changed it necessarily, but what about CJ?" Bella inquired, hoping for some input from the others. After everything with Edward she didn't necessarily trust her own opinion on something this important.

"What does the C stand for?" Rosalie asked.

At the same time Jacob asked, suspicion clear, "And why is there a J in both choices?" Jake's eyes darted to Jasper. The movement was brief, but Bella registered it.

"For you, Jake. You're my best friend," Bella said warmly, smiling fondly at her friend, and making it clear the honor was for him alone.

"Super. I get a mutant span named after me. Great," Jacob said darkly. The rejection had Bella wrapping her arms snugly around the baby, attempting to shield it from the harsh barb of Jake's bitter words.

"The C?" Jasper asked, effectively distracting Bella from her hurt feelings.

"Charlie and Carlisle both have names starting with C," Bella explained. "I hadn't decided what it stands for yet. Or even if I want something other than EJ, but it's a possibility," she finished, shrugging a little and rubbing her belly. Her fingers met Jasper's and he linked his pinky with hers. Goosebumps broke out along the surface of her arms and a small shiver ran down her spine, but she wasn't cold.

"What if you're wrong?" Jake asked with a lengthy sigh, as if he expected nothing else. He looked like he was biting his tongue to keep from adding, '_Like you were about everything else.'_

When Bella didn't immediately respond, too focused on Jasper's hand and Jacob's opinion, Emmett said, "I think he means what if it's a little girl in there? That's what Seth thinks you're having."

He did? Bella hadn't realized they discussed her baby's gender among themselves. It had probably happened during one of her many naps.

"I kicked a few things around. Playing with Renee and Esme. I was thinking… Ruh-_nez_-may," Bella explained, hoping they liked the idea of honoring both sides of her family. Bella loved the idea of joining human and vampire, having both sides represented as they were within the baby itself.

"Ruhnezmay?" Rosalie repeated, smiling brilliantly.

"R-e-n-e-s-m-e-e. Too weird?" Bella asked, concerned as she looked around at the assembled group.

"No, I like it," Rose said quickly, leaning against Emmett. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and dropped a light kiss on her head. "It's beautiful. And one of a kind, so that fits," she added, looking more content than Bella had ever seen her look before.

"What do you think, Jazz?" Bella asked, glancing up at him. A spark of pleasure stroked lightly along her skin where they were touching. She had a feeling he was more pleased by her use of his nickname, something she'd never done prior to now, than her desire for his opinion.

"That I hope you're wrong," Jasper said seriously.

"What?" Bella asked, crestfallen.

"I hope it's Renesmee and not CJ in there. The kid deserves a full name - not initials," Jasper teased, making her chuckle.

"Seriously? _Renesmee_?" Jacob asked, drawing the name out like it was a foreign disease instead of a cute, if a little different, baby name. "I think I'll stick with hoping it's a bouncing, bloodsucking boy just so it doesn't get stuck with that name."

For once, Bella only smiled when Emmett punched Jacob's arm with more force than was strictly necessary. And she was definitely temporarily deaf when he howled out a few choice curse words from the pain of the blow. Though Esme's chiding reprimand that came floating down the stairs surly meant she wasn't as selectively deaf.


	6. 6: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 6 - Jasper

Bella was sleeping. Again. He missed talking to her, but she rarely seemed to stay awake long enough to engage in meaningful conversation anymore. She'd been sleeping close to fifteen hours a day this last week, some days closer to eighteen.

Jasper had heard Carlisle tell Bella not to worry, it was her body's way of accommodating the additional stress her various systems were experiencing. But secretly, Jasper thought his gift might have more to do with it than anything else. He'd been trying to keep the baby lethargic so it wouldn't move so much and accidentally hurt Bella. Part of that was likely getting absorbed by her as well.

The fever had kicked in almost a day ago. Carlisle hoped it was just a normal human cold. Bella had been switching between pressing her body against Jasper when the fever had her sweating, and holding Jacob or Seth's hand when the shivers started. It was convenient having both available to help her balance the crazy body temperature swings.

"Are you ready to share what has you so upset?" Jasper asked when he heard Alice's distinctive light tread coming down the stairs. He spoke low so as not to wake Bella.

He hadn't seen Alice since yesterday when Bella called Charlie. He had a feeling she was avoiding him. Her conversation with Bella about Edward hadn't sat well with him. She was hiding things from him. Important things.

"Have you ever wondered if the path you're on is the best one for you?" Alice asked softly, perching herself on the arm of the sofa.

"Why would you even ask that?" he asked, stunned. She knew how he'd struggled before meeting her. She'd been the one to introduce him to this lifestyle. She'd given him a family to protect.

"Have you?" she repeated.

"No. I couldn't have taken much more when we met. You saved me," Jasper reminded her. He had been near to picking a fight and deliberately trying to lose for the first time ever. The guilt and struggle with no positive offset was getting to be too much. A tedious, ceaseless, loop of pain and misery. His existence had begun to feel pointless, and he hadn't seen a way to make it better. No future prospects.

"I just showed you new possibilities. You chose to embrace them. But what about this path?"

"Alice, what are you really asking?" Jasper demanded, not wanting to play games. He didn't care for what she seemed to be suggesting, nor did he have the patience for her to drag out explaining. Worry pooled uneasily low in his gut, twisting and coiling like a snake primed to strike.

"What if you could take a different path?"

Jasper judged the distance Alice had deliberately placed between their bodies. He considered the way she'd rejected him after their hunt, and had made no attempt to touch or kiss or make love to him since Edward and Bella's wedding. Before really. Because even during the weeks leading up to the big event, planning had consumed all of her time.

Always Alice had understood that his past meant he needed positive, affectionate or loving emotions and actions. He needed to feel loved, desired, and happy. He needed to experience those feelings more than most. The emotions were like a drug to him, and depression was quick to claim him when he didn't have them. Maria's manipulation and the years of isolation following that experience - because Peter and Charlotte spent more time alone than with him when they traveled together - had shaped him.

Now that she was withholding, Jasper feared he'd become a burden to Alice. His unquenchable need demanding too much from her. She was no longer up to enabling him.

Being with him physically was often a challenge for Alice. Her visions meant she was easily consumed or lost to the future at inconvenient times.

As vampires, they were capable of doing multiple things at once without much difficulty. But Alice's visions always took up the dominant portion of her brain when they happened. It made the physical act of sex far less enjoyable for her than it should be, despite Jasper's gift being able to heighten what she did feel. Her mind was forever preoccupied, while his was predominantly centered around pleasure and the pursuit of it.

After hunting was usually the only time she could really enjoy it because it was fast and hard. Even then they could become truncated events. The brevity of those few passionate encounters seemed almost like a race to finish before the next vision descended. Exciting, yet taxing on the overall health of their relationship.

Regardless of the difficulties, Alice had always striven to give him what he needed - until now.

"You're… unhappy," he guessed, turning to face her more fully even while the majority of his brain remained focused on monitoring Bella's breathing, heartbeat, and temperature, as well as the heartbeat and mood of her child.

Alice wanted him to take a different path because Jasper had failed her in some way. That's what these last weeks had been about. If only he had tried harder for her. She deserved so much, and he had obviously let her down.

He swallowed the thick venom filling his mouth and dejectedly asked, "With me or being here?"

If he was the problem he would try to be better. Do more. Whatever it took, whatever she wanted.

She'd always been so disappointed when he struggled to resist human blood. Hadn't he done better though these last couple days? He'd stayed by Bella when she was drinking human blood and not once caused a problem.

Was there some other way he'd let her down? Nothing came to mind, but then she'd never once admitted to being unhappy during their time together, though he'd occasionally sensed it from her when he'd messed up or not been demonstrative enough with the gifts she so cherished.

If it was this place… he hated considering that. He didn't want to leave. He loved the Cullens even if he had a difficult time expressing it. But he'd go if that's what Alice wanted. If she wanted to follow after Edward, the brother she loved so dearly, he'd do it. He owed her that. He owed her -

"Neither. But I saw something," she said, breaking into his thoughts. Part of his mind was still running through ways he may have screwed up that she was just being kind by not telling him about, but he also managed to focus on what she could have possibly seen.

Alice stayed quiet, not elaborating. Bella snored softly beside them. She'd never snored before her pregnancy. He idly wondered if it was normal for such a thing to develop or if it was one more thing that made her pregnancy unusual.

"You have to talk to me, sweetheart. I can't read your mind," Jasper coaxed, needing to know what she'd seen that had her this out of sorts.

"I saw you happy, Jazz," she whispered, shoulders curled in on herself so that she appeared even smaller than usual.

"I am happy, Alice," Jasper said, reaching out to her. She ignored his hand, shaking her head at him.

"No… I saw you _happy_. In a way I've never seen before," she explained with earnest intensity, willing him to understand. He didn't. How could he? Alice had been his partner for _decades_. He'd do anything for her.

"One vision has you doubting us?" Jasper asked incredulously. What could she have seen to rattle her so thoroughly?

"It was several," she said dryly, though somewhat detached. "Enough to know there's an option out there that would make your life better," she admitted, eyes vacant. Jasper had a feeling she was replaying the things she'd seen or seeing something new that only served to confirm what she was saying. Alice was concealing her emotions, so he had no idea how she felt about this possibility beyond what she said.

"I'm not going anywhere. I wouldn't do that to you. You saved me," Jasper vowed, repeating his belief in what she'd done for him, and unwilling to do something that would hurt Alice.

"I don't want you to stay with me out of loyalty or because you feel beholden to me," she said softly, giving him a fond, exasperated smile.

"It's not - I'm not - I love you," he said, projecting his emotions for her. He rarely said the words aloud, always preferring to let her feel the depth of his emotion instead. Her smile grew, but still she shook her head.

"I know. I do. But I also know I want what's best for you. I want you to have the best possible future," Alice explained, finally reaching out to take his hand after avoiding the contact earlier. She squeezed his fingers tightly.

"And you're convinced that it means I'm not with you?"

"Yes," she answered simply. "You've always trusted me before. Trust me now." Jasper nodded. She'd never mislead him. But this was new territory.

"And what about you? I could never be happy if you weren't. We've been together for decades," he said, concern filtering through him at the idea of her miserable.

"What are decades in the face of centuries - millennia even," she breathed, face animated.

"You've been my world. Why would that change?" Jasper asked, trying to understand.

"I've been your partner," she corrected. It was an important distinction. "And I know I'll be all right. Your path makes me happy," she promised.

"I… this is a lot to dump on me at once," he said.

"We can ease out of us," she offered timidly.

"Haven't you already been doing that?" he asked accusingly.

"I'm trying to make this an easy transition for everyone," she explained, not even trying to deny her actions.

"I still don't fully understand. Am I leaving?" he asked, scared of the possibility. What future could offer happiness without his family in it?

"No," she said quickly, firmly. Relief settled over him. "And it's still not set. So much is in flux. I can't know for certain, only guess," she babbled quickly. "I know we'll always be friends, family, just not lovers anymore. Aside from that? I just can't _see_."

"But it's certain enough that you felt comfortable telling me this much," he pointed out. She nodded and lapsed back into silence, the only sound in the room Bella's soft snoring.

Jasper felt numb as they sat there. Thoughts failed to form, just dangled unfinished like the broken clasp on a bracelet. An incomplete circle. He was totally disengaged from the bad melodrama playing out on tv. Except it was actually his life he was watching deteriorate and not a fictional show. But he didn't feel it. He couldn't. There was a faulty wire in his circuiting, and it meant the information his brain had just received was disconnected from his heart.

After a while, a couple hours actually, Alice said, "I'm going to find Seth. My head hurts too much in here."

Jasper didn't respond as he watched her prancing gait take her out into the woods. Away from him. Away from the life they'd built together.

Alice's departure fixed the bad wire, completing the circuit. His heart abruptly received the message, suddenly finding itself on the same page as his head.

A clamp seized his emotions, tightening impossibly, brutally locking down to keep everything he was feeling bottled up. He could not let anyone in the house feel his heartbreak. They'd already had to witness Bella's. He would not be the reason they felt his own. His pain would not be theirs.

"How are you holding up, man?" Emmett asked as he came bounding down the stairs. Sympathy overflowed his lake of emotions. Jasper shied away from the unwanted feeling. It had the potential to break his tightly wound control.

"You heard?" he asked, already knowing the answer. The whole house had to of heard. Great. Pity was even worse than sympathy.

"The whole family did. What, you can't feel their confusion?" Em asked, surprised as he plopped down in the nearby chair, legs thrown over the arm. Esme would have a fit if she saw him abusing her chair in such a way.

"I'm finding it difficult to separate mine from anyone else's just now," Jasper admitted. It was true. Alice's decision to end their relationship wounded him deeply, but that wasn't the predominant emotion if he was honest. No, that was reserved for his confusion.

"Yeah, I'll bet. No one saw this one coming," Em said, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Except Alice," Jasper quipped. It was a weak attempt at humor, but Emmett still chuckled. He was easy to amuse.

"Any idea what she was talking about?"

"Not a clue. But she's always tried to let things happen naturally. She usually only interferes when it's to save one of us in some way or if we ask her to." He'd always admired her restraint when it came to meddling. She'd done more in the last year since Bella came into the picture than she had since he'd met her, and most of her recent stuff had been at Edward's behest.

"I'm here if you need to talk," Emmett offered.

"Thanks, Em," Jasper said, grateful to have him in his life. Emmett was an outlet and a refuge that he'd never expected to find.

"What are brothers for?" Jasper smiled in response.

Bella shifted, turning her head to burrow it into Jasper's stomach. There was a pillow in his lap, and his arm was draped over her so that his hand rested against the baby. Over the thinnest layer of tissue and the protective sac separating the two. He could feel the excess heat from Bella's fever. With a flick of his wrist, the blanket slid off Bella to land lightly on the floor.

"Can't believe she's slept through all the excitement," Jasper murmured, running his hand across her forehead to judge her temperature. It was still a little too warm. He left his hand resting against her cheek.

"I know, right? We go decades without anything out of the ordinary happening - then _wham!_" Em said, punching his palm with his fist. "It's two years of nonstop action, every other day a new drama, and she goes and sleeps through the second… well, at least in the top five," he corrected, shrugging, "- biggest one."

"Good to know the dissolution of my marriage isn't as big of news as Edward dating a human, getting said human pregnant, or inspiring both the Volturi and a newborn army to take an interest in us."

"Priorities, bro," Emmett said, nodding. "Plus there's that," he added, nodding to the half finished cup of human blood Bella had left sitting on the coffee table when she'd fallen asleep a few hours ago.

"The whole house reeks of blood and wet dog," Jasper acknowledged.

The scent never really had time to dissipate with the frequency of Bella's need for more. He wasn't sure when he'd stopped holding his breath, but at some point he'd realized it was pointless and that it was bothering him less than usual. The wolf scent mixed in made it less appealing as well. He should probably consider thanking Seth and Jacob for that. Or not.

"I think we're all getting desensitized to it," Emmett said, huffing an incredulous laugh. "Who knew this was all it took to stop craving it so much?"

Jasper wasn't sure about that, but it seemed a reasonable explanation. Being around the blood wasn't easy, nor fun, but he managed. The first time was the hardest, but once it was over, he knew he could do it again. There was something to be said about practice. Plus, it helped that the blood wasn't fresh.

This last week was still a major breakthrough for Jasper as far as his control went. Alice's visions were faulty. For the first time ever, Jasper had to trust that he was strong enough and capable of resisting all on his own. Always he'd just relied on Alice to stop him before he slipped. Never had he truly pushed himself to resist when he was told he wouldn't be able to.

Perhaps it was all a self-fulling prophecy. In the past he'd been told he'd slip so he didn't bother trying not to.

It also hadn't helped that Edward had argued against him even trying to practice resisting. He thought Jasper was incapable of overcoming his past. The lack of faith hadn't helped any. Jasper had a feeling that had been a selfish move on Edward's part. He hadn't liked enduring Jasper's thoughts as he considered slipping. It made it harder for Edward to resist himself.

"At least one good thing came out of all this - so far," Jasper said when he saw Emmett was waiting for a response.

He didn't want to include the baby as a good thing yet when it might come at Bella's expense. The little one would still be welcomed and celebrated if the worst happened, but it would not be an unblemished joy in that case.

"Pretty soon we'll all be ready to join Carlisle in surgery," Emmett joked.

"Or at least not lose it over a surprise paper cut," Jasper said sadly.

"She's not the only one that doesn't blame you for what happened. None of us ever did," Emmett said reassuringly. Jasper raised a single eyebrow to express his thoughts on the statement. The meaning behind the gesture wasn't lost on Emmett. "Edward doesn't count. He lost his shit too, so I think that makes you two about even," Emmett said, shrugging easily like it was no big deal.

Jasper had always been closest to Emmett. He was the easiest for Jasper to be around because he was almost always ridiculously happy. Edward, on the other hand, always had a tortured, self-hating, depressed, and angsty thing going on. Dark emotions that brought Jasper down with him. Being near him was like drowning in a black pit of despair.

Then, when Edward was finally cheering up a bit - at least when he wasn't torturing himself over risking Bella's life or how his decision to leave hurt her - he'd requested Jasper keep his distance from the pair. That had been a slap in the face. Edward had made it clear that he at least blamed Jasper for James hurting Bella in Phoenix.

That had been the summer before he'd lost control and tried to kill her. Edward was paranoid that Jasper lacked the necessary restraint to be around Bella for any length of time. Jasper's actions on Bella's birthday had seemed to prove Edward right, so Jasper hadn't pushed to change things when the family moved back to town.

Even before Bella came into the picture, Edward had been aloof with everyone. He was too refined and dignified to wrestle with Jasper and Emmett or play video games with them. He only spent significant time with them when Carlisle insisted. Thanks to Jasper's gift, he had nearly the insight on Edward that Edward had on the others. Often, Edward looked down on Emmett and Jasper's antics as juvenile and immature. Edward's wealthy, only child background showed through in his solitary preference and superiority complex.

He loved Edward despite their issues. The two were family. All families were slightly dysfunctional, and this was just one of the many ways theirs was.

None of that mattered anymore. Edward was about to become a father and he wasn't here. A prospect none of the rest of them would ever get to experience, even if he - they - secretly longed to. Jasper wished that Alice had shared Edward's location while she'd been dumping him. Then at least he could have something else to focus on. Tracking Edward down, thoroughly thrashing the idiot, and dragging him back would have been a nice way to work through his feelings regarding Alice. He supposed he'd just have to make due with helping Bella the best he could.

"Thank you - for your forgiveness, and for checking on me," Jasper whispered. Emmett just smiled and glanced outside. Jasper assumed he was plotting their next wrestling match once Jasper was no longer tied to Bella so completely.

His family was complicated. That was a much kinder word than dysfunctional. Every family was, he reminded himself. And he loved each member.

* * *

"It's not a good idea to have blood in the house like this with most of us having not hunted in the last week, Carlisle," Jasper said when Rosalie took Bella to the bathroom for a bath.

Carlisle hoped the warm water would sooth her sore muscles, and Bella said she was feel grungy since it had been a couple days since she could have a proper shower once it became impossible for her to navigate the increasingly precarious stairs. Jasper was doing his best to project calming waves throughout the house since he doubted Bella would want him in the bathroom with her during this private human moment. Bad enough she had to rely on Rosalie's help. Bella's discomfort and mortification had been easy enough to detect before the pair had gone up.

"You think we should risk encountering Sam's pack?" Carlisle asked, brow wrinkled as he looked to Jasper for explanation on his comment.

Jasper was worried about slipping, doing something he'd regret. More than that, he was worried about Rosalie. She hadn't hunted since before Bella had returned. Neither had Esme for that matter. Their mother had been making excuses for the last day to stay in the kitchen or upstairs. He didn't want to see her suffer or isolate herself out of fear.

The prolonged time between hunts wasn't smart given the situation they were in. Jasper at least had hunted twice since Bella returned. Despite that, he could do with some fresh blood himself. He and Emmett might have joked that it was easier to be around human blood, and it was, but that didn't mean he wouldn't mind reducing the burn in his throat a bit if possible.

Too bad he couldn't leave Bella. He'd promised to stay and help with the baby. It wasn't a promise he had any intention of breaking. The others weren't likewise bound to stay.

Not hunting was also not a good idea if they needed to fight suddenly. If Sam's pack did attack, it would be sudden and unexpected. They'd go for the element of surprise. Jasper believed Carlisle when he'd told Jacob the other day that he wouldn't let Jacob, Seth, and Leah fight against those they considered family. It would go against his morals.

Jasper didn't possess the same qualms. He would always consider any and all advantages when it came to fighting. Whatever it took to keep his family safe and whole. And it would definitely be strategic to utilize the wolves. Sam's pack would hesitate when they found themselves facing off against their friends and family instead of enemy vampires. The momentary pause would be enough for the Cullens to make short work of the wolves, and win with minimal or potentially no dangers to any of his family.

"I think we should utilize Jacob's pack," Jasper explained. "Not to fight," he added quickly when he felt Carlisle's disapproval. Since Carlisle wouldn't allow Jacob and the others to fight, the Cullens should at least be in top form. That meant they needed to hunt.

Carlisle nodded slowly, appearing to consider what Jasper meant, then Jacob suspiciously asked, "What do you have in mind?"

Jasper hadn't noticed that the wolf was paying attention. He'd been dozing off on the couch, breaths on the verge of transitioning into cacophonous snores. Jasper's use of his name had probably startled him to wakeful alertness.

"You can scout the area, ensure it's clear then a group can go hunt," Jasper explained, speaking directly to the alpha. Jacob was a leader, and if Jasper treated him with the respect that position deserved, it might go a long way in gaining his help. "We'll keep them small - groups of two at a time. Three at the most."

"What of Bella's safety?" Carlisle questioned.

"I would be here. I'm not leaving her again. And the pack would stay here. I'm certain they're up to helping me should the need arise," Jasper said easily.

"You don't need to hunt yourself?" Carlisle asked, concern evident.

"I promised her I wouldn't leave again," Jasper reminded him. When it looked like Carlisle was about to protest, Jasper added, "She doesn't need anyone else breaking promises or abandoning her. I can handle it. I'm in control."

Carlisle nodded, trusting Jasper to know himself best. The respect Carlisle showed each member of his family was one of the primary reasons Jasper felt comfortable remaining with the Cullens when he and Alice first found them. He'd been hesitant, even down right against the idea at first. The thought of so many vampires living together brought to mind Maria and the newborns. He'd feared that he'd be returning to that hell of violence and death. Never had he believed it possible for so many of his kind to exist peacefully together. He still didn't think it would work without Carlisle at the center. He was goodness personified. It made all the difference.

"Alice, I would imagine you could determine the best routes - like you did before for Emmett and myself?" Jasper asked, knowing she was sitting on the other side of the couch, away from him but close to Jacob to help with her headache.

"The ones that disappear. Easy," she chimed, letting him know she'd been paying attention all along.

"Jacob, would you be willing?" Jasper asked, giving him the choice.

"It's not a bad plan. Guess I should get to scouting. Sooner I get back, the sooner I can sleep," Jacob agreed, wearily standing and trudging towards the exit.

"Hurry back, please. Or send Seth in," Alice requested. Her head must really be bothering her if she'd seek out the wet dog smell voluntarily.

Jasper continue his research while he waited. The newest books Esme had brought him seemed promising. Already one had confirmed the information he'd located in two other books, and it seemed this one might actually go into more detail. Vital detail that could help them prepare and save both Bella and the child.

Seth came in while Jasper was reading. He went right to Alice and sat beside her on the floor saying, "Jake said you wanted me."

The bashful longing Jasper felt had him turning his head to peer at Seth over the back of the couch. He was sitting next to Alice, much closer than necessary, and his cheekbones were stained with slashes of red as he looked at her.

How interesting…

The young wolf had a crush on Alice. He hadn't expected that. What's more, he was surprised by the fact that it didn't bother him. It was more amusing than anything. Maybe Alice had been more correct about them than he realized…

Seth was kind, sweet even. Jasper liked the overeager, enthusiastic young man more than he expected to. Jasper felt like he should warn Alice so she didn't inadvertently break the poor pup's heart.

"Thanks for coming. I can't make it stop when one of you guys aren't here," Alice said, sighing.

"Anytime. I really don't mind." Jasper chuckled silently. Understatement.

He listened to their conversation with half an ear as he read the text on the Kaqchikel indigenous people of Guatemala.

"I'm surprised you ever planned to change Bella here," Seth said.

"Actually, that wasn't the plan. During their honeymoon, Bella told Edward she wanted to do a year of college first. We were going to move east and change her there next summer," Alice explained sadly.

"But you came back here when this happened," Seth pointed out.

"Obviously, dog," Rosalie muttered as she brought Bella back into the room. Jasper noted that there was less heat in the insult than she usually added when she spoke to Jacob, and he didn't detect any animosity coming from her. Rose must actually like Seth, however reluctantly.

Bella smelled more strongly of freesias than she ordinarily did. It was ensnaring. Venom pooled uncomfortably in his mouth and he swallowed twice before Rosalie had her completely settled on the sofa beside him. Warmth seeped into him where she pressed against his side. Too much warmth. The bath must have been too hot because Bella's fever was back. Jasper slide up the sleeve of his shirt and wrapped his arm around Bella so more of his cool skin was in contact with her.

"Thanks," she whispered shyly, burrowing against him. Her fingers lazily stroked his skin, idly tracing the scars she could only dimly make out as the light shattered off the marks.

If he could jump out of his skin, he would. The sensation was so intense. Edward must not have ever told her how sensitive the scars remained even after they were healed. Most vampires instinctively feared the scars, and the pain and violence they represented.

Alice had never liked touching them either. But Jasper had so many that it was hard for her to touch him at all without coming in contact with at least one. Every time she did his body went into overdrive.

And now, having Bella willingly touch them was playing havoc with him. He'd frozen, not allowing his body to move a single millimeter - afraid to let anyone witness his reaction, and terrified she'd stop if she knew how electrifying he found her touch to be.

Bella glanced at Jasper and smiled softly. He could feel how relaxed the bath had left her. Bella's eyelids were half closed, as though weights were trying to drag them closed entirely.

Seth was still chuckling at Rosalie's comment, not offended in the least. "I guess I'm just curious. Didn't any of you think the pack might have a problem with this? Jake's not always the most level headed where Bella's concerned. Neither are some of the others about your family," Seth said lightly, as if he found their antics the height of ridiculous.

"This was the best option in a very difficult situation," Carlisle said, shaking his head and sighing.

Jasper sighed himself as Bella's fingers stopped moving. She'd drifted back to sleep, her head resting lightly on his shoulder. The position left her neck exposed. So vulnerable, so trusting. Her pulse pushed against the thin skin, briefly inflating it in time with the ticking of the mantle clock. More venom oozed into his mouth. It was less difficult than it should be to remain immobile and swallow it.

How could she let her guard down around him enough to sleep in such a position? Her unmitigated belief in him was too much to process. He didn't even know where to begin. All he knew was that he couldn't deny the fact it changed him. Changed him in that rare way vampire natures so rarely experienced. He didn't precisely understand what the change meant, but he felt that it had taken place.

"What about Tanya and her family? They're family, right? Why didn't you take Bella there when you found out Sam wanted to attack?" Seth asked.

"Bella's condition takes constant monitoring and significant medical equipment. My history here means I have beneficial connections and access to things she needs that I wouldn't have elsewhere," Carlisle explained.

"Plus it wouldn't be easy to move her like this. She's so… " Alice added, trailing off uncomfortably.

"Delicate. Isn't that the right term for pregnant women?" Seth finished for her.

"Works as well as any," Carlisle agreed.

"And afterwards… What are your plans then?" Seth asked. Jasper picked up on his worry.

"We'll go. As soon as the baby and Bella are up for it," Carlisle promised. Jasper thought he was trying to be reassuring, but Jasper felt the sadness these words caused Seth. The wolf didn't want the family leaving. How strange. The other wolves likely would have rejoiced at the news.

"Oh." That single word was all Seth seemed capable of articulating.

"What's wrong?" Jasper asked after detecting the more complex emotions of doubt, grief, and anxiety.

"I'll miss you guys. Can I visit?"

"You will always be welcome in our home, Seth," Carlisle assured him, touched that he'd want to remain in contact with the Cullens. Jasper sensed that this request meant more to Carlisle than he could ever truly express.

"Thanks," Seth said, happiness returning, though there were still undertones of concern.

"Is something else bothering you?" Jasper prodded.

"I guess. Well… What are you going to do about Edward?"

"Serves him right if we do leave him," Rose huffed angrily, but with a hint of satisfaction.

"Rosalie," Carlisle warned. "If it comes time to go, and he hasn't returned to us yet, yes, we'll go without him. We'll leave word with Tanya's family so he can find us though. I'm hoping it won't come to that. I believe Edward was just overwhelmed and needed a little time to come to terms with all that has happened. Hopefully he will return to us soon."

Jasper ignored the rest of the conversation Carlisle, Alice, and Seth had regarding Edward's motives and actions. This wasn't the first time Edward had taken off over the years. In fact, it was a fairly regular occurrence. Jasper didn't blame him. It was just part of his personality. Hearing thoughts probably didn't help much. His brother needed space and isolation to clear his head since it was the only time he ever had any peace to think for himself without others' opinions influencing him. Jasper just wished Edward had been mature enough to handle this situation better. Edward's actions weren't fair to Bella or his child.

The next passage of the book in his lap captured his attention, casting all thoughts of Edward far from his mind.

"Carlisle, I've found something," Jasper said, rereading the page to ensure he'd understood correctly. This was the first reference he'd found of a mythical accelerated pregnancy that explained in full detail. "About the birth."

Esme and Emmett joined the family in the sitting room before he'd finished speaking. He was relieved that Seth was on Bella duty instead of Jacob. This news wasn't going to go over well.

"What have you found out?" Carlisle asked eagerly. He'd been hoping for any information possible to better help him look after Bella.

Jasper debated for a moment, then said, "Bella should hear this too." It was her body, and her future. She'd deserved the right to hear this firsthand along with everyone else. "Darlin', time to wake up."

"Is something wrong? Are the wolves -" Bella slurred, sleep lingering in her voice and disorienting her.

"All quiet," Seth reassured her, reaching over the back of the couch to pat her head.

"I think I found some things on how the birth will happen," Jasper explained, meeting Bella's timid eyes. She was scared, but she didn't want the others to know.

"Will the baby be all right?" Bella asked, letting Jasper know the source of her fear. It was all for the baby. She reserved none for herself, though he now knew she should.

"The baby will be fine," he vowed. Rosalie released a relieved breath, and Jasper felt her concern evaporate entirely. Jasper resisted the urge to glare at her. He'd already been over this with Rose.

Bella took a deep breath, not looking away from Jasper. He felt her grief and comprehension the moment she understood that he'd very specifically only assured her that the baby would survive. He sent her what strength and fortification of will he could, bracing her to stay strong in front of the family. He knew she'd hate letting them see any sign of sadness or fear.

"And Bella?" Alice asked. Jasper didn't immediately respond, lost in his interaction with Bella, the flow of emotions passing back and forth between them speaking more than words.

"What did you find Jasper?" Emmett demanded impatiently.

"The sac around the baby. Only a couple things will be able to penetrate it," Jasper explained, pausing before he continued paraphrasing what he'd read. "The baby will try to chew it's way out of the womb."

"There has to be a safe way to save both of them. To remove the baby before it has to do that," Esme beseeched, moving to Carlisle as sobs shook her shoulders. Jasper felt her frustration as she was denied the cathartic release that true tears provided.

"Bella will be fine. Venom will heal her," Rose said, the words pretending a level of confidence she didn't actually feel.

"Not if it rips her up in the process," Alice said sharply. Jasper couldn't tell if Alice was more angry or scared. She was blocking him as best she could.

The emotional climate was uncomfortably oppressive. Jasper felt like he was wading through cement as he attempted to navigate the onslaught of feelings layering the room. He hated the thick negativity. The dark emotions sliced at him, a thousand shallow cuts slowly bleeding him to death with no way out and no possibility of hope.

He wished everyone had a little more control. How was he supposed to help Bella when their despair left him too depressed to artificially produce the emotions she needed just now?

"Vampire venom can only do so much," Carlisle said carefully, speaking directly to Bella. Jasper knew where this turn was headed. Carlisle was once again going to suggest terminating the pregnancy. Jasper fully believed the decision was up to Bella, but it would destroy him if that was the choice - not that he believed she'd ever even consider doing it - but he loved the child too much to lose it now. "Bella… "

"Save my baby. If it is a choice, I chose my child," Bella said firmly. Carlisle's shoulders slumped, but he nodded in acquiescence. He didn't want to lose his child anymore than Bella wanted to lose hers. If Bella died, Carlisle would lose not only her, but Edward too. It was a difficult position to be in.

"What if we deliver the baby early - control the circumstances. Does that increase both of their chances?" Jasper asked, thinking back to what Esme had said earlier that no one had acknowledged. It was at least a possibility that needed to be considered and discussed.

Bella's hand grasped his. She was afraid. He sent calming waves, beseeching her to trust him. She didn't speak up, so he took that as his cue to continue this line of questioning.

"How do you suggest we do that?" Alice asked. "Didn't you say the protective membrane is too hard? It's not like Carlisle can do a typical sescerian." Logistically, Carlisle had never tried to deliver a baby under these circumstances.

Jacob entered the room, and Jasper only barely suppressed a groan at the poor timing. This conversation was emotional enough without the mutt saying something offensive that would hurt Bella's feelings.

"What's going on now? Did it break another rib?" Jacob demanded, but everyone except Bella ignored him. She shook her head as Jasper explained his theory.

"Our teeth could penetrate the sac from the outside. You could do it soon, Carlisle. Today or tomorrow maybe. Whenever - depends on how far along you think she is. But we can do it before the baby is forced to try to get out the other way because it can no longer fit. Once the baby is out, Carlisle, you can keep Bella alive while the venom spreads."

"You're talking about her having that thing _now_?" Jacob asked. Again, everyone ignored him.

"The baby isn't ready. That's too risky," Rosalie insisted, moving to Bella's side. Jasper had felt her spike of panic the moment he'd said the word today, but he'd continued regardless. He wanted - _needed_ \- both to survive this.

"Carlisle, it can respond to different emotions. He's developed enough that it'd be better for both to induce labor early," Jasper said, trying to convince everyone. Something told him the baby would be fine if it was born soon. Just a little early. This was the best solution for both mother and child.

"You can't be sure -" Rose began.

Jasper cut her off. "Bella's body can't accommodate the baby for much longer. It's getting too uncomfortable. Pretty soon he'll move without meaning to and end up accidentally killing Bella," Jasper said bluntly.

"Carlisle, what do you think? How premature will the baby be?" Esme asked.

"My estimation puts her at full term in five and a half days, maybe only five if it continues to accelerate," Carlisle said slowly, considering Bella and drawing on his experience as he made his medical diagnosis. "At first the baby was growing slower. Bella was gaining less than a centimeter a day. Each centimeter represents about a week of pregnancy. But now it's at least two centimeters a day. She's approximately twenty-seven or twenty-eight weeks now."

"Wait until the day after tomorrow then. Remove the baby and change Bella that night - the day after at the latest," Jasper said, squeezing Bell'a hand. "That'll put the baby at around thirty-three weeks, possibly more. At the rate it's growing and developing you know it'll survive. Bella might not if you wait too much longer," Jasper said persuasively, urging everyone to agree with him.

"The bloodsucker has my vote," Jacob said, understanding the situation. Jasper was grateful for the unexpected support. Maybe he should have wanted Jacob here all along. Bella sometimes listened to her friend.

"No one asked you, mongrel," Rosalie hissed. Emmett put a restraining hand on her shoulder. He wanted them both to live too. This was the best plan.

"Bella, what do you want to do?" Jasper asked, knowing that regardless of the other's support, it was her decision, and hers alone.

"Carlisle, can you guarantee my baby will survive? That doing it early won't hurt the baby?" Bella asked cautiously.

"I've never lost a preemie younger than twenty-nine weeks. There is already significant evidence to suggest your child is stronger than fully human babies at this stage. There are no guarantees, but also no cause to worry if we initiated things in a couple days. It will increase the likelihood that venom will be able to repair the damage to your body," Carlisle replied.

"Rose, what do you think?" Bella asked, and Jasper bit his tongue to keep from hissing at his sister. He didn't want Rosalie having the deciding vote. He'd make her regret it if she didn't prove her words from the other day about wanting Bella to live.

To his surprise Rose was silent for several minutes.

"Carlisle's right. That's far enough along that the baby will be fine with all of our help and resources if we do it the day after tomorrow, and it probably is your best bet," Rose finally said. Jasper sent her waves of affection and love. Rose just rolled her eyes at him, likely knowing the dark turn his thoughts had taken just a few moments ago. Bella, having felt his emotions passing and watched Rose's response, grinned at him before turning her attention back to Rosalie.

"You'll look after him while I'm… " Bella requested. Jasper again felt Rose's reaction to the heartfelt plea - smug satisfaction and vindication. She'd get to play mom, however temporarily, and she was the one Bella trusted to watch the baby.

"Of course, Bella," Rose said lightly. A smile curved her lips, revealing the smallest fraction of her feelings.

"You'll help her? Keep him safe for me?" Bella asked. It took Jasper a moment to realize she was speaking to him. Surprise caught him unaware. Jasper met Bella's eyes. There was such determination and trust in them that Jasper found it difficult to speak. How was this one tiny human capable of getting under his skin so completely?

"Always," Jasper whispered, swallowing thickly and reinforcing the walls that kept his emotions locked within him. The dam had cracked a bit with her request and the tiny leak seemed to find its way straight to Bella. He watched the joyous smile break across her face, lighting it like the most brilliant sunrise when she felt a millimeter's worth of the depth of his emotions, and how honored he was by her faith and trust in him.

"It's a plan then," she said several moments later. "I'll have the baby in two days."

"On that note… it's clear if you want to send a hunting group," Jacob interrupted. Suspicion and disbelief oozed from him, sticking to every surface in the room. Jacob was less than thrilled by the new dynamic between Jasper and Bella.

"Alice, Esme, Rose -"

"I'm not going," Rosalie said at once. "Bella might need me."

Jasper wanted to argue, but Emmett stepped in before he could. "I've got it covered. I take it you're not going either?" he asked, watching Jasper shake his head. "I'll go with the girls then."

"All right. Be safe," Carlisle agreed.

* * *

Jasper was less than impressed by Emmett's solution to Jasper and Rosalie refusing to leave to go hunt. He'd brought back two dead deer slung around his neck - one for each of them. Jasper considered refusing, but knew it wouldn't be wise. Suffering through the indignity of quickly drinking a dead deer behind the house was worth it to keep his promise to Bella and maintain control. The dead animal blood nearly had him gagging as if he were ridding himself of human food. But he had to admit it did help quench the dryness in his throat the tiniest fraction. Emmett had lost his mind though if he actually believed he could talk Rosalie into doing it too.

Jasper spent the rest of the afternoon strategizing the best use of the surrounding forest should Sam's pack attack once the baby was born. He bounced ideas off Jacob and Emmett while Rosalie, Esme, and Alice entertained Bella. Carlisle was busy upstairs preparing for the birth and changing Bella.

"Are you going to fight us over changing her?" Jasper asked without preamble. Jacob's eyes rounded at the question.

"You really think she'll make it through the birth to be changed?" Jacob whispered, discreetly glancing over at Bella.

"Yes. I've never met a more determined human," Jasper said firmly. He had to believe she'd survive this or he'd be upstairs trying to convince Carlisle that there was no need to wait. Today was just as good as tomorrow.

"You should talk to Sam then - before it happens," Jacob said, sadness dripping steadily from him like rain.

"You're technically chief, Jacob. It's actually your permission that we need," Jasper pointed out.

"I-I'm not," Jake said, shaking his head frantically. Jasper didn't understand why he fought so hard against his birthright. Hadn't he already embraced being alpha of a pack?

"You are," Jasper insisted. Resignation contorted the young chief's features. It was a burden, this responsibility, but it was one Jasper believed Jacob would grow into bearing. He may be an immature teenager just now, but Jasper had caught a few hints of the man he would one day become.

"Fine. Sure, sure. Change her," Jacob agreed moodily, surrendering to the pressure of his position.

"It won't be in violation of the treaty?" Jasper pressed, wanting the words said aloud in a binding oath that all in the house could bear witness to.

"No!" Jacob exclaimed, throwing his hands up in defeat. "Geez, just don't let her die," he said, resigning himself to Bella's inevitable fate.

"We'll do our best," Jasper vowed.

Alice flittered upstairs the moment the deal was struck. Jasper, like everyone supernatural in the room, listened as she spoke to Carlisle. Their eavesdropping both unavoidable and somewhat intentional.

"Bella has this notion," Alice began. Jasper could hear fond exasperation in her tone. He could picture Alice shaking her head over Bella's overly romantic ideas. "She wants Edward to be the one to change her because she believes that if it's his venom that does it, it's proof that he loved her enough to want to keep her forever," she explained.

"Well, Alice, unless you've been holding out on us and you know where he is, that can't happen," Carlisle said wearily.

"No. I don't know where he is. But I had an idea," Alice said, bubbling excitement making her voice tinkle like bells.

"An idea?" Carlisle said hesitantly.

"What if we all changed her? If each of our venom was in her… well, it wouldn't exactly make up for Edward, but then she'd know we all want her," Alice said in a rush, talking fast even for her.

"Alice," Jasper breathed, barely audible, but knowing she'd hear anyways. There was no way he'd be able to bite Bella and not lose control. Emmett looked ready to bound upstairs and protest too.

"No, Jazz, I know you can't actually bite her. Though I don't think you'd lose control, it's still better not to risk it since I can't _see_ the outcome," Alice explained. Confusion surrounded him from his nearby family members, mimicking his own.

"I don't understand, Alice," Carlisle said, voicing the thought on everyone's mind.

"Syringes. What if we each put our venom in syringes to inject her with? We could get it to her heart quicker that way too," Alice said. Jasper glanced at Bella, helpless to stop himself. Jacob was pressed against her as she ate the fried chicken and eggs Esme had fixed her a few minutes ago. Jacob's eyes were locked on her chest where they could all hear the sluggish beating. There was no denying Alice's words. "Surely, you've all noticed how irregular it sounds. It might not hold on long enough with all the other traumas she'll be enduring if we don't do something like this," Alice said, elaborating on her idea.

"I've never heard… But then this is such a unique situation… Perhaps… " Carlisle muttered, frustrating everyone when he failed to vocalize his complete thoughts.

"Well?" Alice prompted, likely annoyed she'd couldn't see him ultimately agreeing.

"Yes, yes, I think that could work. We could… " Carlisle said, once more breaking off mid sentence. Jasper could hear his father moving around upstairs, opening and closing drawers. "Ah, yes. This should work."

"I'll go first," Alice volunteered.

"What gave you the idea to do this?" Carlisle asked.

There was a pause before Alice responded. Jasper assumed it was because she was extracting her venom. "I've been toying with the idea since Edward went to Italy. Bella asked me to change her if he refused or tried to back out later - which he was planning to do, by the way - but I'm just not sure I could do it. This was the only thing I came up with to keep my promise while maintaining control."

It was a good idea. If each of them gave Bella venom… that would be a significant amount coursing through her system. He, like Carlisle, had never heard of someone even getting bit more than once or twice. It was just too difficult not to lose control in the process.

The idea of having a role in changing Bella filled him with an indescribable emotion. For someone so good at detecting and dissecting others' emotions, sometimes it threw him how truly awful he was at understanding his own. All he knew was that it had a significance that he'd need to examine at length to fully comprehend. It was right in line with what he'd been feeling for her earlier.

He wondered how Bella would react to knowing each of them was willing to give her their venom, even Rosalie. Jasper was tempted to tell her what everyone was doing as each family member went upstairs, one by one, but this had been Alice's idea, so she should be the one to tell her.

At last it was his turn.

"I'll be right back, Bella. I need to see Carlisle for a moment," he explained as he carefully extracted his arm from behind her and hurried upstairs.

He wanted to do this quickly so he could return to her. The baby was restless and extremely uncomfortable tonight. Little guy wasn't so little anymore. Bella's beach ball midsection was proof enough of that fact.

"Thank you for negotiating with Jacob," Carlisle said when he handed Jasper a fresh syringe.

"It needed to be done. One less threat to worry about," Jasper said, sliding the needle into his mouth and against where his gums and teeth met. The needle wouldn't puncture his skin, but an abundance of venom seeped out, seeming to know it was needed. He slowly pulled the plunger, sucking the fiery, life-altering fluid into the shiny metal tube.

"You've done well preparing for all possibilities. We couldn't have done this without you," Carlisle continued, resting a comforting hand on Jasper's shoulder. Jasper was at least an inch taller than Carlisle, and not all that much younger, but just then he felt like his true son.

"You could," Jasper said, extracting the needle from his mouth, and shrugging the praise off. It made him uncomfortably flustered. He didn't know how to process it. "But I'm glad to help. I'll always protect this family," he added so Carlisle wouldn't doubt his devotion.

"Thank you, son," Carlisle said quietly. Jasper felt the hopeful hesitance that the endearment would not be taken amiss. Never had Carlisle addressed him as son. That term had always been reserved for Edward. Not that Carlisle didn't feel that way about Jasper. He'd always felt the emotion from his father, but he'd never said it outright before to him or even Emmett. Though Emmett was more of a momma's boy, and Esme called him son frequently - usually followed by some sort of reprimand.

Jasper opened his mouth to thank Carlisle, but Bella's loud, piercing scream broke the moment, shattering it irrevocably as a tsunami of agony slammed Jasper in the wake of the fading echoes that reverberated throughout the house.


	7. 7: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Parts of Bella's change and the baby's birth will be spread over four chapters since each person will have a different perspective and witnesses different parts of it (so there will be very little actual overlap), and it will cross over into part 2 of this story. The chapters will contain other significant events also, so please don't get annoyed when it's not all neatly wrapped up in one go.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 7 - Alice

"You need to get that thing out of her. Now," Jacob insisted, jabbing a finger at Bella's huddled form.

"No! It's too - soon," Bella hissed through gritted teeth, each word a grunted exhalation. "I need - to wait - another - two days."

For the first time in days Bella wasn't able to mask her pain. And Alice could see the effort Bella was putting into down playing it. It was a wasted effort. Whatever had happened inside her was significant. Her rapid heart rate and breathing made it impossible to ignore.

"Seriously? It's insanity to wait," Jacob said, looking from one person to the next in obvious frustration.

"It's Bella's decision," Carlisle murmured sadly as he sped down the stairs and knelt beside her. Carlisle had resigned himself to adhering to Bella's wishes rather than administering doctorly advice and treating her like any other patient at the hospital. It was precisely why doctors weren't allowed to treat family.

"The baby is worried. It was an accident," Jasper murmured, looking torn as he moved behind the sofa to stand near Bella. His hand hovered over her shoulder a moment then retracted. He was scared to touch her. Afraid even the lightest touch might inflict additional pain. "There just wasn't room when he shifted. He feels so guilty causing you pain."

"Hush, baby. I know. You're okay," Bella cooed, voice catching in pain even as she soothed the cause of her latest misery. "It's only another forty-eight hours - less than actually. I can make it," Bella gasped, pleading eyes locked on Carlisle. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it and went about checking her over.

Carlisle didn't bother moving Bella upstairs, just carefully lifted her shirt to the top of her belly, and began examining her on the sofa while everyone hovered around uselessly. He paused his exam only long enough for Bella to vomit blood into the bucket Rosalie held for her. Even Rose looked shaken. There was no way she could say this happened with human babies too.

Spasms racked Bella's withered frame, her muscles no longer obeying her as they contracted and relaxed randomly. Bella's lower back was one large stain of blackish-blue. The bruising was more extensive than any Alice had witnessed on her thus far. She was bleeding internally. The rest of her skin had taken on a clammy, bluish tint in the last few minutes.

Alice watched in silence along with her family. Since ending things officially with Jasper, she'd been much more on board about the pregnancy and the shifting dynamics. Esme and Rosalie had both tried to talk to her about what was going on. It was clear they'd already begun to suspect what was to come. But she'd refused to spill or confirm anything.

Bella and Jasper needed things to progress naturally without others' interference. Maybe just a _little_ prodding from her. She wanted to see them together and happy. Waiting was hard. This… _stasis_ period was annoying. Not to mention frustrating. The two people she loved so much deserved to experience what she'd seen in store for them.

Her conversation with Seth had helped too. A magical baby. A way to tie the family together and give them something precious to bond over. It really was a miracle. The baby was a breath of fresh air, breathing new life into her family. And until tonight, she'd really started to believe there was nothing to worry about anymore, despite the future's uncertainty.

Then this happened, and Bella was at risk of dying once more.

"She has lacerations to both her liver and her right kidney," Carlisle finally declared as he settled Bella gently back against the cushions. "It's possible that her intestines were damaged as well, though that does not appear to be the case. Bella, I'll need to monitor you closely to be certain since the baby is preventing me from doing some of the necessary tests."

"But those injuries are treatable," Jacob said, an edge of pleading in his statement. "Tell me you can treat her, doc."

"Ordinarily, yes. Given time and rest they can heal on their own if the damage isn't too severe. When it is, an operation is required. However, in Bella's case… "

"So I was right," Edward whispered. "It _is_ killing her."

Alice, along with everyone else present turned to see the missing Cullen standing stone still at the edge of the room. Everyone had been so focused on Bella that Edward had entered the room unnoticed.

Alice took in her missing brother. Tortured. Agonized. Possibly deranged. That was the only way to describe him.

The dark circles beneath his black eyes made it clear he hadn't hunted since his honeymoon, and he was still wearing the rumpled clothes he'd gotten off the plane in. He was an utter mess.

"Edward," Bella breathed, her rapid heart racing alarmingly faster at the sight of him, "you came back." There was such hope on her face even as her hands moved to cover her belly.

Was she trying to keep Edward from seeing the evidence of his choices? Maybe spare him the shame that knowing he'd left her alone in this ordeal would surely cause? Alice wasn't sure what Bella was thinking. Her reactions were always so difficult to predict.

Edward's, on the other hand, weren't. His eyes had zeroed in on Bella's bulging stomach, far too large for only being a month or so along.

Alice closed her eyes against what she knew was coming, unable to bear witnessing it for herself. She hadn't seen it - Bella's condition prevented that, but still she knew how this encounter would go. Edward was not in a reasonable state at the moment.

"I've wanted to since the moment I left." Detached. Unfeeling. Edward's voice was cold and dead. An animated corpse.

_Don't do this, Edward! _Alice thought furiously at her brother, begging him to be rational and work through this with them.

Edward ignored her, not even glancing at her from the corner of his eye with their usual silent communication that only the two of them shared.

He was so scared. Scared of facing eternity in a world that Bella wasn't in. He was letting it rule him. That fear controlled him. He was letting it make him act like an ass.

"You're here now," Bella said like she was trying to convince herself that it was the only thing that mattered. The brittle edge to her words gave voice to the lie.

She was at least willing to forgive him, as she always did. If he said the right thing they'd eventually get past this. Her murky memories would help once she transitioned. Bella would forget the hurt she felt if she chose to. The way Alice had blocked out the horror of being locked in an asylum.

Edward didn't respond. Alice knew what he was doing. Listening to everyone's thoughts. Taking in all that he'd missed. Finding justifications to his fears. She was certain his focus would be on the damage the baby had done to Bella, not how Bella loved the child, and how she'd been doing so much better before this happened.

Before he spoke, Alice knew that Bella wouldn't be hearing the apology she craved. The one her soul longed for. Even without her sight she knew her brother well enough to predict the outcome. This whole night was turning into the aftermath of a tornado. A swift and violent storm that only left behind an unrecognizable path of chaotic destruction.

"Why haven't you done something? Are you really just going to let her die, Carlisle?" Edward demanded.

"This only just happened," Carlisle began placatingly.

"I'm fine, Edward."

"You have to get it out of her now," Edward said, glaring at Carlisle and ignoring Bella. "It's like me - nothing but a murderous monster!"

"Don't. You know nothing. You aren't seeing clearly," Bella denied, shaking her head. Her eyes strayed to Carlisle, and she repeated, "It's still too soon. I just have to hang on another couple days."

"Its ripping up your organs! No one can survive that," Edward screamed, sounding crazed. "Venom won't work if your heart stops first or if there's nothing left of your insides to change!"

"It's not his fault! You have to accept this. I won't sacrifice my child for myself," Bella said stubbornly. Her chalky complexion misting with sweat. The added strain from fighting was taking a visible toll.

"If you want a child, Bella, that's fine. You love Jacob. You can have as many kids with him as you want. I won't mind at all. You can even stay human to do it," Edward said, nodding as he spoke. Like he'd just made the most reasonable suggestion ever. Several people gasped, Alice included. She hadn't seen that one coming.

'_Edward, how could you even suggest… ' _Alice thought to her brother, but he ignored her. Again. Ugh! '_Edward! Don't do this!_'

"I don't want _his_ kids," Bella spat and Jacob retreated a step, limbs visibly shaking and fists clenched.

Alice wished he hadn't been here to witness her abhorrence to the idea of reproducing with him. Poor kid. She felt bad for him - even if he was all wrong for Bella and driving them all crazy with his hopeless pursuit.

"I want _my_ child. _This_ child," she yelled, rubbing a protective hand over her belly. "And I don't want to stay human - that's what _you_ want. What you've always wanted," Bella accused. Her disgust at the idea at least seemed to be distracting her from the pain she was still no doubt in. "This is just another time you're trying to force me to give in to your wishes."

"I want you to _survive_. This thing is killing you! Don't you see that? Don't you understand? I can't survive without you!"

"I know it might kill me," Bella whispered, tears streaming down her face as she looked down at her hands cradling her enormous bump. It was the first time Alice had heard her acknowledge that she might not make it through this. The words terrified her. She couldn't give up hope. Bella had to survive. She had to! "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. He'll need you though - if I die. But you're strong. You'll be all right. And you'll always have a piece of me," Bella said softly, offering Edward his consolation prize as her hands continued drifting lightly over where the baby rested nestled inside her.

Edward huffed, staggering back several steps. Alice winced. Edward was not going to react well to that. Her imagination conjured a vision of what would happen. Not with her gift, but from years of experience. It played out a quarter of a second before the real thing, making Alice feel like she had double vision while listening to an echo as her spot on prediction took place.

"If that - _thing - _kills you," Edward began, low and menacing. He looked every inch the vicious vampire of legends. "I swear I will kill it."

Everyone in the room looked to Bella, but Alice's eyes remained fixed on Edward. He looked like a fish, opening and closing his mouth uselessly, like he was attempting to inhale the words out of existence. But it was too late. The gauntlet had already been thrown.

"No!" Bella screamed. Jasper was beside her at once. Wrapping an arm around her and filling the room in suffocating clouds of tranquility. It barely took the edge off. "No, Edward. How can you -"

"Shh, we won't let him," Jasper murmured soothingly, pulling her closer.

Bella buried her face in Jasper's neck, sobbing despite his mood manipulation. Alice watched as Bella fisted Jazz's shirt, trying to get closer, to hide inside the one offering unconditional protection. He'd become Bella's safe place, her refuge.

So quickly he'd become her haven. As if he'd been fashioned for the role all along.

"Leave, Edward. Go to Denali. I'll contact you there," Carlisle said, moving to block Edward when he tried to approach the couple on the couch. "You're making this unnecessarily harder for her."

It was glaringly obvious that Edward regretted his rash words. His face had taken on the grimace of one being burned alive. But it was too late. His pyre had already been set ablaze with scorching flames. The final nail had just been driven home, sealing the coffin closed. Alice knew it. With that one declaration, the future was determined. Somehow this had just ensured that Bella's future was with Jasper, not Edward.

The die was cast.

There was nothing to do now except embrace it fully. Alice had been right to prepare things earlier when she first learned of the possibility.

"Carlisle," Edward begged, eyes still trained on Bella.

"No. I've never been so ashamed of you before, Edward. You're behaving like a spoiled child. I know you didn't mean it, we all do. But you can't say things like that. You just can't. Not without repercussions. Go now," Carlisle declared, turning his back on Edward, dismissing him. "We'll speak about what has transpired here soon."

Edward fled. Jacob followed close behind, aggression boiling over as he ran after Edward. Fear of what might happen forced Alice to chase after the two equally immature fools that believed themselves in love with her sister.

Jacob was shoving Edward when she caught up to them. He'd caught Edward less than six miles from the house. Edward was fast. Far faster than Jacob, especially when the werewolf hadn't phased. Alice worried that Edward had let Jacob catch him. That he wanted this fight. That he welcomed the death sentence Jacob seemed ready and willing to dish out.

"Edward! Jacob! Stop this!" she cried, inserting herself between them. Jacob jerked back, unwilling to go through her to get to Edward. Her brother continued to stand there. He hadn't even been trying to defend himself.

"Where do you get off? First you take off, then you come back and start issuing threats -" Jake yelled, continuing his assault verbally. Anger was making him shake violently. His skin was practically rippling.

"You don't like the idea of this child any more than I do!"

"That's not the point," Jacob replied. A growl from nearby told Alice that Leah was here too. Thankfully she seemed content to watch. Her presence… well, more her mouth, would likely only make things worse.

"Jacob," Edward said warningly.

"No! You won. She picked you. Yet you still hurt her," Jacob continued, furious.

"I didn't know this would happen!" Edward yelled, dropping to his knees, his head falling forward. "You're right," he whispered, responding to some thought Jake must have had. Probably how all this was Edward's fault. He was always ready to take the blame onto himself, deserved or not. Though this time it was most assuredly deserved.

"Yeah? And what's your excuse for leaving? Huh?" Jacob demanded, his shaking more under control now.

"I couldn't face -"

"Coward," Jacob hissed, trying to provoke Edward.

"Jacob -" Alice chirped, reprimanding him. She did not want them coming to blows.

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Edward denied, shoulders heaving as his body tried and failed to produce the tears he longed to shed. "I couldn't watch, knowing that I… "

"You're right. You are at fault. You should have forced the issue or at least stuck around to help her through this," Jake said.

"I offered her an alternative," Edward said, looking up at Jacob like it was his fault Bella hadn't taken him up on the offer.

"No. You threatened to kill her child then pimp her out to me like a common whore," Jacob said in disgust. Edward growled at the crude depiction of what had just happened.

Leah inched closer, grey hackles raised threateningly, a long, low growl escaping her sharp, clenched teeth. A string of drool dangled from her curled canine lips.

"Like you mind," Edward replied sourly.

Alice knew how jealous Edward still was over Bella and Jacob's closeness, and that Bella had willingly kissed Jake. He'd refused to acknowledge the hurt, choosing to let it fester instead. Those unspoken miscommunications were part of the problem now. Edward and Bella didn't have the open dialogue necessary to sustain a healthy, functional relationship. They were each so worried about keeping the other at the expense of their own feelings and insecurities that things ended up worse off instead of better.

"Actually I do. I know it's not what she wants. It's sick - _twisted_ \- and she knows it," Jacob said angrily, and Leah growled again.

"I just want what's best for her," Edward whispered, defeated.

"Why do you always have to think you know what's best for her? Why can't you trust her to know her own mind?" Alice asked, not understanding his motivation. "Why, Edward?"

"I've lived so much longer. I don't want her to make a mistake. I want her to be happy."

Edward's desire for Bella to be happy had her vision of Bella's first hunt flashing through her mind.

_Jasper's eyes widened as Bella ran her fingers over his chest, wonder on her face. Then, in an instant, their arms were locked around one another and their lips were sealed in a battle for dominance. It was a wild, animalistic kiss. Passion driving the dueling tongues and grasping hands._

Alice reigned in her thoughts as quickly as possible, not wanting Edward to see, then began translating last year's history textbook into Gaelic.

"Doesn't seem that way -" Jake started, but Edward cut him off.

"What was that?" Edward demanded, suddenly on his feet again. "Alice," he said, gripping her arms tightly as he stared at her, horrified. Her skin groaned and creaked beneath his hands. The sound of boulders shifting before an avalanche. She winced, ready to snap at him, but he immediately eased up and begged, "Tell me, please."

Alice hesitated for a fraction of a second, running through the pros and cons. Then she closed her eyes and replayed the very first vision she'd had of Jasper and Bella, letting Edward see it in full.

_Bella, eyes nearly the same golden as the rest of the Cullens' but with just a hint of yam orange lingering, was sitting gracefully on the porch steps. She was so still she could have been a statue carved from the most pristine marble and sheathed in denim and cotton. _

"She's -" Edward said, inhaling sharply.

_Emmett and Rosalie were curled together on a porch swing, likely recently installed since there wasn't one outside just yet. Nearby, Esme was gardening. She appeared to be planting blue and purple irises, taking advantage of the rare sunny day. Alice was perched just above her on the railing, one leg dangling over and swinging gently. Esme reached to nudge her aside when it appeared Alice was distracted, likely lost in visions of the future, a wistful smile on her otherwise blank face. _

_Then Jasper came bounding up the drive, moving with the speed and grace of a cheetah. He looked incandescently happy, happier than Alice had ever seen him. When he reached the assembled group he scooped Bella up, spinning around with her draped over his shoulder as he laughed freely. _

_After setting Bella back down, he took his place beside her, looping an arm casually around her waist and tugging her closer with an ease and familiarity that spoke volumes in the silent vision. _

"They… they're… " Edward started, struggling to process the scene or express himself. But he was locked in place, mind riveted on the scene Alice shared.

_Rosalie was smiling as she watched them, obviously approving and Emmett was saying something with his usual teasing grin, but Alice couldn't make it out with the way his head was turned. But it was something that had Bella burying her face in Jasper's neck and Rose elbowing her husband's side. For his part, Jasper leaned down to kiss Bella's temple before whispering something private that had her burrowing impossibly closer. The intimacy and affection between the pair was unmistakable. _

Edward whimpered, head shaking like a wet dog riding itself of extra water. It shook harder, attempting to knock the image from his head. No amount of movement would successfully dislodge it though.

_Suddenly Jasper stood, fluidly untangling himself from Bella and turning back towards the direction he'd come from with his arms opened wide and legs bent as though braced to catch something. Everyone else had stopped what they were doing as well; all eagerly looking towards what or who was coming. _

'_I'm sorry, Edward,' _Alice thought.

"No," he denied, going still. The utterance of a broken man.

Jacob was watching them, face scrunched in annoyed confusion. Leah's hackles were no longer up, but she was still tensed and primed to pounce at a moment's notice should the situation change.

"It's because of you. I couldn't see. I didn't know. But it was always dependent on your decision. You've just ensured its inevitability," Alice explained. She wasn't trying to hurt him, but he needed to understand his actions had lead to this. It wasn't Bella or Jasper. They hadn't betrayed him. _Edward _had betrayed them.

"No," Edward breathed again, shaking his head the slightest bit again. Once more he was the burning man from the living room. Alice hating causing him this pain. He was her best friend and closest sibling. She loved him so much. But this was unavoidable.

"What? What did you see?" Jacob demanded, wanting to know what she'd shown Edward. Alice knew he was worried that it had been Bella's death, which honestly was still a possibility.

"Bella's future," Alice said sadly.

"She'd never want him. Not like that," Edward said, shaking his head hopelessly. He grabbed Alice's hands, silently begging her to tell him it was a lie. That she'd been wrong. That this wasn't happening.

"Him?" Jacob asked, voice cautiously hopeful. The two siblings ignored him.

"She will. You've let her down too many times. That's all she'll remember after the change," Alice verified. The pieces were coming together now, they fit like keys in a lock. The events undeniably linked. Dominoes waiting to fall, each action triggering the next.

The vision came quick. It was no more than a brief glimpse, but it was surprisingly clear considering Jacob and Leah's proximity.

_The family was packing up the house, silently moving from room to room as odds and ends were collected. Blank faces boxed up their possessions. Not one person looked happy. In fact, they looked like corpses or sculptures trudging through on autopilot. _

_Bella and Edward were both missing. Rosalie was a shell. Pretty packaging for an empty vessel with haunted eyes. Emmett was carrying boxes from the house to load into the moving truck parked out front. It was nearly half full already._

Never before had Emmett willingly helped with the periodic moves. He, more than any of them, hated moving, and resisted the necessary change each time it happened. He'd always be running around distracting people or goofing off with the things others were trying to pack.

_Esme, instead of directing her troops and overseeing the entire process, was curled in a corner, crying over a picture. It was from Edward and Bella's wedding._

It didn't take much effort to figure out that Bella was dead. Probably Edward too. She hadn't been strong enough after all. There was no sign of the child, but Alice wouldn't have been able to see it regardless.

Alice hadn't seen a vision like this before. It was either unclear or blank, never certain death. What had triggered it now? And how had she seen it with Jacob standing just a few feet away? That didn't make sense, but she didn't have any answers just now.

"You mean if she even lives through it," Edward said hollowly.

"I think she will," Alice said carefully.

The latest vision had her second guessing herself and Edward knew it. He'd picked up on the errant thought. Along with the recognition that the vision hadn't been blurred or distorted in the least. Alice swallowed the sudden fear coating her mouth thicker than venom or blood.

"What are you talking about?" Jacob demanded, frustrated at being left out of the conversation. His fury momentarily forgotten.

"Why haven't you done something to stop it from happening?" Edward asked. He was glaring at her. Like it was her fault! Abruptly she was furious with him.

"_How could I? _ You disappeared! _You_ set this in motion! YOU!" she accused, no longer trying to spare his feelings.

"You could have -"

"Don't you dare blame me! I lost my husband because of you," Alice cried, her own pain over the situation stabbing her all over again, a mountain lion's claw shredding her immortal heart. "This is your fault, Edward. I've lost Jasper because you can't handle not being in control of every aspect of your relationship with Bella. Grow up and take some responsibility already."

"Bella and _Jasper_?" Jake said, understanding everything at once. The shaking began anew. Shutters racked his lethal frame. "I knew it. _Un-freaking-believable_!"

"Alice," Edward said, backtracking and continuing to ignore Jake. "Alice, I'm sorry. I'll fix this."

"It's too late," she said sadly. "They'll both be happier together than with us." It was the only thing she could think of to say that would get through to him. That would convince him not to interfere - the simple, undisguised truth.

_Jasper was laughing as he jumped from tree to tree, Bella chasing behind on the ground, smiling hugely. Then Jazz dropped from the tree, landing in a crouch. Bella pounced, tackling him to the mossy, leaf strewn ground. The two rolled through the underbrush, laughing so loud that the birds took flight. _

_When they came to a stop, Bella was beneath Jasper. He stared down at her with unconcealed love and desire. Bella's arms looped purposefully behind his neck as she tugged his head down for a kiss just as Jasper's hand slid up Bella's thigh and disappeared beneath the hem of her muddy, ruined dress._

"I can't," Edward gasped, jerking away from Alice, and squeezing his head as if that alone had the power to block what he'd seen. He turned towards the house, determined to right his wrongs.

"No. You made your choice. Now you have to live with it," Alice said, blocking his path. Jacob was there too, though Alice doubted he was all right with Bella ending up with Jasper. More likely he just didn't want Edward with her or hurting her again - however unintentionally.

"You always said you'd step aside if she chose another. It's time you honored your word. Especially considering you've done such a shit job of doing it so far," Jacob said.

"Go to Denali, Edward. Like Carlisle said. Lick your wounds. We'll let you know the outcome," Alice said. "I love you, Edward," she added quietly, trying to soften the blow.

Then her brother was gone.

"Follow him. Make sure he doesn't try to double back," Jacob said, glancing at Leah and tilting his head in the direction Edward had just headed in. The small grey wolf turned to race after the fleeing vampire, blending into the forest before disappearing entirely among the shadows.

The hard part was over. Edward knew now. Hopefully that would be the worst of it.

The memory of Bella's death had Alice itching to return to the house. She took off immediately with Jacob running beside her. She knew he was anxious to ask questions, and was grateful when he managed to restrain himself. She really wasn't up to rehashing everything just now.

The smell of blood - Bella's blood - could be smelled more than a mile out. Alice gasped and heard Jacob make a similar noise of distress. Then they were off, both running full out for the house, dodging branches and leaping fallen logs in a blur. Alice beat the wolf - barely - and only because he hadn't phased.

They were halfway up the stairs when Rose exited Carlisle's office. She was cradling a newly bundled child as though it was the most precious thing in the world, and to her, it probably was. The baby laid quietly in her arms. Jasper was barely a half step behind them, hovering anxiously, ready to snatch the child away to safety should the need arise.

The baby turned its head at the sound of her and Jake's approach. Alice heard a thump behind her, but paid it no mind, breezing past the trio as she ascended the stairs, skipping two at a time to move faster, and into Carlisle's office.

It was a scene from a nightmare. It had to be. No horror film could accurately capture the gruesome tableau she walked in on. Not and still have it seem believable. Alice wished it was impossible to believe. She stopped breathing at once, terrified by the sheer amount of gore covering every surface in her line of sight.

In the smallest fraction of a second, everything came into crystal clear focus. The harsh medical lights throwing the red into stark relief against the previous light colors of the room. Carlisle was attempting to stem the flow of blood from Bella's midsection, but spurts kept spraying upward like a water fountain turning on. It was splattered across his chest and the nearby wall. A bright arch of dripping scarlet against the pristine white. Little drops trailed all the way down to elaborate on the new decorations.

Then there was the spreading pool of standing blood inching insistently across the hardwood floor. Another table was covered with bloody rags and had a bowl of red tinted liquid sitting atop. That must have been where the baby was cleaned.

Carlisle's desk, despite being pushed to the edge of the room, was in pieces, books and papers littered the floor. Another wall had an indent in the shape of a person. Though some of the drywall had cracked and broken, falling to leave a sizable hole. The pale debris looked as though it had been trampled mostly to dust. Part of that dust had mixed with Bella's spilled blood till it resembled burgundy sludge.

A smear of crimson stained Carlisle's alabaster chin too, a single smudged line. Alice notice the tips of his hair were red as well, almost as if he'd deliberately dipped it into the huge hole in Bella's body. Alice could actually see _inside_ Bella. _Were those her organs? _

Carlisle's hands continued their efforts to staunch the bleeding even as he learned down to bite each of Bella's wrists. Just a quick pierce with his teeth. The quick nips not lasting more than a sixteenth of a second.

Meanwhile, Seth was at Bella's side. His hands were working feverishly over her chest as he administered chest compressions, pressing and relaxing in steady, rhythmic motions. It registered that he was performing CPR. He was forcing her heart to continue pumping and circulating the venom Carlisle was introducing into her system.

Bella was so still, limbs thrown unnaturally askew. Her ghostly complexion making her look like a wax statue. With the amount of blood coating the room, Alice would be surprised to learn any even remained inside Bella's broken body. She'd been beat to hell. More black and blue than peach and cream.

"Her spine broke," Seth grunted, sensing Alice standing behind him. "But she's going to make it, Alice. We won't stop until we know it worked."

Affection and terror warred within her. Seth was trying to keep Bella alive, even if it meant helping her become a vampire, the very thing his instincts guided him to hunt and destroy. But Alice also knew it was only thanks to his efforts that Bella's heart was beating at all. Without him, her sister would already be lost to them. She'd been so utterly broken this night - emotionally and physically.

And her spine? Her spine was broken on top of everything else? No wonder she was twisted up more than a pretzel.

Alice wanted to demand answers. Bella had been fine not even thirty minutes ago. Sitting on the couch, recovering from the inadvertent injury, and preparing for her final days as a human. How in the world how things deteriorated so rapidly in the short span of time that Alice had been gone? How could things have fallen apart so quickly?

"Quickly, Alice, the syringes," Carlisle said. "Before it's too late." Alice realized his hands were unavailable. If he reached for the venom himself, Bella would bled out. What if she already had and their efforts were wasted?

Alice was at his side in an instant, grabbing the first two syringes of venom from the table he'd placed them on less than two hours ago when she'd come to him with the suggestion. Had it really only been one hundred and three minutes?

"Move," she commanded Seth, using her only oxygen to voice the word and waving her fingers to knock his hands aside.

He anticipated her movements and had his hands clear just in time to avoid her blow. Seth took the opportunity to press his lips to Bella's, blowing deeply into her mouth. Once. Twice.

Alice plunged both needles deep into Bella's rising chest - straight into her heart. Seth's hands immediately returned to forcing her heart to beat the moment she'd finished depressing the plungers. He frantically worked to push the fresh venom through her heart and into Bella's arteries. The muscles of his arms strained with the effort, rippling and flexing with each huffed exhalation. His motions keeping pace with his own labored breathing.

Alice grabbed two more venom filled needles and injected them into either side of Bella's neck. The last two Alice inserted into Bella's groin. While Alice had used the prepared syringes, Carlisle had bitten each of Bella's legs and the creases of each elbow, all the while holding the gaping hole in her midsection closed - the hole that had been cut to extract the baby. It already seemed to be partially sealed shut. Carlisle must have licked the incision to use his venom in an attempt to bind the area.

Alice had never heard of anyone receiving so much venom before. She also doubted anyone had ever been this far gone before when a change was attempted.

Would it be enough? Would too much venom actually do more harm than good?

"Is it enough?" Seth panted, voicing her question aloud to Carlisle. He hadn't slowed or ceased administering compressions as he worked to save Alice's beloved sister. Sweat glistened, droplets sliding down his temples and neck to leave wet streaks behind, and made his white shirt stick to his muscled chest and back.

"I can't be sure. None of the others had endured such extensive injuries," Carlisle admitted.

Alice retreated as far as she dared before speaking. "Is her heart beating on its own?" Alice asked hesitantly, knowing it must for the change to happen.

Alice was relieved that all the venom circulating in Bella's body dulled the desire for her blood. She could speak and resist. Bella no longer tempted her as food. Alice was in control of herself. Her senses were confused enough that she was forced to swallow the copious venom that had pooled excessively in her mouth, however, thanks to the rich, cloying scent of the spilled blood thickly coating numerous surfaces in the room.

Carlisle met her eyes momentarily, then looked at Seth. Worry made her father look a decade older.

Slowly, so slowly, Carlisle instructed, "Stop, Seth. We need to check."

Seth looked to Alice, waiting for her nod of approval before he let his hands stop their ceaseless, life-saving motions. But his hands hovered, only an inch above Bella, ready to resume their efforts should they be needed.

Each person held their breath as they listened. Alice felt like crying when she heard it, a smile twisting her lips.

_Lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub._

Alice saw it at the same moment.

_Bella was sheathed in the blue silk dress that Alice had always intended for her. She was laid out on the current table, now cleaned of all traces of the horrific birth and transition, with her gently curling mahogany hair cascading around her enhanced form. Still as a statue, not a muscle flickered in the ivory beauty. Jasper was standing beside the table, watching her closely. Then, without warning, she opened her bright, scarlet eyes for the first time. A single gasp escaped the newborn's lips._

Bella's heart was beating, strong and steady. They'd done it. They'd saved her. She was changing.

"She'll be exquisite," Alice informed the others.


	8. 8: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

I was so tempted to have Bella absolutely hating Edward in this chapter, but that seemed really out of character, so you'll just have to wait a bit to see why she'll be able to do an about face with him. I'm trying to keep her as in character as possible, even when it's annoying to do so. Don't worry, eventually she will let him have it, and Edward will still get a happy ending… eventually.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 8 - Bella

At first there was nothing. No pain. No reality. No heartbreak. No complete destruction of the happy forever that had been just within Bella's reach.

When Edward first appeared in the room, Bella had been skeptical, yet cautiously hopeful. The instinct to shield her child should Edward say something cruel clicked into place, like the metallic shutters the Cullens used on their windows. Her weak arms had curled protectively around her belly to act as a physical barrier at the very least. Then Edward had opened his mouth and justified her fears.

Eternity passed as Bella watched the place Edward had vanished from. Minutes. Weeks. Years. She watched. Waiting. Maybe he'd come back. Maybe all the blood was making her hallucinate. She did have a history of Edward visions that weren't real, after all.

But if it had really been a vision, it would have played out differently.

She could almost picture him kneeling before her, holding her hands as he spoke the magical words she'd expected him to say to explain himself and repair the damage he'd inadvertently done to their relationship - their marriage. The marriage he'd wanted so badly she'd agreed to because she loved him enough to put aside her beliefs and ideals for the sake of his.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I never should have left. We'll get through this - together. We can make it through anything so long as we are together. I love you, and our baby. I will love you both forever."

_Forever_.

The very thing she wanted most. Forever with her family. Her baby. Edward. Forever.

Edward's perfect voice echoed in the silence. The words Bella longed for repeated over and over, before fading to nothing. The tender reassurance prompting her to easily forgive him for breaking his promise not to leave her again.

He still wanted her - her, Bella Swan. She was nothing special, but he'd still picked her. Of course she could forgive him for panicking and behaving rashly. He'd only done it because he was so worried about her. She understood. And he came back. That was all that mattered. No permanent harm had been done.

Bella blinked. The conjured Edward vanished even faster than the real one had fled. The memory of the wished for words, the opposite of the ones actually spoken, crumbled to dust. They were incapable of holding up when examined in the light of day.

Then it hit - with all the force and subtlety of a high speed train. The universe had torn open, a black hole of agony waiting to suck her in, consume her so completely that not a trace of her would remain.

Edward was gone. Again. _For the third time. _He didn't love her. Maybe he never had. There was no other explanation that made sense. It hadn't happened at all like her fantasy. No. Instead, Edward had come in and tried to convince her to kill her child and sleep with Jake. Like it wouldn't matter who she had sex with. As if the act wasn't the special joining she'd viewed it as. Guess he really hadn't enjoyed being with her as much as she had with him.

Then he'd threatened to murder his child.

Only a heartless monster would ever say such a thing.

He'd warned her - repeatedly - that that's what he was. She'd never believed him. Until now.

In all the times Edward had demonstrated his high-handedness, and overbearing, protective nature, Bella had been unable to stay mad at him. Not once. Always, she could rationalize and excuse his behavior. This time was different. She could not be so forgiving when her baby's life was at stake. This time it was about more than just her. She would always put her child first now. Edward could not be given a pass after admitting he planned to kill her baby.

Maybe he'd been right all along with his assessment of himself.

No! No, she could not believe that. Edward just couldn't see himself properly. His perspective was skewed. He was letting his misguided ideas about a soul influence him. That must be driving his actions now too. He was punishing himself because he couldn't imagine deserving all that he was getting by becoming a father.

But what if she was wrong? What if she was giving him the benefit of the doubt just like she always did, and he tried to carry out his threat? What if she really did die and Edward tried to kill the baby in retaliation? Her innocent child whose only crime was to be strong like his father.

"Bella? Bella, talk to me," Jasper commanded. "Say something. Anything. Please, darlin'," he begged, cool hands moving to gently cradle her face.

Bella's mouth wouldn't work and her eyes wouldn't focus. Was she even trying? Bella couldn't tell. What was the point? It wasn't like talking would make this situation any less soul-crushing.

"Carlisle, do something," Rose demanded. Bella didn't know where Rosalie was or if it even mattered.

Suddenly the idea of staying in this house where Edward could find her, find her and her baby, absolutely terrified her. What if they delivered the baby and he came back to hurt it while she was changing? There'd be nothing she could do. Her baby would be helpless. He'd be at the nonexistent mercy of his father. The urge to flea, to find somewhere safer became her most pressing desire.

The next few moments happened in slow motion, the way all inevitable events seemed to.

Bella lurched up from the couch, jerking free of Carlisle and Jasper, neither of which expected the move nor did they try to stop it. Expect Bella's stiff legs couldn't support her when they didn't move with her - at least not properly. They remained curled up on the couch as they'd been once Carlisle finished his earlier examination of her latest injury.

Teetering, Bella tipped, falling like a freshly cut tree. The two vampires both held their arms out to catch her, but she twisted, trying to see her uncooperative legs, confused about why they weren't working. Her altered body was even more uncooperative than she was used to.

Bella felt, more than heard, the strange ripping sensation in the center of her body. It was an unraveled thread getting tugged apart at the seam.

"Oh!" she gasped.

The world swayed, blurring and spotted with dancing flicks of black spots. Bella expected the sensation of falling to make her stomach pitch, but she couldn't really feel anything. None of her limbs were working.

A growl punctured the silence just as her perspective changed. Her supine body was floating upward. Bella's eyes rolled, and she had the impression she'd become a hot air balloon, her head filled with hot gas making her light enough to float higher and higher into the clouds.

Jasper's face came into view just above her, teeth bared at someone nearby. Light glistened and shattered off the gleaming surface of the sharp edged teeth. Little rainbows formed above her when it happened, but they were patchy from the dark spots. Full of holes like swiss cheese.

Bella's neck didn't cooperate when she tried to see who Jazz was growling at, but she heard the person respond. "I need to see what happened, Jasper," Carlisle insisted.

Bella's body jerked, the movement originating from inside her middle, making her body twist and contort like a sadistic marionette was pulling her strings. The wrenching inside her brought with it an explosion of pain.

Her midsection had just been t-boned by a bulldozer.

Fiery blasts of yellow, orange, and red bloomed across her eyes in a rioting starburst of burning agony, blocking her vision. It left a shimmering haze of red in its wake, like looking through iridescent gauze.

Several bones cracked - more ribs. The deep throbbing ache radiated outward and made breathing impossible. How can lungs expand when they have serrated knives piercing them? Had a stampede just paraded across her?

The lack of oxygen, the shock, was too much. Darkness crept in slowly. Bella shoved the inky void away, but it was insistent. She shoved it again, though less forcefully.

A heaviness that made it impossible to interpret her surroundings or the situation descended, unstoppable.

The darkness offered peace. It didn't hurt as much. Why was she trying to resist the blessed relief? She couldn't remember. Rest. A break from the pain. An escape from knowing Edward didn't want her enough to stay. Those were her only desires.

Then there was nothing. Nothing but an endless ebony sea. Nothing.

* * *

Bella snapped back to consciousness with a vengeance. She could not surrender to the peaceful oblivion. Not yet. She had to fight. Her child's life depended on her!

Time had lost meaning, but the crushing panicked energy of the people surrounding her made it clear that very little time had actually passed.

"The placenta detached. The child is suffocating." Bella knew that voice. Carlisle. What had he said? What was happening to her baby?

Bella opened her mouth, trying to speak, but no sound came out. Sheer terror that she couldn't demand answers or beg for help clamped down on her mouth, pressing the locked up words roughly against her tongue. Pain had effectively gagged her.

"Then get him out!" Rosalie screamed, louder than Bella could have. The command mirrored Bella's own most fervent wish.

Fear. It plagued her. This was all Edward's fault. She'd have been able to let Carlisle operate under safely controlled conditions if he hadn't come back and said what he had. That disastrous confrontation had triggered all of this. Bella fully believed that Carlisle would have been able to save both her and her baby if Edward had not initiated all of this. Now even her baby might die. This current danger was his fault.

"I've only just given her the morphine. It needs -"

"Get him OUT!" Bella cried past the congealed lump in her throat. The force of the words rocked her, fueled as they were by desperation. "He can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"

Bella couldn't see anything. The pain wasn't registering either. Not anymore. Not even when her body flopped and writhed out of her control. All she knew was fear. Fear that they'd be too late. Why weren't they moving faster? Why hadn't they just ripped her apart already to save her innocent little boy? Why hadn't Carlisle shredded through her delicate skin wrapping to free the dying baby trapped within? Who cared if she was in pain - just save her baby!

She tried to repeat her demand, to goad Carlisle into action, but again the words wouldn't come. Fresh blood had welled up her throat, fountaining into an artesian spring. The fluid leaked from her parted lips.

An impression of sucking on a mouthful of copper pennies came to her. Then she was choking on them. Choking on pennies and the coppery saliva - no, wait, it was blood filling her mouth. Blood that she couldn't swallow. She tried to use her tongue to shove the unwanted substance out, but the appendage was thick and sluggish. She coughed and choked, but more brackish blood was there to replace the small amount she managed to dislodge with her weak actions.

Bella continued gagging, unable to inhale the fresh air her aching lungs craved. She jerked, neck stretching to reach the oxygen her body cried out for. It was just out of reach. Something cold and immovable held her down, pinning her shoulders as her hips jerked crazily against the hard table.

Blackness lingered on the periphery again, but she stubbornly refused to let it advance. Her world was awash in red and black. No other colors existed.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Carlisle murmured. She didn't know why he was sorry. Was he refusing her? He couldn't! He'd agreed to save her child, to put the baby's life first. He had to!

"How can I help?" Seth asked, and Bella felt a muted warmth seep into her hand where a soft pressure gripped it.

"Help Rose hold her still," Carlisle instructed. "But keep her airway open."

Something warm and large shoved into her unresponsive mouth, wiggling and swiping quickly before retreating. She didn't even have time to gag when it happened again. Refreshing oxygen filled her starving lungs then, dulling the burning ache that had overtaken her. Gulping greedily, Bella downed more of the sweet air she'd been deprived of.

Bella blinked rapidly, trying to see the new figure that loomed over her head, his warm hands sliding under her shoulders to lift her, replacing the cold steel that had previously restrained her. The propped position made it easier to breath through the newly cleared airway.

Vague shapes and outlines, all dark but rimmed in a halo of red, came to Bella. She could just make out the fountain of blood spraying from her lower abdomen. It splattered the walls, thick and bright.

There was no pain. Nothing physical. Only panic for her child. And rage. Rage that Edward had endangered her baby. Her fury was icy hot, and sharper than a scalpel.

Suddenly Jasper was in the room, slamming into Rose. Groans and growls tore through the room, but they lacked context. Their movements were a blur that Bella's slow human mind couldn't keep up with. Then Jasper was yanking Rosalie's arms back so far Bella heard the grinding of granite rock breaking apart over the irregular roar of blood pounding in her ears like conch shells were permanently fixed over them.

Bella couldn't understand what was happening. No words escaped her filmy, bloody mouth to beg for an explanation. She didn't have the energy or the ability to form the sounds necessary to ask.

Then an even louder sound reverberated around the room. The sound of an ancient redwood splitting in half. The sound of a bomb detonating. The noise carried over the steady waves of blood throbbing in her ears. She didn't even have enough energy to be curious about the source of the sound. Only fear that it was Edward attacking someone she loved, trying to keep his promise - for once. The one time she didn't want him to.

Her heavy eyelids fell shut, refusing to stay open a moment longer. Numbness had set in. Her body was no longer being snapped apart as it was tortured. She was lost inside herself. Floating away on endless waves. Dragged haplessly along by the current. How was she supposed to keep her heart beating when she couldn't feel it or find it to force it to work? What a joke that idea had been. She was only human. A weak pitiful human. How was she supposed to accomplish something so impossible? If only Edward hadn't…

Blackness.

She didn't know how long it lasted, but some small part still encouraged her to fight against it. So she tried.

Her baby. The thought compelled her to try harder. Demanded that she succeed.

Bella knew that if she gave in now there would be no coming back. She fought her body, yelled at it for failing her. Her baby still needed her. She needed to know her baby was safe. Yet even that desire wasn't enough to force her eyes open again. Why couldn't she be stronger? Why couldn't she be as strong as a vampire or a werewolf? Indeed, why must she always be the useless, pathetic human? That had always been her problem though…

Warmth pressed against her mouth, and the dull ache in her chest eased. It repeated. Again. And again. The action prompted Bella to continue drawing in air on her own, desiring the relief the action provided, however fleeting. Awareness of even that much was fading quickly though.

"Seth, take the baby. I have to stop the bleeding if we have any hope of saving her," Carlisle said.

Bella's baby was safe. She'd done the most important thing - stayed alive long enough for her child. She could finally rest.

The warmth left her. In its place was an aching, bone-deep cold. It left her more numb and empty than ever. It was the cold of approaching death combined with the absence of her child.

"Bella, look. Come on - open those eyes and look at her. It's a girl - Renesmee," Seth coaxed. There was wonder in the request, a sort of tangible marveling. What? Her baby?

It was enough to do the impossible. To tempt Bella when her own will was not sufficient enough. The chance to see her daughter, her perfect baby girl. Renesmee, not CJ. Not the miniature Edward from her dreams. Of course it was a little girl. Why had she ever thought differently?

It was the little girl her mother had predicted she'd be able to give her hair comb to. Even if Bella wasn't around, her daughter would inherit the heirloom from her family. A momento she could keep forever. It was a nice thought. A welcome knowledge.

"Let me… " Bella begged, arms lifting up a fraction to reach for her precious child. She did not have the strength to hold them up for long, and before the child was placed within them, they fell limply to her sides. "Give her to me," she pleaded, eyes searching for the first glimpse of the child she'd just brought into the world. Her daughter.

Seth kept the child in his arms, knowing Bella lacked the strength. But he moved closer, hovering over her. Bella's eyes searched, blinking away the blood from broken capillaries for a proper look.

Then she was there. Lips, the color of pale pink rosebuds puckered slightly, almost frowning. Peach cheeks, flushed with the warmth of blood in her veins showed through the mess of childbirth. Chocolate brown eyes, identical to her own, looked around from dark, long-lashed almond shaped eyes. The perfect, unbelievably beautiful baby's head was topped with thick, blood matted curls that would likely be copper once cleaned.

She didn't appear quite like a typical newborn. She looked older somehow, weeks old maybe. The differences weren't readily identifiable. It was too hard to tell. There was a flash of gleaming white in her mouth, but Bella didn't know what it was.

The little girl was twisting and wriggling, looking around as if startled. Renesmee took quick breaths, little pants as she silently searched her surroundings. Then her eyes met Bella's and stilled. Her breathing slowed too.

Bella and her daughter stared at one another for the briefest moment. It was long enough for Bella to understand the true depths of her heart. The well of her heart, her ability to love, was significantly, infinitely deeper than she'd ever guessed. A bond formed, unbreakable and unending, between herself and Renesmee.

Hatred for Edward swelled too, though it was pushed to the back of her mind in order to make room for the love she felt for her child. It was there though. She knew it was there, this undeniable hatred she felt for Edward. She hated him for threatening the perfect creature before her. Hated him for not being here, not witnessing the miracle that was the birth of their child. Hated him for doubting her ability to do this. Hated him for ever suggesting that their daughter could possibly be a monster.

"Renes… mee," Bella weakly moaned. The infant smiled. There was no other way to describe the way her lips curled. "So… beautiful."

Bella's eyes closed, only just managing to reopen. She didn't want to miss a moment of seeing her daughter.

"Give her to me. I've got it under control," Rose said softly, coming slowly into the room and approaching the table cautiously, hands raised before her.

Bella didn't want her baby to go anywhere. She wanted to be the one that got to hold her. But how could she if her arms wouldn't work?

"She does," Jasper confirmed, glancing at Carlisle.

"Carlisle needs your help. Give me the baby, Seth. I'll take care of her until Bella… "

Bella watched sadly as Rosalie easily lifted the child from Seth's arms, a feat she herself was unable to do. What if this was the last time she ever got the chance to see Renesmee? What if she wasn't there to protect her in the future?

"Jazz, prom… ise," Bella breathed, the words forced past her lips with the final dregs of her tattered will.

"I know. I will. Hang in there, Bella," Jasper said, moving close behind Rose. Though the pair flashed in the negative, a fading afterimage. "You'll see her again in a couple days," Jasper vowed.

Bella wished she could see him, take in the sight of her daughter's protector one last time, but all she could do was picture him in her mind standing guard over the innocent child, a noble knight. The honorable Confederate soldier dedicated to saving women and children.

Her eyes had stopped working. They no longer saw her daughter or her family.

Then she was aware of nothing.


	9. 9: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 9 - Jasper

A deafening growl ripped from Jasper as his arms encircled Bella's falling form. Carlisle had been right there trying to catch her as well. Embarrassment immediately shot through Jasper for having allowed his instincts to control his reaction so completely. Yet they screamed at him even now to protect Bella from whatever was hurting her and the baby - even if that threat was Carlisle.

"I need to see what happened, Jasper," Carlisle insisted. He added more quietly than Bella's human ears could hear, "She needs to be examined. You heard - I need to know what that was so I can help them."

Jasper's instincts continued to roar at him not to let another touch the compromised woman in his arms. She was helpless. He had to keep her safe. She trusted him to keep her safe. It was his nature to listen and let his senses guide his actions. That instinct was the reason he was still alive after facing thousands of enemy vampires. Nearly all of whom were dead. Many, most actually, at his hands.

Bella went completely limp against him, her chest no longer rising and falling properly. Jasper looked to Carlisle, ready to demand he fix them, but Bella's body began twitching, jerking and thrashing like there were jumping beans trapped within her stomach. Jasper tightened his hold to keep her from falling as she flopped in his arms.

Blood from broken capillaries smeared across Bella's cornea. Her eyelids lowered as if trying to clear the obstructing fluid, but her eyes did not reopen. They remained closed. She was unconscious.

"Upstairs. Now!" Rosalie commanded. "We have to get the baby out immediately or they'll both die!" She and Carlisle were already on the stairs. Jasper raced up after them, Bella's contorting body cradled gently yet securely against his chest.

More bones broke in the single second it took him to reach Carlisle's office, snapping and popping, sounding like rice krispies in milk. Jasper didn't have his arms completely out from beneath Bella when Carlisle stabbed a needle into her hip.

"Morphine," Carlisle said quickly, hands raised placatingly when Jasper growled at him, unable to help his reaction to the unknown danger Jazz sensed from the action.

He felt feral at the moment, and it was only the knowledge that Carlisle was trying to spare Bella additional pain that allowed him to stand there and watch intently as Carlisle used a second needle to administer another dose of the numbing medication, this time into her arm, without interfering or attacking. His fists were balled and his jaw was clenched with the effort it took not to grab Carlisle or take a dangerous snap at him.

There was a row of needles, one more in a normal syringe, and six in the silver metallic tubes that Jasper recognized from when he'd extracted his venom on a tray beside the operating table he'd deposited Bella on. Rosalie was darting about the room turning on all the extra lights Carlisle had brought up earlier today in preparation for the delivery.

The delivery that shouldn't be happening yet. They'd spent the day prepping and preparing for it. There was a plan to make sure that it happened as safely as possible for both of them. Then Edward came in like a wrecking ball and left a path of devastation in his wake. How utterly predictable.

The harsh glare from the additional fluorescent lights left Bella with a sickly greenish pallor like some ghoul from a horror film. Her body was still twitching like a psychiatric patient undergoing shock therapy. Jasper didn't know how to help, but Carlisle and Rosalie seemed to have it under control, each moving about the other as they readied and assessed Bella. It took no more than three seconds to ready the room and the patient for what was to come.

Jasper focused on Bella's face, not wanting to witness the damage when Carlisle ripped Bella's shirt open to see her protruding stomach while also reaching for her neck to quickly take her pulse. Jazz let his fingers brush her cheek, willing her to stay strong for just a little bit longer. Soon enough it would be effortless for her to be strong. She just had to hold on long enough to make it through this.

Meanwhile, Rose moved to restain Bella's writhing, twisting frame. Her fingers curled like marble clamps around Bella's overly thin, skeletal shoulders rendering her upper body completely immobile even while her hips undulated erratically.

This was one instance where it would certainly be beneficial to be able to manipulate emotions, to keep everyone calm and in control. But Jasper's gift was unresponsive, too animalistic to access and use properly. He felt like a wild beast trapped in a snare, his insides thrashing about every bit as much as Bella's body physically was at this moment. As it was, he couldn't even properly process what the other's were feeling just now. It was all too much.

He was honed to handle strategic action and violence. Careful planning followed by strength, cunning, and brute force. Those skills were useless just now. Why had he never tried to learn anything medical from Carlisle? Oh, right. He lacked the necessary control that would have allowed him to learn the skills that could help Bella just now.

"Carlisle, stop wasting time," Rose commanded as she braced Bella's shoulders even more firmly against the operating table. "What happened? Will the baby be all right?"

"The placenta detached. The child is suffocating," Carlisle said, running a light hand over Bella's distended abdomen where the baby was desperately trying to escape.

"Then get him out!" Rosalie roared, releasing Bella long enough to shove a scalpel at Carlisle. "Or I will," she added when he didn't immediately take the instrument.

"I've only just given her the morphine. It needs -"

"Get him OUT!" Bella screamed, the strangled shriek unexpected. When had she returned to consciousness? How much pain must she be in? "He can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"

Jasper retreated from the room, backing into the hall the moment Carlisle's hand closed around the sharpened surgical blade. He could not be so close with Bella's blood flowing freely. He was not that strong. Fear of losing his precarious composure outweighed his desire to watch the proceedings for himself, and be there to know what was happening.

On autopilot, Jasper moved to the top of the stairs, breathing the fresh - well, _fresher_ \- air. Seth was standing there, looking passed Jasper to the room they could both hear the others working furiously in.

Concern and fear billowed from the pup like clouds of cigar smoke, insufferably thick.

"Do they need help? The blood doesn't bother me. I could… " Seth offered hesitantly. Jasper hated his weakness right then, but was grateful another could do what he could not.

"Yes, go. Help them, Seth," Jasper encouraged, moving aside as the young wolf strode purposefully passed and into the death room.

Even saying those few words allowed the scent of Bella's blood to surround him and invade his senses. It was tainted with morphine, so it _had_ successfully spread, but it still smelled sweeter than an ice wine or a chocolate souffle.

The feel of another's mindless bloodlust drifted out from the room. Jasper was at the open doorway without pausing to consider the dangers. He was consumed with the urge to protect the two that had placed such unbridled trust in him.

"No, Rose!" Carlisle yelled, scared and horrified.

Bella's body was flailing about, jumping and flopping. Each movement sent a fresh surge of blood passed Carlisle's remaining hand. The other was held up to stop Rosalie. He'd partially moved to shield Bella from Rosalie's attack, but his abandonment meant Bella was in danger of bleeding out.

All the while the baby was still suffocating.

Not daring to waste another moment analyzing the scene, Jasper moved to intercept his sister, slipping between Rosalie's advancement and Bella's unconscious, battered body. In an instant, Jasper used Rosalie's arm to flip her over his shoulder. She landed on Carlisle's desk in the corner of the room with enough force to crack the wood and scatter the papers resting atop it.

Rosalie launched herself forward again, springing off the splintered surface. The antique piece of furniture, one that Carlisle had owned and used for well over a century, protested the harsh abuse, creaking loudly as it came apart. It was no match against vampire strength. Chunks of wood came free under the pressure, falling to the floor among the disarrayed documents. The white sheets floated through the air like lazy snowflakes.

With one hand, he caught Rose by her throat in mid leap, gripping tightly. With the other, he snagged her arm. Then, with a brutal twist, he had her pinned to the wall, the tips of her toes barely brushing the ground, and preventing her from using it to propel herself forward again. Rosalie's head turned back towards Bella, and Jasper growled, low and threatening. He shoved her again, this time hard enough to leave a dent that perfectly outlined the shape of her body in the wall.

Plaster split. A long crevasse that ran all the way up to the ceiling. Bits of the ivory wall rained down. Esme was going to have conniptions when she saw the damage.

Rosalie's teeth snapped viciously, but she couldn't angle her head enough to catch hold of him. She wanted the blood, but Jasper had trained Rosalie to fight, seen her engage in combat multiple times. She was not giving her all. As lost as she was to the call of blood, it had not managed to completely enthrall her.

But she was definitely not in control either. Not completely. Not enough to stop herself from attacking should Jasper release her. That knowledge was enough to have his fingers squeezing Rose's throat tighter, an inherent threat.

Protect Bella and the baby. Those were the only thoughts running through Jasper's head. Somehow he was managing to ignore the siren call of Bella's blood. It hardly registered at all for the first time ever. He was lost to the need to protect above all else.

Rosalie's fingers clawed at his wrists, her long nails slipping, unable to find purchase several times before digging in painfully as she tried unsuccessfully to dislodge him. He'd heal as soon as she released him though. A few claw marks were nothing.

Her black eyes shifted once her talons were firmly in place, taking in Jasper's bared teeth, venom glistening like an oil slick in the unnatural light of the room. His sister shuttered, whimpering and cringing back into the wall, away from the danger he presented. Her hold relaxed in her attempts to escape. Fear of the pain he was capable of inflicting crept into the rational part of Rosalie's brain. She'd remembered what he was. Likely the sight of his scars had triggered her instinct to submit as a means of self-preservation.

"She's not breathing," Seth announced, an edge of panic sharpening the information. It cut deeper and easier than the scalpel Carlisle had used.

"Check her airway," Carlisle instructed calmly. He was busy trying to control the bleeding while also attempting to access the child trapped within. "Clear it, and breathe for her."

The interaction was enough to regain Rosalie's attention. Rusty copper bloomed like roses. The bloodlust swelled once more as she took in the pair working over Bella's mangled remains. Jasper glanced back to see it as well.

Seth's fingers were shoved as far down Bella's throat as they could reach, scooping the thick, congealing blood that blocked her ability to inhale the necessary oxygen required to keep her heart beating. _Don't give up_, he thought silently to Bella. Jasper could only barely hear the organ now, sluggish and strained, near to failing.

The sight of fresh blood set Rosalie off again. When she tensed, Jasper released her neck and spun her so that he could yank her arms behind her back, lifting enough that they groaned in protest. The sounds of rock creaking and grinding filled the room, a cacophony of noise that blended with those produced by Carlisle's teeth biting into the protective sac surrounding the baby.

The position they were in allowed the fighting pair to see the rivers of blood flowing from Bella's gaping midsection. The room was awash in gore, a virtual torture chamber straight out of the middle ages. It reminded him of the mindless slaughter he'd participated in during his days with Maria. Rose tensed once more to lunge at the buffet before her.

With the ease of decades of practice, Jasper slipped both of Rosalie's wrists into the palm of one hand, and used the other to send a blow to the side of her head, knocking it to the side, away from the sight of Bella laying so vulnerable only three feet away. His long arms encircled Rose's throat, securing her in a headlock before she'd had a chance to whip it back to face forward once more.

"Jasper, get Rose out of here - now!" Carlisle instructed.

It was all the prodding Jasper needed to start herding his sister out the door and upstairs - away from Bella and the open container of blood still sitting downstairs. He used his hold on her neck to guide her. Each wrangled step made it easier to haul the unprotesting blonde further away, and to flood her with calm. He bludgeoned her with it, battering her until it pierced the red craze gripping her.

Emmett and Esme were standing, still as statues as they listened to the events happening below. Esme's focus remained on her husband and the two he was trying to save, but Emmett tensed as though prepared to approach when Jasper lead Rose into the room.

"Is she -"

A quick shake of Jasper's head had Emmett halting. Jasper had the situation in hand.

He felt the moment Rose's bloodlust broke, only to be replaced with shame and horror. He could relate.

The moment she was in control again, he knew. His hold relaxed, and Rose turned her troubled eyes, no longer black with hunger, up to his, expecting censure or condemnation.

"I almost… "

Rosalie had always prided herself on her control and the fact it was nearly as good as Carlisle's. It was something she held over the others. But just now when it mattered the most, she'd lost it. Again, it was a realization Jasper could fully relate to.

"But you didn't," he said softly, offering the atonement she sought and needed.

A new sound filled the air. The flutter of a hummingbird's wings, only not a bird. A heart. A tiny, too fast, beating heart. The child's heart. Short staccato pants could be heard as well. Tiny mouthfuls of oxygen to fill miniature lungs. Hope and love washed over Rosalie's face making her impossibly more beautiful. She was radiant, incandescent with adoration for the tiny life that had just come into the world.

"Seth, take the baby. I have to stop the bleeding if we have any hope of saving her," Carlisle said urgently. Only Carlisle could be heard moving about one floor down. Him and the baby. Bella's thrashing had finally ceased.

"Wow," Seth whispered, awed. "She's… " Seth trailed off. Jasper could feel his amazement drifting up through the floor.

_She_. Renesmee. His niece - more - she was more than that to him. Of course she was. She was everything. The little girl he vowed to protect above all else. The innocent he'd been entrusted with.

"Mm-hmm," Carlisle murmured, clearly distracted by his efforts to save Bella.

"She's perfect," Seth continued quietly, apparently still fixated on the child he held. "Sam was wrong. She's just a little baby."

"Jasper… " Rosalie breathed, turning to look back at the door he'd lead her through. He felt her desperation to get back to the child, to be the one caring for her right now. A quick assessment eased his fears a fraction. Rosalie's desire to be a mother trumped all other emotions.

"Do you hear that? They need us right now. That baby is alone in this world and her mother won't be able to care for her for days. Renesmee's father is gone, and we promised to look after the baby. Can you do this?"

"Yes. Yes," Rosalie said cautiously, though she was nodding eagerly.

"Jasper, are you certain?" Esme said, forehead creased. She too looked as if she wished to be downstairs though she didn't dare.

Jasper nodded to the door, and followed close behind Rosalie as they headed quickly back down.

"Renes… mee," Bella weakly moaned. "So… beautiful." Her voice was a breeze too weak to rustle a dandelion's fluff. Scratchy and raw, more emotion than sound.

Only two steps into the room, Rose was begging for the child, pleading with Seth to relinquish his hold on Renesmee as she slowly approached.

"Give her to me. I've got it under control," Rose said softly, hands raised before her to accept the precious wriggling child still coated in blood and vernix.

"Jasper, does she?" Carlisle asked quietly, not looking up from where he was crouched low trying to repair some of the internal damage the baby had done so that Bella would survive long enough to transition.

"She does," Jasper confirmed, watching Carlisle's nimble fingers racing against the clock.

"Carlisle needs your help. Give me the baby, Seth. I'll take care of her until Bella… " Rosalie said, plucking the child up with exquisite gentleness.

"Jazz, prom… ise," Bella breathed, a wealth of sentiment backing the two small words.

"I know. I will. Hang in there, Bella," Jasper said, moving closer behind Rose. "You'll see her again in a couple days," Jasper vowed as Bella's blood-clouded chocolate eyes closed. Possibly forever.

Reality hurt. Far more than it should. When had Bella burrowed so deeply into his heart? When had he reached the point where he would miss her if she were gone from this world?

His family was so good at shutting people out. Keeping a necessary distance. Immortality was a burden few could comprehend. Fewer still understood it was worse for the immortal. Forced to live on with only the shadow of memory. The pale imitation of the thing you most longed for.

What would it be like if Bella didn't pull through?

Bella's heart, already put through the ringer this last week or so, finally gave out. There was one last tired _ga-lump_ then silence. Jasper waited, willing it to beat again, but it didn't. It had already endured the strain of ten lifetimes.

Bella hadn't beat the odds. She hadn't done the impossible. She was so unusual that Jasper had really started to believe her capable of overcoming anything. He'd been so certain…

Jasper's mouth opened to warn Carlisle, but Seth was already there, pushing down on Bella's chest. He settled into a consistent pace without being told. Would it be enough? How could it? Would he really never see or speak to Bella again? He'd only just started getting to know her. He wasn't ready for it to be over.

"We need to get Renesmee cleaned up," Rosalie said softly, hugging the infant closer to her chest and wiping the curious face and body with a damp cloth that had been left out on a nearby table along with other necessary supplies to look after the child in its first minutes.

Jasper hadn't even realized she'd started washing the child off. Given the fact that she was nearly done, it must have been as soon as she took the child from Seth. Jasper had been too caught up in Bella's fate to notice.

"Seth… " Jasper called, looking back and forth from Rosalie tending to the site of the cut umbilical cord, assessing her control, and Bella, where it was only thanks to Seth's efforts that her heart was reluctantly pushing blood through her body.

"I know, Jasper. I'll keep it beating - for however long I must," Seth promised, his arms moving steadily as he worked.

"Carlisle, don't stop until you're certain," Jasper commanded.

His father nodded, briefly meeting his eyes. "I won't."

Jasper wasn't sure if Carlisle understood what he'd meant. He'd been trying to say don't stop until he was certain Bella would make it, but Carlisle could have just as easily taken it to mean don't stop until you're certain she's dead. He was afraid to clarify, afraid Carlisle would only agree to the latter.

Jasper was unwilling to leave Bella. These last days had bound them irrevocably together. She was a part of him, and it felt like leaving an essential piece of his soul behind should he walk out the door just now. She was fighting for her life. He wanted to help. But what could he do?

How would he handle not being there for these final moments if she didn't pull through? He was terrified of never speaking to her again or exploring the new dynamic to their friendship. Things would be so different once she was one of them.

Then there was the baby to consider. The family was at its most vulnerable right then with Edward gone and several members distracted looking after Bella and the baby. It was the perfect time for Sam's pack to attack or for Edward to come back and do something drastic. He'd vowed to watch over Bella's little girl. It was imperative that he keep her safe from all things.

They needed to get to a more secure room, and away from this horror of blood and death. He didn't want this to leave an impression on the baby that was somehow already managing to support her head by herself and look around. Jasper felt Renesmee's overwhelmed and confused curiosity as she took in her surroundings.

"They've got this, Jasper. Help me look after Renesmee," Rose said, trying to make the impossible decision for him. She'd just finished wrapping a soft white blanket around the newborn and was moving towards the open door. They hadn't even been in Carlisle's office two whole minutes before she had the baby cleaned and settled.

Jasper was still warring with the decision when he heard two people approaching the house. Listening carefully, he detected Alice's light, loping run as she bound over the river on her way back. He didn't recognize the other person following close behind. The potential threat decided things for him. Renesmee needed him the most just then. He could actually do something to protect her.

Renesmee watched Jasper as he followed as close behind Rosalie as he could back to the hallway. Alice and her companion, he could tell it was Jacob now, had just entered the house. Renesmee's interest was snagged by the newcomers, and she turned her tiny head to investigate. Alice didn't spare them a glance as she raced past and into the room they'd just come from.

Jacob though… he'd momentarily frozen before his knees gave out and the floor rushed to meet the bones with a harsh knock. The jarring impact was louder than the sound of Seth administering compressions. It drown out all else.

Jasper had been ready to intercede, to attack Jacob if he behaved foolishly or brashly - as was his habit. But the staggering force of his emotional reaction when he saw Renesmee nearly sent Jasper to his knees as well.

Unmade. Jacob felt like a shapeless lump of unmolded clay. Just as quickly as he was undone, he was reformed, more whole and complete than he'd been previously. There had always been chunks of his person missing. Necessary, vital pieces that had made him come across as selfish and immature. Those missing pieces had been added now. He was suddenly a real boy, no longer Pinocchio.

Untethered. The world had shifted off its axis. Spinning, floating, spiraling. Up was down and down was up. There was no top or bottom to the planet. But just as quickly he was a meteor soaring through the air and crashing to Earth.

The intensity was enough to have Jasper taking a stunned step back.

Rosalie, having been so caught up in cooing at the baby, only noticed Jacob's prostrate form when Jasper retreated. She glanced back at Jasper for an explanation, though she was more annoyed with Jacob's presence than curious about why he was crouched on the floor before them.

"He imprinted," Jasper explained. "I can feel it. There was a bond that locked in place the moment he saw her."

"Gross," Rosalie said, lips twisted into a grimace. They all knew about imprinting and what it meant for the pair involved. Bella, Edward, and even Seth had explained it thoroughly. "She'll have better taste than to ever want him." Her words were dismissive, as though the matter was already settled. In her mind it probably was. From what Jasper felt though, it wouldn't be that simple.

Jacob's feelings were those of complete devotion, centered entirely on protecting and providing. Jasper had never detected such pure and undiluted love. There was nothing romantic about it, and it was still untarnished by life. The two had no shared experiences to influence the love one way or another. It was unlike anything Jasper had ever felt before, more powerful even than the bond that developed between vampire mates.

It was different also from what he'd sensed from the other wolves. They had baggage, history that impacted their relationships with their imprints. That would come for these two as well in time, probably partly impacted by Jacob's previous feelings for Bella. But for now it was love in its most perfect, pristine form.

"I'm not sure anyone would ever willingly turn away from something so intense. His devotion is absolute," Jasper said, still caught up in the swirl of new emotions he was reading. He wished he could tell Bella about it, but she was busy fighting for her very existence.

"As it should be," Rose said haughtily. "Just look at her. Have you ever seen a more perfect baby?"

Jasper took Renesmee in then, studying her features intently for the first time. Tiny, tight bronze ringlets crowned her head. She had Bella's eyes, the dark chocolate depths held every bit of the love and trust of her mother's. Her muted pink lips were Bella's too. The rest was all Edward, just softer, more delicate. She looked like a porcelain doll. Too perfect to be real.

"No," Jasper agreed, "I haven't."

Jake was still on the steps about a quarter of the way up. Too stunned to do more than stare at the baby. Rose began descending, Jasper just behind. Jacob didn't move. Rosalie just sniffed in disgust, nose wrinkled at the smell, as she walked passed Jake's kneeling form and into the kitchen to prepare a bottle for the baby she held. Jake popped up like a jack in the box to follow behind, seeming not to even notice when his shoulder brushed Jasper's as he did. The two entered the kitchen, following after Renesmee like she was the pied piper.

Several minutes passed before Jacob looked around, only just coming to realize there were others present.

His eyes landed on Jasper, who had just happily realized something vitally important. "Why are you staring at me like that?" Jacob asked.

Jasper could just imagine the calculating look on his face.

"Because I just gained an army to help me protect Renesmee. It's perfect. She'll be the safest child on the planet," Jasper announced. Rose chuckled as the child in question finished the bottle of human blood that she was feeding her.

There were two wolf packs, and with the imprint in place, both would be duty bound to protect Renesmee should the need ever arise. The wolves were no laughing matter either. Jasper remembered watching them fight. Ten wolves would be a significant force to be reckoned with if it ever became necessary to fight to protect his charge.

"Of course she will. I'll kill anyone who tries to threaten her," Jacob said with such conviction Jasper knew they were on the same page when it came to Renesmee's safety. That had been easier than expected.

"If I don't beat you to them," Jazz challenged, smiling wickedly at the idea. Jacob returned the smile.

Before this, Jacob would have had a sarcastic or disparaging comment for Jasper. He'd have said or done something provoking or insulting. Now he joked and conversed with him like they were pack members. United by their shared desire to look after the youngest Cullen.

In the blink of an eye, a single glance to be precise, Jacob had grown up. He'd become a true alpha and leader.

The shared moment was interrupted by Rose's gasp as she tried, unsuccessfully, to burp the baby. Renesmee's hand was pressed tight to Rose's cheek, resisting.

"What? What is it?" Jake asked, rushing forward to hover before them. His fingers spasmed like he was fighting the urge to snatch the baby away and check her for himself.

Jasper tested the others' emotions, searching for the cause of Rosalie's alarm. All he picked up was surprise from Rose, longing from Renesmee, and worry from Jake.

"She _showed_ me Bella," Rosalie said, looking at Jasper to emphasize her words.

"How? Why?" Jacob demanded, a cross now between worried and confused. "What's she talking about, Jasper?"

Renesmee turned to see what Rosalie was looking at. When she caught sight of Jasper, he felt the newborn's recognition. She remembered him. Somehow she knew him. Joy and excitement unfurled in his direction, along with an eagerness to have him come to her.

He was helpless to deny the little one. Jasper approached slowly, and when he was right beside Jacob, Renesmee reached out to him. Jasper clasped the chubby little fist in his fingers, noting the warmth and firmness of the infant's skin. Her tiny fingers curled around one of his, her palm pressing flat to his skin. He saw the same flash of a destroyed Bella that Rosalie must have seen. There was a demand that came with the image, and he understood at once.

"She's gifted, Jacob. Like Alice and myself. She wants to know where her momma is," Jasper explained, not letting go of the hand that had wrapped snugly around his extended fingers.

It was at that moment that they heard Carlisle order, "Stop, Seth. We need to check."

Each of them waited for the verdict, listening intently to discover if Bella's heart would manage to beat on it's own. To see if she would survive the ordeal. Jasper knew Esme and Emmett were waiting just as impatiently upstairs, unwilling to risk losing control to come downstairs just yet when it meant having to walk passed the room Bella currently occupied. The one filled with spilled blood. Pints of it covering a multitude of surfaces in crimson fluid.

Relief bloomed through the house like morning glories at dawn, coming at him from all directions when they heard it. Bella's heart was beating on its own. It sounded strong even. Powerful. Healthy. She was in transition. She would be one of them. Renesmee would not lose her mother this day. _Jasper_ would not lose her.

"Your momma is upstairs. You'll have to wait a couple days to see her, but I know she wishes she was with you right now. Your Aunt Rose and I will stay with you while you wait," Jasper said, detecting Renesmee's impatience to have her question answered. He felt her sadness at his explanation and he wished he could eliminate it. He also picked up on Jacob's irritation, though he had to admire the wolf's restraint at not voicing it. To that end, he added, "Jacob too will stay with you. Always."

Rose was intrigued by the way he was speaking to Renesmee. He'd explain later. For now he was amazed by the comprehension he felt coming from the child. She honestly understood everything he was saying. He could practically feel the connections and conclusions she was drawing from what he said.

"Thanks," Jacob muttered, bumping his shoulder. Then Jake's attention was back on the baby who'd taken to assessing the large Quileute. She seemed to be sizing him up. "But she's okay? Nothing is wrong with her?" Jake asked, a fierce need to be reassured driving his questions.

Jasper got the impression that Jacob was afraid to touch Renesmee. He was close, but not touching. He wondered how much experience Jake had around babies. Perhaps he was simply afraid of hurting her given his size and strength. He'd have to get over his fears quickly given the curiosity he was provoking in Renesmee. She could see that he was different from the others, and she wanted to understand why and how.

"No, Jake. There's nothing wrong with her," Jasper said softly as the rest of his family began assembling downstairs. Minus Alice and Seth. Jasper could hear Alice moving about upstairs as she readied Bella, and cleaned the mess left behind from the birth and change while Seth was making use of one of the showers. "Carlisle will be able to tell us more though."

"Indeed," Carlisle agreed. Finally coming down himself. "Rose, do you mind?" he asked, nodding to Renesmee.

Rosalie reluctantly handed the little girl to her grandfather. Carlisle immediately began examining her. He checked her responses and took her measurements. Each test was quick and efficient. Yet his frown etched itself deeper and deeper with each carefully aligned measurement. Concern and surprise permeated the room as he managed to get Renesmee to understand what he needed from her so his results were as accurate as possible.

"Have you noticed anything unusual?" Carlisle asked, then added thoughtfully, "Aside from the teeth and diet of blood, of course." He must have missed their discovery of her gift while he'd been working on Bella.

"She's already grown since Seth first handed her to me," Rose acknowledged before Jasper could speak up. He'd thought so too, but Rose was in the best position to know for certain how Renesmee's size had already altered.

Renesmee's hand landed on Carlisle's cheek. "Oh," he said, nodding at Renesmee, "yes. You are gifted. It makes sense given her - your - parents." Renesmee's small head turned, searching for those parents. Jasper felt her happiness when she saw him, and he sent her the same emotion back. It made her smile broadly. "Hmm," Carlisle murmured, watching them with Renesmee's palm still pressed against him.

Jasper chuckled at the gathered assembly's frustration when Carlisle didn't elaborate.

"What can she do?" Emmett asked.

"She can show you her thoughts and images," Jasper explained.

"So she gets in your head?" Emmett asked, cocking his head a bit as he looked at the baby in question.

"Exactly," Carlisle agreed.

"I'm sure she doesn't mean any harm by it," Esme said softly.

"No," Emmett agreed, "I was thinking it's Eddie-boy in reverse," Emmett muttered softly, nodding as he made the connection. "Makes sense."

"If you're finished," Rose said, already reaching to scoop up the child. Renesmee immediately burrowed against her aunt, tucking her head neatly beneath Rose's chin. Satisfaction formed a thick, impermeable bubble around Rose.

"But you haven't explained anything," Jacob pointed out, brow wrinkled in concern. "What's going on?"

"She's still growing quickly - like the pregnancy. Much more quickly than a human child. I'm not sure what it means yet. I'll need time to collect data and predict a trend," Carlisle said placatingly.

"But… " Jacob said anxiously, looking around at the others.

"It's too soon to know anything. But she does seem healthy," Carlisle said. "At least there's that."

Jasper felt his helplessness. Carlisle was still coming down from the terror of nearly losing Bella, his beloved daughter. Now he was faced with the unknown of his grandchild. For someone used to having all the answers given his vast experience in this life, this was all unfamiliar territory right now.

"Can I hold her?" Jasper asked Rose quietly. So far he'd been content just watching her, guarding her from the edge of the room. But with every minute over the course of the last hour since Carlisle had begun examining Renesmee, he'd drifted closer until he was right in the thick of his family clustered around the newest, or rather youngest permanent member. Bella was soon to be the newest.

Rose's amusement came before her agreement. Then she had the small weight nestled in his arms. Renesmee stared up at him, fascinated. He was equally enthralled with her. Jazz let her feel his wonder and awe, offering his genuine emotions - nothing artificial - as he opened a secret part of himself up to the innocent he held.

Her life would not hold the horrors of his own. She would not be forced to fight for her very survival. She would not know the shame of realizing she was nothing but a pawn to be used and discarded at another's whim. He would do anything to ensure she only ever knew the peace and love that came with being a member of the Cullen family.

That bright smile made a reappearance when she felt his gift. Happiness flowed easily from her, and Jasper hugged the child closer in response, his love for her multiplying impossibly. It was infinite.

Renesmee's fingers sought his cheek, the warm pudgy digits pressing lightly against him. He saw images, accompanied by unmistakable emotions and thoughts as she tried to convey her question.

"Oh," Jasper said, awkwardly looking around, as if seeking help or guidance.

"What did she show you?" Jacob and Rose asked together, then glared at one another.

"Bella," he answered slowly. "Then myself. She's… trying to make a connection," he explained uncomfortably. He knew what Renesmee wanted to know, but he did not know how to go about explaining the situation to an infant - even if she was unusually intelligent.

"So?"

"She wants to know if you're her father," Carlisle said sadly. "I suspected she thought so earlier."

"Yes," Jasper agreed, still feeling troubled. Was that how he felt about the little girl in his arms? As if she was his…

"He loves you very much, Renesmee," Alice said clearly, sliding between the others to rest her hand on Renesmee's back comfortingly. Jasper hadn't even noticed her joining the family, he'd been so caught up with Renesmee.

Renesmee reached to touch Alice's cheek, and Jasper felt it - happiness. It was strong and true. Alice was happier than Jasper remembered her being since before Edward's wedding. Her joy was twined with mischief and anticipation. At the moment, Alice was more herself than ever. It made Jasper realize how much he missed her. Not as a lover, but as a friend.

"Yes," Alice confirmed, nodding to Renesmee and failing to hide a knowing smile.

"What did she show you?" Rosalie asked, wanting in on the secret. The others were equally intrigued.

"The future I saw weeks ago," Alice announced.

"Alice?" Jasper quierred.

He watched as her eyes glazed over in the familiar way they did when she was having a vision. Jasper was surprised she even could considering Jake and Renesmee were both in the room. They'd have to discuss that more later.

"I think it best to let it play out. It will happen eventually no matter what, but it'll go over better if I don't interfere," Alice announced once her eyes had refocused on her surrounding family. "Just know everything will work out."

"You are unbelievably annoying sometimes," Emmett complained, scowling and crossing his strong arms like a pouting child.

Jasper didn't bother commenting. He knew pushing Alice wouldn't change her mind. It would be a useless endeavor, so there was no point wasting the energy. Besides, he'd rather concentrate on the little girl in his arms. She'd been content to watch the family speaking, even if she didn't fully understand. But now that she realized she had his undivided attention again, she rested her hand on his cheek and showed him how much she'd enjoyed the human blood Rosalie had given her earlier.

A chuckle escaped him. Yes, human blood was rather good. He let her feel his appreciation for it too, slightly surprised the memories and emotions weren't triggering his thirst. Easing from the cluster of his family, he moved towards the kitchen. He'd watched Rose prepare a bottle earlier, and was fairly confident he could do it himself without screwing up. Something about Renesmee made it incredibly easy to focus and remain in control.

"I'm going to feed her," he explained when he felt everyone's interest in where he was headed.

Rose rolled her eyes, "I suppose it is your turn. Let me know if you need help."

"I call next," Jacob said over the last part of Rose's sentence. The two started arguing, but Jasper ignored them. Renesmee was hungry and she was getting impatient.

The two continued exchanging emotions as Jasper fed the baby. He'd never have believed how easy it would be to open himself up to another. He didn't shy away from letting Renesmee feel his love for her or his joy over her very existence.

Just as she was nodding off, Jasper whispered, "Sleep, Mae. I'll watch over you."

Mae. It had been his little sister's name. He'd forgotten so much about her. Only vague impressions of tending a skinned knee, tugging on braided pigtails, and teaching her to dance remained. The baby in his arms reminded him how much he'd loved his baby sister, and wished he had access to more of his murky memories.

The love he felt for the little girl trustingly sleeping in his arms was similar to the love he'd felt for his sister. Not quite the same, but close enough to revive his memories. And Ruh-nez-_may_ was so close to the name Mae that the connection was there before he realized it.

Bella had been so proud of the name she'd come up with for her daughter. Now he felt a little anxious over her reaction when she learned he'd shortened it. Hopefully she'd understand the significance of the nickname. Perhaps he'd even get her blessing to use it regularly.

Esme entered the kitchen, moving to prepare some food for the wolves, but she paused a moment beside him. Jasper looked up, expecting to find her focused on the baby he held, but was surprised to find her watching him instead.

She laid a hand on his cheek and let him feel her love and pride. The emotions were endless, and given without restraint or conditions - the way only a mother can do for her child. She didn't say a word, not needing to voice everything she let him feel. He knew this was her way of acknowledging his part in saving Bella and Mae.

Jazz covered her hand with his, smiling and letting her feel his love for her. Esme's lips stretched, the sides tipping upward. After a minute she returned to preparing several racks of BBQ ribs and baked potatoes.

* * *

"She's still growing too fast," Jake said worriedly, scooping Mae up once Carlisle had completed his examination. Rose hissed, but let it be.

"It's slowed down at least," Em said reassuringly.

"Yes, but… I'm not looking forward to discussing this with Bella when she wakes," Carlisle said wearily.

Carlisle and Esme had spent the morning at the cottage preparing a room for Renesmee. The moment he'd returned, he'd begun checking the baby over again. Already she was visibly older. She looked at least a month old - not less than two days.

"And you don't know when that will be?" Jake inquired, looking to Alice.

Jacob wasn't asking because he was anxious about seeing Bella again or because he missed her. His interest in Bella had vanished entirely. No, he was worried about how she'd take learning about his imprinting on Renesmee. Jasper, given his experience with newborns, had a feeling she'd flip then get over it just as quickly. Newborns were renowned for their rapidly changing temperaments and mood swings. And Bella was always quick to forgive Jake, regardless of the situation.

"Not exactly. I can't see when with you here," Alice said.

"There have been a couple times now that you've been able to see despite them being here," Jazz pointed out, remembering how she'd seen Bella surviving the change once Seth had stopped giving her CPR and the wolf had still been with her. And that hadn't been the only time.

"Were the visions anything in particular?" Esme asked, sliding an arm around Alice's shoulder.

"No… well… " Alice said, pausing to think. A little crease formed in her brow. "They were all things I really wanted to know. Not just random decisions the family made. They were… well, I guess they were all major events."

"Perhaps that is the answer then," Carlisle said simply, nodding.

"That makes sense," Alice said slowly, starting to nod.

"I don't get it, doc," Jacob said, laughing lightly. Jasper could feel Jake's bafflement. His lips twitched as he fought a smile. Years of familiarity with Alice's sight and the inner workings of it made it easy for him to follow their line of thinking. It was amusing to realize it wasn't the same for the others. "Break it down for us mere mortals."

"Your presence acts as a barrier for the mundane. The minor, inconsequential decisions are blocked. But if it is important enough, nothing will prevent Alice from being able to see it so long as it doesn't directly involve the packs. Her gift is quite powerful," Carlisle explained.

"That makes sense, but it doesn't explain why I can't see the wolves," Alice complained, face scrunched up in dislike.

"Or Nessie," Jacob added. He was stubbornly holding onto his personal nickname for Renesmee despite the rest of the family and Seth taking to calling her Mae ever since they'd overheard him calling her that.

"Maybe it does," Seth interjected.

"How so?" Alice demanded, frustrated that someone else figured it out before her. And since it was a wolf, she couldn't see the answer beforehand.

"You said we're barriers, Carlisle," Seth said, looking a little uncertain. Probably hoping no one would laugh at his hypothesis. He concluded, "We're only barriers because she isn't one of us."

"You mean because she isn't a wolf?" Jasper said, realizing what he'd meant.

"She's powerful - like you said. But there are always limitations on power. For Alice, she can only foretell things about what she knows and has experienced. She's only ever been human then a vampire, so that's the extent of what she can see," Seth said, elaborating on his thoughts.

It was a logical conclusion. More so than anyone else had come up with. For a minute, no one said anything, each mulling the idea over.

"Well that's inconvenient!" Alice huffed, throwing her hands up.

"Looks like you lot have to stick around then," Emmett said, chuckling. "Alice always has an unfair advantage. It'd be nice to have things be a bit more even."

"Traitor," Alice hissed. Her genuine displeasure was tempered by anticipation. Interesting.

Jasper momentarily considered teasing her as well. But Mae was sleeping peacefully, and now was probably the last chance he'd get to steal her from Rose and Jake's ongoing battle of who got to hold her while she was awake.

Jasper approached Rose, and was pleasantly surprised when she handed the baby over without complaint.

* * *

Bella's heart rate had picked up. Soon it would stop altogether. Only a few more minutes now.

He'd been with her for a while now, talking to her, attempting to distract her from the pain and calm her fears. No one had done that for him, but he remembered wishing someone had cared enough not just to sit with him, but to try and help in whatever small way was possible.

He was still disappointed his gift had no impact on relieving her pain, but perhaps she'd remember the things he'd said as well as the unique way of conversing they'd been engaged in for the last six hours or so.

"I noticed you redecorated our room," he said, noticing Alice still bouncing in the doorway after reassuring Bella, excitement gushing forth like a tidal wave.

At first she didn't speak. For several minutes she just stood and watched Bella much like he was. "It wouldn't be right for us to continue sharing," she said simply, shrugging. As she came closer, she added, "I called Jay."

"Why?" Jasper asked, though he had a feeling he already knew.

"The divorce papers are ready to sign," Alice said, lightly touching his shoulder. "I know it's just a formality, but it seemed like the right thing to do. To make it official, and to give us some closure."

"If you're certain," Jasper said, watching Bella. He felt the tendrils of intrigue she released over hearing this information. It had been nearly ten minutes since she last reacted in a way that let him know she was aware of her surroundings. Then it had been a finger twitch, an increase of pain, and panic over Edward returning.

"I am." No hesitation. None. She was actually excited if he had to guess. He was unsettled by how all right he felt with the idea of officially divorcing Alice. Marriage had never been overly important to him, he'd done the ceremony for her sake. But he wasn't as sad as he'd expected to be now that it was truly over.

"And my things?" Jasper asked.

He'd gone in to change a couple hours ago only to find their shared room now belonging solely to Alice. The only belongings of his left was a single change of clothes, likely left in anticipation of that very moment.

"At the cottage," Alice said carefully.

"And the reason you moved everything there?"

Was Bella still going to be using the cottage? Jasper had assumed that it was to give her and Edward a separate space so the newlyweds could have some privacy since they'd probably be having sex all the time those first few years after her change. Edward wouldn't want others' thoughts distracting him during that. At least Jasper hoped he wouldn't. Not that it mattered anymore. The likelihood of Bella and Edward ever having sex again seemed highly unlikely. Nonexistent even.

"You'll be staying with Bella and Mae - to help protect them," Alice explained.

"From?" He didn't want to ask if he needed to protect Mae from Bella. She'd be a newborn and Mae had a heartbeat. He wished his thoughts hadn't turned in that direction first, but it would be foolish not to expect at least some trouble.

"Bella doesn't know how to fight, and Mae sleeps. She'll need help when not at the house," Alice said, brushing a hand over Bella's brow. That didn't explain why Bella would even still be using the cottage. Perhaps heartache over Edward would cause her to seek out isolation and distance from the family. It seemed unlikely, but Jasper could think of no other explanation. "Don't you want to help them?" Alice asked, cutting into his speculative analysis.

"Of course I do. But why don't they just stay at the main house where we can all help?"

Alice's eyes glazed over, testing the idea. Her unease was thick as molasses, sticking uncomfortably long before she'd returned to the present.

"That would be a little uncomfortable," she said primly, lips clamped tightly shut to form a thin line.

"Alice… "

She laughed at his frustration, amused that she alone knew what to expect. He used to find it an endearing quality. Now he thought Emmett might be right in calling her annoying. She stuck her tongue out at him as though she'd read his thoughts.

Bella's heart picked up, racing headlong to its final beat, trying to fit a lifetime's worth into the span of a few minutes.

"You're going to need to be the one that takes Bella on her first hunt," Alice informed him.

Jasper nodded. Alice had already hinted at it and he'd expected that given the fact he had the most experience managing newborns and helping them harness control. He'd been tasked with the care of over four thousand - closer to five - during his time with Maria.

Alice's sudden burst of delight snared his attention.

"Why do you find the idea of Bella's first hunt so amusing?"

"I can see her future again," Alice reminded him even as her eyes took on the glazed look he'd seen so many times he'd lost count.

"And?"

"She's nothing you've ever seen before," Alice said vaguely. When she caught his expression, she rolled her eyes, adding, "And she's going to absolutely blow your mind."

"I've seen my fair share of newborns," Jasper remarked dryly.

"Exactly."

"You aren't going to share any more are you?"

Alice reached for his hand, clasping it between both of hers. "Trust yourself. It's all real," she breathed, squeezing his fingers meaningfully.

"What is?"

"You won't do anything wrong," Alice said, hedging. She avoided questions and prompts with the expertise of a dodgeball player.

"Alice!"

She gasped. Bella's back had arched over a foot off the table, and her fingers had closed to tightly clenched fists.

"It's time," Alice chimed, jumping up and down once, and clapping excitedly.

* * *

This is the end of Part 1: Enigma.


	10. 10: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

I don't think I pulled anything directly from the book, but just in case - any dialogue you recognize is from _Twilight_, _New Moon_ or _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Part 2: Awakening

Falling in love with you was never my intention. But it became my addiction.

Anonymous

* * *

Chapter 10 - Bella

Awareness came at Bella with a vengeance. It was her punishment for wanting to become a vampire. Her selfish desire to be part of this life now meant that she had to endure the suffering of changing tenfold. There was no way her family had undergone such agony and remained functional. No one could endure the fires of hell and come out unscathed.

Surely that was where she was - hell. Flickering red flames danced across her useless eyelids, shrouding everything. They no longer worked, singed and burned as they'd been in the first moments.

Her body was nothing more than a withered husk. Bella idly wondered if her family was even now disposing of the useless, charred remains. There was no way she was coming back from such significant and extensive ruination.

The black abyss that had been her temporary sanctuary was out of reach. Bella searched for it, clawed and scratched her way there, dragging her mangled corpse behind, but the path back to the peace of nothing was nowhere to be found. She was blindly circling the elusive relief, stumbling through the dense forest without a compass, sun, or stars to guide her.

Fiery branding irons were drug slowly across her skin leaving trails of sizzling, blackened and burnt flesh in their wake. The dead tissue seemed to curl and flake off, revealing brand new skin ripe and ready for torment.

She'd thought she knew what to expect since she'd experienced James's bite - how utterly laughable. A mosquito bit. An irritant rash gone before it'd been properly scratched raw. That had been nothing. Nothing!

Her new reality was infinitely worse. And it had only just begun. Three days? She wasn't going to be able to hold out three more minutes!

There was no way of knowing how long she'd been numb to the pain before it had begun registering. No way of knowing how long of a reprieve she'd been granted. It hadn't been long enough. That was the only truth she was sure of.

Edward had tried to warn her about the pain. He'd said - No! He was the reason things had gone wrong. She would not think about him. Bella forcefully shoved all thoughts of him aside. Anything and everything that could potentially remind her of him was unwelcome.

That was rather difficult though, seeing as he'd come to be the center of her world. Almost from the first moment she saw him. She'd loved him before ever getting to know him. Everything she did and felt had involved him in some way. It was all based on her desperate desire to be with him. She'd let herself become so dependent on Edward that there was next to nothing left of her that was separate.

For a moment Bella forgot her own name. Then it happened again. And again. Long stretches of endless pain punctuated with moments of impossible lucidity where she recalled that this had been something she'd actively sought. Then her mind would rebel, desperate to escape the reality of her inflicting such torment on herself.

That was why this was happening? Right? She'd asked for it… A bargain of some sort…

Her mind was unable to cope with the events that had lead her here. It was too disorienting. But perhaps something important had happened… That sounded right. Didn't it?

Bella couldn't recall, though she wanted to. Some instinctive need for survival hinted that if she knew, it would help her hold on, because she could feel herself slipping.

Slipping away.

Slipping from the family she loved. Charlie, her father. Carlisle, her adoptive father - the one she'd be granted eternity with if she could just hang on.

Edward left her. He didn't want her. Without him, was there a reason she should even try to hold on? What was the point if she wasn't with him in the end? She wished she'd never met him. Without him, she wouldn't be suffering now.

He was at the center of this pain. She'd been holding on to him, for him. But now she had no reason to continue. He'd made that perfectly clear.

Her fingers loosened. Reality wavered. A sweaty grip not sufficient enough to grasp and cling to the only hold preventing her from plummeting to her ultimate, final death.

Blackness threatened. A black hole that beckoned temptingly. She'd wanted that, yet now she could see that if her tenuous grip on reality eased even a fraction more, she'd be lost forever. Her survival was still uncertain. She wanted to live. Bella hadn't fought this hard and this long to give up now. Someone still needed her even if Edward didn't.

Someone… Who?

She couldn't remember. There was a gaping emptiness where the knowledge should be. It was cold, dark, foreign.

Bella just had to hold on. Now she fought against the enclosing blackness. She'd have to try remembering again later. For now, she was a drowning person flailing for the surface, reaching for the precious oxygen that was so close, yet so far. Survival was her first priority. She had to hold on. Just hold on.

That had been her recent life, from what she could recall. Holding on. Chasing after the supernatural people in her life. Her friends… Jacob! Yes, she remembered her best friend. Jacob.

Jacob's smile and warmth - a warmth that seemed frozen compared to the flames currently slicing her from the inside out, flicking like a thousand tiny whips - usually made her happy. Jacob, for all his pushy and immature, thoughtless comments, never saw Bella as weak. Certainly not weak enough to give up right now. He was her friend. Her protector when she'd had no one else.

Why had she had no one else though? The knowledge was so close. She reached… and reached… searching. Pain erupted. A volcano exploding, releasing a pyroclastic flow. It bombarded her, steamrolling at four hundred miles per hour.

Edward had abandoned her in a forest after telling her she wasn't good enough for him.

No! She didn't want to remember that.

Think of Jacob. Her best friend. _Hold on to that memory_.

No matter how many times she had hurt Jacob, he kept coming back. Stubbornly trying to love her, though he shouldn't. She'd never love him back. Not romantically at least. She'd tried, but that essential spark just wasn't substantial enough to last. He would only ever be her best friend. And he was there for her when Edward abandoned her. He helped her survive the worst pain she'd known up to that point.

No. She couldn't think of how much Edward had hurt her. The idea of her physical pain competing with her emotional pain was too much to contemplate. It would surely consume her.

Thoughts raced through Bella's mind as she frantically searched for something positive to focus on, something that would help her hold on.

Then there was Alice. Her sister. Bella was going to be like her. Alice had seen it. All along she'd been convinced this would one day happen. Not that _he'd_ wanted it to happen. He'd never wanted her -

No. _Focus on Alice,_ Bella reminded herself. They'd have forever together. Though that might be difficult now if Edward -

Bella again cut the thought off with the sharpest mental scissors she possessed. She would not think of _him_. She could not. Not if she had any hope of coming through the fire she was finding more and more tempting to surrender to.

There had been one other time in her life that was full of pain and heartache where she'd had to teach herself not to let her mind wander where it would. She'd had plenty of practice not thinking about the one that hurt her - repeatedly.

Cutting the thought off also meant surrendering her mind. Her identity, so entwined with the one she longed to forget, meant forgetting herself. The memory of who she was disappeared. Her identity vanished.

She plunged into the crucible, surrendering to the fires intent on melting and forging her anew.

* * *

She came back slowly. Thoughts aside from pain gradually formed. Her mind became clearer. The feel of her heart pounding was a physical presence her senses were all too aware of. Was that normal?

There was something… Something about a promise to keep that heart beating. She concentrated on it, counting the beats and reassuring herself that she was continuing to keep the promise. It was important somehow, tied as it was to… What? A person? An event?

Her sharpening mind spun in useless, frantic circles. Blindfolded. Alone in the dark. Illiterate in the most elaborate and extensive library on the planet.

She was a detective without any clues or leads.

All the while there was pain. Blistering, searing heat scalding her. On and on it went.

That important something, the one tying her to life, still refused to come to mind. Try as she might, she could not recall the one thing she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt would give her the strength to survive this.

Just as she located the place in her brain that the memory was stored, she lost sight of it. It slipped away like water through grasping fingers. The creases formed gaping holes that let the liquid pass right through.

She forgot her own name again. Forgot where she was from. Who she loved. Where she was. Everything.

Only pain remained. The searing of being roasted on a spit over a bed of hot coals. The agony of spikes from an iron maiden slowly piercing her everywhere at once. The shock of a thousand bolts of lightning hitting her over and over.

The raging heat smothered her, scorching every inch of her charred body. A heavy, relentless weight pinned her in place making it impossible to move or scream. Internally, she burned, twisting in the flames, screaming herself hoarse. Externally, she lay immobile and silent, offering no clues to the anguish she experienced.

Then a face came to her. Loose, honey blond curls and golden eyes. Strong, broad shoulders. He was safety personified. There was relief from the sensations she was experiencing. He grounded her, centered her. Made it easier to compartmentalize the pain and breathe through it. She clung to the image and emotion, gripped the diamond hard cables connecting the two of them with her fingers, squeezed so tight she'd never be able to release her hold - not that she could ever imagine wanting to. Who was he?

Bella. She was Bella and the face belonged to Jasper. They'd never been close before. Edward - No! Edward was pain and betrayal. The thought stopped dead in its tracks, and her mind returned to Jasper, focusing on him as a distraction from the pain. Jasper was strength and faith. The two so undeniably different.

It was only recently that Bella had started getting to know Jasper. He was helping her with something. The important something that she needed to remember. Even now he was keeping his promise to her. His promise to…

_Renesmee_.

Her baby. The phantom presence had been the memory of her little nudger. Her perfect, beautiful little girl. The one she'd fought for. She had to keep fighting. For her. To return to her. To survive for her. Soon, though not soon enough, she'd get to see her daughter again. If only she could endure her current agony.

Her baby girl had smiled at her. She'd known Bella was her momma. Jasper had told her how much her daughter loved her. Had Renesmee seen and felt Bella's love for her in those too short moments when they met?

The raging fires amped up, fed by a constant fresh supply of fuel until the heat reached a new high. The ultimate pinnacle. It was harder to focus, sweat beaded and evaporated before it had a chance to slide over her skin and offer cooling relief.

If only she had more memories of Renesmee to occupy her mind and distract her from her ceaseless torment!

Memories…

Memories were difficult when all of her most important involved Edward, and she did _not_ want to remember him. Just thinking about him hurt worse than the pain of being burned alive.

There was something she needed to remember. Her own name, her identity fled once more when a lash of flame whipped her, leaving a searing, scalding lick of pain lancing through her. It was impossible to concentrate through it.

Wasn't a person not supposed to feel pain with a third degree burn - the one that went all the way through skin and down to the muscle? Something about damaged and destroyed sensory receptors… So why could she still feel _everything_? There was no way her burning had remained superficial!

* * *

Time passed, and she counted breathes - hers and the others in the house. She could keep track of all of it, each individual person. Her head was so large now. The distractions helped. With each breath she took, she attempted to push the pain to the back of her mind and try once more to remember who she was.

It came slowly. Her awareness of self.

A memory triggered her knowing. She was Bella. Her daughter was Renesmee. Her love for the child was an indelible brand on her heart. Jasper would protect her - with Rose's help. Alice, Emmett, Esme, and Carlisle would help him too.

"_If I don't make it - just hear me out - if I don't, please listen - Jasper, promise me that you'll always look after him."_

"_Him?"_

"_Just a hunch. Will you?"_

"_Even if the child is more like you than Edward? More human… you'd trust me with his safety? Even knowing my history, knowing how many I've killed, knowing I'm dangerous? Even knowing that I once tried to kill you, and would have if the family hadn't stopped me?"_

"_Always. I will always trust you with him. You'd do a better job than anyone else."_

"_Then I swear he'll always have it. Forever."_

Her baby was safe. Jasper had promised. Vowed it even. He always kept his word. He was honorable like that - unlike Edward. A southern gentleman to his core. She was right to trust him with her child's safety. He wouldn't let her down. Edward would not be able to hurt her baby before she was able to protect her herself.

But Bella had been wrong about one thing. It hadn't been a him. No, it was Renesmee. Her perfect daughter.

How could she have forgotten her for even a moment?

Alice hadn't remembered anything from before her change, and the others had all said it was very hard to remember anything. Except Rose. She'd wanted to remember. She'd loved her life, and was unwilling to let go of it, despite the agony eating away at her as she longed to still be part of that former life.

Rose had confessed to replaying the events that lead to her change over and over while her body transitioned. It allowed her to retain more from her human life. Significantly more than any of the others had. Bella had always privately thought that that stubbornness played a significant role in Rose's discontent and resentfulness about what she'd lost when becoming a vampire.

It wasn't the same for Bella though. She wasn't giving up anything she couldn't live without. Rather she was gaining everything she wanted. Her memories wouldn't inspire feelings of loss and bitterness. Instead, they were the stepping stones leading her on the path to eternal happiness. So Bella didn't want to forget her human life either. She wanted to keep those memories long after all of the people she'd loved had died, their bones disintegrated to nothing but ash and the writing on their tombstones had weathered smooth.

All of her memories - except the ones of Edward. She didn't want Rose's issues. She didn't want to live with regret or heartache or be the zombie she'd been after the first time he'd left her. Bella didn't want to remember the one that hurt her. The one that left a hole in her heart that she doubted could ever be filled. If she forgot him, she'd wake up whole after changing. A shiny new penny. It would be a fresh start, like hitting a reset button.

Bella was already so far in that it was hard to call up some events, but she started with her parents. There were unwanted trips to Forks to visit her dad that ended up with Bella reading while he watched a sports game more often than not. Planting vegetables that would never grow in a dusty, desert garden with her mom. Fishing trips spent playing with a set of dark-haired twins - their names eluded her, already burned away. Adventures in painting and cooking with her erratic mother. A rock climbing escapade when she was ten that ended with her mom rushing her to the hospital. A sub-par dinner at the lodge with her dad after graduating high school.

Once every memory she could conjure had been cemented into her altering brain, she did the same for her new parents. Carlisle stitching her up and discussing his views on the eternal soul during her last birthday. Talking to Esme while she made brunch the first time Bella had ever stayed over. Getting Carlisle's first-hand help for a paper on the War of 1812 since he'd come to America only a few years before it began. Esme supporting Bella's decision to have Renesmee even though it went against Carlisle's wishes.

All the while the heat burning her to cinders turned up. It steadily, relentlessly increased.

Except when it doubled.

She knew the moment the damage to her spine had been repaired. Bones, tendons, cartilage, ligaments, and nerves altered by the venom became whole once more allowing pain signals from her legs to reach her brain - how wonderful.

The torture, once concentrated only in her upper body, was suddenly everywhere. This trial to test her worthiness to become a vampire had turned more sadistic than ever. The definition of pain was being constantly redefined.

She would not last. She was unworthy. Only an insane person would ever willingly choose to go through this! No wonder the Cullens had always thought her decisions odd.

New levels hell. She'd definitely descended to all new levels. Wasn't the ninth circle supposed to be covered in ice? Surely she'd descended far even to reach the depths Dante had described. Bella longed for it. The cool relief of that icy plain must be close. She couldn't take much more.

Broken bones - arms, legs and ribs - lacerations, skull fractures, drowning. Bella had experienced it all. But none of it compared. Even the hollow, aching emptiness that followed Edward's leaving -

Nothing. She forgot herself again. A rope tying her past to present was severed so abruptly that she fell, plummeting into the blazing, violent chasm of her burning body.

Her hands reached and scrambled to find purchase. Searching to snag hold of some minute detail that would save her and steer her back, away from the endless pain and towards her awaiting future. Embers scattered as she crashed, surrounding her, dancing merrily like flickering fireflies as she was consumed.

The blistering fire in her chest blazed hotter, centered at her heart. It reverberated through her with the echoing power of a lion's roar.

Hotter. Hotter. Hotter still.

The infinite inferno burned.

She would not survive this. No one could. If only -

"_Jazz, prom… ise."_

"_I know. I will. Hang in there, Bella. You'll see her again in a couple days."_

Renesmee. Her baby. She was Bella, and Jasper was protecting Renesmee through this change. She had to hang onto that memory. She would survive this - for her daughter's sake.

The moment her jaw unclenched, she clamped it shut and ground her teeth, wishing for the vanished gag. The morphine was gone, its oppressive weight dissipating. The knowledge that she could finally scream, beg for help, plead for death if she chose was not welcome. Rosalie had already warned it wouldn't do any good, that there was no point to screeching and hollering.

More than that, though, was the realization that her innocent baby was somewhere in the house. It would be traumatizing for her to hear her mother's endless screaming. And it was certain to be just that - endless. Bella knew that if she started, her throat would be raw, her vocal cords strained beyond repair if she started because there would be no stopping once the first cry passed her lips. Bella would not put Renesmee through that. She would remain in control.

Renesmee was the most important thing in her life. She remembered all of the precious few moments she'd spent with her. The tiny life she'd carried and longed to demand be returned to her.

Bella wanted to remember everything paramount in her life. That's what she'd been doing before she'd lost herself - remembering.

There were people important to her that she needed to think about, friends from school, the pack, and most importantly, her new family. The memories were dredged up from the depths of her barely lucid mind. There were fewer than before and it was noticeably more difficult to recall clearly. Impressions. That's all they really were at this point. Vague impressions that had already been sandblasted and weathered so thoroughly that the majority of details were missing.

Still she tried anyway.

There was Alice forcing Bella to let her paint her toenails. Emmett teasing her when she tripped on the stairs. Rosalie caring for her through her pregnancy. Jasper telling her she was worth it after his family finalized plans to protect her, uprooting their lives to do so. Jacob teaching her to ride a motorcycle then taking her to the hospital when she banged her head open. Addressing envelopes with Angela just before graduation. Sitting around a bonfire surrounded by giant Quileutes as their tribal legends were shared. Alice returning to Forks, worried that she'd find Bella dead. Jasper telling her about the guilt he felt over the humans he'd killed.

On and on. Faster and faster. More and more memories flooded her brain, crystallizing into the new impenetrable structure.

All thoughts of Edward were immediately shut down followed by a quick reprimand. He represented pain and the constricting prevention of all of her dreams and everything she held dear. She did not want to remember him or lose herself as he always seemed to make her do.

It made remembering her new family more challenging. Things were taken out of context, skewed until they made little sense. Especially considering how hard it already was to remember anything at all. But Bella was satisfied with how much she felt certain she'd managed to hold onto. Even if they turned out dim and murky, she'd recall the love she felt for these people.

* * *

More time passed. Ages. Eons. Millenia. Decades. It had no meaning and she had no way to tell how much.

Without the morphine she knew she could move, but knew that doing so would be a very bad idea. She had to resist. If she moved even a fraction, her fragile composure would be obliterated. She'd fall to pieces.

She longed for the blackness she'd first fought against, the promise of empty oblivion, but it was far too late for that. She was too far in.

All the while, her mind continued expanding. It shifted and grew, allowing her more room to process information. It was easier than ever to think even as it became harder to remember. Soon there was infinite space inside her head. Enough room to feel the agony of changing on a whole new level - in surround sound, technicolor, the works - and take in more of what was happening in the house. Sounds were louder, clearer. Scents stronger, more distinct.

Someone downstairs was eating a ham and cheese omelet while someone in the next room was aimlessly flipping through channels on the television, only waiting two seconds before moving on to the next.

The new information lingered too, catalogued in a database to remain forever accessible. It would take no effort to recall either, even a century - or ten - from now. Her mind wanted to take in all it could. Anything to distract her.

Distractions… Someone had once told her how easily vampires were distracted. It was no wonder given how much she could take in and separate out into their most basic components. Who'd said that? Had it been Edward that first told her?

Edward… he was another Cullen. Right? He'd been important to her, somehow… Hadn't he?

She'd already shied away from remembering Edward for so long it was nearly impossible to drag up any memories at all when she tried. To determine if it had been him to mention distractions or not. Only a few things he'd ever said came to mind with genuine clarity.

"_It's like me - nothing but a murderous monster!" _

The person she didn't want to remember was a monster? Why did she even know him then? Why was he a part of her life?

Frustrated and confused, Bella tried to make sense of another thing she remembered Edward saying.

"_If that - thing - kills you, I swear I will kill it."_

Somehow she knew he was referring to Renesmee. Her child… and his. He'd said such an awful thing about his daughter?

Wait… That was the father of her child? Why had she ever been with him to have a child in the first place? It didn't make sense. Bella tried and failed to remember the circumstances that lead to Renesmee's conception. Those details were completely lost to her, an empty vacuum where memories should be. She'd have to settle for asking Alice or Jasper once she managed to survive her current misery.

The only other information she could remember about him was the pain he inflicted from his many broken promises.

"_Bella, I don't want you to come with me."_

In Phoenix he'd promised to stay. She remembered his saying, "_I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here as long as you need me."_

But he didn't.

She'd begged, "_Don't leave me._"

He'd promised, "_I won't._"

"_You… don't… want me?" _she'd asked upon learned the family planned to move from Forks.

And he'd replied, "_No." _

He'd been up front with her. It was her fault for forcing the issue when he'd already told her how he felt. No wonder it was so easy for him to keep leaving. She shouldn't be surprised that he regretted Renesmee if that was how he felt.

Bella might not understand how Renesmee came to exist given what she remembered, but it made sense that he didn't want to be part of her life. Somehow that was all right. He didn't have to. Bella didn't need him. There was so much else to look forward to. Others she loved that also loved her. The future would still be glorious!

New steps entered the room, strong and deliberate. They approached her side, moving to stand beside her head. Bella heard the slow even breaths and… a hummingbird's wings? No that wasn't right. The sound was too wet. It thumped and sloshed almost like it was - it was a heartbeat! A very, very fast heartbeat. Was that how they all sounded? How distracting school must be to hear that all the time!

Fingers smoothed across her forehead, sliding down to cup her cheek. Instinctively, Bella knew they belonged to a vampire, but they were soft and there wasn't even a hint of coolness to the touch. Already she was becoming like the person gently touching her.

The new presence made it easier to concentrate on her surroundings instead of the raging flames. It was still there. Still excruciating. But no longer the sole, or even primary, focus of her existence.

Another, lighter, set of footsteps approached. The new person nearly skipped as they came into the room only to stop two feet to the right of the first person. Bella was amazed with the sheer amount of detail she could detect without once opening her eyes.

The hand cradling her cheek retracted quickly, as though afraid of getting caught with her. Instantly, Bella missed the tender touch. The contrast between it and the pain of burning was too enormous to quantify.

"Should she be in here?" Alice's tinkling, bell voice asked. The musical quality was crystal clear. Bella could hear individual notes and melodies within it for the first time. The lighter steps must have belonged to Alice.

"She's asleep." Jasper. That was Jasper's deep tenor. The southern drawl more pronounced now that she was hyper aware of her surroundings. His voice was a soothing balm on the fire ant stinging buzzing through her. "Besides, if Bella hasn't screamed yet, she's not going to. Such control - I've never seen the like."

"It'll carry over into her new life," Alice said knowingly.

"You think so?"

"I've seen it. Don't you remember what I said about her first hunt?"

"No. You haven't mentioned it yet," Jasper said gently, almost as if he was trying to avoid hurting her feelings as he carefully reminded Alice that just because she'd seen herself sharing, didn't mean she actually had.

"That's right. I decided I didn't want to spoil the surprise just yet," Alice chimed, laughter and delight shining through.

"I wonder if it's the morphine's influence or just her?" Jasper pondered, letting the mention of Bella's first hunt drop.

Internally, Bella raged. She wanted to know what would happen on her first hunt! Who cares about why she wasn't screaming her head off? Bella already knew the answer to that question, so it held little interest to her as far as conversations went. Why would Alice even mention her hunting though if it wasn't important? Why wasn't Jasper demanding an explanation on her behalf? Were they actively _trying_ to drive her insane? Didn't they understand she _needed_ the diversion?

"It's been suggested that Jane and Alec's gifts manifested as they did because of how they viewed the change. Their impressions and desires shaped the skills they developed. The morphine may be doing the same for Bella," Carlisle's voice sounded. Bella could tell he was speaking from downstairs.

He always weighed in on intellectual debates among the family. It was a small detail Bella was glad she remembered about her new father. It brought to mind the discussion of Renesmee potentially being similar to Jacob in her chromosomal count a few days ago. The thought of Renesmee centered her, diverting her mind from the pain.

Then there was the notion that she may be gifted. How extraordinary that would be! Proof that she belonged in this life. Vindication for her persistence that she should be made one of them.

"The morphine… " Alice began, a question implicit in the mention.

"I don't think it worked. I still felt - she's suffering every bit as much as we did," Jasper said.

Bella felt a hand rest on her arm. Again, the pressure was there, but there was no noticeable cooless. How strange. She longed for the numbing relief the touch should have brought. How impossible. Honestly, everything should feel cool compared to the heat she was inflamed in. Perhaps the venom's fire was so extreme it obliterated the very memory of cold and made it impossible for anything to ever feel cool again.

"It's all gone now. But she hasn't… " Alice said, coming closer. Bella could actually hear the displaced air the movement caused along with the rustle of fabric - silk sliding against cotton only to catch slightly as the skirt swished.

"She's strong," Jasper said. Bella felt immeasurable pride at hearing him praise her for a quality no one else had ever believed she possessed before.

"She will be," Alice agreed.

"She already is," Jasper clarified. "Look at all she's faced, and never once flinched." There was a long pause after Jasper spoke. His words pierced Bella's soul. She'd never seen it herself, but she trusted Jazz, and liked that he viewed her that way. He was once again telling her she was worth it. That she was worthy. "I think it's safe to assume she is willing herself not to react to the venom. Much like you did, Carlisle."

"Remarkable. I had to - if I wanted to survive. She is doing it by choice. Perhaps she really will be yet another gifted family member, and her choices now will be the determining factor in what she can do," Carlisle said.

"If that's the case, I will be very interested in the outcome. Others likely will be too," Jazz warned.

"I haven't seen anything in particular, but that's hardly surprising given she doesn't know herself yet," Alice said.

"We'll know soon enough," Carlisle said.

"Only six more hours," Alice confirmed.

_Six_? It was fewer than she'd thought, but more than she felt confident facing. At least she now knew the amount was finite. It was a small mercy.

"Yes. It won't be too much longer. Hang in there, Bella. You're doing wonderful. Renesmee is right here waiting for you. Hang in there for her sake," Jasper encouraged. The hand on her arm exerted the slightest pressure. Bella felt determination well within her, surging through her clenched muscles. "Hmmm. Good, keep it up."

"Do you remember how awful this part is?" Alice asked.

"Yes. So confusing and painful," Jasper said, increasing the pressure on her arm. Footsteps approached, heavy and… energetic.

"Can you lessen it with your gift?" Emmett asked hopefully from six and a half feet away. Bella guessed he was still in the doorway. "Or do something to help her?"

"No. I've tried before, and I tried on Bella when I first came in yesterday. It doesn't work against the burn of changing."

"Do you think she can hear us?" Emmett asked.

"Probably," Jasper said meaningfully. "Her emotions are clearer now than they were an hour ago, and she reacted when I mentioned Mae."

Mae? Jazz hadn't mentioned anyone named Mae.

"You should talk to her. Distract her. Remind her what's waiting for her after," Alice suggested.

Bella heard the light retreating steps, along with Emmett's heavier, bouncing ones, and the closer steady breaths. They were easier to focus on than anything else. She started counting them, using them to measure the passing time. How many times would a person breathe in six hours? Six thousand or so? _More_? She was at fifty-six when he spoke, and the words were even easier to concentrate on than his breathing had been.

"You did so well. I doubt anyone could have done a better job," Jasper began, leaning close to whisper in her ear almost shyly, as though confessing a secret. "She's here. I'm holding her now - your reason to keep fighting. Mae is sleeping -"

There was that name again. Who was he talking about? Bella wanted to hear about her daughter, not Mae. Why would she care about someone she'd never met? Though the mystery was rather engrossing. A wonderful enigma.

"You're… curious. I almost missed it masked in with the pain, but I've gotten so much better at reading you." Yes, yes. That was all well and good, but who was Mae? "Ah, and now you're impatient that I explain. Renesmee. I hope you don't mind. I've taken to calling her Mae. I'd forgotten, but your daughter's name reminded me. I had a little sister - before I was turned. She was only eight when I left for war. Her name was Margaret, but we all called her Mae. It's a good southern name for the perfect mix between a lady and a little spitfire. I'm certain that's what she'll be."

Mae. It was… pretty. Mae - May. Like spring flowers or roses - like Rose. The name was short and sweet. Adorable. Fitting.

Bella loved that her daughter's full name represented both halves of her child - vampire and human, mother and father. Now she also had a nickname that represented Jasper's past and reminded her of Rosalie. Jasper and Rose, her daughter's staunchest defenders. Renesmee's heritage was well represented.

"Besides, it means pearl, and she already has perfect little pearly white teeth," Jazz added.

Mae had teeth? Why?

Jasper chuckled, squeezing her arm again. He must have picked up on her confusion.

"She's part vampire, Bella. She needs teeth to feed," he explained. "Though we've been giving her bottles, those are a relatively new invention and evolution probably didn't account for them when providing her with the means to eat as a newborn."

It seemed logical enough, though Bella wondered how odd it must seem to a doctor like Carlisle for an infant to have a full set of teeth. Was there anything else unusual about her? How was she doing? If only Bella could open her eyes and see for herself!

Hearing more about her daughter would be nearly as satisfying. She willed Jasper to feel her desire, and was pleasantly surprised when it seemed to work, almost as though they were still able to converse despite her need to keep her teeth clenched to lock in her screams.

"Mae is doing wonderfully. Eating, sleeping - completely healthy. She's gifted too. You'll have to wait to find out how for yourself. Carlisle doesn't think it will work on you, but we'll see," Jasper said.

Gifted? Really? Of course her daughter was special, but learning that she was also gifted was exciting. What was it though? Why wouldn't he just tell her?

"Patience, Bella. It's better to experience than hear about. I think Mae will enjoy being the one to share it with you," Jasper explained.

When he put it that way, how could she be angry?

"Carlisle also says you're going to be fine too, no lasting damage from the birth or your broken spine. Alice confirmed it," Jasper said.

Bella could care less about herself just then. It was only the news of her daughter keeping her in the present. But when Jasper switched topics, the anguish of the burn overtook her. She was awash in a furnace of magma where no words could penetrate the molten rock she was drowning in.

* * *

"Hanging in there? Your emotions have settled a bit," Jazz whispered, tentatively touching her face with just the tips of his fingers, the pad of his thumb moving softly over the arch of her cheekbone.

He was still sitting with her? How much time had passed?

This wasn't the first time she'd been aware enough to listen to him since he first started talking to her, but this was definitely the most lucid one yet. Each time she'd fought back the melting, charring sensation Jasper had been waiting. The moment he picked up on her emotions he'd begun talking to her, telling stories, updating her on Renesmee, or reading to her from one of her favorite classics. Anything to help her through this horrendous process.

"Mae is downstairs. Do you hear her?"

Faint slurping and sucking sounds drifted up accompanied by the hummingbird quick thrumming of her heart. So fast. Too fast? She'd have to ask once her jaw unstuck - if it even would after being clamped shut for so long.

"Rosalie is feeding her. Jacob wanted to, but she won this round," Jasper said, amusement clear in his drawl.

Why would Jacob want to feed her daughter? He'd been less than thrilled about her existence from the beginning.

"Yes… that situation -"

"Don't tell her - you promised!" The yell had come from downstairs, and had Jasper laughing full out. The deep rumble was captivating and brilliant, filling the room. But had that been Jake hollering? What did he not want Jasper to tell her about?

"I can't wait for him to explain all about that - I promised I wouldn't spoil the surprise, so you'll just have to wait to hear about it. Anyways, I thought it best they not feed her in here," Jasper said, and Bella could hear the smile still lingering in his voice.

Honestly, she'd rather have her daughter close. Annoyance swamped her, quick as an asp its fangs pierced her, sending frustrated venom coursing through her.

"Hmm. You're farther along in your transition than normal. I don't want the blood to agitate you more than necessary so she needs to be fed downstairs. Alice doesn't think it should be too much longer - a couple hours, less than one now actually."

A large hand encompassed her own, swallowing and dwarfing it. A rough callous scraped her palm as the fingers curled around hers. Wasn't becoming a vampire supposed to eliminate all imperfections from the body? How did Jasper still have a callous? Not that it really felt wrong, just strange. Her memories all revealed vampires with skin of perfectly polished marble. The idea of it not being true was fascinating, like being let in on a secret she'd longed to know.

"Would you like to know what else has happened while you've been preoccupied? I think you'll remember if I tell you now."

Yes! Being here yet isolated and unable to engage was tormenting in its own unique way entirely separate from the agonies of the change.

"I'm not sure how much you remember from Mae's birth… "

Disaster. It had been a disaster. Definitely not Carlisle's well thought out and safely devised plan.

"Yes. Things went awry. But I wanted to tell you, one thing went according to plan. It wasn't just Carlisle that turned you," Jasper said, speaking softer, his fingers moving idly over the back of Bella's hand. What was he talking about? "We all did," he finished.

How was that possible? Bella could only remember Carlisle biting her. Had the others come in as well when she'd been incoherent and on the brink of death? How had they managed it?

"Alice had the idea for each of us to put our venom into a syringe to inject you with. Carlisle, Esme, Em, Rose, Alice and I all did it. That way we'd all have a hand in your turning, and you'd be connected to each of us just the way you wanted," Jasper explained.

Love bubbled up, overflowing like a raging river bursting through a dam. Joy and wonder filled her, so prominent that it momentarily blocked the pain of transitioning. Bella could hardly believe they'd done that for her. Her family wanted to keep her forever, and had made sure she knew it on a fundamental level. On a cellular level even. It was exactly what she needed to know she belonged here, that her experiences were all worth it to get to this point. She could easily ride out this last hour in the volcano on the high this knowledge gave her.

"We want you in the family. All of us do. Never doubt it, Bella."

Bella's fingers twitched at hearing that. They moved spastically against Jasper's. It took four seconds for her to recognize and process the latest change that had occurred in her body. Her fingers were just fingers again. The burn had faded at long last from the digits.

It was somewhat shocking to discover that her hand still functioned. That it wasn't the blisters, bones, and scars that it had felt like after being set ablaze for so long. That there was something more substantial than brittle charcoal attached to her flaming wrist.

There was a new, untapped strength in her fingers too. Her muscles were eager to demonstrate their newfound abilities.

"Bella? You all right, darlin'?" Jazz asked, tightening his grip as though trying to ground her or lend her support. "It's almost over," he promised.

The warning made it abundantly clear he was correct. Because with it came the dry, sandpaper scratching sensation in her throat that had her compulsively swallowing. It was a useless action. The fires had burned her salivary glands to ash. There was nothing left to produce the refreshing, lubricating fluids her parched throat cried out for. So this was what Jasper had meant when he'd described the lure of blood for vampires. It lacked the intensity the rest of her body was experiencing, but it was by no means comfortable either. A shallow, sensory memory.

"Also," Jasper continued, trying once more to distract her, "Jacob convinced Sam that you and Renesmee aren't threats, and that he approved your transition without it violating the treaty. No one is going to attack Mae. So there's nothing to worry about there."

Relief at her daughter's safety was overshadowed by the newest tortures her body was enduring. Her heart! Bella's teeth clenched tighter, grinding loudly as the fire burned hotter in her heart. All of the flames receding from her limbs were draining into her heart. It was a swirling vortex collecting the hellfire inward to clash with the battery fueling her life. Except the single organ couldn't hope to withstand the latest assault.

"Speaking of updates… " Esme began from downstairs where Bella assumed the rest of the family waited. "Should someone call Edward or make him come home now?"

The name sparked one additional memory of a time when Bella had been downstairs with the family as well. One of a boyish, bronze-haired vampire shoving her into a table covered in fancy, glass plates. Breakable plates that shattered on impact, slicing her arm. Bella didn't remember anything else, just that Edward had hurt her for some reason.

If he'd hurt her like that, what would he do to Mae - the one he called a monster? Would he actually try something or was her current pain influencing her unjustly?

Confusion.

Dread.

Uncertainty.

Bella knew the memory was incomplete. There was a huge disconnect between the name Edward and her understanding of who he was. She knew from what little she could remember that Edward was rather aloof about most things, and likely didn't care enough to seek them out or agree to come here. A tiny voice in her head also pointed out that he probably hadn't intentionally hurt her that other time - the Cullens wouldn't stand for that. But regardless of that, he had.

The new chaotic emotions knifed up the frantic racing of her burning heart. There was no fire left below her knees or beyond her elbows. It was all concentrated in her heart, amplified by her alarm for her daughter, her likely irrational fear of Edward.

"Mae is safe. No one will harm her," Jasper swore, allowing Bella to breathe through the pain as it inched closer and closer to her torso. Bella believed him, knew Mae was safe with him guarding her, but it barely took the edge off of her irrational terror.

Dancing steps stopped at the entrance to the room. An exasperated sigh escaped the newcomer. The steps had been familiar enough that Bella realized Alice was there. With her gift, she'd know for sure that Renesmee was safe.

"Jasper is right. No one would dream of hurting Mae, and Edward has no intention of coming here anytime soon. It will be a long time before he can forgive himself for what happened. Relax, Bella," Alice said.

It was precisely what Bella needed to hear. Edward was no longer part of her life. She was free to forget him, to close that chapter of her life.

Then she was once more consumed by the changes happening within her. It took all of Bella's formidable, stubborn will to continue breathing through the fire blazing brighter in her heart and keep her limbs locked in place.

"The divorce papers are ready to sign. I know it's just a formality, but it seemed like the right thing to do. To make it official, and to give us some closure," Alice said.

Was Bella _married_ to Edward? That didn't feel like something she'd do. At least Alice was helping her rectify the situation. Great. She was a cliche! Divorced, eighteen-year-old single mother. Everything her mother had raised her not to be.

Bella's heart beat impossibly faster, straining against her lungs as it expanded and contracted at breakneck speeds. A jack-hammer couldn't even keep pace at this rate.

The fire was at her hips and shoulders now. The majority of her arms and legs were blessedly cool even as the blaze tore through her center, plummeting like a roller coaster.

"Alice!" Jasper called exasperatedly. Bella barely heard it over the sound of her own heart. It was nearly one continuous beat now.

Alice gasped as Bella felt her back bow, yanked upward as her heart tried to escape the protective cage containing it. With effort, Bella balled her fists, trying to hold herself in place.

"It's time," Alice chimed, jumping up and down once, and clapping excitedly.

"Her heart," Jasper breathed.

"Ah," Carlisle said, moving into the room. "It's almost over."

"Soon," Alice agreed. The heat was only in Bella's torso now. Soon, Alice had said. It'd have to be. Blood surging through her heart at this accelerated velocity was bound to punch right through if it didn't stop soon. "I'll get the others. Should I have Jake and Rosalie… "

"Yes. Bella has to hunt before meeting Mae," Jasper said quickly. What? No! Bella wanted her daughter! He must have felt her displeasure, because he said, "It'll be easier for you to not risk harming her if you've already fed. She's half you - half _human_. Her heart beats and your new instincts will likely have you viewing her as food."

Jasper's explanation made sense, but Bella didn't like it. He knew best though. She would never consider risking her daughter.

"I'll bring them right up. We'll wait in the hall until you've had a chance to assess her mood," Alice said.

A straw sucked the last of the fire into Bella's heart. The competition to determine the victor - inferno or galloping heart - was nearing its conclusion. The finish line was in sight. The two forces sprinted on. Inward. Into her heart.

"Probably for the best. Esme and Emmett were both fairly aggressive when they first woke. It's all so new," Carlisle agreed.

"Yes," Jasper said. "Even if she does have control. I don't think we should overwhelm her or take unnecessary chances. I can handle her."

The two retreated, darting from the room, and leaving Jasper behind just as Bella's heart stuttered out its final beat. The hollow thud echoed in the new silence.

It was too silent. No more talking. No more heartbeat. No more breathing.

Except it wasn't silent. Not really.

A squirrel was climbing a tree thirty-three feet from the house. It's tiny, clawed toes scraping the bark as it scurried upwards. Lights buzzed, a dim humming that filled the air, each one distinct and coming from a different room in the house. The river gurgled, dripping and laughing as it flowed over rocks only to cascade down, splashing and popping bubbles then turning a bit before winding onward. Wasn't that over a mile away?

There was no more pain either. How was it possible for the pain to just vanish? How was that not the first thing she noticed? It was entirely absent, not even a trace remained. Startling. Mysterious. _Wonderful_!

Strength and vitality surged through Bella. Boundless energy crackled and sizzled within her, seeking an outlet. Each muscle and sinew glowed. She felt invincible.

Finally. Finally she was strong. Strong like her family. Immortal like her family. She could keep up with them now.

Bella could feel and appreciate everything. It was all so exciting.

Then she opened her eyes and the dazzling newness and fullness amazed her. Never before had she truly seen. Her broken eyes had been repaired. She'd never even realized how ineffectual they'd been until they worked properly.

There was so much to take in. Bella didn't know what to focus on first, yet her mind was capable of processing it all at once. Even as her eyes tracked the floating grey dust motes, their shapes spinning and twisting like lopsided snowflakes, her ears continued listening to the wind parting as it hit the house and split to blow around the sides of the solid structure.

The dust shifted in front of a light and Bella became entranced by the colors. Little rainbows formed the white light, pulsing and issuing from the filaments inside the light bulbs. The colors were nearly tangible. And what was the eighth color? She had no name for it, but it was there. Never before had she seen it.

Another realization occurred to her. She wasn't breathing. How peculiar that she didn't need to anymore. Would doing so be like her other senses - magnified?

The answer was a single word - yes.

Inhaling was a singular experience in itself. Each molecule of air danced and spun around the others, racing to see which could soar down her throat the fastest. Bella could feel them traveling towards her lungs and forcing the organ to expand. Yet there was no relief associated with the action. She hadn't been experiencing symptoms of oxygen deprivation, so breathing did not alleviate lightheadedness or soothe any aches.

Experimentally, she inhaled again. It was the same. Habit, not necessity.

Despite that, she found herself wanting to continue doing it. The air tasted… like sweetened pecans? Or flowers? Acrid and chemical? Bella couldn't decide. It was such a strange, elusive mixture. Dozens of components mingled in the air around her.

Curiosity had her sniffing, attempting to interpret the evasive odors flavoring the air. Magnolias. That was the sweet flower she'd breathed. Bella could almost remember visiting a botanical garden in Phoenix that had magnolia trees. They weren't common to Arizona, not like they were in the south, but there had been a couple trees dotted with the enormous, vibrant white blooms each year. The exotic scent was beautiful. She inhaled deeper, filling her lungs with the heavenly fragrance.

There were other, fainter, notes in the air too. Copper and the harsh bite of chemicals were rather prominent. Underlying that, as though they were floating in from further away, was the scent of pine, vanilla, pears, cinnamon, leather, apple, mud, chocolate, incense, bread, hyacinth, musk, sweat, moss, sandalwood, seawater, wet dog, lavender. There were so many layers that she couldn't hope to separate them all. Not to mention a dozen other smells she didn't yet have a name for.

Bella found herself returning to the first scents she'd encountered. Magnolia and candied pecans. It was tempting. Intriguing. Entrancing. She greedily gulped it down, drawing in more of it deliberately. The aroma blanketed her, buffering her in the welcome warmth of home.

A tiny curling fuzz drifted passed her eyes, snagging her attention. Effortlessly sitting up, Bella followed its progress through the air, captivated with the way it flowed on the unseen air currents. Her eyes had improved to the point that she could distinguish the reddish-orange tint to the miniscule cotton fiber.

It took several minutes before Bella realized she was not alone. A lone figure stood just beside the table she was sitting on. A waving lock of gilded hair draped across his forehead and tangled in his long, sooty eyelashes. Gilded. His hair was a riot of whites and yellows, golds and silvers. It was the color of straw - no, corn… or maybe honey. Only more metallic. It was beautiful. Bella could imagine the way the sun would spark off it.

He stood frozen, watching her intently. Somehow she knew that the rest of the world had ceased to exist for him. It was only her. His eyes were a warm rolling carmel color with flecks of milk chocolate. Waves and starbursts patterned the intricate design. Acceptance and amusement shone from their depths. There was interest too. Not to mention a fair amount of anticipation.

It was him. Her protector. Bella gasped as she took him in. His strong stance, and toned body were visible even through his clothes. The seams at his shoulders pulled slightly. Bella saw a thread tugging at the top of his left shoulder.

He was home. Safety. Happiness. The emotions beckoned to her, tugging her to him. She was a magnet caught in his pull. The desire to be closer had her standing in front of him without consciously deciding to move.

She blinked, bewildered by her own ability to move. Her limbs flowed immediately and without direct effort. Never had she been able to get about without stumbling and purposefully planting her feet where they needed to go. She remembered being clumsy. It was one of the many banes of her existence. Apparently it wasn't to be part of her new life.

The realization played out in a corner of her mind, but mostly she continued staring at the man gravity had drawn her to. At the same time it took in other scents, sounds, and things in the distance.

Someone downstairs had just sat down - more like plopped. The person was heavy and graceless the way all teenage boys were. Jacob. It must have been Jacob. Bella could picture him thumping onto the sofa, sprawling limbs thrown wide to haplessly land wherever they willed.

A bird tweeted outside. It dropped to a lower branch and hopped twice before chirping another shrill cry.

Amazement at all the detail bombarding her wasn't enough to deter Bella from the imposing blond standing eight inches in front of her.

He wasn't smiling, but he was still gorgeous. Bella knew instinctively he'd be devastating to her senses if he ever did.

Jasper. The name popped into her mind abruptly. Yes. That was who this was. He could sense emotions, and had very likely just picked up on the way she'd been admiring him. He'd been the one sitting with her these last two days even though it must have pained him. He'd felt the echoes of her transition and chosen to stay with her regardless.

"Bella?" he breathed, uncertainty wafting from him like the aroma of fresh baked cookies straight out of the oven.

She felt guilty at once. He sounded so confused when he said her name.

"Do you know who I am?" he asked hesitantly, then added, "Do you remember me, darlin'?"

"Jazz," Bella replied, nodding only to stop as she listened to the bells that rang through the air. Wait, not bells… her voice. Her voice was beautiful! She couldn't wait to hear it again.

Bella wanted to test her altered voice, ensure she'd heard it correctly, but Jasper was speaking. His words stroked her senses like chinchilla fur. They were a tractor beam, trapping and demanding her entire focus.

"How are you doing? Would you like to see the rest of the family or do you need to hunt first?"

The thought of blood made Bella's throat itch uncomfortably, but it wasn't the mindless insanity she remembered the newborn from the clearing demonstrating after the battle with Victoria. She could still think rationally and ignore the rough dryness if she chose. That was… unexpected. Should it be so easy to push aside? She'd have to ask later.

"Family. I want to see our family," Bella said eagerly, cocking her head as she listened to the echoing chimes ringing from her.

Our family… she was truly one of them now. Happiness was a glowing light resonating from her soul.

"Seth, I think you should wait downstairs with Jacob. Bella might -" Carlisle began warningly.

"I'm only about ten feet away. If she thought I was dinner, wouldn't she have already raced out here?" Seth countered.

Bella looked to the door where she could hear her family gathered out in the hall. She tensed, worried that Carlisle was right. Would she attack Seth?

"Possibly," Carlisle conceded, then added, "but this time can be very disorienting. She may not have noticed you yet. Or the fact that you're a werewolf might make her defensive."

"I'm Seth. Not just any werewolf. She knows me," Seth said, sounding a little hurt. "I want to see her - I've been worried about her after… "

The two continued debating in the hall, but Bella ignored them in favor of taking stock of herself. She did not want to hurt Seth. He was her friend. She still remembered him helping save her life, remembered him being the one that presented Renesmee to her in those final chaotic moments before she'd lost herself to the change. The memory of her daughter was tied to him. She'd never forget that.

Jasper was keenly studying her, ready to restrain her if she lunged for the door and the source of the wet sloshing sound she now detected. The knowledge that Jasper would stop her if necessary gave her the courage to taste the air again and specifically identify the Quileute standing just outside the open doorway.

Her nose wrinkled immediately, and she shuddered a bit in distaste. It smelled like muddy incense. Dirty, wet sandalwood all smoky and musky. The stench was enough to drown out the sound of the wolf's heavy, slowly beating heart. Jasper chuckled at her reaction and relaxed.

"He's safe from her trying to feed on him," Jasper called, though he remained only inches away, eyes continuing to survey her reactions as everyone entered.

Bella felt no inclination to attack. These were people she loved. Her mind tamped down on her new instinct to view everything as a potential threat.

They were almost all there. Carlisle and Esme, Alice and Emmett, even Seth. Only Charlie and Renee were missing, and they'd never be a part of her life again. That was all right though. She'd already put enough distance between herself and her mom for this to not hurt her too badly. And Charlie had only been in her life on a regular basis for less than two years. He'd be able to adjust and get back to how things were without too much trouble - she hoped.

The only ones not in the room were Jacob and Rosalie who'd remained downstairs with Renesmee, but they were still here. Bella wanted to see her daughter, but she remembered Jazz's assurances that Mae was perfect, and that she needed to hunt before greeting her. She regretted asking for her family first. She was impatient to have this reunion over with so she could get through the hunting part faster. Renesmee was waiting for her. How different would she look now that Bella had full access to her eyes, no more obscured, half-seen human vision.

The entering family members moved to stand on either side of Jasper, but Bella was suddenly absorbed in the knowledge that no cold emanated from Jasper. They really were the same temperature now. His head turned and her eyes zeroed in on his scars again.

"Hey, Bells!" Seth exclaimed immediately, already at ease with the situation.

Bella couldn't make her throat work to reply. Her mind was stuck on counting the interlocking ridges on Jasper's jaw. There were so many sets of the raised teeth marks. How many vampires had tried to kill him? How could anyone survive what he obviously had?

"Are you feeling overwhelmed?" he asked, eyes scanning her face carefully for signs she felt threatened or was about to lose it and attack someone. There was an air of uncertainty about him now. One that was growing by the second. Was something wrong? Had he sensed something she'd missed?

Bella nodded absently and glanced around, searching for what had him so uneasy. There was nothing obvious, but maybe she'd -

Oh. She was still the threat. She was a dangerous newborn. Stronger than everyone else. Out-of-control - though she didn't necessarily feel all that crazed. Particularly not with everyone in the world she loved most currently under the same roof as her during this momentous occasion.

That was when she noted Alice's ear-splitting grin from her place a half step behind Seth, and Esme's proud smile. Emmett was rocking a bit, rapidly shifting his weight from foot to foot, almost as if he was readying to pounce. Bella didn't particularly feel like being his prey, but he just grinned when she shot him a discouraging frown. Carlisle, on the other hand, was studying her as intently as Jazz had been, brow furrowed. When he caught her eye, he glanced away quickly to Jasper.

"How do you feel, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"There's so much to see, and hear, and I can taste so many things in the air!" Bella exclaimed, admitting to her internal struggle as succinctly as possible while failing to hide her excitement. Seth laughed easily, delighted by her exuberance.

Her senses were pulling her in opposing directions, each demanding she acknowledge the information they were collecting. Was that what had them worried? Was she not behaving properly? She never had before, so she wasn't sure why they'd suddenly expect her to start following the norm now.

On top of that she couldn't keep her mind focused on a single topic long enough to do it any sort of justice. The clarity and completeness of her new reality would take decades to be appreciated properly, not these random intervals of milliseconds that were all the more she was currently able to devote before something else nabbed her attention.

Alice's sudden laughter prompted Jazz to offer her some advice. "Try focusing on just one thing at a time. Center your mind."

Instantly he'd captured her interest again. The others ceased to exist.

The first time she'd seen him her focus had been riveted on the perfection of his face. Now she focused on the imperfections marring his throat. Jagged, irregular half crescents patterned his neck, sometimes overlapping before disappearing beneath the collar of his pale blue button-down shirt. Bella swallowed compulsively as her eyes trailed a blazing path down his length. How far down did they extend? Was his unseen skin just as textured? And had he always been so muscular?

Most high school boys, particularly in Forks, lacked any sort of sculpting and strength. Jasper had always worn loose fitting clothes to mask his soldier build. Bella's new depth and degree of sight made it impossible to miss however.

"Well, isn't this interesting," Emmett said suggestively.

"My thoughts exactly," Seth added.

"Jasper, you're projecting," Alice whispered.

"Sorry. I -" he replied uneasily, breaking off before finishing and shooting Bella a guilty look.

Bella sensed the emotions then. His gift was different than when she'd been human. Before she'd had no choice but to feel as he wanted her to feel. Now, it was more like a sink left on until it overflowed to flood the room, but she was wrapped in waterproof clothing. The emotions touched her without penetrating. Yet somehow she knew that she could accept them, let them soak in if she wanted.

Mortification. It replaced all other emotions as she realized Jasper was just reflecting her own feelings back at her, and the others had picked up on it. Specifically, her increasing desire and fascination. At least Jazz was kind enough not to announce her feelings so explicitly.

But how was she supposed to manage the whirlwind of rapidly changing emotions?

"Jasper is going to take you hunting, Bella. I'm sure he can answer any questions you have," Alice suggested pointedly.

Bella's love for her fortune-telling sister grew exponentially. There couldn't possibly be anything else Alice could do to make Bella love her more than to help her through this transitional period.


	11. 11: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Sorry for the long absence! I was on vacation in Guatemala and Belize, and forgot to mention I'd be gone for a while. Updates should happen a bit more regularly now, though probably only about 3 a month since I also just got an Australian Shepherd puppy and she's pretty time consuming on top of working full time.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

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Chapter 11 - Jasper

Bless Alice for changing the subject. Jasper wasn't about to explain that Bella's… appreciation… of his person was wreaking havoc on his senses. His own emotions, an unexpected mirror of Bella's were spiraling from him in a dizzying array. He didn't know what to think, and for some reason, he couldn't stop his body and gift from reacting in an all too noticeable way. In a hundred and fifty plus years he'd never been taken off guard so thoroughly. He was utterly disarmed. And all by this formerly fragile human girl that was currently standing strong and confident before him.

"What is it she needs to know about?" Emmett asked, mock innocence.

Emmett was near to bursting with devious curiosity. His brother was highly amused, and if he fully understood the situation, he would tease Jasper endlessly - Bella as well. Em would be the one careless and reckless enough to provoke a newborn with thoughtless remarks. Seth was right there with him too, though his emotions were colored with a touch more kindness and good-natured happiness. He wasn't the instigator that Emmett was.

"We can help her now. She doesn't need to wait and ask Jasper when they're hunting," Seth agreed, failing to hide his smile.

Carlisle didn't need the new dynamics explained. He'd comprehended Bella's new feelings immediately. And he was stunned. Stunned speechless. A rarity for him. Stunned both by her control, and her obvious interest in Jasper. For all his intelligence, he'd not imagined this development occurring before he'd been confronted with it staring him in the face. Now he was pendulating between concern, likely for Edward, and scientific inquisitiveness over how her change differed from the others'.

Alice, eyes clouded and distant, was too busy watching the future to weigh in on Seth and Emmett's comments. Her emotions were a mystery - as usual, though a touch smug if he had to guess at what little he felt from his ex-wife. He'd have to talk to her about all of this later. She should have at least given him a heads up on what to expect. He'd have liked to steel himself a bit more if he'd been better prepared to expect this surprise.

"Boys," Esme warned, shaking her head slightly. "Everything's different now. Give her space to figure things out for herself without teasing or making it more difficult."

"Where's the fun in that?" Emmett whined good-naturedly, rubbing his hands together in a humorous imitation of a cartoon villain. "Bella's tough, she can take a little ribbing. It's part of being a Cullen."

"Her world just turned upside down and she needs time to accept her new reality, and everything she's now feeling. I expect you to respect that," Esme said more firmly.

Emmett immediately backed off. Esme and Rose were the only two capable of wrangling the massive vampire with such ease. All it took was a stern lecture or a frosty look and he turned into an overgrown teddy bear.

Esme's emotions, by contrast, were a bittersweet happiness. A sense of feeling justified. One side of her lips turned up as she watched Bella discreetly eyeing Jasper. Had she already suspected this?

Wait - suspected what? What precisely was happening?

Was Jasper really thinking that Bella wanted him? That was ludicrous! She was just feeling overwhelmed with all the changes that had taken place to her senses.

Overwhelmed. That was why he didn't feel the expected revulsion from Bella. Or the instinctual fear. She knew Jasper was her friend, so her brain was likely getting tripped up processing what it should feel and what it wanted to feel. Bella's reactions had always been outside the norm. This was just one more time that happened.

Right. That made a sort of logical sense. Bella wasn't actually attracted to him.

Ugh! But she was, and he didn't want to deny it. Or resist. Or pretend to be oblivious.

He wanted her. He couldn't deny it. He was highly attracted to her, and it went far beyond the physical - he just hadn't realized it until she'd reacted to him.

Bella's emotions weren't just unusual. She was the sole exception to his past experiences. Her unique reactions to his appearance were even more profound than her attraction. Enough women had desired him over the centuries that it left him unfazed, despite being able to actually feel what they felt for him. Or maybe that was part of the problem. Because no matter how much a woman wanted him, part of her was always equally repulsed by him as well.

If a vampire was attracted to him, typically she was too put off by his disfiguring scars, and would end up more interested in Carlisle or Edward. The scars practically screamed danger. They were a flashing billboard in Times Square declaring him a threat. He was deadly, and to mess with him guaranteed a swift and final death. It was enough to drive anyone away.

Not that Jasper had ever minded. First he'd been devoted to Maria. She'd known him before the scars, but her desire had been calculating and strategic. She'd used him - her naive pawn and whore. He'd been blind to ignore the truth for so long.

Then there'd been Alice. She'd tried to love him, but she had her own issues - one's he was incapable of helping her with — and she couldn't help shying away from his past as well. It was easy to see now that they really had just been best friends, companions and lovers rather than true vampire mates.

Regardless, he'd been so completely devoted that he hadn't cared or been offended by what other women thought of him.

And as for humans, they sensed the dangerous predator lurking just beneath his skin, far too close to the surface for most to consider. His feral beast was much less tame than the others, and instinct prompted more fear than desire from human women. That ingrained survival instinct informed them he wasn't worth the risk. And honestly, he'd never have been as strong and patient as Edward to even dare attempt tangling with a human. He wasn't a masochist.

Jasper was unable to detect any fear or disgust from Bella though. A fact that thrilled him. Moved him in ways that were foreign and lasting. She'd been doing that a lot lately. Bella was simply fascinated, and rather undeniably aroused. Jasper wasn't even sure she realized it herself. She was still such a novice to carnal desires.

All the same, he felt another link in the growing chain that united them. She accepted and desired him as he was. It was a gift no other had ever given him. An opportunity his nature willed him to embrace. One he didn't particularly want to fight.

"She's right, Bella. You're doing wonderful, but we should hunt soon," Jasper prompted, cautious over how she'd react to being teasing now, and worried that further delay would test her past the point her nature would allow, and she'd snap. "If you have questions, I can answer them while we're out."

He hadn't meant to project her emotions outward the way he had. Her embarrassment had already been forgotten - thanks to the fickle nature of newborn attention spans. He'd simply been trying to push them away from himself so he didn't behave inappropriately. So he didn't do something reckless like ravage her in front of the family. Resisting what was freely offered had never been his strong suit, after all.

"You're taking me? Alone?" Bella asked breathlessly. Her eyes had widened comically at the realization.

"Yes. If that's all right… " Jasper confirmed, tailing off as he wondered whether she'd want to be alone with him just now. The longer she went without hunting, the tenser he felt. Add in this new plethora of hormonal triggers, and he was starting to feel like he was the novice in this situation.

The sensation of Alice being highly entertained cascaded over him like a rushing waterfall. Her relaxed state only served to make Jasper tense up more. Had she seen something else? No concern or warning came from her, so perhaps there wasn't cause for alarm. But Alice wouldn't see it until it was too late if Bella did end up attacking someone. It'd be a split second decision.

"Okay. Sure. You'll take me hunting," Bella agreed, nodding. He felt her self-consciousness and apprehension over the first major undertaking of her new life. Despite that, she remained a column of relative tranquility. Her doubts were not consuming her.

How was it possible that Bella was so in control? She was entirely herself. The only hint that something had changed was her growing curiosity.

In the past, Bella had remained largely uninterested in her surroundings. Understandable for sure with Edward demanding the majority of her focus, and Bella more than willing to give it to him. She'd given Jasper a taste of that attention, and already he was jonesing for more - no wonder Edward had been hooked.

Now though, she looked to be taking in everything. She'd opened her mouth to say more, but been distracted by the people surrounding her. Currently, she was studying each member of the family in turn.

Jasper felt Bella's love for their mother. As well as the feelings of a child seeking reassurance and support. Awakening consisted of an onslaught of changes that were difficult to adjust to, so it was understandable. From what Jasper knew, Bella had often acted as the parent within her family. Now she was getting the chance to be the child and appreciate Esme's guidance and maternal love.

Emmett was projecting joy and anticipation with a playful edge. His brother wanted to take advantage of a new playmate, particularly since Bella was sturdier now. Bella hadn't yet thought of that. Her feelings indicated that she was just happy to have her big brother around.

Fond admiration. Inquisitiveness. Bella smiled slightly as she met Alice's eyes. Jasper sensed she had questions, and she expected that Alice would have the answers she sought. There was gratitude too. He wasn't sure why, but he could guess it was because she remembered Alice's idea to have everyone change Bella.

Bella's attention was lost for a moment as she focused on the car passing the house out on the highway. He felt her wonder at being able to hear it. Jasper tensed ready to restrain her if she went after the driver. He could hear the thudding heartbeat, and felt the desire for blood himself. The whole room had been relatively soaked in it, and the cleaners did little to mask the fact.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

For a moment it was all Jasper could hear. The noise reminding him of the true relief he could find if he drank from the person. The quenching bliss that would douse the dry ache that constantly persisted in his throat. It wouldn't even -

Then Bella was back, and assessing Carlisle as if the knowledge of nearby blood was moot. Her easy dismissal astounded him. Shamed him too. He was the experienced one. He couldn't let himself get caught up and lost in his red fantasies.

Uncertainty took over. Bella was abruptly smothered in it. Jasper only had to look at Carlisle to understand for himself. He bit back a smile as he noted Carlisle studying Bella like she was a science experiment with unexpected results that he couldn't interpret.

"What's wrong?" Emmett asked, seeing Bella retreat a step. "You going to lose it on us?"

"I… don't think so?" Bella said cautiously, looking towards Jasper for confirmation. "I still feel like me. Wasn't I supposed to lose that - at least in the beginning?"

"Yes, Bella, to a certain extent you'll have some trouble feeling normal and like yourself. But the degree of difficulty varies from person to person. Some have a harder time than others settling into their new reality. You, apparently, seem to be struggling less," Carlisle explained, taking on the role of leader and teacher. "Much less it seems," he added thoughtfully.

"Oh," Bella said, nodding. "So there's nothing wrong with me?"

"Quite the opposite, in fact," Carlisle said kindly. "You are quite controlled. More so than I expected, even with the time you had to prepare yourself mentally for this."

"You think that's the reason she is adjusting so well now?" Jasper inquired. Bella did have time to educate herself and understand what she was getting into. The law and circumstances didn't really allow for others to do that.

"A year and a half is a long time to process things. Even for a slow human mind," Emmett said, nodding along with Jasper.

"She is taking to this with relative ease," Esme said kindly. "I'm so proud of you, Bella dear."

"I'm not sure about that," Bella denied, shaking her head, and looking around at the assembled group.

"Why not?" Carlisle asked.

"Everything keeps distracting me. My emotions are a little wild as well," Bella whispered and ducked her head shamefully. "I think… Well, it just… "

She snuck a peek at Jasper, almost like she'd been helpless to resist, and he felt her embarrassment return only to be quickly replaced with surprise. Her hand reached to touch her cheek thoughtfully, lingering for a full second.

Jasper hid his amusement as he interpreted her actions. Bella had just realized that being a vampire meant she could no longer blush.

"No more pink cheeks, Bella," Emmett complained, making the same realization. "You better still be clumsy or I really will have to tease you about -"

"Emmett!" Esme cried exasperatedly. Apparently he'd already forgotten her earlier admonishments.

Jasper wouldn't deny feeling a bit of relief over this development in Bella. Whenever her blood bloomed high in her cheeks - and honestly it seemed to happen more often than it didn't - he'd been tempted to sink his teeth into the smooth ivory column of her throat. Edward had lectured him repeatedly over his wayward thoughts. It was an experience he wouldn't miss.

"I live to amuse you," Bella said dryly, but her heart wasn't in it.

Bella was distracted, discreetly touching the skin of her arm. Her fingers moving deliberately over the surface, back and forth, back and forth. She must have noticed the new texture. That had been rather shocking to him upon waking to this life too. Smoother than polished marble, and somehow softer than velvet. Such contrast was engrossing.

"You're not exactly living anymore. But don't worry, we have time for me to figure out new ways to torment my little sister," Em replied, laughing boisterously and deliberately pretending not to see Esme's chiding expression.

"Don't try too hard or you won't like the deal you lose," Alice warned.

"Lose? I never lose!" Emmett exclaimed. Alice just shook her head, a knowing smile firmly in place.

"Anything else?" Jasper forced himself to ask, returning to the original topic and concentrating on helping Bella in whatever way she needed. Bella had seemed quite certain that she wasn't adjusting as well as they thought, but if getting distracted really was her only issue then she was even more unique than he'd first guessed. And it did nothing to ease his high strung nerves.

"Not really. Should there be?" Bella asked, a tiny crease forming between her eyebrows.

At first no one spoke. Jasper felt the surprise and doubt coming from the room's occupants. No one was quite sure what to make of Bella.

His mind was focused on reading her. Repeatedly. At first he thought he was processing her emotions inaccurately. Or maybe he was still distracted by her initial arousal. But she was calm. Too calm. Mostly she just wanted to understand. She watched him studying her, eyes rapidly scanning his face.

Impatience and worry quickly replaced any lingering peace she felt. They were the strongest emotions she'd yet felt. He stepped closer, ready to influence her or restrain her if she became anymore distressed.

Her agitation spiked the longer everyone remained silent. "Jasper?" Bella asked, demanding an explanation from him. She was the edgiest she'd been since waking, but this was still far from the norm that he was used to dealing with. Bella was making him nervous on two fronts now - intimately and unpredictably.

"You can't imagine how unusual you are. I've encountered thousands - literally - of newborns. None have been able to hold a conversation the way you are - especially not for several minutes the way we just have," he explained, tensing slightly in case she took offense. "You still haven't hunted, yet you're… _you_. You're Bella. _Our Bella_."

"Oh… " she said, relaxing back into a curious calm. How had she done that? "What do they normally do?"

"Fight," he admitted. "Everything is a potential threat that needs to be destroyed before it has a chance to hurt them first. But mostly they fight for blood. Their primary focus has always been to seek out blood - immediately. Then to consume more," Jasper continued, wondering how she'd react to hearing about blood. So far he'd detected no bloodlust - strange in itself - but he needed to see how the mention of it would affect her clam. Seth was far enough away, and honestly smelled extremely unappetizing, so he figured the pup was safe even if Bella decided she wanted blood like a typical newborn.

Discomfort. Jasper felt the way the pain of being thirsty filled Bella. It was muted rather than mindlessly consuming, but it still caused her face to scrunch up. Bella swallowed uselessly. Jasper watched the muscles of her throat work, and he felt her frustration when it didn't help relieve the persistent ache. This was what he'd been expecting all along, but even this was mild compared to what others of their kind went through. Bella was still rational though the more she swallowed, the more annoyed she became.

"We can go now and see to that," Jasper offered, reaching for her wrist to ground her from the consuming thirst.

The moment their skin made contact, though, it was his turn to be shocked. She'd dialed back the thirst and smothered her annoyance. Her eyes were staring fixedly at where their skin touched. Pleasure. That was what she was feeling now. He felt it too. Little zaps of electricity buzzed just beneath his skin. Jolts of bliss.

Unfamiliar. Momentous. Thrilling. Bella was invoking all sorts of new emotions and responses in Jasper.

"I was going to ask you about the morphine, Bella, but Jasper is right. That can wait until you've seen to your needs," Carlisle said, interrupting the moment.

Jasper had forgotten the others were even still in the room the moment he'd touched Bella. She turned her hand, offering her palm to him. A saint offering salvation to a sinner. Without thought he shifted his fingers, weaving them with hers and clasping her small hand firmly in his like interlocking puzzle pieces.

"The morphine didn't work. At least not the way you wanted it to," Bella admitted, but Jasper barely heard her. "Not really much more to it than that."

"So you were in pain. And you must still be terribly uncomfortable, dear," Esme said softly, always considerate and aware of her family's needs. "Jasper, you should take her out now."

Her kindness broke the spell Bella had put on him. He needed to remain alert and continue monitoring Bella's mood to ensure no one unintentionally got hurt. There would be time later to think on his peculiar reaction to her touch.

"I didn't actually notice until you mentioned it," Bella said dryly, rolling her eyes. "Thanks for that."

Jasper coughed to hide the laugh that escaped. Emmett and Seth didn't bother to hide how hilarious they found her comment, and both laughed openly. It was the sassiest thing he'd ever heard the unfailingly polite Bella say.

Then he thought about what she'd said. Disbelief. How was it possible not to be consumed by thirst. He'd been assessing her emotions since she woke, knew she spoke the truth, but still he doubted it. It just didn't seem possible. Perhaps Carlisle was right about her being gifted. Maybe it was a holdover from her aversion to blood as a human. Didn't Alice mention once that Bella passed out from it?

"Amazing," Carlisle intoned, awe making his face light up.

He surely had a million more questions for her now. He'd likely spend the next few weeks interrogating her every chance he got - when he wasn't researching Mae's accelerated growth at least. How would Bella react to that? What were they going to do about it? There had to be answers somewhere. They just had to find them!

"You really think it's just because she prepared and knew what to expect?" Emmett asked dubiously.

"I told you all that she'd be unique. You'd think people would listen to me considering I _do_ know a bit more than the rest of you," Alice said primly, sharing a smile with Bella. It was enough to sufficiently distract Bella from thoughts of being thirsty. Her lack of bloodlust was so unusual. Unsettling more like.

"Bella, I think we should hunt," Jasper suggested again.

Her composure was all well and good, but there really was no sense pushing it more than necessary. They'd have an eternity to test her limits. He didn't want her in pain now or end up having something unnecessary happen to the family.

Every time Bella said or did something outside the usual, he forgot that he was supposed to be taking her hunting. Her atypical reactions were getting him off track. It was harder than it should be to stick to the plan and make the wisest decisions just now.

"I don't know how," Bella said. Her voice sounded small. Afraid even.

"Do you trust me?" Jasper asked immediately.

"Yes," Bella said without hesitating. Pride and affection filled him. He was still unfamiliar with someone placing such blind faith in him.

"I'll help you," he promised, pulling her towards the window with the hand still lightly holding her own.

She didn't budge. Worried, he looked back at her. Amusement took over at seeing Bella's wonder and joy when she realized she was strong enough to resist. He couldn't move her if she didn't want to now that she was stronger.

"We do actually have to go outside if we're to hunt," Jasper teased. Bella was still grinning, feet rooted to the spot.

He felt her nerves and knew she was worried about messing up or looking foolish. He knew she wouldn't, but she was entitled to feel that way until she proved herself wrong. He'd never discount her feelings just because he was better informed. Edward had done that to her repeatedly, and each time he'd felt the impact it had on her self-confidence.

He tugged again, but Bella didn't move. "After you meet Mae you can even test that strength against Em if you want," Jasper offered, hoping the incentive would be enough to prod her into coming with him.

Torn. Bella's emotions were oscillating in about five directions now. Her free hand had flown up to land on her flat stomach, and she was looking from the open doorway to Emmett to the window to Jasper. Then she repeated the looks. Her head was turning so fast he feared it would pop off like a Barbie doll's. She wanted everything at once. Excitement warred with impatience.

"I have to wait?" Bella asked.

Jasper knew at once she was referring to meeting Mae. "Yes," he confirmed, squeezing her hand.

"So long as you do it outside," Esme chimed in immediately, mistaking the source of Bella's question. The words redirected Bella's desires though, and she grinned predatorily at Emmett, thrilled by the possibility of taking on the formerly strongest Cullen.

"Really?" Bella asked hopefully. The fingers of her free hand flexed into a tightly balled fist at her waist, testing their new strength.

"Excellent! You're going down, Bella," Emmett challenged.

"But first -" Jasper reminded her, uneasy that she still wasn't hunting and it had been nearly half an hour since she woke now.

"Oh! I almost forgot. She needs to see herself beforehand," Alice interrupted, hands on her hips.

"Alice, I think that can wait," Jasper insisted, looking down at Bella. She'd forgotten Emmett's challenge, and was calm again, though intrigued by Alice's insistence. But the longer they waited, the more tense Jasper felt. He couldn't help it. The need to be in charge and protect everyone was so much a part of his nature.

"She won't be presentable afterwards, and she'll be distracted by other things," Alice argued.

"I'm fine," Bella said reassuringly, squeezing Jasper's hand. "And I want to see. I've been waiting for this for so long."

Jasper nodded, accepting that she knew herself best and could decide for herself what she needed in that moment. He might not like having an unfeed newborn with his family - he knew how quick their emotions could take a disastrous turn, but he trusted Bella and would step in if she needed help.

"Get a mirror then," Jasper conceded, making Alice squeal delightedly. He swallowed a chuckle at her antics.

Alice returned less than a minute later carrying the ridiculous monstrosity from Rosalie's room that dwarfed Alice several times over. She set it before Bella, ignoring Seth's outstretched arms, a silent offer to help her with the absurd burden. The mirror was so ostentatious it was laughable. Emmett had gotten it for his wife as a joke on their anniversary a few decades ago, but Rose had actually loved the ornate gilt-framed mirror.

Jasper tasted Bella's emotional climate as she took in her reflection. Would she recognize herself? At first glance, Jasper didn't think she looked all that different. But Bella had always been hard on herself. Her perception of her appearance and worth skewed until it was nearly unrecognizable.

Satisfaction and joy. Bella was apparently very pleased with the changes to her person, minor though they likely were.

Alice caught his eye and nodded to Bella. Intrigued, he turned to assess her himself. He'd studied her emotional state closely since she'd completed her transition, but there hadn't really been a need for him to truly take her in critically. Jasper did so now.

She was standing straighter, shoulders no longer hunched and rounded as if trying to make herself invisible or to disappear under others' scrutiny. It was the most obvious difference, and one that made him want to take a closer look to see what else had actually changed.

Bella's already pale skin was even more luminescent. It held a faint shimmer even without sunlight, nearly iridescent. Full rose-hued lips and wide, long-lashed eyes dominated her face. There was the usual flawless beauty and mask of perfection that all vampires possessed, but it was more than that. Perhaps it was just that Jasper still detected traces of her humanity. It made her seem a touch vulnerable. Real. Approachable.

Heavy, long hair cascaded down her back. It was a rich sable with mahogany highlights. Jasper had always been attracted to long hair. He'd loved Maria's, and always felt guilty that he didn't admire Alice's. Particularly since it'd been out of her control. Buzzed hair made it easier to combat the scourge of lice. Another choice stripped from her while she'd been locked in the asylum. Now the light rippled off Bella's waterfall of gently curling locks. They were thicker and shinier than Maria's had ever been, and the chocolate tresses reached all the way to her lower back, stopping just above the curve of the bottom.

She was gorgeous. And her new confidence was alarmingly sexy.

He'd already realized he was attracted to Bella's personality - even if he'd only just discovered the feelings, but now he was hit by the fact he was just as attracted to her physical presence. Her beauty compounded his newly awakened feelings.

Had he ever really taken Bella in as a woman? Jasper didn't think so. He'd respected Bella and Edward's relationship too much to do that. It was the same with Rosalie. He acknowledged the beauty of his brother's chosen partners without appreciating it himself.

Jasper glanced back at Alice to find her chewing on her lower lip and watching him carefully for his reaction. She smiled encouragingly then looked down at her feet. Was she -

"The eyes," Bella murmured, distracting him as he felt her horror. "How long?"

"Only a few months," Carlisle explained as Bella continued staring at her altered image. "They'll start to lighten and change soon with a -"

"_Months_?" Bella interrupted, voice high with anxiety.

Jasper stepped closer at once, pressing the length of his body to her side, ready to help. Bella's eyes locked on his reflection in the mirror. She breathed deeply three times. Jasper felt her panic and stress receding to be replaced with deliberate calm.

"I'm fine, Jazz," Bella promised, turning her head to look up at him, but continuing to lean into his body. "It's just… a lot to take in."

"I know you are. But how? You… " he trailed off. That was twice now. How was she doing it? It took most vampires decades to learn that degree of control over their emotions.

"What? Did I do something wrong again?" Bella asked, unconsciously inching closer since he hadn't stepped back yet.

"You haven't done anything wrong, darlin'. Not at all," he promised, wanting to reassure and praise her for the incredible job she was doing even if he didn't understand it.

"Then why are you looking at me like that?"

"I was going to help you," he ventured, unsure, "with your emotions. But… you didn't need me."

"I'm sorry?"

"Don't be. It's just remarkable."

"What did she do?" Esme asked, head tilted like a bird.

"She… stopped her anxiety in its tracks… like it was nothing."

"Have you ever seen another newborn do that?" Seth asked, looking around like there were hidden cameras and he was just having a joke played on him.

"No," Jasper admitted.

"How are you doing it, Bella?" Carlisle asked, research persona firmly in place.

"I don't know. I didn't want to worry anyone," Bella admitted.

"You should go hunt. Jasper isn't going to relax until he's seen for himself that you're not going to snap," Alice suggested, rolling her eyes like everyone was being supremely ridiculous.

"Don't you trust _me_?" Bella teased, looking back to Jasper and relaxing a bit. She seemed more comfortable in her skin again.

"Yes. But that doesn't mean I like unnecessary risks, and the longer we wait for you to feed, the more likely you are to lose control," Jasper cautioned wearily. He'd seen it happen enough times to know it was the only outcome.

"Okay," Bella agreed. Jasper felt her nervousness return. This was unfamiliar territory for her. He used the hand he'd yet to release to guide her to the open window.

"Don't tell me you're afraid of heights," Jasper taunted as she stared at the ground below, unmoving. Timid. Calculating. She was judging her surroundings, but at his words, he felt her fierce determination fuel her.

"'Course she is," Emmett added, egging the situation on. "Look how tame she is. A real vampire wouldn't hesitate."

Bella growled, then tugged Jasper's hand and pulled them both through the opening into the cool night air. Sunrise was about an hour off still, and the predawn air was crisp and clean in his lungs. The pair landed easily side by side in the damp grass, hands still clasped together. Her legs had spread during her leap - just enough to rip the fabric of her sheath dress - and bent just the right amount to brace for the impact.

A horrified gasp, and hearty laughter exploded from the house. Jasper assessed the damage. Ivory skin high on her thigh peaked out from the jagged, frayed edge. The skin tight bandage dress had definitely not been the most practical choice for hunting that Alice could have made - even if it did look beautiful on Bella.

She didn't even acknowledge ruining her dress. Bella was too high on the thrill of jumping. He felt her amazement at how easy it'd been. Her delight sparked his own, made him feel playful and carefree in a way he hadn't felt since being human himself.

"That was… " she said wonderingly.

"Yeah?" he asked, grinning.

"But these shoes," she muttered, frowning.

"Don't you dare!" Alice screeched, but Bella had already tugged them off and launched the offending silver heels through the window she'd just jumped out of. The sailed perfectly through - a feat she never could have accomplished before becoming a vampire. "Argh! How can you _still_ not appreciate fashion?"

"Bella?" Jasper said, distracting her. He moved closer, invading her space and bending so his lips were right next to her ear.

"Jazz?" Bella asked, nearly giggling.

"Run," he breathed, then leaned back to watch her.

Bella blinked. Her lips parted in surprise, a spike of adrenaline flooded her, but she just stood there. Jasper gave her a twenty-fifth of a second to process his demand before he took off, pelting through the trees and underbrush. Her startled gasp rang out behind him, followed almost immediately by the sound of Bella's laughing pursuit.

The newborn followed close, steps light and quick, stepping precisely where he did. She was faster than him, he could tell, but she let him guide her. Hopefully, distance and the opportunity to see for herself how different she was would alleviate some of her nervousness. Jasper could still feel the layer wrapped around her, though it was significantly thinner now - a light rain jacket instead of the snow parka it'd been.

At the river, he leapt without a backwards glance and kept running. Bella had no choice but to continue if she wanted to stay with him. This was the part he'd been waiting for. She didn't hesitate as she approached the wide crossing - well, wide for a human. This was just to give her a taste of her new abilities.

The moment she landed, clearing the river by a good thirty feet to land nearly beside him, her laughter rang out clear as a Christmas orchestra of bells. Her obvious delight at being so strong and graceful was mesmerizing. Jasper found himself laughing with her, the sounds harmonizing perfectly.

On they went, progressing deeper into the Olympic National Park. Occasionally, Jasper grabbed low hanging branches and swung from tree to tree feeling like a monkey in the Amazon. The first time Bella tried to mimic him, she squeezed the branch so hard it crumbled to splinters and she fell to the ground before rolling to a low crouch. The entire move was seamless. Like it was planned. Or it would have if it weren't for the startled look on her face. Her expression had set off his laughter all over again.

Jasper couldn't remember the last time he'd laughed so freely. He felt like he was soaring, flying high, drunk on the sheer delight Bella was projecting. Her joy was intoxicating.

All thoughts of hunting were forgotten. Jasper was far too busy basking in the positive emotions Bella was projecting in torrents. It was a monsoon in the desert and he'd been dying of thirst prior to this moment.

At one point, she slowed down to marvel at her surroundings. She turned slowly in a circle, head cocked curiously while her eyes darted all about taking everything in. Pine needles chafed and scraped one another as the wind blew and hopping birds shook distant branches. Morning dew dripped slowly from dangling leaves to form tiny puddles in the muddy ground. Bark flaked as scampering squirrels clawed their way upwards. Grey skies brightened to brilliant blue as the glowing golden orb rose higher above the canopy. Everything seemed new and wondrous.

It was an aspect of newborns that had never existed during his time with Maria. They were too busy drowning in bloodlust, training for war, or fighting for their very survival. They lacked appreciation for their surroundings, and failed to take advantage of their enhanced senses. He'd not been around when the rest of the Cullens had turned, so he didn't know if they'd reacted similarly or if Bella really was the unique creature she appeared to be.

They walked for a while. Silently. In peaceful companionship. Drinking in the sound of rustling leaves, the kaleidoscope sight of the softly filtered morning light, and the earthy scent of damp moss and decaying trees. In the distance a lark called for its mate and a rabbit bound over a fallen log.

With Bella the world was fun, full of possibilities, and everything seemed miraculous. The wonders of being a vampire were all new again. Jasper was practically as giddy as a drunk frat house. Bella genuinely loved every new experience she was undergoing, and he was getting to experience it with her.

He waited patiently for her to consume her fill of the forest. When he sensed her losing interest, he took off running calling, "Catch me if you can!"

Bella sparked at the challenge, lunging for him at once. He evaded her with ease and was off, sprinting full out through the woods again.

He used every trick he could think of to stay ahead of her and prolong the chase as he bound over streams and dodged trees. There were a couple times he almost let her catch him, but he was having too much fun to let it end prematurely.

Jasper scaled a small cliff, Bella scrambling up easily behind him, hair and dress flowing out behind her in a mad tangle. Barely two steps onto the ridge at the top, he felt Bella pounce and he allowed her to tackle him.

The two landed roughly, rolling across the uneven ground in a jumble of limbs before she pinned him in place. Jasper didn't resist, letting her win. Her smile was brilliant, infused with the joy of victory.

"Your turn," she cried, bounding up and away, ducking a partially fallen tree to disappear back over the side and fall to the ground below.

Jasper smirked at the challenge, letting her get a head start before resuming the chase.

They were approaching the Lake Leland Campground on the eastern side of the peninsula. They'd traveled further than he realized. Soon they'd be at Puget Sound. They should probably start heading back west and actually get around to hunting.

"Bella? Let's head back," he suggested, trying to catch up to her.

"No way! I'm winning," she cried, laughing merrily.

Then Bella tensed, her laughter stopped abruptly.

He smelled them an eighth of a second later. Humans. Smelled the alcohol too. Probably teenagers, possibly ones Bella knew from school. Or fishers on a trip. Like Charlie and his friends. The wet thumps of three distinct heartbeats sounded.

He couldn't believe how reckless he'd been. This was precisely why the family never trusted him. For all his experience with newborns, he'd never had one he was trying to stop from feeding. Before it'd just been about teaching them how to go unnoticed and how to clean up after themselves. Things with Bella were supposed to be different, but he'd let his guard drop, let himself get carried away having fun, instead of focusing and remaining alert. He'd let his priorities shift, and now Bella was going to have to live with the consequences for the rest of eternity.

It was obvious Bella was hunting them, her instincts taking over and letting out the vampire within. She'd gone silent and lethal. A stealthy predator.

"Bella," he hissed desperately, knowing it wouldn't do any good.

It was with a fair bit of shock that he realized she'd slowed. Slowed enough for him to catch up. Slowed to wait for him.

Jasper snagged her arm, spinning her into a nearby tree with a resounding crack. He pinned her in place with his body pressed tightly against the length of her.

She squirmed, trying twice to buck him off so she could continue her hunt. He was shocked she wasn't hissing and snapping.

Bella froze, eyes locked on his. He saw recognition. Felt it when her senses returned. He expected shame or anger. Maybe even pain from resisting the burn she undoubtedly felt.

That wasn't what he sensed.

Lust slammed into him. Not bloodlust, but pure animalistic desire. Bella's eyes widened as she drank him in, their hips still connected like a key in a lock.

It had to be the situation. There was no way she truly wanted him - not to that extent. No one had ever wanted him that much. He went through the same thing when he hunted, even if none of the other Cullens did. Her emotions were getting jumbled, misinterpreted even.

"You were hunting humans," Jasper said, attempting to focus on the present situation. Bella's head whipped back towards the direction she'd been heading in, horror smothering her desire like a bucket of water on a campfire. The chaotic, mercurial emotions were still too strong, on the verge of snapping. "Get control of yourself - like you did earlier. Reign it in," Jasper prodded encouragingly.

Distant laughter sounded. Not at all distant enough.

She shifted, unintentionally rubbing against him and rekindling the lust she'd previously plied him with. When Bella exhaled a breathy gasp, he jerked back in surprise, unintentionally releasing her.

In an instant she was gone - not continuing her hunt, but away from the temptation of human blood.

Jasper shot after her, disoriented and shocked.

Bella _ignored_ the humans.

_How was that even possible? _He couldn't believe - despite witnessing it for himself. There was no way… Never before…

He caught back up to her in the thick of the forest, far from where humans would dare venture.

"How?" Jasper breathed, too stunned to ask more.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to," she said cautiously, embarrassment forming the foundation of her emotions.

"You stopped. Mid hunt, you stopped then managed to run away. How?" Jasper demanded.

Relief overcame her, swift and undeniable. She was grateful this was the topic he wishes to focus on rather than the way her body had responded to the proximity of his. He hadn't had a chance to fully appreciate that bit yet, to bask in the emotional response they'd provoked in one another.

"Oh, that. I didn't want to hurt them," Bella said easily, shrugging lightly.

"You didn't want… "

"Of course not. I don't want to kill anyone," she said defensively.

"You say it like it's as simple as that," Jasper said. A hard truth was beginning to pound him in the face. His mental eyes were squeezed shut, afraid to confront what was staring him in the face.

"Well, not breathing helped," Bella added, thinking he was waiting for further explanation from her.

"Holding your breath helped," he said with a disbelieving huff. "You're saying that's all it took?"

"Isn't that enough?"

Jasper sensed her confusion now. Fear even. She was afraid she'd done something wrong. He didn't know how to reassure her when she'd just turned his world upside down.

"No! It can't be that easy," Jasper insisted. "They're our food, Bella. We're _designed_ to hunt them. That's the natural way of things. It's _who_ we are. _What_ we are. It takes extraordinary willpower and strength to choose a different way of life. Most can't even imagine it. Then you just… without even trying… "

"I tried! It wasn't that easy," Bella said weakly. Both could tell she hadn't needed to try that hard. "The blood smelled delicious. I'm not denying that. But it's inside a person - someone I might have known. Someone that might have a family that loves them and would miss them if I… Well, that makes all the difference," she explained, touching his chest lightly. His hand automatically came up to press it more firmly against him. "I always knew it would be hard to resist. I went into this life knowing that."

"But the burn… "

"Yes, it's definitely worse, nearly… _consuming_ with its intensity," she admitted. Jasper could feel it coming from her now. Most newborns felt it exponentially more though.

"How can you even think clearly right now?" he asked wonderingly.

"It's not exactly easy," she repeated dryly.

"I've never been able to resist once beginning a hunt," Jasper admitted sadly. He'd always failed the Cullens when it came to that.

"I think you could. Maybe… Well, I think you could," Bella said, shifting gears partway through.

He knew what she wasn't saying. Maybe he could if he ever really tried. Alice had always either warned him so he avoided the situation altogether, or the others doubted him so he gave up on himself. Bella was holding him accountable though. Not in so many words, but she was all the same. In the future he was going to have to try harder to see if she was right. If a newborn could though, surely he could as well. What if determination and willpower really were all it took to overcome their natures? All along he'd just needed the right mindset.

Her faith and belief in him never wavered. He'd just admitted to always failing, and still she thought him capable. The links binding them were stronger. An unbreakable chain wrapping them from head to toe. There was no escaping now. As if he'd want to.

"You've been awake for a couple hours now. You haven't had any blood. And yet you resisted human blood - mid hunt," Jasper said, needing to articulate everything. He needed to hear the realization aloud. Maybe that would help him believe that it wasn't a trick or hallucination.

"I'm not sure what you want me to say right now," Bella said, unsure. Her fingers curled into his shirt, holding him close as though she feared he'd try to leave her. Never.

"You're incredible."

Her eyes went black. He felt the return of her desire though he also felt how she resisted succumbing to it. Probably afraid of being rejected given her past experiences with Edward in this type of situation.

"Jasper -"

Bella broke off as her head turned, eyes closing and nose lifting to inhale the nearby fragrance of a predator. Jasper was surprised they hadn't scared it off, but the feline was perched in a tree some ten feet away. Frozen. Watching them intently. It sensed the danger they posed and was hoping to go unnoticed. It failed.

"Go on," he whispered through his anticipatory grin, barely audible. "It's a mountain lion." Still she hesitated. "Don't think. Follow the smell, lock onto it, let it guide you. Your instincts will do the rest."

Bella shot off. The feline sprung a half second behind, bounding away. As if it could outrun the newborn intent on feasting upon its blood. Foolish beast. It didn't stand a chance of escaping.

A perfectly timed leap had Bella intercepting it mid jump. The two crashed to the ground in a sprawl of flailing limbs. Nails scraped stone, finding no purchase. The grating, screeching echoes blared through the clearing, bouncing off trees before fading. Teeth snapped - Bella's and the lions - clicking and clacking sharply. Snarls. Breaking branches. Crunching leaves.

Jasper watched the two wrestling wildly, each determined to survive. But it was no competition. In under three seconds the woods were silent but for the sound of slurping. Bella had the lion's spine snapped, and she was feasting from the dead creature's neck.

It was erotic and senual. Their dance had ignited his arousal to feverish levels, and he fought as valiantly as the lion had to dampen it. Bella was simply breathtaking.

All too soon she'd finished her meal. A small frustrated frown tugged her lips down as she looked up from the drained husk. Bella let the limp remains fall to the torn up forest floor that had served as their arena. It landed like a fur throw rug, limbs splayed out like a starfish.

She stood fluidly, and Jasper's breath caught at the sight. Venus rising from the clamshell. Botticelli's painting come to life.

Tatters. That was all she was clothed in as she stood. Jasper saw more of her body exposed than he had any right to view.

His eyes locked on hers as he methodically removed his shirt and approached Bella. Damning himself with every step, but determined to act the gentleman. She let him wrap the sky blue cotton around her narrow shoulders, eyes never leaving his.

Bella had always been rather conservative, particularly compared to others of her generation, so he expected to feel her embarrassment over his seeing her unclothed body. He expected her to hold his shirt tightly closed to conceal her pert, round breasts.

Instead she surprised him. Now that he was standing right in front of her, her eyes were too busy raking over him to focus on herself. And when Bella brought her hand up, she didn't reach for the shirt edges, but for him. Gently, excruciatingly so, she brought the tips of her fingers up to trace a scar high on his chest, just a little above his heart. Light as a feather or contented sigh, she ran the edge of her shell-pink nails over each ridge left by the teeth that had bitten him.

He remembered exactly when it had happened - five years, three months, and nine days after becoming a vampire. He'd been training a newborn just days before they were set to attack a rival clan outside of Monclova down in Mexico. The vampire was a teenage boy, no more than fourteen when he'd been turned, but something about him had interested Maria. He hadn't survived the battle. She'd been furious, and blamed Jasper for not preparing him enough. Jasper had never learned the boy's name.

Bella was giving him new memories to associate with the mark. Pleasure hummed through his limbs, and a muted moan escaped his closed lips before he could smother it. Fascination and desire. That was all she felt. No revulsion. No disgust. No fear. No hesitation. No reluctance.

This whole day he'd been on an elevator, taking him to the top, to be the one in charge, to reach a new outlook on his life. But the moment Bella's fingers touched him and he processed her emotions, the cables snapped and he was in a free fall headed to an entirely new destination.

It was a hundred story plunge, and he welcomed the adrenaline surging through his empty veins. Her fingers ghosted over his skin, caressing him fearlessly.

Jasper wasn't sure who initiated the kiss, but suddenly their lips were fastened together, her full lower lip sucked slightly between his own. She tasted of blood and citrus. His arms encircled her slender waist, pressing her tighter against him. She moved easily, eagerly closer. Lips parted and tongue tangled, an aggressive battle for dominance. One that Bella ultimately yielded, following his lead.

He swallowed her moans, feeling his own rumble through his chest, taking over and clouding rational thought. Primitive urges drove him. Not enough. He needed more of her. All of her.

Shivers coursed along his nerves, dancing down his spine and radiating outward when Bella's hands began tracing the planes of his chest and back. Her fingertips deliberately sought out, and unflinchingly outlined each scar they found leaving him reeling and breathless.

It was right. Perfect. Everything he'd ever wanted or needed.

They were irrevocably bound now. He felt it. That feeling of love and devotion he'd sensed from mated couples was quickly forming. Maybe it'd be more accurate to say it was slowly revealing itself. A masterpiece painting hidden behind a lesser work that was only discovered by painstakingly removing the unimportant overlying layers of useless oils. Already their bond resembled what he'd shared with Alice, if not stronger. Certainly it was more solid and substantial.

Time lost meaning as he sank into the sensation of feeling and tasting the bliss of Bella's kiss.

Her wandering hands encouraged his own. Slowly, savoring each inch of skin he was being allowed to touch, he slipped a hand beneath the borrowed shirt and let it glide up her torso. He didn't stop the blazing trail until his fingers grazed the silken underside of her breast.

Bella whimpered.

Jasper pulled back at once, retreating several steps. Had he hurt her? Gone too far? He couldn't separate his emotions from hers. They were all tangled up. A knotted ball of overcooked spaghetti.

Bella was frozen facing him, mouth opened slightly in shock. He stopped after his third step back.

Jasper was grateful for the distance, however temporary, as he regained his bearings. It was easier to breathe without the humming current in his veins. Bella messed with his equilibrium and made concentrating difficult.

"I'm sorry. I lost control," he explained to the dazed woman. "We should talk about things bef-"

"Oh, no. Alice. I -"

Pieces clicked together as he heard Bella say his ex-wife's name. Alice had seen this happening. She must have. It was the only thing that made sense for why she'd ended things. Jasper didn't know if he should regret the pain this likely caused her or just be grateful she was selfless enough to give him the opportunity to experience this.

"No, Bella. You didn't do anything wrong," Jasper said quickly, rushing to reassure her.

"But -"

"Alice and I aren't together anymore," Jasper explained. Somehow telling Bella must have been overlooked while she'd been dealing with her difficult pregnancy. "She saw our paths headed in different directions," he explained, gesturing between them to emphasize his point.

"She saw this?" Bella asked incredulously.

"I think so. That's why she ended things."

"When?" Bella demanded, hands moving to her hips. She looked fierce as a hellcat. Jasper wanted to kiss her again.

"Officially? Since a little after you came home. Unofficially? Since your wedding," he said, biting back a smile as he watched her processing the news. Surprise was quickly followed by confusion.

"What wedding?" Bella asked, brow wrinkling.

The first seed of concern began sprouting in Jasper. He scanned her face. She really didn't know. Yet there had only been one recent wedding that Bella had been to.

"Your wedding," Jasper said slowly, cautiously stepping closer to Bella.

"So I really was married to Edward?" she asked distastefully.

How could she not remember? Her relationship with Edward had consumed the last year and a half of her life. Not to mention all the fights over getting married, then persuading Edward to actually be with her once they were. And he knew Bella remembered Mae, so how did she not remember marrying Edward?

"Bella, how much do you actually remember from before, when you were human?" Jasper asked carefully.

"Bits and pieces. It's pretty jumbled. I remember people more than events," she replied with a casual shrug. Like it hardly mattered and she didn't see the relevance. Her attention had already wandered back to his chest and he felt her growing arousal.

Only fear of her answer kept him focused on asking the question burning through him. "And Edward?"

"He didn't want me and hates my daughter," she said simply. It was like she was reciting a fact, like saying the capital of Washington was Olympia. There was no emotional investment tied to the words. No anger. No sadness. No regret. No nothing. For her it just was, and she didn't care enough to be bothered by it.

"No, Bella," Jasper said sadly, shaking his head when he saw her jaw set stubbornly. She'd always hated when people acted as if they knew more than her. "He loves you both. He was just scared of losing you," Jasper continued determinedly.

Part of him didn't want to be arguing on Edward's behalf. He wanted to feel Bella in his arms again and taste her intoxicating flavor once more. But Edward was his brother, and it would destroy a significant part of himself if he didn't correct this mistaken assumption. It would feel like taking advantage of Bella's ignorance, and he already had enough stains on his soul. He needed her to be completely informed before she chose who she wanted to be with. He owed it to the people he loved - the Cullens, Mae, Bella, all of them.

"Makes sense - given that he left and all," Bella shot back.

"He does. He'll always love you," Jasper whispered, wrestling with himself over what needed to be said. "Always want you."

"I don't want him," Bella vowed.

It would be so easy to continue what they'd started. He wanted her. Probably had for sometime now. But that nagging feeling that he'd be taking advantage persisted. Bella needed time and a chance to talk to the others. And he needed to talk to Alice… and Edward. His brother deserved that much consideration at the very least. And so did Mae…

"Mae is waiting for you," Jasper finally said. It was a legitimate reason to postpone this conversation and return to the house.

"Renesmee," Bella breathed reverently. Her whole body lit up as she said her daughter's name. She glowed from within, an undeniable radiance that made him long for her all the more.

"I'm sure you're as anxious to meet her as she is to meet you. We should head back. We can hunt more on the way," Jasper suggested.

With a jerky nod, Bella took off. The reminder of her daughter all it took to thoroughly distract her. Jasper followed close behind, unwilling to put more distance than necessary between them.

* * *

"Can I watch you first?" Bella asked.

The question surprised him. They'd stopped a few miles from the house when they'd come across a herd of deer. He hadn't expected to hunt today, had been bracing himself against the need to give in all morning, but he was equally against the idea of denying Bella such a simple request.

"Yes, but I'll ask that you keep your distance," he said.

"You think you'd attack me?" she asked doubtfully, eyebrow raised dubiously.

"In a manner of speaking," Jasper quipped. He had no desire to hide his true nature from Bella. If he really wanted the chance to spend forever with her, he needed to be honest and upfront about who he was. In that vein, he bluntly explained, "For me… hunting and sex go hand in hand. Feeding is a very sensual experience, and my emotions are already heightened from our earlier encounter. If you don't stay back, I'd try to seduce you the moment I finished feeding, and I don't think that's a good idea just yet."

"Oh," Bella said dumbly, mouth hanging open.

"Have I shocked you?" Jasper asked.

"No," she denied. He didn't believe her.

"Sometimes I forget how naive and new to life you still are," Jasper said, chuckling a bit.

"I have a daughter. I'm not that naive," Bella said defensively.

He could just imagine how prime and proper Edward introduced her to the world of sex and love making. Especially considering how much more he'd had to hold back given her human frailty, and given the fact she'd already admitted to forgetting most of it. If he had to guess, she was trying to sound more worldly than she was to impress him or keep him from condescending to her the way Edward used to. She might not remember him, but her go to response was defensiveness where males were concerned - Edward had drilled that into her until it was habit.

"You've seen and experienced very little of the world, Bella. That's not to say you don't know your own mind, but experience can make a person want different things. It's why the family was so hesitant to turn you. What if you changed your mind later?"

"I was meant to be a vampire. I won't ever regret it," Bella said adamantly.

"No, I don't think you will," Jasper agreed. She was taking to the life with such ease that he couldn't help but agree. "But you still have a lot to learn," he said gently. He didn't want her to feel inferior, just recognize that her eighteen years of life and limited travel were a drop in the bucket for what she would learn during her lifetime as an immortal.

Bella watched him, weighing his words. Finally she nodded, stepping back a few paces in silent agreement to give him the space he'd requested.

"And now I have time to figure myself out," she said.

"Plenty of it," Jasper agreed.

Jasper felt Bella's eyes on him the entire time he stalked his chosen prey. It was a smaller female deer, but she was quick and more wily than the others. He liked the extra challenge she provided. It was a strange sensation. Almost as if her eyes alone had the ability to caress him. It was intimate in a way he wasn't used to. He felt a bit like he was showing off for her too, which was highly unusual for him, but he wanted to keep her attention on him.

Afterwards, he watched as she tried to mimic his feeding style. It didn't have quite the allure that watching her tango with a mountain lion had, but it still made him want to rip his shirt off her and make love to her for the rest of the day.

The event was enough to test his resolve.

They were standing six feet apart when she finished. The distance felt like an impassable canyon dividing them. Unspoken words filled the air, crowding it till the weight felt suffocating. Cautiously they watched one another. Neither knew how to bridge the enormous, invisible gap, or even what the next move should be.

"While I would love to discuss what happened earlier, work things out, and potentially take things further," he eventually began, pausing a moment before making himself finish, "Mae has been kept waiting long enough. Don't you agree?"

"Renesmee," she said adoringly, reminiscent of how she'd said it before. He masked his disappointment that she wasn't more interested in exploring things between them, possibly hashing things out now. He'd gotten to spend the last couple days with Mae. It was only right that Bella put her first now. He'd have probably thought less of her if she hadn't. "Yes, I need to get back to her. You don't think I'll hurt her?"

"You were fine with Seth, and her scent is similar in a way," he said fondly, remembering the infant sleeping trustingly in his arms. He missed her too. "And after how you ran from those humans - all before your first hunt - I think you'll be fine."

"We should talk soon though - about… _us_."

The delicious way she savored the last word gave him hope that everything was going to work out.


	12. 12: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 12 - Alice

_Rose and Esme were unpacking several boxes. A giant pink stuffed giraffe and a pile of coloring books were already on the floor. Emmett walked in with three more boxes stacked in his arms. He maneuvered through the room with ease even though his sight was blocked._

"How's she doing?" Rosalie asked, watching Jacob cradle Mae. He'd just woken up from a quick nap and immediately asked to hold the baby. "Will she still be fine when she returns?"

"She was meant for this life. It was always going to happen," Alice said lightly, focusing on the present and knowing Rosalie had been referring to Bella. She and Jasper had been gone for several hours now and would probably be returning fairly soon. "No one is better suited."

"That's not a guarantee that she won't hurt Nessie," Jacob countered.

"_Mae," _Alice replied, emphasizing the family's preferred nickname, "will be just fine. Bella would never hurt her daughter. Now _you…_ no promises."

She didn't really think Bella would hurt him, but given that she couldn't actually see the outcome… Well, it didn't hurt to leave him guessing. Bella was sure to let him off the hook — she _always_ did, after all — and Jasper wasn't ever angry about the imprint, so someone needed to give him a hard time.

Even Rose was reluctantly accepting of his presence. Though she often treated him like a servant. He didn't seem to mind though since it always meant getting to help care for Mae. He was at her beck-and-call when it came to the baby.

"I think we all know that she'll just be grateful that I'm completely over her," Jake said easily, carrying Mae into the kitchen so he could make some lunch for himself. "I really was… Anyways, she'll just be happy that I've backed off."

"Yes, that does make things easier not having you drooling over her anymore too," Rosalie taunted, but she shot Alice a questioning look.

If Alice didn't know better, she'd think her sister was worried about her. So she'd noticed the changing dynamics between Jasper and Bella too. That was the whole family then. Well at least everyone was starting to suspect at least. Made things so much easier. No one liked a fuss or nosy family when things were new and still rather tentative. She offered Rosalie an appreciative smile. Everything was going to work out. Alice just knew it.

Rosalie's question did have her curious. Her previous visions had always been interrupted. How would Jasper react to Bella's kiss. Had it already happened? Would he act the southern gentleman and slow things down, or would he follow his heart and baser desires the way he typically did?

Letting her mind drift, Alice found the answer, along with the answer to a deeper question she hadn't yet let herself truly acknowledge.

_Bella and Jasper were facing each other in a small clearing beside a tiny trickling stream barely a foot wide. Only a few feet separated the pair, but both looked as though any distance was entirely too much. Despite that, Jazz looked tentative and unsure._

"_Bella, how much do you actually remember from before, when you were human?" Jasper asked, facing off with the woman wearing his unbuttoned shirt, hair messy from rolling on the ground and hands tangling in the long locks._

So Jasper had stopped things before they went farther than the kissing she'd already seen. _Of course he did_, Alice thought fondly. She hoped it wasn't because of her. She didn't want to stand in the way of their happiness.

"_Bits and pieces. It's pretty jumbled. I remember people more than events," Bella admitted, watching him with wide red eyes. Eyes that were far more interested in feasting on Jazz than talking to him._

"_And Edward?" Jasper asked cautiously, fearfully. He shifted his feet, unconsciously putting additional space between the two and practically bracing himself as though preparing for a blow._

Jasper loved Edward more than he'd ever willingly admit. He'd always appreciated how much Edward was able to help Alice manage her gift. That gratitude forged a bond that Jasper obviously felt like he was betraying now.

"_He didn't want me and hates my daughter," Bella replied easily and shrugged carelessly like it was no big deal. _

_Jasper stood frozen, staring sightlessly as Bella's fingers moving swiftly down the row of buttons, absently doing up the shirt._

Alice froze, halfway in the process of sitting on the top step of the staircase. Was that all? Nothing else? She'd suspected, even gone so far as to warn Edward, but to have it confirmed…

Her sister had forgotten Edward during her transition. Perhaps even willfully chosen to let it happen. Edward had hurt her so much she'd blocked out not only all the recent bad things that had happened between them, but all the good things too…

At least that explained why Bella was able to fall in love with Jasper so easily. She'd always nearly worshipped Edward, forgiving him anything and everything. Edward might be Alice's favorite brother, but Alice knew he was far from perfect. Bella had always been willfully blind to his faults. But if she didn't remember any of that… Having Jasper's devotion and friendship would be enough to turn any girl's head. Bella wouldn't stand a chance of resisting his allure - even if he wasn't trying. Alice remembered from her own time with him.

"_No, Bella," Jasper said sadly, shaking his head when he saw her jaw set stubbornly. "He loves you both. He was just scared of losing you," Jasper vowed, watching her with an almost desperate longing. She was an oasis and he was dying of dehydration. Yet still he refrained. Still he kept his distance._

"_Makes sense - given that he left and all," Bella refuted._

Alice winced. She understood why Bella thought that, but ouch. Poor Edward. He had a lot to make up for. She admired Jasper all the more though for not letting Bella believe the worst of their brother.

It was a lot to take in. She didn't really know how they should proceed. Tell Bella everything? Wait for her to ask about him? Make Edward come back and explain himself? Let Bella remain ignorant and move on without guilt or objections?

It wasn't Alice's choice to make. It was Bella's. But the family needed to know so they weren't surprised. Mae was too aware of things to wait, and Alice didn't want the baby unnecessarily upset - the little miracle she could hardly believe she ever hated and resented.

_Bella was screaming at Edward and pointing at the door of her cottage. Clearly she wanted him gone. Her wild hair resembled Medusa's snakes swaying in a dangerous halo. Edward was on his knees, head lowered and shoulders rounded. The scene was in direct opposition to a Rockwell painting. There was no domestic bliss to be found here._

The vision was there and gone in a flash. A possibility and nothing more. One that vanished the moment Alice decided to share what she'd learned with her family.

"Bella doesn't remember Edward," Alice said softly, knowing everyone would hear her.

"How is that possible?" Esme demanded, stopping her search in a design magazine to look at Alice directly.

"We all lost human memories when we changed," Emmett said, understanding at once what happened. "Especially things we didn't care about or didn't want to remember."

"_Give me one reason why I shouldn't rip you apart," Bella hissed. _

Her feral grimace made it difficult for Alice to read her lips, but she got the gist of it regardless. The vision was unexpected. She didn't know who's decision had triggered it. Bella's appearance made it obvious she'd been a vampire for a while. Her eyes were a beautiful shade of gold and the multihued leaves indicated it was autumn. Would this happen this time next year? Was this the future if Edward decided not to come back right away?

"_Renesmee," Edward replied. He looked detached, remote, nearly disinterested. Or perhaps he was scared and just trying not to let it show. Bella's responding look was so cutting, it was surprising Edward's balls didn't go rolling across the room._

"_As if she was a reason _NOT _to kill you. You threatened _MY _daughter. You _betrayed _MY daughter," Bella growled, crouching as if to spring at him. _

No one else was around. There would be no one to stop her if she did attack him. What else had Edward done? Was this the first time they'd spoken since Edward left? Had he not returned prior to this? Had he not at least called?

"_She's our daughter," Edward corrected._

"_She's not _yours_! You lost the right to claim her when you vowed to kill her," Bella screamed, stalking closer and shoving him roughly._

"_You know I didn't mean it, Bella! Be reasonable," Edward insisted, holding his hands out chidingly._

"_Reasonable! How was I supposed to know you didn't mean it? You weren't around to ask! Was it _reasonable _when you left?" Bella yelled, shoving him again and again with each javelin-like accusation. "Again!"_

"_I came back," Edward said, trying to restrain her hands._

"_You shouldn't have left to begin with! You abandoned your family," Bella growled, pointing out a fact that should have been obvious._

"_I was scared," Edward cried, finally losing his composure. It crumpled like tissue paper, utterly shredded under the talons of her verbal attack._

"_You're pathetic," she said, anger and disgust marring her beautiful face._

"But wouldn't she want to remember him?" Carlisle said, emotion a thick mask across his face and more layered than an onion in his voice.

Alice shook off the disturbing vision. It left a bitter taste in her mouth. She'd have to search for ways to avoid that outcome later.

"Why would she? Look what happened last time he was here," Rose said defensively.

_Aro was sending Jane to replace Demetri and help Felix and Santiago destroy the coven in Central America that had gotten out of hand. International news outlets had picked up the stories of gang violence. They'd failed to keep themselves in check. None were to be spared._

"Do you think… if he came back right now, Alice, do you see them working things out? How would Bella react to seeing him again?" Esme asked hesitantly.

"I don't think -" Alice broke off as she was catapulted into the future, witnessing yet another potential future for the two in question. This one much calmer than the previous ones.

"_I don't want you alone with Renesmee. I don't trust you not to hurt her - emotionally if not physically. You have a bad habit of doing that to the people you say you care about," Bella said succinctly. _

_Bella wasn't trying to hurt Edward, just bluntly stating the way things were. All the same, it was readily apparent the damage her words did. Edward looked gutted, skewered with his head on a spike. _

"_Bella… no," he pleaded, shaking his head. "I would never hurt her."_

"_You've already proven I can't trust your word," Bella said defensively, arms wrapped around her torso like she was holding herself together. Never had she resembled a poorly reassembled shattered doll more. "I remember that much at least."_

"_But you can trust him? He tried to kill you! He'll probably kill her the first time she falls and scrapes her knee," Edward yelled, waving a hand at Jasper where he sat with Mae in his lap as the little girl anxiously watched the unfolding drama her parents were engaged in. Her rosebud lips puckered into a distressed frown._

Oh, Edward. Lashing out was not the best way to handle the situation. Jasper was the last person Bella would ever expect to harm Mae. Not after how he helped her through her pregnancy. And besides, Bella had always seen the best in the people that others considered monsters - just look at the pack - so of course Bella wouldn't consider Jasper a threat. Edward's attempt to turn the situation around on someone else was just going to make Bella angrier with him. Didn't he know her well enough to predict that himself?

_Jasper didn't utter a word, but the betrayal was there. Silently, he stood, handing Rose the distressed child. Mae whimpered, reaching empty, desperately clutching fingers for Jasper, but he left the room without a backwards glance._

"Alice? Did you see anything? Can Bella and Edward work things out?" Carlisle asked, desperately hoping to repair his family.

His question caused the scene to shift.

_Bella and Jasper were alone in the cottage. She was slumped in a cozy overstuffed brown leather armchair before the fire, and Jasper was kneeling in front of her. He reached out to take her hands, but paused, seeming to reconsider and let his fall to dangle between his spread knees. Bella's face crumpled a bit as she watched him wearily. _

"_Have you considered giving Edward a second chance? He's Mae's father," Jasper said, voice thick and scratchy. _Alice's memory supplied the sound of his voice saying the heartbreaking words.

"_I don't want to," Bella denied. Then admitted, "After what everyone told me about our past, I don't think I can ever forgive him."_

"_Try. For her sake," Jasper coaxed._

Of course Jasper would have to be noble and try to do what he thought was in their best interest. Bella's absolute devotion and worship of Edward, her incandescent love for him was likely fresh in his mind. He'd felt her love for Edward himself. It would be hard for him to be with Bella and not wonder if she might feel that way about Edward again someday — to not fear losing her when he just found the possibility of happiness with her.

Alice guessed he wanted Bella to try since she was basically a blank canvas since her change. She could have a fresh start with Edward. It was a chance to build something stronger, something a little more equal. And it would give Bella a chance to see if she really did prefer Jasper. He wouldn't want to feel like a consolation prize, and he'd probably always wonder if he didn't step aside and give them this chance.

"_What about yesterday morning? When we… " Bella began, biting her lip and waving her hand, obviously unable to finish the sentence and actually mention what had happened._

"_It was a mistake. I let the bloodlust overwhelm me," Jasper said softly, eyes flicking away as he spoke. "I did warn you that was a problem I had."_

Alice had known Jasper long enough to know he always looked away when he lied. He so rarely did that he was absolutely horrible at it, but Bella was so focused on the words, on waiting for his rejection, that she missed it.

"_So you don't… oh," Bella said, visibly dejected._

_Jasper winced, her emotions bombarding him. It was enough to have him admitting, "I am attracted to you, Bella. But you're married to my brother. I can't do that to him."_

"_But I don't -"_

"_I'm going to visit Peter and Charlotte for a while. I think we all need some space to figure out how we really feel before we decide anything," Jasper interrupted, shocking Bella._

Jasper would leave if Edward came home right now? Alice understood why he'd want to take a step back, and see for himself if he was who Bella truly wanted, but to actually leave the family… He loved being with the Cullens! The separation would hurt him so much.

"_How long?" Bella whispered, disbelief and sadness drenching the question. Her pain was easy to read in every line etched deeply across her face._

"_I might stay with them," Jasper said slowly._

What if he did leave forever? Alice couldn't picture the family without him. Edward often went off on his own. He'd done it a number of times since she and Jasper had joined them, never for very long, but it wasn't all that uncommon when their thoughts got to be too much for him. But Jasper… he always stuck close to the group. He needed to be around them for his own sanity.

Besides, there wouldn't have been a reason for her to end things if Jasper wasn't with Bella. The heartache she put them both through would have been for nothing. They could never go back either - not now that he'd experienced a glimpse of what a future with Bella would entail.

Would Bella and Edward actually have a chance?

The question caused her sight to shift yet again. Alice didn't know when it was, but Bella's eyes were definitely starting to turn golden and she could see snow falling outside the window, so it must be at least a few months from now.

_Edward was kissing Bella. Passionately. Kissing her the way he'd never allowed himself to when she was human. But Bella was frozen, unresponsive._

"_I'm sorry," she said sincerely when he pulled back. Bella looked genuinely apologetic. Edward rapidly scanned her face searching for some small hope to cling to. There was none to be found._

"_You can't get passed me leaving you again, can you?"_

"_No. I'm sorry, Edward. I tried - you know I tried… but I just don't…" Bella shrugged. Her mouth opened and closed twice, then she winced and finally admitted, "I don't trust you not to do it again, and I can't love someone I don't trust and I'm always on edge around."_

_Edward's eyes closed, shoulders slumped in defeat. He'd finally admitted the truth to himself._

"_You miss him, don't you?" he asked quietly, looking past her shoulder as he asked. There was no need to clarify who he was referring to._

"_Everyday," she admitted._

All three of her family members would end up hurt unnecessarily if Edward came back right now. The wounds were too fresh. And it would still end up with Bella and Jasper finding their way back to one another. Alice knew with certainty that it would be Bella or no one for Jasper. He'd already fallen hard. It was the only explanation for him leaving. He'd been unable to bear witnessing Bella and Edward together. That pain was so great he'd even willingly left Mae.

This last scene made her feel better about her decisions up to this point. Even if Jasper left, Bella would draw him home eventually. Hopefully, by not forcing Edward home immediately, they could avoid his leaving altogether.

_A nurse at the hospital was calling Carlisle. A doctor had called in sick, and they were hoping he'd cover. Carlisle would have to decline, however, since they were supposedly recovering from the shock of Bella's sudden death._

"Alice? What is it? What did you see?" Esme asked. Alice hadn't even noticed her approach, but she'd seated herself beside Alice and was gently stroking her back, offering comfort.

"Bella will never love him like before. Too much has happened," Alice announced to those gathered in the family room waiting to hear news on Bella and Edward's fate.

"What'd you see?" Emmett prodded, always wanting to know more.

"They aren't meant to be together. Not anymore," Alice said simply. The potential futures she'd seen were too private to share.

"Obviously," Rose huffed, tossing her golden hair over her shoulder dramatically. "I've been saying that all along."

"Yeah, and didn't you already tell him about -" Jacob called from the kitchen where they could all hear him eating. Apparently, Alice's position at the top of the stairs put just enough distance between them for the wolf to not to block her visions.

"Jacob!" Alice warned in a clipped hiss. She didn't particularly want to tell the others she'd accidentally let Edward see her vision of Bella and Jasper together. It was their right to announce their relationship to the family when they were ready.

"Sure, sure. I know nothing," he said, the amused words muffled by a bite of food.

Emmett looked ready to go interrogate him, but Rosalie leaned into him and he just sighed contentedly and draped a muscular arm over her shoulders. The blonde smirked in response when she caught Alice's eye. Rosalie sure did relish her power over Emmett. Alice couldn't fault her when Rose used it to help her out.

No one spoke, each considering how the family dynamics were changing. Someone must have made a decision though, because suddenly Alice saw a different potential reunion for Bella and Edward.

"_I never stopped loving you," Edward said, reaching up to cup Bella's cheek. She shied away from his touch, and hurt flickered across his features, there and gone in the span of a blink._

_The pair were sitting on the sofa in the family room. It appeared they were alone, but everyone else could have been in another room listening for all Alice knew. Bella shifted closer to the arm - farther from Edward. He frowned at the subtle movement._

"_But I stopped loving you," Bella informed him, face pinched as she shared the painful truth. "I was a teenager when I fell in love with you. You overwhelmed me. Consumed me before I had grown into myself."_

It was obvious Bella had put some thought into her feelings. There was more self-reflection and honesty in what she was saying than Alice expected. The whole family had mentioned something similar to this at one point or another, but none had ever expected Bella to realize it herself. She'd been in too deep, overly, obsessively, in love and too far gone to care.

"_You consumed me as well," Edward acknowledged._

"_I remember more now than when I first woke - others have filled in the gaps - but I haven't fallen back in love with you," Bella said, watching Edward closely with blazing, sunset-orange eyes. _

"_Give me a chance to win you back," Edward requested._

"_I changed, Edward. If you'd changed me when I first asked, before you broke my heart several times over, I'd have loved you forever. I'd have been frozen into that permanent state where loving you was the center of my universe. _

"_But you insisted on waiting. You put it off. And I stopped being a teenage girl in love with a teenage boy. I stopped being in a place where that love was all that mattered, and I couldn't imagine going a single moment without seeing you and being with you. I stopped being a dramatic girl where losing your love was equivalent to the end of the world._

"_You hurt me, but I survived, and surviving altered me. Then I changed even more. I changed in ways you didn't. Ways I don't think you'll ever be able to change in. I grew up. My needs and desires shifted. I matured. I became a mother. Renesmee is the center of my universe now. Everything I do is for her, not myself. _

"_And now we don't fit anymore. You'll always be that same angsty teenage boy. The one I loved as a child, not an adult."_

It was everything Edward had feared. Everything Carlisle had feared. Their father had often worried that Edward had been too young when he'd been changed, that he hadn't had a chance to figure himself out enough to ever really be happy, and being a vampire meant he was more or less stuck in that unfinished state. Bread dough struggling to properly rise.

Then Bella came along and Edward changed just enough to compliment her.

But Bella was right. Waiting to change her meant things happened where she was forced to mature and develop in ways Edward wasn't capable of - at least not easily, particularly since he was so stubborn and unwilling.

"_And Jasper's not?" Edward asked after a prolonged silence. He'd listened to her without even trying to interrupt, as if already knowing everything she'd say and knowing there'd be no point in arguing. _

"_No," Bella said. _

"_You love him," Edward stated. It was a truth he'd already accepted, but seemed to be forcing himself to verbalize._

"_Yes," Bella agreed._

So no matter how their reunion went, it seemed to always end with Edward acknowledging that Bella had fallen in love with Jasper and that she'd never be with him again.

Edward was perfect for the shy girl that first moved to Forks and didn't feel like she fit in. But Jasper was perfect for the vampire woman that had been strong and brave enough to birth a half vampire child while still human.

"What about Renesmee? She needs Edward," Carlisle insisted.

_The pair were still on the sofa, but now there was a photo album sitting on Edward's lap. Bella was looking down and pointing at a picture of Rose and Alice holding what looked like a toddler version of Mae. She looked around four-years-old with waist-length curly bronze hair, but that didn't mean much given how fast she was growing. _

This scene was likely sometime this winter or early spring, possibly even the same day as the previous vision.

"_I've already missed so much of her life," Edward said forlornly._

"_You're here now. You don't have to miss anymore," Bella offered._

"_I'd like to try to be a father to her," Edward replied._

"_I think she'd like that as well," Bella agreed._

"_You and Jasper don't mind?"_

"_No. We're all family. Jasper is her dad, but so are you. We'll be in each other's lives forever. We should start figuring out how we fit together," Bella said, patting Edward's hand. He looked surprised, as though this was the first contact she'd either allowed or initiated._

"Someday. It won't be like this forever," Alice promised, dragging her mind back to the present. It was like trudging through a vat of molasses. Other decisions were pressing in, trying to be seen, but she wanted to be in the here and now as her family adjusted to their new reality.

She'd gotten used to having Seth around and not getting so lost in the future that she felt a little resentful now that he wasn't around. He'd wanted to go visit his mom since Leah was still in Alaska with Edward and the Denalis. He'd left just after Bella and Jasper, and probably wouldn't be back until later today or possibly even tomorrow. Somehow she'd have to make due with Jake until he returned. When had she started to depend on him so much?

For so long she relied on her visions and welcomed the idea of seeing everything - she was curious by nature and her gift enabled that quality quite well. She loved being nearly omniscient as far as her loved ones were concerned. Her sight let her help the family. But she'd barely seen anything the last few weeks, only the most important events, and yet they were just fine. Maybe it was selfish of her, but she sort of liked getting to be present in the moment and fully a part of things instead of just watching them happen in the future then missing them when they actually happened because she was already checking out the future again. It was a new experience for her, and it was one that was growing on her.

"I haven't shifted to talk to Leah yet. I wasn't sure if you wanted Edward learning about things from her mind or if you wanted to be the ones to tell him," Jacob said, coming back in with Mae and a fresh bottle of warmed blood. He handed them to a waiting Rose without protest.

"Thank you, Jacob. That was very considerate of you," Esme said kindly.

He flushed under her praise, and Alice ducked her head to hide her smile. Jake was much easier to get along with now that the imprint urge wasn't riding him so hard and forcing him to stick close to Bella. They were all rather amazed at how the magic had forced him to behave and the abrupt shift that had occurred post birth.

"I'll call Edward later. The news is probably best coming from me," Alice offered, and Carlisle nodded though he was frowning. He'd probably call to check on his son tomorrow anyways.

Jacob was just far enough away that she saw part of a conversation between Bella and Jasper.

"_While I would love to discuss what happened earlier, work things out, and potentially take things further, Mae has been kept waiting long enough. Don't you agree?" Jasper asked._

"_Renesmee," Bella said. "Yes, I need to get back to her. You don't think I'll hurt her?"_

Alice fought a laugh. Of course Bella would be fine with Mae! Her control already rivaled Carlisle's.

"_You were fine with Seth, and her scent is similar in a way," Jasper reassured her. "And after how you ran from those humans - all before your first hunt - I think you'll be fine."_

"_We should talk soon though - about… _us_," Bella said meaningfully. _

"They'll be back soon," Alice informed the others.

"And you're sure she won't lose control?" Rose asked, reiterating her earlier concern.

"She could easily hurt Nessie," Jacob added.

"Jasper won't let her," Alice promised. She really wasn't worried, even if she couldn't see the outcome.

Jacob shot Alice a pointed look at that, a knowing smirk on his face reminding her of the wolf from Little Red Riding Hood. She wasn't sure if it was because he doubted her, or if it was because Alice was already referring to Bella and Jasper as a pair when she'd warned him off mentioning it to the family earlier.

"Right. Well, it won't hurt for me to see for myself that she's fine," Jacob said, and stood to head out front.

"Don't forget to tell Bella your news," Rose said with false sweetness.

"Sure, sure. I bet she'll want to hear all about that," Jake said dismissively.

"I could tell her if you'd prefer," Rosalie offered, smiling evilly.

Jacob froze. His mouth opened and closed like a landed fish. The effect was rather comical, and Emmett was eating it up.

"Yes! Let her, mutt. _Please_," Emmett said, egging it on. Esme sighed tiredly, but didn't interfere.

"No thanks, blondie. As much as I know you'd enjoy putting it the worst way possible and likely cheer when Bella ripped me to shreds, it's probably best I tell her myself," Jacob said. He sounded confident, but he ruined the effect with his restless shifting and nervous swallowing. Even his hands were twitching spasmodically like he was being tased repeatedly.

"I was only trying to be nice, but I guess it's your funeral," Rosalie relied.

They watched Jacob exit just in time to meet the returning pair of vampires in the front lawn. Jacob gave Jasper a questioning look when he saw Bella wearing the vampire's shirt over her tattered dress. He didn't look jealous though, just… intrigued.

"Hey, Bells," Jacob greeted, speaking just loud enough to be heard inside.

"You're still here," Bella said. The statement was followed immediately by, "Why _are_ you still here, Jake?"

"See the thing is… I sort of need to talk to you… " Jacob floundered.

"That's right! Jasper said you had something to tell me. I remember him mentioning it while I was… out of commission," Bella said suddenly, seeming surprised that she'd remembered.

Emmett chuckled and headed for the door, eager to watch the upcoming drama. "This should be good. Ten bucks says Bella draws blood," he muttered.

Alice, Esme, and Carlisle followed the largest Cullen out. Rose rolled her eyes, but moved to the window so that she could also watch as she held Mae, shielding her from looking outside herself.

"Ten says she's fine with it - eventually," Alice countered.

"You can't cheat for once and see what's going to happen," Emmett cheered delightedly. "They're totally going to have it out, Alice."

"Definitely. But I'm betting she won't draw blood," Alice chimed.

Jasper just grinned hearing them. His springy curls were messy and wind-swept giving him a playful air. He was less neat than usual too, less the polished soldier always at attention.

Bella, however, glared disapprovingly and gave Jake a suspicious look. "Why do they think I'm going to attack you? What could you possibly have done that -"

"It wasn't like I did it intentionally!" Jacob cut in, yelling defensively. "You have to remember that!"

"So you did do something. I was only out for what - _two days_? Jacob, what did you manage to do in so little time?" Bella demanded, balled hands resting on her hips. Even as a vampire, she didn't look all that intimidating, and Jacob looked like he was trying really hard not to laugh at her attempt.

"Jeez, Bella, you really still are, well, _you_," Jacob said, happily stunned.

"Of course I am," Bella said easily.

"Those eyes," Jake added, mock shuttering.

"They're something," Bella agreed, frowning and self-consciously touching her cheek.

"Super creepy. Like I'm talking freak show levels," Jacob continued.

"Thanks. Now quit stalling." Emmett chuckled, rubbing his hands together gleefully. "What -" Alice watched Bella as she landed on the correct assumption and broke off mid question to stare horrified at Jake.

Evidently he wouldn't need to explain after all. Bella had figured it out all on her own and didn't much care for the news.

"You didn't. Tell me you didn't," Bella demanded, dark lips curled back to reveal venom-coated teeth.

"You know we can't control it," Jacob insisted.

"You're all right with this?" Bella asked incredulously, spinning to face Jasper. He looked surprised. Shocked, more like. Shocked than his opinion on something relating to her daughter should have any weight.

"Yes. He'll always protect her, even once she's grown and ready to be on her own - possibly away from the family," Jasper said gently. It was obvious he'd already thought a great deal on the subject.

Bella whimpered. "You think she'll leave?"

"Children grow up and eventually decide to leave the nest, explore the world on their own. Not forever, Bella. But this way she'll always have someone around to watch her back," Jazz explained, running a soothing hand down the length of Bella's spine. She shivered and leaned towards him unconsciously.

Bella nodded, then rounded on Jacob, accusing, "I haven't even held her yet. You've formed this irreversible bond with her, and I haven't even had the chance to hold my daughter!"

"Aw, man. Bells, come on! She wanted me around. I wasn't going to ignore her just cause you couldn't spend time with her yet," Jacob said defensively. Bella's eyes widened and she tensed visibly. Jacob swallowed, stepping closer and trying again to plead with her. "I'd never hurt Nessie like that," Jacob said sincerely.

"You - nicknamed - my - daughter - after - the - _Loch Ness Monster_?" Bella hissed, low and menacing.

Jasper grabbed Bella, arms slipping easily around her to lock her in a full nelson, but she kicked out at Jake anyways, landing a solid blow to his chest. He went soaring, skidding across the dirt and sending rocks, twigs, and mud clods flying in his wake. He moaned pitifully when he came up hard against a tree with an echoing _bang_!

Bella looked instantly regretful. When she didn't struggle or try to break free, Jasper's arms moved to circle her waist, offering support rather than restraint. Alice saw his scars flickering in the light, so many more than usual were on display and during an already tense situation. Her body tensed involuntarily, primed to flee or pounce. Bella, however, relaxed visibly under his familiar touch.

"Go home, Jake," Bella said tiredly, watching her friend sit up and shake his dazed head.

"That's it?" Emmett huffed, smacking his meaty hand on the porch railing. "How disappointing!"

Alice elbowed Emmett's side, grinning up at him. She felt vindicated that she'd judged Bella correctly even without the use of foresight. Her tiny hand reached out, waiting palm up for him to slap the crisp ten dollar bill he'd pulled from his back pocket into.

"Bella!" Jacob protested, ignoring Emmett.

"No," Bella said firmly. Alice could see her assessing the situation with her enhanced vampire mind. "I'll call you when I'm ready to see you again," Bella added.

"But, Bella, you know how - "

"Quil watches Claire once a week, right?" Bella interrupted to ask.

"You remember that?" Jasper whispered, stunned.

"Apparently," Bella said, equally surprised. "He does though. Doesn't he, Jake?"

"Yeah… "

"Go home, Jacob. Live your life. You already have to repeat your sophomore year since you went wolf and skipped the last bit of it. The -"

"I made up those tests! I'm just a bit behind this year," he interrupted.

"My point," Bella continued sharply. "Is that the new school year has just started and you've been here more often than not. Don't miss anymore. We can have the same arrangement those two have. You can help Rose watch her once a week and visit by invitation," Bella said graciously.

"I can live with that," Jacob said, nodding eagerly and grinning as he quickly stood up. He didn't even seem to mind the stipulation that his time with Mae would involve being with Rosalie as well.

"It wasn't up for debate," Bella said dryly, making it clear that if Jacob hadn't agreed, he wouldn't have been granted permission to see Mae at all.

"Wait, Bells?" Jacob asked hesitantly.

"Yeah?" Bella asked, drawing the word out and filling it with impatience. Apparently Bella wasn't looking to grant anymore favors just now.

"What about us? Are we all right?" Jacob asked softly, hope ringing through. "That pull drawing us together is gone… But we're still… "

"You'll always be my best friend, Jake," Bella said, smiling a bit like she couldn't help herself as far as he was concerned.

"Well, that's a relief! Now I don't have to throw away your birthday present," Jacob joked. Bella frowned at the reminder that her birthday was today.

Alice frowned in disappointment too. Guess the family had been right to veto her suggestion of a party.

"Jake, you have to understand - she's my daughter first," Bella began seriously, though far gentler than she'd been even a moment earlier. "Your imprinting isn't even a distant second right now. It won't be for a very long time. I need time with her before you come nosing around again."

"That's fine. Just don't cut me out of your lives," Jacob begged. And at Bella's sharp nod of agreement, concluded, "Bye, Bells," then took off into the woods heading towards La Push.

Jasper studied Bella as her eyes zeroed in on the window Rose was still standing at. Particularly, she'd locked onto the baby in the blonde's arms. His focus, by contrast, was riveted on the newborn vampire. After a moment he nodded. "Ready to go in now?" he asked easily, satisfied that she wouldn't snap again.

"Don't let go of me," Bella prompted, but already she was walking towards the house.

Jasper released her just to slide one arm securely around her waist and reach across to clasp both her hands comfortably within his free one, easily keeping step with her the entire time. He looked so right wrapped around her that way.

"I won't," he promised.

Alice and the rest of the family followed the pair inside, and gathered in close behind Bella as she stopped three feet away from Rosalie, too awed to move any further. Mae was staring at Bella, equally fascinated.

"She's so perfect. Was it really only two days?" Bella breathed.

"Her growth is still slightly accelerated," Carlisle confirmed. Jasper shot him a withering look. "But we can discuss that more later. Focus on getting to know her for yourself just now," he added quickly.

Mae reached back to pat Rose, never looking away from Bella. Rosalie responded sweetly, "Yes, that's her."

The rest of the family took their cues from Jasper. His relaxed attitude indicated that Bella was not dangerous to Renesmee, and they trusted his assessment.

Rosalie waited for Jasper's nod then partially bridged the final gap separating the mother and child.

When Mae reached for Bella, both tiny pudgy baby arms outstretched and straining, Jazz released Bella's hands and lifted Mae to place her in Bella's waiting arms so she could hold her daughter for the first time.

It was beautiful watching Bella cradle Mae close, holding her like precious cargo. Alice felt like crying as she watched the mother and child meeting for the first time, each enthralled by the other. And she couldn't help but notice how much the three looked like the perfect family standing together just now.

"I told you she was different," Alice said smugly to her family. "Someday you'll trust the crazy things I say and remember I _do_ see the future."

"I'm sure that's not all you saw," Jasper accused lightly and without sting. Alice winced, knowing he wanted to talk to her, and this was his way of reminding her that he wanted it to happen sooner rather than later.

Bella was momentarily distracted enough to look at Alice with a supremely guilty expression.

"What? What else happened?" Esme asked, concerned.

"Bella ran away from human blood without feeding - stopped mid hunt," Jasper said easily, and Alice watched as he squeezed Bella gently. It looked like he was praising her, but Alice knew it was to let him cover for the rest of what happened between them during the hunt.

Alice didn't bother confirming, though Jasper continued studying her with tight eyes, waiting for her to admit that she'd seen them together. She saw his guilt, a mirror of Bella's, and smiled in an attempt to ease it. He hadn't done anything wrong, but apparently he was still worried about her feelings. Silly man.

"Seriously?" Emmett asked, stunned. "So what… something went wrong during her change? She's not really a vampire?"

"Oh, she's definitely a vampire, just a supremely unique one. I'd never have believed it if I hadn't seen for myself," Jasper confirmed.

The family settled into a lively debate on Bella's ability to resist human blood, Carlisle leading the discussion after that. Alice chimed in with her own input occasionally, but mostly she just enjoyed watching Bella, Jasper and Mae interact.

She laughed at Bella's reaction when she experienced Mae's gift for the first time, and felt the echoes of Bella's fear when Carlisle explained the murky situation with Mae's rapid growth and what it could mean for her limited future. Bella had an uncanny way of making her reactions to each new revelation and discovery seem brand new to Alice as well. She sensed the others felt similarly, Jasper in particular.

Throughout it all, Jasper was a solid presence, a source of comfort glued to Bella's side as he had been for the last few weeks. It was beginning to be a familiar sight. And one no one batted an eye at.

"I'd like some time with her," Bella said eventually. She looked a little sheepish as she added, "alone."

"Of course. Call if you need anything," Esme said, heading upstairs with Carlisle in tow.

"Emmett and I are hunting. We should be back before her bedtime," Rosalie told Bella, bending to kiss Mae's head tenderly.

"Awesome," Emmett announced, wiggling his eyes suggestively at Bella before he followed his wife outside.

Jasper caught Alice's eye and nodded to the stairs. With a sigh Alice headed up to what used to be their room leaving Bella alone to bond with her daughter.

He sat at her desk, glancing over some of the designs she'd been working on. Most were dresses for Mae. With her unique growth, it was hard to buy for her. Her body was already too long and slender for most toddler clothes. Besides, it was a convenient way for Alice to indulge her hobby of fashion design.

The divorce papers were off to the side a bit, but Alice saw Jasper notice them. She watched silently as he picked up a discarded pen before signing them without comment. Well that was that then. It was truly official. Alice had signed them two hours earlier when the courier first dropped them off.

"You know what happened," Jasper said quietly, nearly whispering. Alice thought it was more because of the emotions he was feeling than a desire for privacy though.

"Yes."

"All of it?" Jasper asked, clasping his hands together between his spread legs and studying them intently.

"I saw bits and pieces of today," Alice admitted, then added, "I've seen other times more clearly."

"I'm so sorry that I've hurt you like this," Jasper breathed, looking up to meet her eyes as he apologized.

Alice chuckled, shaking her head. "Jazz, I'm fine. If I wasn't all right with this, I would have tried to stop it from happening. But I chose not to because I know this is the best future for all of us."

"What else have you seen?" Jasper asked quickly.

"You know I'm not going to tell you," Alice refused. "It'll be better if you just let it happen."

"Then we are going to be together?" Jasper asked with cautious hope.

"You're the only one that knows the answer to that," Alice replied.

"The only one?" he quipped, causing Alice to sigh exasperatedly.

"I only see what you decide," she reminded him. "Don't you want to be with her?" Alice asked suddenly.

"I - I… " Jasper stuttered, taken aback and making him assess her uncertaintly.

"It's okay, you know? Like I said, I've already seen enough to draw my own conclusions. We can talk about it," Alice reassured him.

"I don't want to hurt you anymore," Jasper murmured, looking at the floor, the walls, anywhere that meant not having to look her in the eye.

"I'm a big girl," Alice promised. The words had Jasper finally looking at her, a single eyebrow raised speculatively, almost mockingly. "Oh, you know what I mean! I can handle hearing this. I meant what I said. We're friends, and friends talk about these things."

"I don't know how to talk about something I don't understand myself. I don't have words for it."

"Let me ask you something else. How did it feel when she kissed you?"

A dreamy look, and a shy smile came over his face as he remembered.

"Like I was standing in the middle of a hurricane," he muttered. That wasn't the description Alice had expected.

"You're going to have to explain that one," Alice prompted, grinning. Since when did Jasper resort to metaphors?

"It was like the world was raging all around us, flying apart, turbulent, chaotic, painful. But the moment we touched I was grounded, centered. We were at the eye, and I knew true peace - bliss - for the first time ever," Jasper rambled, running his hands through his hair as he quickly explained. "But it also felt like she inspired a storm inside me. Or maybe we were the fuel, the batteries powering the storm, life, everything? I'm not making much sense, am I?" he finished ruefully.

Alice swallowed the tiny pang of longing his words provoked. Never had she heard him sound so passionate about anything before. Verbose was not a word she'd ever used to describe him before, but he was doing a good impression of it just now. It moved her more than hurt. Good. Her healing was progressing nicely. Soon they really would be nothing more than the friends she was trying to be right now.

"It makes perfect sense, Jazz. And if it happened again? Would you mind exploring things further?"

"No," he admitted quietly. "I wouldn't mind." He smirking, appreciating the understatement of his words.

"It was what you've always needed," Alice said softly, reaching out to take his hand. He gripped her tiny hand in both of his, engulfing it securely. The same way he'd done a million times before.

"It was more than that," he admitted throatily.

"I'm sorry I couldn't do that for you," Alice said before she could stop herself. She didn't want him to feel guilty. The words had just slipped out.

"Alice, no -"

"But I'm glad she can," she finished, talking over him. "You two will be so happy together."

"Will we? I don't know how to trust what I'm feeling," Jasper said, looking for reassurance given her gift.

"You understand emotions better than anyone," Alice said encouragingly.

"But not love. Look at my relationships. Maria… you," he pointed out disparagingly. "Not exactly a recipe for success."

_Charlie and Sue Clearwater were looking at tombstones. Pale blank surfaces were lined up on a table like teeth in a giant's grinning smile. Sue was biting her lip as Charlie cried, clearly torn. After a moment she hugged him, and he buried his face against her neck, shoulders shaking in a tell-tale way._

Alice shook off the scene and looked at Jasper, blinking a few extra times to clear it away. He had a knowing, understanding smile for her as he waited patiently for her reply.

"Very few get it right the first try. Esme, Rosalie, Edward, Bella… me," Alice said lightly. "That doesn't mean you can't try again. That's part of life - another piece of your humanity returned to you."

"What about Edward? What if she remembers him and -"

"Won't happen. Even if she remembers everything, she won't love him again," Alice revealed.

"If he -"

"There's no point in his even trying to start fresh. What they had is over. It'll be forever tainted by the past and his mistakes," she explained. Relief poured from Jasper like a bursting dam though she still felt his reluctance to believe her words. He'd have to hear it from Bella herself before it was real.

"Your talent sure comes in handy," Jasper joked uncomfortably. Alice knew it was hard for him to accept what she was saying, to embrace the offered happiness when it came at Edward's expense.

"I wouldn't set you up to get hurt. If you want this, go for it," Alice recommended, squeezing his large hands with her significantly smaller one.

"Thanks, sweetheart," he said, standing and moving to kiss the top of her head in an almost brotherly fashion. She felt his anticipation seeping out.

"Always glad to help," Alice said sincerely.

"Or meddle," Jasper teased.

"Hey! I find that insulting," Alice cried.

"Would you rather discuss your own prospects?" Jasper asked, suddenly serious again.

What on earth was he talking about? He wasn't going to try and set her up with a nomad now, was he? Jasper, for all the insight his gift gave him, was not a competent matchmaker. She'd learned that a couple decades ago when they'd been attending school in Bozeman back in the '80s. Repeating high school could get awfully boring, and she'd made the mistake of enlisting his help to liven things up a bit and try to make some human friends by inspiring love connections. It had not gone well…

"No," Alice said immediately, heading for the door. She had no intention of even entertaining the possibility.

"Where are you going?"

"Seattle. Carlisle needs more blood for Mae. She's too young to hunt yet," Alice said. She actually did need to get going. She'd promised to go this afternoon.

"Want some company?"

"I think I'll see if Seth wants to come. He's been asking about my car. I might even let him drive it," Alice replied.

She hadn't actually intended to take Seth, but she didn't really want to spend more time alone with Jasper just now. The wounds were still tender around the edges, like pressing on a bad bruise several days old. Besides, he should be spending this time with Bella and Mae. But now that she'd mentioned Seth, Alice actually would enjoy spending some time with him. He always made her smile and that sounded really good right now. His constant happiness was infectious and the perfect comforting balm for recovering from Jasper.

"Careful," Jasper warned, watching her closely. "He has a crush on you - a fairly significant one at that."

Alice rolled her eyes. "He's a child. He'll get over it."

"He won't always be one. And neither of you are getting older," he informed her, unconsciously echoing what Seth had said a few weeks ago.

"What happened to a few minutes ago when you were all worried and not trusting yourself? Now you want to play matchmaker? Don't you remember Bozeman?"

"I still think that was your fault - yours and Emmett's - not mine," he denied, holding a hand out to stop her from protesting. "But I'll always look out for you, Alice," Jasper promised.

"Thanks," Alice said, knowing he truly did still care about her. "Now mind your own business."

She left him standing in the middle of their former bedroom, and danced downstairs to find Seth sitting with Bella and Mae. She paused, surprised he was actually at the house, and she wouldn't have to call him. His ebony locks were damp and sticking to his forehead and cheeks. She pictured musing it up and having him laughingly swat her away when she did.

Seth grinned at her, pearly teeth gleaming with excitement. "Can I really drive your car?" he asked, not the least bit embarrassed over the content of the conversation he'd apparently overheard. Nor was he attempting to deny either overhearing it or that what Jasper had said was true.

Maybe Jasper was actually onto something. Should she be worried?

"Yes," Alice said, attempting to mimic his nonchalance, and deciding that so long as he didn't mention it, they could both pretend it wasn't true.

* * *

The drive to Seattle had been exactly what Alice needed. Seth's enthusiasm over her Porsche had nearly rivaled her own, and left her grinning so wide her face might actually crack like an eggshell. Add in the constant stream of jokes and she could honestly say she hadn't had this much fun since planning Edward and Bella's wedding.

"Edward's not coming back anytime soon, is he?" Seth asked abruptly on the way home, all playfulness vanishing.

"Not for a while," Alice confirmed, sadness filling the car like heavy storm clouds rolling in to devastate a brilliant summer day.

"He and Bella… "

"One hundred percent over," Alice emphasized.

"How are you doing?" Seth asked, glancing over at her with worried big brown eyes.

"I miss him. We were always the closest," Alice murmured, shrugging. She didn't really want to talk about Edward just now. She was already having a difficult enough time trying to figure out what she'd say when she called him later.

"But how are you doing with the rest?" Seth persisted, obviously concerned about her.

"Rest?" Alice asked, confused.

"I'm not blind. Or an idiot. I saw the way Jasper was with Bella," Seth stated. "There's something happening there and he's your husband."

"We finalized our divorce this afternoon," Alice said. It was the first time she'd told someone outside of the family that her relationship was over. The wolves must have been patrolling when they'd discussed it before.

"Oh?" Seth asked, an odd note in his voice. Alice couldn't quite decipher it, but she thought he sounded entirely too interested. Alice could practically see his wolf ears perk up. She really was in trouble with the young pup if he actually liked her. The last thing she wanted was to ruin their new friendship. He was so much fun to spend time with!

Floundering, Alice said, "Yes. I'm fresh out of a fifty plus year marriage." Hopefully that reminder would put a damper on his enthusiasm.

"You don't seem all that upset," Seth pointed out, grinning broadly at her.

"Eyes on the road. I'll never forgive you if you wreck my car," Alice commanded.

"I won't wreck. My reflexes are as good as yours," Seth vowed, but looked back out the windshield regardless. "You're not upset about being single?" Seth asked again.

"It was my decision," Alice said sharply, trying to make it clear it wasn't any of his business.

"That's not a real answer," Seth said, ignoring her tone. The blatant disregard had her teeth grinding, which only seemed to make him chuckle to himself. The nerve!

"I'm more all right with it than I expected," Alice finally elaborated. When his smile grew impossibly wider, she added. "It hurts, and I'll miss being with him, but I think maybe I'll be happier when I meet someone else - someday, years from now." Maybe that would dissuade the scamp.

"Right. Makes sense," Seth said, excitement barely contained. "You'll just be open for finding love again someday."

"Seth -" Alice began warningly.

Seth's smile widened, unrepentantly, and he interrupted, commenting, "I saw the dress you made Mae. It was like a piece of art."

That was one of the most intriguing things about him. He kept her on her toes guessing what he was going to do or say next. Typically she hated not knowing, but she welcomed the experience with him.

"Thanks," Alice said, surprised he'd known she designed it and grateful he'd let the other topic go even if she was scrambling to catch up to the change in topic. Not to mention how flattered she was that a guy had noticed her work enough to remark on it and learn that she'd done it. "It's been something I dabble on and off with over the years."

"Have you ever considered pursuing it as a career?" he asked curiously, glancing over at her before quickly returning his eyes to the road lest he get chastised again like a wayward, misbehaving dog.

"Not really. I do it for fun. Playing with the stock market is my official career," Alice said.

"Yeah, but you always know the outcome. It's not really a challenge for you," Seth said bluntly. "Designing would let you express yourself more and… and it's none of my business," Seth said, backtracking quickly as if worried he'd offended her. She laughed, knowing he was right.

"Maybe someday I will. What about you? What do you want to do?" Alice asked, redirecting the conversation.

"Travel. See the world. So many of my people never venture beyond the Peninsula or even Seattle. I want to go everywhere," Seth said quickly. There was a spark when he said it, an inner fire that burned bright with his desire, and she saw it when he spoke.

"Stick with us and you'll be wishing for somewhere a little more permanent," Alice said lightly, watching him.

"Is that an offer?" Seth asked, eyes focused on the road stretched out before them. His hands were gripping the wheel tighter. Jasper really had called it. Seth's crush was so clear, she wondered how she'd ever missed it. Alice saw it in 3D now, but she didn't want to hurt his feelings by rejecting him. And she would hurt him, because there was _no way_ she was going there with him.

"I was actually asking about jobs," she said lamely, avoiding a return to the conversation that he apparently wanted to have while they were stuck alone in this car.

"Oh, right, of course," Seth agreed, letting her off the hook. "Before phasing I wanted to be a doctor. I was really sick as a kid and spent a lot of time in hospitals. I figured if I lived long enough to make it to college I'd become a doctor and try to save someone else. But now I think I'd rather be a vet so I can help members of the pack - like Jake last spring."

"You were that sick?" Alice asked, surprised by the lump of fear that lodged in her throat when she heard that bit of Seth's history.

"I had a pituitary tumor. It took years to properly diagnose it, then it came back after the first surgery. It didn't help that the chemo didn't work, and we couldn't afford radiation therapy, so It messed with my hormones quite a bit. It was why I was so small at first even after I phased - why the others were so protective even though I'm only a few months younger than Jake. It took a while to heal," he explained.

"But it's gone now?" Alice asked, much louder and more concerned than she'd meant to sound. So much for thoroughly shutting him down…

"Yeah. Carlisle ran tests over the summer. All gone. Becoming a werewolf fixed things," Seth said, grinning. "Just another reason I love being a wolf, saved my life - literally."

"He never mentioned it," Alice said, frowning. Seth was over a lot this past summer. He'd helped with a sizable portion of the wedding preparations, and hung out with Edward more than once. Edward must have known about it too, and he hadn't told her either. Of course Edward never shared other people's stories, but still! "You're sure you're better?"

"Are you worried about me, Alice?" Seth asked. The question started out teasing, but he glanced at her, and after catching sight of her expression, he turned abruptly serious. Intent on her answer, he watched her until she replied.

"Yes," she said sincerely.

"Don't be," Seth said meaningfully. "So long as I keep phasing, you're stuck with me."

Alice didn't know what to make of that, so she settled for enjoying the companionable silence that settled over the car for the remainder of the ride.

* * *

"Hello?" the cool, sad voice asked from the other end of the call.

"Hi, Edward," Alice said softly.

"Is she alive?" he demanded, no preamble.

"Yes. They both are," she promised quickly. "You have a daughter."

"I… " Edward began. When he paused, she saw what he planned to say.

'_Alice, I messed up,' Edward confessed, gripping the phone so hard a little crack appeared in the plastic on the side._

"Yes, you did," Alice agreed.

A weak chuckle sounded through the cell.

"Thanks for not making me say it aloud," Edward said brokenly.

"I love you, Edward," Alice vowed, knowing he needed the reassurance.

"Are they safe? And happy?" he said, the last word choked and guttural.

'_Is she with him?' She saw him asking._

"Yes," she said simply.

"Good. Good. Well, at least there's that," he said, thoroughly shocking her. Maybe he didn't realize she'd caught the final question.

"Would you like to hear about either of them?" Alice offered.

"I can't… It's too much," Edward refused.

"I understand," Alice said gently. "But Edward? Don't punish yourself for too long."

"Tell Leah that. She has no intention of letting me off the hook anything soon," Edward said with a sigh then disconnected before she could ask what he meant.


	13. 13: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

Sorry for the long absence. I've been out of the country on three separate trips, bought a house/moved, had surgery, and started a third part time job since summer so time to write has been nonexistent. I'd love to promise no more absences, but I can't. The only promise I can make is that this story will eventually get written in its entirety.

That said, I've also rewritten this chapter about a dozen times and it still seems off. I can't figure out what's wrong with it, but I didn't want to make you wait any longer so here it is. I hope you enjoy it; please let me know what you think!

* * *

Chapter 13 - Bella

The family respected Bella's desire to spend a few hours alone with her daughter. The only interruptions had been Seth's arrival and subsequent departure, then Carlisle appearing to track the progress of Renesmee's growth.

The second interruption had been terrifying, and left Bella attempting to hide her helplessness. She'd longed for Jasper to help her regulate her emotions in the face of visible proof that Renesmee was aging significantly faster than a typical infant. Nothing in her limited experience had prepared her to cope with the situation she was now facing. The prospect of living forever when her daughter would not was daunting. How was she supposed to handle it?

The rest of the afternoon and evening had been spent with Renesmee recounting all of the adventures Bella had missed out on while changing and hunting. Pictures and impressions played in her mind like watching the most riveting and fascinating movie in existence. Renesmee seemed determined to share every moment Bella had missed. Even the most commonplace action like yawning was shared, and Bella rejoiced, relishing getting to experience it with her precious child. It made Bella feel as if she'd still been part of it when she was able to view it for herself and learn how her daughter felt during each momentous event.

Aside from Mae's obvious fascination with Jacob, Bella loved seeing it all. Did she really have to find her soulmate already? Yes, it was great that she'd never have to experience a broken heart or anything like that, but she should have a normal life, and fall in love naturally!

Bella chuckled at her own ridiculousness. A normal life? Sure. That was definitely possible with a diet of blood and a family of vampires and werewolves...

Mae had been asleep for about ten minutes now though. Her tiny chest rose and fell in soft, even breathes. Every now and then her eyelashes would flutter briefly, like butterfly wings, betraying her peaceful dreams. The rosy blush shading her cheeks deepened two whole shades while she slept bundled up in a white fleece blanket.

Bella had been reluctant to relinquish her claim on the little one, particularly once she realized she could actually watch her growing. What if she missed something important when she wasn't looking?

Her hair was the most noticeable feature, the corkscrew ringlets becoming more defined by the hour as they slowly replaced the typical newborn's fluffy downy wisps. The coppery-bronze shade both unusual and attention grabbing. It's uniqueness tugged at Bella's memory, but she ignored it, pushing the thought back and letting only thoughts of Renesmee consume her. Her daughter's blushing cheeks were less round and chubby than they had been when Bella had fed her for the first time ever too.

Feeding her daughter had been a singularly frustrating affair. Bella resented not being able to completely enjoy the experience, but the intense flare to the burning in her throat had made the whole thing a double edged sword. Bella had no desire to let someone else get to feed her daughter every time. To that end, she'd held her breath, grit her teeth, and borne the increased pain until Renesmee had finished. She'd done it smiling all the while so as to not alert or unnecessarily upset her daughter.

It was all the more vexing considering she'd hunted only that morning, and was still filled to the brim with liquid. No more blood would fit in her body even if it was available, yet her throat still ached. A collapsed straw sucking at air - fruitlessly seeking blood - had somehow replaced her esophagus.

Despite her discomfort, there hadn't been a single moment that Bella feared losing control. Perhaps it was a false sense of security, but it was there all the same. She highly doubted that the others would have left her alone with the perfect creature in her arms if she could honestly be a threat.

Pride filled her with the realization that she was such a natural at being a vampire. She'd always believed that she was the life that she was meant to have and now here was proof to support it. Why had she ever even waited to change?

The question flitted away when Jasper slipped quietly into the room, leaning unobtrusively against the far wall. The new presence also provided ample distraction from the nagging, persistent dryness longing to be quenched. His position left him just barely within her peripheral vision. A human wouldn't have detected him at all. Bella was surprised he'd stayed away so long. She hadn't meant to include him when she asked for time alone with Mae, but she didn't regret having that time either. She'd missed Jazz though.

Bella waited, sensing he wanted to say something. Minutes ticked by and he remained silent, content to simply watch her and Mae.

She'd overheard his conversation with Alice, and part of her was thrilled he wanted to explore things. It didn't even seem strange to her that he'd discussed it with his ex-wife. It was actually quite liberating. Bella had been concerned that Alice would be hurt after learning she and Jasper kissed. Now she knew the sister she loved was all right with it. They weren't shamefully going behind her back.

That conversation had also relieved some of her fears that Jasper didn't want her. She'd been worried when he stopped them earlier. From what he'd said, quite the opposite was true.

Bella looked over and met his gaze head on. The intensity captured her like getting snagged in a fisherman's net. All knotted up in a single movement. Inescapable. All that existed was the miniscule weight of her daughter, her regular breathes fanning against Bella's neck, and the magnetic pull of the man across the room.

He was still shirtless, having lent her his, and she was finding the sight utterly distracting. The individual muscles of his arms, chest, and abs stood out the way an Olympic swimmer's would. It was hard to think when she could remember the way his scar-roughened skin felt against her palm, the sweet taste of his kiss.

She idly wondered if he could feel her desire from his current distance. None of the expected embarrassment rushed in to head off or dampen her attraction.

"As much as I don't mind wearing your shirt, do you know where my clothes are?" Bella finally asked, needing to cut the mounting tension. It was the first thing she'd thought to say given the content of her thoughts.

"Carlisle and Esme prepared a small cottage for you and… oh," Jasper started, but stopped with a tiny shake of his head and a disbelieving huff. Bella felt an ounce of frustration when he didn't elaborate, but she willed it away with a deep breath.

"What?" she prompted, a hint of impatience coloring the question despite her attempt to beat it down.

"Nothing," Jasper said, smiling fondly. He eyed Bella, likely sensing her frustration, and explained. "Just Alice being Alice." Bella let it drop, assuming it was something private between the former couple. Her experiences with Alice had taught her enough to understand that she'd done something for him based on a vision. That bit of insight was enough to satisfy her.

"What did you mean about a cottage?"

"There's a small house on the property for you," he said, nodding towards Mae.

"They don't want us staying with them?" Bella asked, feeling hurt, her mood shifting again in a blink. Did they not want to continue helping her take care of Renesmee? Her compromised and incapacitated state these last few weeks had been a burden to the family. What if they resented her?

"It's to give you a chance to have Mae all to yourself without anyone else trying to steal time with her. You'll always be welcome to spend time here though. Everyone will demand you do at least occasionally each day so they can see her," Jasper explained, relieving her fears. She wondered if he'd felt her concerns or if he already knew her well enough to anticipate her worries. "And I'll be staying there with you - if you don't mind," Jasper added meaningfully.

There was a wealth of implications and questions in the simple statement. He made it clear that the choice was Bella's. That there were a lot of choices she needed to make, and that he'd follow her lead. Somehow she had the sense that she wasn't usually the one in charge of her decisions - at least not without a fight. She wasn't quite sure what to do now that she was.

"Oh," she said, feeling stupid and unable to articulate her thoughts.

"I could show it to you now, and you can see if you even want to stay there," Jasper offered, taking a carefully measured step closer.

"I don't want to leave her," Bella admitted, softly running a finger over Renesmee's rounded, downy cheek. Her daughter's lips smacked gently when she did it. The action, like every other one her daughter had made, had Bella's heart clenching as if trying to beat once again.

It was moments like this that Bella wished she had Jasper's gift so she'd be better able to identify the emotions she was feeling. All she was certain of, was that no human could possibly experience the sheer amount she was to the same degree and survive. It was only thanks to her vampire nature that she didn't burst from the extremes she currently felt.

"She's already sleeping through the night. She'll be out for at least another seven hours, and we should talk - if you're willing," he said, again making it clear that the choice was hers. It was a degree of respect that made him even more impossibly attractive because it went beyond the chiseled cheekbones, sculpted abs, and intense eyes.

"Yes. That's probably a good idea," Bella said.

He approached her, stopping less than a foot away. His eyes were on Mae though, a soft smile gracing his full lips. He touched her clenched fist lightly, making sure not to wake her. Bella's heart swelled at seeing how much he clearly loved her daughter.

"Esme?" he called softly. "Can you watch Mae?" he asked as their mom came into the room. "Rose should be back soon. I'm sure she'll insist on helping you until we return."

"Of course. Welcome to the family, Bella. I hope you like the cottage," Esme said softly.

"I'm sure I will. Thank you, Esme."

Bella handed Renesmee over to her daughter's grandmother then followed Jasper back into the forest. They ran silently through the trees, nerves replacing the playful atmosphere they'd been engulfed in earlier when running through these same enchanted woods.

The soaring sensation of flying through the dense green and brown foliage was more like skipping than running. Next to no time passed between one step and the next, yet the distance was greater than the world record long jump. Bella doubted another animal alive could rivel a vampire in speed or grace.

The novelty of never tiring had yet to diminish even a fraction. Bella's head swiveled around as she watched the passing tree branches so easily dodged. Unnecessary air filled her lungs and part of her mind welcomed the distraction from her nerves and the opportunity to separate out the source of each note coloring the air.

The fairytale cottage came into view all at once nestled into the forest with towering trees ringing it on all sides. Ivy covered the front of the tiny stone structure making it look like it belonged in a storybook. Goldilocks was probably inside sleeping at this very second. A cobblestone path wound through the mossy forest floor up to the ivory door. Pink, yellow, orange, and red tea rose bushes circled the building. Various shaped windows peaked out like mismatched eyes, and curling wisps of smoke disappeared into the evening sky from the chimney on the side of the house. It was so small and quaint, exactly right for her.

Jasper took Bella's hand, threading his fingers between her own and lead her inside. The front room held two overstuffed brown leather armchairs angled towards each other and positioned near a round mahogany coffee table in front of a large fireplace. Bookcases crammed with leather-bound books, family pictures, and nicknacks bordered the fireplace and took up the whole wall. There was a massive arched window on the wall adjacent to the front door with a window seat covered in plush burgundy pillows. A narrow hallway disappeared to unseen parts that made up the rest of the house.

"I can't believe… " Bella's trailed off, turning in a circle to take it all in.

The room was barely big enough for four or five people to visit comfortably. It was a sanctuary. A place for privacy away from the family should she need it. A place for Renesmee to call home.

Bella had always wanted a large family. Specifically, she'd wanted to be part of the Cullen family. Now she finally was. But she was also a mother now, and Jasper was right. A part of her wanted to horde time alone with her daughter. Part of her wanted to savor moments they got to spend together separate from the family. Not all the time - she'd never deny them this opportunity they never expected to have and that they fought for the same way she did - just bits here and there. This place would allow her to do just that.

"The family worked on it while you were away," Jasper said. "They wanted to give you a welcome to the family gift."

He was looking around and taking in everything too. It was enough to have her asking, "Have you not been here yourself?"

"Not since they finished. I've been with you and Mae since you got home from the island," he replied, smiling.

"Thank you," Bella said, remembering all the time she'd spent with him the last few weeks. The time she'd spent getting to know the real Jasper and what an incredible man he was. "For helping me - us."

"Always," Jasper vowed, the promise a caress against her skin as soft as velvet.

"I want you," Bella said. Jasper inhaled sharply. "I mean…"

"You said you don't remember Edward," Jasper rasped, throwing her off track.

"No. Why does that matter?" Bella asked, frustrated to have Edward brought up again. Hadn't Alice already talked to him about this? Bella distinctly remembered hearing that part of the conversation.

"Don't be angry," Jazz coaxed, stepping forward to place a hand low on her hip. It made thinking clearly a thing of the past. "But I have to ask… Would you like to hear about your relationship with him, maybe talk to him and sort things out, then decide what you want?"

"I don't need to. I know what I feel when I'm with you. What I feel when I think about you," Bella insisted, bringing her hands up to rest on his chest. She was rewarded by the feel of him shuttering. She longed to explore the exposed surface, but didn't know how to initiate the intimacy.

"And that is?" Jazz whispered breathlessly. A gilded lock of hair was caught in his sooty lashes and Bella watched each strand shift as he closed his eyes as if savoring the sensation of her touch and anticipating her response.

"Don't you already know?" Bella asked once she'd remembered his question.

"I'd like to hear you say it," Jasper requested, his fingers tugging her closer until their bodies just barely brushed.

"The thought of you helped me through the agony of changing. Then you were there, and your presence pulled me through the very worst of it. You make me feel safe. You make me feel alive. Every atom in my body lights up at just the thought of you. And when you're close, they go into overdrive," Bella confessed, giving him her heart.

"I'm falling in love with you too," Jazz said, smiling softly.

They stood, staring, for eternity. The ability to remain unmoving gave her time to truly appreciate his beauty at her leisure. It gave her time to reveal in the thrill of his declaration. Dust motes floated through the air to settle on their statue poses, neither one even remotely tempted to move.

The moment wasn't perfect though. Jasper made no move to kiss her, and she had a feeling he wouldn't be completely receptive to her making a move to kiss him.

Bella's enhanced vampire senses made it easier to detect his emotions. Her excitement fizzled out like a soda going flat as she sifted through all that Jasper was projecting. Love was there, and it lightened Bella's soul. But that wasn't all she felt from him. Desire. Hesitation. Fear.

Understanding morphed the destination they'd previously been headed towards. They couldn't embrace those feelings until they'd cleared the air.

"Something's holding you back," Bella finally acknowledged. _Please don't say Edward. Please don't say Edward. Please don't say Edward._

"I thought I loved Maria," Jasper said. What? Bella's blinked, startled by the random comment. Bella hadn't expected him to say that. "She was the vampire that changed me," he added, mistaking her confusion. Bella remembered that much, though she didn't say so aloud.

"What happened with her?" she asked instead, curious to hear what he wanted to share about that period of his life. From what she remembered, he rarely mentioned his time with Maria. The subject was very nearly taboo among the family.

"She used me. For nearly a century," he explained, pain and shame lacing the words bitter and deadly as arsenic.

"I wouldn't -"

"I know you wouldn't. You're nothing like her," Jasper said quickly, arms sliding around her back to eliminate any and all remaining distance between their bodies. The buzz of a dozen bee hives made her skin vibrate and hum where their skin connected. "I'm not explaining very well. My gift can be confusing. It makes it difficult to differentiate my emotions from others."

"You're not sure if you want me or if it's just me," Bella voiced, believing she understood what he was trying to say. But Jasper shook his head before she had a chance to feel the impact of her words.

"It's not that. Not really. It's just… I gave them - Maria and Alice - all I had, and in the end… they didn't want me, but I didn't realize it because my emotions clouded things. I'm not sure I'm up for going through it again. If you decide to give Edward another chance somewhere down the road because you learned or remembered something that changed things for you…" Jasper said, leaning his forehead against hers and breathing deeply, inhaling her scent.

Bella mimicked Jasper, basking in the southern summer fragrance, detecting notes of sweet tea and spanish moss for the first time. Overlying that was a touch of butterscotch from the Ponderosa Pine bark they'd leaned against when he'd stopped her from feasting on the humans in the woods.

"You heard Alice. That's not going to happen," Bella denied even as her brain continued sorting through the layers of Jasper's scent.

"I'd feel better if you were better informed before making that decision. It'd be even nicer hearing it firsthand from you instead of basing it on one of Alice's visions. Considering they change when a person makes a new decision… " Jasper explained, then took a deep breath before adding, "Plus he's my brother. I owe it to him after all these years."

Bella weighed his words. She knew she didn't need any more information to make up her mind, her heart had already made the decision, but she wanted to ease his mind. If this was how she did that, she would.

"Will you tell me more about him?" Bella finally agreed. "And how he and I came to have a daughter… " That part she actually was vaguely intrigued about. It seemed nearly mythological given what she remembered about vampires and what little she recalled about Edward. There was no way it had been his decision.

Jasper sighed in gratitude and nodded to the chairs where they settled in. They were more like loveseats. Two people could easily fit, but Jasper chose to sit separately. Be it for space or to look at her more easily, Bella didn't know.

The next several hours were spent relearning everything Bella had forgotten. Jasper didn't spare any details, often describing in full detail not only the situation, but the emotions he detected from Bella, Edward and all the others while it was happening. He shared every memory he had of her time with Edward, and every vision Alice had ever shared with him regarding their relationship. The more he spoke, the more she remembered on her own. But there was a disconnect. The memories were there, but not the emotions. It was like watching it happen to someone else. She had no personal investment in the events.

"Bella?" he finally asked when he realized she was no longer interacting and asking questions about the story he was relating. She picked up on Jazz's anxiety.

"The memories are there. Distorted for sure, but there. It's almost like I'm watching a strange movie that I'm not actually interested in so my mind is spending more time wandering than paying attention. Actually, it's like watching a movie version of a book and ending up hating it for the lack of character development. I don't feel any emotional connection to the memories," Bella explained. Anticipation replaced his nerves.

"Meaning you don't… "

"Suddenly feel the need to live and breathe Edward? No. Definitely not," Bella confirmed.

"And if I were to kiss you right now… " Jasper said, moving to sit beside her.

Bella smiled, and that was all the invitation he needed.

His lips were every bit as electrifying this time as they had been before. Lightning crackled. Sizzled. Popped. Bella pressed closer, trying to bury herself inside Jasper, to leave an indelible mark, a brand, on his soul.

Heat. Velvet. Passion. Chocolate and fur brushing her skin. Melted wax drizzling suddenly over unsuspecting flesh. Soaring through the clouds. A rollercoaster plummeting eighty feet.

It was sensation overload, and Bella was more than happy to surrender to the bombardment. There was no caution. No restraint. No holding back.

"I've been waiting hours to do this again," he murmured into her mouth, not pulling away even to speak clearly. Bella would have protested had he tried to.

Her fingers tangled in his silky soft hair, treading through the curls and tugging his face closer. He came willingly, devouring her mouth with equal fervor. A shutter rocked Bella when Jasper's hand slipped beneath the edge of her borrowed shirt to enclose her upper thigh, his grip a contrasting firm and gentle. All at once he yanked her closer, pulling her to straddle his lap.

"Jazz," Bella moaned, leaning shakely into his chest, excited by the new position.

Jasper's hands slid up and down Bella's thighs in response, occasionally pausing to squeeze when she'd arch into him. Their tongues dueled as hands roamed. Each second a new discovery was made. Miniature earthquakes wracked her frame as her senses went haywire.

Gradually, the wild kiss eased. It gentled from the frantic and desperate tangle to a slow and savoring sipping. It was as if Jasper had come to the realization that they had time. There was no rush, no need to hurry through this moment. They weren't teenagers seeking a quicky before their parents got home from work. They weren't human with finite time dictated by life's busy schedule. They literally had eternity to explore one another. The prospect was something to look forward to.

Bella playfully nipped his bottom lip, and was rewarded with a predatory growl. Lust cascaded pleasantly over her the way a tropical waterfall would feel in a scorching, humid jungle. The emotions were hers, yet she sensed they were being amplified exponentially by Jasper. The effect was staggering.

How was he still in control? It was taking every bit of willpower and tattered shred of modesty Bella possessed to keep her from pushing things further. Only the fact that she sensed his contentment with their current interaction prevented her from attempting to escalate their actions. Embracing his emotions helped her relish the moment more too.

"It's too easy to get lost in that," Jasper said, pulling away sometime later. His eyes were dark with lust, the pupils blown wide.

His head fell to her shoulder with his breathing rapid despite the fact he didn't actually need the oxygen. Bella felt a thrill at knowing she'd so thoroughly shaken his composure.

"Is that wrong?" Bella asked, realizing she was just as undone as him.

"We still need to talk about Mae," Jasper said.

"What about her?" Bella asked. The mere mention of her daughter had Bella longing to see her. How much had she changed during these hours apart? The need to see for herself gnawed at her, a ravenous, demanding beast lodged solidly in her gut. Then another concern presented itself. "Do you not want to be her -"

"I do. So much, Bella," Jazz stated, sincerity ringing clearer than the finest crystal. "While I'm sorry that this will hurt my brother -"

Hadn't they already been through this?

"He chose not to be here," Bella reminded him a tad sharply, the rapidfire shift of emotions catching her off guard, and trickling out before she could get a leash on them.

"Yes, I know," he said, chuckling at her impatience. "I was _going to say_, this might be difficult for Mae. She isn't the typical infant that wouldn't know any better. I'm worried about confusing her," Jasper explained, absently tracing circles on Bella's arm.

"I'm not sure I follow," Bella admitted.

"I'd like to be there for her - as her… well…," Jasper paused to swallow thickly before stating, "as her dad - but she already understands that I'm not actually her father. It's your decision, but I think you should tell her about Edward. Don't try to keep him a secret," Jasper suggested.

"She's a baby," Bella said. She had a while yet before she'd need to worry about Renesmee asking questions or -

"She'll understand. You've already seen how intelligent she is at only a couple days old," Jasper reminded her. He had a point.

"He's not a danger?" Bella quirred, though she'd already figured out the answer based on what Jasper's stories had relayed as far as the type of person Edward was. Things were at the current state because Edward threw a rash and impulsive fit and tried to force things to be his way. Obviously it hadn't worked. Despite that, Bella remembered enough to know Edward would never intentionally harm someone. That just wasn't who he was.

"Never to her," Jasper promised reassuringly.

"I'll think about it," Bella agreed. Even if Mae was highly advanced, nothing needed to be decided immediately. She could spare at least a day to think it over.

Predawn light streaked through the picture window and made the pattern of scars on Jasper's throat glitter faintly. They shimmered like a dusting of powdered glass.

"What is it?" Jasper asked suggestively, a secretive smile twisting one side of his mouth as he felt Bella's shift in mood.

"How much longer do we have until Mae wakes?"

"Probably another hour at most," he answered, grinning ferally.

"Let's stop wasting time then," Bella suggested, tugging on the back of his head to bring his neck close enough for her to lavish kisses on the skin that had so entranced her only moments ago.

* * *

The pair headed back to the main house hand-in-hand. Jasper had stopped her after only a couple minutes, insisting they needed time to change and for him to show her a few things before Mae woke.

"Didn't we visit the cottage so you could change out of my shirt? Doesn't this defeat the purpose?" Jasper asked, picking at the sleeve of the long-sleeved black Henley shirt Bella was wearing. It was his.

They'd finally gotten around to investigating the bedroom. It was decorated in deep stormy blues and greys with silver accents and dark, heavy wood furniture. It reminded Bella of how Jasper had described their kiss as a hurricane. The massive bed was topped with plush pillows and silks and satins. The whole room had a sensual and hedonistic feel to it.

She'd barely spared the room a glance though, taking it all in in an eighth of a second before snatching the shirt in question from Jasper when he'd pulled it from a dresser drawer for himself. He had smiled, shook his head, and pulled a thin sweater out to wear instead.

"I like having your scent around me. It's calming," Bella explained.

"You could always just keep me close," Jasper suggested, pulling her to a stop and twirling her unexpectedly. The quick spin was a move Bella never would have been able to pull off as a human, but as a vampire it landed her gracefully in Jasper's waiting arms.

"I'd rather do both," Bella said, giggling with delight at her new agility.

"That works too," he capitulated easily.

Bella located her daughter the instant she stepped foot inside the house. Mae was still asleep, nestled into her Aunt Rosalie's arms on the couch. Several short coppery curls were sticking out from the blanket bundling the baby. The sight made Bella smile brightly as she quietly approached the pair. She sensed Jasper moving only inches behind her.

Emmett made no attempt to move quietly as he came bounding down the stairs to greet the new arrivals. He leaned over the back of the couch to land a smacking kiss on Rose's cheek, then laughed when he saw Bella. "Did Alice forget to pack clothes for you, Bella, when she relocated Jasper's?" Emmett teased.

The noise from his approach and question was enough to wake Mae. The baby squirmed in Rosalie's arms, and both she and Bella glared at Emmett. He immediately retreated a step, hands raised in surrender.

"Geez, sorry," he muttered.

"I told you that you wouldn't have to wait too long," Jazz murmured, nudging her pointedly.

"Too long for what?" Rosalie asked suspiciously.

Bella looked at Jasper questioningly. Was it really going to be that easy? He nodded to her silent question and replied to his sister. "Emmett to say something provoking. I told her that he'd give her a reason to wrestle him before she had to bring it up."

"You want a go? I'm down!" Emmett called, hopping about like a jacked up rabbit. "You're so gonna get it," he added, laughing and smacking his hands together with a loud crack that had Mae reaching up to silently question Rosalie about the comotion.

"Outside," Esme said sternly, coming into the room with Alice and Seth while Rosalie quietly explained to the baby. Bella hadn't realized Seth was here so early.

"First one to land a hit wins," Jasper announced, drawing Bella's curiosity away from Seth's presence.

"That's too easy," Emmett complained.

"Okay. First one pinned on their back loses," Jasper bargained.

"Doesn't really seem like a fair wager. Didn't you just have Bella on her back?" Emmett joked, heading outside.

"You might want to watch it," Seth suggested, catching sight of Bella's furious glower.

"There's no need to be crude, Emmett. They were just talking," Alice declared. Bella saw her brother's disbelieving smirk as she stepped out the door behind the others amassing on the porch to watch. "Besides, I did warn you that you'd regret teasing her like that. Don't say I didn't warn you!"

Bella made her way slowly down the steps, taking slow breaths to suppress her anger. She didn't actually intend to hurt Emmett - just shut him up for a good long while.

She had barely stepped off the front porch when Emmett charged her. She knew he was running full out, having moved across the yard to throw her off, but her new vision made it possible for her to see every move he made as if in slow motion. Every footfall. Every pump of his sledgehammer arms. Even the unflattering flare of his nostrils as he breathed unnecessarily.

Bella froze, waiting.

Emmett's lips stretched into an anticipatory grin, thinking he had her. A frightened rabbit caught in a glowing ring of headlights.

A split second before Emmett reached her, she sidestepped and ducked to snare his ankles in a strong grip. With a jerk, she flipped him over her shoulder, standing and spinning to look down at his disgruntled expression and sprawled form. Casually, she planted her foot on his chest and pushed with just a fraction of her strength. His body sunk into the damp earth, squishing as easily as a fork through mashed potatoes. The resounding thud his body had made was still echoing around them, bouncing off the trees like a racket ball.

No one moved or spoke as the sound faded into the distance. For a moment, a ninetieth of a second, it was silent. Then everyone burst out in laughter. Emmett was up faster than a strike of an asp.

"You cheated!" he cried. He turned, mouth opening to repeat this accusation to the assembled onlookers, but quick as a whip, Bella's arms encircled his middle and squeezed.

Emmett grunted and strained to break free of her hold. Bella felt the bubble of laughter well up and burst free of her throat - the only thing she allowed to escape.

"_You_ wondered what I'd been up to. Now you know," Bella mocked, looking at Jasper.

"She's a quick study," Jazz agreed, nodding approval.

Bella was surprised at just how right he'd been. Jasper had insisted on showing her the two moves before coming back to the house, vowing they'd come in handy today. Bella hadn't believed she'd be able to pull it off, but Emmett was every bit as predictable as Jazz had promised he'd be. They'd only had to practice a few times before she'd gotten them too. For someone known as a world class clutz, it had been rather gratifying.

"Serves you right," Alice said, crossing her arms and shaking her head hopelessly.

Everyone else began weighing in, but Bella didn't hear them. Renesmee's smile had completely captured her attention. Rose, noticing the baby's distraction, waved Bella over and handed Mae over to her mother.

Mae replayed the fight from her point of view and Bella was thrilled at seeing her own strength and feeling Mae's pride in her mother. It was perfect. The perfect start to the perfect forever. It wasn't possible for Bella to feel more joy than she did at that very moment.

Some distant portion of her brain realized Jasper had taken her place wrestling Emmett, and that Jazz was soundly winning their sparring match. Even Jasper, her chosen partner for the rest of eternity, seemed happier and more integral to the family than her memories indicated he'd ever been previously.

So long as Renesmee stayed safe and healthy, there was nothing more Bella could ever imagine longing for. Her forever, her fairytale life, was laid out before her.

* * *

The family spent the next few days together, joking, playing games, taking turns over who got to help Bella feed or change or entertain Mae. It was the most at ease she'd ever seen the family, at least as far as she could remember. It probably helped that Mae and Seth were the closest to people around during that time, and neither actually smelled like dinner.

The only downside had been learning that her parents had been informed she died. Knowing the final ties to her human life had been severed was… difficult. She'd mentally prepared, of course. But it was still like trying to swallow a horse pill. Water only went so far, and only helped so much. The pill inevitably got painfully lodged in the esophagus anyways.

The funeral had recently ended and the others were expected back any moment. Carlisle, Esme, and Alice had gone with Seth that morning to represent the Cullens, and help Charlie in any way that he'd let them.

The story was that Edward was so devastated that he had refused to come back to Forks for any reason after she'd died. It seemed plausible and no one doubted Charlie would buy the story. Bella hadn't asked too many questions beyond that, reluctant to think about the morbid topic or have it discussed in front of her daughter.

"How bad was it?" Bella finally asked Seth and Alice when they joined her in the living room later that evening. Jasper had taken Mae up to the library to read her a story a few minutes earlier to give Bella a chance to hear how her family was doing.

"The healing process has begun," Alice reassured softly, reaching over to give Bella's hand a squeeze.

"That blond guy from your wedding cried," Seth added, shaking his head. Bella's enhanced hearing allowed her to detect when he muffled a snort.

"Who?"

"Mike," Alice supplied, lips twitching as well. "Mike Newton - never mind, he's not important," Alice finished when she noted a distinct lack of recognition coming from Bella.

And it was true. Her mind was a blank slate as far as the name Mike went. He must not have been important to her as a human. Strange that he would find it in himself to cry over a near stranger like that.

"Was my mom there?" Bella asked instead, forgetting all about Mike once more.

"No. She was upset Charlie insisted on burying you here instead of Florida," Alice explained gently. "Renee did her own memorial at home since she'd just been up here a month ago, and Phil couldn't get more time off work."

"That's probably for the best," Bella said, nodding jerkily. Her mom was already moving on, engrossed in her own life. She'd be all right. "How's Charlie coping?" He was her real concern. Charlie didn't let go easily. He and Bella were just alike in that regard.

"Jake, Billy, and Mom are with him. They'll make sure he's all right," Seth said, smiling reassuringly.

"I'm surprised Jacob didn't try to use today as an excuse to come over here," Bella remarked, not wanting to dwell on her father any longer. What's done was done. No changing things now. He'd be safer without her in his life anyways, and she'd known this part was coming for a while now.

"He was worried about Charlie. You know Jacke sees him as a second father," Seth said.

"I know," Bella grumbled. She couldn't quite remember, but there was a distinct impression of Charlie giving Jacob carte blanche where she was concerned. That would only have happened if Bella's dad truly loved Jake.

"Could be worse," Alice said easily.

"How?" Bella asked incredulously. She was still so perturbed about the imprint she couldn't imagine anything worse than Jacob being in her family just then.

"It could have been Paul," she replied.

"No. That hatred runs too deep," Bella denied. Memories of the wolves and her vampire family were the clearest. The least like viewing through muddy water. Paul's feelings for the Cullens were definitely something she recalled without effort.

"You're probably right," Alice agreed with a breezy laugh.

"You realize he'll eventually be Mae's brother," Seth said suddenly. The surprised realization caused his chocolate eyes to widen comically.

"What? How's that going to work?" Bella asked, looking from Seth to an equally confused Alice.

"Paul and Rachel, Jake and Mae. In-laws, but still," Seth reminded everyone. Looked like the Cullens and pack were destined to forever be entangled. Those family dynamics certainly had the potential to make holidays interesting.

Of course that was assuming Renesmee ended up choosing to be with Jacob.

Bella didn't want to think about Jake someday taking her baby away. Didn't want to picture anyone replacing her as the most important person in her daughter's life. Didn't want to imagine her daughter's future. It was still too new and there was still too much they didn't know.

While Renesmee's growth rate was slowing, it was still happening at an alarming rate. She'd shocked Bella only that morning when she'd spoken for the first time. Not baby gibberish either. No. Mae had spoken clearly and used complete sentences when asking if Grandpa had anymore donated blood she could have since the deer blood Jasper had brought didn't taste as good. Jasper had handled the situation when Bella could do nothing more than stand frozen, mouth clamped shut in terror after being presented with such blatant evidence that Renesmee was maturing too fast. If it didn't -

"'Course we'll likely be brother and sister here before too long," Seth said, yanking Bella abruptly from her musings. The comment was so jarring that approximately ninety percent of her brain refocused on Seth. The remaining ten percent listened to the soothing cadence of Jasper's voice as he read aloud one floor up.

"How's that?" Alice asked sharply, making Seth chuckle.

"My mom and Charlie are getting pretty serious," Seth grinned, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. It was a gesture Bella would bet he'd picked up from Emmett since he'd begun spending so much time at the house.

"Our parents are together? Like _together _together?"

"Oh, yeah. She was helping him deal with your marriage and the fact you're all grown up. Then when you got sick… she was really there for him, you know?"

"I wish… " Bella sighed, trailing off. She didn't need to finish. They all knew the "would have beens" and "could have beens". In the end, this had been her choice, and part of that was learning to adjust.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Alice murmured, leaning her head tenderly against Bella's shoulder.

"Mom has been at Charlie's for about two weeks now - and she's not staying on the couch. I could smell -" Seth added, trying to lighten the mood.

"Don't! Stop! I don't want to know," Bella interrupted, sitting forward so quickly that she dislodged Alice.

"Neither did I, but since I do, I figured you should suffer with me. Leah's not around, so you're it, Sis," Seth teased, punching her shoulder in a very brotherly way. Bella's heart warmed presently. She'd always longed for siblings. The Cullens had given her that gift, but Seth was an unexpected and welcome addition to her growing family.

Alice, eyes squeezed shut and brow wrinkled adorably, growled suddenly. Her shoulders slumped, and she looked accusingly at Seth. "I can't see if you're telling the truth about them getting serious. I can't even see them at all because of you and Leah being so integral to Sue's life."

"Remember what I said about surprises, Alice."

"Hmph. Surprises," Alice groaned, mock shuttering before primly continuing, "I'll always prefer knowing, thank you very much."

"How is Leah?" Bella asked, wondering if the reason she hadn't seen Seth's sister since waking up was because of Renesmee or because she was a vampire now.

"She actually likes Alaska," Seth said, oblivious to Bella's confusion. "I think she wants to stay. It's helping to get some distance from Sam and Emily."

"Is she getting along with the Denalis?" Alice asked, disbelief coloring the question.

"She only talks to Edward. They have a lot in common right now," Seth said, shrugging like the idea of Edward and Leah becoming friends wasn't as strange as picturing a polar bear sunning itself in Fuji.

"Ugh, this is ridiculous. I can't see anything!" Alice announced, throwing her slender arms up in defeat then giving a second frustrated sigh just for good measure. She'd obviously been trying to check on the Denalis and failed thanks to Leah's presence.

Neither of Bella's companions noticed her slowly piecing things together, both too wrapped up in what the other was saying. Leah had gone with Edward to Alaska? Why? She'd have to ask Jazz about that later...

"Poor little pixie," Seth teased, ruffling her hair, and making Alice swat at him. It was more playful than angry though, and Bella realized Alice was having fun… that the two were actually very nearly flirting.

Bella blinked and assessed the two more closely as they continued bantering. Jasper had mentioned something the other day, but now Bella could see what he was referring to for herself. There was definitely something there.

"Go away, pup."

"You wound me!" Seth cried, clutching his chest dramatically and making Alice roll her eyes. Seth stood all the same, backing slowly towards the door with eyes twinkling merrily as he stared down at Alice. "Just know I'm only leaving because I'm hungry, and I don't want all those groceries Esme bought to go to waste."

Alice and Bella sat in companionable silence for some time until Jasper entered. His feline grace capturing Bella's attention with the efficiency of a hunter's snare. His topaz gaze saw nothing but her.

"Would you like to go back to the cottage? Mae can sleep in her room for the first time," Jasper suggested.

"Good luck stealing her away," Bella said lightly, knowing Rose had insisted on taking a few new pictures of her in a new dress she'd happened to have on hand that was the perfect size for Mae this evening.

"I have my ways," Jasper promised, slipping as quietly from the room as he'd entered it.

"Take care of him, yeah?" Alice requested once Jasper left to retrieve their daughter.

"How do you not hate me?" Bella said softly. She'd seen Alice with Seth, but Bella knew she was basically stealing her sister's husband away. There was no possible way things could really be progressing so neatly.

"I could never hate you. I loved him. I always will. But I think I'll love someone else more, and I know he'll love you more. My family means everything to me, and I just want everyone to be as happy as possible," Alice explained, hugging Bella fiercely.

"You're more selfless than anyone I've ever met," Bella remarked, stunned that someone such as Alice could truly exist, and grateful that she was in Bella's life.

"Does this mean you'll go shopping with me whenever I ask?" Alice asked, anticipatory excitement making her bounce on the sofa cushion with the enthusiasm of a child on a sugar high.

"Did I forget to mention that you were also the most manipulative?" Bella huffed.

"A few more months, and you should be fine going to the mall," Alice announced giddily, though to Bella the idea was rather ominous. Perhaps she could figure out a way to stall the obnoxious pixie…


	14. 14: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

I know it was a long wait - again. And that this chapter isn't the greatest… turns out I'm a bit rusty in the writing department. But despite that, completing this chapter reminded me how much I love writing and inspired two new stories I want to write once I finish this one so hopefully I can knock this one out in the next couple months so I can start those :)

PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

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Chapter 14 - Jasper

"Then the Wolf sniffed the smell of the meat, and his mouth watered, and he wished very much to taste. At last he stretched his neck too far over, so that he lost his balance, and fell down from the roof, right into the great trough below, and there he was drowned," Jasper concluded, ignoring the incredulous feelings of his audience as he closed the book after reading the last words of the bedtime story he was sharing with Renesmee.

_Little Red Cap_ had seemed the perfect choice for a little girl that was insistent on being friends with wolves. Like mother, like daughter. And Mae certainly did take after her mother. She was Bella in miniature - stubborn, loyal, forgiving, beautiful… perfect.

And just like her mother, she'd become an integral part of his life in a very short amount of time. He'd be incomplete without the two. The Cullen family shadow. A transparent ghost - insubstantial and only partially realized. Lingering. Perhaps unwanted. An afterthought.

But with them… well… he had purpose. Passion. A future worth looking forward to.

And in just a few more minutes he'd be with Bella again. The desire to be by her side tugged at him insistently, a pull he felt down to the venom-replaced marrow of his bones. He ached to touch her, despite having been by her side not even two hours ago. He'd never get enough of her.

"Papa, that would never actually ha-a-a-ppen," Mae said, yawing through the last word. Her rosebud mouth stretched wide before clamping quickly shut as if to hide the physical evidence of her drowsiness.

It was over an hour after she usually went to bed, but Auntie Rose hadn't been able to say no when Mae had asked her to paint her nails with the new silver glitter polish her Auntie Alice had gotten her. Then every member of the family had to admire the handiwork. Perhaps this was why Bella had initially bulked at the idea of him settling down Mae without her this evening. And here he was thinking she'd just be missing her daughter...

Major Jasper Whitlock - soldier turned marshmallow.

Like he was of those candy peeps people ate around Easter.

He wouldn't have it any other way.

This was the first night Bella had even relinquished performing Mae's bedtime ritual since waking and getting Mae settled into their cabin. Actually, it was her first time not being where her daughter was sleeping since her first night awake when Rose had kept Mae so that they had a chance to talk. Bella had struggled with leaving her tonight all day, but eventually she'd recognized the importance of her daughter having experiences that didn't involve her mother hovering and smothering her with constant attention. Mae deserved to establish a little independence the same way Bella had in order to grow into her own person. In the end, Bella had only retired to the cottage early because she knew Jazz would be the one tucking her little girl in - at Mae's request.

At less than a week old the little one could utter complete sentences. So at a little over a month old, as she was now, it was hardly worth batting an eye to hear her state an opinion. The first time she spoke had been a shock for everyone, most of all Bella - so much that he'd had to answer Mae's questions since Bella had gone temporarily mute - but now it was fairly common for Renesmee to speak. Though Mae did seem to prefer using her gift most of the time when she wished to communicate. She liked forming that connection when she wished to share her thoughts.

He felt her amusement amongst her sleepiness as she waited to see if he'd disagree with her, and had to swallow against the tight knot that formed in his throat every time - _every single time_ \- she so casually called him papa.

That had started a couple days after Bella woke and there hadn't been any discussion about it - not about how he wasn't biologically her father or how she had another father in Edward. Mae had simply decided he was hers and started calling him that.

Bella had agreed that they would be upfront with Mae, but she wanted to wait until things settled down. Jasper disagreed, but ultimately it was her decision. They'd compromised by agreeing to talk to Mae if Mae asked about Edward directly or if he ever decided to come back. Considering the number of pictures of Edward that Esme still had around the house and the obvious resemblance between the two, Jazz was betting she'd bring it up before too long.

Besides, there just hadn't been time. The family was frantically trying to give her a normal childhood while also researching what to expect or places to seek others like Renesmee. It was a problem the family hadn't found any solutions to yet, despite their fervent searching. And in the meantime, Mae continued to make developmental advancements at alarming rates. They were racing through all of the milestones, each barely registering before the next occurred, and there just weren't many opportunities to stir up additional trouble.

Time wasn't on their side.

And no one wanted Mae to spend a moment of the priceless seconds they had discussing a topic that might in any way hurt his daughter.

He hoped she'd continue to see him as her papa even after she learned the complete truth of Edward. It was a gift he had no intention of relinquishing now that it was his. Although he was willing to share it. Hell. He owed Edward. Owed him in ways that couldn't be repaid. Edward was the reason Mae even existed at all. Bella may have done all the real work to ensure Mae survived, but you couldn't discount the role Edward's fertility played. Lack of use hadn't hindered his potency, and that deserved kudos.

Recovering quickly from the emotional stranglehold her endearment had had on him as well as his dark worries, he asked, "Why not?"

She may have been only weeks old in reality, but she looked more like a three-year-old, and behaved more like a ten-year-old more often than not. He couldn't wait to hear her reasoning in this case.

"Wolves aren't clumsy," she stated matter-of-factly. "Jake and Seth could easily jump off a roof, land on their feet, then fight over the food. Even if one of them did get hurt, they'd heal right away. Besides - they're great swimmers. Jake said he'd teach me tomorrow if the water was calm enough."

Jasper fought back a laugh at her critique of the famous Grimm fairytale. "That's true enough. But this is just a story, poppet. Not all wolves are as nimble and resilient as _your_ wolves. Now it's time for you to get some sleep."

"One more," she begged, blinking slowly up at him with liquid chocolate eyes that struggled to remain open at all.

He could grant her wish, but he knew that if he did, she'd just request yet another story afterwards. Mae had already grown to hate bedtime, fearing she'd miss out on something interesting since the rest of her family didn't sleep. Sad as it made her, it was harder for the rest of them to be confronted with the evidence of her overnight changes when she woke each morning only a few hours later. How many more mornings could possibly be left at this rate?

"The sooner you go to sleep, the sooner morning will seem to come," Jasper coaxed, hiding his concern from the perceptive child watching him. The promise of the adventures awaiting her in the morning were tempting indeed.

It was the reason she was staying at the main house instead of her room at the cottage with Bella and Jasper. Today was Friday. And Friday nights meant having a sleepover at her grandparent's house with the rest of the family since Jake and Seth would come around first thing in the morning to steal her away to La Push to spend Saturday morning at Sam and Emily's house. The senior alpha pair had begun hosting a weekly brunch for pack members, imprints, and a few others including Sue Clearwater and Billy Black. The weekly gatherings were a way for the two packs to intermingle and remain close. A way to mend fences and maintain an alliance. Also, they served to reinforce the foundation of why the pack existed in the first place - to protect their home and families.

Saturdays were Jake's weekly time with Mae, and he usually took her to spend the day with the packs so she could see everyone at once. It was good for her to socialize with people outside of the immediate Cullen family. Mae loved spending time with all the wolves. And with her accelerated aging, no one had the heart to deny her any experience she wanted. Who knew how long she'd have to do the things she loved?

On top of that, Billy's health wasn't the best, so Bella had agreed that it was important for Mae to get to know him now, while she could. Especially since she couldn't get to know her own Grandpa Charlie.

That was a matter that thankfully hadn't come up again since Bella's change and Jasper was hoping Mae wouldn't think to bring it up until he'd thought up a possible solution. Not that he really thought there was one. So far he was at a loss. Perhaps it wouldn't matter if they still ended up moving the following summer like they were currently planning on, and he wouldn't need to worry about it at all.

Jasper watched Mae's face scrunch adorably as she continued debating, her emotions playing tug-of-war, and he couldn't contain his chuckle any longer. The little girl grinned and reached to touch his hand. An image flashed in his mind of himself tucking the lavender covers, hand-embroidered with flowers, tighter around her before turning out the lights. It was followed with an image of Bella and the strong desire for him to tell her Momma goodnight for her.

Proceeding to follow her instructions, Jasper reached to tuck a stray curl behind her ear and kiss her rosy, warm cheek goodnight before shutting the door to her room - formerly Edward's room.

Esme had redecorated, moving Edward's belongings to the garage after the first night Mae had asked to sleep over. Jasper felt her pain, longing, nostalgia, and regret the entire time Esme had boxed up her eldest son's treasured possessions. She hadn't hesitated though. Something told him Alice had already warned her that Edward had no intention of returning anytime soon. Jasper still couldn't believe he was voluntarily missing out on Mae's life. Nothing could keep him away now that she had wormed her way so deeply into his heart.

"Wasn't that story a little morbid for bedtime?" Rosalie asked, drumming her perfectly manicured nails on the kitchen table. Jasper absently noted that she was wearing the same silver glitter polish that she'd done Mae's nails in. The measured clicking kept time with his steps as he descended the steps to join her, Alice, and Carlisle where they were pouring over some new books Esme had found earlier that day. "Not that there's anything wrong with teaching her that wolves are evil and should be killed," she added almost as an afterthought.

"She's a vampire hybrid, Rose," he chuckled, shaking his head. "A little death and gore is hardly going to phase her."

Rose sniffed, "I'm sure Bella will agree with me."

"Speaking of," Jasper smiled, "I should be getting back to her."

"Someone's hoping to get lucky tonight," Emmett teased, tossing a basketball from one hand to the other. He and Seth had spent each night this last week devising a new version of the traditional ball game that involved an obstacle course on the court, and baskets mounted on trees fifty feet up in the air and hidden by branches. They were supposed to try it out sometime soon.

Jasper didn't bother to acknowledge the comment, but he caught Alice's eye. She shooed him out with an encouraging smile and a sly wink. Every day their transition into friends became more natural.

And that wink…

Tonight would be his first real opportunity to spend a substantiation amount of uninterrupted time alone with Bella since their first night in the cabin when they'd started things. So much for Alice letting them discover what would happen as it occurred. She'd just given him the green light.

"Well it certainly isn't you, Emmett," Alice piped in. "Esme saw the platform you built out back and wants it moved by morning. She has a delivery for work coming first thing and the driver will ask questions. It looks like a torture device."

Jazz took the out and slipped outside before anyone else took the opportunity to comment on his developing relationship. Bella was still rather uncomfortable with the entire family knowing every detail of her life or how they enjoyed weighing in on each decision. Some things never changed.

The cool night air parted like the Red Sea for him as he bolted through the trees. A worn path was already forming through the trees. It was expected given the number of times they'd traversed the same course this last month. Damp earth hardly had time to squish beneath his feet before he was launching forward, propelling himself home where his version of a fairytale waited. A version far happier than any dreamt up by Disney, and infinity preferable to those told by the Grimm brothers.

Anticipation. It strummed his nerves like a musician expertly playing a guitar.

Bella and he had gotten into a routine the past few weeks since Mae's birth. Days were centered around being parents to Mae. While most nights Jasper and Bella would spend hours watching Mae sleep. It was fascinating and enthralling just to marvel at her breathing and know that she was a precious gift. Their very own sleeping beauty.

Eventually, they would retire to the living room to spend a couple hours together. Never long enough. Time really was against him. But then, he could spend a thousand years with her and he'd still crave more. There was just so much to learn, so many nuances they'd yet to discover about one another.

At least they talked until neither could resist the mounting sexual tension. At which point Jasper used every ounce of control he possessed to keep from tearing Bella's clothes off and gorging himself on her. Instead, he settled for hungry kisses and exploratory touches that left both wanting more, but unsure how to proceed to a deeper level of intimacy with a nosy family examining their every move, knowledge of their previous relationship failures, and a child in the next room bound to wake up the moment things really started heating up - she was a ridiculously light sleeper and only slept a total of five hours a night if they were lucky.

Punishment. It had to be. Or perhaps it was just a way to balance out his incandescent happiness.

Tonight would be different though. They were finally alone. They finally had time. They were finally in a good place to begin a sexual relationship.

This - Bella and him - was forever. He _knew_ it. He _felt_ it. The ties binding them were near tangible. They were certainly unbreakable. So he knew they had to go about doing things right. That meant learning each other and growing together. Plunging headlong into things wasn't necessary - even if the anticipation was driving him out of his ever-loving mind. Their time together during her pregnancy, the last few weeks of living together and near constant interactions combined with their vampire natures had readied them for this. It was time to take things further.

Tonight.

Besides, Jasper knew Bella's sexual history. Sex was significant to her. An act that shouldn't be rushed or engaged in simply because hormones and mutual desire were pushing for it. _And man were they pushing. _ For Bella there needed to be a lasting emotional bond so the act was a manifestation of those feelings. He wanted to give her enough time to know for certain that was what they had.

He had Edward to thank for needing to help her see things with him were different. Bella had only ever been with Edward, and thanks to Jasper's need for Bella to remember her past, she did. She remembered sleeping with Edward only for him not to want to be with her again. Talk about giving a girl a complex. That rejection had lead to some insecurities and self-consciousness that she hadn't realized existed until the first time they'd started taking things further.

He'd felt her sudden ball of uncertainty and anxiety. Her unexpected fear had blindsided him. It'd been persistent enough to give him pause and have him questioning her. Bella had needed a little prodding to open up, but once she had, they'd both agreed her past needed addressing before they had sex. They'd discussed what she remembered and feared a few times. They'd talked until it was something they'd worked through as much as they could until he simply proved things would be different by letting her discover for herself that they were.

And for Jasper, sex had always been an addiction. He craved the pleasure. Hungered for it till he was shaking with the need. But he wanted sex with Bella to be about more than simply finding a release or obtaining his next fix. He didn't doubt it would be. She already inspired a whole new range of far sweeter emotions within him. They were emotions he'd only ever experienced vicariously. Now he could finally obtain them for himself.

It was important to Jasper that sex not be a hang up in their relationship. Not the way it had been for her and Edward, or for him and Alice, or even for him and Maria. He craved passion and physical affection too much and wanted to make sure Bella would too.

So between Alice's knowing wink, and Bella teasingly mentioning she was wearing a gift from Rose before she headed to the cottage, the time had come.

Slipping silently into the house, Jasper found Bella engrossed in a book. It wasn't an unusual occurrence. But he tasted her emotional climate and found wistfulness. What was she reading?

His registering of her emotions must have set off some signal that alerted her to his presence because he hadn't moved, yet Bella was jerking up and hastily stuffing the book between the cushion and arm of the seat she was curled up in in the cottage. She looked like a cat with the way her legs were tucked beside her on the leather chair.

"What are you doing?" Jasper asked, stalking closer. Her desperate attempt to hide the book completely sidetracked his previous mission to finally have his way with her. Vampires were easily distracted, after all. And they did have all night to get back to that.

"Nothing!" Bella squeaked. Jazz could envision her blushing had she still been human and was once again grateful that he didn't have to resist the temptation it would have presented. Vampire Bella was much better suited to him - not to mention much happier with herself.

Bella's obvious attempt to hide whatever she'd been reading intrigued him. He approached slowly, savoying the way her eyes raked over him.

"Mae wanted me to tell you goodnight," he said, hoping to distract her from his true purpose.

"Did she put up a fight?" Bella asked, distracted and breathless. She'd stopped breathing when he entered and as the last word left her lips, she inhaled deeply. Jasper felt her appreciation increase. He liked how well she enjoyed using her newly enhanced senses around him. Liked how they made her want him more - the opposite reaction most of their kind had.

"No," he said, bending to capture her lips.

Bella's mouth was soft, pliable, as he swept his tongue lazily over her plump bottom lip before sucking it between his own and nipping lightly. She gasped, arching up towards him, her body seeking more contact with his as he sampled her. Need surrounded him and he basked in the heady emotion.

With ease, Jazz leaned down, bracing his hands on either side of her hips as he slipped his tongue gently into her mouth. At once her arms rose to encircle his neck. Fingers carded into his wildly curling hair when he deepened the kiss, drinking the offered ambrosia. Desire wafted from him, overflowing the dam he maintained to hold his feelings.

Jasper waited until the moment he felt Bella's hand turn to steel locked in his hair, securing him to her before he slipped his hand lower. Lower. Into the tiny gap.

Success! Before she had a chance to stop him, Jasper yanked the book free.

"No fair!" Bella cried, detangling her hands and scrambling up to try and snatch the mysterious book back before he had a chance to read the cover. He sensed her trepidation and nerves as they fought over the leather bound novel, but there was anticipation too so he turned the cover enough to see the gilded scroll of the title engraved on the spine.

Surprise ghosted through the room on a chilling breeze bringing whispering echoes of long forgotten memories. The pop, pop, pop of gunfire. The merry beat of instruments playing a reel. Death rattles of ill and dying soldiers. Naive cheers of boys playing at things they didn't understand.

Bella stopped trying to retrieve the book, accepting defeat and waiting to see his reaction.

"_Gone with the Wind_?" Jasper finally read aloud, the title coming out as a question.

"It depicts the kind of life you lived, right?" Jazz felt a thirst emanating from Bella. One fueled by him. It was different from the type he'd felt these last few weeks during their stolen nights. This went deeper than carnal passion. "I know I usually read books set around the turn of the century, but this seemed like a good choice to learn more about the time you were human, and I saw it in the library at the house so I grabbed it."

"You want to know about my human life?" They'd discussed his life and memories of being a vampire at length recently, but never his time as a human. Only how he'd become a vampire and that he'd had a sister. Nothing more.

"Of course. I want to know your past. Your present. Human life. Vampire soldier life. Cullen life. Future you. All of it. Everything."

Alice hadn't remembered her human life, and it hadn't been until they met Bella, and later James, that she'd become curious enough about it to seek answers. It was while they were in Mississippi just last fall that she'd asked about his life prior to being turned. She'd not even known about his rank and participation in the Civil War till then. She'd just known he'd been a soldier in the southern wars for Maria. It hadn't struck him as odd at the time. Alice was all about the future, not the past. Her gift had shaped that facet of her being. But now it seemed glaringly obvious that they weren't meant to be together. If they had, she'd have wanted to know about him long before then.

"Where would you like to start?" Jazz asked, settling into the chair and pulling Bella onto his lap. She went willingly, nestling into his arms as if they fit like puzzle pieces destined to be joined.

This wasn't the intimacy Jasper had sought when he'd left the main house minutes ago, but it was equally precious and coveted. And somehow, sharing it with Bella made the past a welcome place to revisit rather than the painful memory it'd been when he'd been ensnared by Maria.

"Was your life like the gentlemen depicted by Mitchell?" Bella asked, slipping her fingers between his. He gripped her hand more firmly, briefly squeezing it.

"Not really. I don't remember much, but I know my family owned a cattle ranch," he said, digging into his murky mind. The past was there, just coated in layers of dust so thick no amount of polishing would ever fully remove the texture grime from the surface, try as he might. So much had faded, a photograph or letter abandoned outside, too exposed to last. If he tried too hard to see it, it'd crumble to bits and vanish altogether.

"Owned?" Bella repeated, understanding the significance owning versus working a ranch would have had during that era.

"It was small," he said, struggling to recall the color of the shutters. The house had been white - he remembered that much at least. Though it looked more tan from all the dust and dirt most of the time. Except after the heavy rains. Blue maybe? Green? He couldn't remember…

"Your family?"

"I only remember my sisters. My older one died of a fever when I was... nine, maybe? It was fast. She was fine one day then… she wasn't." He sighed. She'd been beautiful, all golden curls, grace, and charisma just like him. He remembered ranch hands falling all over themselves to dance with her at parties, her constant laughter and smile, but he couldn't remember her name. "I don't remember her name. She died years before I was turned," he admitted sadly.

Bella kissed his neck softly, feelings of sympathy and love misting him like a gentle cleansing rain. "Did you ever look into what happened to Margaret?"

"No. I don't want to know - in case it was awful. I'd rather imagine she married well and all her dreams came true." It was unlikely, but there was nothing to be done about it now. She'd probably died long before he left Maria. No sense taking on any additional guilt now for failing to properly look out for her. He already had more than he could handle as it was.

"Where was your ranch?" Bella asked, blessedly redirecting the conversation towards more neutral ground.

"About eighteen miles northeast of San Antonio on horseback," Jasper said, verbalizing the fact without pause. He was surprised he remembered so precisely where it'd been. He'd not thought of it until he'd already said it aloud.

"Horseback?" Bella asked, latching onto the fact with acute interest.

"Better than a buggy," he chuckled, backside aching at the mere thought.

"I think I'll stick with cars," Bella replied lightly, appreciation for modern technology - in particular modern modes of travel, shining through clearly. "Or running."

"Horses aren't so bad," Jasper said lightly.

"You miss riding," Bella replied, picking up on his fondness and nostalgia more than he'd expected. But then, she'd gotten very good at reading him.

"I do actually," Jazz admitted, running his fingers absently over Bella's side and appreciating the way she shivered in response.

"Did you have your own horse?"

"Yes," Jasper said at once, laughing when a barrage of memories returned, smacking him as suddenly as a drink shucked in his face by an angry lover. "He was an ornery cur. My pa made me work with him for hours each day till he was tame enough to ride out over our spread on. I can't tell you how many times he kicked or bucked me off his back. But he was mine. He was all black, sleek, powerful. I got him when I was seven. A neighboring ranch bought him, but he was too wild. They were going to kill him when I talked them into giving him to me instead." The words came tumbling out, a rushing geyser spoken a half step before the actual memory materialized in his mind.

He was saddened by the realization that he recalled his horse more than his family, but he was grateful all the same for the retrieval of events that had helped shape him and had once meant so much to him.

"Of course you did, as charismatic as your gift makes you. You must have been irresistible as a child."

"People had a hard time saying no to me," he agreed.

"What was your horse's name?" Bella inquired, cocking her head like a curious kitten.

Jasper paused, searching the cobweb-filled attic of his memory. "Atlas," he finally declared. "After the Greek titan because of his strength."

He looked for more, dredging further into the recesses of the past, but all he found was darkness. Maria had scrowered out the rest. Replaced it with bloodlust. Bloodlust and the pain of fulfilling orders even when it meant experiencing his victims' pain.

"What else do you remember?" Bella asked, after a lengthy pause, trying to redirect his thoughts, much to his relief.

"A lot of riding, sweat, and rough work," he finally said, thinking of long days in the saddle with the sun blistering his neck when he forgot a cloth to cover it. There weren't any other concrete details to mention.

"So I should be reading a western romance?" she asked drolly, her fingers idly tracing the back of his hand. A spike of lust betrayed her genuine interest at the idea.

"Why settle for reading?" he breathed, mind returning to his initial plans for the evening and the feel of her changing emotions. Perhaps Bella's mind was in sync with his own.

"We are alone for hours yet," Bella acknowledged, biting her lip and glancing up at him enticingly. It made Jasper long to be the one biting it. "Maybe we should make use of this time for other things," Bella suggested, raising her hand to rest on his chest, just over his silent heart.

"Why, Ms. Cullen, I do believe you're trying to seduce me," Jasper drawled, deliberately thickening his accent. Playful. Mischievous. Bella's feelings encouraged him to continue the joke.

"I wouldn't dare suggest… but... is it working?" she asked, tipping her head back. A delighted smile quirked the edges of her lips while her fingers tugged deliberately at a button on his shirt.

"I have a reputation to uphold," he whispered, leaning down until their lips just barely brushed as he spoke, soft as a flower petal.

"I assure you my intentions are honorable," she promised, briefly sealing her lips to his, unable to resist.

"Are they truly?" he asked, wondering how much of what she was saying was just playful banter.

He trusted her to know what she wanted. He wouldn't second guess her or attempt to influence her. Bella was an adult that knew her own mind. That was one of the most significant hurdles they'd discussed these last few weeks in their efforts to help her move past her history with Edward. Bella was in charge of Bella. No one else had that right, nor would she let someone else have that power again.

Jasper nudged the tip of her nose with his as he waited for her reply.

"Well, I won't be proposing, but I am offering forever starting now," Bella vowed, sincerity flowing out to encircle him. Her words were exactly what he needed to hear just then.

"Then consider me seduced," he replied seriously before truly kissing her, all teasing set aside now.

With ease he scooped her into his arms, never once breaking their kiss, and carried her into the bedroom. Since their first night in the house, they hadn't been in the room together at the same time. It was as if by some unspoken agreement they'd decided to avoid temptation until they were both ready for this next step and had the time to properly enjoy it.

And now the time had finally come. No more distractions.

Jasper felt Bella's hands unfastening the buttons on his shirts he walked, her fingers ghosting over the skin revealed in their wake, her nails lightly scratching, addicted to the resilient softness of vampire skin. A shiver coursed through him as he set her on the edge of the bed.

Breaking the kiss, he straightened, standing before Bella. She eyed him hungrily. He felt every ounce of her desire. It was potent. An aphrodisiac the likes of which he'd never known. She wasn't repulsed by his scars. She didn't instinctively fear him the way others of their kind did. She saw him. _Really saw him - the good and the bad._ And still she loved him. After a moment, he shrugged the open shirt off, fully exposing the truth of his past to her accepting gaze.

A turbulent tempest, wild as the sudden summer storms he'd grown up with washed over him. It was chaotic, confusing, consuming. It was the full depth of his emotions, and it would take an eternity to sort through all of the different feelings. But it was everything Bella made him experience, and she was experiencing the same. Luckily she'd just offered him exactly that long so he'd have time to unravel all that she made him capable of feeling.

Bella leaned forward, lightly kissing one of his scars on the left side of his rib cage while her fingers traced another nearby half-crescent bite mark. Shutters wracked his frame so hard his knees almost gave out.

Eight. Four. One. Two. He'd been in his eighth year as a vampire when he received the bite in Sabinas, Mexico. He'd killed four newborns that night. He'd been bitten once. He'd drunk two humans as a reward for his triumph that night.

Bella kissed another mark on his right bicep.

Thirty-nine. Three. Two. Zero. He'd been in his thirty-ninth year as a vampire when he received the bite in Montemorelos, Mexico. He'd killed three newborns that night. He'd been bitten twice. He'd drunk no one that night as punishment for his soldiers' defeat. Those were the first two bites he'd received in over five years. He'd gotten cocky, believed he was untouchable in battle. It'd been a memorable wake-up call.

He remembered the details of every scar immortalized on his body. They'd never fade. There was no removing them. And his mind meant he'd never forget. They'd always represented something. Proof of his skills and remembered pain when he'd been with Maria. Then shame once he'd joined the Cullens and learned others didn't live that way. Occasionally they were useful - ways to deter potential threats to his family. But tonight Bella was making them represent love and acceptance. The same way she'd done during her first hunt with the few scars she'd kissed then. She was ensuring he received nothing but pleasure from the sensitive marks.

One day he'd share every indelible detail his body recorded with her. But not tonight.

The angel before him continued her quest, seeming determined to replace the horrors of battle associated with each scar with something infinitely more desirable. He basked in her attentions, needing more - desperate for it to never stop.

When she finished with the last one possible to reach in her current position, she sat back, bringing her legs up onto the bed in a kneeling position that brought her higher up, face closer to his. But when she leaned forward to continue her journey, Jasper stayed her progress with a gentle hand. No words were needed when they could simply feel what the other wanted and needed. She'd healed him enough for one night. Erased enough of his suffering. Now it was his turn to explore her. Now he needed to feel her or the suffering would intensify again for different reasons altogether.

Jasper ran a long finger down the length of her shirt, right down the middle, and watched as the torn edges fell open to reveal porcelain perfection, the brown cotton fabric no match for vampire strength.

Desire welled to a fever pitch as he admired the ivory skin of her rounded breasts pushed high and threatening to spill out of the black lace bra she wore. The contrast between her fair skin and the stark black of the scalloped edge snagged his attention. The fancy scrap of cloth was definitely not something Bella would have ever thought to buy herself. He'd have to thank his sister later for thinking to supply her with such a thoughtful gift - thoughtful for him at least.

Slowly, achingly so, he leaned forward to line his lips up with the base of her throat. Bella's head tilted back as unnecessary breaths sounded from her mouth in short, ragged pants. He felt the rapid rise and fall of her greedily gulped air as he trailed open-mouthed kisses down her chest, pausing to trace his tongue over the mound of her breast right along the edge of her bra. Her shallow breaths became irregular when he teased the tip of each erect nipple with a fleeting flick of his tongue before he kissed lower, a blazing line down to her navel.

"Jazz," Bella gasped, clenching her hands into fists in his hair. She tugged experimentally, trying to guide him back to her breast, but he didn't budge in his quest. Newborn strength coursed through her body, but she didn't use it against him, trusting him to know how to pleasure her instead.

With each kiss, he made the conscious effort to tear down the concrete fortress sealing his emotions away. The ever-present dam he'd used to block his secrets from the world. From his family. From the people he'd loved and those he'd only thought he loved. He'd let leaks through before, sometimes even on purpose, but he'd never let his defenses down completely - at least not willingly. He was now. Each press of his lips removed another block and opened the spillway more until his emotions were an unhindered flood rushing directly to Bella.

She gasped when the full extent of his feelings washed over her. Jazz immediately pulled away to search her face, needing to know she could withstand the full brunt of his feelings. "I want to feel everything you're feeling. Give me everything. Don't hold back," she said, instinctively knowing he needed to hear her verbal acceptance of him. To have that confirmation of what he was sensing from her.

So he did. Him in his entirety the way he'd never given himself to another.

"No, darlin, I won't ever hold back with you," Jasper vowed, relieved that she wanted all of him driving him on.

Emotions flowed like water onto a beach, giving and taking with every gently lapping wave. Hands danced, tracing curves and planes, mapping undiscovered areas, cupping, squeezing, caressing.

Bella's body was a work of art. Bearing a child, however mystically and briefly, had enhanced her curves just enough that she'd finished maturing into a woman's body rather than a teenager's. It would take millenia to fully appreciate her perfection.

Jasper's head fell back in mindless ecstasy when Bella licked and sucked at the scars on his neck. The most sensitive place on his body. The action had him groaning and aching for more, particularly when her hands danced over his back, nails digging and scraping when his own exploring hands hit a particularly sensitive area near Bella's hip.

Arching her back, Bella rocked her hips against Jasper, pressing her center tightly against his hardness. The friction spurred him on, demanding he seek out more. Clamoring for full skin to skin contact. No barriers. No interruptions. No stopping.

He felt it. They both wanted, _needed_, everything - _now_.

"Mmmh, Bella," he moaned, pulling his hips back and reaching to free the button on the jeans she wore. The thin metal turned to playdough, squeezing through his fingers with the ease of toothpaste.

He tossed the useless blob aside and tugged the remaining fabric down. A tearing sound filled the air, alerting him to the irreparable damage he was doing to her clothes. Hopefully she wasn't attached to that particular pair of pants. He had a feeling they were beyond salvageable at this point.

Hastily, Jasper pulled away from Bella to eliminate the remains of her shredded clothes as well as his own. Absently he wondered what the matching underwear had looked like against her skin. He'd have liked to have that image seared into his mind for eternity. But there was more lingerie. He'd have other other chances with other sets.

The fleeting thought was there and gone by the time he'd finished and Bella was tugging him back to the bed to join her. He went easily into her waiting arms, settling fully onto her and into the v of her parted thighs.

"Mmhhh," he sighed, relishing the contact. The brush of impossibly smooth skin, silkier than satin, against his torso. Appreciating the zings of pleasure and sparks of desire igniting every place their bodies connected.

Hands continued journeying over one another, grasping and squeezing. An inferno raged. Temperatures rose steadily. Bella stroked his length, gripping him firmly when he dipped the tip of his finger into her slick opening, working it slowly in and ever so slowly back out, tantalizing her.

"I love you," she whispered into his ear, making his fingers briefly spasm uncontrollably as they traced the entrance of her core before slipping back in.

He didn't need to hear the words. Bella's love for him filled the room, comforting as a security blanket, and strong enough to feed the starving blaze overtaking them.

Rather than echo her words, Jasper willed her to feel the true extent of his love for her. An unspoken affirmation.

Bella's legs encircled his hips at once, pulling him as close as possible, and her hands slipped from between them and around to grip his shoulders. Drugging kisses proceeded when her lips captured his in response.

"Jazz," Bella gasped into his mouth, his name a command disguised as a plea when he rubbed the little bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs a final time.

Ecstasy slammed into him, sending him soaring to the same heights just by feeling her climax. Lights danced and flashed around them. Literal fireworks only his vampire eyes allowed him to witness. His body shuttered helplessly as she clung to him.

"Aaah, more," Bella begged.

At once immensely grateful for vampire recovery time - it was wonderful never getting tired - he didn't disappoint, replacing his finger with his length and easing into her as though coming home for the first time ever. Once he was fully inside her he paused. It felt right. The most right he'd ever felt in his life. True peace. True pleasure.

Bella didn't give him long to ponder the sensation as he felt her impatience willing him to move. Seeking friction and a continuation of what they'd just sampled.

A maelstrom of desire encircled them. An endless feedback loop. Sensation and emotion. One fed the other. An ouroboros refashioned out of bliss. Time ceased. The world fell away. Nothing existed apart from them.

Tension built. Higher and higher. A rocket shooting for the stars. Then...

Supernova.

The implosion of a star.

That was the only way to calculate the sheer magnitude of the indescribable euphoria he found in making love to Bella. A bomb couldn't compare. Didn't come close. A nuclear reactor meltdown was a simple kiss in comparison.

The frantic pace he'd set slowed, easing them down from the highest high he'd ever had. Their gazes locked and he felt that she was with him entirely. He'd certainly let her feel it with his gift.

For long moments they basked in one another, unmoving. Connected. Two parts of a whole. This night had fulfilled every touch-starved wish and desire he'd ever had.

"Your gift is incredible. I felt as though we were truly one," Bella murmured against his neck, "that it was more than a physical act."

"Our souls joined," Jazz said, believing in the transcendent quality of the time they'd just spent together.

He felt a slight jolt of a frustrated, elusive struggle from Bella then she relaxed, letting go of whatever fleeting memory his words had triggered.

"I think you're right," she said, snuggling closer. If he could pull her inside himself he would. Since he couldn't, he settled for wrapping his arms tightly around her and cocooning her in his feelings of love and joy.

It didn't last long.

A trailing finger was all it took to spark his desire once more. Mirrored emotions greeted him.

He rolled them, sitting up as he did so that Bella was in his lap, legs wrapped snugly around his hips. Bella rocked against him, eagerly taking the lead as she sought the bliss they'd found minutes earlier.

Vampire recovery time really was incredible.

Jasper took advantage of their new position to lean down and feast on Bella's breasts. Her back arched invitingly, presenting her budded nipples like an offering for him to savor.

Over and over they came together, bodies joined in a physical manifestation of their feelings for one another. One body ended where another began, mimicking their emotions.

Endless.

"Please don't ever stop," Jasper murmured into her neck at one point, squeezing her tightly as their hips met frantically.

Bella's soundless response was an earth shattering kiss that left him reeling.

* * *

Hours later afternoon light was filtering in through the window when they heard the sound of heartbeats nearing quickly. One was a slow thudding, heavy and large. The other, a faster thrumming like swiftly beating wings. Twigs cracked and birds rustled in branches before taking flight. The pair were running towards the cottage.

A single exchanged glance had Bella and Jasper both up and rushing to dress. In eight seconds the pair were decently presentable and hurrying outside to greet Mae and the unwelcome arrival of her wolf protector.

The little girl immediately ran to Bella, bronze ringlets bouncing like slinkies. She launched herself, flying through the air once she got close enough. Bella caught her mid leap, scooping her up and laughing at her daughter's obvious joy. Jasper watched as Mae pressed a hand to Bella's cheek, eager to share all of her latest adventures with her mother.

An awkward throat clearing had Jasper turning to face a red-faced wolf. Maybe they weren't completely presentable. Jasper could certainly smell what they'd just been up to, and judging by Jake's face, so could he.

"You weren't at the house, and Emmett said I should bring her over," Jake babbled, shifting uncomfortably from feet to foot.

Jasper waited, any second now…

Then Jake covered his face and groaned, "Emmett."

"You really should have guessed," Jasper said lightly, amused that his brother had successfully managed to get Jacob into such an uncomfortable position.

"So I brought her - I mean - yeah. She's here," Jake said, ignoring his taunt and refusing to look at any of them.

"Thanks, Jake," Bella croaked, mortification waring with amusement as she continued focusing on the little girl in her arms instead of her best friend.

"Bye, Nessie," Jacob muttered, turning towards the trees. "See you next week," he called before darting out of sight.

* * *

Jasper had a hard time keeping his hands off Bella now that they'd finally been together. Luckily, Jacob had worn Mae out at the beach. Apparently he and Quil had been able to teach Mae and Claire to swim. Bella thought Mae was still too young for that, but Jasper had a feeling it came as naturally to her as everything else had. She never had to be taught to walk, run, or read did she? And yet she just could on her first attempt.

Mae barely made it through dinner before she was out for the night. He really should thank Jake for wearing his little girl out so thoroughly - or not. Might make the mutt think he could make inappropriate jokes about wearing Swan girls out.

The second Mae was asleep Jasper pounced, dragging Bella back to their room. Within seconds he had her bared to him.

The next hours were spent feasting on every inch of her. He couldn't get enough. His quest was ceaseless and rewarding all at once.

There was no way he wouldn't be spending every moment that Mae was sleeping being with Bella in the future. Not now. Not after he'd experienced bliss for the first time. True bliss. More peaceful, more exhilarating, more consuming, more satisfying than anything else on Earth.

Bella was most assuredly better than human blood.

* * *

It had taken some coaxing, but Mae had finally agreed to go hunting rather than continue consuming donated blood. Jasper couldn't blame her for holding out as long as she had. He would go for donated blood too if it were an option.

The three of them had spent the morning running through the woods with Mae admiring the various leaf colors and swinging through the trees on the crisp November day before she finally agreed to hunt. Honestly, Jasper was surprised that she'd only procrastinated for four hours. He'd bet Emmett she'd hold out at least six. There went his brief respite from teasing over the hole Emmett had helped him repair in the cottage wall the week before.

That had been nearly as much fun damaging as his hunt with Bella the night before had been. They'd left Mae with her Auntie Rose so they could hunt in peace. It was the first time they'd managed to go alone since Bella's first hunt. Usually someone wanted to tag along to see Bella in action for themselves.

It was the first time Jasper had gotten to indulge himself on Bella while riding the blood high. She'd been nearly as frenzied as him, rolling about the forest floor and having sex under the stars. Their clothes certainly hadn't made it through the night.

It was different watching Mae hunt than it was when Jasper hunted himself. He'd worried that his past would influence him and make this uncomfortable for everyone, but he needn't have. At that moment, as he watched Mae finish drinking the last of the small doe she'd taken down, he felt nothing but pride. The pride a parent feels watching their child succeed at something new. He sensed Bella felt the same, no matter how strange the sight was. Because really, what two-month-old normally tackled a deer just to drink it's blood?

Mae dropped the deer and skipped merrily back to meet them. Jasper immediately scooped her up and chuckled at her disgruntled expression.

"I don't think I like deer," she said, sighing loudly.

"Me neither," he admitted bluntly. "Next time we'll try a bear."

"No. Not anytime soon, you won't," Bella interrupted, crossing her arms.

"Deer it is," Jasper agreed quickly. At Mae's resigned expression he asked, "Still thirsty?"

"Yes," she admitted.

"Best get to it then - or Grandma Esme can make you some more eggs if you'd rather," Jasper suggested, knowing she'd prefer blood.

"I'll hunt," Mae announced, leaping from Jazz's arms and racing into the woods to find another deer.

Bella and Jasper followed behind, close enough to watch her, but giving her enough space to stalk her prey without feeling threatened. It was a delicate balance.

They were both surprised when she targeted a large stag though. Bella gasped, crouching to spring forward, but Jasper caught her arm, halting her. Bella impatiently shrugged his hand away, but didn't move to interfere. Together, they watched as Mae easily caught the nine point stag in a headlock, her mouth latched onto the male's neck by the time her arms had finished encircling its neck. Silently the pair watched as the dying animal slowly sunk to the ground, felled by the child greedily drinking from his throat.

"She's only two months old and she can take down a stag," Bella whispered, fear clouding the air until it seemed night had arrived early.

"She has the appearance of a four-year-old and the intelligence of a teenager," Jasper acknowledged, though he knew that hadn't been what Bella was really worried about.

"How long will we have her?" Bella asked, clutching Jasper's arm in a vice grip even as her eyes remained glued to their daughter.

"Bella… "

"I can't lose her," Bella cried, finally looking up at Jasper. Her eyes begged him to make promises he didn't know if he could keep.

"We'll figure this out. I swear to you, I will find a way to keep her with us," Jasper finally said, unable to deny Bella something she needed so desperately. The same thing he needed as well.


	15. 15: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

The master race bit in this chapter is taken from what Stephenie Meyer has said about the vampire Johan, and not anything related to the current issues occurring in our society.

The song Give In to Me by Garrett Hedlund and Leighton Meester is the official theme song of Seth and Alice. I think I listened to it a dozen times while writing this chapter.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. I don't think there is any, but if so, most has changed at least a little. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 15 - Alice

_Jasper was sitting at the computer. The website for United Airlines was pulled up on the screen. His eyes closed and he sighed deeply before clicking the button for one-way. Next, the destination was typed, slowly. Guatemala City. The date was selected after that, January 7th. Finally, he clicked on the number of travelers and a menu popped up with the option to add additional passengers. He clicked the little plus sign to add a second adult. Blackness._

The vision ended abruptly. It was starting to become a familiar occurrence for Alice. It meant Mae was involved. The lack of sight could often be as telling as a vision itself.

But why only two adults? Why were Jasper and Bella leaving with Mae? And why Guatemala? It was a beautiful country, certainly, but sunny. Really sunny. Not a place that was easy for a vampire to go around undetected.

And _one-way_? How long did they expect to be gone? They'd miss so much with Mae if they were even gone a week!

The trio in question chose that moment to arrive at the house. She couldn't wait to see what they were thinking. Did Bella even know Jazz was planning this trip? At least he had the decency to wait until after the holidays. Alice would have put her foot down if they'd tried to duck out before Mae's first Christmas.

"Why are you leaving?" she demanded before the door was even all the way shut.

"Good morning to you too, Alice," Bella said, smiling.

"Why?" she demanded again, putting her balled up fists on her hips to try to look a bit more intimidating. Mae's presence meant she couldn't see and it was so frustrating being blind!

"That's where the Kaqchikel indigenous people are. They had the most accurate accounts of the birth. We're hoping to find out more," Jasper explained, looking at Rosalie. Discreetly, he glanced at Mae then outside.

"Renesmee, do you want to learn how to tune a car? My BMW needs some work, and I'd love to teach you," Rosalie said, reaching for Mae's hand.

"Momma?" Mae asked, looking for permission even as she started tugging her aunt towards the door, eager to go play.

"Of course, have fun," Bella agreed, trying to appear natural, and not as though they were trying to get rid of her so they could talk freely.

"What are you going to do if they can't help," Emmett asked, tuning off the football game and draping his arms over the back of the sofa so he was looking at his brother.

"Then we'll keep looking," Bella said, determination making her face tight.

"Why aren't the rest of us going with -" Alice began, but stopped when she saw the answer.

_Emmett and Rosalie were on a plane, seated in first class. Rosalie's head was pressed against Emmett's shoulder with his arm slung around her shoulder. His thumb was lightly stroking her side where his hand rested. He looked sad._

There was no sign of Alice, Esme, or Carlisle.

"We're all going somewhere different to search," Alice stated, nodding absently. That made sense. All of them wanted to help however they could.

"Of course we are," Emmett said. "It'll go faster and we'll have better luck if we divide and conquer. Besides, you really think I'd be all right sitting around here doing nothing when I could be helping my niece," he added, confirming her conclusions. It must have been his decision that triggered the flash. Too bad there hadn't been any indicators of where they were headed.

"Thank you," Jasper said quietly. Bella was wrapped in his arms, face buried in his shoulder. It must be so hard for her to complemplate something happening to Mae. Especially after how hard she fought to bring her into this world.

Carlisle and Esme came downstairs and moved at once to sit at the dining room table that seemed to be used more for life changing family decisions than it did for anything else. The rest of the family moved to join them.

"Alice, have you seen where any answers might be?" Carlisle asked carefully. He knew she was beating herself up over not being more help, and he didn't want her to feel bad if she was unable to now.

"No," she admitted, moving to sit at the table as well. She felt very alone as she watched the seated couple holding hands. Vampires didn't fidget as a rule, but she sat on her hands anyways just so she had something to do with the empty digits. At least Emmett's mate was outside right now or she'd really feel out of place. Was this how Edward felt all that time? No wonder he took off on his own every few years.

"Carlisle, you have friends all over the world," Jasper began haltingly, glancing at Bella.

"Can you visit them? See if they know anything?" Bella finished asking for him. "Please," Bella asked, pleading with their father. He'd almost always come through as a parent for her - the exception being when the Cullens left Forks. She needed him to come through for her now, to have the answers she sought.

"Only the ones you trust explicitly," Jazz qualified, worry wrinkling his brow. "I don't want Mae in danger because she's unique and someone wants to take advantage of the fact."

"I can try to check," Alice offered. "She won't actually be there, so I should be able to see something - I can try at least."

"That's not a bad idea," Emmett agreed encouragingly.

"What about Siobhan's coven?" Carlisle asked.

_A large woman was hugging Carlisle. She pulled back, heavy frame shaking with delighted laughter at seeing him. _

The scene was quickly replaced with another.

"_He's telling the truth," a beautiful redhead with wild curls declared, though she looked incredulous. Her entire countenance was a contradiction. She was young, fifteen or sixteen, with an air of innocence yet unmistakable knowledge._

_The first woman, Siobhan, was shaking her head in denial. "But it's not possible."_

"_So you've never heard of anything like this?" Esme asked, nearly pleading with the two women to give her a different answer. Carlisle rested a comforting hand on her shoulder._

"_No. Never," Siohban confirmed._

Alice dragged herself to the present. Something about the scene was trying to draw her back in. The vision clung to her like honey, thick and sticky. There was something her gift wanted her to see, but now wasn't the time. They had the answer they needed.

"No," Alice said sadly. "They don't have any answers for us. They keep to themselves mostly, don't they?"

"There are others I've met. Those that travel more - Mary, Randall. But I wouldn't know how to find them," Carlisle said, trying a different approach.

Alice considered, but nothing came to her. They weren't an option. Either they knew someone like Mae, which left her blind - unlikely - or they'd not find them. She hated to disappoint everyone, but she shook her head.

Bella's face crumpled and Alice felt her heart break as she watched.

"What about Amun? He's very, very ancient," Esme suggested, trying to remain positive and offer hope.

"He's older than the Volturi," Carlisle agreed, then added, "But he has a history with them. I'm not sure… Alice, can you tell?"

_A teenager, skin the color of carmel, was grinning as he watched waves rises and fall irregularly in a shallow pool. There was no obvious explanation for the water behaving so irregularly. In an instant the man looked up, grinning at Carlisle just as the water stilled, smooth as glass. The grin vanished once he noted the furious glare aimed his way from the older man standing a half step in front of Carlisle._

He could manipulate water. Alice marveled at the idea. She'd never dreamed… It was incredible. A gift that rivaled her own. One that was sure to be just as coveted.

It was a position she was familiar with. The danger of someone wanting to own her like a possession. To fail to see the individual's worth beyond the potential gains to be had by the skill the individual possessed.

Alice forced aside her personal interest, needing to know if Amun was worth seeking out. The moment she thought of Carlisle asking, a scene formed.

"_You've come to me for help," Amun stated, disdain twisting his face into a disapproving grimase. "It's been decades since we last spoke and you've yet to extend a proper hello since entering my home. I expected better from one with such vaunted character."_

It wasn't a yes. But it wasn't a no. And he didn't seem particularly surprised by the question of a hybrid either.

"What's his story?" Alice asked, meeting Carlisle's intrigued golden eyes.

"He thought to oppose the Volturi when the Romanians fell. The Volturi… dissuaded him from the notion. Amun enjoys holding power over others. He's a collector - like Aro."

"I'll say. If he does know something, he'll need persuasion to spill," Alice finally announced.

"But he's trustworthy?" Jasper asked, security his top priority.

"Amun has been keeping his own secret from the Volturi. You don't have to worry about him," Alice said, smiling at the thought of the young man. She'd like to meet him someday.

"We'll head to Egypt then," Carlisle said, nodding at Esme.

"What about Peter and Charlotte? They travel quite a bit," Alice said, directing the words to Jasper. She hadn't seen anything, but he may have already considered them and Mae had just blocked her. She wouldn't mind visiting them again. They weren't exactly friends, but she liked them well enough after the infrequent interactions they'd had over the years.

He shook his head, saying, "I already tried. They've never heard of this, and I know Maria wouldn't know anything."

She was surprised Jasper had even considered the woman. As far as she knew he wanted to keep Maria firmly in the past. Desperation could be a strange motivator.

"Do you know anyone else Rose and I could try?" Emmett asked, obviously feeling left out.

"Alistair shuns the company of others, so I'm afraid he'll be of no help," Carlisle said, obviously sorting through his vast assortment of connections. "There are the Ticuna legends -"

_Thick vines whipped by as Alice ducked beneath an enormous green leaf. Misty air so humid you could actually see the suspended water droplets stuck to her face as Alice zoomed past racing through the jungle. A monkey tried to follow her, swinging from branch to branch, but she out paced it easily. It's cries fading to distant echoes. _

"I'm heading there," she announced excitedly. "Sorry, Emmett," she added with a shrug, not actually the least bit sorry that she'd get to go explore the Amazon. It'd be an adventure, and she sorely needed one right now.

Emmett frowned, but didn't argue. In fact, he looked worried about her. She wished everyone would leave off already. She wasn't upset that Jasper was happier with Bella than he'd been with her. Okay. Maybe at first she had been. But that feeling had vanished weeks ago, months even.

Every time she noted someone's concern, it only served to remind her that she was lonely. Not for Jasper, but for someone of her own. Alice craved the companionship the others had.

"There are a few vampires local to the area that may be able to help you, Alice. We met them on one of our trips inland to hunt when we were visiting Isle Esme," Esme said.

"Thanks, I'll keep an eye out for them."

"Garrett may know something. He's very friendly, easy to talk to, so he may have come across something," Carlisle said suddenly, a renewed spark lighting his face.

"_I may have met someone that spouted nonsense like that. Why?"_

The man speaking to Rosalie and Emmett was rugged. Handsome in a rangy sort of way. He presented a cavalier attitude, yet seemed likable despite it.

Alice would have wanted to see more because she was intrigued by the stranger anyways, but his words absolutely demanded that she search more.

"_Please," Rosalie begged. "If you know anything," she said, desperation clear. _

_The stranger's expression sobered immediately. He looked back and forth between the two Cullens facing him, sizing them up. Surprise slowly dawned across his face._

_They were in a sports bar. A ball game played on the tv over the man's head. The Celtics. The assembled crowd was all wearing supporting clothes and cheered when the player the camera was zoomed in on scored a free throw._

"_There really is one then?" Garrett inquired, reluctant belief, the way someone discovering the myth of vampires was actually reality, shone in him._

"_One?" Emmett demanded, probing further. _

"_Master race - that's what this guy said he'd been told about," Garrett explained, leaning back on his stool and crossing his arms. _

"_Who? Where is he?" Emmett interrogated. His muscles bunched as though preparing to beat the information from Garrett if it wasn't forthcoming quick enough._

_Garrett was unperturbed. Not the least bit threatened or intimidated by Emmett's size or glower. He was too busy pondering the new knowledge he'd just received. _

"_More importantly, who told your friend about a 'master race'?" Rose asked, rolling her ideas at the stupidity of others. As if anyone was truly superior based on such arbitrary traits. Why were people, or even vampires in this case, so ridiculous and set on trying to create artificial levels amongst their own kind?_

"_Yes, I thought that was a bit much too," Garrett agreed. "My pal, he said some foreign scientist tried to enlist his help. Wanted to recruit him to breed with humans to create a superior species. He never said who it'd been, just said the man was crazy. It definitely sounded that way when he told me about it."_

"_How long ago was this? Would your friend know where to find this scientist?" Rosalie asked. _

"_What's his name?" Emmett added. _

"_Maybe a decade ago. It wouldn't hurt to ask him— Henry," Garrett offered, looking thoughtful. _

"_Emmett," Rose breathed hopefully, squeezing his arm. _

_Garrett watched the couple ruefully. After a minute, he stood saying, "He'll be in Philly this time of year. You ready to head out now?"_

"_You're coming with?" Emmett asked, clearly surprised by the man's assumption. _

"_I'm always up for a new adventure. And I think I'd like to meet the child myself."_

"Yes!" Alice cried, jumping up excitedly. "Garrett knows something - or he might. It didn't all make sense, but it's the best lead so far. _And_ I know he's in Boston."

"Mine. Dibs," Emmett called, despite being the last to get a destination.

"When do we leave?" Esme asked softly, trusting this was the best plan for her family.

"Not until after the holidays," Alice said firmly. "We're spending them here. Together."

"Thank you," Bella said quietly. It must be hard for her, not having formed any connections that could help in this new life. Luckily she had the rest of them. They'd always look out for each other. That's what family did.

* * *

Since deciding things, the house had been filled with a flurry of activity.

Thanksgiving had passed without much fanfare before they'd even decided to split up and search for answers, which made sense since none of them ate human food anyways so they hadn't really wanted a huge turkey spread. But Alice had gone overboard decorating the house for Mae's first Christmas. It was Bella's first Christmas with the family too. Alice didn't want anymore occasions to pass them by.

Christmas was still a while out, a couple weeks, but the family had put aside planning their respective trips long enough to trim the tree - trees - together. Emmett had even lifted Mae up to put a star on the top of each one.

Because of course Alice had insisted on having one in each room of the house, including the bedrooms and largely unused bathroom. Most people weren't lucky enough to remember their first Christmas. Alice couldn't remember any of her human ones. But Mae would be able to. And her Christmases could be limited. So Alice was determined to go all out for this one.

The house had been transformed into a winter wonderland. Garland hung from the stair banister and every available ledge. Fluffy stockings dangled from the mantle, twinkle lights and snowflakes hung from every ceiling. If you squinted, it almost appeared as if a blizzard had actually occurred inside the Cullen house. Silver and white shimmered and glittered on every surface.

The best part was that Alice hadn't even had to try to get everyone to help out. Ordinarily, they rolled their eyes or teased her about going overboard. But not this time. No. Instead, they did what she asked without questions, complaints, or mistakes. No one ever seemed to fully envision the possibilities quite the way she could. That was why it was so important for her to always recreate them - so the people she loved could see them actually realized!

Carlisle had even surprised her by having bouquets of snowdrops, poinsettias, winter honeysuckle, and hellebore delivered - enough for each room to have some.

It was perfect.

It was magical.

It was unforgettable.

And Alice had forgotten enough, so she liked anything that just asked to be remembered.

Everyone else was outside having a snowball fight. The wet flakes had been falling for hours already, and it was Mae's first time getting to play when there was enough to actually have a bit of fun. A new idea had come to Alice to add crystal snowmen, reindeer, and santas to each room though, so she'd stayed behind to rearrange things. The light would reflect off them and shatter into interesting patterns. She'd just finished the final touches when her phone rang - unexpectedly.

Alice saw who was on the other end just as she answered. "Hello, Edward."

"Alice."

She waited, but her name was all he said. She knew just from the suddenness of the call that he hadn't actually planned to dial her. And now that he had her, he didn't seem to know what to say.

"Merry Christmas," Alice said, offering him an olive branch. It was a little early for the traditional saying, but maybe the holiday spirit would help in this situation.

"How are you?" Edward finally rasped.

"Better than you, but I guess it's all relative," Alice admitted. It was her first Christmas alone in decades, her niece may be dying, and her brother wasn't there. Things weren't perfect, but she still had things that made her happy.

"I've reached a dead end. Eleazer couldn't really help and we've exhausted all of his leads," Edward said with a sigh. Alice could picture him rubbing his face tiredly as he spoke.

"What are you talking about?" Alice asked, not following his words, and annoyed she had to ask for clarification.

"Eleazer has been helping me look into others like Renesmee. He checked with a few people he met during his time with the Volturi, and just a few things he's learned, but there's nothing helpful," Edward explained, surprising her.

"I didn't see…" Alice began, trailing off as she understood that Edward was trying to help his daughter, despite everything.

"Leah's helping too - for Jake's sake. That's probably why," he said, helping her to understand her limitations in this situation. Still, she heard the annoyance in his tone when he said the wolf's name.

"Please tell me you're not deliberately antagonizing her," Alice begged. The last thing he needed was the pack against him too. Seth had worked really hard to make sure they wouldn't side against Edward if he did come back.

"She's infuriating," he said simply. Ever the spoiled brat not used to having anyone question him or stand up to him.

"She doesn't coddle you like the rest of us always have," Alice said fondly. They really had made his bad traits worse. It was no wonder he liked to run off and pout when he didn't get his way. They let him and spoiled him when he came back. Always had. Why would he think to do anything different when behaving this way had gotten him what he wanted in the past?

"It's not like I need handling," Edward said petulantly.

"Don't you?" Alice asked gently. He had to understand the current situation for what it truly was. Edward was in the wrong. He had to face the consequences. It wasn't a game with a reset button.

For a long time he said nothing. If he'd been nearby, she'd bet he was reading her mind and processing what he found - even if he didn't like it. But he wasn't. So she had no idea what he was up to.

"She's as brutally honest with me about my failings as I am with her about her own," Edward finally said. Alice could just imagine how well that went over with either of them.

Deciding to let that lie, she asked, "Is Leah how you knew about the aging problem?"

"Carlisle told me first - I already told him that Eleazer couldn't help," he explained - answering her unspoken question about why Carlisle hadn't suggested talking to the Denalis when they'd made plans the other day. Edward continued, "But she's kept me updated on your progress with Renesmee. Seth shares everything he can with her since he knows I'll see it all in her head."

Of course he did. Seth was his friend. He'd want to try and let Edward experience as much of Mae's childhood as he could. Fondness for the wolf surged inside her. He really was remarkable. So generous and forgiving.

"He's hoping you come home soon," Alice said, not admitting to her own feelings - about Seth or Edward's potential return.

"I can't yet," Edward replied immediately. It was pointed enough that she frowned, wanting to know more, to understand his reluctance.

"What are you waiting for?"

As soon as she asked, she saw his response.

_He was speaking into the phone, his head partially bowed in shame and defeat. "I thought if I could find an answer, or some way to help that she'd forgive me for not being a good father."_

It broke her heart. Alice wished she could cry.

"I -" Edward began to say, but she cut him off, not wanting to force him to say it again, even if the first time was only in her mind.

"You don't have to be a hero for her to love you. She's as naturally forgiving as Bella always was and still is. But Renesmee can't forgive you if she never even gets the chance to meet you."

"I don't know how to face her. Not after what I've done."

"I love you," Alice said. It was the only truth she had to give him just then.

"I miss you," Edward said ruefully.

"Come home soon," Alice begged, needing to repair her family.

"I'll think about it. Take care of them for me," he said, hanging up before she could reply.

"Merry Christmas," Alice muttered to the dial tone.

* * *

Alice smelled him before she saw him. Sandalwood. Trees. Scents of the forest that should be too earthy and musky, yet surprisingly… weren't. Instead, they were just familiar and welcome.

It was a scent she associated with peace of mind, freedom from the burden of seeing the future, sunshine, smiles, and warmth.

Seth. Seth Clearwater. La Push werewolf. Her… friend.

Yes. Let's go with that - unexpected friend and confidant. Definitely nothing more.

Running through the trees towards the house after her hunting trip, she found him on her porch, hanging a swing from hooks he'd apparently just screwed into the ceiling.

Recognition of the swing had her coming to an abrupt halt several feet from the stairs leading up to the porch. Stunned. It caught her completely off guard. She was floundering. A fish out of water.

He'd sensed her approach and turned to see her just as she'd stopped. He mistook her frozen posture for displeasure.

"I thought I warned you that I was going to surprise you," he said uncertainly, rubbing the back of his neck in a gee shucks fashion.

"You did," Alice breathed, barely audible. Seth frowned, looking from the swing to her. He hesitated, opened his mouth, then closed it. Alice felt guilty for worrying him, and forced words out. "I just wasn't expecting this."

"You don't like it? Should I have asked Esme first? It's a gift for the whole family, since you guys spend so much time out here I thought it'd be nice for you to have, but if you don't like it… " Seth said, shoulders slumping a bit. The chilling breeze ruffled his ebony locks, making it messier than normal.

"No! It's perfect. I'm sure everyone will love it," Alice denied, finally hurrying up the steps. She touched his arm as she said the last part, infusing it with sincerity. He was so warm. It beaconed her the way a hot tube would after a long day at work.

Now that she was closer, she saw the little entwined suns and moons hand carved along the top. Vampires and wolves interlocking. He'd made the swing. Seth made it for them, for her. The realization struck her frozen again.

"Alice, I know you well enough to know when you're not saying everything," Seth said, using a finger to tilt her chin back so she was looking at him. Had he always been so tall? He towered over her petite frame - not that everyone else didn't or anything.

"I saw the swing. A couple months ago in a vision. I just never realized it'd be connected to you," she admitted, tearing her eyes from the brown flecks dancing in the inky pools of his to look at the swing again.

Neither spoke for several minutes. Here was another piece of the vision coming true. She was all right with it happening. Welcomed it even given how tense everyone was about Mae and how relaxed they were in the vision. But seeing this concrete piece of the vision for the first time and knowing Seth was part of it threw her.

"Are you all right?" he finally asked, sensing it hadn't been a vision of sunshine and rainbows - at least not for her.

"We're leaving," Alice announced, surprising herself.

"When?" Seth demanded, panic flickering in his eyes like a dying light bulb, there and gone and there again with little control.

"In a couple weeks," Alice said softly.

"So much for the swing," Seth mumbled. "You won't even get to use it."

"We're coming back here," Alice said, then sighed, knowing she'd have to explain everything. "We're going to search for others like Mae. We need answers."

"You think there are any? Others like her, I mean," Seth asked hopefully. Optimism shone through like a lighthouse beacon.

"I hope so. We have a few leads."

"How long will it take to check them all out?"

"We're splitting up, so hopefully we'll know more in a few weeks. Maybe a couple months. Rose and Em are going to Boston, Carlisle and Esme to Egypt, Bella, Jasper and Mae to Guatemala. We have some hope."

"You'll be alone," he said, picking up on the fact she hadn't mentioned herself with any of the others. "Take me with you," Seth demanded a second later, grinning excitedly even as he spoke the ridiculous words.

"You don't even know where I'll be going!" Alice cried, exasperated - mostly because she was tempted to agree.

"I told you I want to travel. I've been learning Spanish. You can show me Spain -"

"South America," Alice corrected, revealing her destination.

"That works too," Seth agreed at once, nodding eagerly.

"They speak Portugese in Brazil - that's where I'm starting. With the Ticuna tribe - well, someone that knows of them."

"You're going to explore the Amazon? Alice, please - you have to let me come with," Seth begged, grabbing her hands and bouncing on his toes.

"What about your mom? The pack? School?" Alice questioned, knowing it was insane to even entertain the idea, but his excitement was contagious. And she had to admit the whole thing was much less daunting when she considered going with a friend instead of alone.

"You know my mom will understand. Jake too since this will help Mae. And I bet the school will let me take my finals before we leave. Which meeeeaaaannnnnsss, he said, drawing out the words as far as he could before continuing, "I'll have till next August before I need to worry - they've been making exceptions for pack members missing school for years now."

"I can't believe I'm seriously considering this," Alice said, mind whirling.

"You know it'll be better with me there. You'd miss me if I didn't go," Seth urged, using puppy eyes to persuade her.

"Fine! You win. You can come," Alice said, caving against her better judgement. But part of her was thrilled he wanted to go. Knew it'd be infinitely better with him along.

It was that part that ultimately made the decision. The part that was tired of holding back. Tired of being lonely and miserable when she didn't have to be. The part that knew Seth could make her laugh even if they didn't like the answers they found. The same part that knew he'd be able to comfort her if that was the case.

"Guess I have some packing to do," Seth grinned, catching her up in a brief hug before bouncing off the porch and disappearing into the woods.

Alice chuckled as she watched him disappear then moved to sit on the swing. There was a slight curve to the seat and she imagined it would make it more comfortable to sit on if she were human. The wood was dark, walnut or chestnut maybe.

She ran her hand over the textured surface, tracing the intricate design etched into the arm rest. A scene played out along the length of wood. Wolves and humans running through a forest. Alice could almost sense the playful chase.

It was remarkably detailed. He must have spent hours carving it. There was even a smile on the girl's face. She thought it might be Mae depicted based on the long curls trailing her.

The vision she'd had with the swing came to her. The way it had ended so abruptly. It was the same whenever Mae was involved. Was that who Jasper was greeting? It made sense. And everyone had been so happy. Did that mean she'd be fine?

Esme stepped outside, interrupting her musings. She looked like a snow angel in her fluffy white sweater and white slacks with her hair in big soft curls floating about her shoulders. She joined Alice on the swing, smiling at her daughter.

"This was a very thoughtful gift," Esme murmured, eyeing Alice.

"Yes," Alice agreed, knowing Esme had something on her mind and would eventually spill - but only on her own terms.

She liked to gauge her children's reactions, judge how receptive to her wisdom they'd be before trying. Alice approved of the practice. Saved a lot of time with wasted speeches that would only fall on deaf ears. Edward was the perfect example of one that wouldn't hear well intentioned advice. Probably why Esme stopped trying long before Alice had even joined the family. But then, Edward was too stubborn to know when to follow good advice or he wouldn't be in the situation he was now.

"And he is turning into a wonderful young man," Esme said, weighing Alice's reaction to her words.

"Esme," Alice said, wanting her to back off, but at the same time wondering what she thought of Seth's crush.

"I feel a lot better about this knowing he'll be with you," Esme admitted.

"I can take care of myself," Alice said defensively. Maybe she wasn't as useful of late, but that didn't mean she wasn't still capable.

"I'm your mother. It's my right to worry about my children," Esme said, the words and tone soothing the unintended slight.

There was a long pause. Alice realized just how defensive she'd become, and made a conscious effort to relax. Esme waited patiently, sensing the change in Alice as well as her receptiveness.

"I know you're still hurting over Jasper," Esme murmured, lowering her voice to ensure no one overhead. Alice wasn't ashamed of the fact, but it was a bit awkward. She didn't still want to be with Jasper herself, more she missed being part of a unit, and of having someone to rely on. It was the same realization she'd had when they'd been planning their upcoming trips. "Seth makes you happy," Esme added.

"I'm scared," Alice admitted, leaning against Esme, seeking motherly affection. Esme wrapped an arm around her at once.

Part of Alice feared that she'd latch onto Seth just because he was a convenient substitute. She knew it wasn't really like that. But she needed time to fully heal first so she stopped worrying that it might be that. She didn't want to unintentionally hurt him, because the truth was that she did find him attractive and they definitely had chemistry.

"The unknown is scary for all of us. But you can't spend the rest of your life standing still. It's a dangerous thing for our kind to do. It's too easy to stagnate or petrify, to let your heart turn to stone," Esme advised. "Eventually, you'll have to move forward once more."

"With a wolf - our natural enemy?"

"With the man that so obviously adores you, and is already part of our family," Esme corrected, kissing the top of Alice's head.

* * *

"When do you take your finals?" Alice asked. She was sitting on the porch swing, absently tracing the pattern of a wolf carved into the arm rail. It had become her favorite place to sit and explore the future. It also conveniently gave her a clear view of the path from the woods to the house that Jacob and Seth frequently used.

"Tomorrow," he said, coming up to plop down beside her. The chair swung sideways with the extra weight, twisting a bit before righting itself and settling into a steady rhythm.

"Cutting it close. Are you ready?" Today was the fourth, and they were leaving the morning of the seventh.

Alice had helped Seth study a couple times, but she'd been surprised to realize he didn't need any extra tutoring. He already knew the entire semester's worth of curriculum that he would be tested over since he was planning on missing it. When she'd questioned him about it, he'd just shrugged and said he liked reading.

"Think so. They'll be easier than saying bye to mom and Charlie. He doesn't get why she's 'letting me move in with Leah'."

That had been his excuse for leaving so Charlie wouldn't go looking the way he had when Jake took off. Seth had told him he was missing his father and being around Leah would help. Charlie bought the sorry excuse, but only after Seth had brought up how Bella had moved in the middle of her junior year, the same as he was doing.

"You could always stay," Alice said, offering him an out.

"I'd rather be where you are," Seth said, turning sideways on the swing to face her and propping his foot on his knee to get more comfortable.

"You mean you don't want to pass up a free trip abroad," Alice teased lightly, deliberately mistaking his meaning.

"Alice," Seth said, suddenly serious. "Don't play dumb. It's not a convincing look on you."

"Really, Seth?" Alice asked, a bit incredulous.

"You know how I feel about you. I haven't made much of a secret of it, and I've heard your family talking about it to you - several times."

"Do we have to talk about this?" Alice tried, not ready to make a decision one way or another yet. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Then give me a chance," Seth requested, gently touching her arm. He was so warm. His skin was as hot as Renesmee's. It burned with intensity. Smouldering every bit as much as his eyes were as they seemed to penetrate her very soul.

"I can't," Alice claimed, taking the coward's way out.

"Just think of all the adventures we could have. Endless possibilities - and I'll love you through it all," Seth declared, making the promise of youth and inexperience. It was enough to exasperate her.

"Hff," she huffed. "You can't make that promise."

"I can. I am."

"And what if you imprint?" she demanded, finally voicing her primary concern. The reason she hadn't even been willing to consider Seth as a real possibility. Not even after Esme tried to convince her to go for it.

"Imprinting doesn't have to be romantic," Seth argued, shaking his head when he registered her disbelief.

"Of course it does," she accused.

"Not always," Seth repeated, adding, "I'm serious."

"When? Since you seem to have all the answers, _when_ has a wolf imprinted and not been in love with her?" Alice silently begged him to have an example, yet at the same time she dreaded hearing it. If he did, which she doubted, then she'd actually have to consider giving Seth a chance. If he didn't, she had a nagging feeling that she'd be… disappointed.

"Levi Uley. Sam's great-grandfather and my great-granduncle," Seth replied, almost at once. It was as if he'd just been waiting for her to ask. "I figured Jake told you guys about it so you'd think his imprinting on Mae was less icky if you knew they might not ever fall in love."

"He may have told Bella, but no, the rest of us haven't heard the story."

"Well, he imprinted on this girl named Christina. She was pretty young when it happened, ten or eleven maybe, but they just ended up best friends. They each married someone different that they loved," Seth said, grinning widely as only the truly vindicated could.

"What happened to her?" Alice asked, curious despite herself.

"She moved to the Makah reservation. Funny story actually… " Seth trailed off awkwardly. Red bloomed high across his cheeks, and he bit his full lower lip.

"How is that funny?" Alice asked, confused now. And quite a bit distracted.

"She's Embry's great-grandmother," he admitted, deliberately raising his brows and waiting for her to sort the rest of the story out.

"And most people think Sam's dad is Embry's dad too."

"Yeah. But see! That's the point. Imprinting is just about trying to pass on the wolf gene. Levi's imprint meant things were set up so eventually there were two different lines carrying on the wolf gene instead of one - more bang for your buck, as it were. Which was better for us since we needed more wolves to fight the newborns last spring. It was nothing romantic for him."

"And you think the same would be true for you?" Alice asked doubtfully. It seemed more likely that he'd taken the story out of context and twisted it just enough to fit a new mold - one made for convincing her to give him a shot.

"I don't think I can imprint because of my cancer," he explained. "It might be gone, but I've got a low sperm count now meaning I probably can't have kids even if I ever wanted them. No kids means no passing on the gene means -"

"No point in imprinting at all," she finished for him, following along with his reasoning. He did have a point with that bit at least. That seemed to make more sense than Levi's story.

"But if I did? It would be like Levi and Christina - just friends," Seth vowed.

"Why are you so sure?" Alice asked, though she wished she hadn't when she saw the determination in his eyes.

"Because I gave you my heart months ago," Seth said boldly. Immediately after the words left his lips he swallowed convulsively. His heart rate accelerated, and Alice saw sweat bead along his hairline.

He was nervous. Anxious to see how she'd respond. In fact, he almost appeared to regret saying the words. As if he knew it was a bit much, and a bit too soon. It sounded like a youthful declaration that was all heart and no substance. Like someone that was in love with love and didn't actually know what love was. Worse, it sounded like a cheesy pickup line from a romantic comedy. Alice was tempted to call him on it. But she just couldn't do that to him. They'd come too far as friends to hurt him like that.

"I'm sure Leah thought the same was true for her and Sam," Alice settled for saying instead. She actually wanted to hear his thoughts about that. Particularly since he now claimed imprinting didn't equal love. And from all accounts, Leah and Sam had been pretty serious prior to the imprinting.

"Sam made that choice. He chose to fall in love with Emily. Imprinting was just an excuse to do it and not feel guilty for hurting my sister," Seth said, a little bitterly. "At least until Leah was a wolf too and he had a firsthand look inside her head at the pain he'd caused. Then he felt guilty and then some."

"I'm sorry," Alice said, truly sympathetic to his sister's plight.

"Thanks," Seth said, acknowledging her sincerity.

They sat in silence after that. Both thinking over the revelations of the last hour.

"Alice?" Seth finally murmured, standing up to look down at her directly.

"Hmm?"

"Don't write me off just yet. Just… promise you'll think about it," he requested, walking backwards down the porch steps.

"Seth," Alice said, using his name as a plea to let up for now.

"I'll wear you down," Seth called, incorrigible as ever. He'd certainly have time during their trip of unknown duration.

"You can try," Alice conceded, a flicker of excitement catching her off guard at the prospect of giving in to him.


	16. 16: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

Enjoy your 4th of July weekend :)

This chapter starts in the middle of the previous chapter, but it covers different events.

I went more with how Renesmee aged in the movie than the book. Considering Mackenzie Foy was twelve at the time, not the five-ish mentioned in the book. This works better with the next events.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. I don't think there is any, but if so, most has changed at least a little. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 16 - Bella

Christmas was never a big deal to her. Bella was like Charlie, she didn't really make a fuse. Gifts weren't a major incentive to celebrate, and she didn't really enjoy festive parties — they never went well for her. Mostly, she recalled it being just like the rest of the year.

This year was different. She actually appreciated all of Alice's efforts to make the holiday special for Renesmee. Her daughter's giggles never failed to make her smile, and the tinkling sound of them filled the main house frequently throughout the month of December.

Christmas Eve was particularly wonderful. Rosalie had recently begun teaching Mae how to play the piano. She'd taken to it with ease, demonstrating a natural skill with the instrument. That night she gave the family, Jake, Seth, Embry, and Quil a miniature concert. Her cherub cheeks flushed a brilliant scarlet when the wolves cheered and whistled at the conclusion. Jazz's emotions had spilled continuously throughout the night, and Bella basked in his pride in Mae and joy at being with Bella.

After Mae fell asleep on the couch, her head in Bella's lap, Jazz and Bella read curled against each other while the rest of the family silently set about arranging gifts under the tree. Once finished, the other couples retired to their respective rooms. Jasper and Bella remained on the sofa, eager to witness Mae's reaction when she woke the next morning and saw the waiting surprise.

It was worth it when she heard the excited squeal and watched her little girl bounding about the room calling for everyone to come join her.

Bella had worried about everyone getting each other extravagant gifts, but she needn't have. Especially since they already showered each other with new, and unnecessary, things all year round. All spoiling was reserved for Mae instead this time.

As for Bella's first gift for her daughter, she'd gotten her a locket that used to belong to Esme. Esme had allowed Bella to sort through the mirage of jewelry she'd received in the last century to find the perfect piece. Jasper had taken it to get it engraved with "Plus Que Ma Propre Vie", the French words meaning "More than my own life". He'd said it was fitting considering Bella's efforts to bring Mae into the world and her willingness to die to ensure her daughter survived. To say she'd been touched by his thoughtfulness was an understatement.

They'd known the others would be spoiling Renesmee extravagantly, with clothes and toys and all the girly stuff Bella had never been personally interested in like nail polish and hair clips. Jasper had agreed that they could do something more meaningful instead. Bella wanted her daughter to have something with history to show her that she belonged and was part of their family. Something she could keep her whole life.

"Don't worry, I didn't get you anything," Jasper breathed into her ear, pausing to kiss the skin just below. Shivers distracted her making it hard to process what he'd said.

"Anything? What are —oh!" Bella said, understanding. Gratitude filled her, and he smiled in response. Though she was curious about why he hadn't.

He answered the unspoken question. "Maybe you don't remember what happened the last time you were given gifts in this house, but I do. It's just better if I don't make a fuss. Especially since I can feel how much you hate it anyways," Jasper had whispered to her while the others exchanged gifts.

He chuckled when he felt her grateful relief. She loved him so much for not trying to change her, and just accepting her quirks.

"I didn't get you anything," she admitted a little shamefully. It hadn't even occurred to her to get him a gift. She'd been so focused on preparations, not wanting anything herself, and making sure Mae got a good Christmas that she'd overlooked it.

Humor surrounded her, and she kissed his neck, knowing it would drive him crazy.

"Let me unwrap you later," Jasper suggested, intending her to be the gift. That was an idea Bella could fully support.

Jasper must have sensed her approval, because she felt a spike of lust replace his amusement. His wanting her was an aphrodisiac. An unneeded one considering how much she always desired him already.

When the feeling spiked higher rather than dissipating, Bella sucked in a sharp breath and muffled a groan as she buried her head against his shoulder. He was feeding off her emotions now. It made her long for privacy so he could get on with the promise of unwrapping her.

Roaslie had given her a red satin bra that tied in the front with a big bow. Bella had stared at the thing suspiciously, doubting its effectiveness - bras ultimately were supposed to serve a practical purpose, not just entrance lovers. Her sister had shaken her head sadly at Bella's woeful ignorance, and reminded her that vampire bodies didn't need the support so she should just say thank you and wear it for Jasper's benefit.

Bella hadn't brought herself to do it yet. It still went against her nature to be overly done up when the ordinary worked just fine. And judging from Jasper's emotions, he'd never minded. He usually accidentally tore the fabric in his haste to remove it anyways. Always he preferred seeing her without anything on at all than he did in fancy underwear.

It might be nice to surprise him tonight though. She could almost feel the phantom touch of his fingers grazing the side of her breast as he tugged on the ribbon to release the bow. Readily, the image of his tawny eyes darkening with hunger for her appeared behind her closed eyelids. The sound of crazed breaths, echoed faintly. Sweetened pecans and summer, sun-soaked tea filled her mouth as she anticipated tasting him, kissing his toned body, licking his -

"Reign it in, please - for my sanity," Jasper huffed. His fists were balled and the skin around his eyes was tight with control. He was struggling not to carry her off, she realized. He was following along with her fantasy, no words needed. "Bella, I won't last all day if you don't."

Bella forced herself to push the thoughts away, determined to spare him. More, it was so she didn't miss her daughter's first Christmas because she was too horny to wait a few hours. Avoiding Emmett's teasing over their lack of control was a pretty good incentive too.

The rest of Christmas morning was spent with Mae opening her remaining presents, and then everyone headed outside to build a snowman. It was the most elaborate snowman Bella had ever seen, more like a snow sculpture complete with a set of frosty clothes than a set of rolled snowballs descending in size and stacked three deep. Emmett had even given it a mohawk and made it look like it was screaming. Though he insisted that the creation was actually singing.

Mae had trouble helping since the snow melted against her hundred-and-four degree skin, so she settled for supervising and ordering the others around on how to build it right. Everyone sought her advice before proceeding, and was rewarded with her ringing laughter and excited cheers as she danced around pointing things out.

Once she'd had enough fun outside, Esme and Rose commenced helping Mae make a gingerbread house while Bella and Alice watched. Bowls of licorice, candy canes, gumdrops, m&ms, and sprinkles were scattered across the countertops. Esme was guiding Mae's hands on a rolling pin as she smoothed out the dough for the roof while Rose pulled a cookie sheet with a freshly baked wall out of the oven.

The smell was pleasant enough, but the thought of consuming any, despite the fact gingerbread cookies has always been her favorite while she'd been human, had her nose wrinkling in disgust. Nothing would tempt her into trying human food. Throwing it up after wasn't an appealing thought.

* * *

When a knock sounded late that evening, she answered it absently, more out of habit than anything since she'd always done so at either of her parent's houses.

"Jake? Seth? What are you guys doing here?" They'd spent Christmas Eve with the Cullens, so Bella hasn't expected to see them on Christmas Day too.

"Merry Christmas, Bells," Jacob said, kissing her cheek and sliding passed her to ease inside. He didn't even react to the contact with a vampire, but she discreetly turned her head to breathe some fresh air lacking the unappealing aroma of wet dog.

"Don't you have your own families to bother today?" she asked, not deterred. Jake always monopolized Mae's attention when he was around.

"Momma, they had to come. No one else would eat the house," Mae called from the kitchen.

Bella rolled her eyes. She should have guessed Mae called them to come over. "You really want to destroy it after you just spent hours making it?"

"I don't want it to go to waste," she said simply.

"It does smell pretty good," Seth said apologetically. "Embry and Quil asked for some too when they heard. Embry's mom wouldn't let him come and Quil is with his grandfather," Seth explained, following after Jake.

"You really made this, Nessie?" Jake questioned, leaning against the counter as he examined the two story house lined in white frosting and candy gumdrops.

Mae's hand was pressed to his cheek, probably sharing the parts she'd completed, and after a moment he nodded, likely acknowledging that he saw what she'd directed him to notice. The two were completely in tune. Bella refused to think too much on it, knowing it was no different from how the rest of them saw Mae.

"Looks like I'm outvoted," Bella muttered as Jake demolished the chimney in two bites.

"This is incredible," Jake said around a mouthful of food. Bella and Mae both wrinkled their noses in identical looks of disgust at the partially masticated food that was visible between words and Jacob promptly closed his mouth, a red flush appearing on his face at the silent rebuke.

"Are you still going to watch _Home Alone_?" Seth asked, accepting the offered chuck of roof that Mae held out to him.

Yesterday Emmett had claimed it was the best Christmas movie ever, and had briefly outlined the plot. Mae had been bewildered by the idea of being overlooked by family enough to get left behind like that and asked to watch it.

"Yes! You got here just in time," Mae said excitedly.

So that's why she'd stalled starting the movie. The little minx. Mae broke two big chucks of the house off and handed a piece to each wolf, then lead the way into the family room for everyone to watch the movie.

* * *

A couple days later Bella was packing Renesmee's things for their trip. Alice had dropped off several bags of new clothes, insisting she'd need them all. Her sister hadn't appreciated it very much when Bella pointed out that Alice couldn't know that for certain. In the end, Bella had let Mae pick out her favorite three outfits and those would be the only ones going.

If they forgot something important, she was sure they could easily replace it. Especially since they were only taking a backpack for her and Jasper, and a small bag, more of a purse really, for Mae. The purse was a little black leather bag that Bella had borrowed from Alice since it was small enough not to look strange for Mae to carry herself. Her daughter was strong enough that the weight didn't bother her at all. They were trying to travel light, not bring an entire mall with them.

Actually, Bella was worried there wouldn't be much point in packing more than one or two outfits at all. Not with the way Mae was continuing to change. The top of her daughter's head already nearly reached Bella's shoulder. Two weeks ago Mae could have passed for five. Today, her height alone made her look closer to eight or nine, though her face still looked younger. She'd had a major growth spurt just since Christmas.

Luckily, Jasper had planned ahead and ordered her three separate passports that put her age at seven, twelve, and fifteen. They'd use the one that best fit the situation when the time came to return since they didn't know how long they'd be gone. What if it was over a year and Renesmee kept growing at the rate she had these last three and a half, nearly four, months? She would appear older than Bella before too much longer.

It was the major growth spurts that threw Bella the most. There were some nights her daughter literally grew almost an inch. Carlisle suggested it may just be a survival mechanism. Bella had demanded he not sugarcoat his explanation when she'd wanted to know more. He'd theorized that her accelerated growth in these first few months may just be a way for her to advance to the point she could care for herself since the birth process typically involved killing the mother. He reminded Bella that it was only because of their interference that she hadn't died in the process as well. If there were others, a normal situation would likely result in the child being alone and forced to find nourishment without help. It'd be easier if the child was able to develop faster.

Bella had nodded at his explanation, understanding the words, but all she really heard was that it was only an initial rapid growth. That there was a chance it would slow to normal rates soon.

"Don't forget my iPod," Mae said. She was double checking the other things Alice had sent to make sure she didn't want to take any of them, but she'd stopped long enough to hand Bella the silver rectangle with white headphones wrapped tightly around it.

"Where'd you get this?" Bella asked as she turned the thin item over. She'd never seen it before.

"Dad gave it to me for Christmas," Mae said cheerily. She was still giddy over the magical quality of Christmas.

"I don't think he did," Bella said, frowning. She'd have remembered Jasper buying it. Probably it belonged to one of her siblings and they'd either let her daughter borrow it or she'd taken it by mistake thinking it was meant for her since so many of the gifts had been.

"Not papa - dad. Edward," Mae clarified, catching Bella off guard.

"How did… "

"It had my name on it, and I recognized the writing from some of his things in the garage," Mae said quietly, studiously not looking at Bella. "The music is the same as the CDs boxed up out there too," she added, carefully folding the dress she was holding.

"You must have a ton of questions," Bella finally choked out. This wasn't how she thought this discussion would go. How had she even known Edward was her father?

Wait, Edward had sent Renesmee a Christmas gift? She didn't realize he cared enough to do that. He'd made no attempt to meet his daughter or even call Bella to talk about things. And Mae said she'd recognized the writing. Did that mean he'd intended to give the gift anonymously?

Renesmee shrugged, almost indifferently - almost. Without saying a word, she put the newly folded dress in a drawer. Probably just so it could be donated later, never having been worn.

"You know you can ask me anything, Renesmee," Bella said encouragingly. She didn't want her daughter to feel like she had to keep her feelings secret. Bella wanted them to have an open relationship and discuss any and all major issues that came up. Mae had to be confused over how Edward fit into her life and why he wasn't around.

And Bella had agreed not to lie or hide the truth about Edward from his own daughter. That sort of deceit didn't have a place in her new life.

"I love you, momma," Mae said, wrapping her arms around Bella to hug her. "And I love papa," she said before letting go. Then she walked out of the room without saying anything else or giving Bella the chance to try and find the right words to explain.

* * *

Bella stood from her crouched position, leaving the drained deer on the ground. Immediately, she felt Jasper's presence at her back.

Spinning to see him, she was surprised to find herself pinned against a tree before completing her half circle. The bark exploded into splinters cascading down around her like rain as her back made impact with the ancient tree.

Instantly, Bella tugged Jazz closer, dragging him against her with her enhanced strength and reveling in her ability to do so. He didn't resist either, eagerly pressing harder against her. In less than a sixty-fourth of a second their lips were fastened together, wild and hungry.

Fabric rustled against her side, the satin material slipping against the smoothness of her skin. A rent sounded in the background, and the feel of satin was gone, replaced with the sizzling touch of a familiar, needy hand. The torn pieces of her panties floated to the ground, brushing her thighs, claves, and toes as they fell.

Then he was inside her, thrusting to the hilt in a single exquisite stroke. The friction was magnificent, and she urged him on, wrapping her slender legs around his lean waist. She undulated her hips, pressing against him as he bucked erratically into her.

Latch onto his neck, Bella nipped at the sensitive skin and swirled her tongue over the scarred ridges. "Mine," Jasper hissed through clenched teeth.

"Yes," Bella gasped, using her legs to pull him tighter against her.

A cocoon wove itself around them. The fibers born of powerful emotions. Bella drank them in, offering her own in return. He loved her. It was an endless well. Lusted for her too. The coarse emotion made her feel beautiful beyond comparison. She felt seen for the first time in her life and loved the attention. A touch of possessiveness was there as well. It matched her own.

Jasper was hers. She'd never willingly give him up.

She nipped his chin, and was rewarded with a jerk of his hips that had him hitting just the right place inside her to make her see stars. There were fireworks to match the ones they'd watched at midnight raining over Forks. Glowing sparks that burned bright.

Their coupling was fast and frenzied, leaving her with little choice but to hold on for the ride. His pistoning hips slammed into her beautifully.

Bella could feel herself sinking into the tree as they came together. It would have hurt if she'd been human, but with her enhanced body it felt no different than settling onto a feather mattress.

Her hands roamed under his shirt to slide over his back. Once again she marvelled at the smooth softness of his skin, except where they passed over scars. Her fingers loved tracing the calloused texture of the raised scars. It made his skin unique and intriguing. She loved that his body gave, just a fraction under the pressure of her wandering fingertips. Loved how she could feel the ridges of his muscles just beneath the surface. Love that he wasn't stone. His flesh felt normal, the same as her own.

Jasper reached back, freeing her hands for his shirt and pulled them up to close behind his neck, his fingers threaded through her own in a locking grip.

Bella kissed him, fusing their lips together. Their tongues danced, battling for dominance. The taste of him fueled her passion. He fed on her ramping desire, spilling his own so they both soared higher and crested the peak together.

She could survive on this alone for eternity.

Afterwards, they stood with their foreheads pressed together for a long time, savoring.

Bella's arms and legs remained locked around him in a vice grip.

Being with Jasper was heavenly.

More, she felt secure. He wasn't fickle with her. He didn't say one thing and do another till she doubted. There was unquestioning trust between them.

Slowly, she became aware of his fingers in her hair. They weren't tangled, more playful. He was rolling the ends between fingers and she felt his admiration. He did it a lot, unusually absently. In a way that let her know he found her long hair beautiful without having to hear an empty compliment or one given by rote. The gesture meant more than words.

"We have to head back," Jasper said, reluctantly disentangling them. He stayed close though, looping an arm around her waist and pulling her against his side. She brought her hand up to rest over his on her hip, interlocking their fingers.

Dawn was breaking. The sky was a pale grey with lavender clouds. Mist hung in the air making everything hazy and dreamlike. It wasn't the usual crisp, clear winter morning. Global warming in action.

The first day of the new year.

She could hardly believe the new year had started. So much had happened during the last twelve months. She'd started out alone and broken. More of a shell, or zombie, than a living, breathing person. She'd graduated high school. Gotten engaged, married, and divorced - Alice had given her papers before Christmas. They'd already been signed by Edward. His gift to her. She'd moved out of her dad's house. She'd almost died - more times than she could count. She'd gotten pregnant and had Renesmee. She'd started her life as an immortal. She'd fallen in love with the man she planned to spend eternity with.

The next year couldn't possibly contain as many surprises.

The pair walked hurriedly back to their cottage, needing to change before going to the main house. Mae had stayed up late to watch the fireworks ring in the new year at midnight, but she'd likely still be up as early as ever.

They'd started having Mae stay in her room at Esme and Carlisle's during the nights they hunted. Jasper was too worried about losing control of his emotions with Mae around to hunt at the same time she did. Bella didn't think it would happen, he kept such a tight leash on them the majority of the time, but it was his decision. It didn't hurt that she got to reap the benefits when they hunted alone. The feral, untamed side of Jazz was thrilling and… delicious. His emotions gave her an excuse to be a little wild and rebellious herself - not an aspect of her personality she'd indulged prior to turning. It was liberating.

"I'll miss this place," Bella said as she realized this was probably the last time she'd ring in a New Year in Forks.

"We won't be gone forever," Jasper said, releasing her so they could jump over a stream.

She didn't bother to correct his mistaken assumption. She knew they'd come back to Forks before moving. Her statement was regarding their permanent departure from the town. The place where she'd gotten to know her father, met the Cullens, had her daughter, and become the version of herself that she was destined to become.

"Promise me that someday we'll move back here," she requested.

"Whatever you want," he capitulated easily. "I'm pretty fond of Forks too." Perhaps he had known what she was referring to all along.

"We can't stay much longer even after we return," Bella acknowledged. The risk was too great that she'd be seen. And Carlisle was far too young for how old he was supposed to be. It'd be safer for everyone if they moved soon.

"No," Jasper agreed, not trying to lie to her about necessary truths. "Is there somewhere in particular you want to live?" he inquired, seeking her input regarding the next phase of their lives.

"It's my first move, so I'll leave that up to you guys. As long as the family is happy, I will be," Bella said. She honestly had no idea how the whole process worked. This would be a learning experience for her.

"What do you think of Whitehorse, darlin'?" Jazz asked, confirming her suspicions that he'd already begun planning.

"That I've never even heard of it," she said honestly, wondering if he'd made up the name just to see what she'd say. Should she know where that was? The public education system wasn't exactly known for prioritizing geography in its curriculum.

"It's in the Yukon, pretty remote - not like Forks, but not a bustling metropolis - and there's a good hospital for Carlisle, it's not too far from here," Jasper hesitated then added, "and it's near Alaska."

The conversation she'd had with Mae was fresh in her mind. She hadn't figured anything out, but it was solid evidence that Mae wanted to either know Edward or know about him. It'd be easier if they were within convenient travel distance of one another. Assuming Edward was even willing to get to know Renesmee.

Bella also knew it wasn't fair to keep the rest of the family from Edward just because she was angry. She'd let go of most of that anyways. Mostly, she was indifferent on the subject of Edward. He wasn't significant enough to bother forming an opinion about him. It was hard to care about him one way or another when she was so incredibly happy. But the others loved and missed him. She didn't really like the idea that she'd driven him from his family.

His actions had lead to things being what they were. But she had a daughter to consider, and Mae's needs had to come first. Which meant, something needed to change.

It helped that Bella knew Edward wasn't actually a danger to Renesmee. If he was, she'd hunt him down herself. The rest of the family be damned.

"That sounds promising," she finally concluded.

Jasper had respected her need to sort through the ramifications of his suggestion without trying to influence her one way or another. She appreciated the respect. He was always careful to let her make her own decisions and support her choices. Even when he felt differently, he was willing to discuss the difference and reason out a compromise. He usually ended up siding with her, but there had been a few times he'd used logic and a compelling argument to persuade her to his way of thinking. Like with Mae learning to swim or staying at the main house without Bella there the entire time. It was nice not having ultimatums, getting to have a say, and being respected enough to be reasoned with instead of dictated to.

"We don't have to decide now," he said, letting her know there was an out if she wanted to change her mind.

"I'm not going back to high school this first time," Bella said, suddenly dreading the prospect. She wanted to focus on being a mother to Renesmee for the foreseeable future, not maintaining a cover charade.

Jasper's laugh startled a nearby squirrel and it scampered quickly away through the underbrush.

"I thought the three of us might get our own place apart from the others, like we are now," he said once he'd stopped laughing, though she still felt his amusement. The vibes of horror coming off her must have been potent to provoke such a strong reaction in him. "Just be close friends of the Cullens. Or you could be Esme's sister," he suggested.

Bella liked the idea of still being related to the Cullens. She'd worked hard to become one of them. But she liked the idea of the three of them still living separate even more. They still needed the privacy space afforded. Probably would for at least another decade.

It was nice to plan for the future as if everything would work out. Nice to be optimistic about it. It gave her hope.

"Yes," she agreed simply.

* * *

Jake showed up at the cottage unexpectedly on the third, just a couple days before they were set to leave. He didn't even bother knocking before he let himself in and plopped down beside Bella on the sofa. She stared at him incredulously, but he just tipped the book she was holding enough that he could see the cover. It was _A Tale of Two Cities_. He looked bored by just the thought of reading it.

Mae was with Rose spending some last minute time together. Probably sledding since Mae wanted to enjoy the snow a bit more before they headed towards the equator and jungles. They'd miss each other terribly. So why was the wolf encroaching on Bella's territory now? And would it kill him to shower? Geez!

"Want to go for a run? I'll race you," Jake suggested, as if she wasn't giving him a withering glare for getting sweat on her couch. It was apparent he'd already spent the better part of the day running around outside.

"Why?" Bella asked suspiciously.

"Because it's fun to go fast, And I want to beat you?" he said, voice raising at the end until the statement sounded more like a question. More like he was second guessing his idea of coming over altogether.

Bella waited, wondering what was really up. Jake's expression fell a bit. He was obviously disappointed she didn't want to. Guilt ate at her.

"You wish," she said, taunting him. Instantly he perked up, primed for the challenge. But when she made no move to close her book or stand, he sighed loudly, drawing the sound out exaggeratedly.

"Come on, Bells! We don't hang out anymore. We haven't done anything just the two of us since before I went wolf for months on end. That was forever ago. Is it so weird that I want to spend some time with my best friend?"

"Sorry, yeah, sure we can, Jake," Bella said, giving in to the guilt trip he was laying on her. It was all true, and that made it easier to cave. Besides, she missed hanging out with him too. They'd always had fun, and now she was supernatural like him. It'd be great to test that out against one another.

Jake waited a beat, glancing at the book she still held, then bolted off the sofa and out the door. Bella huffed, shocked by the blatant cheating, then darted after him where she could easily see him navigating through the treeline.

They ran for miles. Bella was faster, but only barely. If Jake had been wolf, he'd have destroyed her. No contest.

They came to a stop at the top of one of the western peaks in Olympic National Park. The view was incredible. They could see all the way to the Pacific Ocean to the West and Canada to the North. Snow covered many of the nearby peaks, and there was a light dusting of fresh powder on the smaller one they were currently standing on. Evergreens stood tall and proud, untouched by industry and society. It was peaceful.

The strength in her limbs that had propelled her upward was as present as when she'd started. The knowledge made her feel invincible. Powerful. Bella spun in a circle, arms thrown wide. Alive. She'd never felt so alive as when she'd become a vampire.

Bella stopped when she caught sight of Jacob watching her. He wore a small, sad smile. She could almost imagine him saying, 'You were born for this life,' but instead his smile vanished all together and he took a deep, deliberate breath, bracing himself.

"Please don't make me beg," Jacob eventually said. Quietly. Calmly. There was a peace to him that hadn't been present before the imprinting. Nothing riled him the same way anymore.

"What?" Bella asked, not understanding his words.

"I've tried to be patient, to wait, to leave it up to you… but I have to at least ask - even if the reason you haven't brought it up is because the answer is no. Bella, please don't leave me behind. Let me go with you guys to help look for answers and help with Nessie. I need to -"

"Jasper's picking up your passport tomorrow when he gets Renesmee's," Bella said, interrupting him.

It was partially because he hadn't asked that she wanted him to go. He'd finally matured enough to handle the situation responsibly - to follow orders if needed and not start any unnecessary drama. The rest came down to strategy and comfort. It'd be safer to have the extra help. Jake could help out with things during the day that would keep Bella and Jazz trapped indoors. He could watch Mae while she and Jasper hunted since he wouldn't be comfortable with Mae around for that. And both girls would miss Jake if he wasn't there.

"Thank you," Jake said, relief making his shoulders slump forward even as his head fell back. "Your decision or Jasper's?"

"Both," Bella replied, smiling as she remembered Jazz asking if Bella wanted the wolf to come. She'd surprised herself by saying yes. Jazz had listened to her reasons, then added a few pros and cons, mostly regarding safety, of his own that Bella hadn't thought of. It hadn't been a long discussion before they'd both agreed that he should come. Jazz had set about making arrangements for Jake to join them that day. Bella had just forgotten to mention it to Jake with everything else going on. "We make important decisions together," she added.

"Well that's a bit different from before."

"We need someone to sniff out information during the day since we'll be stuck inside," Bella informed him, ignoring the not so subtle critique. It was the one thing Jake still did that drove her crazy - he loved pointing out that he'd been right in calling how unequal and wrong for each other Bella and Edward had been.

"So you're just using me. I get it now. Guess it's a good thing I arranged to take my finals with Seth the day after tomorrow," Jake said, picking up on her annoyance and willing to change the subject since she was giving him something he wanted more.

"Convenient," Bella said dryly. "Consider this your graduation gift then." At least that way she wouldn't have to worry about getting him anything. Jake could care less about school, so she didn't feel bad about dragging him out of what would have been his last semester.

"Graduation. Scary," he said with a mock shutter. "Guess that means I have to be an adult now."

"What are your plans?" Bella asked, suddenly curious about what he'd do once they moved. Was that why Jasper wanted to stay sort of close - relatively speaking? "When we get back," she clarified.

"College," Jake answered at once.

"Really? You've never mentioned that before," Bella remarked, unable to mask her surprise.

"Things are different now." Renesmee. The imprint. He didn't need to clarify. But then, that's why the idea of college surprised her so much. He'd have to leave them for that.

"Where? What are you -"

"I've got a few ideas in mind, but I don't really want to make any decisions until I know what's happening with Nessie."

"_Renesmee_ needs you to have your own life," Bella said, liking the idea of Jake getting some space from her. The idea of him watching her grow up then falling in love with her was still pretty strange to her. She just couldn't wrap her mind around it.

"Yeah, that's sort of the point of this," Jake muttered. "Look, can you drop it for now? I just want to wait till we know for sure she's fine. Then I'll tell you everything, promise."

"Sure, Jake," Bella said. "Home?"

When he nodded, they took off back towards the cottage, retracing their path. Bella, who'd never been particularly good at navigation - even after Jake taught her - loved how easy it was to simply follow the scent trail they'd left behind earlier.

When they reached their destination, Bella couldn't contain her curiosity a moment longer, and the question burst from her lips. "You're really going to go away for college?"

With a huff, Jake eyed her. Judging that she'd no intention of dropping the subject, he gave in.

"Yeah," he said strongly. "Look, given our history, I really don't think Ness and I will ever end up like... Rachel and Paul, for example," he mused, running a nervous hand through his hair.

"You don't?" Bella demanded, shocked.

"I'll have known her forever. It'd be too weird. Then there's the bit about us."

"Why do you think you imprinted then?"

"So she wouldn't feel alone," he answered at once. He'd obviously given it a lot of thought. Then his words registered, and she was abruptly angry.

"Alone? Really, Jacob?" Mae was constantly surrounded by her family.

"You and your family are vampires. She is supernatural too… but she's also part human - something you guys aren't. I can relate to her that way," Jake explained. She understood what he meant at once. The snap anger drained away as quickly as it had come upon her.

"I am glad she has that," Bella conceded.

"I think it was also important so we formed an unbreakable allegiance between the pack and your family. It helped me get over you so we'd be at peace and not war. We were already bound, but those ties are impenetrable now. If you guys ever need help, we'll be there. The same is true in reverse."

Bella nodded in agreement. Part of her felt bad that his imprinting was, in a way, a wasted opportunity for him. But mostly she was grateful things had worked out the way they had for her daughter's safety and happiness.

"So college?" Bella tried again, but at his look, dropped the subject. For now.

* * *

Shopping was a torturous affair.

Alice had taken advantage of Jasper needing to visit Seattle to pick up the passports, and had insisted she and Bella should go to the mall so Bella would have a chance to get accustomed to being around humans before the trip. So far she'd avoided them since her transformation. And now Bella's relationship with Alice's ex-husband meant she was in a peculiar position where she didn't have the heart to deny her sister any request Alice made of her. Even if the request involved something as dreaded as shopping.

The activity she already disliked was compounded by the fact that her throat was scorching her. The scent of human blood pressed in on her from all sides. It was inescapable. It was excruciating.

Not to mention having to deal with the nauseating scents of sweat, unwashed bodies, the food court, and perfume counters.

She really must love Alice to endure all of this.

If she ignored it, the pain lessened significantly, but Alice kept asking how she was doing, which only served to enhance the pain again. Her sister insisted it was good practice so she wouldn't get caught off guard. That was when accidents happened.

Despite the discomfort, Bella knew she was in control. It was marvelous to be able to still be herself and not be lost to the thirst the way other newborns were. It filled her with pride. Being a natural wasn't something she could say about anything when she'd been human.

But then there was the endlessly long list of things to remember to do to impersonate a human. Apparently, since her transition, she'd begun behaving every bit as alien and other as the Cullens always did.

Blink, fidget, sit, move her shoulders so it looked like she was breathing even when she purposely wasn't, slouch. All the things she hadn't even realized she'd stopped doing. Everyone had insisted on offering her suggestions when they heard Alice was taking her to the mall. It'd been a bit overwhelming to realize how different she'd become.

Alice had even made her wear contacts to cover the peculiar red-orange her eyes had recently turned. Like a dark marigold or a blood orange. The contacts clouded her vision and made her want to rub her eyes to dislodge the unwanted debris and murky film.

"Bella, this stop is for you," Alice said meaningfully as she guided her into a store decked out with entirely too much pink. "You'll need these when you're gone."

So far, Bella had pretty much zoned out on Alice, content to focus on her surroundings and bloodlust. And not the clothes Alice was purchasing or the ridiculous amount of money being spent in the single hour they'd spent there. But Alice apparently wasn't having any more of that.

The items in the store came into focus. Lingerie. And lots of it. Victoria's Secret. Alice expected Bella to shop for lingerie with her.

No way. Not going to happen. She just couldn't.

But the look of determination on Alice's face had Bella opening and closing her mouth without speaking. The protests dying on her lips. Alice knew she was about to resist and had no intention of letting Bella's discomfort sway her.

"My daughter and Jake will be there, Alice," Bella tried weakly.

"So?" Alice asked, undeterred.

"This isn't a romantic vacation!"

"It's called multitasking. You're supremely suited for the endeavor now."

Didn't Alice find this just as awkward as she did? Why was she insisting on helping Bella find clothes to entice the man Alice used to be the one enticing?

"Actually I'm very all right with this. This is… right," Alice said, seeming to read her mind. Bella wondered if it had anything to do with the conversation she'd overheard her sister having with Seth just before they left for the mall. That had certainly been enlightening for a number of reasons. "And it's not like I haven't already _seen_ you two having sex a hundred or more times now."

Bella didn't want to contemplate that last bit. But if Alice was all right with it, then how could Bella refuse. Besides, she'd never gotten out of anything before once Alice was determined. Why would now be any different?

The second she thought it, Alice clapped her hands excitedly, then began sorting through bra and panty sets in Bella's size with renewed purpose.

Bella refused to think about the fact that Alice had firsthand knowledge of what Jasper would like seeing her in. It was just too weird.

"Edward sent Mae a Christmas present," Bella mentioned at one point when Alice was looking back and forth between two corsets, deliberating.

She'd figured out that he'd had to have had help, and she suspected Alice's involvement.

"Did she like it? I couldn't see," Alice said absently, too busy discarding a leopard print garter belt to look at her. Her words were confirmation though.

Bella had told Jasper about it too, but he'd just smiled and nodded as though he'd expected it and approved. Bella could almost imagine him thinking, 'About time you came around, you stubborn ass'. She'd not said another word about it after that. She didn't really know what else to say. And now here was Alice acting as if it was normal too. Was Bella the only one that didn't automatically think Edward would go out of his way to be kind to Mae? Maybe she didn't remember things as clearly as she thought she did.

"She did," Bella finally said, eyeing the neon orange and yellow striped bra Alice had just snagged. Bella wondered how to make it vanish without Alice noticing. She flat out refused to ever wear it - not even if she was told it would end up Jasper's favorite. The thing was not at all her. She'd feel like a traffic cone in it.

"Bella…" Alice began cautiously. What was wrong with not liking the ugly bra? It wasn't like Bella was stopping her from buying the other ten. "He's been searching for answers too. Trying to help," Alice finally said, completely derailing Bella's line of thought.

"He has? Why?" she demanded.

"He loves her," Alice replied like it was common knowledge. "Edward knows he messed up. But he is trying to do right by her now. Please try to keep that in mind."

Bella didn't bother arguing. She never won against Alice. Memories flashed through Bella's mind though. It was like watching a flipbook. Times that Edward had messed up by acting rashly then gone overboard to make amends. Was that what was happening here? The fact that he was actively doing something to help Mae made it a lot easier to completplate forgiving him.

"There it is!" Alice cried, holding up a stormy grey scrap of mesh and straps and lace and wires. For so little fabric, it looked complicated to put on. Not to mention delicate. There was no way it would survive, but Bella could see its appeal. "This one you're going to wear tonight. He'll love it."


	17. 17: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

So this chapter and the next are the set up for part three of this story :)

Also, I worked on this chapter all day yesterday and it gave me an idea for a sequel that would follow Mae and her significant other - the first ten years of her life as she learns to live her own life and eventually falls in love. I only want to write it if there is enough interest because there are two other stories I want to write as well - another Jasper/Bella that starts during New Moon, and a Remus/Hermione time travel fic that happens post war for Hermione, where she goes back to during Order of the Phoenix.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 17 - Jasper

Loving arms embraced him. Jasper felt the maternal love encase him as Esme hugged him farewell.

She held on for a long time, unwilling to release him and face the coming separation. And he was content to let her, equally reluctant to part. It was nice being able to comfort the woman that had taken him in and offered him a loving home, and to feel the extent of her love for him.

There was fear too. She was undeniably worried about them getting in trouble and being too far away to help. Sadness as well at being parted from all of her children and granddaughter at the same time - she always preferred having them close by if possible.

"Look after them," she breathed, briefly squeezing him harder before stepping back. "And let them look after you," she admonished, poking a pointed finger into his chest for emphasis.

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper dutifully agreed, truly feeling like her son.

She chuckled and kissed his cheek a final time before going to Alice and enfolding her in her arms as well.

Carlisle gripped Jasper's shoulder, and said, "We'll be in touch soon."

Emmett offered a fist bump, and Rosalie nodded with a kind, wistful smile before the four moved to the line to board their plane. They were on the same connecting flight to LaGuardia Airport in New York and would separate there.

Bella, Mae, Alice, Jake, and Seth had already said their goodbyes to the other three while he was with Esme. They'd arranged things so that they'd also be on the same connecting flight to Mexico City before they parted ways as well, but their plane didn't board for another hour and twenty minutes so they were at the others' departure gate.

Jake entertained Mae afterwards with a card game while they waited. He was grateful the pup had come with. It'd be good for Mae to have someone to talk to and interact with who wasn't her parents. He felt terrible about depriving her of her family, however temporary, during this trip. And Jake was her favorite person outside of the family.

Mae slept the entire time once they'd reached cruising altitudes. She'd climbed on Jasper's lap, then leaned over the armrest to sleep against Bella's shoulder. It couldn't have been comfortable, but she'd hardly moved an inch.

They'd all spent the day before hunting so the plane rides would be easier to manage. Though Jasper hardly noticed his bloodlust these days. Not since Bella helped him overcome his old way of thinking.

But then Mae had refused to sleep at all the night before, demanding to spend the whole night together as a family. They'd watched movies, played chess and uno, and Auntie Alice had let Mae play in her makeup. It'd been a dream come true for Alice - finally a willing barbie doll to dress up.

He caught Seth's eye in the terminal once they'd landed in Mexico. Jasper's flight left first for Guatemala City, but he wanted to speak to the wolf privately before they had to head to their gate. Seth nodded, moving to join him.

"We'll be back in a few minutes," Jazz murmured to Bella when he felt her curiosity. She didn't question him, so the pair made their way through the crowds to find some privacy away from prying vampire ears.

Jasper remembered the other three times he'd been in an airport with Bella when she'd either been running from Edward or returning from chasing after him. This was the first time she hadn't looked half dead from fear and exhaustion.

He was so focused on his memories of Bella that it was easy to ignore the lust coming from a group of college-age girls watching him and Seth. It was only the annoyance he felt coming from the young wolf that clued him in enough to locate the source. Seth didn't like being admired by strangers. How curious.

Being with Bella had relaxed Jasper, and upped his confidence about being in public. The crowded flight had certainly been easier to ignore the tantalizing aroma of blood surrounding him on all sides. But this was actually the first time he'd been the target of amorous attention - it never happened when they repeated their schooling, blessedly. His perpetual 'back-off' vibe had always prevented it before. He found he didn't much care for it either.

A quick scowl at the girls had them all melting into puddles of terror instead.

It made him supremely uncomfortable to have women that didn't know the first thing about him desiring him. Lust was an empty emotion when it was a solitary feeling. And it was impossible to feel more without the intimacy of learning the other person. Love was so much more complex and intricate. Lust on its own, from someone he'd never even met, left him feeling dirty. In need of a shower. Or bleach.

Seth chuckled, "Nice."

Jasper just raised an inquiring brow, pretending he didn't understand, but Seth wasn't fooled and he chuckled again, shaking his head. Seth's sense of humor was highly enjoyable. One Jasper didn't feel a bit guilty in drinking up with his gift.

They were probably far enough away, so Jasper said, "Make sure she hunts twice a month. Alice can get lost in the future and forget that she hasn't and needs to."

Seth nodded at the advice, interest piqued. Jazz was so used to being the one that took care of Alice that it was… discomforting to know he'd be trusting another to do it now. The rest of the Cullens wouldn't be there to help either.

At least with Seth, Alice was more in control and had less trouble remaining in the here and now. And he trusted Seth to do right by her. He'd put Alice's needs first. Seth was very mature for his sixteen years.

And he'd be seventeen year before too long - the same age Edward had been when turned. The age Edward's development had been forever frozen at.

"And don't interrupt even if she looks scared. It's harder for her to understand what she's seen if she doesn't see all that she can," Jasper continued. "Sometimes she'll not realize she's completely zoned out and forgotten to continue engaging with the present. Or she'll take notes or draw pictures, so keep a pen and paper -"

"Jasper, you don't need to worry about her anymore," Seth interrupted gently. He was smiling, and Jasper felt tender affection from the wolf turned friend. And possibly family?

It took a minute for Jasper to realize Seth was indulging him.

"That's your job now?" Jasper finally asked, understanding that Alice was in good hands and he could stop worrying about his best friend, the woman who happened to also be his ex-wife and the one that helped him find Bella - his mate.

"Yes. And I intend to be great at it," Seth confirmed.

"I know," Jasper agreed. "I guess… good luck then?"

He didn't know if he'd meant the words to be more about winning his ex-wife over or for finding answers about his daughter. They seemed to work equally well for both circumstances.

* * *

The first couple weeks were spent letting Bella, Mae, and Jake experience more of the world. None of them had ventured away from the familiar before this. Jasper actually enjoyed helping them experience the unfamiliar and appreciate something different from their daily lives, yet equally wonderful.

They walked the streets each night as soon as the sun sank behind the horizon. Market places quickly became both Jake and Mae's favorite places. They were bustling with people, loud with everyone talking at once. Music played from everywhere and sometimes they'd see people dancing in the streets or in the small spaces between stalls selling wares. Small because the areas were always packed. People were everywhere. The sense of community was exciting to witness.

Jake was in heaven trying the assortment of foods offered, particularly the thick beef stew called pepian, corn on the cob coated in ketchup, mayonnaise and cheese called elote loco, and tapado, a seafood stew. He insisted on getting food each time he found something he hadn't tried before, and he was equally determined to have Mae at least sample each item. That was how they discovered that she enjoyed atol, a creamy liquid that served as a sort of meal in a cup as well as pupusas, a stuffed corn tortilla, but only when it was filled with cheese and beans.

The best part of their impromptu vacation had been when they'd gone to Antigua. Jacob had liked the chocolate museum best, of course. Both Mae and Bella, however, had preferred their hike up Acatenango where they'd watched Volcan Fuego erupt every twenty minutes or so all night long. The incandescent lava glowing against the blackened night sky and shining through the plumes of ash and gas. They'd even snuck onto a coffee farm on the night of Jake's seventeenth birthday and gotten him to eat a handful of green coffee beans picked right off the plant. He'd thought they were disgusting, and the face he'd made had Mae erupting into peels of laughter.

It was an enchanting preview for all the future trips they take once they'd finally found answers. There were so many other places to see and that he could show the girls. Because no matter what, they'd make sure Mae lived a full and happy life.

Jasper had to admit his favorite part so far had been the variety of animals to hunt. He'd tried jaguar, puma, and deer so far - in different areas of the country of course. It wouldn't do to over hunt and damage the native ecosystem. But he had to admit, jaguar had become his new favorite. It was the closest to human he'd ever had.

Bella had tried a howler monkey, at Mae's behest, and she'd only said interesting once she'd finished. He was planning to try one next. He was curious to know if it was the taste or how it had screamed while she drank that had elicited the single word assessment. He also wouldn't mind wrestling a crocodile just so he could tell Emmett about it later. His brother would be so jealous.

Mae had settled for drinking deer, but insisted that Jacob hunt with her. He'd done so without complaint, surprising Jasper. He'd been even more shocked when Mae had hunted willingly without once commenting on her dislike of deer blood while Jacob was around. In the past, she'd always let them see her martyr routine when she'd been forced to drink deer blood instead of donated human blood.

It really was useful to have him along.

He'd been particularly helpful once they'd started looking for clues in earnest. He could meet with people during the day and visit libraries, museums, record halls, and university offices that wouldn't let them visit after hours. Jacob was good at setting people at ease. Jasper could use his gift to achieve the same results, but for Jacob it happened naturally.

Unfortunately, it didn't actually do much for them.

The majority of the stories only reported that the Chorti, the local name for vampires, loved nature, kept to themselves, and would drink the blood of any that trespassed on their land.

At first they were able to discover more accounts of women becoming pregnant after relations with Chorti. Stories like the one they'd found while Bella was pregnant. These stories matched what Jasper had already read. Legends describing how the Chorti offspring used their metal-like claws to shred the flesh of the mother to free themselves.

They found three different places with the same records. You'd think there'd be more. It was such a promising lead. But the accounts never extended beyond the birth. It was as if the child came into being then vanished. Every time.

Frustrating didn't begin to cover it.

They'd spent nearly two months following leads east, all the way into Belize. But nothing new ever turned up. There was nothing about the supposed children after they'd destroyed their mothers. Nothing about how long they lived. Nothing about their aging. Nothing about if they could survive being bitten and changed into a full vampire to stall the aging.

Jasper didn't tell the other he was considering that possible solution, but he'd keep it on the table until they learned one way or another if it could work - he would not lose his daughter if they could prevent it.

The only thing they'd found that was even remotely close to the information they needed was a story Jasper had located about a half-Chorti being sacrificed at the age of seven. The original work had been lost, but the transcribed page was in the notes of an anthropologist at one of the universities they visited near Flores. If the child had only been half-vampire, then it stood to reason that the other half was human. Because seriously, what else was out there unless it was a werewolf like Jacob. It was the part about sacrificing that had set him on edge.

Why? What had gone wrong? What had driven them to end the child?

Would they be forced to do the same to Mae one day far too soon?

Only the idea of at least having seven years with Mae had allowed Jasper to maintain control long enough to share the story with Bella and comfort her when her fear spiked dangerously. Jasper had reminded her that it was just a story, so they didn't know if it was to be believed, but inside he felt his soul withering in protest right alongside Bella's.

That day Bella had gone out and destroyed a number of trees in an effort to work out her helpless rage. Standing idly by had shredded him like being tied to the back of a truck and dragged only a gravel road for miles while still human. Road burn. Serious, bone-deep wounds that festered agonizingly.

Ultimately, Jasper had masked his emotions, unwilling to burren Bella with trying to reassure him when she was sinking herself. For a couple days he'd let her learn to compartmentalize her own emotions before they leaned on each other to move forward again. They'd decided against sharing the information with Jacob or the rest of the family. Not unless it became necessary later down the road or if they found additional accounts saying the same.

The only true positive was that Mae's aging had finally slowed to a near normal rate that was only just the slightest bit accelerated if it even was at all. At first glance she looked twelve or thirteen, but a closer inspection would indicate her face still held a trace of extra youth - not baby fat, she'd never had that, just a softness that had yet to sharpen. None of that was very comforting since she was only born just under seven months ago.

* * *

April was half over and they were no closer to finding answers.

Currently, they were back-tracking to Guatemala City, double checking that they hadn't missed anything along the way. They should reach the city proper by early morning. Bella had told him after the last dead end that she only wanted to give it another week. If they still hadn't found anything, then she wanted to go home and regroup.

The rest of the family checked in with one another, at first every day. But the longer they went with the person on the other end saying, 'Sorry, I've got nothing', the less frequently they'd been staying in contact.

Carlisle and Esme hadn't had any luck with Amun and had returned to Forks at the start of February. It was a disappointing set back. At least the others were having a bit more luck.

Garrett had joined Rose and Em, and the three of them were scouring the midwest for a vampire named Joham that might possibly have answers. If the guy they'd met, Henry, was to be believed. The information was out of date though. Apparently Henry had met Joham eighteen years ago and had told him that he'd be heading to that region. It was hard to imagine he'd have stayed in one place for all that time. Still, it was something at least.

Definitely more than they had.

Alice and Seth were having the best luck. They'd met up with Zafrina, Senna, and Kachiri a couple weeks earlier and the trio were helping Alice search an area that they'd heard promising things about. They'd supposedly met a hybrid boy like Mae when he was a child. But this happened a very long time ago, and they'd heard nothing since. Still, their renewed confidence made the decision to leave Guatemala easier.

If there just weren't any answers to find, then Bella had said she wanted to be with the family. It wasn't fair that they were missing out on what precious little time they'd have with Mae, and it'd be better if they spent the time they had together.

"Papa, I'm tired. Can we please stop?" Mae asked. He could plainly hear the exhaustion in her voice and feel the answering waves of lethargy washing outward.

He didn't like being this close to the city and not continuing on. There was only an hour until sunrise and that was precisely how much time they needed to reach their destination. Their current location was where their kind preferred to linger, just on the outskirts. And he'd been picking up on signs that there were many others close by for the last hour. Faint, but undeniable signs. But one glance at Mae and he brought their group to a halt.

Renesmee was clinging to Jake's back. Whenever she was this tired, he was the only one that could carry her if they didn't want to end up with a cranky hybrid the next day. For a normally sweet-tempered, mild-mannered child, she was a downright bear if she went too many days not sleeping well. And right now it was over a week since she'd slept more than two hours a night without waking.

Jasper worried that he and Bella were the cause of her uneasy dreams. They'd become more and more tense the longer they went without answers, and Mae's natural intuitiveness had to have unintentionally picked up on it.

He also feared that his usual tight leash on his emotions had let up a bit too much. Allowing Bella to feel his emotions on a regular basis was freeing and definitely lent itself to their forming a deeper connection. But it also meant he was letting others nearby feel more of himself than he used to. It wouldn't typically matter, except currently he was worried sick about his daughter, and now that worry was plaguing her.

Jacob looked ready to drop too. They'd discovered early on that if the two were near each other and Mae couldn't sleep, then Jacob couldn't either. And while Mae could dose on and off at night while the others combed through books or spoke with people, Jake couldn't since he was too busy helping them.

"Jazz," Bella prodded, expression troubled. She stepped up and lightly touched his chest with one hand, the other stroking Mae's long curling hair back off her face. Bella's worry sealed his decision.

"This close to the city, we should be able to find a hotel quickly," he acquiesced, glancing around.

Between towns there was nowhere secure for them to stay. Jasper and Bella needed to remain out of direct sunlight, and Mae needed a bed to sleep. Or at least a sleeping bag, which was something they didn't have. If they had come across a place sooner, he'd have stopped them fifty miles back, before things got to this point, but there hadn't been.

Right now Jasper was really starting to regret ditching the car a few weeks earlier. They'd needed to reach a woman who was living in the jungle about twenty miles west of the small town of Chisec. She'd supposedly been a scholar focusing on Mayan legends and anthropology before undertaking a project that involved moving off the grid. Her interest in anthropology had Jasper wondering if she knew anything of the translated legend he'd unearthed. It turned out to be just another dead end.

The four of them had moved through the forest traveling with ease to a place no car could traverse. Mae loved running, said it reminded her of home, and had asked to continue traveling on foot or even try riding one of the local vans if they needed to be less conspicuous from then on out. Considering it was just as easy for them to travel on foot, Jasper and Bella had agreed to the request at the time.

At least if they'd still had the car Mae could have slept in the back seat though until they reached the city proper and were able to locate a hotel farther away from the local vampires. Hindsight, it'll get you every time.

But at least he was right just then. They were close enough to find something quickly. Within ten minutes they were settled in a room in Canalitos, Jake's snores coming from one of the double beds while Mae slept silently in the other.

Bella settled onto the couch beside him, seeking the strength and reassurance he willingly offered as he watched the local news. Instinctively, he wrapped an arm around her, and she pressed into his side letting him feel her love and simply her presence. It helped him relax immeasurably.

Yet the nagging feeling that something was wrong continued to plague him. And his instincts were usually spot on. Experience counted for much.

News station after news station reported the same disturbing facts. The signs were familiar. It was only a year ago that he'd seen similar reports on the news in Seattle. He was intimately familiar with the story. There was a war brewing. Only this time he could tell that it was warring newborn armies, not just one.

"What is it?" Bella asked, frowning at the television. She didn't know what to look for. Edward had sheltered her so much before, and she was still so new herself - though it was easy to forget. Her remarkable restraint was awe-inspiring.

Jasper pushed the thoughts aside and refocused on the current situation, explaining his conclusions. The more he spoke, the more concern he felt radiating off of Bella. He tried to use his gift to ease her a bit, but he could tell she was swating his attempts aside like an annoying fly. Her disapproving look had him stopping altogether.

"The humans think it's gangs and drug cartels," he finished.

"Is there a chance that it is?" she asked, a touch hopeful.

"No. There's no correlating rise in the number of overdose-related deaths. Why would they be fighting over drugs then not sell them? And the rising number of missing people?"

"It's too high not to be related to vampires," she finished, understanding. The numbers just didn't make sense for a city where the crime rates and current statistics didn't match.

"We need to leave this area. It's too volatile," he informed her. Thankfully they'd already made the decision to leave soon. They'd just be doing it a little early.

"Should we go now?"

In the hours he'd scanned the news the sun had risen fully. Even now he could hear evidence of the town folks going about their mornings. It might be more dangerous to risk moving now. Particularly without the car. Bella wasn't used to moving about in daylight without letting people see her shine.

"We're closer to the city than I'd like. We should wait," Jasper finally decided. "But let's go ahead and return to Forks tonight."

"It's that bad?" Bella asked, staring at their daughter.

"Yes. We shouldn't risk it," Jasper said.

"Alice -"

"Is blind," Jasper replied, glancing at the room's sleeping occupants, particularly the little girl Bella's gaze was still riveted on.

The soothsayer would be unable to advise them as they currently were. It was an issue Jasper was just coming to realize might actually be a problem for them. He'd gotten so used to relying on Alice to inform the family when trouble was brewing. He'd let his guard down. The knowledge that she couldn't help him find the answers he sought was understood, but he'd somehow forgotten she wouldn't be able to foresee any other dangers they might encounter since Jacob was with them. They needed to leave as soon as possible.

"I'll book the tickets," Bella said, pulling out her phone.

They spent the rest of the day in the room waiting for their evening flight. It wouldn't take them long to venture to the airport.

Mae was in much better spirits when she woke, particularly after hearing they were finally going home. Thrilled was an understatement to describe how excited she was to see her grandparents again in less than twenty-four hours. She'd had fun, but missed everyone terribly.

Maybe five miles out from the hotel Jasper smelled them. Vampires. And a lot of them.

He knew they'd been close. Hoped they'd be lucky enough to skirt around the two factions. Luck was not on their side.

He'd barely paused when he said, "Vampires, several."

"I smell them," Jake acknowledged. Every inch of his large frame was shaking. Short, sharp breaths zipped past the wolf's clenched teeth and his hands were balled into fists so tight the tendons pushed against his skin, attempting to burst free.

A battle waged within the wolf, a struggle for dominance between the desire to protect and the one to attack. Mae's hand covered Jake's before Jasper could stop her. In an instant the fight was over. Protection won out, and Jake was in control once more. Jasper didn't know if it was the imprint or if Mae showed the wolf something, but he was grateful for the return of reason.

"Go," Jasper said, nodding south for them to continue to the airport and away from danger. He didn't need to clarify what or who he meant, but he released a burst of urgency to accompany his words.

With no effort, Bella swung Mae onto her back, their daughter's arms and legs wrapping tightly around her mother and making her look like a monkey. Then Bella was off, disappearing from sight.

In tandem, Jacob and Jasper split, pressing forward to scout what was happening and ensure that the vampires in the area were properly distracted. He figured they were since he could smell smoke as well. The battle must have just ended. There'd be a celebration in the city later that night. Many humans would vanish. Spoils of war for the victors.

Unwelcome memories tried to surface, rising like ice cubes in a glass of water, but Jasper crushed them back down. The past had no place in his life tonight.

They were in a heavily wooded park that stretched outwards from the city until it turned into a true forest once it moved past the suburban communities ringing the downtown area. It provided ample cover from prying human eyes. Not that humans ventured here - unless they had a death wish - even without vampires lurking about.

Jasper had only inched thirteen feet forward when he spotted a figure cloaked in dark grey. It was a uniform he recognized. Volturi. A high ranking guard at that.

It was to be expected. The news reports indicated the situation had gotten severely out of hand. The Volturi seemed to be waiting longer and longer to intercede these days. It felt like a baited trap.

Jasper just couldn't figure out what they hoped to catch. What they hoped to accomplish by risking exposure and failing to uphold their own laws the way they were. It went against everything he'd ever believed of those in power in their world. Something soon would have to happen. They were approaching a pinnacle. If they weren't careful, they'd all go stumbling over the cliff's edge.

Reaching out, Jasper assessed the guard's emotions, seeking to determine if he was aware of Jasper and his family. Boredom. Impatience. Hatred. Jealousy.

His family was in the clear. The second the thought crossed his mind, he spotted another guard moving quickly through the trees some fifty feet away. Jacob had already spotted the second grey-clad vampire and was moving to follow him.

Glancing back, Jacob nodded at Jasper then continued his pursuit. Just then he was infinitely grateful for the imprint and Jake's presence here. Jake could deal with one issue while Jasper handled the other. Divide and protect his family.

Jasper's attention returned to the first guard. Recognition hit just as the guard's emotions shifted. Felix. The Volturi's muscle. And he'd detected Jasper.

Damn.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

There was nothing for it. He'd have to explain his presence to the guard. Aro would know he'd been there once he rifled through Felix's head. If Felix didn't believe the truth that he was just an innocent bystander, with the whole 'wrong place, wrong time' situation happening, then he'd have to attack. That was risky. Not to mention illegal. But there was no way he could let the guard carry tales that any of the Cullens had been involved with more newborn armies. The Volturi weren't fond of coincidences - not with the history between the two covens. Or second chances.

_Bzzz_. Jasper heard the vibrations of his phone in his pocket. The metal and plastic pieces shifting about and striking each other inside the case to cause the shuttering. _Bzzz_.

The caller ID shocked him. But then it shouldn't. He was alone now.

_Bzzz_. It rang a third time before he managed to open it. Worry and fear inched up his body, starting in his toes and creeping like ivy determined and relentless. It wouldn't stop its progress until he was entirely consumed.

If Alice was calling, then that couldn't mean anything good was about to happen.

"Alice, wh -"

"I know we haven't spoken since I parted ways with the coven," she interrupted to say.

The words confused him, but he forced a blank mask over his face. Felix was watching him, curiously. So the guard was listening. Probably to both of them. That meant the Volturi were listening as well.

Double, double damn.

Jasper searched the cryptic message for clues, but he didn't understand what she was trying to covertly tell him. He'd need more to go on.

"And the reason you're calling now?"

A muffled cry of pain sounded through the phone, only just barely audible. Jasper flinched, unable to stop the physical reaction. But he clenched his jaw, determined not to ask.

Seth better be keeping her safe. There'd be hell to pay later if something happened to Alice.

Her cry had been muffled for a reason. Whatever was happening to his ex-wife, she didn't want the Volturi knowing. Hopefully Felix hadn't heard.

"To say a proper goodbye. I didn't love you enough to _risk the coven by staying_ when Bella picked you over Edward after becoming one of us, after everything they went through with the _Volturi_. I had to _back off_ when you picked Bella. It hurt, so I left _without speaking up_," Alice said.

The words were sluggish, forced, pained. Was she scanning the future even then?

Certain words and phrases had been emphasized. What was she trying to tell him? What's more, what was she deliberately trying to make sure Aro knew?

As soon as he thought the questions, he heard Alice sigh in relief through the phone. So that was it. This was a message for both of them. Quickly as he could, he sorted the words until they could be seen in a new light.

She wanted him to know the Volturi were there - done. She wanted him to avoid Felix and not confront him. Strange, but he'd trust her to know best. As for the Volturi, she wanted them to know Alice and Edward had left the family. Why? She'd also relayed that Bella had been changed and that she was with Jasper now. Well, that would help make it more believable that the two Cullens had left. It would also circumvent them from wanting to check on the state of Bella's humanity since mentioning a Cullen would surely bring it up once more among the brothers.

Had there been anything else? Was he missing something?

Years of knowing Alice helped him enough to be able to improv the conversation and allow her to steer it where it needed to go without revealing too much.

"And do you regret leaving us?"

"No. I… "

Unsure. That was the only way to describe Alice's tone of voice. He hated hearing her sound like that. For her sake and theirs. If the future was this uncertain, then she must be struggling to find the best path out of their current predicament.

"I'm sorry that my relationship with Bella hurt you," he said, knowing the words he was saying had little actual importance just then. More, they were a means to stall. To buy Alice more time to search and see. They'd also reinforce the message they were giving Aro. He added, "Both you and Edward, to the point that you felt breaking all ties with us was the only option."

"But it did. I don't want to see or hear from you or any of the Cullens again. This is goodbye," she said suddenly, almost cruelly for Alice.

Jasper sucked in a sharp breath, but simply said, "I understand."

She hadn't meant it, he reminded himself. It was just for the sake of their audience.

"I know Bella is in the city, but you should _call_ her and tell her that it's time to go back to Carlisle. Neither Edward nor I will ever return even with you gone," Alice advised.

They had to return to Forks. Jasper had already figured that part out. But the way she'd emphasized to call Bella. Call, not go to her...

After a moment he understood. Alice didn't want Felix following him and seeing Bella. Or was it Mae she didn't want the Volturi finding out about? Jasper didn't care which it was. He didn't want the Volturi setting their sights on either of them.

"If you're sure," Jasper intoned.

"I am. I've met someone else and will be traveling the world with him as we meet new people," Alice said, a waiver in her voice. One that told him this was far from over.

Her statement also indicated that she would keep searching for answers. Probably about Mae and the situation they were now in with the Volturi. Just now he couldn't say which was more pressing. He didn't have enough information.

He'd have to wait. It was a position he was used to with Alice.

He sighed even as Alice kept speaking.

"_Call_ Bella. And _go_. _Immediately_," Alice said, disconnecting the call before the last word had finished sounding.

His attention snagged on the last word - immediately.

The action accompanying the word told him she'd meant business. He didn't bother to put his phone away before running towards the city. With his gift he checked to ensure that Felix wasn't following him. As soon as he was certain, he came to an abrupt halt.

In an instant he was dialing Bella.

Where was she? Had Mae been hurt? Had Jacob caught up to them yet? He'd feel a lot better if his girls had the wolf with them. Why had he never taken the time to teach Bella to fight? When they got home that would be the first thing he did.

The phone rang and he waited.

Bella might be in trouble. Mae was practically defenseless. Alice was blind to them. And he couldn't go to them. He was stuck waiting. Waiting for them to come to him.

So he waited.

Waited.

And waited.

Anything could be happening to them. But Alice had been clear. He was not to go to them directly. He had to trust that Alice had been working with more information than he had about the situation. Hard as it was.

Voicemail.

_Where the hell was his family?_


	18. 18: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

The last section is a little confusing. That's why you saw the conversation from Jasper's point-of-view first so you already know what gets said. Here it is from Alice's with all the possible ways things could have played out as well.

Sorry you still have to wait to see what's happening to Bella and Mae.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 18 - Alice

Alice and Seth left the city minutes after arriving. Hurrying straight from the terminal to the car rental kiosk. Alice would have liked to take the time to explore Rio with him a little, but the sun was already almost visible just beyond the horizon. It'd be up in earnest before they'd even get a chance to make it out of the city, and that was if they left immediately. Good thing she had packed her gloves and head scarf.

Sounds filled the air of a city just waking up, audible with her enhanced hearing even over the crowd in the airport with people trying to catch early morning flights out. Or maybe it was the din of a city that may have never slept in the first place. Just the sort of place she liked.

Relief filled her when Seth just nodded and went along with her plan. Most sixteen-year-olds pouted when things didn't go their way. Seth didn't. He may have wanted to come because he wanted to travel and see the world, but he understood that they were here for a purpose and they needed to take care of that first. There was a lot riding on their success.

The car they'd rented was decidedly not her first choice. Or even her hundredth.

No. Nothing ostentatious for her this time. No Porsche, no Mercedes, not even a BMW or Volvo. Instead, she, and a slightly cramped Seth, were driving a Fiat Mobi. And it was a dull tan on top of that. Supposedly, the color was called sand, which should have inspired images of beaches and tropical umbrellas in fruity cocktails - she liked the umbrellas if not the drinks themselves, but it looked dull and lackluster to her.

Originally, they'd been offered a Chevrolet Prisma, but when the employee saw the way Seth's impressive six-foot-four-inch head had to tilt sideways a bit to be able to sit in the seat, he'd offered them a trade. It wasn't much better. At least with the Mobi Seth could lean the seat back a little so his head didn't brush the roof. He'd just shrugged over the whole thing and said, "Whatever works."

So no, the car was definitely not her usual. But Seth had talked her into it by pointing out that people would open up to her more if she wasn't her usual over-the-top self. She needed to put them at ease if she expected them to spill their secrets, not intimidate them. If this weren't so important, she would have argued about where the fun was in making it easier.

She also didn't mention that if all else failed, money always talks.

Still, after a momentary pause to stare at the car in distaste, she'd gotten behind the wheel and begun the journey along the coast.

The first stop was a visit to Kaure, the woman that maintained the house on Isle Esme. Shocked was a mild way to describe her reaction at finding them on her doorstep. Terrified would be a much more accurate summation.

She hadn't believed Alice that Bella had recovered just fine from her trip. And Alice couldn't show her any pictures since the changes in Bella were so pronounced. In the end, it was Seth that got the rattled and suspicious woman to open up. She seemed to recognize something in him that matched with the legends of her people. Plus, it helped that he clearly wasn't a vampire. She wished she'd thought of that benefit beforehand. If she had, she'd have asked Seth to come help herself.

Unfortunately, Kaure had already told Edward everything she remembered, and he'd already relayed the information to them. Kaure suggested they visit her hometown of Coari if they wished to speak to others that believed in the old legends as she did and learn more.

They set off at once, traveling northwest into the Amazon. It took almost two weeks to get there. Seth insisted he could sleep in the car since they were only stopping each night for his sake, but one look at the way he was already sitting scrunched up like a pretzel for ten to fourteen hours a day made it impossible for her to make him do it. They weren't so pressed for time that she couldn't spare him a few hours a night where he could stretch out across the bed. Because seriously, she'd swear he'd grown a few more inches in the last year. He was an inch taller than Jasper now.

It also gave Seth a chance to shift and talk to his sister, and occasionally Jacob. Leah and he at least tried to catch up everyday. His sister was worried about Seth traveling alone with a vampire, so hearing about him helped put her mind at ease. But Seth reported that Leah was happier than she'd been since before Sam shifted and left her. The distance really was helping her heal. And Edward kept her on her toes, and gave her an outlet. They didn't pull any punches with each other, and she'd been able to work out a lot of her resentment.

Once they finally arrived in Coari, they spent another week speaking to everyone that might know anything. Of course they only spoke to Seth. A fact he was a little smug about. In the end, they had three different stories of women falling prey to a vampire's amorous attentions that had been collected from throughout the Amazon, bartered for throughout the history of the Ticuna people in that area.

The first woman was accidentally killed during one of their encounters. Her mangled body was discovered after the fact, with limbs broken and organs crushed. She'd also been drained of blood. Alice shuttered to think that that could have been Bella's fate if Edward had lost control for even a millisecond. The look she'd shared with Seth told her his mind had gone to the same place.

The other two women became pregnant, but the fetus's growth rate took such a toll on the mothers' bodies, that they died. Either from malnourishment, or from the fetus unintentionally delivering a fatal blow from the inside out the way Mae almost had.

Regardless, none of the legends included a child surviving long enough to be born, let alone long enough to grow up. A dead end.

It'd be so much easier if she could just see!

From there they continued west into Peru, unwilling to give up. Each town they visited was based on the recommendation of a person they'd spoken with in the previous town. By the end of February they'd given up trying that route. It yielded no results.

They decided Alice's unreliable visions would probably stand a better chance.

So at night while Seth slept, Alice would search each direction, seeing what they'd find and looking for a path that vanished. The fact a path usually did vanish gave them hope that there were still answers to find. Because what else except for locating another hybrid would cause the path to disappear?

Once they had a direction, Seth or Alice would spend the next day driving into the unknown. So far they were primarily heading south. By the time March was half over they'd made it as far as Argentina. Periodically, she'd check throughout the day to make sure that they were still headed in the right direction. Every once in a while her vision would indicate that they needed to backtrack. When that happened, they would stop and spend the day exploring the area. But it was always the same. Nothing.

For the most part Seth kept his interactions with her deliberately platonic. No more sweeping declarations or grand gestures. He seemed to sense that she had enough on her plate and couldn't handle trying to process a change in the dynamics of their friendship right then. It was a welcome respite, and a relief to be able to count on him when needed. There was nothing awkward, no admissions to cloud the air or hurt feelings to tiptoe around. He didn't push, just provided exactly what she needed when she needed it.

Honestly, the maturity he displayed served to make her like him all the more. He understood her without needing to be told. It gave her hope that someday they really might be able to have something lasting and worthwhile.

It even helped Alice second guess her fears. He'd been so certain that he wouldn't imprint. And maybe he wouldn't. But even if he did, Alice was starting to believe he really would always pick her over any other woman.

She still worried about the age, but Seth would be seventeen in a few months. If you went with the age she'd been turned into a vampire at, the age difference between her and Seth now was the same as the difference between Bella and Jacob, and no one thought that was overly unusual or anything to freak out about when he'd still thought he was in love with her last fall.

Even though Seth didn't come right out and say anything, there were times that he'd watch her with an awed expression. He made her feel beautiful, the way Rosalie was. Flawless. Remarkable. Not the half-starved girl with the hair shorn to prevent lice that'd been trapped in a dark hole for months prior to being frozen into this life.

And the first time he'd seen her in the full light of day, well, that was a memory she'd cherish forever. The sunlight was vastly different here than the typical day in Forks. She hadn't realized until it was happening, that Seth had never seen her sparkle. Not until he raised his hand to try and touch the shattered, refracted rainbows glittering in the air around her like a halo. He knew vampires did that in the sun, but he hadn't seen her. Truly, it was like she was being seen for the first time in her life.

She didn't know anyone could make her feel like that considering the sheer amount of attention her family typically lavished on her. Central. Special. That's how her family had always made her feel. But with Seth, she felt miraculous. Essential. A single brush of his hand or penetrating look left her giddy.

It was the little things too. One day he insisted they stop at a table that had been put out by the road in front of a lonely little house miles away from its nearest neighbor. The table had been covered with handmade items for sale. Seth had splurged to buy her a beautiful scarf woven from alpaca fur that had been dyed in a rainbow of colors. It was to be a replacement for the solid navy scarf she'd brought to shield her skin from human eyes in the sun since he said hers didn't do her personality justice. Alice had worn the replacement every day after that.

Then there was the way he helped her handle her reluctant sight. She couldn't see the hybrid, if one existed. Though she tried. And her efforts were rewarded by the brutal feeling of having her skull split apart.

It was the hardest part of the trip so far. It was agonizing. Debilitating. Infinitely worse than it had been at home during Bella's pregnancy. Her head felt ready to explode every day. A wrecking ball was pendulating through her brain to bounce off every bone, swinging relentlessly.

Too many things that she couldn't see were demanding to play out in her head. They'd try, then get stuck, like a skipping record. Static and screeching. The wrong radio frequency was echoing through her mind with the volume rising steadily. Escalating till the clamor resulted in physical symptoms.

There were times it was so consuming that her inner sight and her literal vision in the real world would go black and she'd be unable to form words.

Neither of them understood why it was so much worse here than it had been at home. Alice had called Carlisle, and he'd theorized that it hadn't been so bad at home when Bella had first gotten pregnant because there was still a chance that she might not have Mae, so it hadn't been so impossible. Then, once it was truly certain that Bella would, and when everyone else making decisions that could impact things were on board with it, the wolves had been around and their presence offered her relief so she hadn't noticed. Carlisle also pointed out that Alice hadn't been trying to see once the wolves came around and Bella was so clearly determined. It had just been the visions that came to her naturally. Now she was actively seeking out something her mind couldn't process.

At first, she'd tried to power through the pain and blackouts, for lack of a better description. But after a week of near constant pain and nothing to show for it, Seth had demanded that she let him help her. He didn't ask that she stop, knowing how important it was, just that she let him help her through it.

After that, whenever the pain started to amp up, he'd come sit right beside her for an hour or so. He watched her like a hawk, going so far as to forego a full night's sleep to be able to help. The second her forehead started scrunching, he was there, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and offering a brief rest and respite. Just long enough for it to fade enough for her to breathe easy before trying again. The rest of the time he kept his distance, knowing she required it to be able to try and see anything.

As March came to a close, they entered the northern Patagonia region of Argentina. It was there that she and Seth experienced one of times they needed to backtrack. The pair had split up to search the woods near San Carlos de Bariloche.

"Alice, I think I found something," Seth said excitedly, running up to her.

"You found one?" Alice asked, incredulous.

"No, but I found evidence of vampires. The trail is about a day old, but I scented three of them. Didn't Carlisle say to look for a coven of three?" Seth asked, undiscouraged.

"Yes! Did you follow it at all?" Alice asked, already moving in the direction he'd come from.

"No, I thought it might be better if you went first. I don't want them to think I'm trying to threaten them," Seth said, taking the lead to show her where the trail started, then falling back to shadow her. It was smart, strategic. It reminded her of her favorite quality in Jasper.

Though Alice couldn't sincerely believe that anyone would find Seth threatening, even if he could turn into a wolf the size of a horse in the blink of an eye. He was just too cuddly, as a person and a wolf.

They followed the trail for nearly a day before they found them. Stumbled across them more like.

They were tall, long limbed, long faces, and fluid as the flowing waters of the Amazon. While they towered over Alice, Seth still topped them by a few inches. Silky black hair cascaded around one's shoulders, but the other two had theirs plated in a thick braid trailing down their backs. They wore animal skins that tied on the side.

There was an animal-like predatory aspect to the intensity with which they looked upon Alice and Seth, but they allowed them to approach regardless. Alice just knew they'd strike, with the speed and suddenness of a snake if they deemed her and Seth threats. She ideally wondered if they'd decide in time for her to see it. Part of her suspected she wouldn't.

"Hi, guys," Seth tried, and Alice swallowed a laugh. Instead she rolled her eyes and walked right up to the middle figure.

Sticking her hand out, Alice said, "I'm Alice. Carlisle Cullen's daughter. I think you met him a long time ago?"

They studied her for a very long minute before the middle one suddenly caught Alice's hand in a rapidfire motion, briefly clasping it before she whipped her head to look at each of the women flanking her.

"We do," she finally said. "I'm Zafrina. This is Senna," she said, nodding to the shortest woman, "and Kachiri," she finished, nodding to the tallest among the group. The movements were fast and jerky, more animal than human. In no way did they try to blend in and act as what they used to be before their changes.

"It's nice to meet you. This is Seth - he's a werewolf, but you know, the good kind."

They looked momentarily intrigued, and Seth laughed outright at the assessment. Hearing it seemed to relax all three women.

"Why have you come?" Zafrina asked. Alice was quickly realizing that she would be speaking for all of them, the same way Carlisle always spoke for the Cullens when they met strangers.

"We need your help," Alice said. Even though she couldn't see their reaction with Seth there, she inherently knew they'd be trustworthy.

"If you're willing," Seth added before she could elaborate. "And please be willing. We could really use it."

When they didn't come out and ask, Alice explained. "My niece is half-vampire, half-human. A hybrid. I love her, but she's aging - quickly," Alice said, swallowing a mouthful of venom that threatened to choke her with emotion as she relayed the problem. It helped that they'd not reacted at all when she'd described a hybrid. Only someone familiar with one would not immediately deny the possibility of such a being existing. Could they have witnessed one for themselves? "Will you help us find another like her so we can figure out a way to help her?"

"Please," Seth begged, giving them his best innocent puppy eyes. Alice elbowed his side to make him stop trying to help her.

But it seemed to do the trick. The three women watched their playful interaction with undisguised fascination. They were intrigued.

Zafrina glanced at Kachiri, and the woman gave a single nod of consent.

Alice felt like cheering. It was all she could do not to bounce on her toes, squeal in delight and clap her hands enthusiastically. Sometimes it was hard to keep it all in. She felt too much for her small body to contain.

"Long ago there was a boy. I don't know if he still lives, but we will help you search for him. We came across him much farther south. In Chile," Zafrina informed them.

"Alice," Seth whispered, catching her hand in his. She didn't pull away, simply enjoyed sharing this first real bit of good news with him.

* * *

The next week or so was spent traveling as a group. They'd abandoned the car. The Amazon coven wouldn't have felt comfortable traveling any way except on foot. Seth had been a good sport about it, even when Senna had given him a slightly condescending look when they'd told the women that they'd have to stop each day for him to sleep.

The look only served to make Seth all the more determined to get her to talk to him. He tried a couple times everyday, but she never responded. It had quickly become clear that only Zafrina would speak to them. Occasionally, they heard Kachiri speak to Zafrina, but Senna never said a word. It was an interesting dynamic between the three.

They were more like one person than three separate individuals. Alice admired their loyalty and devotion to one another. It was more intense than she usually saw in the covens she'd met that drank human blood instead of animal blood.

It was night and they'd just settled in around a small fire for the evening. The air was colder this far south. The snow capped mountains reminded her of home. Though the glacial water forming many of the lakes was much prettier here than what she'd seen back home. More murky and ethereal. A soft blue from the light reflected off the silt suspended throughout the water.

Zafrina said they were getting close to where they'd first encountered the boy, though they'd not come across him since. Alice was impatient to find him. The reminders of home made her miss her family. She suspected that Seth missed the pack and his own family as well, though he'd never admitted it. He seemed content to just be with her, but they were both very social people, and the Amazons weren't the best company.

Even though they were traveling together, they kept mostly to themselves. Some nights they talked to Alice, about her diet, life with the Cullens, the wolf packs, Renesmee, their history. But usually they went off on their own for a while, and she was left listening to the sounds of the forest and Seth's steady breathing.

Luckily, they'd been respectful enough to do their hunting at night too. About a week ago. Alice knew Seth could tell they had gone when he'd woken up and seen the deeper red of their eyes, but he didn't mention it. Guilt ate at Alice. It was probably killing him to stand by and do nothing, and say nothing, while humans were killed. But he did.

For her sake. For Mae's sake. For Jake's sake.

For a while Alice tried to see again, but nothing relevant was coming through. She'd taken a break from her relentless searching once they'd met up with the Amazon coven, content to follow their lead for a while. The only time she searched now was while Seth slept so he wouldn't know to be worried about her.

"Does what you see always come to pass?" Zafrina asked, coming over to join her by the fire. Neither needed the warmth, but Alice wanted to remain near Seth, and he liked having it. Said it reminded him of the bonfires at First Beach, even if the flames weren't blue from salty driftwood.

"So long as the person doesn't change their mind," Alice informed her, a bit ruefully because that really made all the difference.

"And you can control who you see and when the visions occur?" Zafrina inquired, tilting her head like Alice was a complicated puzzle she intended to solve.

Seth yawned and sat up, startling her. She hadn't realized he was still awake, though judging by his blurry eyes he'd be out soon. He grinned sleepily at her.

"I can force it," Alice replied, returning her attention to Zafrina. "But if I'm not around Seth then they never really stop. Some are more significant and detailed than others. Occasionally a little insignificant flash that I can almost ignore entirely. It's sort of an always thing - more or less."

"Can none of you do anything? You don't have gifts?" Seth asked, curious.

Zafrina stared at Seth, intently. Waiting. His eyes sort of glossed over and his breathing picked up. Alice almost asked what she was doing to him, but Seth didn't look upset, so she let it play out.

Then he was back, blinking and glancing around. When he saw Alice, scarlet infused his cheeks, burning bright. And his eyes. Desire. Blatant need. For her. The way he was looking at her made the venom in her mouth dry up completely.

That had never happened before. She ran her tongue experimentally over her teeth. Nothing. Huh. How interesting.

Realization seemed to dawn on him, and he ducked his head, rubbing the back of his neck indicating his growing discomfort.

It was the most he'd overtly he'd shown his interest in her since they'd left Forks. Alice didn't quite know what to think. What had Zafrina done to him?

"So you play out people's fantasies?" Seth asked, braving any mockery he might get. He seemed to already know she was aware of what he'd seen.

No," Zafrina said. The single word held a note of finality to it.

"Oh," Seth said, understanding making him flush all over again. "Uh, okay. Night, pixie," he mumbled, laying down and rolling away from them.

Alice eyed Zafrina, but the woman just winked at her, smiling secretively.

She didn't know what to make of being the subject of Seth's fantasy. To know he wanted her sexually. It wasn't news to her or anything, but still…

A little while later, once Alice was almost certain Seth was actually sleeping, she brought it up.

"You shouldn't tease him like that."

"Why not? It was amusing," Zafrina said, shrugging indifferently.

"He's a really great guy. I don't want him to be the butt of your joke," Alice said, infusing the words with steel.

"You're protective of your mate. Though I've never heard of one of our kind being with one such as he," Zafrina said, nodding in approval, though Alice noticed she was still a little skeptical of Seth's wolf aspect.

Then the word hit her. Mate. The Amazons thought Seth was Alice's mate. Which wasn't true. Because they weren't. A couple. Or even together. Not romantically.

"He is _not_ my mate. I mean, we're not together like that," Alice denied quickly, shoving the words out in a rush. "Seth is just my friend," she clarified as adamantly as she could.

Zafrina eyed her doubtfully, but all she said was, "My mistake."

After that night, Seth was decidedly awkward around Alice. He wasn't standoffish, exactly. But there was a distance that hadn't been there before. New barriers that somehow seemed impregnable. Seth was on one side and she was on the other. He still smiled and joked. He didn't ignore her or act jilted and betrayed. But he was less bright than before. Diminished. Less… Seth.

And Alice knew he'd heard her denial of him.

* * *

A sudden vision brought Alice up short as she was walking towards Seth's campfire that night. A fuzzy, horrifying scene played out in front of her eyes.

"_Though it saddens me greatly, the Cullens must be destroyed for this - starting with Bella. Unless she chooses to join us instead. Then we will spare her," Aro said, spreading his hands before him like he was a helpless puppet simply following the will of his master. _

_Though that couldn't be further from the truth._

_Caius nodded in agreement while Marcus watched on passively. _

"Seth, get back - I have to _see_!" Alice cried, knowing he'd comply and having confirmation the second she touched her phone to call and warn Bella that she had to stop whatever it was she was about to do.

"_A half-breed and a werewolf? We won't stand for this. The Cullens are building an army against us!" Aro cried. An audience of assembled Volturi guards was spread before him. _

_The moment the words left his lips their faces contorted into rage, whipped into a lathering frenzy by the very idea._

"_We must destroy them all before they attempt to move against us," Caius urged, lips twisted in disgust and hatred, though he was eager with undisguised anticipation and bloodlust.._

No!

Alice blinked furiously, erasing the awful scene from her sight. That was the wrong decision.

She couldn't call Bella. Somehow that would lead to the Volturi learning of Mae and Jacob. They wouldn't understand. They wouldn't want to understand.

She had to pick a different path.

Jasper. What if she warned Jasper instead?

The vision came to her at once, clear as any that would happen regardless of others' decisions. This was the future that wanted to happen naturally now that she'd made this choice to interfere. The same way her vision of the porch swing with Jasper and Bella together had been.

"_I trust there were no problems?" Aro asked, glancing from Felix to Jane. The first looked uncertain, but Jane appeared furious with her teeth clenched and fists balled like a petulant child. She looked younger than Mae in that moment._

"_Not with the newborns," Felix answered cautiously._

"_And Santiago? Why has he not returned with you?" Marcus asked, bored, from his seat in the receiving room of their Volterra fortress._

"_He burned," Jane spat, seething._

"_What happened?" Aro demanded, righteous concern radiating from his person._

_Jane moved to speak, but Felix spoke over her, stepping closer to Aro. "Jane was destroying the last of the newborns. He was searching the area to find any that had attempted to flee our retribution. When Jane and I found him, he'd already burned," Felix explained._

_Aro reached out expectantly, and Felix did not disappoint, putting his hand into his master's. After a moment Aro's expression morphed into one of shock and… hope?_

"_A Cullen was in the area," he announced to his brothers, summarily dismissing Felix. Jane looked shocked at the news, and even more enraged to only just be hearing about it. Greed shone on Aro's face, however. "At last we have an opportunity."_

Alice knew at once he was referring to her. Whatever was happening, Aro thought he could use it to acquire her.

The recognition let her see a little more, though this bit was much less clear. More malleable somehow. The decisions leading to it hadn't been realized yet. They could still change.

"_If they were involved with the armies, then we must end them. They've interfered and flouted our ways too many times," Caius decreed._

"_We shall all go. To ensure Alice and Edward, perhaps even his mate, Bella, understand the only path to forgiveness is through joining the guard. Alice must join us," Aro agreed eagerly, his words covetous._

Aro wanted her. He'd just been waiting for an opportunity to put a plan into motion to force her into joining the guard. This was exactly what he'd been hoping would someday happen. The Cullens in a compromised position. The only way he wouldn't succeed was if she was gone. If both her and Edward were gone.

She'd have to figure out a way to stop him. Make sure he heard that she'd left the Cullens.

The decision spurred a final clip, the way some movies add a bonus scene after the credits have rolled. It started just before the other scene had ended. A rewrite of sorts. One that was extremely clear - another bound to happen event.

"_A Cullen was in the area," he announced to his brothers, summarily dismissing Felix. Jane looked shocked at the news, and even more enraged to only just be hearing about it. A wrinkle creased Aro's brow as he contemplated what he'd seen. _

"_How are they involved?" Caius demanded._

"_Who?" Marcus inquired, though he looked bored rather than curious._

"_Jasper. But Alice has left him - and the Cullens," Aro absently answered. He looked troubled, uncertain._

"_Have they finally turned the human?" Caius demanded._

"_Hmm? Bella? Yes," Aro said absently, waving the point aside as if it were no use to him._

The scene ended, needing more decisions to fuel it further. The way a hurricane needed a water source. But she had enough to know that Jasper was the one to warn. And she had to make sure Aro understood she was gone. Broken from Jasper, and Carlisle too.

She was dialing his number before she'd even finished processing what needed to happen. Plotting, even as she heard Jasper answer, "Alice, wh -"

Terse. The tension told her that Jasper already knew the Volturi were there. Felix. The burly hulk of a guard must be listening. This conversation must be what Aro saw when he touched Felix's hand. It was the only thing that made sense.

Damn. That made things _so_ much harder. She'd have to watch her words, and it meant they truly couldn't avoid what she'd seen happen. It was already too late for that. Or was it?

"I know we haven't spoken since I parted ways with the coven," Alice said carefully.

Silently she begged Jasper to pick up on the double nature of the call. She'd deliberately said coven and not family to help convince Aro she had no further ties with them.

"And the reason you're calling now?" he intoned, the words an unspoken plea for her to give him more to work with. But it was enough to know he was with her in this.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Jasper, for understanding her so well.

Now, to see if they could change what she'd just seen. What would be the best decision?

What if she told Jasper to kill Felix before he could show Aro anything?

"_He thought to stand against you? Against _us_?" Aro cried, looking at the four before him while Marcus and Caius watched from their seats on either side of him. Caius, though, sat forward on the edge. A child at the movies, awaiting the dramatic climax._

_Felix and Santiago each held one of Jasper's arms out to either side of his body. He hung, suspended from their meaty grips. Their fists were the only thing keeping Jasper from sinking to the floor in a withering, broken heap. Jasper's legs were limp, twisted oddly and useless. He was shaking, eyes coal black in sunken orbits. He looked tortured, hollowed out and refilled with fire ants and burning coals._

_Because that's precisely what was happening to him._

_All the while Jane stared directly at the blond Cullen, a smile playing on her vicious lips. Likely had been blasting him with her gift of pain ever since the two Volturi guards had bested him. And Jasper's gift would only make the pain feel that much worse. Enhancing and amplifying it to unbearable levels._

"_He lacks respect. The Cullens must be shown their place," Aro announced, nodding at another in the room._

_At once the large male, Gaius, stepped forward, reaching to place his hands on either side of Jasper's head just as Jane finally looked away. Relief filled Jazz's expression as he looked up to meet Gaius's punishing burgundy eyes. With a great wrench, Jasper's head came away clean from his body. The guard tossed it to the ground carelessly. The emphatic Cullen's head rolled, coming to a stop when Alec put his foot down on the rolling object the way one would stop a soccer ball._

"_Shame the other put up such a fight. They could have burned together," Jane said._

"_Yes, I had hoped to meet Isabella and see her change for myself. Perhaps a little more restraint next time, dear one?" Aro said, mildly scolding the girl._

_Then Jasper's headless body was burning. Flames consumed him as easily as if he were made of paper mache. Burned with the agony of the change._

With a muffled cry Alice was free from the horrifying scene. She glanced down to find she'd bitten her own hand to stifle her scream of protest. It must have been the pain of her own venom that freed her from the nightmare vision, because it hadn't been done with her, and Seth was still fifty feet away, respecting her earlier demand. Though looking at him now, she could see the way he was straining against himself, physically shaking with the effort to honor her wishes.

She held up a hand to stay him, and he nodded, though he looked miserable about being asked to do it.

As quickly as possible, Alice analyzed what she'd seen.

If Jasper fought Felix, he'd lose when Jane interceded and the other guard, Santiago, joined them. Bella had tried to help and been killed for it. They weren't mentioned, but did that mean Jacob had been able to flee with Mae? Regardless, it was not a future she could allow to happen.

She'd need to keep Jasper from fighting Felix, and any decision that would lead them to Bella.

Easier said than done.

So what could she say?

"To say a proper goodbye. I didn't love you," Alice began, the words a bitter lie on her tongue. All the more foul for having just witnessed his potential death. The memory spurred her on, and she continued, "enough to risk the coven by staying when Bella picked you over Edward after becoming one of us, after everything they went through with the Volturi. I had to _back off_ when you picked Bella. It hurt so I left _without speaking up_."

Part of her was babbling, too desperate for Jasper to leave and avoid that fate to make sense, but she hoped he understood what she was really telling him. Go. Now. Leave Felix.

_Please, Jasper, understand_, she silently willed.

No new visions that were worse than the last occurred, so she sighed in relief. He must have understood enough to have decided against attacking Felix.

"And do you regret leaving us?" Jazz asked blankly. He was giving her an opportunity to relay more information. Was there anything else they could do? Somehow she knew an axe still hovered over their heads, waiting to fall.

Could she tell him to find Santiago before he was killed? That was why Aro had even been told about Jasper.

She looked, the vision seemed to be waiting for her to call on it, like an eager student waving his hand in the air for the teacher to call on him.

_Jasper was running, phone still pressed to his ear. Felix hesitated, looking surprised, but he quickly shook it off and raced after Jasper's retreating back. Blackness._

"No. I…" she said, stalling and uncertain what her next move should be.

The warning would lead them to Mae. Or Jacob. She'd already seen how that played out. Which meant Santiago was going to die somehow, and Aro would be told Jasper had been seen.

"I'm sorry that my relationship with Bella hurt you. Both you and Edward, to the point that you felt breaking all ties with us was the only option," Jasper said slowly, drawing each word out like he was buying her time. He probably was considering how well he knew her, so she largely ignored him. There was too much else to focus on.

What if she just told him to go home?

Again the scene played out beginning just before the earlier vision left off. Seemed that much at least was bound to happen.

"_A Cullen was in the area," Aro announced to his brothers, summarily dismissing Felix. Jane looked shocked at the news, and even more enraged to only just be hearing about it. A wrinkle creased Aro's brow as he contemplated what he'd seen. _

"_How are they involved?" Caius demanded._

"_Who?" Marcus inquired, though he looked bored rather than curious._

"_Jasper. But Alice has left him - and the Cullens," Aro absently answered. He looked troubled, uncertain._

"_Have they finally turned the human?" Caius demanded._

"_Hmm? Bella? Yes," Aro said absently, waving the point aside as if it were no use to him. "But dear Alice still seems to be on such good terms with the mate that forsook her. How strange," Aro pondered, looking at Caius to see what he made of it._

"_You think she may still be friendly enough that she'd come to their aid if they were under threat?" Caius mused._

"_Yes. And we do have proof that they were involved with another newborn army. Perhaps we should pay them a visit and see about punishing her former mate and the newly turned Bella for their actions," Aro suggested. "That may draw her out if they're still so friendly. And surely afterwards she'll want to check on Carlisle. We can wait for her to come." _

"But it did. I don't want to see or hear from you or any of the Cullens again. This is goodbye," Alice said as harshly as she could while still blinking the remnants of the vision away. _Please let that be enough._

Jasper sucked in a sharp breath, but simply said, "I understand."

Maybe now Aro would finally believe she'd cut ties with the Cullens.

She searched, hoping the scene had changed enough. Once again the scene started in the same place.

"_A Cullen was in the area," Aro announced to his brothers, summarily dismissing Felix. Jane looked shocked at the news, and even more enraged to only just be hearing about it. A wrinkle creased Aro's brow as he contemplated what he'd seen. _

"_How are they involved?" Caius demanded._

"_Who?" Marcus inquired, though he looked bored rather than curious._

"_Jasper. But Alice has left him - and the Cullens," Aro absently answered. He looked troubled, uncertain. _

"_Have they finally turned the human?" Caius demanded._

"_Hmm? Bella? Yes," Aro said absently, waving the point aside as if it were no use to him. "Jane, you met Jasper in Forks last year. Do you find any evidence that he was involved with Santiago's demise?"_

"_No," Jane said, lips pursed into a pout. Then she added, "but don't you find it… odd… that he was there at all?" A devious little glint had flickered over her face as she spoke._

"_Yes," Aro agreed, latching onto the words like a miser being offered gold._

"_Perhaps the Cullens felt they could do a better job handling the situation, and sent him to clean it up. He has experience with that. I think it would serve us well to remind them that we are the ones in power. Not them," Caius said disdainfully, his fingers tapping roughly on the arm of his chair as he spoke._

"_A warning. To them and others," Aro agreed, seeming taken with the idea. "A golden opportunity." _

"_The Cullens will serve as a lesson to others," Caius said, smiling broadly and sitting back in his chair, the king of his domain._

"_All of them?" Marcus asked, obviously disapproving. "Alice and Edward might not understand when they hear." The words were a dangled carrot. One meant deliberately for Aro._

"_Carlisle then," Aro decided, latching onto it as Marcus must have known he would. "Though it saddens me greatly, a reminder must be given, and he is head of that coven. The responsibility of guiding his coven members' actions falls to him. If only he hadn't let it grow so large. He should have known he'd eventually lose control of them. We all saw it happen with the southern clans." _

_Aro moved further into the room, looking at the guards standing silent sentry against the wall. _

"_Felix, Demetri, Afton, Nadia, and Alec will go," he declared. Jane opened her mouth to protest being left behind, but Aro forestalled her, saying, "Not you, dear one. The others can handle it. He was once a friend, and I don't want him to suffer. You understand?"_

"_And if they resist?" Caius prodded._

"_Hmm, yes. Alec will ensure they can't resist, but let's send Gaius to emphasize our strength and the futility of ossosing us. __Chelsea should go as well to make the loss go down easier. Split them apart after. And Edward may still show up and decide to become a member of the guard once his coven disbans. She can help see it happen. And then Alice will be that much more likely to join as well," Aro concluded._

They'd already seen Jasper, there was no avoiding that now. Jasper couldn't just kill Felix because Jane and Santiago were there. He couldn't stay there any longer either or Jane would join Felix and hurt Jasper just for fun - she didn't need to see it to know it to be the truth.

Simply telling Jasper to go was the only option left. Alice could think of nothing else to alter the future more favorably.

At least if she just told Jasper to leave they'd have a little time to come up with a plan to save Carlisle from the Volturi's decree.

"I know Bella is in the city, but you should _call_ her and tell her that it's time to go back to Carlisle. Neither Edward nor I will ever return even with you gone," Alice advised.

"If you're sure," Jasper said.

"I am. I've met someone else and will be traveling the world with him as we meet new people. Call Bella. And go. _Immediately_," Alice commanded, disconnecting the call even as she spoke.

She dropped the phone, stepping away as if it burned her.

The second she looked up at Seth, he was crossing to her. Helpless to resist the offered comfort, Alice flung herself into his arms, needing to feel grounded as she sorted through the utter chaos of the last few minutes.

Had it really only been a few minutes? It seemed like lifetimes had passed. She could barely keep up with all she'd seen. There were so many possibilities. Too many people were involved. So many decisions influenced the chain of events about to unfold.

"I thought I knew what they were up to. I didn't - I didn't see it. I was wrong," Alice muttered into Seth's chest. His warm hand cupped the back of her head tenderly.

"Alice?" he questioned, pulling back to look down at her petite form. When she didn't speak he tried again, "Pixie, what's happening?"

"The Volturi. I thought they were just making sure we changed Bella, and hoping I'd join them someday. But that's not it," she explained, wishing she could cry or shake the images free from her mind.

"What are they up to?" Seth demanded, eyes scanning her face for clues.

"They were just waiting for an excuse to break us apart. They're sending guards to destroy Carlisle."

* * *

This is the end of Part 2: Awakening.


	19. 19: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

The last part of the story is here (remember, I said at the beginning each part has nine chapters - this is the first of those nine)! If that makes you sad, you can try to talk me into writing Mae's story so you see more of these characters, there wasn't much interest before when I mentioned it. I'll try to post one or two chapters a week for Part 3 of this.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. I don't think there is any, but if so, most has changed at least a little. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Part 3: Forever

Love is a symbol of eternity. It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end.

Germain de Stael

* * *

Chapter 19 - Bella

Bella came to an abrupt halt when a stranger materialized unexpectedly in front of her. The grey hem of his cloak flared out around him before settling in a perfect circle at his feet.

Slowly, he lowered his hood. Red eyes, deep, the color of black cherries, stared out at her from an olive-toned man that rivaled Emmett in size. Recognition registered in the blood-soaked eyes, but Bella didn't remember ever meeting him before now. Dark, glossy hair, and olive-toned skin spoke of a Spanish or Portugese origin.

She instinctively stepped back, her hands rising to shield Renesmee from view, to make her invisible to the hungry eyes, even as she bent into a defensive stance. Her lips pulled back of their own accord and a growl filled the air, ripping from her chest. It took a moment, and the feel of the reverberations for Bella to realize the primal sound had come from deep within her.

The actions only served to draw his notice to her daughter even more.

Fixated. He stared at Mae transfixed. It was the look everyone gave her upon first meeting her daughter. But Bella was one hundred percent against this man looking at Mae that way.

An image of Jacob and Jasper filled her head, accompanied with the desire to find them. Then the question of _where were they_?

Bella covered her daughter's hand on her face with her own. It was a desperate attempt to offer comfort and reassurance, despite being terrified herself.

Warning. Warning. Warning. Alarm bells flared in her head, deafeningly loud. The whirling, flashing lights of an ambulance.

"Momma?" Mae whispered, seeking answers when her mother didn't say anything to her silent communication. She wasn't used to being ignored.

The uncertainty in the small voice infuriated Bella. Nothing had the right to make her daughter sound like that.

The stranger's mouth dropped open at hearing the little girl speak.

Instantly, Bella's terror and anger were gone. Replaced with the fiercest need to protect her child. No matter what.

"Well, well," the stranger said, voice thickly accented. "I remember you from your visit. I am Santiago, and I see you've been busy during your short time in this new life. She's very nearly too young. I'm sure -"

He broke off when Mae whimpered, the sound catching his attention.

Her breathing had picked up, and Bella could hear her already quick heart beating even faster. The Volturi guard seemed to hear it too. He listened, head cocking as he continued to stare at Mae. His brow wrinkled in uncertainty and confusion.

The vibrations of another growl resounded through her chest, muffled, but warning the man to back off.

"What _is_ she?" he finally asked, seeming unable to help himself.

"Leave her alone," Bella hissed, muscles tensing in preparation to attack. Her chest rumbled with a suppressed snarl.

"Aro will be fascinated with her," Santiago announced casually, as if it were a foregone conclusion that Aro would be meeting Mae. "She'd make such an interesting addition for us."

All Bella heard was the inherent threat in the proclamation.

"No!" she denied at once, the sound ripped painfully from her throat.

"You think you can keep this secret?" Santiago asked, laughing in disbelief. The laughter abruptly died, and he straightened, eyeing Bella more critically. "Or were you threatening me?"

"Stay away from my daughter," Bella demanded, the words every bit a threat.

"As if you could stop me," he taunted, sneering disdainfully at her.

Another image flashed in her mind, Mae's hand pressed firmly against her cheek. Bella saw the three of them talking, Bella relaxed. Then Jacob and Jasper again, this time showing up to help defuse the situation. Mae didn't want this turning into a fight. She didn't understand that there was no denying the Volturi when they wanted something. And Bella was certain that Santiago was right. Aro would want Mae when he learned of her.

"Renesmee," Bella warned, silently pleading with her daughter to not interfere.

"Is that her name? _Renesmee_," Santiago asked gleefully, saying the name with relish. Bella hissed again, but he ignored her. "Why don't you come with me so I can take you to meet some people. They'll be very interested to get to know you," he offered, holding out a hand the way the snake offered the apple to Eve in Eden.

"No, thank you," Mae said, her voice tinkling like bells across the small clearing.

"How... polite," he started slowly. A coldness replaced his congenial mean though as he continued, "But it wasn't a request. Come with me or I'll kill your mother and take you anyways." The words came quick and cruelly as he tossed the threat out as easily as breathing.

The sounds of ripping cloth echoed around them, and pieces of a pair of cut off shorts fluttered down as Jacob's massive wolf form lunged forward, snapping his powerful jaws at Santiago. Jacob was terrifying, roaring as he flew past her. It was the first time Bella understood just how powerful Jacob had become. He was larger than any beast from legend and every ounce of his rage was directed at the one that had just threatened his imprint.

The vampire stumbled back, eyes widening comically with shock and his arms pinwheeling.

Jake's teeth caught the vampire's wrist, cutting clean through with an ear-splitting grinding cacophony so that Santiago's hand was dangling at an odd angle. He roared in outrage as Jacob spat the chunk of vampire flesh aside like it was a watermelon seed.

The guard barely hesitated, using his other meaty fist to slam into Jacob's side. The snap of breaking ribs knifed through the night air, and the wolf went flying, soaring into a tree before crumpling to the ground.

"_Jacob!_" Mae cried. The fear in her voice made Bella see red. A cloudy hazy descended before her.

Mae scrambled down Bella's back, attempting to dart forward and help the wolf she cared so deeply for. Bella caught her arm, pulling her quickly back.

Jake had already sprung up, lunging forward with renewed purpose to headbutt the vampire then used him as a springboard to push off of and out of reach.

"Renesmee, no, you can't. I'll help him, but you must stay back," Bella promised, waiting for Mae to nod in agreement. She did, though she never once looked away from Jake.

Bella instantly regretted her hasty promise. She'd never fought before. She'd make for such an easy target. Didn't know the first thing about fighting. Desperately, she wished to help, but she feared something going wrong, and then Mae would be left vulnerable. But she had to do something.

Jake continued darting around the vampire, nipping at his heels to keep him off balance. Each time he nipped Santiago, he tore a new piece off the vampire until they were scattered all around them like hail during a summer storm.

"Renemsee, find the lighter in your bag," Bella ordered.

Mae tugged the small bag from her back, ripping open the zipper in her haste to retrieve the lighter. They'd used it just the other day to toast marshmallows. They'd gotten the idea from learning people toasted marshmallows over the lava erupting from Pacaya, another volcano near Antigua that they hadn't visited. Mae had been disappointed over missing out on the opportunity, so they'd toasted the gooey sugar the traditional way that day instead. She'd hated them, but had fun trying anyway.

Bella darted forward to grab the arm Santiago had aiming a punch at Jake. The second his head turned to growl at her, Jake caught his knee, ripping the lower part of his leg off and tossing it to where Mae stood.

Bella fell back, needing to keep her body between the vampire and her daughter.

Mae handed over the lighter she'd found with a shaking hand when Bella reached her side. Immediately, Bella lit all of the nearby discarded bits on fire, including the portion of the leg. Lavender smoke bloomed upward the second the flames engulfed the stone-like misshapen lumps.

Santiago roared in outrage, turning to limp towards Bella and Mae.

The redirection was enough that Jake was able to clamp onto the back of Santiago's neck. Jake's teeth grated and ground as they moved through their enemy's body, delivering the final death blow with a final, echoing click. It was fast. Faster than he deserved after threatening Mae.

Her phone rang just as the Volturi guard's head fell forward, plummeting to the ground as his body fell sideways, limp and lifeless. Though if he weren't burned he'd be able to reassemble the detached parts. What remained of them at least.

That knowledge spurred her on. Bella didn't hesitate to light the parts on fire, ignoring her still ringing phone to take care of the vampire before he tried to reassemble himself.

Mae wrapped her slender arms around Jake's neck in thanks, hands patting him lightly where he'd taken the hardest hit. Jake sniffed and sidestepped, shifting deliberately away from the touch, though he nudged her with his head. Inspecting his side more closely, Bella could actually see the way his fur didn't lay right. It was more concave than convex. His ribs were flattened, possibly bowed inward in a five-by-three inch area. Adrenaline must have kept him from feeling it enough to slow him down any when he'd been fighting Santiago.

The sound of Bella's phone ringing again stopped her from going over to investigate the injury more closely. Mae had buried her head in Jake's neck, and he was still standing, so it likely wasn't life threatening.

Bella pulled out her phone, answering the call, and heard him before having a chance to say hello.

"Why didn't you answer?" Jasper demanded roughly. She was taken aback by his tone. It was guttural, raw.

"Jazz -"

"You're alive," he breathed. Bella could imagine the way his eyes would close as he spoke, his rigid stance easing. Then he demanded, "Is Mae all right?"

"Yes," Bella confirmed.

"I need to see you," he stated. It was a primal need she was feeling as well. As if she couldn't stop the chaotic emotions of battle until she was in her mate's arms and felt for herself that they had both survived.

Santiago was still burning. Pieces of him flung further away still littered the little area of the woods, waiting to be added to the blaze like firewood. They couldn't leave until that was done, but Jacob and Mae were too busy eavesdropping to do it. Not that she wanted her daughter having any hand in this at all.

"We were attacked -"

"The other guard. What happened?" Jasper interrupted. His awareness of this situation surprised her. Why hadn't he already come to her if he knew?

"Jacob fought him, and I burned him," Bella relayed, moving to grab the last bits of Santiago herself, throwing them at the blaze as she spoke.

"You did _what_?" Jasper whispered, incredulous. "So that's why," Jasper said, a lightbulb going on for him. Though Bella was still in the dark.

"Jasper," Bella said impatiently, throwing the final remaining piece of the Volturi guard onto the makeshift pyre. "Why what?"

"Bella… the Volutri won't stand for attacking one of their own. There's an implied threat in that. And they know I'm here. They'll feel they must retaliate," Jasper explained. He didn't sound chiding the way another might, explaining something that the other person should have been able to figure out for themself. Or angry that she'd reacted in a way that had unfavorable consequences. He just sounded terrified. For her. For them.

"He threatened to take Mae," Bella said, wanting him to understand why they'd done it.

Jasper's responding growl tore down the line. The sound of a warrior out for blood.

"She's all right," Bella reminded him. Though she doubted he'd calm until he could see it for himself.

"You did the right thing. But, Bella? Alice called. We have to go home now. Is Jacob there? I need to talk to him," he said quickly, between forced breaths.

Jacob didn't shift at first, and Bella realized he was waiting for Mae to move away. She guided her daughter away, pulling her into her arms, needing to hold her and reassure herself that Mae was safe. Mae buried her face in Bella's hair. Little puffs of her sweet-scented breath filled Bella's nose.

Once Mae's eyes were shielded, Jake phased and took the offered phone.

_Thank you. _ Bella heard Jasper say at once, sincerity overflowing the two words.

"Of course," Jake said, going for lighthearted and shrugging, but he winced, hand going to his battered side even as he knelt to look for the spare clothes he kept in Mae's bag. They each carried an extra set for him. Just in case. Though this was the first time this trip that they'd needed them.

Jacob was hurt, but there was nothing they could do about it right now. They needed Carlisle. Perhaps they should all learn a little bit of medical knowledge if the packs were going to continue being part of their lives. If something like this ever happened again, they should be able to help the wolves.

"Send them to the airport. I'm almost there myself. Then cover their scent. Felix is still in the area, and he can't find any trace of them. Understand?" Jasper ordered, ever the strategist.

"How bad is this?" Jake asked, glancing up to meet Bella's eyes, then shifting his gaze to Mae. With the phone cradled between his chin and shoulder, he tugged on the basketball shorts. His brow was wrinkled, and he seemed to realize this wouldn't end with the events of this evening.

"We'll talk at the airport. Hurry, but be thorough," Jasper replied.

"Sure, sure," Jake muttered, handing the phone and bag over then turning to get to work.

Bella left him, navigating easily through the area towards the airport on the edge of the city with Mae clutched tightly in her arms. The desire to be with Jasper carried her there.

The second she stepped through the doors his arms were around her, holding on for dear life. Their foreheads pressed together and his eyes fastened with hers. His were black with suppressed emotion. After a single breath, inhaling their scents, no doubt, his worry and relief spilled out, swirling around her like a tornado. Love and reassurance were there too, caught up in the storm.

Mae inched out from between them, but Jasper caught her, pressing her to his side. She went willingly, wrapping her arms tightly around him for a moment. Then she lifted her hand to his cheek. Probably to show him what happened.

Jasper's emotions vanished at once, locked down tight to shield Mae from sensing the true extent of his aggression and bloodlust. He wanted to destroy Santiago all over again. She recognized the same feelings in herself. Even without his gift, she knew him well enough to guess.

A dim memory surfaced in Bella's mind. One where she thought Jasper wasn't a very tactile person. How utterly wrong she'd been. Jasper craved touch. Sought it out constantly. From her. He loved feeling her love and happiness. Loved feeling accepted despite his scars.

A single hand began roaming over Bella, almost indecently for a public location. Searching. Jasper was searching her for himself to verify that she was unharmed.

Her hands came up between them, running up and down Jasper's chest and stomach. Almost petting him. Not to excite him, but to sooth. Offering reassurance that she was there and fine.

"You're hurt," Jasper said, pulling back to turn to Jacob. The wolf had just come in and stopped short at seeing them, unwilling to interrupt the private moment.

Jacob waved his hand, silently urging Jasper to drop it. He glanced pointedly at Mae, where she was still clinging to Jasper's side. He didn't want to worry her or shake her up more than she already had been tonight. Besides, they couldn't do anything about it here anyways. And Jacob probably didn't want to think about needing to have his bones reset for the second time any sooner than he had too.

"What's going to happen?" Bella asked, hoping Jasper had some more information.

"They'll retaliate. They know I was there," Jazz said, sighing. "We'll have to wait for Alice to tell us more than that."

Bella pulled out her phone, needing to hear from Alice what she'd seen. To learn what would happen - as well as she could, at least. He smiled, nodding and leading their group towards the security checkpoint. Bella waited until they were through to dial her sister's number.

The phone rang twice before, "Hello?" Seth answered, sounding shaken.

Bella had almost forgotten what it was like to watch Alice's visions. The way her face would go blank, her eyes occasionally glossing over. It was while she was seeing that Alice most resembled a statue - a lifeless object rather than an individual. Then there was the guesswork. To only get half the story, and just have to go along with Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

"Where is she?" Bella asked

"Trying to see. She needs time," he said, protectiveness coating the words.

"Seth, what if -"

"I know. Alice won't let you down, but give her a chance to figure out the best approach. She's doing everything she can," he said defensively. Bella's eyes widened in surprise, but Jasper chuckled at a private joke. Though it lacked the full extent of humor it usually possessed. Seth added, "I've never seen her like this. Tonight took a huge toll on her, and she's still trying to get more information even now. Give her a chance."

The heat of Jake's hand covered her own as he pulled the phone from her unprotesting grip. He stepped farther away, whispering into the phone. He trailed after them as they made their way to the correct gate, but he kept his distance to keep his conversation private. Bella tried her best to block out the words to respect that desire.

When they reached their gate, Mae wedged herself between Bella and Jasper in the waiting area chairs, and watched Jacob talking to Seth, a concerned expression making lips pucker and her face scrunch up. Bella stroked Mae's hair, and she and Jasper exchanged a silent conversation. They'd do whatever it took to protect their daughter and keep their entire family safe.

After a few minutes, Jasper pulled out his own phone and dialed, never looking away from Bella as he spoke.

"Em, we need you," Jasper said.

Even as Emmett replied, _Anything, bro_, through the speaker.

Bella heard the faint sound of Rosalie speaking from the background of the other end. Her question, a single name, _Mae?_

"We're fine, but there was an incident with the Volturi. We need to get home. Bring Garrett if he's willing," Jasper explained.

_We'll meet you at the airport tomorrow_, Emmett agreed immediately. Love for their brother came from Jasper and matched her own feelings.

"Jazz… " Bella whispered, trying to keep her voice even to keep from worrying Mae.

"We'll keep her safe. I swear," Jasper said fiercely. It was a declaration that she feared hoping for.

Jake waved at Jasper, calling him over to talk to Alice and Seth. But he waited until Bella nodded before he got up.

He bent to kiss her. Just a quick tasting, but the strength and passion behind it made her head spin. It was a promise. As binding as a signed and notarized legal document.

Jasper always kept his word.

He never let her down.

And she believed him in this too.


	20. 20:Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

This starts where Alice's last chapter left off and goes forward from there. Alice is really going through it in this chapter, poor thing.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 20 - Alice

21 days until the Volturi showdown

"Thank you," Alice said, leaning against Seth. The visions had taken their toll on her.

Her fingers moved involuntarily, a brief spasm of pain from where she'd bitten herself. No one had ever told her that even her own venom would hurt. It seemed like a gross oversight just then as it continued to burn unpleasantly.

Seth reached up, attempting to touch the fresh mark, but Alice stopped him, jerking her hand away.

"Don't risk it. I don't know how long the venom remains lethal to you," she explained, not wanting him to think it had been his touch that she was avoiding.

She was venomous. It was lethal to his kind. The reminder that it wasn't just the potential complications involved with imprinting that stood between them was another weight on her shoulders. Add it to the rest. The hits just kept on coming right then. Her back bowed under the strain.

Seth nodded, dropping his hand away. "You need to see again?" he asked instead of mentioning the fact that she was quite literally toxic to him.

"Yes," Alice sighed, not ready to delve back in, but knowing she needed to try. He stepped back, retreating twenty feet to lean casually against a tree and wait. It was nice that he understood and reacted without needing direction.

How long would they have before Felix and Jane discovered Santiago's burning remains? Whose decisions did she need to be monitoring? If she tried to watch too much, she would miss something, and now wasn't the time to let that happen.

There was Jane. She was the most unpredictable. So maybe she shouldn't watch her. It was too easy for Jane's capricious, childish mind to change. Besides, she seemed to understand Alice's gift a little too well. Thank you, Aro, for sharing those precious facts after her visit to Italy this time last year.

Being so vulnerable did not sit well with her. It made her cranky and sarcastic. Disgruntled. Not bubbly and perky.

Felix then. He was the one that would share what he'd heard with Aro, after all.

Alice searched. Delving into her mind was never easy when she had to deliberately steer her gift. It much preferred when she just let it happen naturally. Right now it resembled a sailboat navigating the ocean without a rudder. The current tried to force her one way, while she aimed another. All the while waves crashed against her, rocking and tilting her until she nearly capsized.

_Esme was carrying the small toddler bed from the cottage. There was the frame of a twin bed waiting outside. A few other boxes were scattered around as well as a vanity table. The changes seemed to reflect Mae's advanced growth and new interests._

Nope. Felix. She had to focus on Felix. What would - wait…

_There were three vampires on the ground. Jane's eyes were dancing between them in a sick and twisted version of eanie, meanie, minie, moe. The one unlucky enough to have her gaze land on withered, mouth stretched in a cry of agony as he flopped on the ground - a landed fish. The poor vampire wasn't forced to endure long, no more than a few seconds, before it was another's turn and Jane focused on the next victim. However, the reprieve didn't last and her glaze inevitably landed back on the first vampire again._

"_Jane, stop playing with them already," Felix demanded, though it should have been a request since he didn't actually have the power to make her do anything she didn't want to do. "Let's be done with this."_

The scene faded. Alice blinked away the grimy feeling that came with seeing another in pain and not being able to prevent it. She needed a shower. Or a way to bleach her brain.

Nothing had been decided yet. She had a few minutes to brief Seth where he waited patiently for news. She hadn't been entirely clear in her explanation to him earlier.

"What's the verdict?" he asked when he noted her focus was back on him.

"The Volturi were dealing with a problem and saw Jasper. I don't know what else happened, but it's enough for Aro to use to stage an attack against us," Alice said.

For the first time she realized the Amazon coven wasn't with them. When had they vanished? She was sure they were there when the first vision hit. Had she really been so lost to it that she'd missed the changes in her surroundings? She was about to ask Seth, but he spoke before she could. "They want to hurt Carlisle? You said that before, but I didn't… he's just so… _good_. I can't believe anyone would want to hurt him."

"That's the problem. Everyone loves Carlisle. It wouldn't be very hard for him to make a play for power in our world. Many would follow him without question - many powerful vampires," Alice said knowingly. "Many others would stand against him simply because he shuns drinking human blood, and they'd be afraid he'd try to force them to stop - not that he would ever take away another's choice - but no matter what, it'd result in an uprising. A revolution of sorts."

"Carlisle doesn't want to rule," Seth said confidently. He understood her father well.

"No, he doesn't," she agreed ruefully. "But the Volturi have trouble believing that someone wouldn't desire power. Particularly when surrounded by powerful people."

"Like you," Seth pointed out, making Alice sigh.

"Yes. Aro wants me. He thinks killing Carlisle will help him get me because I'll have no one to go back to," Alice said sadly.

"You're not a toy to be passed around," Seth said, anger on her behalf making his voice sharp. He stood up straight from his slouched position against the tree. His fists balled and he clenched his jaw, making a muscle tick in irritation.

"He doesn't see it that way. He wants what I can do for him," she said, shrugging helplessly. It was a fate she intended to avoid.

"He really thinks you'd be able to forgive him for killing your father?" Seth asked incredulously, beginning to pace in front of her.

Alice heard Zafrina, Senna, and Kachiri returning. The difference between them and the Cullens was so pronounced. She realized Seth only really knew her family. He likely just thought the Amazons were unusual because they lived a solitary life with just each other for company, and preferred to isolate themselves. In truth, their enduring friendship made them more humane than many of the vampires Alice had met in her life.

"Most of our kind only form strong ties with their mates," Alice explained, educating Seth about her world. "We don't form attachments and friendships. Not the way humans do. We can go centuries without seeing a 'friend' and not miss the person at all."

"You're not like that," Seth denied, stopping to face her. Disbelief colored his expression. His certainty in her family's goodness, despite the natural instinct to be enemies, made her smile even with the stress of the conversation. "None of you are."

"Our diet makes it easier to retain that part of our humanity," Alice said.

"If that's your story," Seth said. "I still think you're just good people."

"She's right. We three care only for each other. There is no room or desire for others in our life," Zafrina said, stepping from the cover of the surrounding trees.

"Harsh, but -"

"We've become friends." There was a question underlying Zafrina's statement.

"Yeah," Seth agreed, grinning almost as though he was humoring her. Then his smile widened more when he looked at Senna. Alice almost chuckled herself at his impishness. He was still bound and determined to make the recalcitrant vampire like him.

"We could move on from your untimely death -"

"Thanks," Seth said dryly, though his smile never waivered.

"We could not if it was one of us," she continued, pretending he hadn't spoken. "To lose one would be a death sentence for us all."

Seth didn't speak for a minute, contemplating what she'd told him. Alice appreciated the gravity he gave the declaration. He was really making an effort to understand her world better. Proving he wanted to be a part of it with her, even if life with the Cullens was more familiar and what he was actually trying to sign up for. "I think I understand."

Alice was about to compare it to imprinting for him, but her vision darkened. The group before her faded, replaced with a new scene happening soon somewhere else.

_Jane was torturing the final vampire. He was younger than the other two had been, a bit of round softness remained in his cheeks, though his time spent with the female before him seemed to age him a decade in the last few minutes thanks to her nonexistent mercies. _

_Jane was apparently in no hurry to finish. Her smile had grown since before matching the ratcheted intensity of her torture on the boy._

"_Santiago should be back by now. We should search for him," Felix said, bored watching the spectacle._

"_If the fool is lost, then that is on him," Jane said dismissively, waving Felix away so she could focus on her prey._

"_Jane," Felix warned._

"_Fine," Jane sighed, finally easing up. With a casual flick, she lit a match, dropping it on the cowering boy laying at her feet. "But Aro will hear of how I had to stop delivering his justice in order to find his idiotic pet. I hope he's hunting."_

"_So you can tattle on him?" Felix inquired, a sneer twisting his lips._

"_We're here for a job. Not our own personal enjoyment," Jane said loftily, stepping around the pile of ash and cinders, heading in the direction Santiago must have gone earlier._

"_Really? I'd have never guessed," Felix said, shaking his head at the irony of her words, but following her anyways._

"_There's nothing wrong with being good at your job. Aro trusts me," Jane said, smirking._

If they spoke more, Alice couldn't make it out as they ran through the woods. But she could tell they were following a scent.

_Abruptly, the pair came to a halt. Evidence of Santiago covered the ground. Ashes and cinders. There was nothing else. It didn't even look as though a fight had occurred in the area._

"_How did this happen?" Felix said, dismayed._

_Jane looked furious. Her eyes frantically scanned the area, searching for clues. Or a new victim to unleash her fury upon. Felix closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. His nose wrinkled in distaste._

'Thank you, Jacob,' Alice silently thought. After a while it was possible to become accustomed to the unique odor of the wolves. But the Volturi would not have had time to adjust. Lucky for Bella and Jasper, it was enough to mask their presence as well. Because Bella surely smelled of Jasper, and Felix knew he'd been in the area.

_Surprise flickered over Felix's face, but all he did was say, "It must have been the newborns."_

"_You think a newborn can take down a member of the guard?" Jane asked, doubtful._

"_If there were enough of them, and they caught him by surprise," Felix speculated._

"_Aro must be informed. Right away," Jane announced, but Felix frowned._

"_You don't think he'll be more furious that we didn't stay to find those responsible? How would it look if word of this got out? Everyone would believe they had the right to challenge us and get away with it."_

"_As if anyone could challenge me. But I see your point," Jane conceded._

The scene vanished, like changing the channel on a television program. Suddenly Alice was seeing Seth talking on the phone instead. She could hear Jacob speaking on the other end.

"Tell Jacob he did a good job covering their trail," Alice said, praising the wolf, and relieved he'd been successful. That was one problem solved at least.

"What else did you see?" Seth asked, watching her expectantly. He didn't bother relaying her message, knowing his alpha had already heard.

"They're going to search the area for whoever killed Santiago before reporting to Aro. We have a couple weeks." Part of her wanted to go to Seth, but she needed distance if she intended to see any new developments that happened.

_Do you know how long? When they'll attack_, Jake asked through the phone.

"I'll check," Alice said, closing her eyes to help her mind focus on the exact moment she needed to see.

_The Cullens were facing off with Alec, Afton, Nadia, Gaius, Felix, Demitri, and Chelsea in the clearing where they'd fought the newborns. Alice wasn't there. Only Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, and Bella. And of them, only Bella was moving, head turning back and forth to take in her frozen family. The others stood still as statues thanks to Alec's ability to paralyze his opponents._

No sign of her or Mae.

No indication of a date.

Alice searched again, considering other decisions, other triggers, that might provide more information. What about when they left the house to head to the clearing?

_The family was filing out of the house. As they passed the dining room table, a flyer lay lonely and forgotten, printed on blue paper. It was the kind that got tucked under a person's windshield wipers while they were inside a store. The advertisement was for half price margaritas at the diner. Declaring, 'Today Only for Cinco de Mayo'. _

"May. The fifth. Three weeks from now in the clearing," Alice said.

Why was she not there? Could she join them?

"_You remember her mind. Is Alice truly not with them?" Aro asked Demetri, the two alone somewhere in Volterra._

_The tall, dark vampire closed his eyes. His head cocked, as if smelling a roast turkey cooking down a different hallway. His nose tried to follow the scent._

"_No. I don't sense her there. She's south. Much farther south," Demetri replied._

"_If that changes before you engage the Cullens, leave them and retrieve her for me instead," Aro said, anticipation making his shoulders go up as he shook like an excited puppy being offered a treat._

"_Yes, master," Demetri acquiesced._

She couldn't be there. She was leaving her family alone when they needed her. It was the only way to circumvent Aro, but the knowledge was destroying her. It choked her. Made it impossible to draw in any air. Unnecessary as it was. She wanted the familiarity it offered.

Seth stepped up to her, wrapping an arm around her tiny shoulders and pulling her against him. The comfort of heat and sandalwood surrounded her. Just like that she could breathe again. Alice hadn't even realized she'd been shaking until she felt Seth's hands running up and down her back soothingly.

"Do you want to talk to Jasper or Bella?" he asked, the phone still cradled in his neck.

"Jasper," she admitted guiltily.

Here she was in Seth's arms, but seeking her ex-husband. Seth, however, seemed unfazed by her choice and handed off the phone easily. He started to pull back to give her some privacy, but she clutched his shirt in her iron fist, not yet ready to have him release her. Instantly, he stopped, wrapping his arms tightly back around her.

"Alice," Jasper greeted a minute later.

"Jazz, I'm so sorry," Alice whispered, regret for not seeing this sooner making it difficult to speak.

"Don't you dare apologize," he firmly demanded.

"But -"

"You did nothing wrong, sweetheart," he said, using his endearment for her. It made her eyes burn with the need to cry tears that could never form. "It's not up to you to protect us every moment of the day. Don't take that on yourself."

It was exactly what she'd needed to hear.

"This could be really bad," Alice warned.

"You've already kept the situation from turning worse," he countered.

"Thanks," Alice said, grateful.

"You're not coming home. Are you?"

"I have to keep it from turning worse. And we still need answers about Mae," Alice said.

"Thank you," he said. Alice could picture him standing in the airport, looking at Mae as though she were the first ray of light he'd seen after a lifetime of darkness. For someone like Jasper, who knew only pain for so long, Renesmee was an extraordinary gift. One he would cherish and do anything to protect. "You'll keep us posted with anything else you see?"

_A woman in a blouse and navy skirt with a small scarf knotted at her neck stepped up to a kiosk. She raised a microphone to her lips and said, "Now boarding flight 1541, nonstop to Atlanta."_

"Of course," Alice agreed readily, then added, "Don't miss your flight." Even as she spoke, she heard the announcement begin in the background on Jasper's end.

He hung up without another word, just a soft chuckle.

* * *

19 Days left - time was a blessing and a curse

It took two more days of traveling to reach the area the Amazon coven remembered meeting the unusual boy in so long ago. Once there, it was decided to set up a sort of makeshift base camp. That way Alice could spend the day searching the future while Seth went with Zafrina, Senna, and Kachiri to search the area. Alice needed the separation and lack of distractions to fully immerse herself in her gift.

Everyone in the family had called to check-in on her at least once. They were all back together and it made her sad to be away from them. Knowing they were all together while she was a world away was left a tacky, bittersweet film in her mouth, impossible to swallow away. At least she had Seth still. He was the piece of home that she got to keep with her. His optimism was a nuclear reactor powering her through everything.

Surprisingly, Garrett had opted to follow Emmett and Rosalie back to Forks. He'd even agreed to try hunting their way so the packs wouldn't get upset. He'd said the challenge would be exciting. Plus there was the draw of getting to finally meet Renesmee after spending a few months attempting to locate others like her.

Alice was still recovering from the conversation she'd had with Carlisle the day before. She'd tried to apologize to him as well, but he'd simply said, "As long as my family is safe, it is a sacrifice I don't mind making."

It made her more determined than ever to find a way around the future she saw. The Cullens would not lose their father the way the Denalis lost their mother. It was just too unjust.

Her head was a fucking crustal ball these days, ask it a question and see an answer.

What if Carlisle traveled to Volterra first?

"_Thank you for saving us the trip, old friend," Aro said, extending his hand. "Shall we see what mischief you've been up to?"_

_Carlisle hesitantly placed his hand in the ancient's. _

"_Even more secrets! Even more plots!" Aro cried, nodding to guards. Three stepped forward, two grabbed Carlisle's arms, one on each side, the third collared his neck. On some unspoken cue, they all pulled at once, breaking Carlisle into four separate pieces._

_Caius flicked his hand, using a lighter built into his robes that shot flames outward in an arching streak. His aim was true and Carlisle was instantly aflame. _

No! Alice could not lose her father like that. What had Aro seen that he feared so much. The answer came to her at once. The wolves. Their alliance. However Aro learned of them, it must be done in such a way that Aro knew they were only a threat if the Cullens were attacked first. She'd have to think more on that later.

The secrets could also be applied to Mae, though she was hardly dangerous. Aro would want her. Another problem to think on.

Unfortunately, given their natures, she couldn't just _see_ the answer. These were riddles she'd have to solve herself.

What if Alice returned home even just to say goodbye?

_She was at the Houston airport, waiting. Blackness._

So that was a no.

What if they tried attacking before the Volturi arrived in the meadow to face them? They had Garrett now. Would that even the odds?

_They were running forward, Emmett in the lead. Then they froze. FElix caught up to Emmett a half step later and tore his arm clean off._

_Blackness._

Alice knew she was missing something, but seeing her brother lose an arm made analyzing the scene closer an impossibility.

Down, down, down she went. Into the rabbit hole. Alice was visiting Wonderland on a daily basis. More like she kept getting sucked in and trapped. The Mad Hatter's riddles stumped her. And she could not leave without providing the correct answer - no tea for her. No escape.

Nothing worked! Her head better resembled a doomsday crystal ball. Negative outcomes only. Step up if you'd like to know how you die! Love? Nope, not something she could predict. Health, happiness? Nopes, not that either. Despair? Sure! No problem.

The only real conclusion she'd drawn, was that they could win in a direct fight. But would it be worth it? Because if it came down to a fight, there would be loses. People she cared about could die. And that didn't feel like winning to Alice.

After the third day of searching after arriving in southern Chile, trying different ways to diffuse the situation before the fighting even started, she finally admitted that she'd been decidedly unsuccessful. It was galling. Never had she been so thoroughly thorted.

In every possible future, it was the same. Talking failed - every time. It always broke down and dissolved into a fight. A fight that she couldn't see once it started in earnest.

At first Alice assumed it was because there were too many people, and therefore too many decisions that wouldn't be made until the moment before they were executed. As a result, there was nothing for her to see in advance. It made sense. No matter how frustrating it was.

That night, she mentioned the problem to Seth.

"There are too many holes and blank spots. I'll start to see, then it just vanishes," Alice ranted, fingers raking through her short hair in frustration. She tugged at it a bit when she noticed Seth smiling. Her eyes narrowed. "What? What's so amusing about my limitations?"

"It's the packs. Your limitations are being triggered by the wolves," Seth said knowingly. Of course! _How had she not considered them?_

The wolves had fought with the Cullens against the newborns. Her gift had behaved the same way then. But she'd been trying to monitor fewer people's decisions then. And things had still slipped through. Hadn't Edward berated her for it at the time?

It was the same now. Only worse. There were close to a dozen people she was trying to watch, on top of the few she'd already been watching. Some to ensure they survived, like Carlisle. Some to help make sure they had a future, like Mae. Some to see what they'd do or how they'd retaliate, like Aro. So many choices. All resulting in different futures. And only she could see all of the possibilities. Was it any wonder that she was losing her grip on reality? That something as obvious as the wolves fighting with them being the reason her gift sputtered out ended up going right over her head?

Alice feared she couldn't take much more of this. Already Seth spent more time with her during the night than he did away, deliberately blocking her sight when he knew she'd already seen too much during her hours alone all day.

Sometimes he'd look at her, and she'd just know she was speaking gibberish. Nonsense words about a possibility that hadn't actually taken place, but she'd seen it in enough alternative versions of the future, she'd assume it really had occurred. Whenever this happened, she'd trail off uncertainly, and Seth would just hug her, not commenting or calling her on it.

Vampire minds were capable of so much more than human brains. Endless room for processing information. Yet hers was full to bursting. Too many visions happening to process. Countless possibilities. Countless decisions. She was trying to watch them all. But everytime she saw something new, it triggered countless more decisions that could be made in response.

A house of cards, one more and it'd fall.

It was too much.

Was this how a schizophrenic felt all the time? Because if so, her heart went out to any that suffered in such a way. It was such a heavy burden to bear.

Seth's face morphed, concern for her taking over, and she realized she'd been silent too long. That too was happening more and more. If only she could solve at least one problem her family was facing… To carry just a little less…

What had they even been talking about?

Oh, yes. The wolves. The packs were going to fight. That's what was happening, right?

"They're going to fight with us," she stated needlessly, getting back on track.

Seth, to his credit, pretended that nothing was amiss. He stowed his own worry because he knew she just couldn't take being responsible for anything else just now. And because he knew she wanted to talk. So he plastered a smile on his face. One that was almost convincing. She'd have been fooled if they hadn't spent these last few months together.

She pretended to believe it anyways - the same way he pretended not to be worried about her.

"We can't let their kind in our territory. And with how connected we all are now," Seth said, shrugging like it was no big deal or bound to happen.

"But Alec," Alice said, the name coming out a breathy exhalation of fear.

"We have to try," Seth said, determination adding steel to the statement.

If the packs were destroyed…

Alice couldn't let that happen. They'd endured for centuries. So many counted on them. Their people. Their loved ones. Their imprints. If she couldn't see a way to save them… their annihilation would be on her every bit as much as it was on the Volturi. It was her fault for not seeing this threat in time in the first place.

Another burden. Another weight on her shoulders. And they'd never been very big to start with.

Then her attention snagged on the word _we_ that Seth had used. He wanted to return for the fight. He hadn't brought it up, he'd made a commitment to her and he would honor that first, but he wanted to go.

She could lose him. She could lose Seth before they ever had a chance to discover what they could be.

* * *

15 days… and counting...

The next morning, minutes after Seth and the others left, Alice did the one thing that no amount of foresight could help her determine whether or not was the right thing. She called her brother.

"It's time for you to go home, Edward," Alice said.

The pain had started before Seth was even out of sight. Her surroundings came in and out of focus as flickering, flashes of scenes demanded to play out before her unseeing eyes. In the last week, her gift had morphed into a debilitating beast. A monster of her own making. The effort to see too much was slowly driving her insane. Without Seth, there was no more Alice. No reality without him. Only possible futures. Futures she didn't seem to get to be a part of.

Had she already thought of this? Or had she only seen herself thinking of it? Was this happening now, or would it?

What was she doing?

Oh - Edward! She'd called him. He was on the other end of the phone she held.

She'd made the decision to call Edward before the last of her lucidity fled. At least she thought that was what happened. Actually, she wasn't even sure if she was really talking to him, or if she was seeing what would happen if she did call him. This conversation had already played out in her mind a number of times without changing.

Were her thoughts starting to repeat? She couldn't be sure. How long until Seth returned?

"What's happened? Is Renesmee -" he began, worried.

"Aro is sending the Volturi for Carlisle," Alice confessed.

"Are you sure?" he asked, though the resignation in his tone suggested he already knew the answer. She wouldn't be calling if she'd already found a work around.

"Yes. They saw Jasper in Guatemala. Aro is using this as an excuse to destroy Carlisle and split up our family," Alice explained.

"Just a moment," Edward murmured. She could hear him repeating her words. Probably telling the rest of the Denalis.

_Tanya looked around at the assembled group. Both of her sisters, Eleazer and Carmen all looked to her for a decision. Edward was standing near the door, holding a phone. _

"_Of course we will all go to help. Carlisle is family," Tanya announced. Irina opened her mouth to protest, but Tanya shook her head. "We must make amends. We owe them for not going before."_

"Thank you," Alice said before Edward had a chance to tell her. "Good luck," she added, knowing how much Edward was dreading his reunion with Bella and facing Mae for the first time. And for once, Alice could offer no assurances that everything would work out fine.

This changed things. They'd have help now. How would the Volturi respond to the new additions?

_Alec stepped from the trees and paused, bringing the other guards up short behind him. It was a fleeting pause, but the gathered assembly perceived it. It wasn't often that the Volturi were caught off guard. _

_But they were right then. They'd expected to find six vampires. And here there were, more than double that number._

"_So many wish to witness an execution?" Demetri suggested, glancing at Felix, his usual partner in these endeavors._

"_Perhaps they think to take us on," Alec said, his smirk mirroring the one Jane favored._

"_Then they've all come to die," Felix replied, though he looked disappointed, as though he expected better from the Cullens or would even regret their loss._

_The amassed Cullens and Denalis stopped moving as the guards approached. Alec's gift was already taking hold. The unwelcome visitors fanned out, coming to a stop before the golden-eyed vampires._

_Bella sprung forward the second they stopped. Shock splashed across each of the guard's faces, temporarily freezing them as if Alec's gift was being used on them as well. _

_Bella was running directly at Alec. One, two, three steps. Blackness._

Bella. Of course! How had she missed it? It'd been there all along, but she kept overlooking it. Bella was a shield. Her mind was blocked from Alec. Just like her thoughts were from Edward and Aro. If she could stop the boy witch twin...

Alice gasped as she was sucked into a new scene.

"_Dear one, I am so sorry. The Cullens destroyed dear Alec," Aro said._

_Fury shook Jane's entire frame. Slowly her lips twisted, baring gleaming teeth clenched in rage. Without a word, Jane turned and strode purposely from the room._

Jane wouldn't stand for anyone harming her twin. She'd retaliate against them if they did. Alice searched, wondering if she could find what Jane would do if told they'd killed her brother.

It was cloudy, the decision not yet fixed. It was likely the kind of thing that Jane had fantasized about doing, and this was just her excuse to see it done.

_A couple, formerly asleep in their beds, lay dead, split blood staining the striped sheets. A young child, blonde as her parents, also dead, laid at Jane's feet while she fed from another. The body was turned, masking any distinguishing features, but the size indicated the girl was even younger than her sister. _

_It'd been a bloodbath. The entire family destroyed in minutes. Jane dropped the lifeless remains, kicking it out of her way as she moved towards the door. Pausing, she glanced back at her handiwork._

"_Shame. Good thing there's more," she said, then continued on her way, walking outside then through the front door of the house beside the one she'd come from._

_She entered a room decorated in posters of kung fu movies and anime, moving directly to the bed. _

Alice recognized him from her time at Forks High School. It was Ben, Angela Webber's boyfriend. Likely just home for the summer after his freshman year of college. Oh no. Jane was going to hurt people in Forks in retaliation.

_The vampire shook Ben awake. He blinked groggily as she spoke, "The pain you're about to endure? It's the Cullens' fault - kill them all." Then she bit him. _

_It was instantly apparent that she'd lost control. Bloodlust overpowering her desire for revenge. He scrambled against her, hands unable to find purchase, and he was too weak to push her away. In seconds she'd drained the young man, killing him. _

_Jane sighed, tossing the corpse back onto the bed before heading into the master bedroom. The occupants sat bolt upright when the door slammed open, startled awake._

"_Remember this when you wake - kill the Cullens. This is their fault," she hissed, darting forward to bite first Ben's father then mother. She didn't stop moving until she'd bitten both and was standing out front on the lawn again. _

_A satisfied smile curled her lips as she moved to the next house on the street._

_Again and again, house to house, everyone, even children suffered her bite. And to each she delivered the same message - kill the Cullens._

_Two hundred at least suffered her bite. _

Alice was trapped, watching as person after person she'd met in Forks fell prey to Jane's particular brand of vengeance. It wouldn't stop. Every bite and occasional death played out as if Jane was just waiting to do something this drastic.

_Eventually, Jane stopped, though she was only halfway through the town._

"_Perhaps I should save the rest for the others coming. They should be awake by now," she pondered. "Or not. So many decisions. Which will confound her more?"_

Jane had lost her ever-loving mind. She completely flouted the laws she'd spent centuries upholding. This wouldn't just risk exposure. That many casualties would be impossible to cover up. Yet Jane didn't care.

And the damage the children she'd turn would do? Alice didn't even want to contemplate the massacres that would take place.

This was precisely why children were forbidden from being turned. They were too unpredictable. Too irrational. Too ruled by emotion. And Jane was very nearly young enough to be classified as an immortal child. She'd only been twelve when turned. And apparently her sanity would not remain intact if she lost her twin.

She'd only barely been sane to begin with.

Alice was reeling over everything she'd just witnessed. Even knowing it hadn't happened and was avoidable, she was pained by the very idea of it happening. So many innocents. So many people she'd come to know.

It took a few seconds to realize Seth was snoring about twenty feet away. It was the middle of the night. The vision had started early that morning and only now was she released from it's vicious grip. Never had she had a vision go on so long or be so engrossing that the outside world ceased to exist for an entire day.

It scared her.

She was tempted to wake Seth so he could help erase the grisly images that had accompanied her vision, but she knew he needed the rest. He'd been staying up more and more to give her a reprieve when the pain would get to be too much.

She could call Bella instead. She'd be up, and she needed to tell her about her gift and warn her that Alec couldn't be killed outright. They'd have to put him out of commission without doing any permanent damage to the boy wonder.

"You're gifted," Alice announced happily the second the receiver clicked, not even giving Bella a chance to say hello first.

"Alice? Wait, I am?" Bella asked, part amused, part doubtful. The sound of her sister's voice chased the haunting, grisly images of her vision away. She could put it in the back of her mind - at least temporarily.

"Yes, Bella. You have a gift. You really were meant for this life."

"But I haven't done anything -"

"You've been using it since we met you," Alice interrupted, loving keeping Bella in suspense for just a little longer.

"Alice, you're not making any sense," Bella huffed. Alice imagined she'd just crossed her arms and could picture the way her eyes would narrow with displeasure at being kept out of the loop longer than necessary.

"You're a shield," Alice revealed. Her words caused Seth to roll over, blinking awake. He scanned the place she'd been sitting when he arrived, and visibly relaxed when he found her standing and alert.

Alice walked over to sit by Seth. He nudged her with his shoulder, and when she glanced at him, he mouthed, 'hi'.

"Shield? Like what superheroes carry around?" Alice laughed at the idea of Bella carrying a shield into battle. This was more like a tinfoil hat. That image produced another round of giggles. Seth nudged her again, and she laid her head on his shoulder once her laughter had died down.

"Sort of. But yours is around your mind," Alice explained.

"How does that help?" Bella said, obviously disappointed it wasn't something more glamorous or exciting.

"It blocks other vampire gifts from harming or influencing your mind," Alice informed her, trying to help Bella see how useful this was.

"Okay?"

"This is a good thing, Bella," Alice chided.

"How?" Bella huffed, clearly disappointed.

"Alec can't stop you. So you can stop him," Alice said, urging Bella to understand just how important this could be for them.

"What about everyone else?" Bella asked quietly. "Can I use it to help them?"

So that was the real problem. Bella wanted to be the hero for once and save everyone else. She'd need to learn that they could take care of themselves and she just needed to worry about doing what she could to help.

"That's called projecting, and it takes time to learn," Alice informed her.

"How do I learn?"

"When I say time, I mean centuries, decades at the very least - you don't have that kind of time, Bella," Alice warned, shutting Bella down as she thought of Kate spending almost a thousand years just learning to spread her current over her body, let alone away from her.

"So I'm useless," Bella sighed, sadly.

"Bella, the others will be able to fight if Alec can't use his gift against them," Alice said, sighing exasperatedly herself. "Just don't kill him. Or let anyone else kill him," Alice added, shuttering at the memory of her day long vision of Jane's massacre.

"Why not? Alice, he's threatening our family," Bella demanded, a touch of the remaining newborn mood swings showing through.

"Jane. She won't take kindly to losing her twin. We can't let others suffer for us," Alice relayed.

"All right. I'll tell - who?"

The sounds of a knock on the door, and Esme enthusiastically greeting someone sounded in the background.

"Sorry," Alice said quickly, realizing who had just arrived at the Cullen house.

"Alice! You couldn't have given me a little warning that Edward was coming?" Bella hissed, barely audible.

"He's there to help?" Alice tried cautiously, wondering if it would be enough to soothe Bella. Her answering hiss said everything. "Talk soon, bye!"

"So Bella's pretty upset Edward's there, huh?" Seth said, unsurprised. At her questioning look, he said, "Leah told me earlier that they were on their way."

"That's putting it mildly," Alice quipped. "But they need him - all of the Denalis. And she's really just mad at me for the lack of warning."

"Speaking of home… Where do you want me more?" Seth asked quietly.

"Seth?" Alice questioned, needing to know that he was asking what she thought he was.

"Do you want me to stay here? Or do you want me to go help protect our families?"

"It's not up to me," Alice denied, shaking her head against the idea of controlling him in such a way. What she wanted would go against his nature and beliefs. She couldn't ever do that to him.

The idea that he could die, just as she was realizing that she could want a future with him was a kick in the gut. He'd been right all along. All the reasons she'd had for hesitating seemed insignificant now. The way he'd demonstrated his devotion these last months, the way she'd come to rely on him, it meant so much more.

"Because I'm not your mate?" Seth asked sadly, referencing what he heard for the first time. There was nothing accusatory in the question, just resignation.

"Because Sam decided for you last time. It wasn't fair of him, and I won't disrespect your choice like that," Alice clarified, needing him to see the difference.

His head shot up and he looked closer at her, hope returning. He wasn't giving up on her. And she didn't want him to.

"We'll talk about us when you get home then?"

"Count of it," Alice agreed immediately, shocking the wolf as well as herself. He'd done it. He'd worn her down.

His mouth parted in surprise as his eyes scanned her face. He must have seen something unexpected because he reached up and ran a finger over her cheek, swallowing loudly as he did. She shivered involuntarily at the contact.

"I'll stay as long as I can," he vowed. "And I'll be waiting for you to come home."

* * *

10 days, little more than a week… well, a week and a half, but who can keep track these days

"Yeah, mom, I'll be home next week. I'm surprised Leah didn't tell you," Seth said. He'd get home May 2nd. That meant five more days before he needed to leave.

Alice was taking advantage of their time together. They'd found a beautiful lake with miniature icebergs floating in it and a glacier in the distance. They were sitting on the stone beach as the sun went down. It was five hours earlier in La Push and Sue had just gotten off work as a hospice nurse, primarily on the reservation, though she'd travel as far as Sequim regularly, so Alice was unabashedly eavesdropping on their conversation as she skipped rocks.

_She's avoiding the reservation. It was all I could do to get her to come to dinner at Charlie's the other night_, Sue said, all disgruntled fondness for her daughter clear in her voice.

"How's she handling that?" Seth asked, amused at the idea of Leah staying at the house and potentially running into Charlie in his boxers out for a midnight snack. Seth knew from experience how disconcerting it could be. He'd told Alice about being tongue tied around the man for days afterwards.

_Better than I expected. I wanted to wait until you came home to tell you, but… He asked me to marry him,_ Sue admitted slowly, as if testing the waters. Seth grinned at Alice when he heard his mom's news.

"When's the wedding?" he asked her, hoping that was all that needed said to indicate his support.

_You're all right with it then? _Sue verified.

"Thrilled. He makes you happy," Seth said, grin stretching impossibly wider.

_Thank you_, Sue said, sounding a little choked up.

"Are you moving off the reservation then? Or have you thought about how to juggle the packs… " Seth asked awkwardly. He couldn't imagine keeping a secret like that from a significant other. Neither could Alice.

A long, heavy sigh sounded from the speaker. _He's been asking questions,_ Sue admitted.

"Like what?"

_Like why Leah came back and you didn't. Or why Mrs. Cullen seems to have adopted Embry and Quil these last few months. Then there was the fight between Jacob and Paul at Billy's yesterday, _Sue relayed.

Seth shared a frown with Alice. They'd known Embry and Quil had taken it upon themselves to keep Esme company while all of her children were out scouring the globe, but Jake hadn't mentioned anything about a fight when they'd talked earlier. That had been right after their unexpected discovery about the pack mind. Of course, Jake was worrying about other things today. Alice could kill Sam herself after what Seth told her he'd said. "Why were they fighting?"

_Rachel's pregnant. Paul isn't happy with her being in danger and having to fight for the Cullens again, _Sue explained. Alice was shocked. A baby. That was huge. Jake was going to be an uncle. It was proof that life goes on, even in the midst of war.

Seth zeroed in on the rest of what she'd said though. "How much did he hear, mom?"

_Enough that Charlie's decided to go see Carlisle after work today and demand some answers. Leah went over to warn them, but I figured I'd give you a heads up too. And I wanted to be the one to share my news so you didn't hear about it through them first,_ Sue said.

Alice sucked in a breath. The last thing they needed was Charlie learning everything just before the Volturi visited them. But if Bella could somehow have a relationship with him, and he could get to know Mae… It was something that'd be worth considering. An opportunity the others had been denied after becoming immortal.

Then came the realization that she hadn't seen anything about Charlie hearing too much. Or that he was going to propose. Or that he was going to visit Carlisle. And he was one of the people whose decisions she'd been monitoring. If all of that slipped through, what else had?

She was a walking circus act. The juggler. A poor one though. One that let the objects fall, couldn't keep them afloat once their number multiplied beyond a certain point.

"Thanks. I'll be home soon," Seth said, at a loss for words.

"I didn't see," Alice said, dropping her head into her hands. Tired. She was so tired. If only she could rest. Alice would sleep for a solid month if it were possible.

"You're trying to do too much," Seth chided, covering her hands with his and pulling them from her face so he could properly assess her. She didn't let go of his hands, and he seemed perfectly content with that.

"Yes. And now things are slipping through the cracks," Alice muttered. "I just wish at least one thing would work out right now. Just one less worry."

She really couldn't handle dealing with any new problems when they hadn't solved any of the last ones yet.

"Come here," he ordered, laying back and nestling her against his chest, arms wrapped securely around her back.

It probably felt like having a stone on his chest the way the Puritans killed Giles during the Salem witch trials, but his smile didn't betray a hint of discomfort. Maybe being a wolf meant he was strong enough for her unusual physique. Alice certainly appreciated his warmth. As well as welcomed the temporary peace, listening to the steady beat of his heart all night long.

* * *

8 days… possibly? Probably? Alice really couldn't keep track anymore...

Two days later Alice was in the same position as before, hunched in a tiny ball by the remnants of the fire from the night before, scanning the future for any new decisions that would impact her family.

More of the same. Each time she looked, the same scenes played out. It was getting old. Her crystal ball head had devolved into a magic eight ball, ask it a question and you'd get a limited number of standard responses. How… quaint.

She was about to call Jasper to see how Bella's training was progressing when Seth appeared, breathless from running, and gleaming with a sheen of sweat.

"Alice," he gasped, scooping her up in his arms and spinning in an exuberant circle. The most excited he'd been the entire trip. "He's alive."


	21. 21:Jasper

Author's Note - sorry, I know this one is long...

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

This chapter actually ends before the end of chapter 20. Bella's chapter is next and it will cover the remaining parts and move forward from there.

I know some of you might be angry or disappointed with the direction taken during Edward and Bella's reunion. I ask that you keep in mind the fact that she's had months to process it at this point, her blissful happiness with Jasper, and the fact that right now, her only concern is protecting her family. She doesn't have time for distracting arguments that won't help them save Carlisle.

Also, I was trying to stay true to the Bella from the books. No matter what anyone does to her, she forgives them and internalizes the blame. I've tried to make her character grow enough that she has finally stopped blaming herself for everything, but she still forgives everyone for everything. That's just who she is.

Edward's actions were enough to finally break his hold over her, but Mae's existence has permanently tied them together. Now they have to find a way to interact and get along for her sake. You'll see a bit more of that in the next chapter from Bella's point of view.

For those of you still disappointed, that was one of the reasons you got to see the visions Alice had of potential futures where Bella did ream him out - at least a little. They were possibilities, however unlikely, but still seen at least in part through the pixie fortune teller.

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there may be a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 21 - Jasper

20 Days

It was almost noon when they landed, and it was a relief to be back up north. The return of perpetually overcast days made it unnecessary to worry about exposing themselves to humans. Staying cooped up all day, and only going out at night had reminded him a bit too much of his time in the south with Maria.

Cloudy Washington with Bella and the Cullens was infinitely preferable.

Mae ran directly to Rosalie, planting her hand on her auntie's cheek and making Rose glow with joy. It was a powerful hit, addictive, magnetic, and Jasper drifted closer unconsciously. The tension and worry from the last day was replaced with elation expanding like a balloon to fill his entire being.

Emmett laughed at him, but he too was eager to hug Mae and spin her around until she couldn't stop giggling, to give him a hard time.

They headed to the cars fairly quickly after that, preferring to enjoy the rest of their reunion in the privacy of their home where they didn't have to pretend to be human.

Bella hadn't wanted to separate from Mae, protective urges were riding her hard after the way Santiago threatened to take their child, but Mae wanted to spend time with Rose and Em, and there wasn't room for all eight of them to ride together. Jasper would follow wherever Bella needed him most, but Jasper needed to talk to Carlisle, preferably without little ears around. He figured she'd appreciate taking part in the conversation.

Jasper caught Jake's eye and the wolf nodded, moving to help Mae into Rose's BMW, despite his injury. Carlisle would have to take a look as soon as they got home. Feeling's of acceptance surrounded him, wordlessly indicating that Bella was fine with this alternative.

Jacob was Bella's best friend, and she'd always trusted him to watch out for her. Well, mostly trusted him. She worried he was a bit too arrogant about his ability to take on vampires single-handedly and come out of the fight unscathed. But now she'd also grown to trust Jake to look out for Mae's safety since he'd proved himself capable numerous times while they'd been gone - particularly during his fight with Santiago.

"Alice said we have three weeks. They're searching the area, and it will take them a while to figure out there's nothing to find. It gives us time," Jasper said into the silence of the car. He felt Carlisle's resignation and silently cursed.

"I won't have any of us doing something that could endanger the rest of you," he said softly, truly having resigned to his awaiting fate.

"The hell we won't," Jasper said, the statement as hard as diamond and as tough as titanium.

"Jasper," Esme chided, though half-heartedly. Mostly she was intrigued, secretly hoping he had a trick up his sleeve, and a plan to save her husband and mate.

"We can't lose you, Carlisle. You're the backbone of this family," Jasper said, willing his father to stand against this injustice. To not just roll over and accept death.

He also felt Bella's desire to echo his sentiments, but she sat quietly instead. Sometimes he disliked how hard it was for her, still trying to figure out her place in their family. When she'd been human, Edward had unconsciously drilled it into her head that she wasn't one of them, and therefore didn't have a voice worth hearing when it came to matters that affected them all. A couple times she'd insisted on being heard, like voting to turn her, but his reaction had made her reluctant to speak up again - not worth the fight.

Even Alice had steamrolled over her choices a few too many times. He and Emmett were also guilty of being a bit too surprised to discover she actually had a decent brain when they'd first met her - before they'd gotten to know her. But those interactions left indelible impressions.

He'd have to talk to her about it later. It was something he'd have to work on. She had a right to voice her opinions and sentiments. Things were different now, without the dynamics of her and Edward's relationship being imposed on the family. Now everyone would respect her mind.

Hopefully they'd have the time to see the change.

It'd only happen if Carlisle survived though. Because without him, Esme would be a shell. She'd force herself to live for her children's sake, but Jasper doubted Rosalie would be able to handle sticking around to see her like that. And Emmett went where Rose did. Edward and Alice were already gone. Knowing them as well as he did, they'd both try to take the responsibility onto themselves for failing their father and would refuse to come back. That left him and Bella. And Mae. Whose future was still a complete mystery. It could still turn out that the three of them didn't have a future to fight for.

"Thank you… son," Carlisle said thickly, and Jasper felt his appreciation and love. "But I can't bear the thought of one of my children dying because they thought to save me."

"We'll figure something out. We have time," he said, dropping the subject for now.

They spent the rest of the car ride discussing the changes in Mae's development since she wasn't around.

"I'd agree. She's approximately twelve or thirteen," Carlisle said, contemplating what he'd seen of her in the airport. Mae's features had finally caught up to her height. But aside from that, her aging was relatively normal now.

"There haven't been any detectable changes overnight - not the way they happened before," Bella informed their father.

"That's good. So long as she doesn't have any more rapid growth spurts, she could live another seventy, or even eighty years with medical advancements and if her heart holds out," Carlisle said optimistically.

Bella's distress physically pained Jasper. She couldn't bear the thought of living forever without her child. He understood. No parent should outlive their child.

"We aren't racing a clock anymore to find answers," Esme added, trying to cheer Bella up. "There's no reason we can't keep looking once this is over if Alice doesn't find answers first."

"Carlisle… have you considered what would happen if you tried changing her?" Jasper asked, needing to give both Bella and himself the chance to keep her. He'd been afraid to ask before, scared that the answer would be a resounding no. It was an idea he'd sat on long enough.

There were many indicators that Mae was like the wolves, which would mean vampire venom was lethal to her system. But considering she was part vampire herself, how could it possibly be incompatible?

"I'll have to run some tests," he hedged. Jasper felt his doubt. He didn't think it would work. Probably for the same reason Jasper had just thought of. But the evasive answer gave Bella hope, so he didn't call his father on it. He also didn't bring up the fact that he'd have to survive the Volturi in order to run those tests.

For a while once they were home, Mae regaled everyone with tales of Guatemala. The people she met, the things she saw, all of it. She delighted in using her gift to show them, downloading images directly into their minds. It was better than sharing pictures.

Garrett's reaction to Mae had been the highlight of his day though. He was utterly enchanted, completely taken in by her charms - just like the rest of them.

Mae had walked right up to him, brave and fearless, and asked, "Are you here to help my family?" in her clear, chiming voice full of innocence and wonder. The sound of it held all the appeal of vampire charisma and the innocence of children - an undeniable combination.

Garrett kneeled before her, a subject to her will. It was startling to picture the patriotic vampire who believed so completely in self-rule willing to serve his daughter. The idea flickered in and out of focus, overlaying the real scene playing out. Jasper was abruptly grateful the Volturi had no knowledge of her, for they would certainly view her as a threat with her ease at making people love her and do anything for her. It was the same power the immortal children once had - even if it wasn't actually the case here.

If she didn't outgrow it, she'd no doubt follow in her mother's footsteps and break a lot of hearts. The memory of the male population at Forks High School falling all over themselves for her came to mind.

"Would you like that, young one?" Garrett asked softly, taking her hand and covering it with his.

"Yes, please," she said simply.

"Then I will. I always support my friends. And I would like to see justice carried out," he concluded, proving that his position was more a show of respect, and that he could relate to her on her level than it had been about being willing to serve.

"Because you know we didn't do anything wrong?" Mae asked, intrigued that a stranger would so willingly help them. She'd picked up on the danger of the situation, and understood what Garrett was risking - even if not fully.

"Precisely," he replied, grinning broadly.

"Would you like to hear about my adventure?" Mae asked, changing the subject now that she'd determined he was a friend. His eyes lit up at the word adventure, and Jasper decided to discreetly remind the newcomer that Mae was less than a year old and didn't need to hear details of what he no doubt considered adventures a little later.

"Very much," he agreed.

The rest of the day and evening was spent playing games and being a family. Jacob had left as soon as they got to the house, eager to check on his father and the remains of his pack. Carlisle had gone with him, letting Jasper know the hasty departure was really so Mae wouldn't hear Jacob scream out in pain when Carlisle tended to his wound. They were lucky the damage hadn't been worse - just a few cracked ribs that didn't set right.

It was great being together again, Esme hadn't left his side in hours, except to make a snack for Embry when he checked in for a visit, and Jazz loved the motherly attention. Mae had nodded off with her head pillowed in Rosalie's lap, the blonde stroking Mae's hair and humming softly. But Alice's absence was a gaping hole that everyone was tiptoeing around lest they fall in and plummet into inevitable territory of loss and death.

"It's been almost a week, darlin'," Jasper said quickly, so low in Bella's ear that he knew their family couldn't hear. The second he made the reference he felt the responding spike of lust from his mate.

Bella stood, clutching his hand as she did, and dragging him up. He went willingly. Hell, he'd follow her anywhere. Particularly if her emotions were a promise of what was to come.

Without a word, Bella started for the door. Jasper trailed in her wake, a sailor following his siren's call. On the way, he met Emmett's smirk. Jasper shrugged, as if he were a helpless puppet at her mercy. Em's smirk grew, recognizing the situation for the reality it was, and Jasper couldn't hide his answering smile any longer.

They'd been able to sneak in some alone time every now and then these last couple months thanks to Jake - he truly was glad they'd thought to bring him along - but it hadn't been often enough for his liking. He needed Bella.

They barely made it inside the front door before he tore her shirt off. At least this one she actually got some wear out of before he ruined it. He and Bella had basically worn the same outfit the entire time they were gone, and just washed Jake and Mae's clothes at the hotel every couple of days. It was nice that vampires didn't sweat or develop unpleasant body odor. It circumvented the necessity of showers. Though those were still pleasant to enjoy with a partner.

The idea spurred him on. Jazz walked backwards, guiding them down the narrow hallway even as their limbs remained entangled, and he continued tasting her mouth with honeyed lips in a drugging kiss.

Bella was intoxicating. Her flora bouquet of freesia, orange blossoms, and lilacs filled his nose, heavenly and delicious. His head was light from the sweetness of her skin, a sugar high. The rush powering him with the nuclear fusion of a thousand suns.

Gently, he trailed kisses down her neck, sliding his tongue over the smooth surface where the echo of her pulse once beat. Her back arched, bringing her breasts against his chest and sparking the desire to appreciate the area more thoroughly.

Hands ran up her sides, lightly ghosting over her ribs and making her squirm against him before he reached his destination. All the while, her fingers scraped purposely down his back to grip his butt. He tweaked the hardened peaks of her nipples before gently massaging the heavy globes.

"Jazz, I've missed this," Bella said, halting their progress by pinning him to the hallway wall so hard the hanging picture rattled in its frame. He let her. Kissing her hungrily again in answer and releasing every emotion he felt into the room for her to experience.

"Ahh," Bella moaned as he continued worshipping her breasts, occasionally pinching and tugging on the budded nipples. Distracted as he was making her, Bella managed to rid him of his pants. She ripped the zipper open then slipped her hand inside to grip his firm length.

"Mmm," Jasper groaned as he shook and bucked helplessly against her palm at the contact.

The destroyed jeans were discarded, along with Bella's, and he wasn't exactly sure when, but somehow they were both naked. He finished leading her into the bathroom, her hand never stopping its stroking and tugging, then turned on the water and pulled Bella into the shower with him. He positioned her so she stood under the falling droplets.

The water made her polished skin even more slick and slippery, and she appeared haloed in rainbows with the way the water and light reflected off her body. Since becoming a vampire, she'd developed an unflinching confidence. He felt it now as she stood naked before him. There was no fear, shyness, discomfort, or uncertainty. She wanted him to look at her. And he was more than happy to oblige.

Bella was mesmerizing. Glorious. He was in awe of her. What had he ever done to deserve her?

But that was just it, he didn't deserve her. No one did. And he was all right with that because she wanted him. Loved him. So he'd happily give her what she wanted.

"Mmhh, yes," Bella murmured when Jazz sank to his knees before her, kissing first her right, then left hip bone.

Easily, he pulled her knee over his shoulder to give him access to her core. Balance not an issue with their enhanced senses. Slowly, he ran his nose along the inside of her thigh, making her shutter and gasp, need blooming within her.

Jasper's hand inched towards her center, slipping first one, then a second finger inside her passage, working them slowly within her, in and out, until she was aching with need. He waited until the anticipation was almost pain, then teased the bud at the apex of her thighs with his tongue. Flicking it lightly at first, then more rapidly, using his vampire speed to make his tongue nearly vibrate against her.

Bella shivered at the way the water slid over her body, dancing sensually while Jasper poured himself into pleasuring her, licking, stroking, and tonguing her opening. Not needing to breathe definitely had its perks.

Slowly, with fingers and tongue, he drove Bella to the highest pinnacle she could reach. He looked up in time to watch as her head fell back, and water cascaded down her chest.

Bella's pleasure was his. He felt it all, experienced it with her. The rush, the ecstasy. Shutters racked his frame the same as hers, and he knew she experienced an even greater release because he'd allowed her to feel his as well - amplifying the total amount of pleasure possible.

When he stood, he slipped easily into her, sighing in peace at the feel of her encassing him with her arms, legs, and body.

"I'll love you forever," Jasper vowed, losing himself in her sunset golden eyes, the red hue so faint that only a vampire would be able to detect it now.

"I'll love you more," Bella said, a tad competitively.

He raised a single brow in silent question, wondering if she'd yet recalled his unique ability to know for certain.

"Shut up and love me," Bella huffed, though he felt her amusement.

"It'd be my pleasure, darlin'," he said, the concession a promise they'd both enjoy.

And they did. For hours. Slowly, lazily, sensually. Until they couldn't avoid their other commitments a moment longer.

* * *

19 Days

"There was something I was hoping you'd agree to do today," Jasper said as they traversed the path back to the house.

In the months they'd been gone, the forest had attempted to reclaim its land. Saplings had sprouted in the spring weather, and the underbrush was decidedly less trampled. New nests had been erected in the tree branches, unaware that they were in a predator's territory.

"I actually already had something in mind - but I'll need your help," Bella said, nervously wringing her hands. It was a leftover habit from when she'd been human, and he found it endearing to watch now.

Curiosity plagued him enough that he didn't wait for her to elaborate, instead asking, "Oh? And what's that, darlin'?"

"I want you to train me to fight," Bella confessed. He knew she'd been torn up about not being able to do more when Santiago attacked. Bella wasn't one to let others fight her battles while she stood aside, safe and protected.

"You read my mind," Jasper informed her, already outlining a training regime.

That had been exactly what he planned to do. He didn't much care for the idea of her being defenseless and reliant on others. A sitting duck. An easy target. He hoped to always be there to take on any threats, but the situation in Guatemala highlighted the fact that they would not always be in a position where he could help her.

"Really? You'll let me -"

"Let you? Bella, I'm not your keeper," Jasper said gently. It caused him physical pain whenever she said things like that.

"Sorry. So how are we going to do this?" she asked, quickly moving on. Time, he reminded himself. It would just take time for the old habit to fade.

"Do you remember when we trained the wolves?"

"Sort of?" Bella said, nodding, but it sounded more like a question and her scrunched face meant she was trying to access memories that were likely too hazy to bring into focus.

"Like that. I'll guide you through it so you don't need to worry. It's surprisingly easy for our kind to learn new skills, even fighting. Once you have a few basics, then it's just about practicing so you can learn to read different opponents. I'm sure Emmett will be willing to help," Jasper explained.

"Wonderful," Bella muttered sarcastically.

Jasper had trained many soldiers how to fight in his life. They usually fell into one of a few set categories. Those that needed to see something to learn it. This was most common for vampires thanks to their enhanced senses and ability to break down and analyze what they'd seen in moments. The next category was for those that needed things explained. This was most common for vampires clinging to their human existence since they relied less on their new abilities. They were also the ones that typically died in their first newborn battle. Then there were those that learned by trying and getting feedback. These vampires were the ones that improved the most and advanced the farthest. Bella fell into this category, but with a catch that wasn't all that uncommon.

Bella was stubborn. She would want to be perfect from the start. So much had come naturally in this life that she would expect this to be the same. She'd be annoyed at getting critiqued and not hear him. She wouldn't want to have to have help. Rose had been the same. Impatience would ride her thanks to the looming threat, making it that much harder for her to focus. It would take Bella getting tired of being frustrated and failing before she'd listen. They hadn't even started yet, and he could see the whole thing unfolding in his mind. Maybe his time with Alice had rubbed off on him.

He started with how she stood and moved, demonstrating a few easy ways to face off with someone or initiate combat.

"Don't plant yourself in the ground like that. If you were burly like Emmett that might be your approach, but you're light and quick. You'll want to be fluid. You're not human anymore, so your body will react every bit as fast as your thoughts. There's no delay - go with it, use it," Jasper advised, moving around her and helping her position her stance to one more suited for her.

"I know," Bella said, and he felt the first hint of annoyance. Internally he smiled, amused at how spot on his prediction was.

Still, she mastered it quickly - or at least got to the point it was comfortable and natural - and they moved on to reading an opponent to know when the person was going to strike.

"You want to watch their body language. Read it as though it were a book. Most of the time the person unintentionally telegraphs their moves," Jasper explained, deliberately shifting his feet and shoulders.

"Angela was the one that sat through kung fu movies with her boyfriend. Not me. I have no idea what that means," Bella said irritably, making her audience of Em and Garrett laugh.

"Of course. Did you see the way I moved when I said that? It's a sign that the person is about to launch a punch or kick. You can judge that, then move out of the way to avoid the attack," Jasper explained patiently. "Try to get your opponent to show you their tells without actually engaging. It'll make it easier to avoid when the fighting gets more intense."

"And if I don't want to avoid it?" Bella asked.

"You do. Most of the guards have been training for several centuries. They exist only to punish others of our kind on the ancients' orders. They live for the fight, and they are the best at it. We don't have time for you to master the skills necessary to take them on in a one-on-one fight. The most we can do is put you in a position to survive an attack or help if you do have to fight them directly," Jasper stated candidly. Bella looked ready to mutiny. "I'm sorry, but they have time on their side."

Her disgruntled expression remained, but Jasper felt the reluctant acceptance of his words. She didn't like the facts he presented, but she couldn't argue them either.

The rest of the morning was spent learning how to watch an opponent and avoid letting them make contact. The first time Jasper's fist made contact with Bella's cheek, he thought he'd be sick. His stomach churned and cramped painfully.

But then she'd straightened and he felt her dumbfounded surprise. "It didn't hurt," she announced, shocked.

"No," Jasper agreed, preparing to explain and apologize, but Bella laughed and he relaxed.

"It was just annoying, and disruptive, threw me off for a second," she said, critically evaluating how being punched as a vampire felt. He wondered if she remembered that just throwing a punch as a human had resulted in a sprained wrist for her.

"Only getting bit hurts - the venom. The rest is just… uncomfortable," he said, judging if she was up for continuing.

"Then what are you waiting for?" Bella asked, grinning and eager to train more now that she was feeling invincible.

"Think you're up for sparing with Emmett?" he asked, wanting to get to the part where he could really start teaching her.

Emmett was up and pushing between her and Jasper before she'd even agreed. "I'm not going easy on you, little sis," Em warning, bouncing like a toddler after eating cake.

"Tell me why I'm facing Emmett and not you again?" Bella asked, glancing around her enthusiastic brother to see him.

"We have three weeks. They're sending enforcers - muscle - Emmett's style is the most like them. I'll spend the last few days showing you a few special moves, but you need to work on this more first," Jasper explained, talking over Emmett's protest of, "Hey!"

Emmett had Bella pinned in less than two minutes. She may still technically be stronger, thanks to her remaining newborn strength, but Emmett already knew how to fit. Bella smacked the ground with a fist, leaving a divot that they'd have to hide later or Esme would be cross with them, then Bella was flipping back to her feet in a move he'd taught her earlier.

"Again," Jasper said.

Less than a minute this time. Bella growled, rolling over and rising up to face Emmett in a hunting crouch - not the fighting stance they'd covered earlier. Emmett glanced at him, and Jasper felt the question in the air.

"Again," he declared, nodding.

Just over one minute this time.

"Again," he said, feeling Em's confusion, but since he was still having fun, he kicked out at Bella. His foot landed solidly in her chest, knocking her flat on her back. The long tendrils of her hair flying out around her like Medusa's snakes.

Just over three seconds.

"Again," Jasper called before Bella had a chance to recover. Emmett shrugged and lunged to stop her from rising.

Not even two seconds.

"If you say again one more time -" Bella hissed, glaring furiously up at him as she scrambled ungracefully to rise out of the hole Emmett had made with her body on the ground. Grass and mud rose to form a miniature slope. Esme would be furious.

But Bella was almost ready to hear him. He could sense it.

"Again, Bella," he said, deliberately crossing his arms to project a sense of disinterest.

Emmett didn't move, just looked back and forth between them, assessing. Bella ignored her reluctant attacker, choosing to glare at Jasper instead. Her breaths came in short, strangled bursts. It was the first time she'd actually bared any resemblance to the typical wild newborn. But, even now as she bared her teeth at him, she was still far more rational.

"I won't have you defenseless, and you were the one that asked to learn," Jasper reminded her quietly.

Jasper sensed the wheels turning in her head, and felt it when she finally accepted that her way wasn't working. A calm settled over her. Oh, the quickly changing moods of a newborn - they altered more frequently and faster than the weather in Rapid City.

"Again?" Bella finally asked.

Finally. She'd finally worked through the frustration, the annoyance that this wasn't something she could do perfectly on her first attempt. Worked through her reluctance to accept help. Now she would hear his advice about where she was going wrong and try something different the next time.

"Yes, but don't let him get you pinned or in a hold. Use your speed to stay free of his arms," Jasper advised. Bella nodded, assessing Emmett and returning to the stance he'd taught her earlier.

"Again," he said, prodding Emmett.

Six minutes. It was an improvement.

"Don't forget to watch his feet," Garrett said. It was exactly what Jasper had been about to say.

"Would you like to help?" Jasper offered, interested to see how Garrett fought, and appreciating that Bella would have another to learn from. Garrett was eyeing the scars on Jasper's neck. He'd reacted the same as everyone always did yesterday, but he'd calmed at seeing how trustingly Mae clung to her papa.

"Sure, but I also wouldn't mind going a round or two with you later," Garrett said, striding arrogantly into the makeshift ring they'd created in Esme's backyard. All of the grass was thoroughly destroyed, ripped up and laying in messy, dirty clumps scattered about.

"If you're sure," Jasper agreed, feeling his lips part in a feral grin.

* * *

14 Days

The room cleared out faster than he'd have thought possible when the Denalis arrived. By some unspoken agreement, everyone seemed determined to give Edward and Bella privacy for this impromptu reunion. Garrett was already out hunting when they arrived. Carlisle and Esme had ushered the Denalis upstairs to a couple rooms they could make use of during their stay. Rosalie and Emmett had all but dragged Mae from the house, respecting Bella enough to let her decide when Edward would have the opportunity to meet his daughter. Jasper had turned to join them, wanting to make sure Mae was all right, but at Bella's warning look and explosion of emotions, he'd stayed put.

_Sorry, brother, _Jasper thought, directing the words to Edward in his mind. The long-lost Cullen winced, but Jasper only felt resignation coming from him.

Jasper felt the barrier Bella was internally erecting, bracing herself in case this turned into a battle of wills the way it usually had in the past.

For several long minutes no one spoke. Bella was a brick wall, impenetrable. Edward, on the other hand, eyed Bella critically. Jasper realized this was his first time seeing Bella in person now that she was one of them. He remembered being taken aback by the changes himself.

Sadness billowed out from Edward, intriguing Jasper. Sadness for what? The future he'd lost, the differences in the woman before him - he hadn't gotten to say goodbye to the old her, and it was almost as if she'd died and been reborn into a very different version of Bella.

Edward's head cocked, and Jasper felt his… agreement... possibly. So he was listening to him.

"I was wrong before," Edward acknowledged.

"Should I take that as a blanket statement considering the number of things it could be applied to?" Bella demanded, incredulously, though her body remained a frozen statue. Her body language not betraying any inner turmoil she must be feeling.

Edward nodded, looking her over from head to toe again.

Jasper began picking apart Edward's emotions, not just the surface ones, but the deeper secret feelings, hidden like layers of an onion, desperately needing to know how his brother felt about Bella at this point in time.

Most predominantly, there was fascination. Bella was the first woman Edward had ever been fascinated by. Her mind was a mystery, and that intrigued him after a lifetime of knowing too much. For once he could guess like the rest of them. And not be disappointed or disgusted if he didn't like the internal workings never meant to see the light of day.

Edward gave a barely perceptible nod. Apparently, he was all right with Jasper riffling through his emotions without so much as a by-your-leave. Ordinarily, he wouldn't deliberately violate someone's privacy this blatantly, but Jasper needed to know. Needed to know if he'd taken his brother's one chance at happiness.

Not that Bella was a trophy to steal. But Jasper hoped he wouldn't have to live with the knowledge that he'd hurt his brother irrevocably.

Edward nodded again, just the slightest tip up and down with his chin.

"I never wanted this life for you - I know you know that," he added before she could get riled up. "But I was wrong. You were clearly meant to become one of us."

"I know," Bella said, unmistakably defensive, but also with an air of confidence. It was the same confidence that Jasper never failed to find undeniably sexy.

"You're so different," Edward murmured, letting his sadness leak into his voice like a punctured hose spilling water.

"I grew up, Edward," Bella acknowledged, making an attempt to sound more civil.

Edward opened his mouth to reply, but checked himself. It was then that Jasper knew for certain Edward had no intention of trying to win Bella back. He'd truly forfeited his claim. He would respect the course things had taken, difficult as it was to do.

"Did Alice send you?" she finally asked when another few minutes went by without words.

"I want to help… However I can," Edward said, nodding. "And I'd like the chance to make amends. To get to know her."

A touch of frustration was all Jasper sensed now. Probably because he couldn't read her mind. He'd always preferred using other's thoughts to guide his dealings with people. It made for smoother interactions, and Edward disliked strife and conflict.

Again, Edward discretely nodded. He even felt his brother's reluctant amusement at the assessment.

"What role are you asking to play in her life?" Bella asked.

It was what Jasper wanted to know as well. He wouldn't let Edward come and go as he pleased. Mae wouldn't understand and he wouldn't let her get hurt like that. Hopefully Bella was on the same page. They'd only spoken of Edward's involvement in generals before. Never the day-to-day of actually raising her together. Seemed like a bit of an oversight now.

Edward shifted his head back and forth. No. No what? No, he wasn't planning on sticking around? Or no he wouldn't hurt her?

Edward shook his head again.

And Bella noticed.

"What? What are you refusing?" she demanded, crossing her arms in annoyance. "It wasn't a yes or no question."

Edward floundered. Guess he'd forgotten she no longer had a slow human mind that couldn't process his silent conversations with others. The ones he'd always deliberately kept her out of. Oh, how things had changed.

Annoyance now. Edward was as annoyed as Bella. Because he was being called on his actions and didn't much care to acknowledge the wrong he'd done.

Edward refocused on Bella, "Hmm? Oh, nothing."

"He's reading my mind," Jasper supplied, not willing to hide things from Bella the way his brother always liked to. "I'm sure you can guess everything I've thought, but we can discuss it more later if you'd like."

Bella smiled, satisfied with that promise while Edward's emotional state shifted to something dark and murky. A dirty, stagnant pool of rainwater and engine grease, polluted. All directed inwardly.

"I'd like to try to be a father to her," Edward finally replied.

"I think she'd like that as well," Bella agreed. "But how much or how little will be up to her."

"You and Jasper don't mind?"

Shock and gratitude. Those took no skill to decipher.

"No. We're all family. Jasper is her dad, but so are you. We'll be in each other's lives forever. We should start figuring out how we fit together," Bella said, lips tilting up in an only slightly forced smile. Edward looked lost, as though this boone was unexpected.

He was assessing her again, this time really seeing her. Possibly seeing her fully for the first time ever.

Nostalgia. For what? The little human things that had been so challenging to be around. Was that it? Edward missed that Bella made him work for it. Being with her was a never ending source of stimulation. Resisting her blood when she blushed, her intoxicating scent, her fragility. The way her clumsiness and danger-magnet self constantly needed saving.

He felt Edward's contemplation, but he did not refute the assessment.

Edward didn't love Bella. Not the forever kind of love. Puppy love. He loved the feelings she inspired - not her. He loved that she'd made him feel alive for the first time since he'd been human. And each time he'd lost her, he'd feared the return to nothing that had been his existence for nearly a century and that had been mistaken for heartbreak. He'd never known heartbreak, so he had nothing to compare it to. But that fear was why he'd fought so hard to keep her alive after returning from Italy. He'd had a glimpse of that nothing again, and would have done anything to avoid more of it. This was the very thing Bella used to fear.

Edward's head whipped around to stare at Jasper. Denial. Then horror, with the dawning realization that Jasper might be correct.

Edward had honestly cared about her - more than he ever had anyone else. Certainly. So much so that it was easy for everyone to believe he loved her and wanted her as his mate. But it was fascination and gratitude, not true, epic love that Edward had felt. And he didn't even feel that anymore, not to the extent he used to.

The way he'd been so eager for death when he thought he lost her, really might have been his irrational youth shining through. And he probably would have destroyed himself if the pregnancy killed her, but he'd had time to analyze the situation since then and reason had returned before he acted impulsively.

"Jazz?" Bella inquired, wanting in on their silent communication.

He felt Edward's pleading to protect his secret enlightening from Bella. The truth would hurt her and possibly dredge up her old feelings of worthlessness. He didn't want that for her either.

"I think we'll be able to make this work. The three of us," Jasper said. "We're on the same page about what we want from here on out, and Edward can move on like we have."

The door opened, and Em poked his head in. He caught Jasper's eye and nodded outside.

"Bella?" Jasper asked, not wanting to leave if she still needed him there.

"Go. Edward and I have a few things to talk about still," Bella said.

* * *

When Jasper stepped outside, it was to find Mae trying to peak in the window as she waited. Emmett clapped him on the back, offering reassurance then went to the garage, presumably where Rosalie was waiting for him.

Mae lifted her arms, a silent plea for him to pick her up. She hadn't done it since before Christmas. Most of the time her maturity rivaled her appearance, but occasionally there were flashes of her behaving closer to her actual age.

"That's my dad, isn't it?" she asked, turning her head to continue looking through the large glass windows that lined the front of the house.

"Yes," he said, noting Bella and Edward had taken seats on the couch. He could hear them, but he tuned out the conversation to focus on his daughter.

"I look like him," she said quietly, tugging on the long coppery curl she lifted to stare at.

He'd always thought she resembled Bella more, especially as she got older. Mae had Edward's symmetry in the placement of her features and his cheekbones, but the rest was all Bella.

"A little, but you have your mother's eyes," he said, sighting the most obvious feature that she'd inherited. It was also his favorite. He'd have missed the riot and swirls of chocolate and bark if they'd been lost forever.

"Is he staying… or… " she asked, glancing back through the window. Confusion, sadness, longing, and anger all twisted about her, impossibly knotted together. It'd take some time to work through it all.

"How much do you know about him?" Jasper asked, trying to judge what she wanted and needed most just then.

It took a moment for her to speak, and when she did, it was hesitant, as if fearing a rebuke. "Jacob's told me some stuff," she admitted, making him realize she didn't want Jake to get in trouble for sharing.

Of course Jacob had told her. It was a constant struggle for the wolf to deny her something, anything, she wanted. Jacob was probably how Mae had picked up the habit of referring to Edward as dad since no one else in the family did.

Jasper waited. Giving her the look that said, 'Spill, Renesmee'. It always worked.

With an exasperated huff, she finally said, "He said dad got scared, and had to go away to work through it." Not bad, mutt. "Was he scared of me?"

"No, poppet. Everyone loves you. But when you love someone, then you have something you could lose. Your dad was scared of what could happen," Jasper said, bending to kiss the top of her head and letting her feel his love. She smiled, hugging him.

"Are you scared? About those people coming to hurt us?" she asked, knowing far too much for her tender months, but there had been no way to shelter her completely.

"Yes," he admitted, determined to always be honest with her. "But you don't have to be. We're going to be all right."

For a couple minutes they watched Bella and Edward through the window. He heard Bella asking, "Do you think this has helped you grow enough that maybe someday you could fall in love again? Maybe try to do things differently, not make the same mistakes? I don't want you to be alone forever."

"Would you like to get to know him?" Jasper inquired, sensing more curiosity from the little one he held.

"But you're my papa," she said, fear multiplying faster than rabbits.

The remark made it apparent just how short her life had been up to this point. Intelligence and appearance didn't equal experience. The discrepancy was lessening, but there was still a way to go.

She hadn't met other families outside them and the Blacks - not even most of the other wolves' extended families. Mae didn't even watch television to pick up on the multitude of variations families could come in. Just one or two movies. She didn't know she could have two fathers.

"And that won't ever change. You can have both of us in your life though, if you'd like," he explained, attempting to make sure she understood he wasn't going anywhere, and that this wasn't an either or situation.

"I'm mad that he didn't want me, and that he's only now here," she admitted. "You said he left because he was scared. But momma and I are fine. It's been months and months. Why didn't he come sooner? Or call, maybe. Unless he didn't want me."

Jasper glanced through the window to find Edward and Bella watching. Edward's face was a mask of agony. He was being burned alive.

_I'm sorry, Edward,_ Jasper thought. His brother's eyes closed and he nodded. Edward wouldn't force the issue.

"You're allowed to be angry with him. But don't let that stop you from meeting him. People can be forgiven. Sometimes they even deserve to be. And someday you may be able to have a relationship with him like ours," Jasper said, kissing her head again.

"Maybe," she said, doubtful.

He was surprised, given her reaction to Edward's Christmas gift. But back then, Edward had been little more than an idea, a vaguely defined, distant figure. Now he was here in person, a solid, unavoidable presence that she had to process. One she had to figure out how fit in her little, familiar world. The one that had already been turned upside down very recently.

"There are a lot of people waiting inside to meet you. Would you like to go in?" he suggested, testing the waters.

"I don't want to face him yet. Do I have to?"

"No. You can wait until you're ready," Jasper promised.

* * *

13 days

Mae had no trouble winning over the Denalis. It was just like with Garrett. Carmen, in particular, was entranced, murmuring in Spanish and exclaiming encouragingly when Mae replied, showing off all that she had learned while in Central America. Even Leah had grudgingly smiled at her when she'd come over the next day after visiting her mom.

The only one not won over was Irina. Jasper had shied away from her almost immediately. His cousin was empty. A blackhole, a vacuum stucking all joy and happiness from the area around her. Jasper had come across others like her in his life. It was evidence of a deep depression. Losing Laurent was not something she was going to recover from. Possibly ever. It was the type of pain he'd feared Edward experiencing. The kind a person didn't often recover from, even with help. She was there, at least physically if not wholly. She'd even mastered the act of fooling her family based on appearances.

Not a word was said about it though. Jasper intended to respect her privacy. If Edward, who had a direct line to her thoughts for months now hadn't brought it up, then he wouldn't either. But he couldn't bear to be near her himself. The negative energy was too much for him to handle for extended periods of time.

Garrett had convinced Kate to help train Bella. Now those two, Jasper really enjoyed being around. Garrett was smitten and Kate was amused by it. The potential was there. Now they only had to seize on it.

The best break in training came when Kate tried to use her gift against Bella and was so shocked by its failure that Bella had knocked Kate flat on her back. They'd already learned that Bella was a shield, thanks to Alice, and Eleazer had confirmed it.

Bella's success had inspired Garrett to try his luck, despite the other's warnings, and it had been hilarious when Kate zapped him with a single finger, laying the man full out. After that, Garrett was a total goner for the lithe blonde.

Knowing about Bella's shield also became a big factor in planning how they would handle the Volturi. It was the edge they needed to kick things off right. Jazz almost had it figured out. It'd been easier this last week since the Denalis came. More bodies meant better odds. If only there was something else he could use, some other advantage. But he'd work with what he had. He'd done it before - granted the stakes weren't as high.

Mostly, he just had to figure out how to eliminate Alec without killing him. Jasper had to keep reminding himself that they could always kill him later - assuming there was a later. Even if it went against the grain to spare him now - and made things significantly more difficult to plan. So, all that _and_ get Bella's fighting skill proficient enough to rival the boy's long enough for the rest of them to have a chance. Well, one other thing too - for them all to survive.

No problem, right?

He was watching Bella spar with Garrett when Edward joined him.

"I never would have been all right letting her fight," Edward said, a touch disapprovingly. He was still protective of Bella. Jasper didn't take offense. He was the same with Alice. It was their way. In their very nature.

"I think it's amusing that you think I could stop her - or that I'd even try," Jasper remarked dryly.

"And therein lies the difference. The reason you are better suited for her. Why she's… happier with you than she ever was with me. I'm glad they've had you," Edward whispered softly.

"How hard was that to say?"

"I only choked a little," Edward quipped, bantering more easily than he ever had before. It was in that moment that Jasper realized Bella wasn't the only one to change. Edward had too. He was a little more lighthearted than before. Quicker to tease and more open to being teased - less serious and tortured.

"About like eating human food?" Jasper tried, wanting to see if it was a one off or if it would last.

"Close," Edward said, one side of his lips twisting to hint at a smile, but Jasper felt his genuine humor.

"I'm sorry I hurt you. We should have talked about this sooner," Jasper said softly. _Though it was a little hard once you took off._

"Touche. She's not the Bella I remember."

"She's confident, capable, won't be lead around anymore - or content to be coddled and wrapped safely in bubble wrap, left behind," Jasper said, noting some of his favorite qualities in her.

"I just wanted to protect her humanity, didn't want her to regret what an association with us would force her to give up," Edward said, defending his choices, but it was said more out of habit than anything else.

"She can make those decisions for herself," Jasper said, proud of the woman he'd chosen as his mate. The one that had chosen him as well.

"I'd have eventually made her miserable, even if I'd stayed. She'd have constantly been trying to make herself less in order to stay the girl I first met, rather than the woman she's become," Edward acknowledged, just as Bella knocked Garrett's feet out from under him and crowed triumphantly, dancing around with her arms raised in victory. It had been an excellent match. She was really getting the hang of it - just in time too.

"We'll make an effort to always include you in decisions regarding Mae," Jasper offered, a small consolation prize.

"You're different too," Edward noted. Had he? Hmm, he guessed that was true. Jasper felt Edward's approval, and… happiness. He was truly glad Jasper had made peace with his past, and had become so altered - even if it was because of his relationship with Bella that he'd managed it.

Jasper hesitated, not wanting to hurt Edward, but then he said, "Thank you. For bringing her into our lives."

Edward nodded. Contentment settled over him. He too was making peace with his past and the current place it had lead him to. Jasper debated mentioning what he'd picked up happening between Edward and Leah -

"No," Edward said sharply, the tone like jagged ice, freezing the thought before it had even finished crystallizing.

All right then.

* * *

12 Days

Bella looked troubled that night when they reached the cottage.

"If it came down to it - her or me - who would you save?"

"Her. Mae comes first," Jasper admitted, though he recoiled from the very idea of ever having to make the choice. It screeched through him, jaring and wrong, like nails on a chalkboard.

"That's how it should be," Bella assured him.

"Yes," he agreed.

"You know I love you, right?" Bella said, letting him know she'd heard his conversation with Edward.

"I felt the difference, Bella. I know I'm the one you love. But I wouldn't have needed my gift to believe it," he said, sliding his arms around her and stealing her lips in a kiss that said more than words could ever dream to. Words were powerful, but this was more. Essential. Certain.

"I need her safe. If something goes wrong… " Bella said, breaking off, though she twisted closer, trying to eliminate all space between them as she conformed herself to him.

"There is a way," Jasper started. He didn't need to say more for her to understand.

"Alice," Bella declared, the name an explanation in itself. It was the reason Alice hadn't come home too. She was needed elsewhere just then.

"Alice would die to keep her safe."

"She can't go alone, and we're needed here," Bella said, nibbling on her lower lip as she looked at him, worry lines creasing her forehead. He felt the agony cutting her, swallowed razor blades working their way through her digestive tract and tearing holes along the way.

"We can ask Jacob to take her," Jasper said, knowing it was the only solution Bella would agree to. He was the only one Bella would trust with Mae.

Jasper felt the same.


	22. 22: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there may be a few bits from the book - there might actually be lines from each book, and this just covers my bases. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 22 - Bella

14 Days

"How do you think this is going to work? Are you moving back here?" Bella asked, moving to sit on the couch. This seemed like a good opportunity to continue practicing acting human. She needed the distraction now that Jasper had left the room. Edward moved to join her. Sitting as far away as possible.

"I'm here to help with the Volturi, Bella. The rest, after that, I suppose is up to you," Edward said, staring at her as if she was a stranger. It was disconcerting. He was the one unfamiliar to her. Like a childhood friend with whom she'd lost contact, but was suddenly supposed to carry on a conversation with.

"What if I asked you to leave?" she wondered aloud. She wanted to know if he'd take off again at the drop of a hat or as soon as things didn't go his way.

"Then I would respect your decision," he said, nodding gravely. "I would understand if you didn't want me to be in her life at all. After the things I've done, and the way I've behaved."

'_I'm a monster, Bella. A killer,' _the memory of his self-analysis floated through her mind, more an impression or smoke dissipating. '_What if I'm the bad guy?'_

This man - boy really, because it was impossible to see him as anything more than a teenager - was so quick to be negative and think the worst of himself. Hasty action followed by self-recriminations. That was his pattern. Was he really ready for the responsibility of becoming a parent? Could he handle it? It wasn't something he could bail on if they did let him into Mae's life.

"You wouldn't fight to stay?" she demanded. Jasper had said Edward vowed repeatedly to never leave again after they returned from Italy last spring, but she remembered that he had - twice.

"Honestly, Bella? I don't truly know what I would do. This isn't something I could get a second chance with, and I've already missed so much of Renesmee's life. I'd probably try to persuade you to at least let me see her occasionally," he said, looking out the window to where Jasper stood holding Mae.

She watched as his face morphed, despair and anguish melting away until only wonder remained. She recognized the feeling. It was how she felt whenever she realized she'd created that little girl. Mae was a treasure. One that deserved to be shared, not cosseted away the way kings and the wealthy did with their art and jewels.

And the effect Mae had on people, the way she brought out the best - well, Bella wanted that for Edward too. Seeing him now. She could picture her younger self loving him. Enough people had told her just how much Edward had been the center of her universe. Now he had nothing. Bella couldn't bring herself to wish that for him. For the sake of what they once shared, for the life he'd helped her find, she wanted him to be happy too. Mae could do that.

"I would at least do that much," he added more confidently, eyes never straying from viewing his daughter for the first time in person - even if it was through a pane of glass.

"Good. You can't just show up and leave if things get tough. You're the parent, and you'll have to act like one. You won't be able to take off whenever you have a rocky go of it," Bella said, trying to explain her hesitation and misgivings so he'd be prepared to handle them. "Because at some point that is bound to happen."

"You're going to let me… " he said wonderingly, head whipping back around to face her. She shifted, folding her hands in her lap and reminding herself to blink.

"I won't keep her from you. But I won't force her to have a relationship with you either. It'll be her decision, and I'll expect you to respect it," she said, trying not to snap at him as she included the last part. She'd just recalled that he struggled to respect others' decisions when they differed from what he thought the best course of action to be.

"I will," he vowed.

"But so help me, Edward. If you pull what you did when I was pregnant," Bella warned.

"Bella, I am so sorry. I didn't mean a word of what I said. I only said that because I thought I could force your hand - as if I had that much power over you," Edward said, shaking his head regretfully.

"You did, once," Bella acknowledged softly.

"But no longer," Edward agreed. "Still, for you to believe that I would kill our daughter. I thought only of finding a way to save you. During our reunion - after the Volturi - you convinced me that I was all you'd ever want. That I alone was enough for you. That you would do anything to be with me. I'd told you repeatedly that I couldn't live in a world where you didn't, and you were so close to death everyday when you were pregnant. I've seen what it was like. At any moment it could have happened, and I would have been left here without you."

He seemed determined to make her understand where he'd been coming from. How confused he'd been. A child in over his head. There was an urgency in his words, as well as a plea.

"Edward -"

"Please hear me out. I truly believed you would always put me first, then when it counted - you were choosing death. You were choosing her over me - us. I'm selfish. I've always been upfront about that. So that situation - it made me crazed. I lashed out. It was a mistake. I understand now that we will never be like that again - never be in that position. Because there is no us. Not anymore. You moved on the way I once hoped you would," he finished, and Bella heard the acceptance that accompanied the words. It was unexpected, but very welcome. It made this situation significantly less uncomfortable.

"Probably not the way you expected though, huh?"

"Decidedly not. Though it is fair, and exactly what I deserve," he said, chuckling darkly. "Please believe me, Bella. I didn't mean the threat. If I could go back and never say it, I would," he added, glancing back outside as though unable to resist.

"I know that now. But I won't stand for you putting her through something like that - ever."

"I've accepted that things will never be the way they were, but I can't help remembering when you said the way you felt about me would never change. That you would always love me. That there was nothing I could do about it to change your feelings," Edward said, getting lost in his musings. He wasn't accusatory, just confused.

It was a request to help him understand.

She'd probably echoed those words so many times that he truly was baffled to find out that in the end, she hadn't meant them anymore than he'd meant his threat. The situations and circumstances were entirely different, but neither had kept their vows to the other.

"Edward, I stopped loving you," Bella informed him, face pinched as she shared the painful truth. Edward opened his mouth, as if to stop her, but then he closed it, determined to hear her out. Good. She deserved to have her say after everything. "I was a teenager when I fell in love with you. You overwhelmed me. Consumed me before I had grown into myself."

"You consumed me as well," Edward acknowledged, smiling ruefully as if it reminded him of something bittersweet.

But then she had his attention again. He was curious to see where she was going with this, and what she wanted him to know.

"I remember more now than when I first woke - others have filled in the gaps - but I haven't fallen back in love with you," Bella said, watching Edward closely with blazing, rose-gold eyes. "I changed when you refused to change me, and after you broke my heart several times over, Edward.

"I stopped being a teenage girl in love with a teenage boy. I stopped being in a place where that love was all that mattered, and I couldn't imagine going a single moment without seeing you and being with you. I stopped being a dramatic girl, where losing your love was equivalent to the end of the world.

"You hurt me, but I survived, and surviving altered me. Then I changed even more. I changed in ways you didn't. Ways I don't think you'll ever be able to change in. I grew up. My needs and desires shifted. I matured. I became a mother. Renesmee is the center of my universe now - not you, not even Jasper. Everything I do is for her, not myself or my mate.

"And now we don't fit anymore. Part of you still seems to be the same angsty teenage boy that I can hardly remember since so much has changed. I hope for Mae's sake as well as your own, that you don't cling to the past," Bella concluded, pouring her heart out after months of figuring out exactly what she wanted to say if given the chance. She hoped her words sounded as mature as she intended them to. Hoped they emphasized the differences she'd highlighted between them.

"That makes sense. I'm so sorry that my actions caused you such pain, and forced such changes on you. I don't regret all of it, however. I can see how you are now. I always said I only wanted you to be happy, and you are - present situation notwithstanding, of course," Edward said wryly.

"Of course," Bella echoed, shocked that Edward was taking this so well. Maybe he wasn't quite as angsty as she remembered. Or maybe he'd grown just enough too. Maybe there was hope that he really could be a father to Mae.

"Do you think this has helped you grow enough that maybe someday you could fall in love again? Maybe try to do things differently, not make the same mistakes? I don't want you to be alone forever," Bella said, speaking the sentiments before she'd even realized they were true.

"Did Alice put you up to that?" he asked, entirely unimpressed.

"Alice? What does she have to do with this?" Bella asked, confused. Did that mean -

"Nothing. Just drop it, please," he said, derailing her thought as he gasped, looking back outside. "She doesn't want to meet me," he acknowledged in an anguished whisper.

"Maybe not today, but I have a feeling she'll change her mind," Bella said, reaching across the space separating them to pat his hand, offering the only comfort she could. He didn't even acknowledge her. Mae was the sole focus of his attention.

* * *

13 Days

It wasn't until the next day that Mae asked to speak with Edward. Bella agreed to stay with her for the meeting too.

"Hello, Renesmee. It's very nice to meet you," Edward said gently, standing from the couch when Bella and Mae came inside the main house. He must have heard them coming and known from Mae's thoughts that she was ready for this.

"I know who you are," Mae said, the words tinkling like a chorus of bells. Edward's lips parted slightly, and Bella saw his amazement as he carefully studied her, memorizing the sight and every detail of this first meeting. She'd done the same when she first woke.

"You do?" he prodded.

"You're my father," Mae announced, hesitantly stepping closer the way a mouse approaches peanut butter on a mousetrap - desirous, but afraid to get hurt.

Edward's face lit upon hearing her call him her father. A wide smile stretched across his handsome face until all of his gleaming teeth were visible and rainbows formed where the light reflected. Mae seemed drawn to the smile, and Bella wondered if she'd once been the same, caught up in the tractor beam he projected with his attention. It was.. dazzling.

"I guess I am, Renesmee," Edward said, savoring her name like a fine wine. "You want to know why I left," he said suddenly.

"I didn't -" she denied, startled because she hadn't said anything about it.

Bella was tempted to scold him for reading her thoughts, but there wasn't exactly an off switch on his gift. Apparently Mae hadn't inherited Bella's ability to block Edward. Unfortunately, it also meant he got to hear every unkind and accusatory thought Mae directed at him. And there undoubtedly many. Well… guess that was karma. Sort of made up for her not giving him hell for his actions.

"But you do?" he prompted, moving to sit back down on the couch and patting the spot next to him. Mae went willingly.

"Yes," she said, scooting around to get comfortable, and nervously tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Do you remember when that stranger, Santiago, threatened you?" Edward asked. When she nodded, he continued, asking, "What did you want to do?"

"Grab momma and run away," Mae admitted, smiling sheepishly over at Bella and twisting one of her long curls around her index finger. "Or wait for Jacob since I knew he'd protect me."

Edward caught Bella's eye at the Jacob reference, but it was just a quick flash. She wondered if he was remembering Bella's history with the wolf or Mae's future. Both would likely drive him a little crazy. Again, karma.

"Why?"

"The things he said, the way he looked at me - I was scared he'd hurt us," Mae admitted. It killed Bella that her daughter had already been exposed to that degree of fear, but there was nothing she could do about it.

"When Bel- your mother," Edward quickly corrected, stumbling a bit on the word mother - it'd been an adjustment for her too - then continued, "was pregnant, I was scared like that. I thought I'd lose her, so I ran away."

Edward's explanation was exponentially simplified, but true nonetheless. Truthfully, it really had all boiled done to fear. Fear of death. Fear of rejection. Fear of consequences.

"But she's fine, and I… "

"I wasn't brave. Not like you and your momma were when you faced Santiago. I let fear win, then I was too scared to face everyone. I didn't think you could ever forgive me," he admitted, tentatively reaching out to touch the curl she still played with. He trailed his fingers over it softly, marveling at the fact she was real.

"I do. I forgive you," Mae said, catching his hand in hers. She was so quick to love everyone, and possessed such an enormous heart. It had shocked Bella the day before when Mae had said she didn't want to meet him. But she'd figured their meeting, even delayed as it was, would go down something like this.

"I'd like to get to know you… if you're willing," Edward requested, voice thick with tears that could never be shed.

"I can show you," Mae offered, reaching out her hand.

He didn't mention that he was already watching her thoughts and memories play out inside her head, just accepted the offered palm, and placed it gently against his cheek as he said, "I'd like that very much."

Bella watched Edward's eyes close as he watched the memories, his face becoming bittersweet, though he laughed and asked questions occasionally, seeming to know she wanted him to - and with his gift, of course that was exactly what was happening.

It took close to two hours before she stopped.

"I want to get to know you too, but I don't want to hurt papa," Mae admitted.

"You have your mother's heart. You're capable of loving more than one person at a time. That won't change the fact that Jasper is your papa. If you decide you want to know something, just ask. I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

11 Days

The night before, Bella and Jasper had made the decision to send Mae to Alice. This morning Jasper had Mae, and together they were telling Edward while she was asking Jake if he'd take her. She'd called him and asked him to come over. There had only been one time he'd been over since they'd returned, and that was with Sam to let her know that the packs would fight alongside them. Jasper had been reconfiguring his plan ever since to include them.

"Hi, Jake," Bella said when he came up to join her on the porch swing. He set it to swinging more vigorously than the swing was really meant for and the anchors groaned out a warning.

"Uh oh. What's wrong now, Bells?" Jacob demanded, sighing and rubbing a hand over his face. He could still read her so easily.

"If I asked you to do something… " she began, but trailed off. Was this fair of her to even ask? Should she have asked Rose instead? As far as skill went, Jacob was the better candidate.

Jake brought the swing to a stop, leaning forward with his hands clasped and dangling between his spread knees. He turned his head to study her intently. "I'm not going to like this, am I?"

"No. But I'm going to ask anyways. And I know this time you'll agree," she said, remembering another time she'd asked him not to fight. She blinked away the disjointed image of floating through the forest as the wolf refused. "Jasper and I need you to take Mae to Alice, and stay to watch over her."

"You're asking me to leave my pack. Mine, because I became an alpha to protect you. To have the people that follow me fight while I run away," he demanded, pain unmistakable. His argument actually surprised her a little, particularly the depth of his anguish as he spoke about his pack. She was missing something. But her daughter's safety trumped everything else.

Bella wondered if any alpha in the history of the packs had ever ordered his wolves to fight while he hid. Because that was essentially what she was asking him to do - hide, out of danger, safe.

"Yes. That's exactly what I'm asking," she said. His eyes closed, and he understood too. Clearly the urge to protect her daughter overrode all loyalty Bella felt to the pack - even Seth since he was returning to fight as well. He'd temporarily given up Alice to risk his life for the Cullens. Jake would be an asset in the coming fight, and she was willing to risk the rest of her family by sending him away if it meant keeping Mae safe.

"So what? Are you trying to save me like you did with the newborns when you asked me to kiss you? Only since that wasn't motivation enough this time you're using my imprint to do it?" he asked angrily, but she'd already sensed his surrender.

He already knew he'd do it, he just wanted to mouth off first because he was pissed to be forced to choose. Not really a choice for him though. That was the magic of the imprint. She always came first. For both of them, it was the same.

"Actually I'm trying to save her. You're just the only one I trust with her safety," Bella said candidly.

Jacob released a single bark of a laugh, as if her statement was ironic somehow. Bella was tempted to ask, but dark shadows had gathered in his eyes, closing him off, away from her.

"Bells… "

"I think this is the real reason you imprinted on her."

"Probably," he agreed, without a moment of doubt or hesitation.

"So you'll do it?"

"Sure, sure," he muttered. "How soon do we leave?"

"A few days. Alice will be expecting you."

"Guess I need to talk to Sam and Leah - separately. God, this is going to be fun making them work together," he grumbled sarcastically.

Bella had forgotten that Leah was his second, and if he was out, then Leah was in charge.

* * *

10 Days

Jake came back the next day, asking if he could spar with them. Said he needed to work off the tension. Quil and Embry had come with, eager to fight as well, if for different reasons. Bella had heard Edward on the phone with Leah the night before, and guessed the last minute team up hadn't gone well.

Jake and Kate were going head to head, or head to muzzle as the case was, when Kate surprised him with a shock strong enough to have him howling on ground. It was the first time he'd been zapped, but Bella thought his reaction was a little extreme. The howls sounded like they were coming from multiple directions as they echoed through the training yard they'd set up.

For several moments everyone stilled, then all at once each person seemed to come to the same realization. The wolf howls were echoing because there were three different wolves crying out, despite Kate only touching Jake.

"Are you seeing this?" Jasper asked, searching the assembled faces.

The words broke the trance and Kate jerked her hand back at once, staring at her fingers in mystification.

"What just happened?" Bella demanded, going to kneel by Jake as Garrett and Emmett checked on Quil and Embry, respectively.

"It's the pack mind," Edward said, coming from the house. "They're so connected. I can hear it in their minds - if the alpha is hurt, they all are if they're in wolf form. Leah's the only one not affected since she hasn't shifted."

"No," Bella denied, "Jake's had cuts and scrapes, and Santiago broke his ribs, but none of that showed up on Embry."

"Maybe it's just vampire gifts," Garrett speculated, patting the giant wolf's heaving side. The shock of the unintended reaction meant Kate had zapped Jake for a lot longer than normal, and apparently the wolves' recovery time wasn't as quick as the vampire's was.

"Yes, I'll get him," Edward murmured, likely in answer to someone's silent request, even as he disappeared back into the house.

"Jacob? Are you going to make it?" Bella asked ruefully. He huffed, letting his huge head roll into her lap. Almost at once he snorted, shaking his head and turning it away. Served him right. There was drool on her pants now.

Edward returned with Eleazer beside him. The Denali vampire looked astonished.

"Kate, can you show me?" Embry whimpered, and Eleazar amended, "A lower setting perhaps?"

"Yeah, sorry. I like to make an impression the first time. It usually makes people think twice before attacking again. It won't be so bad this time, or as long. You ready?" she asked, holding her hand out to hover over Jacob. He seemed to roll his eyes, which she took to mean consent and touched his russet fur lightly.

Once more all three wolves whimpered. Bella's phone rang once, and she saw that it was Alice. Guess Seth was feeling it too - even at the bottom of the world. The screen went black before she could open it, and another phone began to chime. Edward's. He chuckled as he answered, giving his sister a brief rundown once Kate stopped electrocuting Jake.

"Well? Do you think it could work? He won't be there," Jasper said, directing the confusing words to Eleazar. He must have been the one to ask for the other vampire. Bella hadn't gotten to know him much, and was currently lost, unable to follow their conversation.

Jake sat up, watching them.

"You think this will help take advantage of his limitations?" Eleazar mused, troubled.

"Yes - sorry, Bella," Jasper said, looking from Eleazar to Bella. "Let me explain. Eleazar was once a member of the Volturi guard. He understands how Alec's gift works. I've been trying to come up with a plan that capitalizes on the weaknesses of his ability to immobilize everyone. If this is correct, it makes me far more confident that we will succeed with the wolves' help."

Bella couldn't picture Eleazar as a member of the Volturi guard. She might not know him well yet, but she could tell he was kind, compassionate, and devoted to the vegetarian lifestyle. The last alone hinted that he wouldn't mesh with the ruling Voturi. To them human life was expendable, not worth respecting. While the Cullens and Denalis revered it. She'd have to ask Jasper more later. She wanted to understand, but now wasn't the time.

Jake got up and went to the tree he'd stashed his clothes behind before the fight, coming back in his human skin less than ten seconds later. He'd perfected the art of dressing quickly. It helped that it was only a pair of cutoffs. No shirt. No shoes. No being left out of the conversation, apparently.

"You sure?" Jake said, ignoring the others and asking Embry. He and Quil had sat up too, and he nodded. "Before we talk about this more, try it on Embry. We need to see if it works both ways. And can I talk to Seth?"

Edward handed off the phone.

"I'm fine, swear. You good there?" Jake said into the phone. Bella assumed he was worried because Seth may have been doing something that would have left him vulnerable when the shocks temporarily downed him. Particularly since he wouldn't have seen them coming from so far away.

"Good point," Jasper acknowledged, eyes distant as he plotted and planned.

Nodding, Kate went over to the grey and black wolf, touching him with just the tips of her fingers. Embry trembled, the electricity making his muscles seize. Little hairs along his spine rose in response to the sensations.

"He feel anything? Quil and I are good here," Jake told Seth and Alice. Seth must have phased again to check that he didn't feel Embry getting shocked.

_He's fine. You're not going to do that again, are you? A little warning next time if you plan on it._ Bella heard Alice chide through the speaker.

"Sure, sure," Jacob agreed indulgently.

_You okay, man?_ Seth asked, he must have phased back to ask. _I heard -_

"Yes," Jake said, the word clipped and screaming that the subject was closed. "We'll talk soon," Jake said, disconnecting the call abruptly.

"So what's the plan, Jazz?" Emmett asked as Jake finished his conversation. Jasper looked supremely disappointed that Kate's gift still worked on Embry.

"I'd hoped… I still need a couple days. There are a few tweaks and kinks I still need to work through," he hedged, glancing at Eleazar. He wanted more information before he decided anything.

"How _does_ Alec's gift work?" Bella asked, assuming the others all already knew, but wanting to understand as well.

"It's like anesthesia. It causes a person to feel nothing. It creeps slowly, the way the doctor has the patient count backwards. It takes time to set in, but you know it's coming, and he can use it on countless individuals at once - unlike Jane," Eleazar said.

"How is nothing a bad thing?" Jake asked, clearly unimpressed with the supposed offensive threat they'd all been shaking in their boots over. Embry and Quil's wolf grunts echoed the doubt.

"It's total sensory deprivation. No sight, sound, or smell. No movement even - just dead weight holding you in place. Nothing to aid you to allow you to defend yourself. Only blackness. Endless blackness until nothing remains of you at all because you've been destroyed," Eleazar expanded, the words coming slowly, softly, inevitably - much like Alec's gift.

Bella saw it now. Stone statues spread out like sculptures in a museum garden. Unresisting as each one was summarily lit aflame, burning to ash and cinder. Gone. Forever. All without uttering a single protest.

"Does it spread all around him? Can it be blocked?" Jasper asked, and Bella could already see his mind whirling. Rearranging troops on the imaginary board before him.

"Hmm, no, I suppose not or the other guards wouldn't be able to execute the accused. But it is far reaching - he doesn't have to be close to use it. We could all be immobilized before we ever saw him coming, and Bella's ability is probably the only gift that could hope to stop it. Nothing physical can stand in its way," Eleazar answered, dashing many of their hopes, even as he confirmed what she'd assumed about herself.

"And there's no way I can use my shield to help the rest of you?" Bella asked, forlornly.

"Right. It took me six hundred years just to learn to extend my gift over my arms instead of only focused in my palms. Then another four hundred to project it over my whole body," Kate said, shaking her head at Bella's zealous ambition.

"But you think she can learn to?" Edward asked, studying Kate and Eleazar.

"She'd be a formidable opponent once she did," Eleazar whispered, staring at Bella, a little star struck.

"There's not time now, but someday," Kate agreed.

Edward's expression was calculating. Bella felt like he viewed her as a rook in a game of chess. Better than being a pawn she guessed.

"But I can still fight Alec, right? So the rest of you can fight the others?" Bella asked, shaking off the feeling that Edward was thinking moves ahead when they still needed to worry about the next one.

If she could just keep Alec occupied long enough, the others would stand a chance. An easy choice. Easier than the alternative of standing by and watching Carlisle die.

Jasper didn't comment, his musings were all directed internally. The frown on Edward's face as he watched his brother said a lot. And that was yet another difference between the two. Jasper understood her desire to fight and help protect the family. She had an ability that made her supremely suited for the task. So he would use her to give everyone the best shot. Edward probably would have told her it was too dangerous, and with so many assembled and willing to fight, she was rendered unnecessary.

"Does any of this help - wolves, my shield, any of it?" Bella finally inquired, because honestly, she still couldn't see the significance. Strategy was not her forte. Jasper met her gaze with a noncommittal pinched expression. So he wasn't sure. Well, at least he didn't look defeated by the news.

"It does make it less likely that we can't win," Jasper finally concluded, looking at Edward, who nodded as well. Though Edward looked a lot less confident.

"I'm not going down without a fight," Emmett insisted, pushing on the fingers of one hand then the other as if he was cracking his knuckles. A useless gesture for vampires, but the implied message was there.

"Well said," Garrett agreed.

"Great. So it's not a certain death sentence anymore," Jake said flatly. Bella was having a hard time getting a read on him today. Guess she had yesterday too, but she'd been too worried about Mae to truly recognize what she was seeing. Something was troubling him, and she thought it went beyond missing the fight. "Although, not to throw a wrench in the new plan you're drumming up with this information, but you should know - Sam's decided the youngest in his pack won't be fighting. There are too many that need protecting on the rez, and he doesn't want to risk my being the sole surviving wolf left to pass on the gene."

"He doesn't think you're up for it," Em guffawed, all innuendo.

"No. He doesn't," Jacob stated woodenly, lips twisted in a bitter grimace.

What had happened between yesterday and today? This was definitely more than just having to leave Washington.

"Jacob," Edward said, dismay and compassion encompassing the name so completely that all of the animosity from their former relationship had vanished entirely.

"Don't," Jake warned, silencing his former rival. Edward slowly nodded, respecting the request not to share the wolf's secrets.

"More for us," Em said, returning the conversation to the original topic, and taking the spotlight off Jake.

"How many does that leave us with?" Jasper inquired.

Jake hesitated, clearly uncomfortable divulging any of the pack's secrets. He looked around, eyes lingering on the Denalis present, Eleazar and Kate, and Garrett. "Four from mine. Three from Sam's, including him."

If the news troubled Jasper, he gave no indication, just nodded and let a blank mask fall over his features. He actually looked a bit like Alice while she was having a vision.

Bella and Garrett settled into sparing again. Time was running out and she couldn't put off training, much as she'd like to in order to corner her best friend and demand some answers. He, Embry, and Quil had vanished inside to consume large quantities of the food Esme had prepared for them that morning.

She'd learned that Quil and Emby had taken it upon themselves to visit Esme and Carlisle while the rest of them were gone. Jake had asked them to check in so Esme wouldn't get lonely without her children. When they'd all come home, it was to find the wolves stopped in for at least one of their meals each day and a quick chat. Embry even had Carlisle tutoring him in chemistry all through March and April so that he wouldn't fail and have to repeat his final semester of high school.

It wasn't even two hours later that Leah showed up. Her face was the classical drama mask - split evenly into two conflicting emotions. One side was pissed off while the other was concerned. Jacob heard her coming and came back outside, Quil and Embry flanking him on either side. She went right to Jacob, ignoring all the rest. A gush of air carrying the scent of wolf spread out in her rushing wake.

"Jake, I need to talk to you," she said softly. She obviously intended it to be a private conversation, but they could all hear anyway.

"Did something else happen when I left?" he asked wearily.

"No. Not about that," she said, touching his arm tenderly, and sharing a look of deep understanding and empathy.

"Are you about to tell me something else has happened. On top of what we're currently dealing with?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry, Jake. I just came from my mom's house. She wanted me to tell you that Charlie's coming over after work. He wants answers. He'll probably be here in an hour," Leah said apologetically.

Bella's chest ached at hearing her father referenced. Her chest felt hollowed, her insides scooped out with a rusty spoon. Caught off guard. That was the only way to describe it. Charlie was the last issue she expected to deal with right now.

"My dad's coming over? _Why_?" Bella hissed.

"Paul said that? In front of Charlie? Was he trying to put him at risk?" Edward demanded, looking furious before Leah could answer.

"What answers? Has something happened?" Carlisle asked, coming out and moving to the other side of the porch not currently occupied by wolves.

Jake looked a little caught with all the questions being thrown at him.

Edward looked like he was watching a movie and demanding spoilers about the final scene part way through, even though none of them had seen the movie either. "Does he not understand the danger he put Charlie in? Or does he just not care since it's not his - Was that it? If his family had to be in danger, he wanted ours to be as well?"

"Not everything is about you, Edward," Leah sassed, but it lacked heat. Or any kind of the usual disdain and animosity she typically displayed towards their kind.

"Look, it was an accident. No one intentionally told Charlie anything, but he's smart - he figured out something was up on his own," Jake explained, shrugging helplessly.

"Knowing our secret is a death sentence," Bella whispered fearfully. Jasper flashed to her side in an instant, wrapping a supportive arm around her waist and encouraging her to lean against him.

"He doesn't know you're all vampires - just that something's up," Jacob assured her. Then he tossed a glare at Edward for good measure since he was the one that spooked her with his mindreading and half explained statements taken out of context.

"Perhaps you'd better explain so we can handle this situation properly," Jasper prodded, sending waves of serenity to everyone gathered. It helped refocus and center Bella.

"Paul came over to my dad's yesterday while Charlie was there. Right after I got home from here. It didn't go over well when I told Sam, who was already pissed at me. Then Sam told Paul, and he wanted to give me a piece of his mind about having to fight again for your family," Jacob explained.

"We aren't asking him to risk his life for us," Carlisle insisted, ever seeking peace rather than war.

Jasper looked ready to protest. His plan hinged on having their support, and he at least wasn't willing to risk his family by excluding the wolves.

"You think the wolves are just going to let their kind traipse in here, kill at will, then leave unscathed? Unlikely," Emmett suggested.

"He's right," Jacob said. "It's fine. It's what we do."

"Then why is Paul so upset? I thought that one liked fighting," Emmett wondered.

"Rachel's pregnant. They just found out a couple days ago, then he found out I wasn't even going to be there," Jacob explained, not saying more about what was actually said by either wolf in the other pack.

The news about Rachel hit Bella hard though. Pregnant. In danger. And scared. She could relate.

"No one should be forced to participate who doesn't wish to," Carlisle repeated, again offering the out and fully expecting Jake to take it and pass on the welcome news to Sam.

The urge to agree with Carlisle and insist the packs not fight, but rather stay in La Push to protect Rachel and her unborn child, was strong. Stronger yet, was the desire to protect her own family. She cared about the wolves, yes. Loved them even. But she loved Jasper and Carlisle more. They needed fighters. They needed the wolves. Everyone would be safer if they fought beside the Cullens and Denalis. Numbers would be their greatest advantage. It was enough for her to keep her mouth clamped shut and let the others decide.

"Yeah, doc? And what happens if this goes wrong because there weren't enough of us?" Jake asked, clearly thinking along the same lines as Bella. "My pack has to fight - I need them to be there since I can't, and they want to be. What's to stop the Volturi from seeking out Sam's pack on the reservation later? They'll know about us once my pack fights. You don't think they won't want to make sure no one else can stand against them in the future even if they're victorious over you?"

"Such little faith you have in us," Garrett chided, looking at Jacob like a misinformed child.

"No. I just know our best bet is to have as many good guys there fighting as possible so we win outright. And that includes Sam's pack," Jake said defensively. He stood straighter, addressing Carlisle. "I understand what you're offering, and why. I really do, but I will make sure you have at least three of Sam's wolves fighting with you. I never wanted to be alpha. Never. But now that I am? I have to see _all_ of my people protected as much as possible."

"Jake. Come on, man. We can look after ourselves. We know what we're getting into," Embry said, nudging his side.

"It'll be just like before. We'll fight. It'll be awesome with epic stories to tell after. Everything worked out then, and it will now too," Quil added optimistically.

"Children," Kate sighed, shaking her head a little woefully.

"Infants," Garrett countered.

"I think it would be best if we all cleared out, and let Carlisle handle this without interference," Tanya suggested from inside the house. Bella liked that she hadn't tried to weigh in on the private affair. Liked even more that she'd suggested all the newcomers leave.

There was a mass exodus as Garrett and each of the Denalis zipped away without another word.

"Not to change the subject - actually that's exactly what I'm doing - but what are we going to do about Charlie?" Emmett asked, worry scrunching his forehead.

"Bella? It's up to you," Jasper said, sliding his hand up and down her side.

She wanted this opportunity to see her dad. It might be the only chance she ever got if she died in battle. Would it be fair to Charlie to shock him with her being secretly alive only for her to die in a little over a week?

And the danger? It was forbidden. Breaking laws was why they were in this mess - not that the Volturi weren't just waiting for an excuse to launch an attack. If Edward had just let the venom spread when James bit her, none of this would have happened. The Volturi wouldn't be after them now. But then she also wouldn't have Mae.

Becoming a parent was the greatest event in her life. She'd do anything for her daughter. The same as Charlie would for her. Charlie. Her fragile human father. Right now he was still separate from this life that she'd chosen. Could she really drag him into it?

She wanted to have Mae and Charlie be part of each other's lives. It was a gift she could give them that they deserved.

But fear of the potential danger had her whispering, "He can't know. I won't have him killed because of me."

Jasper watched her carefully, knowing the true extent of her longing. He weighed the situation with all of the usual gravity he gave to potential threats.

"There might be a way that it wouldn't be against the law," Jasper began cautiously.

Edward picked up where he left off, and said, "Charlie is marrying into the La Push tribal council. That means he is allowed to have access to the pack secrets and legends."

"Their need for secrecy rivals our own. It would mean he'd be categorized as an exception to the law - one of those rare humans that knows, and is trusted not to tell any others," Carlisle said, understanding what his sons were suggesting, and elaborating for Bella's sake since she was still so new to this life.

"You could always 'let him make the wrong assumptions'. Wasn't that your plan all along, before you got a load of the new, and… altered you?" Jake suggested.

"I know what it would mean to you to have Charlie in your life. And he could know Mae the way Billy and Carlisle do," Jasper said, tucking her hair behind her ear and letting his fingers linger on her face. Bella felt his love and encouragement. He wanted her to have this.

"How would we explain lying to him about my death? And one look at me -"

"We tell him the truth. Granted it might help to leave out the specifics, but we can tell him as much or as little as you feel comfortable with," Jasper offered.

"I don't want to give him a heart attack," Bella grumbled.

"Charlie's tougher than you give him credit for. He'll handle this like a champ. I bet he won't want specifics just yet - too much to take in. But Sue can slowly ease him in afterwards," Jake said. He looked better than he had, like at least one weight had been lifted from his shoulders. In fact, he looked excited for Charlie to finally find out their secrets.

"I'm going to tell my mom your decision, see if she wants to meet him here to help smooth things over," Leah said, assuming it was a done deal. Without so much as another word she'd vanished, running off into the trees.

Jasper and Edward were sharing an intense look, communicating silently. They'd been at it off and on since Jacob started talking about Charlie.

"No, I won't ask her to lie to him for me," Edward said in answer to whatever Jasper had thought.

She'd deal with that later. They both knew how much she disliked being left out of the conversation when she was clearly the subject of the discussion.

"Will you call Rose and explain?" Bella asked Emmett. Her annoyance would make this more difficult. Mae's presence would help her stay calm. And she wanted to introduce her daughter to Charlie.

Right then Mae was out with Rosalie, Esme, and Carmen having a girl's day. Mae was upset about leaving again when they just got home, so they'd taken her out to cheer her up. It was also serving as their chance to say goodbye since Bella and Jasper planned to monopolize her remaining time in Forks once they got back.

"And, Edward? Unless you want Charlie to shoot you, you'll make yourself scarce until he's had some time to process everything," Bella advised. While it was likely true, it was also partly as payback for excluding her earlier.

He nodded sadly, and retreated back into the house. Probably he planned to hide upstairs listening to music as he usually did when the others were occupied.

"He agreed that you should tell your father he left again, and that you divorced him," Jasper whispered by her ear, trying to make up for his part in frustrating her.

"Augh," Bella groaned, imagining the 'I told you so' she'd get from Charlie.

"Bella, you might want to find another pair of those contacts Alice left for you," Jake suggested, eyeing her critically, as if trying to judge just how different she appeared, and if it really might give Charlie a heart attack.

"Her eyes are hardly the largest change," Jasper quipped, looking at her as well. But when he did, Bella felt his desire welling up and it ignited her own.

Emmett could be heard coughing in the other room. With each of the three fake, rough sounds he said, "Mae," and "Jasper," and "New bod."

The mention of Mae cooled her rising passion, but Bella anticipated getting Jasper alone later that night.

"He's right," Bella said, ignoring Emmett and referring to Jasper's assessment. "Charlie's going to know me like this. I'm not going to hide my eyes, and try to trick him into thinking they alone haven't changed." She was actually quite proud of finally possessing the near golden color that the rest of the family had.

They didn't have to wait long before Charlie arrived, stomping up the stairs and pounding forcefully on the door. He was angry, furious more like. He must have left work early, too impatient for answers since it wasn't even five yet.

"Hello, Charlie," Carlisle greeted, assuming the congenial smile he typically wore at work.

"What has your family got going on with the boys down at the rez?" Charlie demanded, pushing his way inside and facing Carlisle with his arms crossed. "We finally seemed to call a halt to all the hostility from when you first moved here. I won't have it stirred back up again."

"Why don't you have a seat. We have a lot to discuss," Carlisle said, not the least thrown by being accused right off the bat.

"Like why your boy couldn't even come back for Bella's funeral?" Charlie huffed, his renewed hatred for Edward unmistakable.

"About that… why don't you have a seat?" he suggested again. "Some of this will probably come as a bit of a shock."

"Everything's going to be okay, Charlie," Jacob said, coming out of the kitchen.

"Jake? What are you doing here? I thought you hated the Cullens, especially after Bella -"

"Moral support - for you. Seriously, you might want to sit," Jacob said, moving to sit himself so Charlie would follow his example. He did.

"Well, out with it," Charlie insisted, knowing something was up, and wanting them to get on with it. He was over the games. His impatience was nearly palpable.

Carlisle hesitated, not sure what the proper approach to the topic was now that the time had come to do it, so Jake spoke for him, saying, "She's why I'm here… Bella."

Emmett turned on a baseball game, shrugging when the others all looked at him perched in the chair to the side of the couch. It couldn't hurt. Anything to lighten the mood and offer a distraction for her dad.

Bella peaked around the corner to watch, waiting before coming in. Her luck, the shock of seeing her without warning really would kill him. He looked just like she remembered.

"She's alive, Charlie," Jacob said, grinning his most inviting and happy smile. He was restored to the old Jake right then.

"No. We had a funeral. _You_ told me that she was sick - that she died," he said, rounding on Carlisle. Charlie's face took on a ruddy hue that filled the room with additional warmth and the scent of appetizing blood. It reminded her of the mall and airport. Not the actual planes though. The recycled air had been too polluted with stale sweat and body odor.

Bella swallowed venom, squashing her thirst down deep. Disgusted with herself for thinking of her father as food even for a millisecond. He wasn't a walking blood bag. He was her dad!

"She was sick, and she had to change to survive. Fairly drastic changes, and it was dangerous for you to know anything else before now," Carlisle soothed, his careful composure slipping just a fraction.

Silence. Bella watched Charlie looking around like this was not a funny joke. His heart pounded loudly as they waited, unnaturally still to a human's perspective. No one spoke. No one added anything else. They just waited for the truth to sink in.

"Where is she? Bella! What have you done with my daughter, Carlisle?" Charlie roared, standing and moving two steps towards her adoptive father, again yelling, "Bella!"

"Hi, dad," Bella chirped, stepping into full view in the doorway. She winced at the sound, worried that it would only upset him more.

He assessed her, scanning her from head to toe, then doing it again more slowly. The red in his face deepened to more of a puce, extending down his neck before disappearing beneath the collar.

"Bella?" he whispered uncertainly, even doubtfully. He hardly recognized the stranger before him. She barely resembled the daughter he remembered. The one that had died over seven months ago.

"Yeah. It's me," Bella confirmed, lifting her hands out to the side in what she hoped was a helpless human gesture. Emmett's amused snort told her she'd only managed to look ridiculous instead. Oh well, at least she'd tried. She wanted Jasper, but one thing at a time.

"You knew about this?" Charlie demanded horsley, glancing at Jake, but looking back at Bella before he had a chance to reply.

"Dad, I'm sorry we lied, but it was the only way," Bella answered for him, trying to spare him any more grief this day. From the sound of things, others had already been dumping on him. Damn Sam and Paul.

"Only way for what, Bells?" Charlie asked, stepping up to her. It seemed to take a long time for him to reach her. The scent of his blood filled the air, far more appealing than the wolves' that she was used to filling this space. It was easy to ignore though after all these months, and the repeated mental reminders that this was her dad. When Charlie finally reached her, he lifted his hand to touch her cheek. The instant he made contact with her skin, he jerked his hand back, looking from it to her, mystified. At least it wasn't disgust or fear. "What's happened to you?"

Bella opened her mouth to explain, but Charlie stepped back turning in a circle and looking everywhere. "Where is he? This is his doing. Where's Edward?"

"I wanted this. It was my choice. I knew what I was getting into," Bella interrupted, needing her dad to understand no one forced this on her. If Edward had had his way it never would have even happened. For once it wasn't on him - though an argument could be made that the pregnancy forcing it was at least partly his fault - she hadn't knocked herself up.

"You're defending him -"

"Those days are long over," Bella said dryly, with a touch too much emphasis. Charlie seized on it, his eyes narrowing.

"What did he do? Did he leave you when all this happened?"

"It doesn't matter. I actually left him," Bella clarified.

That sort of happened. She had been the one to initiate a new relationship with Jasper before her official divorce. And it had a better chance of Charlie not behaving rashly in her defense. Bella felt Jasper's amusement from the other room. Apparently he liked her revised version of history.

"Then why haven't you come home? Are you and Jake -"

"No! No, Jacob and I are still just friends. I'm actually with Jasper now," Bella explained.

Charlie's face wrinkled as he seemed to be trying to keep up or place where he knew the name Jasper from. It was a lot of information to deliver at once. He'd thought his daughter was dead, but evidently she'd been going about her life and making a number of significant changes in the meantime.

The sound of an older car slowing as it turned onto the dirt drive made Bella smile. Sue's timely arrival was sure to help this all go down easier. Carlisle opened the door for her before she'd even knocked. No one mentioned how she surreptitiously surveyed the room, judging all the potential hazards of being in a vampire's home. Seth and Leah may not bat an eye at living with vampires - though it took Leah a while to get to that point - but Sue was a Quileute tribe leader through and through.

"How are you holding up?" Sue asked, smiling wryly and wrapping an arm around Charlie's waist.

"You already knew about all of this too," Charlie accused, picking up on her lack of surprise at the sight of Bella. At least he didn't look angry, just a smidge hurt.

"There's more, but I can tell you later tonight. Right now you should enjoy your reunion." Then she directed her next words at Jake. "You'll come around to help." It was a statement, not a request.

"Show-and-tell. You got it," Jacob said, almost eagerly.

"Ungh!" Charlie huffed, "You're involved in this too - like her?" he asked, pointing at Bella. Jasper chose that moment to make his appearance. The second Charlie saw him, he remembered the connection.

"Not the same way, but yeah, you could say I'm involved," Jacob chortled.

"Great," Charlie muttered, obviously overwhelmed, and not looking forward to learning more about how his best friend's son was embroiled in all of this. Instead, he refocused his attention on Jasper. "So you just decided to take up where your brother left off?"

"Bella and I are building a future together," he replied, filling the room with subtle acceptance, serenity, and happiness. Nice. They were going to roofie her father into being all right with this.

Jasper raised a brow at her disapproval, and she could almost imagine him asking, _Would you rather continue arguing, all the while letting Charlie's heart race out-of-control?_

Deciding it might be for the best, Bella said, "He was there for me when I needed someone. He makes me happy."

"Hmph. You do look good, Bells. But are you sure you want to go down this path again? No offense, Carlisle, but your family hasn't always been good for my daughter," Charlie stated bluntly.

"Jasper is nothing like Edward, dad," Bella insisted, not wanting Carlisle to have to be in the position of defending one son over the other. "He makes me more," she said simply. That was really the only way to describe how it was with him. Every aspect of herself, every feeling, was enhanced, at its full potential for the first time ever.

"So it's not all about him. Well, I guess that's something," Charlie grumbled, running a hand through his hair, and looking uncomfortable with all the revelations. She really must have come off as obsessed with Edward from her father's perspective. He'd feared she'd lost herself in him, and letting him lead her around blindly.

Another car turned onto their drive. This time Bella recognized the familiar purr of Rose's BMW.

"Excuse me," Jasper said softly, moving to intercept the newcomers so Bella had a chance to prepare Charlie. So much for not completely overwhelming him. No way he could see a teenage granddaughter after less than a year and not totally freak.

"Dad, I know this has already been a lot to digest," Bella began, hesitating before lightly touching the sleeve of his shirt. A shiver went through him, and Charlie's eyes went instantly to the spot while his brow wrinkled. Bella waited for him to shake it off. She wasn't really that cold to him, was she? "I've put you through a lot the last two years. But there's something else I have to tell you. I have a daughter - Renesmee. She's incredible and I can't wait for you to meet her," Bella said, her voice catching as she comprehended that this was really happening.

"I'll kill him," Charlie said, throwing her off. His next words clarified his assumption. "That's why you're not together anymore? He didn't want to take responsibility?"

"It wasn't exactly like that. I fell in love with Jasper, real love and not hero worship, and together we are raising our daughter," Bella said, almost pleading with him to be all right and happy about these latest developments - before Mae came in and heard him talking about her like she could ever be something unwanted or a mistake.

"Papa! Is he here?" Bella heard Mae ask. Charlie looked confused. That was not the way an infant should sound. Or a toddler. Or even a young child.

"Yes, poppet, he's right in there, but let's give momma a chance to introduce you properly," he said, adding in a whisper too low for Charlie to detect, "Don't use your gift on him just yet. We don't want to scare him."

"She's very special, but she's different," Bella said, not sure how else to describe her miraculous daughter.

"Like you?" Charlie asked, unsure what he was actually asking.

"Sort of," Bella hedged, shrugging and giving her dad an indulgent smile. "She's unique. Nothing you've ever seen before."

Mae continued talking to Jazz, saying, "I've heard so many stories about him from Uncle Billy."

Charlie scowled at hearing Billy mentioned. The calculating look he wore said that his friend would be getting an earful that night for keeping all this secret from him.

Jasper ushered her in then, walking a half step behind her with his hands on her shoulders. Charlie's bow-shaped lips parted immediately, not quite forming a perfect o with the way his jaw hung down so low. Mae ducked her head bashfully under the intense scrutiny, letting her long, copper hair fall forward to shield her face. Ordinarily she was very open with strangers, but Bella realized she was afraid her grandpa might not like her given the way he was staring. She'd have to explain later that it'd just been a shock.

As soon as Mae's face was hidden from view, Charlie slowly turned back to Bella, the color draining from his face to be replaced with an unspoken question demanding an answer. He'd seen Bella less than a year ago. But the resemblance between her and Mae made their relationship as mother and daughter clear. The math didn't add up.

Sue leaned in, but they all heard her anyway, "I'll explain how later."

Emmett snorted, and Bella glared menacingly at his evil smirk and the way he'd evidently taken the remark. Obviously Charlie already knew how babies were made. She was proof.

"Renesmee, this is your grandpa Charlie," Jazz said, saving Bella. Mae peaked shyly back up at him, and smiled wide enough to make the dimples in her cheeks appear.

"She's a beauty," Charlie breathed, looking back at his granddaughter.

"Thank you," Mae said, tinkling bells ringing with the words.

"Aren't I a little young to have a granddaughter so… advanced," Charlie sputtered, looking around helplessly. "How old is she?"

"Carlisle's her grandpa too," Emmett volunteered unhelpfully. Charlie looked a little nauseous and indignant at the thought of the ridiculously handsome and young doctor having a teenage granddaughter.

"She's thirteen, more or less," Bella offered. "No one else can know about her, or me. Tell me you understand. Not even mom. She wouldn't be able to handle this."

"Sure, Bells, yeah. I think you're right about Renee," Charlie agreed, continuing to stare at Mae.

"Momma and papa and Jacob took me to Central America. Would you like to hear about it?" Mae asked, wanting to get to know him.

"Mae," Jasper warned. She usually shared the trip by showing her pictures. Mae rolled her eyes at him just like a real teenager would. Oh, geez.

"We saw monkeys. Momma enjoyed them," she said, alluding to how Bella had drank one and giving Jasper a devilish smirk at the little hidden truth. Bella supposed this was her way of rebelling since she was upset with them about being forced to leave.

The next few hours were spent talking. They didn't come right out and tell Charlie that Bella had become a vampire. They figured Sue could manage that when the time was right. Mostly, though Charlie watched the game with Emmett. Although he was equally as engrossed in watching Bella and Jasper interact, or chatting with Mae. The more he watched, the more he seemed to relax. And it was obvious that he was every bit as enthralled with Mae as the rest of them. She truly was irresistible.

When the game ended, Emmett and Jake started playing Mario Kart, with Jasper playing winner. Bella laughed as Mae teased them, cheering for Jake, much to Emmett's disgruntlement. Charlie and Bella both opted out of playing themselves. When it was Jasper's turn to play Mae a little later, Bella covered his eyes, daring him to still try to win while blind. In the end, she'd swatted the controller out of his hand's entirely to make sure Mae won. He'd called foul, but let it go when she kissed him, settling for the compromise.

It was the most relaxed she'd been since returning home. The stress melting away, even if only temporarily. The day had felt like any other with her family. The way things were meant to be.

"You laughed more today than you have since moving to Forks," Charlie commented when he and Sue were preparing to leave.

"I have the life I always wanted," Bella said easily. It was the truth.

"He's better for you. I always thought it should be Jacob, but I see it now. It's him," Charlie said, speaking quietly, as if only for her and not knowing the whole house was listening as well. Hopefully Sue would remember to tell him about their hearing.

"Jasper's my mate."

"Soulmates? If today was any indication, you might be right," Charlie said thoughtfully, misunderstanding her term, but his worked equally well.

"Can I come back tomorrow?"

"Actually, Jasper, Mae and I are spending the day together. She and Jake are leaving the day after to go visit Alice. And Carlisle's family from Denali are staying with us - you met them at the wedding. They should be back any minute."

"How long will Mae and Jake be gone?" he asked suspiciously. "And why aren't you going with?"

"Some things are happening around here next week. They'll be back when it's over. We can spend more time together then."

"Should I be worried?" He always picked up on more than what she actually said. Must be the cop thing.

"Sue will fill you in on as much as you can handle," Bella promised, impulsively hugging her dad.

"I just got you back, kid. You can't disappear again," he said gruffly, awkwardly patting her stone back and shivering a bit at the contact.

"I'll do my best." It was the most she could say.

* * *

8 Days

Mae was leaving in less than twenty four hours to meet Alice, so Bella was surprised to hear from her sister right now. She answered the phone anyways.

"Bella, we found him. The hybrid Zafrina knew from before. He's still alive," Alice chirped rapidly, speaking so fast and so excitedly into the phone it took Bella a moment to separate the words and assign actual meaning to them.

The shock was enough to draw Jasper to her side. He, Sam, Leah, Garrett, Emmett, Carlisle, Kate, and Eleazar were going over the final plans for how the battle would ideally play out. Each would tell the others not here what they needed to know.

Bella met Jasper's eyes, knowing he was listening, as on edge as her. His hand trembled as he brought it up to cup her face.

"How old -"

"Over a hundred. I haven't seen him myself yet. Seth just told me, and I had to let you know at once," Alice rambled, her excitement a tangible thing.

"Alice, do you know what this means?" Bella whispered, having to force the words through her constricted throat even as she felt her eyes burning with unshed tears that didn't disrupt her view of Jasper in the slightest.

"That my niece is going to be around for a very long time," Alice supplied. "I'm going to meet him myself now. Bye, Bella."

Jasper was dialing on his phone, without ever breaking their eye contact. Bella realized he was sharing the news with Jacob as he repeated Alice's words. The two had become friends on the trip, and they'd bonded even more after Jake protected Mae and Bella. She had a suspicion that Jake had even confessed the contents of his fight with Sam to Jasper. At least this was some good news after the crappy days, plural, Jake had had recently.

* * *

7 Days

Letting Jake take Mae away was the hardest thing she'd ever done. She had a feeling even if she lived for millenia, it would forever remain the hardest. Jasper and Edward had come to the airport to say goodbye with her. They didn't want to cause a scene, so the others had already said their farewells at the house.

"Will you tell me what Sam said that hurt you so much?" Bella asked Jake, slightly jealous that he'd confided in Jazz and not her. They were supposed to be best friends.

He glanced around, noticed Mae watching him, and shook his head. "Bella, I've given so much to you and your family. Please don't ask for this as well. I can't… I just, I can't."

"All right, Jake," Bella said, taken aback.

"I got in to UC San Diego - the engineering school. The letter was waiting for me when we got back. My dad saved it for me," he offered instead, trying to soothe the sting with a different piece of news about his life.

Bella thought about it for a moment. It was great news. Jacob had just confessed to wanting to go to college. She hadn't realized he'd probably already applied when he'd told her that. He must have, considering they'd been traveling since and he hadn't had time to. And San Diego. That was right on the ocean. Down south.

"Southern California? It's really sunny there," Bella said, going for nonchalance. Judging by his expression, she failed. Miserably.

"Yeah. They have one of the best programs in the country. Look, we can talk about this when we get back. Nothing's decided, and I'm sure you'll want to weigh in once you've taken care of things here," he said, implying she'd be fine and able to voice her opinion - not that he had any intention of listening to it. He never did. Same way she never listened to him.

It was almost time. She'd already said bye to Mae, and was letting Jasper and Edward take their turns doing the same.

"There's no one else I would trust her with," Bella repeated from when she'd asked this of him in the first place.

"Aren't you really trusting her with Alice? I'm just the muscle and delivery man," Jacob joked, though forced and somewhat uncomfortable.

"So much for sentimentality," Bella said dryly.

"It wasn't a good look on you anyways, Bells," he quipped, mock punching her shoulder, and playfully shaking his hand out after. Or maybe it really had hurt and she was just so tough she hadn't properly gauged the force he'd used. "But seriously, you know I'll keep her safe."

"Promise me you'll still be here when I get back," Mae demanded of Edward, interrupting her moment with Jake. Bella looked over to see how he'd take it. They really hadn't had much time together, and now they were being parted.

"I promise, Renesmee," he said, hugging her tightly and breathing in the sweet scent of her hair. Bella had figured out that even though he fully accepted Jasper's new role in their family, he would never use his brother's nickname for the daughter they were sharing.

"Do me a favor?" Bella asked.

Anything," Jacob said, tone much more serious than it had been earlier.

"Check out this guy, Nahuel. Tell me what he's like," Bella said.

"Because Alice doesn't like him even though Seth does?" Jacob questioned, cocking his head as he studied her. "You know it's just because she's upset that she can't see him _and_ that he made her spend so much time looking because of it," Jake reasoned. She had a feeling he was correct, but she trusted Jake's judgement and knew he'd tell her straight.

"Yeah, that's what I figured, but check him out for me anyways," Bella agreed. She hated letting her daughter meet a stranger she hadn't gotten a chance to scope out yet. Guess this was practice for the rest of her life. It was bound to happen eventually.

"Will do," Jake promised.

Bella squeezed Mae tightly to her one last time.

Only the knowledge that if she didn't release her, Mae and Jake would miss their flight was enough to get Bella to let go and watch them move to the security checkpoint.

She'd only needed to remind herself fifty times that this was necessary to ensure her daughter's safety.

Jasper was her strength the rest of the day, and the following one. She'd have been a lifeless shell without him.


	23. 23: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

This is the last chapter before the battle then each of the three main characters gets a wrap up epilogue chapter, so four more chapters total!

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 23 - Alice

8 Days practically only a week

Seth took her to where the Amazons were waiting with the hybrid, and apparently his aunt, as soon as she got off the phone with Bella. Alice felt so much lighter, buoyant even, so much more herself now that one problem was solved. And in just over a week so would the other.

She noted the Amazons first. They seemed over any initial surprise, if they'd ever even felt any, which Alice seriously doubted. They faded into the background when Seth and Alice approached, blending into their beloved forest surroundings.

Then she saw the small, olive-toned woman, looking from the Amazons to her with distrust and suspicion.

Was the problem that they were strangers, or vampires? Seth wasn't receiving the same weary glances, so it must be the vampire thing. Odd, considering she was one herself. There must be a story there.

Nearby, shifting awkwardly, fidgeting in a distinctly unvampire way, was the hybrid. He looked like a less defined version of the Quileutes with his long, glossy black braid and teak eyes. Except his skin was a richer, deeper brown that faintly glimmered. He was beautiful, intriguing, and somehow visibly damaged. Not in a physical way, but Alice sensed emotional scars that ran deep and projected a sense of vulnerability. They mirrored ones she'd once possessed.

"Will you tell us your story? I'd very much like to hear it," Alice requested, approaching him cautiously.

"Yes, they said you'd be interested to hear it," he said, motioning towards the Amazons. "My name is Nahuel. Joham thought my mother, Pire, beautiful. He visited her until she became pregnant with me even though his visits hurt her. Then she and my aunt Huilen ran away." At that point he paused, looking to his aunt. She was frowning, lingering anger over the memory visible.

"I would have killed him,"Huilen said, and Alice thought she was referring to Joham. Good luck with that. But then she continued, adding, "But my sister loved him even as he hurt her from the inside." Alice stared at her in amazement. Huilen had been referring to Nahuel. And not once as she spoke, diid she seem to spare a thought to how her words must have hurt her nephew. Nor did she acknowledge his flinch when she mentioned once wanting him dead.

"It was the same for Bella," Seth shared, building a bridge to connect with the strangers, though he was frowning at Huilen. He didn't care for her, Alice could tell.

"He killed her, and bit me. The pain was so great I left him," Huilen responded, adding more to their story. A picture was starting to form in Alice's mind. One that was less than ideal. And there was a familiarity in the way she shared the information that indicated she reminded Nahuel often of his first actions in life.

"He's venomous?" Alice asked, realizing exactly what Huilen had just said and what it implied.

"You are?" Seth demanded, incredulous.

"Yes. Once I was born and fed, I followed after her. She smelled of my mother, and I was scared and alone. We have been together since," Nahuel concluded, seeming to leave quite a bit out of the story.

Alice could relate to the pain of waking alone, abandoned. The fear and confusion. Typically, she shied away from the painful memory. It was not something she liked to think about. It was much better to just move on and live her life. To find happiness and hope. Nahuel was apparently her opposite. He was obviously dwelling on the past - Huilen's presence a contrast reminder. How could he stand it? What damage must that inflict on his psyche?

"How old are you?" Alice asked.

"Over a hundred and fifty," Nahuel answered.

"How long before," Seth asked, waving a hand in a line tracing him from head to foot, before finishing, "this?"

"Seven years until I was full grown and stopped aging," Nahuel answered, glancing at Huilen like he wanted to add more or have her verify this, but she was busy covertly assessing the Amazons, sizing them up and looking ready to bolt if they continued their rapid, jerky movements.

"What happened to your father?" Alice asked, confused why he was with Huilen when she showed no indication of affection or protectiveness for Nahuel.

"Joham? He is with my sisters," he confessed, shocking Alice, and Seth too if his gasp was anything to judge by.

"There are others?" Alice demanded, stepping closer.

"Yes, three now. He plans to create others," Nahuel said, further startling her. More? But how?

"Guess it's not as hard for him as it was for Edward," Alice mused aloud.

"Edward?" Nahuel questioned.

"My brother. He's father to my niece, Renesmee. That's why we came to find you. We hoped to find answers about her," Alice explained, grateful Seth was letting her take the lead and determine how much information to share about her family.

"So your brother is a predator like Joham, seducing innocent women?" Huilen accused, her lips twisting in disgust.

"No, they were married first, and they're still friendly now," Seth interjected, trying to defuse her anger born of a mistaken idea.

"Her mother survived the birth? How?" Nahuel practically begged, eyes alighting at the news the way ones did when witnessing a miracle. It was slightly unnerving.

"We changed her directly after giving birth," Alice said, suddenly uneasy with the keen interest from the boy. Just the mention of Bella's survival had subtly altered him. He was more intense, more focused. Less cowed by his aunt.

"Is she gifted?" he quirred.

"Yes," Alice said, declining to elaborate. She caught Seth looking at her out of the corner of her eye, but he didn't say anything.

"Is that how she lived? Or was it something else?" Nahuel inquired, leaning towards Alice hopefully.

"No. We were just prepared to help her," Alice said, deliberately keeping her answer vague.

"I didn't think it was possible. I remember. The instinct to escape was unavoidable, and Pire was gone before I even fully emerged," Nahuel whispered, shaking his head in disbelief.

"You remember being born?" Seth said, voice filled with sympathy. He remembered how violent Mae's birth had been.

"It was terrifying. And I was so thirsty and alone," Nahuel added, fingers touching his throat at the memory. His eyes had gone distant, directed to the past. Haunted by the memory and the ever-present ghost of his mother.

"Until you found Huilen?" Seth asked, trying to brighten his mood. Alice didn't necessarily believe finding his aunt actually had been a blessing for the hybrid, not after witnessing their interactions thus far.

Nahuel nodded absently, noting, "It was four days before she stopped screaming and woke."

"I thought the change took three days normally," Seth asked uncertainly. "I know Bella's was special."

"Not enough venom. It would have taken longer to circulate and reach all of her tissue," Alice explained, imagining just how little the tiny infant bite likely produced, and how much worse it probably was for Huilen burning longer than necessary.

"How was Bella's special?" Nahuel asked insistently.

"We used extra venom so it went faster," Alice explained.

"Which parent does Renesmee favor?" Nahuel asked, glancing over Alice and Seth each as if that would help him envision what her niece looked like. None of them were bloor related though so it wouldn't do him much good.

"Why?" Alice fired off.

"My sister's and I all favor our mother's. I was curious if it was always the same, or just Joham's offspring," Nahuel explained, and Alice felt guilty for suspecting him of ulterior motives.

"Mae - that's what we call Renesmee - looks like both Edward and Bella," Seth answered. "She's already seven months old."

"It only took my sister's six year to reach maturity. I expect she is maturing similarly?"

"Yeah. She's already practically a teenager," Alice grumbled. They hadn't gotten enough time with her as a little kid before she'd grown up on them.

"Are Renesmee and Bella close?"

"Very," Alice replied.

Seth and Nahuel settled into conversation then, only slightly strained. Occasional Alice would ask a question she remembered someone asking at some point regarding hybrid development, but mostly she just watched Nahuel and Huilen. The small woman didn't say anything else, just stood nearby, disapproval evident.

"So... you were strange with him," Seth said on their way back to camp.

"I don't like him," Alice admitted.

"Just because you can't see him?" Seth asked, almost chiding her for being so unwilling to give the man the benefit of the doubt.

"Maybe," Alice allowed, not sure what else to say.

"He's not had it easy. That stuff about his family, and how his mom died. I feel sorry for him," Seth said.

"There is that," Alice nodded, their campsite coming into view. Switching topics, she said, "Thank you so much for your help finding him - he had all the answers we were hoping for," to Zafrina when they fully entered the area they'd been staying in.

"Please tell Carlisle we would welcome a visit from him or his family anytime," Zafrina said in response, moving rapidly over to her two companions.

The sentiment was strange, not at all the usual teasing remarks she'd begun making after finding Alice curled up against Seth while he slept one night. The visions had gotten bad, and she'd ached for a momentary reprieve, but she'd been caught like a kid with her hand in a cookie jar.

Then it struck her. It wasn't an odd thing to say. Not if you were saying your goodbyes. She hadn't seen because she'd been with Seth and Nahuel all day. They'd left shortly after she'd begun talking to Nahuel and Huilen, because Huilen wouldn't stop glaring at them. There was also the fact that they tended to live very much in the present, only making decisions when it became necessary to do so. Which meant, unfortunately for her, that they were largely exempt from her gift.

"You're leaving?" she asked a touch mournfully.

"We miss the wild rainforests of our home farther north. You do not need us here any longer, so we wish to return," Zafrina said, verbalizing all three's sentiments.

"But Mae is coming soon, and Seth is leaving," Alice tried, hoping to change their minds.

She'd come to enjoy their unusual relationship. They were so different from the hordes of high schoolers she was usually surrounded by. Different even than her family and extended family of vampires. They saw the world exactly as it was, without all the excess that humanity continued inventing to alter it.

"Did you not hear? Your young one will live a very long life. There will be time to meet her one day when you bring her for a visit. And you will visit?" Zafrina said lightly, yet somehow Alice thought it just might be prudent for them to make sure they did. Zafrina was not one she'd ever want to cross.

The idea of Zafrina making Alice see whatever she wanted… Well, it was too much like false visions. Zafrina's gift was one Alice didn't think she could best if it ever came to a fight. Guess it was a good thing they were friends.

"I'll miss you," Alice said, nodding agreement to the 'request' that they visit.

"We will miss you as well. Perhaps we would not shun others if more were like yourself," Zafrina said.

Ordinarily, Alice would have used the moment to make a quip about everyone wishing they could be as wonderfully unique as her, but this was not the right audience for her humor. They wouldn't be able to fully appreciate it. Such a shame.

"Safe travels," she said instead.

Zafrina and Kachiri nodded, then quickly spun to leave, swiftly departing.

"Goodbye, wolf," Senna said in highly accented English, the sounds so thick her tongue seemed to stick to the roof of her mouth making it impossible to articulate the words. That hardly mattered to Seth though.

"Yeah!" he whooped, grinning like a fool at finally succeeding in getting her to speak to him. Even if it was just to bid farewell, and possibly good riddance to the boy that had pestered her for so long. "I knew you liked me."

Senna stared at him blankly, not revealing a hint of her true emotions.

"You're pushing it," Alice said lightly, rolling her eyes and sticking her tongue out at him playfully.

"You know you'll miss me," Seth added anyway. Alice barely caught it, but Senna's lips quirked just the slightest bit before she turned and followed after her sisters, disappearing.

* * *

5 Days and counting

"I can't believe how old you've gotten. I mean I saw it in Jake's head, but seriously girl - slow down," Seth teased, hand on the top of Mae's head. She came up to his chest. And he was tall.

"I have - I swear!" Mae trilled, excited to see her auntie Alice and Seth after so long apart.

Probably thrilled to be out of the plane too. It took nearly nineteen hours to get from Seattle to Santiago, Chile. And it would take another twenty-four hours for Alice to drive them south to where Nahuel was. A normal person would need an additional twelve hours to make the trip, but Alice didn't bother paying attention to traffic laws. What was the point of going so slow? Even in the mountains.

"Geez, Alice, she's taller than you," Seth mocked, ruffling Mae's disarrayed curls. Jacob apparently hadn't made her brush the waist length tangle since they left Washington.

"I noticed. Thank you though for being rude enough to point it out," Alice said primly. There was no need to point out she'd never reached five feet herself.

Mae insisted on sharing all of her adventures with Seth since he was leaving soon, and interrogating him about the Amazons. She wanted to meet Zafrina so they could exchange pictures. Alice promised that Bella and Jasper would bring her back soon.

"I wish I could spend some more time with you," Seth said, adding, "but we were lucky to even get a couple hours between when your plane landed and mine departed."

They'd planned that deliberately. Alice and Seth had flown from the Punta Arenas airport to meet Jake and Mae in Santiago. It was the only way they could get a layover together and still end up where they needed to in time for the fight. But Alice was driving the three of them back down in case they wanted to see anything along the way. They had a couple days to kill, so why not. Besides, Alice needed the distractions and stimulations.

She was worried about her family. More than that, though, she'd miss Seth.

"I'll see you soon, pixie. I'm looking forward to that talk," Seth said, looking down at her with tender longing. The depth of his feelings staggered her. It was the most he'd revealed this entire trip apart from when Zafrina showed him whatever images she had and he'd stared at her directly after.

"Seth -" Alice breathed, his name a sigh. But then exclaimed, "Ohh." Alice gasped when Seth's arms formed bands around her hips and butt as he hauled her up against his chest.

His head descended towards her. He moved at a human pace, allowing her enough time to turn her head if she really wanted. She didn't. He sensed her submission and went for it, kissing her full on the mouth.

He was so hot he burned. Scorching flames that glimmered, begging to be touched. She melted against him, her stone body softening and conforming to his. Without thought, her arms wrapped around his shoulders, anchoring her against him. A steady port in a wild storm.

No hesitation. No fumbling. His lips pressed insistently against her own, coaxing them to open for him. There was no venom in her mouth. Once more it vanished the instant desire sparked, burning it away.

She didn't feel like stone in his arms. He was strong enough that her flesh seemed human against his hands and lips. Her tongue slid over his in an intimate caress.

The taste of him was dark and exhilarating. Hints of deluxe chocolate and cabernet wine. A promise of something hidden and mysterious, sensual.

It was the first time she could remember being kissed and being solidly there, every sensation felt. Sandalwood and the musky forest engulfed her. His skin sizzled against her own, fueling passions she'd never known she was capable of feeling. There were no visions. No possibilities. No insistent glimpses of the future demanding her attention.

There was only Seth.

Soaring, flying through the air on a zipline strung over a canyon. The sheer magnitude of what she was feeling left her dizzy and lightheaded like she'd consumed too much champagne - not that she knew what that felt like, but she'd seen movies and could guess.

A wolf whistle cut through the moment, and Seth slowly broke the kiss, brushing her lips with his twice more before fully separating them.

"Don't hit me or anything for taking liberties," he said, breathless like he'd just run a marathon against a vampire.

Bemused, Alice said, "Feel free."

Was that how it was supposed to be with the right person? Could she really have that?

Seth bent to place her back on her feet, though his hands lingered on her hips, squeezing gently, as he grinned triumphantly at her.

Mae was jumping around excitedly while Jake looked slightly uncomfortable, like he'd just walked in on Paul and Rachel having sex. It had been a little indecent for a public place. The adjective steamy came to mind.

"I'll see you in a week," Seth promised, nodding at Jake and walking off before she could say anything that might ruin the moment.

* * *

3 Days can this just be over already?

Mae took one look at Nahuel and flushed. Alice didn't like it. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she didn't much care for Nahuel. He was nice enough, but he was a little too eager to meet Mae and a little too interested in Bella. It didn't sit right. Seth thought she was crazy.

He was probably right. Misplaced aggression for not being with her family right now. It wouldn't be the first time she'd done that. But still.

"It's very nice to meet you, Renesmee," Nahuel said, bending his head in greeting.

"You're really like me?" Mae asked, so hopeful that Alice felt immediately guilty for her previous unkind thoughts. "I'm not alone anymore."

Alice caught Jake's face flicker at her words, but he didn't say a word, just continued scanning the area as if he expected a threat to jump out at any moment. Or like he was trying to give Mae the illusion of privacy.

"No, you're not," Nahuel acknowledged, then added, "I have three sisters too. Though they are not as approachable as I am."

"So you've always known others like us," Mae said sadly, a smidge envious.

"Not always. My aunt Huilen raised me," he said, gesturing to the silent woman nearby. Huilen didn't speak much the last time they'd visited either. Seth suggested that she resented Nahuel for his part in his mother's death. He thought the whole situation was horribly tragic. "She's a vampire like your family. So I went many years before I met my half-sisters. You're the first like me I've met that was not sired by Joham," he continued, offering her a way to connect with him. It was a similarity Alice had overlooked when they met a few days earlier.

"Joham is your father?" Mae asked, wanting clarification on the word sire. It must sound like a strange way to refer to a father in her mind.

"Yes. He left when my mother was pregnant, and only came back much later," he shared, revealing personal details of his life as freely as a comedian offered laughs. Talk about overshare. Seriously! They _just_ met not five minutes ago.

"Mine did too!" Mae cried, bouncing up on her toes excitedly, not because Edward abandoned her, but because it was yet another thing they had in common. "But I had momma and papa," Mae added as an afterthought.

"Alice told me your mother survived your birth. I find it so hard to believe," Nahuel said, zeroing in on the mention of Bella.

"Momma's strong. The strongest," Mae said like it was simply a fact. To her it probably was. She had so many memories of Bella defeating Emmett, the largest vampire she knew, multiple times during Bella's first few weeks as a vampire when her newborn strength gave her an edge. "She fought for me, and she fought to live."

"You are very lucky," Nahuel said, sadness and longing clear on his face.

"I am," Mae agreed.

"Is this the first time you've visited my country?" Nahuel asked, though he knew it was.

"Yes. It's beautiful," Mae replied, glancing around. They'd stopped to see the towering, snow capped peak of Osorno and the jagged, irregular spikes of Fitz Roy, though only from a distance, on the way south.

"Have you ever seen an iceberg?" Nahuel asked, and when Mae shook her head no, invited, "Would you like to?"

The five of them spent the rest of the day together. If Alice didn't miss Seth so much, it actually would have been quite enjoyable. Although after the third time Nahuel brought up Bella, Alice changed the subject to what each of their preferred foods was. Aside from that, it went well, and Mae was ecstatic.

The loneliness and absentee fathers was just the beginning of their bonding. By the end of the day they'd also bonded over preferring blood to human food, an appreciation for foreign languages, which Alice hadn't even known about Mae liking, and the annoyance of needing sleep when surrounded with those that didn't. She was less than a year old and already they had much in common.

Alice had convinced Jake on the way that they should return north after Mae had a chance to meet Nahuel, so they'd be near the airport and could return immediately if things went well. He'd added that it would make it easier to run if they went the other way. He didn't want them staying in South America if the Cullens lost. It would be too easy for Aro to find out and come looking for them. Alice had agreed, though it hurt to consider the possibility of needing to run because her family was dead.

When it was time to say goodbye, Mae asked, "Are you coming with us?"

"Huilen doesn't like to travel much, so we stick to this region or the Mapuche territory that we're from mostly," Nahuel said apologetically.

"If you ever decide to visit Washington, or wherever my family is, I can show you around," Mae offered.

"I'd enjoy that very much, Renesmee. Though it may take a few years for me to convince Huilen to join me, and I would not like to leave her behind all alone," Nahuel said, conditionally accepting the offer. Mae beamed in anticipation of a future reunion.

They'd settled in at the camp Alice and Seth had been using a little while later. First thing in the morning, they'd head for the car and make the long drive back to Santiago.

"Well? You noticed it too, right?" Alice asked, eager for at least one of the wolves to be on her side and dislike Nahuel.

"You really don't like him?" Jake asked, disbelievingly.

"You do?" Alice demanded.

How did he not see what she did? Alice had finally figured out what she didn't like. Two things really. The first was his self-hatred. Alice recognized it from those moments after she first woke and when she'd first met Jasper. But they'd put it behind them and moved on. Nahuel obviously hadn't. And his fixation with Bella made her think Nahuel was under some mistaken impression that she could help him.

The second was that Nahuel liked the idea that Mae wasn't his sister, but was like him. Alice just knew he'd want to try being with her niece one day. But he was all wrong for her. Mae would get bored with someone that remote and tied up in the past. He'd never even seen a cellphone before Seth showed him the other day. Alice could just imagine what he'd do with a computer, and that was assuming he could get past his baggage with his family.

"He's nice - a little sheltered, yeah. But harmless," Jacob said, shrugging and poking at the fire he'd built with a stick.

"Hmm," Alice hummed non committedly.

"You're going to have to come up with a better reason than that if you want me to think less of him. Right now he's the only friendly hybrid out there that can help Nessie if she ever needs it as far as understanding what she is," Jacob said, pointing out how advantageous the budding friendship was for Mae.

"Oh, he's friendly," Alice muttered. Jacob hadn't always been this willfully blind. She remembered how he'd been before the imprint. So what changed?

"And that's a bad thing? She's not alone anymore. Nahuel is someone she can relate to. I want that for her," Jacob said thickly, repeating the words Mae had used.

"I didn't realize you were worried about that," Alice said carefully. There was something momentous happening right now, but without her sight, she was blind.

"Of course I am. I want her happy. I want her to get everything she can out of life - especially now that I know she's going to have a very long one," Jacob said, taking a deep breath. Almost as if it was the first one he'd taken in years.

Alice wished Jasper was here to help her understand Jacob. He was not the boy she'd met in Bella's house that day she'd thought her sister killed herself.

"So the future -"

"I knew this was about you not being able to see him with your gift," Jacob grinned. "You're just pissed that there's one more person that you're blind to, and can get one over on you," he laughed, slapping the ground several times as he did.

That wasn't it at all, but she didn't know what it was either - other than thinking Mae and Nahuel wouldn't suit. She just knew that she had a feeling there was something Jake was missing. One she couldn't explain or search for answers about. Maybe this would just have to be one of those times she let nature take its course, and let herself be surprised when the answers were revealed.

"Sure, mutt. But you don't have to rub it in," Alice grumbled, making Jacob chortle even more.

"Do you have relationships on the brain? Does this remind you too much of Seth?" he asked more seriously.

"No. Not every thought I have revolves around him," Alice hissed, baring her gritted teeth at him. He mock-shuttered, raising his hands in fake surrender at the weak threat.

"I'm shocked. After the kiss I saw," Jacob jibbed, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Jacob Black!"

"What? I was just going to say get a room next time," he said with faux innocence. "Preferably a private one."

"I didn't exactly plan it," Alice huffed, but felt her lips curling at the memory. Would it be as intense and consuming every time? She could easily become addicted if it was.

"Those are the best moments though," Jacob said, reminiscing, though she couldn't imagine over what. The two times he kissed Bella weren't exactly under the best circumstances, nor did they have particularly welcome, or painless, outcomes. Maybe it was memories he'd seen in the pack mind. "You're really going to give him a shot when we get back?"

"Yes," Alice admitted for the first time. "Will the pack be all right with it?" she wondered, thinking of Leah in particular. Seth and his sister were close. Alice didn't want to come between them.

"You're my favorite Cullen, so I know I'm fine with you making my brother happy," he said, surprising her. Though perhaps he still didn't view Bella or Mae as Cullens. And if they weren't, Jasper wasn't either. Fourth. Alice came in fourth with Jake. She could live with that.

"And Leah?" she asked, voicing her true concern.

"Leah's a lot of things, but she's not a hypocrite," Jake said evasively. His tone told Alice the topic was closed and she'd get nothing more from him. How intriguing…

* * *

2 Days soon

They'd face off the day after tomorrow. Alice was still trying to see the outcome. The fact that she couldn't didn't really matter just then. She had to do something. Even if it meant putting up with Jake teasing her about her there-and-gone expressions as he called it when she had her visions.

She'd had one the day before that kept replaying through her mind.

"_Felix, Demetri, a moment," Caius called, stopping the two from following everyone else out._

"_Yes, master," Felix greeted, not quite looking the white-blond ancient in the eyes._

"_I don't think killing Carlisle will send enough of a message. I want you to go ahead and destroy a few others. I don't care who," he said, smirking excitedly, basking in the chaos and upheaval he knew this would cause. Anything to alleviate his constant boredom._

"_Master? I'm not sure Marcus and Aro would agree - "_

"_I will see it done," Demetri interrupted Felix._

"_Very good."_

She'd let everyone at home know right away. Neither Jasper nor Edward had been surprised, but Carlisle and Eleazar had been quite dismayed to learn of the intended betrayal. It made the decision to fight seem that much more justified.

But the need to protect her family even drove her to check what would happen if she went to the Volturi and surrendered herself in exchange for Carlisle. There was just enough time to get there if she splurged on private jets.

_Alice was standing before the dais, boldly meeting Aro's greedy gaze. He was the only member of the ruling three present, and he was nearly salivating at having her so close, caught within his web of trickery and deceit. _

"_If I join you, will you stop your attack on the Cullens?"_

"_We will give them a fair trial. If they've done nothing wrong, then we will part in peace - friends once more," Aro agreed readily, nodding eagerly as if this was all he'd truly desired from the start._

"_Then we can do a trial run to see if I fit in," Alice said, her face carefully blank._

"_Excellent! Heidi, will you show Alice to her room? She will be with Corin," Aro announced, clapping his hands delightedly._

_He waited for some time after she'd left before he spoke again._

"_Corin?" Aro called, addressing a young woman with sandy blonde hair and a pert, slightly upturned nose who stepped forward at once upon being summoned. "Do not leave her side for any reason. Use your talents to become her new best friend. Am I clear?" _

_The woman nodded eagerly, happy for a new task from her master, and left, presumably to find her room - the room they were now to share._

"_Jane, dear, let your brother know to proceed as planned," Aro added, sitting back in his chair and lifting his head higher, a truly wicked smile on his face._

He'd lied. He'd said what he needed to gain her cooperation. And to use Corin against her like that? Edward had told her about Corin's gift. She produced a drug-like feeling of contentment. It was addictive, and could actually make a vampire sick if they went without it. Aro was going to drug her until she was forced to remain with him.

There was no way she could let herself get trapped like that for Aro's use. He'd abuse her power, and so many would suffer because of her ability. Carlisle would never want that.

But even if they won, what would stop the Volturi from attempting to retaliate for such a massive blow to their numbers? Even as she thought the question, the answer came to her.

_Edward was standing before Aro, Caius, and Marcus. Three metal cases were stacked beside him. Caius looked enraged, but Aro was speculative, calculating._

_Aro's hand extended, and Edward moved to place his in the waiting palm._

_They stood silently for several minutes, longer than usual. Aro's shoulders slumped forward under the onslaught of information. His expression flickered throughout the exchange, sometimes awed, others covetous, but mostly it was disappointed and resigned. Fear and something like genuine appreciation for a worthy opponent in a game well played passed over him too._

"_Yes," Aro finally said, he looked mostly disappointed now, but his words did not betray his true feelings. "I believe that is an arrangement that we can agree upon - if not exactly what I'd hoped for. This outcome will serve as justice."_

Alice waited, how had that been a possible future based on the parameters of what she'd been searching for? What was going on? What had the trigger been? Couldn't Edward have said something, anything, to give her some clues? How could she help if he left her blind?

What - and then she knew. At once Alice understood what the future would involve for her family. Little clicks sounded in her head as the pieces came together, fitting perfectly to form a new, completed picture.

She was dialing her brother even as the answer sorted itself in her mind, a clarity coming over her.

"Edward," Alice greeted her brother sadly when he answered her call.

"Alice?" The upward lilt to his voice let her know he'd detected her dismay and regret.

"What would you do to keep everyone safe?"

"Anything," Edward said at once, still seeking to make amends though he was already on better footing with everyone.

"I really hope you mean that, because you're not going to love what I think needs to happen."


	24. 24: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

This was actually the first chapter I wrote for this story - though I just got done editing it. I saw the whole thing play out in my head, and I frantically typed to get it all down, then the rest of the story leading up to this point slowly unfolded after the fact.

Just the three chapter epilogue after this :)

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 24 - Jasper

Everything was in place. Each individual was where he or she needed to be. They were spread in a long line stretching over half the length of the clearing, Bella and Jasper at the center. They had thirteen vampires. As well as eleven wolves, though only seven would actually be fighting today.

The Volturi were bringing seven members of the guard. A quarter of their number. Twenty against seven. Seven highly trained and skilled opponents.

Jasper had gone over it all a dozen times. More. He'd even sworn not to try and be everywhere this time. He'd trust that his family could take care of themselves - even Bella. She needed to see that he had confidence in her.

It was a good plan. One that actually stood a chance. Evened the odds a bit. Possibly even tipped them in their favor if it worked.

Though, in the end, it wouldn't matter. He knew that. The heat of the moment affected everyone differently. For some, everything fell into place. There was a calm in battle. A sense of peace and rightness. All the training and preparation kicked in. For others, emotions took over. Things happened that they did not want to. And then they lost focus, unable to complete their own assigned tasks because of the need for vengeance or to satiate personal aggressions.

All of the preparations were in place here. Now all they could do was wait and see how everyone did. At least a couple had military training and could be depended upon. Others were practically children or green as a sapling.

Alice had assured them the battle would commence on May 5th. They'd arrived early that morning, seven hours ago to be precise, but the Volturi had yet to make an appearance.

They'd all hunted yesterday. More than was physically comfortable even. Then last night he'd poured himself into Bella. With emotions, words and his body, he'd given her every last jagged, beautiful, broken, healed, ugly, hopeful piece of him.

Afterwards, she'd said, "If you ever say goodbye like that again, we're going to have issues."

He'd laughed at her understanding and frank assessment then said, "Darlin', I'm just trying to take advantage of having the house to ourselves. We won't get many opportunities for another five years."

Bella had laughed, lightly nipping his chest at the jest. "Well, in that case… "

Much later, she'd murmured, "She's going to live."

"A very long life," he'd agreed.

But that was before. The happiness had slowly ebbed from him and the other couples present.

Waiting was its own form of mental warfare. The longer they had to think about all of the negative outcomes that were possible, the more nervous and scared everyone became. Jasper's steady stream of peace and hope only seemed to be doing so much for the assembled group.

There was a barely susceptible shift in the air. A flock of distant birds took flight, their angry cries echoed, a warning signaling the presence of intruders in the forest.

Their enemies approached.

"Remember what we've practiced. Don't lose focus and let your emotions control you. Promise me, Bella," Jasper begged, knowing how easy it was for newborns to get caught up in the heat of their first battle and forget everything he'd taught them.

"I won't lose my head," Bella promised, fierce determination etched across her face.

"Bloodlust makes our kind reckless. No matter what you see. No matter what happens to any of the rest of us," Jasper continued.

Never had he felt more helpless. He could not protect her. He could not keep her safe. He had to trust that she could take care of herself, so he could focus on what he needed to do.

"I know. You need me to keep Alec distracted - no one can fight if I don't. I won't let you down," Bella swore, her tone was diamond coated steel.

"I know you won't, darlin'," Jasper acknowledged, projecting every ounce of faith he had in her outward so she felt it.

"Don't worry, Jazz. Seth will have my back," Bella reminded him, though he wouldn't be able to until the others could join the fight. Seth would not have been his first pick as support. Seth was too kindhearted. And he didn't want to put the man Alice was falling for in a position where he had to risk Seth's life to save Jasper's mate. If it went wrong, he would have played a role in dashing Alice's future happiness twice. Not a good way to repay her for saving him all those years ago. "Watch it or he'll know you would have preferred Jacob."

He would have. That was not something he'd deny. Jacob had more experience, and had more on the line when it came to Bella's safety.

But Jacob was protecting Mae, and that worked equally well for him. Possibly better even.

Jasper noted the others were sharing more sentimental goodbyes, rather than last minute strategy tips. Carlisle held Esme in much the same way Eleazar held Carmen. Emmett was in the process of devouring Rosalie. Guess he really was a soldier through and through. Bella chuckled at him, sensing his revelation, then she nodded to where Garrett and Kate stood.

"If we live through this, I'll follow you anywhere, woman," Garrett vowed, running his thumb over her lip, evidently having just kissed her.

"Now he tells me," Kate muttered, making Tanya chuckle lightly, and even Irina smiled slightly at her sister's potential happiness, though it was weak.

"I love you," Bella said simply. Just three little words, but Jasper felt the expanse of emotion they encompassed.

He took his cue from Emmett and caught her up in a hard kiss, squeezing her tight against him, wishing he could bury her inside himself to keep her safe. It was the rawest he'd ever been with her. An exposed nerve. If she were human her lips would be swollen and puffy when he released her. Likely would have bruised for days.

"Forever," he agreed, stepping back to recenter himself. Now was not the time.

Mist seeped into the area, spreading out like a shimmering mirage across the ground before they actually saw the Volturi guards. It oozed forward, a few inches thick and hovering just barely above the blades of grass it passed over. Some eighty feet away, it rose up to ease over an ancient decaying log. It spread across the entire length of the clearing, vanishing into the trees, but Jasper thought he could see the edge about two trees in. That was good.

The seven entered in a flying v formation with Alec at the head. Demetri and Afton flanked him, a step behind. Chelsea was beside Afton, a step further back, and Nadia was beside Demetri, a step back as well. Felix and Gaius with their large hulking forms were even farther back on either end, the main muscle. They walked in perfect synchrony. A single unit intent on destruction.

Jasper watched their eyes shifting, taking in the greater number of assembled vampires than they'd expected. Their forward momentum didn't falter, though it slowed ever so slightly. Mostly, they were undeterred by the show of force assembled to resist them. After all, why would it matter so long as they had Alec?

They were a hundred feet away. With each step, Alec's gift crept closer. It was less than thirty feet now.

Abruptly, they stopped. The change so sudden and jerky that Jasper knew it had been unintended. The difference was even more pronounced after the way they'd been before. Even Alec's gift halted in response to his shock. Jasper could hear the heavy thuds of Paul and Jared's hearts, feel the warmth emanating from either side of the core of their line. The two newcomers were joined by four more massive wolves farther back, waiting at the edge of the surrounding woods. They formed an almost semi-circle behind the Cullens and Denalis. All four of the young wolves were pawing the ground and snarling, teeth bared and fangs glistening with ropes of dangling saliva.

It was a menacing sight, and Jasper felt the Volturis' fear. Nothing in their expressions betrayed them, but emotions didn't lie. He knew the truth. Probably they'd all heard how their master had once almost lost a fight against a werewolf. Now they were facing six. Each one larger than the typical werewolf, and significantly more in control. If the most brutal of their leaders couldn't match one, what chance did they have?

Sam's hulking black form, the largest of all of his wolves present, remained out of sight. Forced to wait until Alec was fully engaged with Bella. It was imperative that he remain unaffected until the fighting commenced so the pack's weakness couldn't be used against Paul and Jared.

Jasper had been surprised a few days earlier to learn that there were two new additions to Sam's pack. The youngest barely eleven. Their reactions were even more undisciplined than the rest. Because they were nothing more than children. They must have phased because of the additions of the Denalis and Garrett while they'd been staying in Forks the last two weeks.

He and Sam had finally come to the agreement that all of his wolves would at least make an appearance, even if they weren't fighting. They needed the show of strength to intimidate the Volturi. To make them hesitate.

It worked.

He may currently despise Sam, but after sensing the innocence of their emotions, however, he was grateful that Sam had refused to let them participate in the main event today unless they were being directly attacked. And that they wouldn't allow themselves to be in a position to be attacked unless everyone else was already dead. Jasper didn't want children's deaths on his head. He was a father, and it reminded him too much of Mae being in danger.

The first part of the plan was executed seamlessly.

The hesitation was perfect. Between the time they'd come into the clearing to the time they'd paused, Jacob's, or in this case Leah's, pack had time to move into position.

For three seconds, nothing happened. Then Alec's debilitating mist started up again, progressing once more with the unstoppable force of a train.

The instant it did, Bella exploded forward, running directly at Alec. His eyes widened incredulously when her feet sunk right through the mist, continuing to propel her forward as she sprung off the ground. A hole was punched right through the vapor each place where her foot trod through it to meet the ground. Like stepping through a cloud - no effect on her whatsoever.

The members of the guard's heads whipped back and forth, looking from Alec to Bella in confusion. Their uncertainty gave Leah's wolves the opportunity they had been waiting for. Leah and Quil came at the guards from either side, behind the wall of paralyzing fog, while Seth and Embry attacked from behind.

Even when they'd stopped like hitting a brick wall at the sight of the wolves, they'd maintained their composure. They lost it now. The guard's perfect formation finally faltered, failing out of the sharp, precise, v it had been as the guards spun, unsure where to look. Probably for the first time ever. Over a millenia of punishing covens, and not one had ever stood a chance of fighting back. Until now.

If Jasper thought the guard's had been afraid before, it was nothing compared to what he felt from them now. Unabashed terror. Though the emotion was entwined with outrage and determination. Each one truly believed their cause here was just.

They moved, each going to face off with one of the wolves while Bella darted around Alec, making him spin, and disrupting the steady flow of his insentient vapor. Immediately, Jasper noticed it starting to dissipate, thinning near the top first, the way sunlight burned off fog first thing in the morning. And just like fog, the edges thinned the fastest. Already it barely touched the trees on either side.

Jasper watched the fight beginning, analyzing every move. He took it all in, watching everyone at once as he had when he'd lead the newborns for Maria. He'd been responsible for every one of them, every move they made. She'd expected him to oversee them while still fighting himself. He'd gotten very good at it. The same attempt was undertaken now, and like then he watched it all while still focusing on his own fight - even if right now he could only wait. Wait until he could join and destroy those who thought to attack his family. It'd be the last thing they ever did.

With only Bella and four wolves fighting these first few seconds, it was not an even match. Even if it had been one-on-one, it would not have been. The guards were simply too well trained.

Gaius and Nadia teamed up against Leah on one side, somehow sensing she was the most powerful, the leader, of the attacking wolves. Leah darted around them, using her speed to make them get in each other's way, not engaging. She was toying with them. Apparently she'd learned from her mistake with the newborns. If she could keep them off her for even thirteen more seconds, the mist would be passable.

Thirteen seconds. It was nothing.

It was an eternity.

Thirteen seconds. That's all it would take for the densest, central part to clear. But so much could happen in that length of time when vampires were involved.

Quil had launched himself at Felix and the two were wrestling across the clearing floor. Snapping jaws, clawing nails, fur and dirt flying - a blurred jumble as they grappled.

_Guide them away,_ Jasper instructed silently. After hearing how Alec's gift worked, he'd advised the wolves to push the guards outwards so he and his family could help them sooner. They could meet the threat at the edges while Jasper, Garrett, and Kate, along with Jared and Paul, waited to attack the central figures, freeing Embry and Seth to help Bella.

Embry, to the right of Bella, snarled at Afton, trying to nip at his feet. The vampire's red eyes and snow white hair made him look like an albino. The vampire seemed to flicker, shimmering in and out of focus. Eleazar hadn't known Afton from his time with the Volturi, and Edward hadn't mentioned a gift, but clearly he had one. Though Edward only knew as much as someone thought, so if no one thought about his gift while he'd been in Volterra...

Seth, meanwhile, to Bella's left, had his teeth clumped on Demetri's arm, just below the elbow. He was tugging at it, trying to break it off while also avoiding the tracker's kicking feet. This was the fight Jasper was most interested in assessing. Demetri would be his in nine seconds if the colying mirage continued disappearing at a constant rate.

Emmett moved to the edge, attempting to jump over the thinnest part, but he plummeted to the ground, unmoving and unseeing.

"_Emmett_!" Rose screamed as her mate fell. Jasper had warned him it probably extended upward, but Emmett was always impatient.

Even as Jasper considered moving through the woods to go around to the edge and try to help him, Emmett slowly moved. One foot was now just outside the dispersing mist, freed of the numbing anesthesia, and it twitched. Luckily, the enemy were all otherwise too occupied to worry about him. Nor were they fool enough to tread near enough to the dangerous cloud to reach the largest Cullen.

Chelsea was the lone Volturi guard not engaged in combat. She stood back, face scrunched in frustration as she scanned the amassed group. Looking for weak spots? She wouldn't find many to exploit with this group.

Their ties had already been strong. But add two weeks of bonding in preparation for this fight, and they'd become ironclad. Chelsea's gift was useless.

Five seconds.

The ellipse of vapor continued to thin. Ten feet thick at the center.

Though the mist had stopped shrinking inward from the treeline. There was only enough space for a single body to pass on each side, and was now only thinning from a half circle spreading from Alec to a narrow, elongated oval.

Carmen and Eleazar had gotten around the edge and engaged Gaius, coming at him from each side and herding him away from Leah., protecting the wolf that had become a member of their family in the last year.

They were so gentle, Jasper had doubted they'd be able to fight at all. It was amazing how inspiring the threat to family could be. The Volturi really should consider that motivating factor more from now on. But then the concept of family was beyond their comprehension.

Leah attacked Nadia in earnest once she was free to focus only on the female guard. Nadia was compact, solid muscle like a gymnast, with nondescript brown hair and a square jaw. Leah sprung, catching the former Russian's thick shoulder in her lethal jaws and tearing a chunk of muscle free.

"Mhmm," Leah whimpered in shock when Edward appeared at her side just in time to block the bone shattering jab the mousy brunette aimed at Leah's throat. She hadn't even had a chance to drop her 'dog bone' when it happened.

"Together?" Edward asked, not glancing at Leah, but moving to her side. Likely he listened to her internal response. His show of respect for her skill astonished Jasper. Perhaps Edward could learn, after all. It just took the right person to help him.

Meanwhile, Rosalie had reached Emmett's feet, and tugged him entirely free of the paralytic. His brother stood slowly, shaking off the effects of Alec's gift. He was more sluggish than normal, a bear waking from hibernation. Seeing how close Quil and Felix were though had him running headlong at Felix's back, Rose just behind him.

_Boom_! The sound of Emmett's body crashing into Felix's ricocheted through the area, seeming to bounce off the surrounding mountains. Lingering snow icing the tip of one even rumbled as it showered down the peak in a tiny avalanche.

Three seconds.

The ellipse was even thinner. Six feet thick at the center.

Tanya and Irina were able to get around to Chelsea. But Chelsea was fast. She ducked and dodge every hit and kick aimed at her. Paul hesitated, wanting to wait and go after Demetri as they'd initially planned. But Jasper wouldn't need help. He was too furious after seeing his family attacked. Demetri was all his.

"Help them. Go!" Jasper insisted, noting the way the wolf's head moved to monitor the fight. Then Paul was gone, rushing around to help them while Jared remained to aid Garrett and Kate as planned.

All the while, Alec's gift was beginning to stretch out from him again, but this time it only consisted of tiny tendrils spiraling out from him as he spun, trying to attack Bella. He didn't seem to believe that she was unaffected by it. He was determined to keep trying, and she was equally determined to put her training to use. Waiting, watching, learning her opponent. Preparing to strike at the right time. And successfully keeping him from hurting anyone else while she did.

His mate truly was incredible.

Then, with a sweep of Alec's right leg, Bella's feet were knocked from beneath her, landing her flat on her back. Jasper tensed, ready to spring - screw the very last traces of paralyzing vapor - but Bella flipped back up to her feet in a flash, and was immediately at it again.

Jasper advanced, moving as far forward as he could. In three seconds he could engage Demetri, leaving Seth free to assist Bella.

The others followed his lead, avoiding the numbing border, but edging closer.

Less than ten feet separated Jasper from Demetri. His target.

Demetri knew Alice's mind, he'd tasted its flavor when she visited Volterra to save Edward. As a result, he could track her. He could find Mae. Jasper would not let him live. Seth seemed to have the same idea, though it was doubtless Alice he was so intent on protecting. The tiny soothsayer would be safe after today - one way or another.

Demertri caught Jasper's eye, watching him even as Seth put up an ample fight. The tracker eased back, deliberately putting more space between them. A taunting grin sliced over his face, and Jasper's lips curled back at the challenge, baring his teeth.

One second.

"_Embry, look out!_" Bella screamed, noticing how close Afton had forced the wolf to the sweetly destructive cloud still enshrouding Alec.

Alec was grinning the same vicious smirk his sister always wore at having noted their proximity as well. He was just waiting to deal a death blow to the incapacitated wolf.

Afton's ability to turn invisible was making it exceedingly difficult for Embry to pin him down. He was forced to track something he couldn't see while attacking and avoiding the unseen vampire's well aimed blows all at the same time.

The confusion had Embry basically spinning in circles this whole time. A dog chasing its own tail - literally.

The grey and black wolf skittered back immediately at Bella's warning, scutting backwards like a crab or little kid afraid of spiders after almost stepping on one.

Right into an invisible kick that caved half of Embry's side in instantly.

"Waahhhhhhmm," Embry whimpered, collapsing.

Pain exploded outward, filling the clearing like a nuclear blast. Jasper cringed against it, bracing himself. The fallout rained down, dosing Seth, Leah, and Quil. All three howled in shared pain in the same instance. Their legs quivered, buckling under them.

"Carlisle!" Jasper screamed, launching himself forward as the final thread-thin line of smoke vanished. He'd already been racing forward as Afton landed the blow.

"I see," Carlisle replied, moving a step behind him, Esme with him.

Carlisle had promised Sam and Jacob that he would play doctor if needed for the wolves. Aside from that, he'd help where needed in the fight. Just like with the newborns, Carlisle would only fight if it came down to saving one of his family. He wouldn't fight to save himself. Jasper didn't want him attempting to attack the Volturi if it could be helped. Carlisle was a healer, not a fighter, and if he engaged in combat with them, it could be the very death sentence they were fighting to avoid happening, because Carlisle just wasn't capable of killing another.

And Esme was honestly more of a liability in a fight. She hesitated to strike. Every time. Even when it meant her own death. She was just too nurturing to inflict the violence necessary to win. Jasper had not told her that. But he'd said she'd be needed to guard Carlisle in the event he was needed, so he wasn't taken unawares while helping another. She'd been grateful for the excuse, though she hadn't admitted it.

Carlisle reached Embry's side, immediately kneeling to check him over while Esme stood at his back, warding off any who would think to approach the pair on the ground.

It was bad. Jasper could tell by the way Embry's breaths wheezed in and out, only barely making the broken, crushed side of his chest rise beneath the matted, blood-soaked fur. Jasper even detected part of three separate ribs sticking out of his chest entirely as he passed the downed wolf.

Whimpers and yips sounded from multiple directions. A symphony of misery. The pack's greatest strength was their unity. Right now, it was also their greatest weakness.

During the milliseconds it took for all of this to happen, Jacob's pack had already started moving again. But the movements were all wrong. Their limbs jerked like marionettes with puppeteers pulling their strings, urging them to resume fighting. Jasper could feel their pain, the difficulty to breath, the burn of oxygen deprivation. And the loss of free will to submit to the widening chasm it created. The dark abyss calling. A force greater than their own minds was controlling them - Jacob. Their alpha. The one they must obey no matter what. It had to be.

Jasper didn't stop running, amazed as he was, until he was standing before the advancing Demetri, sliding easily between him and the still struggling Seth.

"Go. Help Bella," Jasper ordered Seth, appreciating the discomfort the wolf was feeling, but needing him to stick to the plan.

Demetri shifted, watching the wolf skirt around him to Bella, but he did not attack as Jasper expected him to. Jasper had been banking on it, so he'd have the upper hand when he attacked the tracker. Quickly, he reevaluated his next move.

Looked like waiting was his best bet.

Kate, Garrett, and Jared had taken up where Embry left off with Afton. Electricity sizzled over Kate, sparking like a lightning storm. But they were having no better luck locating the vampire than Embry had. At least there were three of them to look out for each other.

The waging battle slowed now. Everyone reassessing. The Volturi were no longer racing to defeat opponents before their reinforcements could join. They were taking stock of how the odds had changed, and not in the Volturi's favor.

From the corner of his eye, Jasper watched as Carlisle's hand and the lower part of his arm reached into Embry's body, disappearing beneath the fur. Blood spilled, but aroma was that of the unappealing wolves' blood - liquid, but not food. Even the Volturi turned their noses up at it.

Alec started laughing. A deep, bellowing laugh that portrayed indefinable mirth. He was enjoying the pain he'd helped inflict.

"AHHH!" Bella roared, shaking spasms roiled through her as she clenched her fists and bared her teeth. It was a rage Jasper had never expected her capable of. It mimicked that of a newborn being denied blood after starving for a month.

"No! Reign it in, Bella," he begged. There was no way for him to reach her in time. Demertri was between them. Judging by the guard's calculating joy, he'd done it deliberately.

Excitement. Expectedness. For what? What did Demetri enjoy most? Tracking. He was like James. He wanted to watch because for once those targeted by the Volturi could run. Since Alec joined them, he hadn't gotten to hunt as often, and he was looking forward to having the chance today. He was looking forward to being able to carry out Caius's order to kill them all.

Demetri was enjoying watching the others fight, and wanted to continue watching. That was fine with Jasper. He could wait - not forever, his family needed help - but another few seconds. Just until the tracker was distracted. Lulled into the false idea that Jasper was too worried about the others to attack first. Because Jasper would not give Demetri the chance to track any of them ever again.

"Sam! _Nooooo!_" Edward screamed suddenly, momentarily abandoning Leah to try and intercept the new wolf bounding into the clearing, appearing out of nowhere. Edward, the fastest of them, wasn't fast enough.

Sam launched himself at the sadistic child, black fur pressed flat against him by the wind and speed of his attack.

The horse sized beast slammed to the ground, skidding to fall a few feet short of his intended target. Blank, unseeing eyes the size of saucers faced Jasper.

Shifting his eyes, he detected that Paul and Jared were down too. Vulnerable.

Sam had argued that as the strongest, he should be the one helping Bella. But after learning that what affected him, affected all of his wolves, it wasn't worth the risk of accidentally taking out Paul and Jared. But Sam had played right into that trap. Rage over his brother, his true, blood brother, and not just a pack brother, made him behave irrationally.

Kate immediately crouched over Jared, shielding him. Afton would be shocked if he tried to go through her to harm the wolf. Garrett, meanwhile, had his eyes closed, trying to listen for Afton's movements amidst all the others fighting. It was the only option.

Because everyone still was. Embry's injury had weakened his pack. And the Volturi had taken advantage to rebound and attack with renewed vigor, and now Sam's wolves were out altogether.

Quil seemed to be struggling the most. Luckily, Em and Rose were there to help him handle Felix. The tall, dark-haired enforcer had finally met his match.

"Irina, shake it off. It wasn't his fault! Don't do it," Edward called, while still fighting Nadia. She was a master of systema. One of the original creators of the fighting style, she was the newest member of the Volturi guard - less than a decade with them. Caius himself extended the offer after hearing stories of her legendary skills at fighting, and how she never lost a match.

Edward seemed to be struggling because he, like Jasper, was monitoring all of the other fights. But he didn't have Jasper's training. And reading minds was a lot more distracting as it was.

Leah played off him beautifully. Shaking off the pain of Embry's wounds to use the opening Edward gave her as they fought the hard-faced, skilled guard.

The warning shifted Jasper's attention though, and now he too was riveted on the unfolding scene.

Paul, the other wolf paralyzed by Sam's recklessness, was in trouble. Tanya continued to fight Chelsea, but Irina was standing off to the side, staring coldly down at the wolf. Possibly the same one that had killed her beloved Laurent. Chelsea's face was screwed, concentrating on Tanya until the strawberry blond stumbled, backing up with a perplexed expression.

Irina met Chelsea's eyes and deliberately turned her back on the senseless wolf, all but giving his head to Chelsea on a silver platter.

Irina. How could Jasper have forgotten about the one chinc in the armor of their alliance? The singular weak spot that Chelsea could exploit - Irina's continued hatred and distrust of the wolves. Her depression had been so extreme it had masked the depth of her ongoing loathing.

Now they were going to pay for the oversight.

"Tanya, stop her!" Carlisle begged, noticing the scene too after Edward's plea.

"They're our friends, Tanya. They're here helping us today. Think of Leah - he's as good as her brother. Don't let him die. Don't put her through that," Edward coaxed, even as he returned a jab at Nadia, and dodged her return volley of hits.

Conflict and uncertainty warred across Tanya's face, making her lapse into a stupor as Chelsea stalked closer, only three feet separating them.

A click of a lighter cut through the din of crunching rock and panting breaths, quick from exertion. Accompanying it was the smell of butane igniting. Time seemed to freeze as Chelsea carelessly tossed the open flame at Tanya.

But Tanya was propelled sideway, and it was Irina's arm that was hit instead. The appendage caught fire at once, the blaze spreading to consume every inch almost instantly, like spontaneous combustion. Irina's body was a human torch. She didn't even have time to scream before it was too late.

"AHHHHHH!" Tanya cried in disbelief, springing at Chelsea to rip and claw her to pieces. Rage making her crazed as she janked the woman's dark braids.

"NOOOOOO!" Kate echoed, abandoning Jared and Garrett to join her sister in the fight. She lept the distance separating them and grabbed the exposed coffee and cream skin of Chelsea's arm, unleashing the full magnitude of her gift.

"Katie, wait," Garrett pleaded, but she didn't stop, and he wouldn't leave Jared when the wolf was defenseless.

Bella's instant rage was gone as fast as it came when she saw what Seth was doing. Seth distracted the male witch twin, digging in the dirt so it went flying in Alec's face like a real dog while Bella pulled Sam free of the numbing mist, realizing it was their only shot to turn things back in their favor.

Chelsea shook like she was in an electric chair experiencing her death sentence. Right then she was. But Kate was not letting up anytime soon. This moment would last as long as she could possibly make it.

Not even a full minute had passed since Alec's gift was rendered null across the field, but so much had already happened.

Demetri's lips parted, startled at the sudden turn the battle had taken. Before he could blink, Jasper struck.

His fist landed squarely on Demetri's jaw, making him stumble three steps back. Demteri used his momentum to spin around, standing as he did to backhand Jasper. It barely made his head turn.

Demetri shuffled back, assuming a more traditional fighting stance than vampires typically went for, and gave Jasper a more critical once over. The scars along his neck, chest and arms were deliberately exposed in his v-neck t-shirt. Free advertisement for what the Volturi should expect from him.

A series of punches that were blocked or dodged followed, each trying to get one up on the other. Jasper aimed high and low, switching from right to left without pause every few hits, or turning to backhand Demetri after dodging a blow. They each landed a few hits. But the advances were inevitably short lived as the other rebounded. Lack of pain made traditional fighting less effective for most of their kind.

That was not true for Jasper. Each and every strike Jazz made was infused with pain and uncertainty. His gift helped him ensure every blow made the grandest impact possible. It was what had always made him so effective as a fighter. The reason he'd never lost. His hits could hurt, unlike those from most vampires. Unless they possessed a gift like his or Kate's. And the uncertainty created doubt. It threw his opponent off, made the person question their ability to win. Doubt lead to mistakes. Mistakes he could take advantage of.

Jasper threw a roundhouse kick, hard enough to split the stone surface of Demetri's cheek and make him grunt. Then the guard returned the favor. Both wounds were closed within a second leaving no evidence behind that they'd ever existed in the first place.

The other fights continued, though it appeared Kate had finally relinquished her hold on Chelsea, and the guard was now burning alongside Irina.

Demetri began alternating kicks and punches, directing more force behind each strike. But the hits were slower, and Jasper found them easier to duck or block. Occasionally getting lucky and being able to turn the momentum against Demetri. It also meant he could return fire with quick, brutal jabs wherever there were openings in Demetri's defense. He one making the dark tacker hiss and groan.

They were too evenly matched. Even with the aid of his gift. Already he was having to devote his entire focus to this fight alone, largely foregoing his monitoring of the others. The only way Jasper would win this, was if he did something unexpected.

The next time Demetri came at him, Jasper only partially lent back to avoid it. The blow caught Jasper hard in the shoulder, turning him and making him stagger two steps to recenter his gravity. Vampires were more fluid, found balance and movement to rely less on joints, and only a portion of their body was affected, but even they could be thrown off when fighting each other.

Slower than necessary, Jasper started to stand, not spinning back towards Demetri first.

The burn of venom as teeth sank into the back of his shoulder was familiar. Almost tolerable after so many times. Honestly, the pain wasn't that different from feeling the hit Embry took earlier. Jasper knew how to handle pain - not that he liked to, but he could.

Demetri had expected Jasper to react, and was truly shocked when he didn't. Instead, Jazz used the position to flip Demetri over Jasper's head. When Demetri landed, Jasper planted his foot on Demetri's neck, and kicked upward as hard as he could, severing his head at the neck. It didn't go all the way through, but Jasper knelt on his chest, going from kicking to kneeling all in the same singular motion.

"No," Demetri gasped, a begging plea, as Jazz gripped the partially severed head, Demetri's widened shocked eyes locking with his, and finished yanking it off.

He hardly noticed the remains as he lit them on fire, too worried about the others' efforts.

Emmett and Rose were helping Bella and Seth. Alec was no match for the four, particularly now that Bella had some training and backup. He looked to already be missing an arm. His siblings' placement at Bella's side indicated that Felix had been successfully dispatched.

That was Felix, Chelsea, and Demetri dispatched for sure. Only four remained - if that.

Quil, now that he was free, was helping Carmen and Eleazar destroy Gaius. Paul's grey form was there too. The dark, barrel chested former gladiator was surrounded. This was one arena he would not be victorious in.

Carlisle was still working on Embry, the wolf's pain radiating insistently, but Esme had sat and was holding the wolf's massive head in her lap. Jasper felt it, not even one sixtieth of a second later. The moment Embry died. The instant the pain fled and grief rushed in to replace it.

Even if he hadn't felt it, he'd have heard it in the mournful howls of Jake's pack. Each one of the three let loose a single echoing note. Underlying it all was Sam's sniffling whimpers, and the salty tang in the air of baseball-sized tears falling to form puddles in the ripped up earth below his bent muzzle.

There was nothing Jasper could do for the heartsick wolves right then. Right now, he needed to help the others finish their invisible opponent. He would not escape justice for Embry. The rest of the guard had vanished, gone in plumes of lavender smoke, or soon to go that way.

A tribute to Embry and Irina.

Edward, apparently having already dispatched Nadia, had moved to take on Afton moments before Embry died, but even his skill was struggling to pinpoint the vampire's precise location. Jasper felt his frustration.

Others dropped back to give the two brothers space. They'd not been having any luck anyway.

_Gode him, _Jasper thought. _We need to make him visible. He has to lose control. _ Edward's eyes and emotions conveyed his approval. Even with the recent changes to their relationship, they worked well together.

"Chelsea was his mate," Edward revealed. Well, that explained the rage he sensed coming from nearby. The Cullens were primarily jubilant with their success. The Denalis were mourning Irina, while the wolves mourned Embry.

"She's still burning. That smoldering pile over there is her," Jazz taunted, waving towards one of the six areas burning. They hadn't bothered trying to gather all the pieces together, but burnt the enemies' remains where they were. Everyone carried a lighter that day for that very purpose.

"What's left of her, you mean," Edward said, playing off him. His eyes were scanning the area to Jasper's left, trying to find where the thoughts were coming from.

"I'm not sure he even cares," Jasper said, looking to the left.

"Maybe he'll move on as easily as I did," Edward said, shrugging carelessly.

"Jazz! Duck," Bella shouted, and he did without question, feeling the air whoosh by above him. Of course! He should have known she'd be immune to the gift and able to see through Afton's gift.

"Grrr," Afton growled, furious that he'd missed. The anger seemed to make him momentarily lose control, and he briefly materialized just within Jasper's reach.

Jasper swiped out, catching Afton's wrist and spinning him to catch his other, both secure behind his back in a single move. Afton seemed to pop into existence fully as he did. Edward was there before he'd even glanced up, darting forward to twist the last remaining guard's head off.

He dropped it at his feet and pulled his own lighter out. Once the head caught fire, Jasper tossed the stone body into the flames atop it.

Then it was over.

Jared and Paul and phased back and were watching the remains burn as they stood like sentinels on either side of Sam. Jared was leaning on Quil though - he must have been hurt at some point that Jasper missed. Their alpha was laying on his belly, nose pressed into Embry's fur. Idly, Jasper wondered if they'd ever acknowledged their true relationship.

"No," Edward murmured, but he didn't look over at Jasper. It was his habit so people wouldn't harass him to share the private thoughts he heard.

_And now they'll never have the chance._

Edward nodded, and Jazz felt his brother's empathy for the missed opportunities, though it was more pronounced than he expected given how well Edward and Mae had gotten along in the week before she left.

Seth and Leah, both still in their wolf forms - likely so they could talk to Jacob - were with Embry's body as well, along with Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle was wiping the blood off his hand, but Esme was hunched forward, sobbing tearless cries as she stroked Embry's fur. He'd forgotten how close the two had grown while the rest of Esme's children had been gone. She lost a son here today. It was a loss she felt every bit as pronounced as it would be if it were Edward, Emmett or himself that had died.

Jasper continued searching the clearing. Garrett was on the ground by Irina's burnt, charred remains holding Kate and Tanya, both of whom looked hollowed out. Eleazar and Carmen were standing behind them in a tight embrace. Even as he watched, the husk of Irina's body crumbled to ash.

The grief emitted from the two groups was more than Jasper could process. A consuming depression that wanted to drown him. Subconsciously, he took several steps back, needing distance.

Rose and Emmett were keeping the pieces of Alec safe and separate. He watched as Rose surreptitiously looked around, then broke another piece off of the arm she was holding. It reminded Jasper of her vengeful streak, and he smiled a bit as he watched her. There'd be no protests from him over abusing Alec a bit.

Then he found her. Bella. His mate. She was already staring at him, waiting. She grinned, twirling Alec's foot around her finger by the shoelace a couple times, showing off her trophy. Her pride was magnificent. Not to mention well deserved.

As he knew she would, she sensed his discomfort being around so much grief. That, accompanied with the need to feel the other, compelled her.

"Em," Bella called, waiting for her brother to look up, she tossed the foot to him then flashed to Jasper's side.

Before she'd even stopped moving, he'd janked her into his arms and fastened his lips to hers. Every inch of her that he could touch, he did. She returned the caress, checking for herself that he was alive and unharmed - mostly. His hiss when she made contact with the fresh bite wound brought them crashing back to reality faster than a bucket of ice water.

"Who?" she demanded, lips curled back in a feral snarl. The high of battle still riding her hard.

"Demetri. Sorry, darlin', he's already dead," he explained, tone mock regretful. He knew she'd be feeling the urge to kill the one that harmed him. It was the natural instinct of vampires. Hopefully, by teasing, he'd be able to soothe and redirect her emotions. She did have better control than most.

Bella pulled back, glancing around. When her nostrils flared and she snapped her neck to look at a particular pile of ashes - the one he knew to be Demetri's, Jasper felt the protective rage drain away as quickly as it had appeared.

He could picture how differently things with Santiago would have gone if Mae had been the one harmed instead of Jake. Bella was a fierce one.

"I missed how you did it," Jasper said, slipping his arms around her waist and nodding to where Rose and Emmett were still standing guard over Alec.

"I karate chopped his neck," she said, utterly serious.

"That's it?"

"Newborn strength," she said, shrugging, and leaning into him more. "Well, we actually did this cool somersault thingy when he came at me. I planted my foot in his stomach and sort of roll-flipped him - guess you had to see it for yourself," she explained, nuzzling his neck. "Then when we were both standing again, I karate chopped him. His smoke vanished when his head came off, totally gone all at once, so I let Emmett and Seth play tug-of-war with the rest of him - Alec lost."

Jasper chuckled quietly, conscious of the losses suffered by those nearby. He tipped Bella's head back and kissed her again, wanting to taste her lips after hearing of the danger she'd just survived. Not just survived. Triumphed over.

"Let's bring our daughter home," she murmured against his lips.

"Yes," he agreed. The thought of Mae helped lift the grief stricken cloud hanging over him, the shroud imposed by those nearby, even from Bella since she had cared for Embry too.

_We're already on our way to the airport - Jacob watched the whole thing and just explained everything_. Jasper heard Alice say through Bella's phone, not bothering with hello when she answered.

"When?" Bella demanded.

_Tomorrow night_, Alice promised. _But, Bella? Jake doesn't look good. I don't think he's doing well._


	25. 25: Bella

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!

Bella's final chapter. Don't worry, you'll see more of her in Mae's story :)

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 25 - Bella

As soon as they reached the house, the Denalis announced their desire to leave. The pain of losing Irina was too fresh. They needed time to heal.

Leah shocked her by going to one of the vehicles, apparently intending to depart with them. Garrett, unsurprisingly, joined them as well, having meant it when he said he intended to spend the rest of his eternity by her side. Kate burrowed into his side the second he slid in beside her.

"We'll talk soon?" Leah asked Edward as she opened the door.

"I'll call you in the morning," he promised.

Jasper had told her in whispers about how Edward had fought beside Leah. Bella thought it showed tremendous progress on his part to trust someone he cared for to handle her own in a fight. Maybe there was hope for them.

When the sound of the two vehicles leaving the dirt drive as they turned onto the main road sounded, Bella asked, "Do they blame us? For getting them involved today."

"No. They know we would have done the same for them if necessary, taken the same risk," Edward answered.

"They'll need time to grieve. We probably won't see them for a while, but we'll be there if they want us," Carlisle added. He was stitching up Jared's leg. The wolf was missing a huge chunk of skin and muscle from his thigh. Bella thought she saw part of his bone before Carlisle set to work on it.

Jared's injury was the worst of the surviving wolves. Seth and Emmett had carried him back to the house since he couldn't walk. Seth was injured too, a broken arm - Demetri again, but it had set early in the fight. She wished she could kill him all over again - for Jazz. How dare he injury her mate. Carlisle had insisted on looking over Seth though once he was finished with Jared.

Sam and Paul had carried Embry's massive wolf body back to the reservation. They'd be holding a ceremony to honor him tomorrow night once Jake was home. Bella wished she could attend, to pay her respects. Once upon a time she and Embry had been friends too, and he'd become close with Mae as well. Or at least that Esme could, but Bella understood why Sam had refused. Vampires killed him, so they didn't want vampires there for his final moments - even if they were the good kind of bloodsuckers.

"How did it happen?" Bella asked, stepping a little closer to investigate the sutures her adoptive father was placing. It'd been so long since she'd required any herself.

"The invisible one got his claws in me when I was still coming out of the stupor from getting roofied," Jared said. He looked from the fresh blood oozing out of his wound to Bella. "You're not going to start lapping at my leg now that you really are the vampire girl, are you?"

"Don't worry - you're not that tempting," Bella said dryly, rolling her eyes.

Her throat was itchy, and hunting would help with the dry heat, but the wolf blood smelled about as far from food to her as paper did for humans. It was just too earthy. Like dirt or bark.

"You might always have a slight limp, and even with your healing, I think it will scar," Carlisle said, a soft smile on his lips at their banter. "A portion of your muscle was excised and I'm not sure how capable your kind is at regenerating tissue. It's something I'll have to look into more. You may be completely fine, or you may not."

"Kim will probably find it sexy," Jared said, making light of the situation by mentioning his imprint. The two had just moved in together last Bella heard. "I don't care if I limp. I'm just glad Seth got to me in time."

"You did?" Bella asked, snapping her head around to stare at Seth. So that's where he'd gone right after Em and Rose showed up to help her. He'd only been gone for twenty or so seconds, but it was right after Embry died. Bella had been surprised he could function at all when just experiencing Embry's injury had debilitated Seth enough for Demetri to break his arm.

"Don't thank me. Jake was the one that went alpha on me. I… that was… never mind. I think he scented him through Leah or something, and ordered me to get to you. I wouldn't have been up for anything on my own right then," Seth explained, nodding at Jared.

"Still, I'm alive because of you. Thank you, brother," Jasred said more seriously.

"Anytime," Seth said, flushing. Clearly he was uncomfortable with the gratitude.

"Jacob ordered you?" Bella asked, wanting clarification. She remembered how opposed Jake was to using his status to strip them of their free will. Glancing at Jasper revealed that he was unsurprised by this revelation. Had something that happened already let him know about this?

"Yeah," Seth breathed, shuttering. A shadow crossed over his face, and he struggled to form the right words, "Right and left. It was… "

"He was ordering Embry to live," Edward supplied, his eyes tortured at the memory. "I heard him. I could hardly believe… It was the only reason Embry lasted as long as he did."

The events that lead to Embry's injury unsettled Bella. She'd actually been warning Embry about Afton coming up behind him since his gift didn't work on her, but the wolf had thought she'd meant Alec's mist. If she'd been clearer, maybe…

It was too late for what ifs though.

"I wondered," Carlisle murmured softly, lost in contemplation. When he noted the others' interest, he elaborated, "His heart was shredded. He shouldn't have even lasted long enough for me to get to him. I tried to hold the pieces of his heart together. I could feel them mending. But between the blood loss and the extent of the damage, there was just no way. Not even with your accelerated healing."

"Jacob hoped it would work. That he could give him the time he needed," Edward said, directing the words to Jared's perplexed look. He must have been replying to some unspoken thought in the wolf's head.

"Poor Jake. This is going to eat him up," Seth muttered, running the fingers of his uninjured arm through his hair while Carlisle examined the other having finished with Jared. "And on top of everything else too."

"What else?" Bella demanded.

Seth looked caught. He opened his mouth, but didn't speak, glancing at Edward then Jasper to save him.

"It's not important," Edward interjected smoothly. "You did amazing today, Bella," he added, changing the subject.

"Nice try," Bella said dryly, crossing her arms.

"It actually was pretty awesome - the way you sent his head flying," Seth chuckled. Edward used the distraction to slip from the porch and into the garage. Bella was tempted to run him down and demand answers, but Jasper wove his fingers between hers, staying her.

"Not to break up the sappy moment, but… " Rosalie said, stepping up to the porch while holding up an arm that based on its size, could only belong to a youth. "Look, I know Alice said we couldn't kill him, but what are we supposed to do with the parts?"

"Redecorate the house?" Emmett suggested, making Jared and Seth both snort.

"Bring them here," Edward said, appearing as if summoned like a genie in a lamp. He had three metal cases in his arms. "Divide them among these so he can't reassemble on the trip."

"Trip?" Esme demanded. It was the first time she'd spoken since the clearing, but Edward's words seem to drag her from her grief.

"Alice told me what needed to be done," Edward said vaguely. He closed one of the cases with only Alec's head inside.

"What exactly needs to be done?" Carlisle questioned.

"When were you going to tell us about this?" Esme asked, voice worried. Carlisle moved to sit beside her on the porch swing now that he was done seeing to Seth's arm.

"Edward?" Jasper prodded, and Bella knew he disliked the emotions he was picking up from his brother.

"I have to return him to Volterra," Edward said, not looking at anyone as he sealed the third and final case with parts of Alec's torso, left arm, and right leg. "Jane will retaliate if we don't."

"What else?" Jasper asked before Bella could, because there were always strings when dealing with the Volturi.

"I'm going to make them an offer. One they won't refuse," Edward said evasively, not meeting anyone's eye.

"You're joining them?" Jasper asked, incredulously, understanding first.

"Temporarily," Edward admitted.

"Why?" Bella breathed.

To her, the Volturi would always represent the villains of her story. They'd threatened her life and happiness from their very first meeting, and again several times since. They'd stared in her nightmares when she'd still been human. They'd stolen her daughter's innocence when Jacob had been forced to kill one of their number in front of her. She couldn't imagine anyone ever voluntarily wishing to be one of them or a part of their world of violence and death.

"We destroyed six of their number today. Another last month. That's over a quarter of their total number. Jane, Renata, and Alec are the only three remaining of their core members, and only the twins do anything more than guard Aro. The loss will create a vacuum. It will leave them vulnerable to attack. We still need them to maintain the laws and secrecy for our kind," Edward explained by rote, as if repeating a conversation he'd already had. Probably he had - with Alice.

"Maybe they should be overthrown," Emmett suggested, voicing Bella's thoughts.

"No. Alice has seen that this will actually help us. My going, and our sparing Alec, their greatest weapon, is a sign of goodwill. They'll know we're capable of destroying them - what they feared all along - but that we don't want to replace them. It will eliminate their fear, and stop them from striking against us again at a later date.

"Today will be a wake up call for them. I will serve as a reminder of what they once stood for, and I will help guide them back towards the path they strayed from. They weren't always what they've become. It's important that vampires have oversight, a measure in place to keep them in check and prevent them from overindulging in their baser desires. Humans will suffer if they're gone altogether - particularly those living near the southern clans.

"If Alice went, they'd never let her leave. They won't keep me. My gift is close enough to Aro's that I can go to offer my assistance in helping them recruit new members, and monitor the area as an early warning system should another coven think to take advantage during this time. Then once things are in order I can return," Edward explained.

Bella was furious. Too furious to form words. Edward had just sworn to stick around - not even a week ago, he'd promised Mae that he'd be here when she got back. This was precisely what she'd been worried about happening when she let Edward back into their lives, particularly Mae's. He was forever breaking promises. There had to be some other way. His leaving couldn't be the only option right now. It was just the easiest. Or his way of being a martyr.

Possibly, he thought becoming one of the treasured sycophants would be more satisfying, or easier, than building a relationship with his daughter. Especially considering she was still holding a bit of a grudge.

Carlisle nodded, seeming the least upset by this new development. He suggested, "Like the Romanians?"

Jasper released calming waves, noting her anger, but she rejected them, choosing to stoke the flames of her seething temper instead. Waiting to unleash it on Edward at the right moment. First she needed to hear all of his flimsy excuses and explanations, so she had all the reasons to be mad at him laid out. Then she could hurl each pathetic one back at him like dodgeballs.

"Yes. There are others too, who wish for the chance to rule - like Amun," Edward added, his creased forehead indicating troubled thoughts that he was either remembering or currently reading.

"You don't have to go. I think we've proven we're up for a fight," Emmett said, making Rose hiss. She did not want to get dragged into another fight. Jared and Seth's expressions said they weren't up for another anytime soon either. They couldn't do this to the wolves again if there was a way to spare them facing this type of loss again.

"Not an option," Jasper said, giving Em a quelling look. Her brother just shrugged.

"What else? I can tell that's not everything," Seth said, calling Edward on still keeping secrets.

Edward was deliberately not looking at Bella. He hadn't, not once, since this conversation started. He must have known how she'd react upon learning of his decision to take off again. Bella couldn't believe this had been Alice's idea. She'd never suggest anything that would hurt Mae as much as this surely would.

"If Aro doesn't accept my offer, or agree to all of my stipulations, the cases are rigged to ignite - Alec will burn," Edward revealed.

"What other stipulations?" Jasper asked, evaluating Edward's strategy.

"Edward! They'll destroy you if you do that," Esme cried. She couldn't bear to lose another child today. The pain was still too fresh.

"They can never retaliate against the packs for their alliance with us or what happened here today. And most importantly, Renesmee is forever off limits. He must agree to never attempt to collect her. I'll be able to read his mind and know if he's sincere or not," Edward said, finally meeting Bella's piercing gaze. "Alice has already seen that he will accept - he knows he can't take us, and that we will be spreading the word of what happened here today. Others will stand against them in the future if they ever go back on their word."

Abruptly, Bella's anger fizzled out. She finally understood. He was sacrificing himself to protect their daughter. The way she had done when she was pregnant with her. It was how he should have behaved all along. He finally understood her position, and was making the correct choice. The one she had made all along.

"How long will you be gone?" she asked. Edward visibly relaxed when he sensed her approval.

"Many wish to join the guard. It is an honor to be extended an invitation. I don't think it will take long to replace those lost. Hopefully, I can even guide Aro into selecting members that believe in what the Volturi used to stand for, rather than what they've become," he said, stalling.

"_How long?_" she demanded more insistently.

"Alice expects it to take a year," he finally whispered. "Maybe a little longer."

"You promised you'd be here when she got back," Jazz said sadly, not accusing him, just pointing out the problem.

"I know," Edward acknowledged, nodding. "I'm doing this for her - to keep her safe."

"She won't understand," Bella warned Edward. She wasn't quite eight months old yet, and she understood that Edward had already willingly left her once. This would not go over well with her.

"It's the only way. Besides, they should know what your shield will be capable of after some practice."

"What do you mean?" Bella asked, confused.

"Eleazar couldn't stop thinking about it. If you can learn to project it, and we both think you'll be able to, gifts will be useless against anyone under your protection. We'll be invincible with you on our side."

"Invincible is a little much," Rose interjected, raising an imperious brow at the classification.

"Aro trusts Eleazar's opinion - his gift is to judge the potential of other's gifts, and that was his conclusion about her," Edward shared, excitement making his grin almost predatory.

"Me?" Dumbfounded. That was the only way to describe her state of mind. She was just Bella though. Ordinary Bella. Alice and Edward had the extraordinary gifts. Not her with the simple shield. Sure, it let her take on Alec today. But Jasper had fought two of the seven guards, not just one - with lots of help.

"Yes, Bella. You," Edward said, sighing exasperatedly.

"Now everyone will see you as I do," Jazz said, kissing her lightly just behind her ear.

"Then make your leaving again count. Make sure they know we'll burn every last one of them if they ever come within a hundred miles of her," Bella said, projecting as much steel and determination into the threat that she could. The message specifically for Aro from her. She hoped it shook him to his foundation when he saw it in Edward's mind.

"It's the least I can do."

* * *

Edward left first thing in the morning on the first flight out, hours before Mae returned. For once, Bella didn't blame him, and had actually encouraged him to go before she got back. It would have been harder for all of them if he'd waited to say welcome home then followed it up with goodbye.

She saw Jacob first, his head towered over the other passengers exiting the terminals into the baggage claim area at the small Port Angeles airport. Alice was right. He looked like hell. Black circles ringed his eyes the same as her family got when they needed to hunt. But it was the eyes themselves that were the most altered. Empty black pools. Blank as a pot of ink.

The sight left her cold. A first since her change. She actually shivered at the temperature drop the sight elicited.

Then Alice was darting forward, weaving through the smallest gaps between people like an eel, seeming to repel them enough to slip through without shoving. She launched herself at Seth, jumping into his waiting arms, and wrapping her legs around his waist.

Bella's mouth dropped open as she watched the tiny vampire plant her lips firmly on the surprised wolf's. His eyes widened momentarily, and he smiled a bit against her, before his eyelids shut and he pulled her impossibly closer.

"Guess she changed her mind," Jasper whispered in Bella's ear.

"Jealous? It could have been you," Bella teased, earning herself a discreet tap on her butt, not hard enough to make her react and draw attention, but enough to let her know there'd be payback for the suggestion later.

A flash of memory surprised her. It was clearer than most of what she remembered from her human days. Alice had greeted Jasper at an airport after risking her life, and all they'd done was hold hands and gaze into each other's eyes. It had been sweet, heartwarming, understated, but both seemed to prefer their new partners. They were certainly more exuberant with them.

Jacob was closer now, and Bella could see Mae clinging to his side as they walked, his arm slung over her shoulders to keep her close and not let her get lost in the crowd.

"Momma!" Mae cried when she spied Bella. At once, she released the wolf and ran to Bella. Bella opened her arms to hug her baby, but she saw the way Jake's fingers clasped the empty air where Mae had just been, seeking to hold on to the comfort she'd unknowingly been giving him, but just as quickly, he jerked his hand back as though he'd been burned.

"I missed you," Bella murmured, still watching Jacob. He and Jazz seemed to be having a staring contest. Then Bella felt the peace, love, and gratitude Jasper was offering Jacob. A gift to help him now and to say thank you for protecting their daughter.

"Carlisle? Can you and Esme give me a ride to the rez? I talked Sam into letting you be there for tonight. He had no right to tell you no before. They're waiting on us to get started," Jacob said, assessing Seth then taking a deep breath, debating. He must have decided against interrupting the two enthusiastically kissing. "Bella, I'll be around tomorrow to talk."

"Sure, Jake. We can go for a run or even a ride," Bella agreed, thinking of the motorcycle sitting in the Cullen garage gathering dust. It was slower than her, but the memories of riding with Jacob were nice, and she wanted to remind him of better times. Her words barely registered with him though. There was no noticeable reaction.

"Bye, Nessie," Jake said flatly, ruffling her hair as he walked out. Carlisle and Esme each stroked a hand down Mae's hair, smoothing it back out and reassuring themselves she was home safe then followed Jake. There'd be time for a better reunion later.

Mae placed her hand on Bella's cheek, an image of Jacob walking out replayed in her head along with feelings of concern.

"Me too, honey," Bella agreed, having nothing else to add to alleviate her daughter's concerns or her own about her best friend.

"Mae, did Jacob already talk to you?" Jazz asked, watching her curiously. She shrugged, hugging Bella again. Bella sensed he wanted to press her further, but Rosalie interrupted before he could.

"Are we waiting till they're done?" Rosalie gripped, looking bored and just a little disgusted as she watched Alice and Seth kissing passionately. Imagine what she and Emmett had put the others through. Payback time.

"If they're going to put on a show," Emmett said casually, shrugging as if to say 'What can you do?'.

Alice pulled back enough to say, "We'll find our own way - now scram!"

They were in the car before the inevitable question was asked. "Momma, why didn't dad come with you guys?"

Mae was seated between Jasper and Bella in the back of Emmett's jeep. Bella met Em's eyes in the rearview mirror before she addressed her daughter.

"You know how you left because some people were coming here and it was dangerous?" Bella began carefully.

"He wasn't hurt, was he?" Mae demanded, her heart rate and breathing accelerating dangerously. She was having a panic attack at the thought, Bella realized.

"He's fine, I swear," Jazz murmured, kissing the top of her head and running his fingers through her tangled curls as he filled the small space with calming vibes.

"Then where is he?" Mae chimed in a small, uncertain voice.

"He had to go meet with the people that wanted to hurt us - to clear things up," Bella explained.

"He'll be fine. They don't want to hurt him. If fact, they need his help on a few things, poppet," Jasper explained, reading her mood and answering her questions before she could ask them. She was so young though, it was difficult to clarify or even justify what was happening and make her understand.

"But he promised me he'd be here," she said, face crumpling. "Why would he want to go help them after what they did? I know they killed Embry. Irina too. Why does he even care about them?"

"He has to do this. He'll help them, so you'll always be safe. He'll call everyday, so you'll get to talk to him all the time, and he'll be back before you know it. If there was any other way - " Bella started, but Mae shook her head and interrupted.

"Don't. He left again. Just like before."

"Mae, sweetheart," Rose tried, turning in her seat to look back at her niece. Bella was surprised Rosalie was defending Edward, but it made sense. He was keeping the little girl she loved safe. Though she'd huffed and rolled her eyes when he'd talked about going.

"I'm glad he left. I don't want him to ever come back. I don't need him."

"Bella," Jazz said, shaking his head to stop her when she went to scold Mae for the harsh words.

Was this how it had been for the rest of them when she'd been the one mad at Edward and hoping he wouldn't return? Granted the circumstances were vastly different, but she felt pulled in opposing directions.

Time. It would just take time for things to sort themselves out. Luckily, now they had it. Mae wasn't going anywhere.

* * *

"How are you holding up?" Bella asked. Jake had showed up early, looking as if he'd gone another night without sleep. Death warmed over was too gentle a description. More like a corpse left out during a Phoenix summer so it'd been heated to Jake's natural one-oh-four degree temperature.

The sun hadn't even broken the trees yet when he knocked on the cottage door, unable to wait for them to even wake Mae and head to the main house before showing up for their talk. He'd declined her invitation to run or ride, asking for a simple walk instead.

"I'm not," Jacob said bluntly, not sugar coating it.

"Jake - "

"I got a part time job at a garage in La Jolla. Rachel's college roommate moved there and hooked me up. This way I can save up and use it to supplement the scholarships I got. I start in a couple days," he said, outlining his plans and raking a hand through his hair. There wasn't a trace of emotion in his words. He spoke like he was reading the newspaper aloud, and it was a story he had absolutely no interest in.

His plans though… They were so detailed, so well thought out. It startled her. And for the first time she realized this was really happening. Jacob intended to leave Forks and La Push. To leave her and Mae.

When Bella joined the supernatural world, she just sort of assumed it would always have Jacob in it. Especially after he seemed to be all right with her being a vampire. And of course there was the whole imprinting on her daughter angle to consider. So for him to say he was leaving… It didn't just bulldoze her. No. It straight up steamrolled her.

Bella grabbed Jake's arm with all of her new strength, halting him. He didn't resist, but he didn't turn to face her ether. "What? Jacob, no. You can't just take off like that. Not right - "

"I have to. I can't stay here. Everywhere I look… " He stopped, choking back anguished tears. The first hint that he wasn't truly dead inside. Her best friend still existed, somewhere buried deep within the shell standing beside her.

"It's too soon. Stop and think this through, please," Bella begging, pleading with him, urging him to open up to her. He'd helped her through one of the worst times in her life. She hoped he would let her do the same for him now. "Don't rush into any major decisions just now."

"Bells, I have to get away. I don't want to lead my tribe or be a werewolf right now. All I want is to not see reminders that my best friend since fourth grade is dead because our people are cursed," Jake said, making Bella understand that part of him had gone back to hating being a werewolf. It was like before, when he'd first phased.

"This is my family's fault," Bella whispered, knowing if the Cullens had never come to Forks in the first place, Jake wouldn't be a wolf now.

And Embry wouldn't have died two weeks before he graduated high school.

"I don't blame any of you. I love you all - even Rosalie. But that pull? The one tying me to Nessie - it vanished the second I left the airport with Carlisle and Esme," Jacob insisted, but he looked away as he said it, and Bella couldn't help but doubt the truth of his statement.

"You really did just imprint to keep her safe?" she asked, wanting him to say he really was planning to completely walk away from Mae.

"Looks that way. Now I'm free, and all I want is to be Jacob Black, eighteen-year-old college student with an unknown future and not a burden in sight," Jacob said, finally meeting her assessing gaze. His eyes begged her to accept this, to finally let him go when she'd refused every other time. To unshackle him from the burdens she'd heaped on him when he was too young to understand what getting involved with her would mean for his life.

"You want out of this life," Bella acknowledged.

"I'm not breaking up with you," he said dryly, echoing words that she suddenly recalled saying to him once, because now, like then, no words existed that properly fit their relationship and what they meant to one another. "You and Ness will always be important to me. I'll stay in touch. I'm not going wolf to run away this time, just moving to a different state so I can find my own way forward," he vowed, little cracks forming in the shell of his unemotional facade.

"Promise you'll call once a week. And visit every break. And keep shifting," Bella requested, knowing there was nothing else to say. He needed this, and she had to support his decision the way he'd ultimately supported hers to become a vampire.

"I will," Jake promised, but it sounded empty. The way seniors always swear they'll stay in touch with everyone they've ever met - even frenemies - at graduation, but somehow they never find the time to actually pick up the phone or email once the next chapter of their story begins.

"Have you told her yet?" Bella asked, knowing he'd instantly know who she referred to.

"No. Well, sort of on the plane. I just talked to Billy about it last night then spent the rest of the night packing. I figured you'd be up - not sleeping and all - so I came over as soon as I finished," Jacob said, trying to joke, but it was too fake and forced. His pain was starting to leak out again.

"When are you leaving?"

Jacob paused, as if not wanting to admit it. Finally, he said, "Tomorrow afternoon. Paul and Rachel are going to come with and help me find a place that I can afford."

Bella stifled her protest. It was so soon. This wasn't just him telling her he planned to leave. This was him telling her goodbye.

"If you need money -"

"I'll ask if I do," Jake interrupted softly, smiling indulgently. He knew her family had the means, but he was too proud to ever accept the handout.

"But you won't?" Bella guessed. His uptilted lips confirmed her theory. "I'll miss you," Bella admitted softly, unable to help herself.

"You too, Bells." He caught her up in a hug, lifting her entirely off the ground. He didn't release her for a good minute. The time it took to let go of their history. To shed the baggage so there was room for something new.

"You'll always be my best man, Jake," Bella whispered, releasing the piece of him she hadn't realized she'd been holding onto. She didn't need the security he promised anymore. Jasper would never let her down the way Edward had. She'd never need to depend on another, on Jacob, again. Jasper would always be everything to her from here on out. Already he'd been doing it, and she'd been relying on Jacob less and less.

Jacob deserved the chance to find the same.

* * *

Jacob had asked for an hour to say bye to Mae and explain for himself why he was leaving today. It was an easy request to agree to. Seth had promised to bring Mae back afterwards, and Jasper had dropped her off at the border a little while ago.

Most of the family had gathered outside. Carlisle was at the hospital, finally on a regular schedule again, though it'd only last another two or three months then they were moving.

Esme was working on the garden. Charlie and Sue were coming over for dinner so Alice could help with their wedding plans. The smell of the pot roast simmering that Esme had started that morning could be smelled all the way outside. Hopefully Sue and Charlie liked leftovers, otherwise it'd go to waste. Or Seth and Quil could always eat it.

Alice was perched on the rail above Esme, absently scanning the future. She'd decided to try a new career, and just couldn't bring herself to leave it to chance. Bella thought the real reason she'd taken up the new hobby was to keep herself thoroughly distracted this next year as she waited for Seth to finish high school and join the Cullens.

Rosalie and Emmett were cuddled up on the porch swing, whispering to each other about their plans later that night. Bella really could have done without knowing Rosalie planned to lick Emmett's popsicle, as her sister put it.

Bella, meanwhile, was sitting on the steps, anxiously awaiting Jasper's return. He'd promised to stay and help if it looked like Mae wouldn't take the news of Jake's imminent departure well. She was eager to have her daughter back where she could see Mae for herself and know she was all right. Being apart from her baby for days when she was still so young had been harder than she liked to admit.

She heard Jazz's approach before she saw him, and smelled him even before that thanks to the breeze blowing through the trees and up the drive.

He came towards her, moving at full speed. Bella was too busy admiring the graceful way his muscles flexed beneath his clothes to move.

Jasper didn't seem to care as he scooped her up in his arms, tossing her playfully over his shoulder as he spun around in dizzying circles the second he was close enough. Laughter poured from her lips, falling to mingle with his like raindrops.

Bella recalled never having heard him laugh until she'd been pregnant with Mae. Now, he laughed all the time. The sound musical and even more wonderful for the fact that everytime he did, happiness spilled from him, infecting everyone nearby, lifting their spirits impossibly higher.

Moments later they were both seated on the stairs, Bella nestled in his arms.

"Someone's getting lucky tonight - aside from me," Emmett teased, making Bella bury her face in Jasper's neck, embarrassed that her brother had so blatantly called her on it. After nearly a year, it was no easier for her to take Em's mockery of her sex life. At least this time he'd done it without Mae around.

She heard Emmett grunt and imagined Rose had retaliated by elbowing him - she'd have heard if it'd been a smack to the back of his head like it usually was.

Jasper just kissed her temple in response, too happy to chastise his brother or boast that he was right. Because he definitely was. Bella didn't plan to ever go a night without gorging herself on Jasper again if she could help it.

They both heard it at the same time. Mae and Seth were coming up the drive. Jasper stood first, opening his arms to embrace their daughter. Bella let him have this moment to comfort Mae after finding out she was losing her best friend. Bella feared that if she tried, she'd only make it worse since she was losing her friend too.

Mae threw herself at Jasper, flying twenty feet through the air when she jumped to clutch at him tightly. Sobbing into his neck as though her world had just come crashing down. Shattered into a million pieces with no hope of ever being restored.

Jasper held up a hand to keep everyone back, including Bella. It broke her heart to see her daughter so distraught when there was nothing she could do to help her.

He softly whispered to Mae for a few minutes before she calmed, still clinging to her papa, but more settled. Then he brought her over to Bella, sitting back on the steps with their daughter in his lap.

Seth followed behind, moving a touch slower up the steps, brushing Bella's shoulder in greeting as he passed, then moving directly to Alice's side. He shifted up on his toes then dropped back on his heels, rocking slightly with his hands stuffed in his back pockets, flushing nervously.

A tinkling laugh rang out, startling Bella, and making her spin to see Alice, leg still dangling over the rail of the front porch.

"She's finally lost it. Always knew it would happen eventually," Emmett mock whispered.

"Alice? You going to let the rest of us in on the secret?" Rosalie said, voicing everyone's curiosity when Alice continued laughing.

"It was this - now," Alice said, smiling as she looked from person to person. Her smile only widened when she met their blank stares.

"Real clear, sis," Em finally stated, prompting her to elaborate.

"I saw this happening," she said, like it was obvious what she was referring to.

"You saw Mae and Seth?" Jasper asked, uncertainly, almost hesitantly.

"No, no, but I saw it," Alice repeated quickly, shifting her head and widening her eyes as if they should suddenly understand what she was trying to say.

"It's not exactly uncommon for you to see things, Alice," Emmett muttered sarcastically, seeming to give up on her. It wasn't all that an uncommon occurrence.

"During Bella's honeymoon - _with Edward_. I saw this exact moment happening," Alice finally clarified, bringing them to the same enlightenment as her as she waved towards Bella and Jazz.

"So that's why you dumped Jazz," Em said, as if he'd only just now realized the significance of the event.

"I would have too, if I saw you kissing my sister," Rose said frankly. Emmett's only response was to kiss Rose, deepening it until everyone assembled was uncomfortable witnessing the moment.

"Thank you," Jazz murmured, ignoring his siblings and addressing Alice.

"I'm glad it happened," Alice admitted, ducking her head as though she expected teasing. Not even Emmett did, though Bella sensed he'd not hold back for long, when he turned his head enough to wink at everyone before resuming his kiss.

"I thought I knew what my happily ever after would look like, what my future held," Bella said, slightly overwhelmed as she took in her gathered family and the love of her existence.

"But I bet you never dreamed it would look like this - I know I didn't," Alice commented, adding, "and I can see the future."

"I guess it's still full of surprises, after all - for all of us," Seth whispered, leaning down to kiss Alice, the first he'd ever initiated in front of her family.

* * *

"What do you think of English?" Jasper asked, glancing up from his book and drawing her attention away from her own.

"That I've never really given much thought to learning any other language?" Bella mused, turning sideways on the sofa to better look at him. It was a strange question to ask. She'd mostly zoned out during her high school Spanish classes.

"I was thinking as a major. I have degrees in Philosophy and History, but I enjoy reading, and literature might be interesting to study. We could take some of the same classes, maybe 'study' together," Jasper said suggestively, running a finger up the inside of her thigh, but stopping short of where she'd actually prefer his fingers to be.

"I thought we were going to focus on being parents for now?" Bella replied, reaching over to trace one of the scars on his arm. Pleasure made him shiver in response and she relished the waves he released for her to experience with him.

"Mae will be ready for college herself in four, maybe even three years. I thought maybe you'd like to earn a degree before she did. It's only a few hours a week," he said, leaning closer to her, and trailing his fingers up and down her thigh almost absently. Almost.

"Is this so I don't miss out on any human things?" Bella asked, curious if the family was still on that kick. They'd all tried in the months leading up to her wedding, knowing there was a chance she wouldn't come back human. And in a way, she hadn't. Not entirely at least.

"It's so Mae can't brag about being smarter than you," Jasper said, partly serious.

At the rate Mae's brain was developing, she'd be ready for college in no time and would likely devour the knowledge at an expedient rate.

"Hmmm, in that case I might go with biology or pre-med," Bella announced without realizing that she even wanted to. They'd have time for multiple degrees though, so why not pick something useful first.

Bella caught Jazz's other hand and brought it to her lips, kissing each of his fingers. She sucked the tip of one into her mouth and was rewarded with his eyes darkening to black with lust.

"When did that interest pop up?" Jasper asked, closing his eyes, but still noticing her own surprise when she'd said it.

"The wolves. What if Carlisle isn't around? Or… " Bella trailed off, not needing to say more. Jasper had already detected her shift in mood from desirous to concern, and he adjusted, pulling back a little and taking a deep, calming breath.

"You're worried that if more of us had a medical background we could have saved Embry," Jasper said knowingly.

"I can't help but wonder," Bella admitted sadly.

"Two of his ribs went right through his heart. It was a miracle Carlisle kept him alive for as long as he did. He was bleeding out too fast for his body to heal the damage even with how accelerated it was. And his other organs suffered severe damage too," Jasper reiterated, despite knowing she now possessed perfect recall. Sometimes focusing only on the facts made an impossible and unfair situation easier to understand.

"I know. I just… "

"Come here, darlin'," he said, cuddling her against his chest and kissing her temple. "I think it'd be a good idea. You certainly have the control for it, and Carlisle would love teaching you how to use your new abilities to assist you in helping others."

"Yes, he would enjoy that," Bella agreed, imagining the enthusiasm Carlisle would display for the task. None of his other children had ever shared his passion for healing.

"But you don't actually want to be a doctor, do you?"

"You know me so well," Bella acknowledged, chuckling lightly. "No, I want the knowledge, but I think I'd prefer editing."

"So maybe English for your next degree then? And for now Carlisle can just supplement your biology education since an undergrad degree won't give you any actual or practical medical knowledge."

"Where? Are we still moving to Whitehorse?"

"No. Carlisle mentioned Fairbanks so we can be nearer to the Denalis. They need us right now," Jasper explained.

Bella had no interest in planning the move, and had just told Jasper and Esme to let her know when she needed to have her goodbyes to Charlie wrapped up, and her stuff packed. Other than that, she'd be fine with whatever they decided. Esme had thanked her for being so flexible, since some of the others - Rosalie - had a habit of making things difficult for her - Emmett too.

"That'll be nice for after Edward returns," Bella said, realizing he'd probably be moving back in with them considering the situation with Mae and the fact Leah was living there.

"Give her time. One of these days she'll give in and talk to him," Jasper sighed, hugging Bella closer.

So far Edward had kept his promise, and called Mae every day since he'd left, despite the fact that every day she refused to talk to him. She was hurting, and there was nothing Bella could do to fix the situation except support her daughter and show her that she was loved.

Jasper suggested that Mae was just waiting for the day Edward didn't call. Then it would justify her anger. He'd also thought that it was Jacob that Mae was really upset with for leaving, but after Embry, she couldn't fault him. So she was heaping all of her hurt and anger with Jacob onto Edward's shoulders.

Bella thought the real problem was that her daughter took after her far too much and couldn't handle losing two important people in her life only days apart. Change and loss was difficult for both of them to handle.

"Is Alaska nice?" Bella eventually asked.

"The hunting is good. More variety," Jasper said.

"Kate will be close to help me work on my shield," Bella realized, excited by the prospect.

She wanted to learn to be able to protect everyone she loved. It was also sort of nice thinking that one day soon she'd be a badass that the Volturi would tremble at the thought of. Serves them right after doing that to her these last two years.

"That is another motivation for moving to Alaska, and I'm sure Kate will appreciate the distraction. Though Garrett is probably helping with that too," Jazz said, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows and letting his lips curl into a knowing smirk.

Bella chuckled and playfully elbowed him in the side for going there. "It's nice something good came out of the loss. Those two found each other after so many years alone."

"They certainly had chemistry," Jazz said, and Bella felt the return of his interest in her when he mentioned having chemistry. She and Jazz certainly had it in spades too. His amorous feelings had waned as they spoke of Embry's death, but they were back in full now. Just knowing he wanted her so deeply made her want him in turn.

"Maybe I should study that instead," Bella breathed, sitting up and yanking her shirt off.

He stared at her, mesmerized, for nearly a minute. Just appreciating the sight. She wasn't wearing a bra, and he traced the slope and peak of her exposed breast with his eyes. "Stick with biology. The human body is so much more… wondrous."

"You could test my knowledge of anatomy," Bella offered, standing up and shedding her jeans as well. Her panties right along with them. She watched Jaser swallow, his gaze caressing her so lovingly she could almost feel it on her skin.

"Can we start with my favorite parts?" he asked eagerly, bringing his hands up to hover over her hips, not quite touching her, instead only teasing with the promise of it.

"I was thinking we could start with mine," Bella countered, sinking to her knees before him.

"Yes. I can wait until later - we have forever," he agreed, letting her pleasure him.


	26. 26: Alice

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

Here is Alice's final chapter :)

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 26 - Alice

It certainly wasn't planned. Alice had no intention of starting up with Seth the moment she arrived. But when she'd smelled him in the airport, she'd needed to see for herself that he was alive and unharmed. That need propelled her forward until she was launching herself at him.

He was ready for her, catching her to him easily. She clung, surrounding him with her tiny frame, never wanting to let go. He could have been the one that died. Not Embry, but Seth. And she'd have been too far away to even say goodbye. That could never happen again. She couldn't bear it.

Seth was hers, and she was his. Now that she'd accepted it, it was a done deal. Her vampire instincts had roared to life the moment she scented him, screaming, _Mine!_

She remembered Rosalie was explaining it'd been the same for her when she'd seen Emmett when he'd been mauled by the bear when she first saw him. Rose had shared more with her the night she'd told Bella her story. Once their human sister was asleep, Rose had confessed more to Alice and Esme, more than she ever had before. After her violent assault that ultimately lead to her turning, Rosalie had never wanted another man to touch her again. She'd truly believed she wouldn't be able to stomach any intimacy like that again. But then she'd seen Emmett, and it was like a switch flipped. Suddenly he was hers, so anything they shared together would be right.

Alice experienced that sudden shift now. Felt how it wasn't a decision she had to make to give him a chance like she'd been thinking these last months. No. It was an instinct that they belonged together. And it was guiding her now. Not that they didn't still have obstacles ahead of them, but hurdles could be jumped if you tried.

This time Alice initiated the kiss, not even waiting for him to react to her enthusiastic greeting. She felt how his lips curved when she sealed hers to his. He was thrilled. Quickly though, amusement vanished, replaced with hunger.

His mouth was sinfully delicious, promised decadence and pleasure. Luxurious as fur or new fleece brushing her skin. Hands slid down her back and over the full globes of her rear to squeeze her and bring her closer against him. The intimate caress made her gasp and moan breathily into his mouth. He nipped her bottom lip in response.

The others ceased to exist. The conversation and teasing ignored in favor of the man she was still reassuring herself was whole and hers.

Deeper. Alice sunk into the kiss, submerging herself in the sensation, relishing the heat and passion. He literally seemed to burn for her.

Her fingers threaded through his silky, soft hair hold him to her. Tentatively, she slipped her tongue past his lips to tangle with his. Then it was his turn to groan. He ripped his mouth away, resting his forehead against hers. Alice listened to the rough breathes he dragged in, suddenly grateful she didn't have to worry about breathing herself. Though it was gratifying to see him have such a visible reaction to her hello. After a few seconds, he captured her mouth again, not willing to wait any longer. Evidently Alice was preferable to oxygen.

When the others left, Alice detached her mouth long enough to say, "Let's run. We can talk on the way, and I'll wait at the border while you go to Embry's ceremony. Or do you want to spend tonight with your mom and Charlie?"

She slipped down the length of his body until her feet reached the floor, feeling how he reacted and hardened beneath the unintentional caress. Seth sucked in a sharp breath and met her eyes with his dark, expressive ones. Neither moved for a moment. Alice was still pressed fully against him. Then Seth stepped back, and took hold of her hand, leading her outside of the small Port Angeles airport so they could skirt through the edge of town before running in the woods.

"I spent last night with them," he said, answering her earlier question once he had his body back under control. "Are you sure you don't want to see your own family? You've been gone for months," Seth pointed out, always considerate of her desires.

His wholehearted goodness made her want to be with him even more. But now that they weren't kissing, she remembered the reasons she'd been trying to hold out in the first place.

"I have forever with them," Alice said, preferring to spend this time with him, so they could figure things out. She was interested in what he'd have to say about her concerns.

"So that… enthusiastic… greeting back there was… " he prodded.

"I'm glad you're alive, and let's figure out if we can make this work?" Alice tried, not openly declaring what her instinct was still insisting to be true. That they were already officially mated.

"Got it," Seth said, voice carefully controlled.

"Seth? I'm not saying maybe we won't, but I'm also not saying let's commit fully to one another this very second. There's a lot we still need to figure out," Alice tried to explain.

"What kind of things?"

"For starters, you still have your senior year of high school to finish, and we were planning on moving at the end of the summer," Alice said, beginning with the easiest issue.

"So I'll go with you and start in whatever grade you do or just do that year," Seth proclaimed, shrugging like it was no big deal. "That's what your family does, right?"

"I don't think that's a good idea," Alice admitted, hating that she wanted that, but knowing it wasn't the right move. She'd seen enough of Bella and Charlie's reunion before Mae arrived and it went blank to know how important time with family was. Seth had already lost his dad. He shouldn't lose his mom any sooner than necessary.

Alice suddenly had a new appreciation for Edward wanting to keep Bella human just a little longer all those months ago.

"Why not?" Seth demanded, interrupting her thoughts.

"If you really are planning to continue shifting - "

"I am," he declared. That was his choice, and Alice respected the fact. Was relieved to hear it, truthfully.

"Then you should take advantage of this time with your mom. She won't be around forever. You don't have to leave everything behind the way our kind typically does," Alice said. Recommending, "Make as many memories with her as you can that you can keep with you always. Of course you'll stay in touch after we move, but it won't be the same."

"All right," Seth agreed instantly, surprising her. But Seth was good at recognizing the wisdom in other's advice. It was part of what made him mature beyond his years. He was willing to learn and listen to others when they had more experience. Alice also suspected he hadn't considered that issue himself, and actually liked the idea. "Then what if you stayed with me instead when your family moves? It's only a year," he added.

"And what? I hide out like the bat in the belfry while you're at school since I'm supposed to be away at college, and no one can know I'm here? I'll go crazy spending most of my time alone," Alice said, knowing it was true. And also knowing that if she stayed, Seth would end up spending all of his time with her instead of his mom - defeating the purpose of staying.

"So we're talking long distance for the first year. Other people do it all the time," Seth said, nodding.

"You'd do that?" Alice whispered, not daring to hope. But then, hadn't he just spent nearly a year proving he would?

"I want to be with you, pixie. If you're really willing to be with me, then yes," Seth said easily, stopping them to lean down and kiss her gently. It was soft, a silent promise.

"Okay then. Long distance. With lots of visits - Bella and Mae will want to visit Charlie too," Alice agreed, grinning excitedly at him and tugging him forward once more. He had someplace he needed to be, but they could celebrate more later.

"What else?"

"Hmm?" Alice hummed, focused on planning out what they'd do during her first visit. Maybe dinner and a movie like a human couple would?

"You said things, plural, meaning you have other issues. Keep 'em coming - I'll find a solution for each," he vowed, then hesitated. Finally, he asked, "Is it still the age thing?"

"A little, though less than before. I just don't really like huge commitments when people are so young. A lot can change with new experiences," Alice explained. Repeating high school over and over meant she'd witnessed it countless times.

"You supported Bella's decision when she wanted to be one of you," Seth countered, confusion in his tone.

"Because I saw that it was her fate. But you'll notice, I didn't help it happen sooner than necessary - even after I promised her I would. Things change. I think her relationship, _relationships_, actually serve as proof to support my stance more than yours," Alice replied.

She'd been all for Edward changing Bella or letting the venom spread when James bit her because Alice had seen the end result, but each time when it didn't happen, the future changed. And she could still remember Bella asking her if Alice still saw Bella becoming one of them after the newborn attack. There'd been a chance Bella had changed her mind, and wanted a different future for herself. Even steady, constant Bella had changed to want a different future. It happened all the time.

There was also the fact Alice was a divorcee, and Seth had never even had a girlfriend before. Though after a year of convincing Alice that he only wanted her, Alice truly did believe he would be happy with her forever - no matter how many other women he met.

"There isn't really much I can say or do here. That's just one you're going to have to let me prove with time," Seth said after a long pause. He didn't seem upset, just resigned and willing to accept the challenge.

"Yes. And before you mention it, I'm not worried you'd leave me for your imprint. I was, but our time in South America put that to rest," Alice informed him.

"Really? What did it?"

"The way you took care of me and valued my needs. You'd never let me down or hurt me by choosing another just because of a mystical bond. That's just not the kind of guy you are," Alice said with conviction.

"Glad you finally noticed," Seth teased, but he was nearly glowing at how she'd described him. Alice could tell it would always be like that for them, each looking out and caring for the other. "Any other reasons? Cause by the time I graduate and join you, I'll be a legal adult off the rez, and that argument will be gone." Alice chuckled at the qualification of off the reservation since the voting age on it was twenty-one. Even Sam wasn't considered an adult yet. Though he would be very soon if she remembered correctly.

Her humor dwindled though as she prepared herself to share her biggest concern. The only one that actually was giving her pause. "My venom. I'm literally toxic to you. I'm worried that if we tried to be intimate, I could accidentally kill you."

"I've been thinking about that too," Seth said quietly.

"You have?" Alice inquired, shocked.

"I'm a teenage boy incredibly attracted to you. Of course I've been thinking about having sex with you," Seth muttered like it should have been obvious to her.

And now that he'd said he was thinking about them having sex, Alice was too. She just knew it would be different with him. The knowledge made her nervous and anxious. It would be like the first time all over again, only now without having to deal with vision interruptions.

Jasper had been a skilled lover. Extraordinary skilled, Alice knew. His ability to sense his partner's emotions meant he knew what they did and didn't like without needing to be told or steered. He had a built in roadmap. But all that skill had gone to waste with her. She was never present enough to appreciate it. How could she when she'd see Carlisle deciding to use a different suture pattern to close the abscess he'd just drained to make it less likely to rupture again. Or Edward deciding to buy two CDs instead of one when he went into town. Not exactly turn ons.

The worst part about it all, however, was Jasper's lack of annoyance. Not once - not ever - had Jasper felt anything other than concern for her and acceptance. He never minded how many times her passion fizzled out to the point they'd stop part way through, each denied a release. Even when it happened ninety-five percent of the time, and even when she ignored the visions, they continued playing through her head preventing her from fully enjoying his attention. It infuriated her that he'd not been as annoyed and frustrated as her. Instead, he'd unfailingly been a gentleman about it all, offering understanding without a trace of bitterness or discontent.

They'd both been so blind. Who wanted to spend eternity with a partner you could never enjoy sex with?

That was her fear now. If they weren't compatible in that sense, Alice couldn't do it again. No matter how much she'd fallen for Seth. She couldn't take it if he was understanding too. Or worse, if he grew to resent her for it.

"I meant the venom," Alice clarified, checking her thoughts.

"Definitely worth the risk," Seth said, turning his head to eye her.

"Seth! Be serious, please," Alice cried, coming to a stop. He did too, facing her with a grin. He was still thinking about sex, she could tell. Typical. "What if I accidentally bit you? Or, you know, just being inside me poisoned you," she huffed. His eyes darkened before he closed them.

"Great. I'm about to go to a funeral, and now there's evidence that all I can think about is being inside you," Seth muttered, clenching his fists and taking a couple deep breaths.

It didn't help.

He wanted her that much? Enough to overshadow the pain of Embry's death and trump the fear of dying?

Alice jumped on him, kissing him quickly.

For several minutes they stayed locked together, enjoying the heady taste of each other, and working through the tiniest fraction of the sexual tension they'd repressed so far. Only the knowledge that he needed to get to La Push soon, and they were still about five minutes from the border, made her release him.

"Not that I've been thinking about this or anything, because gross, but Edward and Bella were together while she was human. It didn't initiate her transformation, so I don't think your kinds' sexual secretions are venomous," Seth said, trying to sound detached and clinical, but not quite pulling it off completely.

It wasn't something Alice had considered, but he was correct. "Fair point. I want Carlisle to run tests though. It's not worth risking your life."

"I can wait," Seth said seriously. "There's no rush. Well, maybe we can ask him to rush a little."

"That was my last concern," Alice announced happily, chuckling at his comment and pulling him forward again. They really needed to get going.

"I'm surprised you didn't bring up missing out on kids," Seth remarked idly.

"You already told me you couldn't have any. Besides, we have Mae. And eventually her k -"

Alice broke off, wondering if Carlisle had run any tests on Mae yet. Nahuel didn't have any kids, and neither did any of his sisters. What did that mean? Had they just not tried? Did it matter who they tried with? Or was it even possible at all?

"Did you just realize she might not be able to have any?" Seth asked quietly, unsurprised. Unlike her.

"You already thought about that?" Alice realized.

"Let's just say Jake and Sam had a pretty massive fight, and that was one of many barbs thrown," Seth muttered, his disgust for whatever else Sam had said unmistakable. He looked over at Alice as they ran, and she saw the twisted grimace he wore. "Sam was way out of line, and went a lot of places he shouldn't have. Honestly, I don't think they'll ever come back after all that was said and implied. I know I can't forgive him for some of it, and I wasn't even the one he said it about or to."

Alice was flabbergasted. Was that what had been bothering Jake in Chile? He'd never mentioned anything, but he'd been overly distant and formal with Mae, and Alice had simply chalked it up to worry for the battle, then grief over Embry afterwards. But had it actually been about something else entirely? The conversation she'd overheard between Jake and Mae on the plane a couple hours ago suddenly took on a whole other light in the wake of Seth's revelation.

Jacob had become a friend to her and her family this last year. She didn't want to see him hurt.

The border came into view just then, she could smell where the wolves had paced to mark it, and they slowed to a stop.

"Go on," Alice urged when he hesitated. "I'll be waiting right here."

Seth nodded sadly, then took off. It was time to say goodbye to his pack brother.

* * *

The knock on the door had Alice squealing and bounding over to open it. The rest of the family watched her antics with a mixture of exasperation and affection.

She'd spent all day getting ready, trying on every outfit she owned, because it was impossible to predict how Seth would react when he saw her. In the end, Rosalie had come in, telling her to wear a white, spaghetti strap dress with a floral design that tied in the back and had a skirt that flared around her knees. She'd paired it with strappy sandals - heels really didn't help with the height difference anyway - and a long gold necklace.

It was her and Seth's first official date, and she wanted everything to go perfectly. Yet, for once, she couldn't help things along to that end. She just had to trust that it would happen naturally, and live in the moment since she couldn't see the outcome.

When she opened the door, Seth was standing there holding two bouquets. One of gerber daisies, the other sunflowers - Alice's favorite. So that's why Bella asked her yesterday! He wore a nice dark blue button down shirt that stretched tightly over his chest and shoulders, and was tucked into a pair of khaki slacks. Alice had never seen him so neat and fancy. Honestly, she half expected him to show up in cut-off sweats. She'd already mentally prepared to hide her disappointment if he did. But here he was, doing the very opposite of her expectations. Somehow he always managed to do that.

"Hello, pixie. Are your parents home?" Seth said formally, straightening even more and tilting his chin up a notch.

"Yes… why?" Alice could hear them coming up behind her, curious to see what Seth wanted. Esme touched Alice's shoulder lightly when she caught sight of Seth.

"Bella may have mentioned your obsession with recreating cliche human moments. I wanted to make a good first impression on them, and assure your father I'd have you home at a decent hour," he said, winking at her. Smiling, he handed the daisies to Esme, saying, "These are for you, ma'am. And these are for you, pixie." The sunflowers were offered, but a peel of laughter burst from Alice's lips, and she started jumping up and down, too excited to actually take them.

"They're lovely, Seth. Thank you. Alice, I'll put them in water for you," Esme said fondly, taking her flowers for her and disappearing into the kitchen.

"You're perfect," Alice exclaimed, making Seth smile even wider, so all of his pearly white teeth showed.

"I try. Dr. Cullen? I swear I'll have her home by midnight," Seth said, trying to be serious and failing as the words betrayed his humor.

"I think that should be acceptable, but let's say one since it's not a school night," Carlisle replied, playing along, "But no drugs or alcohol."

The jest made both Alice and Seth laugh. Carlisle hugged her, then Seth was ushering her to the Volvo. Edward had lent it to Seth to use until he got back from Italy, and Seth was saving to buy his own vehicle in the meantime.

"Where are you taking me?" Alice asked as they headed away from Foks.

"Port Angeles," Seth said evasively, reaching over to take her hand where it rested on the console. Gigginess welled up inside her.

"Are we going to dinner?" she asked, determined to find out more.

"No, not much point with you," he teased.

"Very funny. Then where?" she demanded, desperate to find out where he was taking her. The suspense was eating her up.

"So impatient. Would you let it go if I said it was a surprise?" he asked, though he'd already guessed her answer.

"No. Not a chance," she stated flatly.

"The beach. I thought we could take a stroll as the sun sets - it should already be twilight when we get there, then we can catch a late movie," Seth revealed. It was the most cliche, romantic evening she'd ever heard of.

"You're perfect," Alice repeated, making Seth smile broadly. He pulled her hand up to place a warm kiss on the back. Shivers ran through her at the contact.

"This is the only first date I will ever have. I wanted it to be epic for both of us."

"It is," Alice vowed. Not revealing that it was her first date too. Somehow her and Jazz had never actually gone on a real date. Just outings and nights spending time together. She'd tell him later. This was about them, not her past with another.

As they walked along the beach, they talked about everything. Alice shared her plans to try her hand at designing a fashion line. Seth had made the suggestion months before, but it had stuck with her. This seemed like the perfect time. Alice would need something to occupy her while Seth completed his senior year.

Seth admitted that it felt like he'd just had an epic summer vacation since there'd been no school, and they'd been living in a jungle. It was weird to be home now, and actually have a whole summer ahead. Particularly since there weren't any threats hanging over them this time.

They even discussed how Seth was dealing in the wake of Embry's death. At first he baulked at sharing, not wanting to ruin their evening with such a heavy and depressing topic, but eventually he opened up. Alice was there for him to lean on. And he admitted how difficult it was to shift and not encounter Embry's thoughts anymore. Especially since Jake had taken off as well and only shifted about once a week and never for longer than a couple minutes at a time.

Jake had shut the rest of them out, totally closed himself off, and seemed intent to forget anything and everything from his former life. Alice's heart went out to him. Between Sam and Embry, Jake was in a bad way. She wished he'd let his friends help him, or at least Mae, but he had to find his own way to move forward.

During the movie, Alice barely paid any attention, cuddling against Seth instead, and relishing the chance to feel like a normal person for once. He'd given her this opportunity, taken pains to make tonight perfect. Like something out of a movie.

Once, months ago, she'd scoffed at him for being sappy with her, but things were different now after all they'd shared. It wasn't an empty gesture. Now it felt like he was giving her something precious. He was helping return all of the human experiences she'd either forgotten or been robbed of because of being locked up in that asylum.

"We still have a few minutes - cause I actually did promise Charlie and mom I wouldn't be out all night," Seth said quietly when he parked in front of her house. The look he gave her said everything else.

"Are we going to make out in the car until Carlisle flicks the porch light to tell me it's time to come in?" Alice asked loudly, knowing her father would hear. The sound of several people laughing inside told her they had.

"Yes, pixie, that's exactly how I planned to end this evening," Seth said, bending uncomfortably over the console to kiss her. He didn't utter a word about the way it dug painfully into his side, just kissed her until he was breathless.

And until Emmett appeared on the porch, flicking the lights and tapping his watch. Oh, she would make him pay for that in a minute.

* * *

"She took my call today." The happy words rang through the phone, quick and rich with emotion.

"She did? Edward, that's great," Alice said, feigning surprise. Bella had come running over when Mae had wordlessly accepted the phone today for the first time when Edward called. That had been a couple hours ago. So either the call went well - which it did from the tone of her brother's voice - or he'd been busy and only just now been able to call.

Every day Edward called, and every day Mae refused to speak to him. Looks like that was finally coming to an end. About time.

It was funny. Edward never used to call when he was separated from the family. Now, almost like clockwork, he'd call someone every eight hours or so. He rotated through who he spoke to, with Mae being the only person he called daily, aside from Leah, but he made a point to speak to each of them regularly. A year later, and he still hadn't let up. Esme was over the moon with the change.

"Renesmee even said she was looking forward to telling me about her trip to visit Billy tomorrow," Edward gushed.

Jacob may have nearly vanished from their lives, but Billy hadn't. Bella and Jazz took Mae to see Sue, Charlie, and Billy for a weekend every month. Alice suspected that lately, Mae talked to Billy more often than she did the wolf. It made her sad how things had turned out, but it wasn't her place to intervene. Plus, Seth had specifically asked her to stay out of it.

Of course, that was after Alice had called Jake and screamed at him for skipping coming home for Seth's graduation and going away party so he could pick up an extra shift at work instead. Funny how there was always an extra shift available when it was time for him to visit. Any excuse for Jake to avoid returning to La Push.

"I was just thinking about how much better you are at remembering to call us," Alice said, diverting her mind away from the problem of Jacob Black.

"Leah set reminders on my phone before I left," Edward admitted, surprising her. "She said checking in would help me be less self-involved," he added, and she could picture him rolling his eyes.

"So you still talk to her too?" Alice prodded, already knowing the answer. Maybe now he'd finally own up to what was happening there.

"Yes," Edward said simply.

"Are you ever going to tell me what's going on there?"

"I don't know myself," he said slowly, reluctantly. "She's beautiful, strong - can certainly take care of herself," he breathed. That would be a draw for him after the issues around his compulsive need to protect Bella. Leah was the opposite end of the scale in that regard. Alice supposed that was one way to avoid making the same mistakes twice.

"You're learning to respect that strength," Alice acknowledged, hoping to steer him into opening up more. It worked.

"Bella reminded me of the girls when I was human. They depended on a man to take care of them. That's how I was raised, and what I expected from myself. Leah's teaching me to change and adjust my way of thinking when the circumstances change," he explained.

"Is that all it is then? She's helping you?"

"I care about her, and I think she needs me in a different way. I've been in her head, so I know she's developed feelings for me too, but she has no intention of phasing forever. One day soon, when she's fully recovered from Sam's betrayal, she'll want to stop so she can age and have a normal human life again. I already know I can't be with a human again, and she won't want to be with a vampire after she stops phasing."

It was a revelation to Alice. Seth had never mentioned that his sister planned to stop phasing. Did he know? She didn't want him to one day have to deal with losing her. But if she stopped phasing, that was her fate.

"Are you willing to try? To love her even if it's only temporary?" Alice asked, returning to Edward. One problem at a time.

"Carlisle and Tanya have both said it would be good for me," Edward admitted, revealing that he'd sought council on the matter already. He was usually so secretive about his feelings. This boded well as evidence he really was maturing and growing up.

"But is it what you want?" she asked, concerned for him. He shouldn't do something just because others said he needed it.

"I'd settle for a handful of years of happiness over hundreds without," he finally said, seeming to make the decision right then.

"I think she'll help you be in a better place for when the right one comes along. Then you'll have forever," Alice said, trying to offer him hope and a light at the end of his journey.

"Any ideas about how much longer I'll be needed here, rather than be there with her?"

"All the muscle has been replaced. Dacian even has that ability to detect where trouble involving our kind will happen. Aro must be thrilled with him since it's such a useful gift for law enforcement. Now you just need to find one more talented individual to round things out. I haven't seen anything, but I'd say another month or two," Alice predicted.

Already it was July. Edward had been with the Volturi for just over a year.

In that time he'd even managed to warn the ancients after Vladamir and Stefan inspire one of the southern covens to attack the Volturi in retaliation for destroying their newborn army. The two Romanians used the southern coven to test the Volturi strength and see if it had indeed been weakened enough for them to attack.

But between Edward's forewarning, and the three new guards he'd helped secure, the coup was short-lived. And the new allegiance between the Cullens and Volturi was stronger than ever.

"It can't go quick enough," he muttered.

"Is it that bad?"

"More annoying than anything. Jane and Alec are furious, but Aro forbade them from lashing out or doing anything. The rest… their thoughts are obnoxiously centered around pleasing their 'masters'," he relayed with disgust. She could well imagine.

_Edward was on a doorstep, knocking on the chocolate brown door. It opened to reveal Tanya's sad face. Though she smiled at Edward, reaching down to take his bag from him and usher him inside._

"Why are you moving back in with Tanya instead of us?" Alice demanded, unable to mask her hurt.

"To be with Leah. And I don't think Renesmee has forgiven me that much yet. Maybe in another year or two," he said stiffly.

"I'm sorry, Edward," Alice said softly, wishing she could hug her favorite brother.

"I understand where she's coming from. At least she invited me to visit Nahuel with her, Bella, and Jasper next summer. I'd like to meet him," Edward said with forced casualness. Finally! Alice sensed she'd finally have an ally. Another person that wasn't instantly taken with Nahuel.

Mae talked about the hybrid a lot. Strange considering how long it'd been since they met, and how brief the visit had been. Everything was Nahuel this or Nahuel that though. It was enough to make her pull her hair out.

"Overprotective father wants to read the mind of the guy his daughter has her first crush on," Alice teased.

"She hasn't met enough guys to know any better. And she's only one. She's too young for a crush," Edward denied immediately. "Isn't she?" he added, uncertainty showing through. After being in teenage girls' heads for so long, he seemed to just realize what exactly he was in store for with his own daughter.

"She's nearly two and she's actually closer to fifteen. It's what teenage girls do," Alice said easily. Oh, he would learn. She couldn't wait to see what Mae put him through. It would provide enough amusement to last a few decades. At least.

* * *

Seth was at the registrar's office filling out the last of the transfer papers. He would be finishing his last year of school at the University of Wyoming, then continuing onto medical school there. Carlisle was ecstatic. Particularly since Bella really hadn't been able to drum up any enthusiasm for the subject. Mae would be starting college there in the fall too, and everyone was moving to Laramie next week so they'd have the summer to get settled in. Seth had moved in with them three years earlier when he'd graduated high school.

Alice genuinely believed that it wasn't possible for her to be happier than she currently was. The same was true for her entire family.

Most of the house was packed up. Alice was helping Esme with the last of the kitchen while Bella and Jasper played a game of chess at the table rather than helping themselves. Mostly, they were just waiting for Mae to get home from spending the day with Edward.

The father and daughter were finally on good terms, though he'd not be moving with them to Wyoming. Edward was actually the one that suggested Mae move into the dorms and have a real college experience, at least for her first go around. Bella had panicked, not wanting her baby to be that grown yet. Mae had sensed the difficulty in her mother and decided to continue living with her and Jasper for at least a few more years.

Edward, not wanting to smother Renesmee with his ability to read every thought she had when she was ready to start dating, had decided to stay in Alaska with Leah and the other Denalis. Alice was proud of her brother for respecting his daughter so much. He'd finally stopped trying to control everyone around him. And Mae had vowed to visit often and even trusted Edward when he'd said he'd visit at least once a month as well.

"_Alice, dear… have you and Seth considered getting your own place this time," Esme asked carefully, wrapping a crystal plate in a green foam covering._

"_No. I think Seth wants to be able to contribute to the cost," Alice said, pausing to roll her eyes fondly at his foolishness, "and right now he's just focused on finishing school and studying for his MCAT." Alice tapped the box while Esme held it closed._

"_You were thinking of staying with us another year or two then?" Esme asked, face showing her dismay._

"_Is that a problem?" _

_Esme's hands fluttered. Then her face smoothed as if she'd braced herself to deliver unwelcome news. "The two of you are too noisy. I can't take another two years of Emmett's comments," she said bluntly. "It's time for you to get your own place until your exuberance for one another is a bit more under control."_

Alice was mortified as she blinked the vision away. The feelings were pronounced enough that Jasper looked over at her from his chest game, a single eyebrow raised in silent question.

Alice glared at him, equally silent as she commanded him to mind his own business.

It had only been about three years since Alice and Seth had been able to progress to a sexual relationship. Carlisle had taken countless samples from each of them, endlessly testing them to ensure that she'd not unintentionally kill Seth if they tried to have sex. Carlisle had been unfailingly professional the entire time, but she found herself relating to Bella and how she'd felt having Carlisle constantly examining her while she'd been pregnant. No girl wanted her father thinking about her sex life.

When Carlisle had finally given her the go ahead, it was just before Seth's spring break. She'd surprised him, and the two had spent the entire week locked up in the old Cullen house in Forks. Just the two of them.

Perfect. Magical. Romantic. Exciting. There really weren't words to sum up the true significance of that week or how it permanently altered their relationship. So much so, that Alice had agreed to stick around for the last couple weeks while Seth finished school. Parting after that hadn't really been an option.

"Esme? Seth and I are getting our own place in Laramie," Alice announced.

"That's a wonderful idea, dear. I was thinking of suggesting it myself," Esme said, smiling knowingly. After all, she knew exactly how Alice's gift worked, and now she didn't actually have to have the awkward conversation. Alice rolled her eyes.

Jasper laughed knowingly, and Alice glared at him again. He was one to cast stones. Esme still wasn't letting him and Bella live in the main house. Bella was deliberately studying the chess board, feigning ignorance. At least Edward was with Leah and not here to witness her humiliation as well.

"Yes. I know you were," Alice muttered.

* * *

Alice flat out refused to live on the opposite side of the city from the rest of her family. Jasper, Bella, and Mae already purchased the house Alice would have liked to get. It was a quaint little cabin, hardly big enough for three, but precisely Bella's taste. The best part, it was only a mile from the house Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, and occasionally Edward and Leah would be sharing. Just because Alice and Seth had to move out, didn't mean she wanted to go far.

But proximity resulted in a lack of choices. There were only two places available that weren't ridiculously large, an aspect she knew would make Seth uncomfortable, and for that reason alone meant the others weren't options. She planned to slowly ease him into more extravagant and luxurious homes over the next century or two. Subtly, so he wouldn't even notice it happening. Alice had never denied she possessed a devious streak.

Seth had talked her into sneaking in to one their first night in Laramie so they could check it out without the realtor blathering on about this or that.

"I'm not sure," Alice hedged. The other one had a better bathroom and a finished basement, but she did prefer this kitchen.

The granite countertops were light with chunks of grey and little flecks of black. The cabinets, oven and fridge formed an L-shape, with the sink and bar across from them to form an almost triangular open space, and angled so it overlooked the living room.

"About which part?" Seth asked, lining himself up against her back and planting his hands on the counter on either side of her. His heat made her light headed, and she could feel his arousal pressed insistently against her.

"This layout is better, but the other is more updated," she replied, spinning to face him. Desire etched itself into his face, darkening his hooded eyes completely to black, and making his pulse point beat rapidly in his neck. She watched it ticking away, jumping frantically.

His hands went to her hips, lifting her to perch on the edge of the counter. Once there, his hands caught the edge of her shirt, tugging it up. Seth bent to kiss her stomach. Alice glanced around, taking in the unfamiliar house and weighing the risk of getting caught here doing this.

Totally worth it.

She pulled her shirt the rest of the way off, grateful it had a built in bra and that she was already completely bared to him. His lips blazed a path up to her small breasts, though Seth swore they were perfect. His hand covered one while his lips, tongue and teeth feasted on the other. The beaded tip of one nipple disappeared between his lips and into the inferno of his mouth.

"Hmm, yes. More please," Alice begged. The answering tug when he captured the bud with his teeth had her back arching, bowing impossibly high towards him.

His lips released the suction around her pebbled nipple with a tiny _pop!_

Seth urged her to lean back as his mouth moved south, kissing a ring around her belly button while he tugged her leather legging off. Alice braced herself against the counter to lift her hips enough to help him rid her of the clothing.

He pulled away just long enough to yank his own t-shirt off, then he was back, wedging himself between her spread thighs and kissing the crease between her hip and thigh.

"You're as sweet as honey," he murmured, continuing his exploration of her, lapping at her with the pad of his flaming hot tongue.

He'd said the same many times before. The first time he had, she'd said, "It's too bad you're not a bear shifter." He'd laughed so hard it was several minutes before he'd stopped long enough for them to continue enjoying one another.

But it made sense that she'd taste sweet. That's how she smelled. Alice just wished she could taste him as thoroughly, and see if he was as earthy. It wasn't something they'd risked yet, even after three years. Such thin skin that close to her razor sharp teeth and venom was something they were working up to. Soon though. Soon she thought she could try without risking his life - knowing the deadly consequences if the experiment failed, typically put a damper on the moment.

Already they'd managed some licking. He liked when she teased the tip with little flicks of her cool tongue. It reminded her of the way rosemary and thyme smelled. Seth usually got too excited, and would yank her up, burying himself inside her only seconds after she started.

"Don't stop," Alice commanded when his tongue swirled around her clit. "Right there, please. Seth!"

Alice's hands threaded through her hair, feeling like she had to squeeze her skull to keep it from flying apart as her release built. All the while, Seth's tongue lapped at her sex, circling and teasing her entrance.

His teeth moved up to nip the little bud, hard enough to be painful for a human, but just right for vampire flesh.

"Seth!" Alice screamed as she came, her peak hitting her fast. Starbursts of light flashed behind her closed eyelids, and waves of ecstasy crashed through her, spreading from her center all the way to the tips of her fingers and toes.

He'd shucked his pants while pleasuring her, so he stood, entering her while her body was still shaking with pleasure, sinking into her fully before she'd had a chance to recover. The sudden presence of extreme heat and fullness within her had her gasping, "_Oh, god! Yes!_"

He pulled the boneless shell of her limp stone torso up, wrapping his arms tight around her. She could do nothing more than cling to him. Maybe Esme was right, and she was a little loud when she was with Seth. She just couldn't believe what she'd been missing out on for the last century!

One of her legs circled his waist, her heel digging into his butt to spur him on. The other braced itself against the cabinet to keep from sliding over the smooth surface.

"Alice, you feel so good," Seth moaned, his head falling back as he rocked into her, slowly at first, then faster.

"More," Alice demanded, leaning down to lick the tip of his nipple. The cold caress made him shutter, jerking irregularly within her.

Once, Seth had admitted to masterbating using icy hot when he'd first developed feelings for her. He'd admitted that being with her was surprisingly similar, only so much more. The gel had tingled in much the same way, starting cold, then heating as the friction increased.

The temperature changes made for a more intense experience than what he saw in Quil's mind when he was with his wife, Kyra, or even what Jake felt with his longtime girlfriend, Natalie. Alice didn't like that Seth shared the details of their sex life, but she supposed it was no different from her family actually hearing it as it happened.

She'd asked if she could watch him masterbate sometime, and he'd reluctantly agreed, saying only, "I'd just rather be with you now that I finally can. I'm sure one day it'll be easier to resist, but right now I don't think I'd be able to keep my hands off you if you were in the room watching me with those hunger eyes of yours."

His admittance to being unable to resist her had made her jump him right then, tearing off his clothes and riding him like a pony, or a wolf in this case.

"Alice, pixie, ease up... or your foot... is going to go... right... through... the wood," Seth panted, words coming only as he withdrew to warn her. She heard the groaning sound of wood close to splintering then.

"Oops," she breathed, rising to meet his thrust, using the countertop as leverage instead. "Mmm, good."

He chuckled at her reaction, speeding up even as he did.

"I'm close," Seth warned, knowing that's all she'd need.

The heat of his climax as it flooded her sent her over the edge, following him milliseconds later - a you jump, I jump situation. It always happened that way. Like a trigger.

The rush of pleasure consumed her, encasing Alice completely. She was lost to the world as she cried out unintelligibly. The words a series of garbled sounds, but the feelings were too overwhelming not to expel something.

Seth's arms were steel bands around her, keeping her close as they floated down from the epic cloud they'd flown to.

"Well that's one room christened," Seth said, puffs of his rapid breaths fanning onto her neck from his position with their cheeks pressed together. "Ready for the next?"

"Next? Again - already?" Alice breathed, amazed at his never ending stamina. She'd thought only vampires could recover so quickly.

"I'm always ready for you. I'll never get enough," Seth vowed, kissing her deeply.

"So we're picking this house?" Alice asked, savoring the anticipation of Seth claiming her so thoroughly in every room of the house. There was a railing in the loft she could picture him bending her over. Would it be strong enough to hold them?

"I thought we could christen all the rooms in both places then decide based on which one we had more fun in," Seth said, running his nose down the column of her neck, and kissing the hollow at the base. "Plus if it's updates you want, I can always do the remodeling myself. What'd you say?"

Their first house was going to be based on an adventure. Oh, the memories. And did hallways count as a room? Or the yards? She would definitely not resist if he decided they did.

"I'm in," Alice breathed, wrapping herself around him even as he lifted her up and carried her towards what could end up as their bedroom.


	27. 27: Jasper

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

The final chapter is here! Took long enough, right?

Any dialogue you recognize is from _Breaking Dawn_. Most has changed at least a little, but there are a few bits from the book. PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Chapter 27 - Jasper

September 2016

Mae was bouncing, tiny clicks sounded each time the silver and white stiletto heels tapped the wood floor at the top of the stairs. Impatience filled the hallway where they waited. Exhilaration the only other feeling he detected. She couldn't wait to get started.

"You're sure mom's okay with this?" she asked for the eighth time, cheek's reddened and stretched from smiling so much already today.

"Why wouldn't she be?" Jasper asked, humoring her.

"I know how she feels about marriage, and people that marry young," Mae said, rolling her eyes and glancing out the window again. The twelfth time in less than a minute.

"You've been living with him for two years now. If you don't marry him soon, Edward will be the one you need to worry about," Jazz said dryly.

"Yeah, but I'm not even ten yet," Mae said, frowning at the oddness of the words. She'd already graduated college and started her career. And here she was on her wedding day - all before the age of ten.

Human years at least. Being a hybrid made her a little different. She'd stopped aging at age six, and currently looked about twenty-three.

"You will be in a week," Jasper reminded her. "And Bella couldn't possibly be any happier than you are - trust me, I know."

"You would," she agreed, delighted at the jest. "Do you think you and mom will ever get married?"

"Maybe, someday. We're in no rush," he said, the idea of proposing to Bella making his lips turn up of their own accord. He could picture it all - including how she would suspiciously ask, 'Why?' if he ever did.

"I think you should," Mae said, looking out the window again, "Hff," she grunted when the results were the same as the last fourteen times.

"I'll let you be the one to persuade her then," Jasper said easily. It didn't really matter to him one way or another, but he'd be willing to push the subject with Bella if it was that important to Mae.

"He's here!" she exclaimed, darting forward to race downstairs. Jasper caught her hand easily to stall her. "Fine! I'll wait like a good little girl," she sighed, but pressed her face to the window anyway, trying to at least catch a glimpse of him.

"Careful - Alice will kill you if you smudge your makeup," Jazz warned. His little girl looked radiant today. The beads on her dress catching the light, and glittering the way the rest of the family's skin did when touched by sunlight.

"Right. Don't want to face the pixie's wrath today," Mae agreed, still trying to look outside.

"Did you doubt that he'd show?" Jasper asked, amused as he watched her. Her love was so obvious he didn't need his gift to perceive it. Though if it wasn't as consuming and satisfying as he'd detected, he'd have tried talking her into waiting a little longer to get married. He didn't really want to hand his baby over today. But she was every bit as much in love as Jasper was with Bella.

"Never," she breathed. A hearty sigh sounded when she realized she'd not spot him through the window. It was facing the wrong direction.

"It'll take them a few minutes to get settled, poppet. There's still time for me to get Edward if you'd like him to walk you as well," Jasper offered. He'd been secretly thrilled when she'd asked him alone to walk her down the aisle and give her away, but he had to check. She was Edward's daughter too. They were equally her fathers, if in different ways.

"No, he's got the music. This should be for us. I'm so grateful you chose to be my dad. It feels right this way, and we have you to thank for today even happening," Mae said thickly, tearing up as she spoke. He went to her at once, cupping her cheeks and brushing away the tears. "Thank you, papa. For knowing what I needed before I knew myself," she said, hugging him tightly.

"I'm your father. It's my job," Jasper whispered, kissing her cheek.

* * *

_Flashback_

_July 2014 - 2 years ago_

_Mae barrelled through the front door, slamming it shut and slumping against it, chewing on her thumbnail. Anxiety. Confusion. Disappointment._

_The turbulent emotions, so out-of-character for his daughter to feel threw him. Jasper and Bella had been relaxing on the sofa, each reading a book when she came in. Bella's alarm amped up when Mae didn't even seem to notice them._

"_Renesmee?" Bella called, willing her daughter to spill._

_Caught. That was the only way to describe the way Mae's eyes rounded at the sight of her parents. Seconds passed, then she blurted, "I kissed Brady." _

_Seth's cousin, Brady was visiting their home in Laramie, Wyoming. Though technically, he was staying with Alice and Seth. The wolf just earned his undergraduate degree, and was moving to Chicago for law school. Since he was driving, he'd decided to spend a few weeks with them this summer. Mae had one more year herself at the University of Wyoming, since she'd looked at least eighteen even when she was actually only five, and she'd stopped aging only a year after that. _

_She was loving spending time with someone outside of the family that knew everything about her. All her secrets - and she knew his as well. They'd been nearly inseparable for days while her boyfriend was visiting his sister in Ohio._

"_What about Nahuel?" Bella asked, blinking quickly. Her lips were still slightly parted at the stunning revelation. Mae and Nahuel had been dating for a year now. He'd even moved up to the states and enrolled at the same school to be closer to Mae. _

_For the first two years of college, Mae had dated. A lot. At times it seemed like every week there was a different guy she was mentioning. Bella had been flummoxed, repeating numerous times, 'I don't know where she gets this from - certainly not me!'. _

_Jasper just thought Mae seemed lost. Searching for something she'd never find until she remembered where she'd left it. Jazz was ready to help when she was ready to face the truth. Looked like the time had finally come. _

_Then the summer after her sophomore year, she'd asked to visit Nahuel again. He'd stayed in contact with her, and made his interest and intentions clear. Edward disapproved, but Jasper was content to let it play out. He already suspected how it would go. That summer, Mae finally gave him a shot, and he'd uprooted his life for her. _

"_Do I love him?" Mae asked, face scrunched as she directed the question to Jazz. _

_Jasper frowned, unable to conceal it. "If you have to ask, you already know the answer."_

"_And if you're kissing another," Bella added, shaking her head as if unable to believe Mae's confession._

"_You did," Mae fired back. Seth, or someone else, must have told her about Bella's time with Jacob, because Jazz knew Bella never had._

"_Because he wasn't the right one," Bella said, shocked by both the speed and accuracy of Mae's rebuttal. Not to mention the content. Adding, "Neither was or it wouldn't have happened."_

_Jasper kissed Bella's temple, slipping his arm around her to say he loved her too._

"_Should we expect to see more of Brady?" Jasper asked, letting her know she'd have their support, no matter what she decided, but trying to convey with his tone that she should read more into what Bella had just said._

"_No… he just reminded me… " she said quietly, trailing off and shrugging._

"_Speaking of the past, have you thought about going to visit Jacob? The two of you have barely even spoken these last few years," Jasper suggested, ignoring Bella's shocked confusion. He'd explain his suspicions later._

_Jacob and Mae hadn't seen each other since Quil's wedding two and a half years after he moved away from La Push. Things were strained at the wedding when Jake introduced his date, Natalie, to his 'friend' Mae. At approximately seventeen, and after some time apart, Mae had noticed Jacob was an attractive guy. But she'd sensed his discomfort at her attention. He was seriously considering building a life with the girl he'd brought. The strain had damaged their already tenuous relationship. _

_Practically breaking it. _

_Honestly, it had. _

_They'd already gone from talking every day to every couple months. After the wedding though, it was only on birthdays or the occasional Christmas or when Billy orchestrated a chance encounter. And then it was just awkward small talk. Forced and uncertain. _

_Eggshells. They walked on eggshells with one another. _

_Just the sound of Jacob's name had Mae's heart racing. Precisely the evidence he'd been looking for. Her crush had never really faded. It was the reason every guy she dated was ultimately found lacking. She didn't have to admit the truth aloud for it to be true._

"_We've both been busy," Mae hedged, using the same excuse she always used when asked about Jake. Usually, it was Seth prodding her. He didn't like the ever deepening and widening canyon that had developed between his niece and his alpha._

_Edward had even told Jasper that he'd seen in Seth's thoughts that Jacob had begun asking for updates about Mae for several months now._

"_He and Natalie ended things a little while ago. He could probably use a friend right now too," Jasper informed her. Jake and Natalie had been together for four years. Everyone thought they were the perfect couple. But Jake couldn't commit to her. Something held him back. _

_Dawning comprehension flowed from beside him. Bella was finally on the same page. He stifled a chuckle._

_But from Mae, all he felt was hope. Hope that the timing was finally right. Hope that Jake would see her for who she'd become, not the girl that needed his protection. Hope that he could finally love her back. It was an unrealized dream that suddenly had the potential to come true. _

"_You always feel better once you talk to him," Bella murmured encouragingly. _

_Mae nodded once, then turned and walked out of the house, not bothering to say goodbye or even pack a bag._

_End Flashback_

* * *

Mae had never returned from that trip. She'd spent the rest of the summer staying with him, then the two had moved and bought a place together.

Jasper had never asked for details, but a few weeks after she left, Jacob had called and asked Jasper, Bella, and Edward all to come visit. Mae had been radiant when they arrived. Utterly at peace with herself in a way she'd never been before. Her emotions in that moment alone told Jasper everything he'd ever need to know.

As her father, and in the unique position of being able to assess people more thoroughly than the average person, Jacob had always been the man he hoped Mae would choose as her life partner and eternal mate.

The private conversations he'd had with Jacob later only confirmed his knowing.

"It's time," Alice chimed, the words carrying to where they waited inside.

They were at the Cullen's house in Forks, where their journey started. The place Bella had met the Cullens in the first place. The place where Edward and Bella had married, hours before Mae was conceived. The place Bella officially joined the Cullens - first in marriage, then with venom. The place where Jake imprinted. The place where Bella and Jasper fell in love. The place where Mae spent her first year, or thirteen years, of life. The place where the packs originated. The place where it all began, and where they'd always eventually return to.

Edward began playing the piano, a complex and rich melody that he'd composed specifically for this moment. The moment his - their - daughter tied herself to another for eternity. To the man she loved above all others.

Jasper walked Mae down the aisle, her practically dragging him in her rush to get there, and handed her off to the only male outside of the Cullen family he'd ever trust to care for her. Jacob was the only one that would cherish and nurture her heart the way it was meant to be looked after. The wolf nodded, acknowledging the acceptance and faith Jasper offered, feeling the emotions involved in the traditional gesture.

Then Jake's eyes were only for Mae. The rest of those gathered ceased to exist, the same as it was for Mae.

The words of the ceremony barely registered. He was too busy gorging himself on the plethora of intoxicatingly sweet, positive emotions running rampant throughout the wedding. Jacob's joy was nearly incandescent, rivaled only by his daughter's. Though Jake was also a bit stupefied, as though it were some great mystery as to why Mae had chosen him from all the others. Jasper didn't blame him. He often felt the same with regards to Bella.

With only vampires, werewolves, and humans in the know in attendance, the backyard was quickly converted to a dance floor for the reception.

"Our baby is all grown up," Bella whispered, awed, as she leaned against him, the two of them watching Jake and Mae dance, each beaming widely.

"I remember when you were married in this very yard. Alice spent weeks, months really, planning. Every detail had to be perfect - and you couldn't care less. Not unlike how she's been ordering us all about to prepare this recently," Jasper said, knowing Alice was listening nearby.

"Hey! It was obviously worth it!"

"Did you ever imagine that your life would lead here when you moved from Arizona?" Jazz asked, ignoring his best friend.

"No. Not even after I met your family. I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. I thought I knew exactly how my life would be once I decided to be a Cullen. But I never knew to expect more, dream or hope for more. Because that's what it's been - this time with you. I could live for a hundred, hundred millenia, and never want for more so long as I have you by my side," Bella declared, laying her heart bare to him. He'd not expected the words when he made the comment, but they meant everything to him.

Bella showed him everyday that was how she felt. Her emotions never lied, always told him everything. But hearing her confirm those feelings now, when they'd just given their daughter into the care of another, soothed him in a way only Bella would ever recognize he'd needed.

"I hope you can feel that it's the same for me," he whispered thickly, not having the words to say himself.

"I can. I do everyday," she vowed, glowing with her happiness.

"Papa? Will you dance with me?" Mae interrupted. She'd been standing there for most of the words he and Bella had just exchanged, but it looked like her patience had reached its limit.

"It'd be my pleasure, poppet," he drawled, bowing over her hand before swinging her up into his arms, and making her giggle like a child once more.

"I hope I'm always as happy as you and mom," she said, the only comment she had for what she'd heard.

"I have a feeling you will be," he said, glancing to where Bella and Jake were now dancing, both laughing loudly as they did.

The song played without any more conversation, both content to share with their gifts. Mae showed him scenes from their life together, moments that were significant to her involving the two of them, or them and Bella. Throughout it all, he shared his pride, love, and hope with her.

"Can you take me to dad?" she requested when he started leading her back to Jake, where he was still laughing with Bella. Was that cake smeared on her face?

They passed Quil with his wife, Kyra, who was expecting her fourth child, on the way. Claire, their preferred babysitter, was helping wrangle the other three children, one of which was trying to pull on the tablecloth that the cake sat on.

"Jake said they're going to play another song for us to dance to in a second - something about returning a favor," Mae said to Edward when they reached him.

He smiled, bittersweetly, a touch of genuine humor, but his eyes went back to staring at Maggie with her perfectly curling red hair - not wild and orange like Victoria's, but deep and rich, like the heart of a ruby. Fascinated. Jasper recalled when Edward had looked at Bella that way. Edward nodded absently, agreeing that he was feeling much the same just then.

_Edward, what is it? _Jazz finally mentally asked his brother.

"Who is she?" Edward asked, nodding at the redhead. Maggie was beautiful. Probably Edward's age, maybe a little younger when she'd been turned.

"That's Maggie. She's part of the Irish coven. I met them a few years ago on the trip I took with grandpa Carlisle and grandma Esme," Mae said, eyes shining with delight at the prospect of her dad having a crush on someone new.

"Why? Do you want me to introduce you?" she asked impishly.

"She has the most sincere mind I've ever heard," Edward murmured, all but ignoring Jasper and his daughter.

"She's gifted. Anytime someone lies, she feels a flash of incredible pain," Mae explained.

Considering the way Edward used to bend the truth to suit his purpose, this should be interesting.

"She - where did you get this song?" Edward demanded, switching topics part way through as Rose began playing a lullaby on the piano.

"Auntie Leah gave it to Jake. He said you wrote it about me. I hope it's all right that I had Auntie Rose play it for us to dance to," Mae said, suddenly sounding uncertain. Edward's emotions showed devastating love.

"It's perfect, and so are you," Edward choked out, pulling Mae onto the dance floor and spinning her around. "I wrote it in Italy. Working on it whenever I missed you."

"I love you, dad," Mae said sincerely.

"You're my proof," Edward vowed.

"I'll remind you anytime you forget," Mae replied, speaking in a secret language only they could understand, much the same way she had with him. It warmed Jasper's heart to see them together.

Jasper looked around, taking in the rest of his family. Alice was on Seth's lap, nuzzling his nose. Sue and Charlie sat at their table, but they were purposely looking anywhere else. Leah was dancing with her new husband, her long, glossy hair flaring out whenever he spun her. Human suited her. Though judging by the tiny bulge in her dress, her glow might be due to her pregnancy.

Mae lead Edward over to Maggie when the song ended, and Jasper watched as Maggie ran him through his paces.

"So you were the one able to sleep with a human," Maggie asked, looking him up and down with interest.

"It was not without difficulty," Edward said, and Jasper felt his discomfort with the topic clear across the dance floor.

"No, I haven't," Edward said a second later to something he'd read in her mind.

"Yes," Edward huffed, exasperated.

Jacob bumped his shoulder, drawing his attention away from the train wreck unfolding before him.

Jasper glanced at Jake, and even though he'd been the one to come up and start the conversation, his attention was on Mae. Jazz followed his line of sight to see Mae hugging a crying Billy - the reason they'd almost been late today. Billy's white hair looked brittle and dry where it draped over Mae's arm.

Jasper could smell the cancer eating away at him even from this distance - all of the supernatural beings here could. Carlisle had already been treating him for months before this, but it didn't appear to be helping. Nothing could after a certain point. Sometimes life just ran its course.

"Now I know why I imprinted," Jacob proclaimed, drawing Jasper's attention away from his son-in-law's sick father. Son-in-law… wow. Never thought he'd think that phrase.

"This should be good," Jazz prodded.

"I'm the only one brave enough to handle you two as father-in-laws - a mind reader that knows every inappropriate thought I have, and an empath that can feel it. Talk about dangerous," Jake explained, mock shuttering. Though he did have a point.

"You've never been scared of either of us," Jasper pointed out.

"Because I also know you'll always be aware of exactly how much I love her," Jacob said confidently, attention returning to Mae where she was watching them together, smiling at what she'd heard.

"You better. You're my best guy, but she's my baby," Bella said, coming over to join them.

"Sure, sure, Bells," Jacob said, mouthing 'I love you' at Mae. She darted over as soon as he did, as if it was rehearsed.

"On that note, can I steal you for a minute?" Mae asked him pointedly. Jasper felt the shift in emotions from each of them, and deliberately tried to block it out.

"Wh - Oh! Yeah, see you guys," Jacob said, following after her like a mindless zombie.

"You know what that was about, right?"

"I'd rather not think about it," Bella said primly.

"We could always take a page out of their book," Jazz suggested.

"Later," Bella hissed, burying her face in his neck and kissing a scar, making him shiver in anticipation. "I think it's time we took that extended hunting trip you suggested last year," she whispered, kissing the mark more thoroughly, and making him moan, helpless to resist her.

"Let's slip away right after they leave for their honeymoon," Jasper pleaded, wanting alone time with his mate. The woman he would love for eternity.

"Anywhere. I'll go anywhere with you - forever," Bella vowed.

Because they did. Everything he thought he'd known after becoming a vampire had remade itself when he met Bella. Truly met her and got to know her. And now they had forever - together.

* * *

Thank you everyone that stuck around this whole time. I appreciate every person that reviewed and encouraged me to keep writing - it's the best motivation :). Please keep them coming so I can improve and use them as an excuse to write my stories instead of reading others.

I'm not working this weekend, so I might also be convinced to write a bonus chapter about when Seth imprints and what happens there. Let me know if you're interested in reading it.

I started writing Mae's story, so hopefully it'll be ready to start posting soon. It will alternate between Mae and Jake with each chapter being approximately a year in their life. The chapters are going to be pretty long though so no guarantees about quick updates.

I'm also working on the other Bella/Jasper story I have planned so look for those chapters as well.


	28. Bonus Chapter: Bittersweet Surprises

Author's Note

Please forgive any spelling and/or grammar errors. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you think!

I had this planned from the beginning, and was just going to explain what happened or include it in Mae's story, but I figured I could go ahead and write it as a scene to say thank you to those that reviewed, and for any that have enjoyed this story.

The sequel to _I Thought I Knew_ is now posted. It's called _I've Been Missing You._ Please check it out, even if you're not ordinarily a Jacob/Renesmee shipper, and let me know what you think. I love feedback :)

This is really just meant to be a glimpse of the future and proof that Alice and Seth can withstand the test of time and fate. Someday I might make it into a full-length story, but for now it's a one-shot.

PS I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own anything :(

* * *

Alice: Bittersweet Surprises

2081 - 75 years after chapters 1-25 in _I Thought I Knew_

It was an ordinary day. Nothing special. Nothing unusual. Alice was working from home with Esme. She'd 'graduated' high school the year before, and had returned to her favorite pastime of playing the stock market ever since. Typically, she worked from Seth's office at the hospital, but Esme had seemed bored this morning, so she'd decided to stay home and keep her company.

They had developed a new routine over the years with all the new additions to the family. Usually two or three households were established whenever they moved into a new area, and sometimes a couple would go somewhere else to have a few years alone. It made it easier to go unnoticed. The various couples took turns being Carlisle and Esme's adopted children and returning to high school. The others would pursue a personal interest and spend a few years working at it. Jake, Mae, and Seth were the only three exempt from pretending to be teenagers. None of them looked young enough for the ruse to be believable.

The sound of a car pulling out of the drive, the tires reversing in the mud registered a half moment before the quiet, hesitant knock on the front door brought Alice's attention away from the computer. Rapid breaths, fluttering hands, a racing heartbeat - or was that two heartbeats... What in the world?

Alice had been so caught up, she'd not even noticed the approach. The only humans that ever visited were Seth and Jacob. Or one of Jacob and Mae's children. Leah too, though more rarely now. It was getting harder for her to move about since her hip replacement surgery. Sometimes her two sons or grandkids came to visit their uncle Seth, but more often, Alice and Seth went to them.

Charlie and Sue used to drop in as well, but they'd both been dead over two decades now. Charlie, closer to thirty years now. His poor diet resulted in a heart attack. Actually, it would be the thirtieth anniversary of his death next month. Idly, Alice wondered if Bella planned to return to Forks to place flowers on his grave as she did most years.

Esme met her baffled look, but her mother just shrugged and moved to answer the door. Alice glanced out the large picture window, but couldn't see their visitor from her current position.

"Hello, dear, can I help you with something?" Esme asked kindly.

"My grandfather sent me here," a girl's voice answered, the sense of nervousness carrying to Alice as she noted the uncertain quiver in her words. "I think you know him - Jared Cameron."

The unexpected reference had Alice up and moving to see the girl without conscious thought. She'd hardly given any thought to the wolves from Sam's pack. Most of them had chosen to stop phasing or had already moved away when Jacob and Mae moved back, including Jared. Jake just, sort of, _absorbed_ the remaining wolves into his pack as well as any new additions that popped up over the years.

The last time Alice had even seen Jared was Seth's graduation party all those years ago. Jared hadn't been one to come around for a quick chat when the family visited the Blacks while they'd lived on the reservation. Though she knew Seth stayed in touch with Jared and Paul, Brady too.

Alice could see the resemblance now when she caught sight of the girl. She had Kim's long, thick eyelashes, and her full lips. The same waist-length, stick straight hair too. Her skin was darker than most of the Quiluetes, however, more brown than bronze, likely inherited from her father. She was striking, truly beautiful.

Though it wasn't her appearance that had Alice's mouth dropping open and her eyes widening. Well, not the physical characteristics of her face at least. It was her protruding belly. The oversized sundress did little to mask her condition. Not at this advanced stage. The girl, and she was obviously still a girl, was most definitely pregnant.

She had said she was Jared's granddaughter, and not great-granddaughter. Right? She was so young to be pregnant.

"Jared sent you to us?" Esme clarified, blinking in surprise before remembering her manners and ushering the girl inside. "Please, have a seat. You must be dead on your feet."

"That obvious? Thanks," she said, flushing as she cradled her bulging stomach protectively.

"You're glowing, dear. But you shouldn't be on your feet too much, especially after you've just traveled all the way here from La Push, I'd assume."

They were currently in Michigan, just outside of Harvey in the upper peninsula. It was one of the smallest communities they had ever settled in, but all the forests made it ideal for hunting and they had all the privacy they could ever wish for with so few neighbors.

"Well, Grandpa insisted that I needed to see Dr. Cullen. He's apparently the best, and from the stories , I'd have to agree. Grandpa was hoping you could help me," she said, obviously uncomfortable asking strangers for help, but she smiled at each of them in turn anyways.

Why would he send her to them? Wouldn't a closer doctor be easier? Was the child all right?

"He's at work, but I can call him. The hospital is only about two miles up the road in Marquette," Esme offered, raising her hand as though to push the girl's long hair back behind her ear or pat her shoulder, but she stopped short of actually touching her, remembering the wolves initial dislike of contact with vampires.

"Is something wrong with the baby?" Alice couldn't stop herself from asking. That would be so terrible.

No visions came to her, so she was resigned to asking in order to get answers. Grrr. She'd never get used to her limitations. Why couldn't she see anything? Was it just because the girl was related to the pack? That didn't seem to fit.

Or maybe it did.

She'd never seen anything about Kim or Emily or Claire before. Usually, she'd not even been able to see Sue if her mother-in-law had been on the rez. Never had she seen a vision involving Leah - not even after she stopped shifting. There genetics and close ties prevented it.

"No, he's fine," the girl said reassuringly. "Or he was. I think he still is if that can be judged based on how hard and often he kicks my kidneys and bladder," she added, wincing a little and rubbing at a sore place on her side.

Alice hadn't detected any motion from the baby. It would have been easy to see through the thin dress she wore. So it must have happened before she arrived, and it was just lingering pain she was remembering now.

They hadn't had a baby in the family since Jacob and Mae's three. The two ended up having twin girls and a son before Mae's unique fertile period came to an end. All three were grown now, and off traveling the world. The girls were like Mae, immortal hybrids in their own right, though they didn't age quite as rapidly as Mae. Bryana and Sarah were backpacking together like nomads. Edward, and his mate, Maggie, occasionally traveled with their granddaughters, and last she heard were with them now. Their son, Jensen, was his father's son. A wolf. He'd recently left the rez himself, determined to find other shapeshifters like him somewhere in the world.

"He?" Esme asked, pouncing on the pronoun the girl had used.

"Yes -"

"You're sick," Alice blurted, sensing it now. The sight of the baby had consumed her, but the smell filled her nose more insistently now, demanding her attention. She smelled the same way Billy had in the months leading up to his death. "Oh, I'm so sorry," she murmured, instantly regretting blurting it out the way she had.

Understanding dawned, a switch being thrown to illuminate the situation with radiant spotlights. Carlisle was her only hope of surviving. But the smell. It was too much like Billy in those final weeks. And there had only been so much Carlisle could do for him then. Cancer treatments had come a long way in recent decades, but there was still no cure for the disease.

"It's fine. Do you think you could call Dr. Cullen? Grandpa really wanted me to see him as soon as possible," she said, dropping her head forward and running a hand over where her child rested within, as though the baby provided her with a measure of comfort. Possibly it did.

"Of course," Esme said, face pinched with sadness. "Alice? Get - I'm so sorry, I didn't even ask your name," Esme gasped, covering her mouth with her hand in horror at the realization.

"It's all right. I'm Alyssa," she said, smiling shyly. A dimple appeared in each cheek when she did, making her look even younger.

"Get Alyssa something to drink, please - and some food. Poor dear, you must be starving after your journey," Esme instructed, going into the library where her cell phone was charging.

Alice quickly prepared a sandwich and a glass of apple juice. Alyssa watched her, a secretive smiling playing about her lips as she did. Considering she didn't offer any protests, Alice hoped she liked the food. Years of watching Seth and occasionally making food for him made it easy to do by rote now. Not eating any herself meant it might not actually be any good, but Seth wasn't likely to complain. He loved her too much and wasn't picky.

"How old are you?" Alice blurted, unable to make an accurate guess.

"Sixteen," Alyssa admitted, wincing a little and unconsciously covering her belly with both hands, as though to hide the baby from potential censure directed towards Alyssa.

"You must be scared," Alice said, clarity coming even without her sight. It was a difficult and undoubtedly challenging position to find oneself in. Her heart went out to the girl for the journey she'd undertaken so far.

Surprise crossed Alyssa's face, but she looked Alice over even more closely before taking a sip of the offered juice.

"Hmm," Alyssa finally hummed, either in appreciation of the juice or agreement to Alice's summation. Possibly the sound was meant to encompass both. "I know all about you. I grew up hearing stories about how Seth fell in love with you - a vampire - and chose to protect you against Uncle Sam," Alyssa said suddenly.

She looked at Alice as though she were a fairytale come to life. It was how Alice expected she'd have been if she'd been lucky enough to meet Coco Channel - still a missed opportunity she lamented.

"Well, he was helping Jacob protect Bella -" Alice tried to correct, but broke off when Alyssa quickly shook her head in denial.

"It was always all about you for him," Alyssa revealed. Had others been privy to thoughts shared in the collective mind that Alice had never heard about?

Seth had never mentioned anything specifically about her when he'd explained his desire to join Jake's pack, but Alyssa sounded so certain. A lightness and warmth filled Alice at the idea he'd been falling for her even then. It felt like only yesterday.

"I was never very romantic. My friends always had that covered in spades. But your story? That was the real deal. Epic. Something to admire," she added.

"Thank you," Alice said softly, grateful to know the wolves spoke kindly about her relationship with Seth. She'd hate for him to be maligned to future generations when they heard the stories of the cold ones just because of his association with her. "You didn't hope for a romance yourself?" Alice asked, curious now.

"No. I've spent the last few months watching my grandfather all but will himself to death. I've been the only thing stopping him up to this point. I can't ever imagine wanting to be that dependent on another person," Alyssa announced bluntly.

Alice didn't think that was quite the right way to look at things, but Alyssa's conviction in her words was so apparent, that she knew arguing would be pointless.

Carlisle and Seth arrived then, and Esme ushered them in. Alice had heard her on the phone with Carlise explaining the situation the whole time the two had been traveling towards the house.

There was a flash of momentary startlement when Seth caught sight of Alyssa, but it was fleeting, quickly replaced with concern. His hand trailed low across Alice's back, a caress hello, when he walked behind her to stand on one side of Alyssa while Carlisle took up residence on the other.

Alyssa chuckled at Seth, but didn't acknowledge him. Her attention was for Carlisle alone once he was seated beside her.

"I hope you don't mind that I brought Seth with me. He and I have been working together for many years, and given his area of specialty and relationship with your family… " Carlisle said, trailing off to give her leave to permit or refuse the situation.

"It's fine," Alyssa said, chuckling to herself again, though this time the light sound was almost self-mocking.

"Then, will you tell me what's wrong?" Carlisle requested, adding, "At least as much as you can."

A folder that Alice had largely ignored up until this point was handed over. Carlisle began perusing through it, handing a few of the documents over to Seth to assess as well.

"I went to the doctor a couple months ago because I wasn't feeling well. Chest pain, fatigue, weight loss, and a cough," Alyssa added, looking at Alice since the two males were preoccupied.

"Is that when you found out you were pregnant?" Alice asked, watching the tiny movement of the child pushing against Alyssa's left side. Some of those symptoms were consistent with pregnancy. She remembered from her research for Bella. Maybe her other illness had been overlooked and that's why it was so bad now.

"Yes, but that's also when I found out I have lung cancer, stage four," Alyssa added for the two women's benefit since they weren't reading the charts containing her diagnosis. "I'd chalked the chest pain up to grief, thinking I was imagining it for over a year. By the time I learned it wasn't a manifestation of losing my parents or all just in my head, it was too late."

"You decided against treatment?" Seth asked, glancing up from the page he held, and catching Alyssa's eyes.

Cancer was the area Seth had decided to pursue given his own medical history. He'd been an oncologist for a very long time now, though he often studies other things as well just for the diversity. A few times, he and Carlisle had opened their own private practice when there wasn't a hospital within easy commuting distance and they just did family medicine. Since Seth still had to sleep and he already worked quite a bit as it was, Alice didn't like him wasting hours driving each day when they could be doing something more fun, so a local office was preferable.

"I would have had to abort the baby," she said gravely. "I needed surgery and chemo if I was to have any hope, and even then it would likely have only been a temporary solution."

"You're awfully young. You didn't consider that an option? It could have worked." Carlisle suggested delicately. Alice could practically hear the words he left unspoken - if you had treated the cancer earlier, you could have lived long enough to have a half dozen babies later, instead of dying to have this one now.

"Grandma Kim was thirty-seven when my mom was born, a surprise. I was even more of one. Mom was almost forty when I came along, my sisters both already in college at that point. Then my parents died two years ago. Car crash. I was in the back seat," she shared, pausing to look at each of the four in turn. "It was a miracle I survived. I honestly believe this baby was the reason. I lived so I could have him."

Alice had never thought that way, given fate that much credit and control over her life. It almost went against her gift. To her, life was all about personal choices and possibilities based on those choices. Fate wasn't masterminding life. Things didn't happen to people, and they were just helpless puppets, along for the ride with no freewill to influence the direction. Life wasn't a rudderless boat set adrift in the ocean. The person living that life was steering - even sometimes if that meant guiding their boat through gail force winds and thirty-foot waves that seemed insurmountable.

It could also just be that she simply refused to believe Mae and Jake were only as happy as they were because fate decreed it. Fate had no part in the way they found their way back to one another and chose each other to love instead of others.

But she respected that people were allowed to have a difference of opinion on the matter, so she didn't roll her eyes or otherwise dispute the girl's words.

"I'm sorry," Seth said softly, sympathy pouring from him.

He looked at her as though the girl in front of him was Mae, someone precious that needed protection, even as he leaned closer to Alice, seeking the familiar press of her side to his.

"When was the last scan that you had?" Carlisle asked, filling back through the folder as though afraid he'd missed something. Unlikely.

"Three months ago," Alyssa admitted with a wince.

"You're a little over five months along now, yes?" Carlisle asked. "Closer to six?" Alyssa nodded.

"What happened after the car accident?" Esme said, moving behind the girl to run a gentle hand over the girl's head. Alyssa leaned into the touch the way a cat arches its back into a person's hand when stroked.

"I moved in with Grandpa Jared and Grandma Kim," Alyssa said.

"I thought… " Alice began, recalling Jake mentioning Kim's death about six months ago.

"She did," Alyssa said, understanding Alice's train of thought.

"Yeah… " Alyssa said, wincing slightly. "I was upset, wanted to feel alive, went to a party, and… well… this. Alcohol and grief don't usually lead to good decision " She rubbed her belly again, then added ruefully, "I'm the opposite of my family, having a baby so young."

"We should go to the hospital to run some more tests," Carlisle suggested.

"You'll come with too?" Alyssa asked fearfully, reaching out to touch the back of Seth's hand with her fingertips.

Seth looked from Alyssa to Alice, uncertain. Years of knowing him told her that he'd planned to stay behind because he wished to speak with her privately. He was uncomfortable with the request. Alice could read him so easily.

_Oh, Seth,_ Alice thought wryly, unexpectedly amused at Seth's predicament. It wasn't difficult to form a suspicion as to the source of his discomfort. Alice gave him a pointed look, and glanced at Alyssa where she was still waiting for his answer.

"If you'd like," he agreed, but took Alice's hand. "Alice? Come with," he requested, wanting her to be a part of this process. Probably he was starting to feel a bit distressed at the reality of the situation and how to share his news.

Sympathy quickly replaced her amusement. This was not going to be easy for any of them. Least of all, her husband.

They had been married for fifty years now. Their anniversary was a couple months ago. Seth had planned the whole thing, surprising even her. He'd used what he knew of her favorite parts of all the other weddings she'd planned over the years for their family and friends, and comments she'd made when they watched movies or when she was involved with the fashion world.

It was a complete surprise thanks to the limitations of her gift. He hadn't even told the rest of the family, aside from Leah, until the day it was set to happen to prevent someone from making a decision that she might accidentally see. His sister had been in charge of hiring designers to custom make Alice's wedding dress based on a few pictures that Seth had discretely taken from her magazines over the years, each her favorite at the time. Even Charlie and Sue didn't know the real reason they'd been asked to visit until after they'd arrived to discover their son was getting married.

Perfect didn't begin to describe it. Just enough over the top to suit her, but elegant, fun, and filled with a million tiny details that had been painstakingly thought out and orchestrated to make the day spectacular. Okay, it had been a little extravagant, but he knew her, and knew she'd love that fact.

"So... Are we going to talk about this?" Alice asked from the backseat of the car. Seth had insisted Alyssa ride up front with Carlisle so she'd be more comfortable, while he rode in back with Alice.

"What -" Carlisle began to ask, but Alyssa talked over him, turning her head to look back at Alice and Seth.

"I'm not blind. I saw the look. It's how Quil still looks at Claire. I know you imprinted on me," Alyssa acknowledged, sounding only the slightest bit surprised that it had happened.

"Oh," Carlisle gasped, catching on to what was happening with his family.

"What are you hoping for?" Seth cautiously asked. Alice squeezed the hand she held in reassurance.

"Not anything romantic, so stop looking so terrified. I'm sixteen and pregnant. And I have cancer. My only family is my grandfather, and he's elderly. There are others, aunts and uncles, my sisters, but they've all moved away and have their own families," Alyssa said honestly.

"The baby," Alice said quietly, not sure if she was reminding her of her newest family member or because she was concerned what Alyssa had planned if the worst happened. Stage four cancer… Alice knew the odds weren't in her favor. Especially without treatment.

"My son. Yes," Alyssa agreed, not elaborating.

"You're not with his father?" Seth asked. Alice had wanted to, but if the guy, whoever he was, hadn't come with her, it seemed like the answer was obvious.

"It was one time. We're just friends that got carried away, and he's not ready for this," she admitted, glancing back out the front window just as Carlisle was pulling into the hospital's parking lot.

Alice squeezed Seth's hand again, urging him to speak. The gesture was a promise to support whatever decision he made. They would be in this together. Forever.

"We'll help. However we can," Seth offered, sighing sadly.

"Grandpa told me how you saved him. I wouldn't be alive today if things had gone differently with the Volturi that day so long ago," Alyssa said, glancing at Seth in the rearview mirror before opening her door. "I guess it makes sense that it'd be you to help me now."

Alice helped her to stand since she was the closest, and Alyssa's full lips stretched into the first true smile she'd worn since they'd met less than an hour earlier. This close, Alice could see the toll the pregnancy and disease were having on her body. It reminded her of Bella's pregnancy, though far less extreme.

Alice and Seth sat with Alyssa while Carlisle rushed the lab to get the results sooner, and the scans sent up. While they waited, Seth asked questions about her life and interests. Slowly, she opened up and shared little pieces of her past with them.

After a while, Carlisle caught Seth's eye, and the two went into the office they shared. The hospital had been so grateful to have two doctors of their caliber, that they'd given them the space when most of the doctors didn't have private offices of their own.

"Well? How bad is it? Just tell me," Alyssa demanded when they reentered the exam room they were in.

"The cancer has metastasized," Seth said flatly.

"What does that mean?"

"It's spread to your bones and liver," Carlisle supplied when Seth seemed unable. Seth's face was pinched miserably. It was awful to see him feeling so helpless.

Alyssa only nodded, unsurprised. "My son?" she asked next. She seemed to have already resigned herself to her fate, and now all of her concern was for her unborn child.

"He is fine, but… " Seth said quickly. They'd been sure to run as many tests on him as they safely could.

"How much longer do I have?" Alyssa asked without pause.

"There isn't much we can do while you're pregnant. With the strain the pregnancy is placing on your body. You probably won't even make it full term," Seth said dully. It was the last thing he wanted to tell her, but the pull of the imprinting demanded he be straight with her.

"But you can save him," she said knowingly, with so much faith and trust, that Alice believed it too.

"I will do everything I can," Seth vowed, nodding slowly, and sharing a determined look with Carlisle.

"And after? Do you have something in mind?" Alice asked, wondering which of her relatives she was entrusting her child to. If things went poorly, Alice wanted to be able to carry out Alyssa's wishes and honor her choice.

"He'll be raised by someone that will understand his heritage, protect him, and love him the way I would have," she said, staring intently at Seth. His lips slowly parted as he realized what she was saying.

"I think Alice and I need a few minutes to talk about this," he finally said, opening the door, and waiting for Alice to exit the room before he followed her back to his office.

"Take your time. We have weeks," Alyssa called out as the door swung shut behind Seth. Alice heard the words echo down the corridor.

Weeks.

The decision needed to be made quickly because Alyssa was dying - sooner rather than later.

"I'm sorry. I really didn't ever think this would happen," Seth began immediately, wrapping Alice in a tight hug. "If I'd known, I'd… Well, hell. I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You've done nothing wrong," Alice said softly, knowing nothing had changed between them.

"You're not hurt that I imprinted," Seth stated, realizing that she wasn't angry.

He sighed in relief, and kissed her neck just beneath her ear and slipped his arms down to circle her just beneath her butt. Easily, he lifted her so they were pressed together and eye-to-eye for the remainder of this necessary conversation.

"You're not leaving me for her, even if she weren't… " Alice said, trailing off. Not for a single second did she doubt that Seth would always pick her, but it made her sad that this girl was so sick, and that she'd be gone soon.

"I love you more today than I did the day we married, and more then than the day you agreed for us to try and be a couple," Seth said easily, resting his forehead against hers and gazing deeply into her eyes. The almond shape of his eyes narrowed as he smiled at her, hooding the dark pools.

He was so gorgeous. He'd been outside more recently, they'd gone camping together last week, enjoying themselves outdoors, and the sun had kissed his skin making it more golden than ever. The longer hair, thick, black strands, with a gentle wave from frequently getting tucked behind his ears, just brushed the tops of his shoulders. Alice ran her fingers through it now, unable to resist touching the soft tresses.

"I know," she whispered, giving in and kissing him. It never got old. Not after seventy-five years together. Never would either.

"You've never desired becoming a parent," he said into her mouth, lips moving against hers.

"I haven't," Alice agreed.

"I won't accept if you're not on board," Seth said, kissing her once more, gently sipping her lips, molding his to hers.

Alice took a moment to collect her thoughts. Sometimes it was hard to think with Seth around. He literally took her breath away and emptied her mind. Only he and the present moment existed.

"In all the time I worried about you imprinting - way back when," she added, tracing her fingers down his cheek and watching his pupils react to betray his desire for her. "I never considered that if you did, it would actually turn out to be an unexpected, if bittersweet, blessing for me," she said sadly.

"So we're to become parents," Seth breathed, letting her see a hint of the excitement he'd been masking. She appreciated that he'd tried not to influence her decision or unintentionally guilt her into a situation she didn't really want.

"Not unlike how Jazz did for Mae," Alice agreed, catching a bit of his enthusiasm. "Can you do an ultrasound? I want to see him!"

"Impatient, pixie?"

"Yes. Let's go see our son," Alice breathed, swallowing thickly at the thought.

* * *

Alyssa moved in with the family after that, and they spent the next two months getting to know her, and helping her with her pregnancy. Alice and Seth both really liked her. She was sweet, realistic about life and the world, and had a wicked sense of humor. Carlisle and Esme convinced Jared to move in with them as well, and they had him packed up and settled into the room beside Alyssa two days after he agreed. It was good letting them spend this last bit of time together.

Throughout the weeks, her health continued to deteriorate. Carlisle ended up inducing labor early to give both a better chance. He and Seth agreed that with treatment, Alyssa could survive a few more months after giving birth if they did.

They were right. Alyssa lived to see the first four months of their son's life. It might not have been the best quality of life, but they all did what they could to make it sense less like a hospital had been created within the house to care for her. At least she had the chance to meet her son. Jason, Jase, was beautiful. He looked like Jared, russet skin and inky hair, but he had Alyssa's long, dark eyelashes. The elder wolf died just a few days after his granddaughter, thanking Seth for his part in looking over and continuing to protect his family.

Jasper, Bella, Mae and Jake all moved to town to be closer and help. They'd been living in New Zealand for the last six years. Edward and Maggie moved back too. Edward because he insisted watching Alice become a mother would prove far too amusing to miss out on. Alice suspected he just didn't want to make the same mistake twice. He'd been a huge presence in her of Mae's three children's childhoods, much to his daughter's delight.

Jake and Mae had lived in Seattle for just over a decade, before moving to La Push to raise their children and oversee the tribe and packs. They'd worked from home, and only left the rez to see the family, all of whom were living in Vancouver at the time, for those eighteen years to avoid questions. Afterwards, once their kids were grown and insisting on pursuing their own lives, Jake and Mae often chose to live near either Jazz and Bella or Edward and Maggie, occasionally with both sets of parents. Sometimes that meant living wherever Carlisle and Esme chose to settle the majority of them, other times, like recently they lived somewhere else altogether.

The excitement of the new arrival seemed to fill everyone in the family with a sense of wonder. Rose and Esme especially were overjoyed to help with raising a child again.

Occasionally, Alice felt guilty that being surrounded by vampires would no doubt trigger Jase's phasing at a young age the way it had Jensen, but Seth and Jensen himself had both insisted that it was a good thing and he'd love becoming a wolf. It helped that most of the Quileutes boys raised on the rez were better understood what could happen to them before they phased these days than they were back in Jacob's day. He'd taken a page out of Bella's book - prior preparation made all the difference after shifting the first time.

The only dark spot occurred when Aro wrote to ask if she'd consider raising the child in Volterra. Seth had been outraged, in a way Alice had never seen before. Alice, herself, was unable to write a diplomatic refusal. Carlisle undertook the unpleasant task for her. Only the fact that they'd extended the same 'offer' to Jacob and Mae when they'd had Jensen, and never done anything in retaliation after being refused, kept Alice from losing it completely.

Alice was finally starting to get the hang of juggling everything. Today, after over five months, was the first time she was completely alone in the house with Jase. Typically someone in their large family came up with an excuse to spend the day with the baby and one or both of his parents. Jacob had called an hour ago, saying that Seth mentioned Jase had been fussy all night and offered to come over and help, but Alice declined. She wanted this time to bond with Jase without all the usual distractions.

Today, though, his chubby cheeks were flushed crimson from crying, and his face was so scrunched that he didn't really look like a baby anymore, more a smooshed lump of clay. He'd thrown up five times already and it was barely four o'clock. Alice was fairly certain some of it was caked in her hair still, but she was doing her best not to think about it, more worried about her son's discomfort than her own.

With as much as he'd expelled, he had to be hungry. Rosalie insisted that premade food was too inferior for her nephew, so Alice had two pots on the stove boiling carrots and peas that Esme grew in their backyard garden. A chicken was in the oven. Multitasking. Cooking dinner for Seth and Jase at the same time. She had this covered - no help needed. Besides, she'd been the one to offer to do this before her husband went to work that morning.

She'd just pulled the blender from the dishwasher so she could puree everything for Jase after it was done, when Jase let out an especially disgruntled cry. The high, piercing note tugged at her heart, alarming her.

"Oh, no. Is my little man still not happy?" Alice asked, momentarily abandoning the kitchen to scoop Jase from the playpen assembled in the dining room. "Don't worry, momma is making you something to eat."

The second she started rocking the distraught baby, Jase quieted, snuggling into her neck. Alice grinned, loving the feel of his light weight in her arms.

Then he puked. Alice felt the hot, slimy liquid trickling down the back of her shirt. Lovely.

Between one breath and the next, Jase was screaming bloody murder. Nothing Alice did soothed him. He was working himself into a frenzy. A tiny, gulping gasp between screams was all he allowed himself, each one a struggle to suck the necessary air in through the collection of drool in his mouth and the contortion of his lips.

Then smoke began billowing up from the pots where all of the water had entirely evaporated and the food was now burning. Wonderful.

Alice moved to turn off the stove, and throw the destroyed remains in the sink with one hand while the other continued uselessly rocking the baby.

She'd have to start over preparing the food. There was a reason Seth insisted on cooking most of his own meals, even if he never admitted it. And Jase seemed to be settling into his stride, really getting into his fit. Perfect.

"Umm, Alice? Can I help?" Seth asked, smothering a smile as he watched her from the doorway.

He was a bit hazy as she looked at him through the black-tinged, grey smoke swirling through the kitchen. She'd been so caught up that his arrival didn't register, and she was surprised by his sudden appearance in their home.

"I love you," Alice said, immensely grateful that he'd come home when he had, almost thirty minutes early today.

"Come here, little man. Are you giving momma a hard time today?" Seth cooed, transferring Jase to his warm embrace.

Jase instantly settled in Seth's arms, nestling into them and closing his eyes. Alice glared, making Seth laugh when he caught the ferocious expression she leveled at him. Jase whimpered at being jostled, but didn't start up again.

Always, Seth had that effect on the baby. The two had instantly bonded, and Jase was enamored with his daddy. It was incredible to watch the two together, and Alice was repeatedly grateful to Alyssa for giving her husband this opportunity he'd never have asked for himself.

"I'd be whimpering too if she tried to make me eat that," Seth mock whispered conspiratorially when he glanced at the ruined food in the sink.

"That was for you," Alice deadpanned.

"I'm sure I'll relish every bite?" Seth tried, wincing and fake shuttering. Perhaps not entirely fake.

"I should make you just for that comment," Alice threatened.

"Then I'll be crying too," Seth said with a wink. "You've got -" Seth started, reaching for a towel with his free hand and using his head to gesture at a place that no doubt was still covered in traces of Jase's last meal.

"Not another word unless you want to sleep in Jase's room tonight," Alice warned.

"You look beautiful," Seth said anyways.

"Uh-huh, nice try," Alice said flatly, but when she caught sight of the look he was giving her, realized he meant it - even covered in baby vomit. She'd never stop loving this man. Never.

Alice absently stroked a finger down Jase's arm, and he whimpered again, breaking the moment.

"Why won't he stop?" Alice lamented.

"It's not you. Jase just started teething. See - look," Seth said, slipping a finger under Jase's lip to lift it up and show her the puffy gums.

Alice had noted them earlier that morning, but not realized that's what it meant. Mae and her children had all been born with a full set of teeth. They were her only regular experiences with children, having not been around day-in and day-out with Leah's sons to witness this progression of development.

"Poor dear. We never went through this with the others," Alice commented aloud.

How many other differences would there be? Probably many. Alice would need to look into this more. Rose and Esme wouldn't always be there to lean on when needed, and Bella was honestly as clueless as her despite having had a daughter herself.

Alice slipped her finger into Jase's mouth, resting it against the angriest red place. Her son immediately began gnawing on the cold digit like a soothing ice chip, settling even more into Seth's arms.

"We'll get the hang of this," Seth promised, knowing how worried Alice was about messing up.

"At least I don't need sleep, and can take some time off work," Alice agreed, nodding.

"You're incredible. We're both lucky to have you," Seth said, bending to kiss her lightly.

"I love you too," Alice vowed, silently thinking they were the lucky ones.

Life with him was never boring. Seth had once promised to surprise her, and he had. Every day for the last seventy-five years he had, and Alice knew he would continue to for the next seventy-five years. Longer. Forever.


End file.
